


The Sea Captain's House - Part 6

by Beautyinthemoonlight



Series: The Sea Captain's House [6]
Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-03
Updated: 2017-11-11
Packaged: 2019-01-08 18:41:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 44
Words: 313,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12259926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beautyinthemoonlight/pseuds/Beautyinthemoonlight
Summary: It's 2024 and Ali Krieger is the managing partner of Knight-Harris Co.  Ashlyn Harris, now retired from the NWSL, is working with The Boston Breakers, K-H, The MHI, Lifetime TV and the NWSL as well as trying to get The Academy up and running.  They are moms to four kids under the age of 5, step-moms to a tween, and busier than they've ever been before.  What's life like in the big old house now?  How will they manage to keep their love alive when they barely have time to breathe?  There are more babies and weddings and other major milestones for friends and family as well.  A new face from Drew's school gets added to the mix while an unforeseen foe forces hard conversations and difficult decisions.  As usual, they'll face the ups and downs of parenthood and life together...always together, for better or for worse.





	1. The Happiest Place on Earth

**Author's Note:**

> Part 6 picks up right where we left off and welcomes 2024. I decided there was too much going on in the story to start skipping ahead yet. So this is another meaty installment like the others and it'll cover two very busy years, 2024 & 2025\. There's lots of kids stuff because, well, they've got four little kids and if you've ever had little kids then you know that's pretty much what it's all about. Don't worry, they're still going to get busy from time to time. They're only human. ;) I'm not sure if anybody's still interested in this story or not, but I'll keep writing it until I'm not - which won't be anytime soon. 
> 
> Oh! Almost forgot - smut warning at the end of this chapter.
> 
> There's a Tumblr Blog dedicated to this story if you want to check it out. Watch out for spoilers though if you're just starting this Series. Search 'beautyinthemoonlight1124' if you want to see pictures of characters, story elements, floor plans of the big old house and other buildings in the work, Family Tree charts, and other things.

The happiest place on earth had been a pretty great host to the young Krieger and Harris families the first week of January. Christmas, the very first ever for the twins, had been on a Monday that year, and Ashlyn and Ali flew with their four young children down to Orlando on Saturday morning, December 30th. They had taken Drew to Disney World when he was 2-1/2 years old and it had been a fun, memorable, and emotional day-long experience for all three of them. They had wanted to bring Josie but she was so young, 6 months old, and so little and still not so healthy that they decided to leave her with Tammye and Carol. They both thought it was sort of silly to bring a child younger than 2 to Disney World anyway because they wouldn’t remember it and it would be such a hassle to worry about bottles and breastfeeding and all of those extra things. Well this January Josie was 2-1/2 and Drew was 4-1/2 and Ali and Ashlyn really wanted to take them to the Magic Kingdom, at least. But the twins were only 8 months old. If they waited for the twins to be 2 years old then that would mean Josie would have to wait until she was 4 to go for her first time. 

All of this was so extra, and they both knew it. Most kids were lucky to go at all, ever. These young Krieger kids were beyond lucky and both their moms appreciated it. But there was something about having relatives who lived so close to Disney World that made taking their kids there so much easier and do-able. Johnny and Lizzy went a couple of times a year if Chris and Beth could manage the admittance ticket to the park. Ali and Kyle had been once, on a family trip when they were 9 and 10 years old, respectively. They had stayed at the Port Orleans Riverside Resort, the most recent addition to the onsite resorts in 1993. Ken and Deb had planned for and saved for the trip for years and all four of them had a wonderful time together that week in July. It had been insanely hot and humid but the resort prices were lower then, just for that reason. Ali and Sydney had gone back when they were in college, driving to Florida for Spring Break with two other friends. One of the other girls lived a few towns away from Disney World and her parents let her bring three friends with her to stay for the week.

Ashlyn and Chris had been several times when they were younger, but only for day trips. Gram or Gramps would make the hour and fifteen-minute drive and try and keep up with the overactive kids. They each had a certain amount of money to spend on food or Disney merchandise and neither kid ever spent a dime on food when they were there. It was a frenzied race to cram as many rides into their limited amount of time as humanly possible. Everything was always a blur, but a fun one. It was hard to say which experience was better when it was all said and done. The short, frenetic day trips or the week-long resort vacations were both full of pluses and minuses for everybody. But the truth of the matter was that Ashlyn and Chris had always wanted to stay at one of the onsite resorts and could just never afford to. 

The first time Ashlyn stayed at one of the resorts had been during Spring break in college. She had come home with a new girlfriend she was trying to impress and blew her whole spending money bank for the semester on a nice, three-day, two-night stay at the Caribbean Beach Resort. It was a lot of fun but the girlfriend hadn’t lasted much longer than the trip did and Ashlyn certainly hadn’t felt comfortable telling her what a big deal it had been for her to finally stay in one of the resorts. The keeper had stayed in one of the resorts four or five more times over the years without revealing the importance to any of her travelling companions. Only Whitney had ever guessed at the magnitude of it and she had given her best friend permission to not talk about it if she didn’t want to. Ashlyn took four days to finally confess her childhood longing to Whitney and then sworn her to secrecy, as if they were twelve-year olds instead of twenty-year olds. The first time she had stayed in one of the resorts with Ali, the month before the brunette officially moved into the big old house back in 2016, Ashlyn had been too distracted by the fireworks and the new sex toy she had packed in her checked luggage for them to bother thinking much about how different her finances and situation were then compared to her childhood. But this trip with all four of their kids had brought up all of those thoughts and memories and issues for the blonde. 

“I think we should just do our own thing and book the resort we want for the reasons we want and just leave well enough alone” she had argued her point when Ali brought it up back in April. 

Ashlyn was 8 months pregnant then and just as uncomfortable about the idea of a big, joint family vacation at Disney World as she was carrying the twins at that time. When they were planning their Florida trip last February, the one where they left their kids with Deb in Miami before driving to Key West while Ashlyn was pregnant with the twins, somebody mentioned doing a big family vacation at Disney World the next year, right after Christmas. The idea had taken off with a flurry of emails and phone calls among Beth, Tammye, Deb and Ali, which was why the brunette was asking her wife about it back in April.

“Well we can’t just do that” Ali frowned, a little annoyed at Ashlyn’s unreasonable proposition. “We’re already talking about it” she continued as her forehead creased and her brow furrowed. 

“Chris and Beth can’t afford to stay where we want to stay Al” the blonde offered bluntly, eager to get the conversation over with. “And what happened to just hunkering down for the first year with the twins?” she challenged with a tilt of her head. “How did we get from not taking any trips to planning on spending thousands of dollars to take four kids to a Disney resort anyway?” she finished sharply.

Ali took a breath and kept folding the clothes in front of her on their bed, trying to hear past her wife’s abrupt tone. It felt like that’s all they did after the kids went to sleep each night – washed the dishes, folded laundry, paid bills and cleaned the house. Even though the house cleaner came twice a week there was always a mess that needed mopping or vacuuming or sweeping. Always. As she focused on sorting the small socks into matching pairs she considered what her keeper had just said. She wasn’t wrong about either comment. 

“Well, then let’s tell everybody we’re out” she replied simply, shrugging her shoulders and meeting Ashlyn’s frustrated gaze. “You’re right. The plan was to just stay close to home for the first year with the twins. Maybe we need to stick to that.”

Ashlyn was surprised by her wife’s acquiescence and wasn’t sure what to say next. She sat there and watched Ali fold the top of one small sock down over its’ matched mate and then group the little sock balls into a pile for Josie and another for Drew. The brunette frowned and mumbled to herself as she grabbed the three leftover, odd socks off the bed and set them aside so she could look in each child’s room for their mates the next morning. The keeper couldn’t help but chuckle as she watched her beautiful brunette put the clean, folded laundry back into the laundry basket, with the stray socks on top.

“What’s so funny?” Ali quirked her eyebrow as she came back to the bed, pushing her glasses up her nose.

“You. Just you” the blonde smiled warmly at her wife. “I love you so much. Especially when you mutter at the missing socks” she giggled.

“God that drives me crazy” Ali sighed and sat on the bed heavily, leaning her head back against the headboard and closing her eyes for a few seconds. “Stupid fucking socks. Where do they go?”

It was quiet for a minute and then she started giggling. Ashlyn quickly joined her, reaching her hand over to intertwine their fingers as the giggles turned to outright laughter. Leave it to something dumb like missing socks to strike them both funny at the weirdest time. It went on for a full two minutes until they both had tears streaming down their faces and were out of breath. After another minute they wiped their faces and caught their breath.

“I really want to take Josie to Disney World” the keeper finally said, softly, as she squeezed Ali’s hand. “She’ll be 2-1/2 in January and I really want to watch her experience everything for the first time there” she continued as Ali watched her patiently. “And I don’t want to leave the twins with your mom or my mom. They’ll be 7 months old and I’ll be breastfeeding...” she paused and rubbed the back of her neck with her free hand. “So we keep the twins with us. And that means we need to stay as close as we can to the Magic Kingdom so we’re not spending all day on the monorail or one of the buses. Josie will need a nap right after lunch and the twins are going to need...” she blew a breath out and sighed, “everything.” She closed her eyes and sighed again, louder. 

“It’s a lot babe, you’re right” the brunette offered quietly.

Another moment passed and Ali waited for Ashlyn to get out what was really bothering her, besides the logistics, about the trip.

“I don’t want to make Johnny and Lizzy feel the way Chris and I did when we were kids” the keeper finally admitted, her voice barely a whisper. “I’d rather not go at all.”

Ali tried to get her brain to make sense of what her wife was telling her but struggled. She could tell by the look on Ashlyn’s face that this was a big deal and something that the blonde felt very strongly about. She moved closer to her keeper and pressed a warm kiss to her cheek, pulling back when she felt tears start falling there.

“Tell me babe” she kissed some of Ashlyn’s tears away and kept her face close.

“Ugh these hormones are fucking killing me” Ashlyn moaned and took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. It’s not that big a deal...” she lied.

“Shhhh” Ali kissed her lips, slowly and tenderly. “Just tell me what’s going on Ash.”

The keeper spent twenty minutes telling her wife about her experiences with Disney World as a little girl who had far less money than any of her friends or schoolmates. Ali felt her heart tug and she racked her brain as she listened, trying to remember if Ashlyn had ever mentioned anything about this when they had stayed at The Beach Club resort near Epcot back in 2016. 

“I never told you any of this before because...well, it never really came up” Ashlyn explained as if she could read her wife’s mind. “When we took Drew we just went for the day and it didn’t matter.”

She looked sheepishly up at Ali and the brunette swore she was looking into the face of her wife as a sad, sensitive, confused ten-year old.

“So you want to do the trip but you want to stay at the Contemporary or the Grand Floridian...” Ali began, trying to find a logical route through her wife’s confusing feelings.

“Because they’re the closest to the Magic Kingdom” Ashlyn quickly interjected.

“Right, they’re within walking distance” Ali nodded thoughtfully. “Or one quick stop on the monorail. They’re perfect. But they’re also two of the most expensive resorts in the whole place and you know Chris and Beth won’t be able to afford to stay there too.”

“Exactly” the keeper exhaled and leaned her head back against the headboard, relieved that it was out in the open now. “They’ll need to stay at one of the value level resorts like Art of Animation or Pop Century and they’re way out by the ESPN Wide World of Sports area.”

They were both quiet for several minutes, hands still together as they sat next to each other against the headboard. This had been an issue for as long as Ali had been a member of the Harris clan. Money. It was awkward and frustrating and it wasn’t going to go away. She secretly wished that Ashlyn and Chris would just talk about it and decide how they wanted to handle it so everybody wasn’t always pussyfooting around the subject. Inheriting Gram’s house had been the ideal solution for the young family and Chris felt grateful for it every day. He also felt a little guilty too. They weren’t making a ton of money but enough to live and give their kids what they needed now. Before inheriting Gram’s house they weren’t always sure when they could pay all their bills each month. At least now they weren’t living paycheck to paycheck anymore. 

“What if we offered to just take the kids, and Chris and Beth didn’t come?” Ali suggested carefully. “Your mom and Carol are getting a room and my mom is staying with us...”

“You guys have it all planned out already?” Ashlyn asked, shocked at the speed with which they had moved on the ‘tentative plans’.

“Not completely” the brunette replied. “We haven’t booked anything yet but we’re getting close. That’s why I asked you about it.”

“But Beth is planning it with you guys isn’t she?”

“Yeah, but she’s practical” Ali shrugged. “I’ll just explain why we’re staying where we’re staying and let her decide what she wants to do. If they say they can’t make it work, then we can offer to take Johnny and Lizzy for the week...”

“Oh God, what a nightmare” Ashlyn groaned and closed her eyes.

“Other families figure this out” Ali countered. “Other people do this all the time. There’s no reason we can’t figure it out too” she encouraged and reached over to squeeze her wife’s bicep as she kissed her shoulder. “Like, how about if we do no Christmas presents this year between our two families and put the money towards the resort? How about that? Disney can be the big Christmas gift for all of us.”

“I don’t know Al” Ashlyn bit her bottom lip as she thought hard about the problem. “Maybe.” She blew another breath out and then turned her head to face her beautiful wife, kissing her lips sweetly. “I’ll talk to Chris” she mumbled against Ali’s soft lips and kissed them again.

“Promise?” the brunette asked, lips still pressed against her keeper’s.

“Promise” Ashlyn replied and smiled into another kiss.

Ultimately they had decided to give the gift of Disney that Christmas and Tammye and Carol had done the same thing which helped make it possible for Chris and Beth to reserve a one-bedroom suite in the Bay Lake Tower which was attached to the Contemporary Resort by a glass-enclosed walkway on the fourth floor. Ali and Ashlyn reserved a two-bedroom suite on the same floor, the twelfth, with an incredible view of the Magic Kingdom right from their room. Carol and Tammye reserved a regular room with two queen-sized beds so two grandchildren at a time could have sleepovers with Gigi and Caro if they wanted. The one-bedroom suite had a king-size bed in the bedroom with a desk, dresser, flat-screen tv, and its own full bathroom with a big soaking tub. The main room of the suite had a kitchenette complete with a stove, microwave, refrigerator and sink near the entranceway. There was also another full bathroom here but just a standard one – just a regular old tub and shower combo. There was a long table with a banquette bench on the wall across from the kitchenette and a small island between the long table and the kitchenette with two comfy stools. At the far end of the room, near the big floor to ceiling windows with the view of the Magic Kingdom, was a queen-size pullout sofa-bed and a twin-size pullout armchair-bed. 

Mike and Lydia had toyed with the idea of joining the family trip but Lydia wasn’t going to waste the money she had been saving to take her own granddaughter there and nobody could blame her. Mike chipped in what he could and stayed with Chris and Beth and their kids. Lizzy and Johnny took the sofa-bed and Mike took the pullout in the big armchair. The whole setup was surprisingly comfy. Ashlyn and Ali’s two-bedroom suite was the same as Chris and Beth’s except that it had a second bedroom on the other side of the main room. That second bedroom had two queen-size beds, another dresser, another tv and another full bathroom. The couple took the king-size bedroom and kept the twins in there with them in resort-supplied pack and play cribs. Deb took one of the queen beds in the second bedroom and Drew and Josie took the other one. Each suite had a balcony off of each bedroom so you could sit out and enjoy the warm Florida sun, even in January. The balcony doors also had a safety feature that the parents could lock so no little ones went somewhere they weren’t supposed to. Carol and Tammye had keys to both suites and came and went easily among the rooms and families.

It really had been the happiest place on earth for the most part. Johnny was 6-1/2 and Lizzy was about to turn 4 at the end of January and neither of them napped anymore. They, and Drew, were the big kids and Josie and the twins were the little kids. The group got an early start every day and, after eating breakfast at one of the three restaurants in the resort, hit the Magic Kingdom when it opened at 8am. The weather was clear and beautiful all week and the temperature was in the low 80s almost every day. The nights were cooler, dropping all the way down into the 60s so you definitely needed a sweater if you were going out in the evening. All four grandparents joined them each day and took turns helping mostly with the twins. There was a ‘Baby Care Center’ in each of the parks at Disney World and the one in the Magic Kingdom was right on Main Street. Ashlyn and whichever grandparent volunteered went in there to feed the babies whenever it was time. The keeper was blown away by how accommodating the staff was and also by how well-equipped and helpful all of the equipment and the set-up was. You could rent a stroller, single or a double, by the day or the week. You could bring a backpack of supplies into the park for your babies and bigger kids, including food and snacks for them. They had thought of everything you would need to take care of your baby while you were enjoying the park at the same time. It was impressive as hell. They ate lunch in the park and then Ashlyn, or Ali, and a couple of other grandparents went back to the resort for Josie’s naptime, bringing the twins with them to get them out of the hustle and bustle for a while. 

The resort itself, both the Bay Lake Tower and the Contemporary, was amazing. There were at least two different pools at each location as well as a splash pool for the littler ones and a hot tub for the grown-ups. There was a video arcade and a family game room and one of the restaurants, Chef Mickey’s, even did character meals. They were incredibly popular and you had to make reservations well in advance, but how awesome would it be to eat breakfast with Mickey Mouse, Minnie Mouse, Pluto, Donald Duck or Goofy? 

“Look who’s here!” Ali said excitedly, her eyes wide and bright as her face broke into a nose-crinkling grin.

She had just sat down after getting Drew something different to eat at the breakfast buffet, the waffles he had chosen first weren’t doing it for him after all. It was their second morning at the resort, Monday, and everybody was excited about the character breakfast at Chef Mickey’s. 4-1/2 year old Drew was shy, as his moms knew he would be, and he ducked his head down and buried his face in Ali’s arm when Minnie Mouse approached their group of small tables. The boy had finally figured out how to pronounce his Rs but his shyness was proving to be a bigger hurdle. He watched Minnie carefully as she interacted with a beaming Lizzy and Josie, waving her big white paws and tilting her head in a friendly, non-threatening way. She was decked out in kitchen garb with a colorful apron around her neck, as were all the characters in the room because that was the theme for the restaurant. Donald Duck and Pluto were the other two characters in the big dining room that morning, spread out evenly among the eager patrons and grinning children. Honestly, the parents had smiles just as big as they watched their kids have one of the greatest experiences of their young lives. 

Minnie teased Johnny, silently of course which was an amazing thing to see the way the ‘actors’ got their messages across with only body language and hand gestures, because he didn’t have any fruit on his breakfast plate and had the whole group laughing, including Johnny. Drew had chuckled at the interaction but Minnie noticed he hadn’t left his mom’s side the whole time. She cocked her head and asked Ali if it was ok to approach them in their seats on the banquette. The brunette nodded and gave Drew’s shoulder a little squeeze to remind him she was there and that he was safe. Minnie got down on her knees between the two tables closest to Drew and put her paw out, palm up.

“Do you want to shake Minnie’s hand?” Ali asked evenly, trying not to coddle the boy, knowing he would have to conquer at least some of his shyness before too long.

“How about a high-five?” Ashlyn asked from her spot a few seats away at the next table, Dodge squirming in her arms and trying to get closer to the Disney character.

Minnie changed her paw into a high-five position and tilted her head encouragingly. In the few seconds pause, Lizzy reached over and gave her a high-five instead and everybody cheered. Minnie put her other hand up too for Josie to do the same thing, which the little redhead did with an adorable giggle and grin. Ali gave her wife a concerned look and the blonde shrugged her shoulders as Dodge yelled out a string of his best sounds to get Minnie’s attention. There was only so much they could do to help their son with his confidence and shyness and they both realized it. But they were sad to see him missing out on something that might not happen again. Just as Minnie turned her head to acknowledge Dodge’s antics and wave at him with her other hand, Drew reached out and gave her a high-five, smile on his face and other hand clenched tightly to Ali’s hand in her lap. Minnie turned back to him and pretended to be shy and flattered by his attention which made Drew smile even bigger as he heard various family members tell him what a good job he had done. He looked up into Ali’s face for one last bit of encouragement and then put both his hands up for a high-ten which Minnie returned with lots of head nods and claps afterwards. She got up and moved along to her next group of tables, stopping for one last group picture of the four biggest kids huddled around her. It had been a very good start to the day and both Ashlyn and Ali were glad Drew had been brave so early in the week. It just meant the rest of their time and his interactions had a better chance of going smoothly as they saw different characters throughout the park properties. 

And did they see characters? Every morning they went to a park, then back to the resort for naps and some down time in the afternoon. Then sometimes they went back to the Magic Kingdom after dinner for a quick stroll around Main Street. Ashlyn made sure to take Drew to all of the dinosaur rides and exhibits in the Animal Kingdom park. They even ate lunch at the T-Rex restaurant in Disney Springs, part of Downtown Disney, twice that week. Once they had hit all three of the parks they were interested in, they collectively decided not to visit Hollywood Studios that trip, the group split up some days to go back for second visits. The three grandmas stayed behind to take care of the twins one day so Ali and Ashlyn could take Drew and Josie back to the Animal Kingdom for the whole day. Mike Harris joined them, wanting to spend as much time as he could with the grandchildren he didn’t see that often. It was a risky day because Josie didn’t get a very good nap, having to settle for lying down in the stroller in the shadiest and quietest area Ali could find, and was a crank monster for the better part of the evening. But they did their best and made those type of calculated decisions, knowing they would have to deal with a bratty 2-1/2 year old that night. It was worth it though because they got to spend the whole day together with Mike and all of the cool animals and rides and dinosaurs. 

“How’d she do?” Ashlyn asked when she, Mike and Drew joined Ali and a red-faced, grumpy Josie on a bench right after her short nap. 

“Not great, but an hour is better than nothing” the brunette replied hopefully. “Right?”

The keeper stood in front of the bench, handed her wife a strawberry smoothie and kissed Josie’s head in her spot in Ali’s lap.

“Right” Ashlyn smiled and gave her wife a peck on the lips.

“Here JoJo” Drew held out the kid-sized version of the same strawberry smoothie which Josie had loved when they were at the Animal Kingdom earlier that week. Ashlyn helped him with it because he was clutching his own smoothie in his other arm, holding it tightly to his chest.

“Aw, what a nice brother” Ali praised her son with a smile as she watched Josie tentatively take the plastic cup from Drew. “What do you say?” she squeezed her daughter’s hip as she sat on her lap.

“’ank ‘oo” she replied, her lips already around the big straw as she started to suck the smoothie into her mouth.

Mike sat down next to Ali on the side closest to his granddaughter and gently rubbed Josie’s back.

“Hi little one” he smiled as she turned her head to see who was touching her, lips never leaving the straw. “We missed you. Did you have a good nap?”

She sighed heavily and leaned back towards Mike. Ali let her go and Mike pulled the toddler into his lap where she snuggled in and continued to enjoy her treat. The brunette rolled her eyes at Ashlyn who chuckled as she watched her daughter. Josie loved men. Her moms tried hard not to take it personally and chose to look at it as a positive thing. Koty was hands-down her favorite. Then she went for whomever she hadn’t seen in a while, as if she was making sure to keep all her options open. If Mike or Chris Harris were around they were the next on the list but she really wasn’t fussy about it. Next door neighbor Neil Donaldson would do the trick just as well. Thankfully, her yen for men didn’t extend to strangers. It was only guys she had spent time with before that she wanted to sit with and be held by and interact with. Ashlyn was pretty sure that in that moment their daughter would have had a hissy fit if Mike hadn’t been there with them. 

Both kids loved the Animal Kingdom because they both loved animals. Ali’s heart swelled when she recognized her wife’s compassion on display in each of their four children. The twins weren’t quite big enough yet to show it in the sweet ways that Drew and Josie did, but the brunette knew it was there. Lily in particular loved the dogs more than any of her siblings did, and they all loved the dogs a lot. Dodge was hard to tell because he was so active and non-stop but Ali was sure his heart was just as tender as the rest of them. Drew’s second favorite place, and it was a very close second after Dinoland in the Animal Kingdom, was Bruce’s Sharkworld at Epcot. Ashlyn had passed her love of, or fascination for, sharks down to both of her eldest children but Drew had embraced it the most. And little Josie was in princess heaven. The moms made sure they tracked down both Ariel and Merida for pictures and, hopefully, a sweet greeting for their fellow redhead. 

There were fireworks every night at the Magic Kingdom at 8:30pm, right after the Nighttime parade and the Kriegers and Harrises could watch every minute of them from their rooms with their parkside views from the twelfth floor. It was pretty cool and a great way to end every night. They all gathered in the Krieger’s big suite and sat out on the balcony together oohing and aahhing at the beautiful display in the sky. It was so close to the holidays that the Magic Kingdom was still decorated for Christmas with lights and all sorts of holiday accoutrements. Ashlyn had gotten very used to the winter holiday in New England and loved it more than she ever thought she would. But even down there in sunny Florida the pretty lights and decorations sparkled at night and gave everything that magical Christmas feel. It was a great vacation and the keeper was so thankful that Ali had pushed her a little bit to commit to the trip. It was definitely something they would always remember. 

“Can you believe all of this?” Chris asked his sister one evening while the two younger couples were out together for a grown-up night. “I’m going to be 40 next month, we’ve got 6 kids between us, you’re an old retired lady, and we’re chillin’ here in this swank restaurant with our beautiful wives...” he grinned at his sister as they sat adjacent to each other at the square dining table. “Who knew this was going to be our life?”

The grandparents had surprised the four of them with this dinner reservation and told them there was no backing out. The fine dining restaurant was on the top floor of the Bay Lake Tower they were staying in and it had some of the best views of the entire Disney World properties anywhere. Some of the tables even had a view of the 8:30pm fireworks and Carol had made sure to arrange for one of those tables for two of her favorite couples. Ali and Beth were deep in conversation about the fight that Josie and Lizzy had had earlier that day, making sure they both understood who had done what and why. It was important to make sure there were no lingering hurt feelings between the girls or their parents. They were waiting for their desserts and the fireworks show to start in about fifteen minutes.

“I never saw this” Ashlyn smiled softly and shook her head as she gazed appreciatively at her beautiful brunette on the other side of her at the table. “Not in my wildest dreams. And fuck you. Old retired lady my ass. Grandpa 40” she smacked his forearm on the table.

“Ow” he chuckled and reached to grab the keeper’s hand with his own in a surprisingly sweet and sentimental moment. “I can’t get Gram out of my head this whole trip” he said quietly but not quite sadly. “Think how happy she’d be with the two of us and all of these great grandkids of hers” he smiled. “God I miss her. But you’re right Bash, I finally got to where I’m not pissed off anymore and it’s so much better. Now when I think about her it just makes me smile.”

“Told you” she replied with her own soft smile as she squeezed his hand. She let the moment last just a bit longer. “Now let go of my hand you weirdo, your wife’s over there” she pulled her hand back and nodded at Beth who, along with Ali, was watching the rare, tender moment between the two boisterous siblings.

“Everything ok over there?” Ali grinned at her beautiful wife who took her hand and rubbed her thumb across the back of it.

“Much better now” she teased and winked at the brunette.

They ate their dessert, enjoyed the fireworks and, surprisingly, missed their kids even though it had only been three hours since they had last seen them. It had been wonderful to have a night off or out or away. To talk to grown-ups about grown-up things and swear whenever they felt like it – as long as nobody else’s children could hear. Ali and Ashlyn had sat at the bar enjoying a couple of vacation drinks and flirting with each other before meeting Chris and Beth for dinner. Neither of them had brought anything fancy to wear but even the fine dining restaurants knew most of their guests would be on vacation. ‘Resort’ attire was acceptable, but not ‘casual resort’ attire. No flip flops or short shorts or tank tops allowed. Both women had been able to pull an outfit together. Ashlyn in a pair of jeans and a nice polo shirt and Ali in a simple, dark purple sundress. She wore her hair down, shorter now, just an inch or two below her shoulders, and her keeper loved it. With four kids it was impractical for her to have her hair down very often so she swept it up into one of her buns so it didn’t get pulled, dragged through somebody’s mess, or in the way of seeing the trouble one of the kids was about to get into. The shorter length meant she couldn’t use the top bun anymore and mostly settled for a regular bun at the back of her head, sometimes opting for the low bun at the nape of her neck instead. 

It was always such a relief to both Ashlyn and Ali when their physical attraction to each other was reinforced or reproved. The simple sight of Ali’s beautiful chocolate locks falling over her shoulder or Ashlyn’s favorite little mole on the front of her brunette’s neck still made the keeper’s heart skip a beat. She loved the way Ali’s neck and throat moved whenever she chuckled or laughed. She always had and she was very sure she always would. Ashlyn loved to touch Ali’s lower back and her shoulders. She especially loved to play with her long hair across her back when it was down like it was that night. Her favorite place to touch Ali was, of course, her gorgeous ass, but that wasn’t allowed in public. The subtle, gentle touches that the blonde could pull off when they were with friends or out to dinner or even just at the grocery store were what made her happiest, even after so long together. Of course she preferred their private time when they were both naked and moaning each other’s name – that went without saying. But those times were harder and harder to achieve now that their lives were so busy and full with kids and all of the activities that went with them. Ashlyn still got a thrill from standing with her arm around her wife’s shoulder, rubbing her thumb across the top of it and occasionally playing with her hair as they stood and waited for Drew’s soccer team’s turn to take the pitch. Those were her go-to spots for innocent touches. And in the summer when it was too hot and Ali started to sweat she didn’t like to be touched very much. The skin on skin contact became too sticky and made her even hotter. Ashlyn changed tactics and hooked her thumb in Ali’s belt-loop or held onto her hip instead of the bare skin at her waist at times like that. As long as she could touch her, even through a layer of clothing, she would do it. She needed to do it. She loved to do it.

Ali felt the same way, but her favorite places to touch her gorgeous keeper were her arms, her biceps in particular. If she was standing anywhere near her, Ali would almost instinctively put a hand on her wife’s bicep, wrapping her fingers around it from behind with her closest hand, or using her opposite hand to reach across her own body and grab it from in front, tucking her fingers between Ashlyn’s arm and body. The brunette also loved to sneak a sly little graze to the side of Ashlyn’s breast while she accomplished either bicep hold. It had been a real struggle for her to amend her habit while Ashlyn’s breasts were sore from breastfeeding. It just felt wrong to hold onto her arm like that without stealing a glancing touch to her favorite breasts at the same time. Ali also loved the back of her keeper’s neck and she always had, even before the short hair came into their lives. But once the back of Ashlyn’s neck turned into such a textural wonderland for her fingertips, Ali was impossibly drawn to it. And like Ali’s tiny mole on the front of her neck was a focal point and slow-rolling turn-on for Ashlyn, the very small scar at the bottom edge of the right side of Ashlyn’s chin was what got the brunette going when all of the more intimate body parts were covered. She loved to watch it move as Ashlyn spoke. That little scar and the freckles that dotted her fair skin after the summer sun had spent time there were both favorite spots for Ali. Most people wouldn’t notice either thing but the brunette’s worshipful gaze appreciated everything on her love’s body no matter how small or seemingly insignificant.

That night at the bar they held hands and enjoyed their drinks while their eyes went to their favorite places and transmitted messages back to their brains and libidos. After dinner they went for a stroll, arm in arm with heads bent close together, talking softly and taking their time. When they finally went back to their suite it was almost 10pm and everything was quiet. Ali went into the second bedroom as silently as she could and found her mother, Drew and Josie all asleep in their beds, just as they should be. The small, travel-sized ‘sound machine’ piping alternating sounds of beach, forest, rain, babbling brook, meadow, and four different types of fan sounds and other white noise sounds into the room, had everybody in a blissful state of slumber. That and they were all exhausted every single night from their jam-packed days at Disney World. Ashlyn went into their bedroom on the other side of the main suite room and found both twins fast asleep as well, the second sound machine casting its spell too. The keeper went into the kitchenette and sat at the counter to pump breastmilk before going to bed. Ali hugged her from behind and kissed the back of her neck, enjoying the spark that passed between she and her wife.

“Everything ok in there?” she nodded towards the master bedroom as she moved to the side of Ashlyn’s stool so she could see her beautiful face.

“Yeah, they’re both out” she smiled and kissed Ali’s hand that had cupped her face while she spoke. “Your mom left us a note, said everything went fine but Josie wouldn’t take a bath.”

“Your daughter is so stubborn” Ali rolled her eyes and sighed.

“My daughter?” Ashlyn raised her eyebrows as they spoke quietly, just loud enough to hear over the pump. “How come she’s my daughter when she’s stubborn? Sounds an awful lot like another stubborn Krieger I know...”

“Oh zip it” Ali leaned forward and kissed her lips slowly, keeping her hand on her wife’s soft cheek.

“How are things in there?” Ashlyn asked with a nod towards the second bedroom.

“Perfect” Ali purred and kissed her keeper again, putting a little more heat into it.

“Mmmmmmm...don’t start something now” Ashlyn cautioned. “There’s no way I’m getting caught on this couch by your mom or one of our kids so don’t even...”

The brunette kissed her again, soundly. She deepened the kiss and pushed her tongue through Ashlyn’s lips as soon as she was allowed access. Ali moved her hand from her wife’s cheek to the back of her neck and felt her own body start to ignite as she stood there. Ashlyn whimpered into the kiss, surprised by the level of passion her wife was displaying in the happiest place on earth and frustrated because she knew they weren’t going to be able to actually have sex. She pulled back and kept her eyes closed, trying to calm her now raging hormones. The blonde opened her mouth to protest but Ali cut her off with a finger to her lips.

“Shhhhh. Just...finish what you’re doing here and meet me in our bathroom” Ali gave her one last kiss and giggled as she disappeared behind the door into the master bedroom.

Ali crept to the dresser in the master bedroom, pulled out pajamas for she and Ashlyn and moved into the big master bathroom, closing the door almost all the way behind her before turning the light on. The bathroom was deep with the soaking tub being the foremost part of the room. The front wall of the bathroom faced the rest of the master bedroom and had a big, glass window that you could look through and see out the big sliding doors to the balcony through the rest of the master bedroom. It had been designed, one could only assume, so that you could enjoy a nice soak and watch the fireworks at night, or just take in the beautiful view from up there on the twelfth floor during the day. There were curtains you could pull from inside the tub if you didn’t want to soak and look out the window at the same time. Or if you didn’t want everybody in the master bedroom to watch you as you soaked. Behind the soaking tub was the open area with a sink and vanity against the left wall and then behind that area, through a pocket door, was the toilet room on the left and a square shower on the right. Ali turned the light on in the toilet/shower room and closed the pocket door halfway, then turned off the light in the main part of the bathroom. Perfect mood lighting for the creative married couple who didn’t get to have sex as much as they used to. She used the bathroom, washed her face and got ready for bed, finishing just as Ashlyn entered the bathroom with a yawn.

“Is the light out?” she asked innocently as she reached for the switch. 

“No, don’t turn it on...it’s too bright” Ali answered quickly as she crossed the six-foot space between them and wrapped her arms around her keeper’s waist. “Just come here...” she purred and nibbled on her neck and ear as she pulled her back away from the door and the light switch. “Just hurry up and get ready for bed” she instructed and moved both hands down to squeeze her keeper’s ass. “I’ll be right back. Stay here.”

Ashlyn chuckled to herself as she brushed her teeth, washed her face, took her contacts out and changed into her sleep shorts and t-shirt. She didn’t know what Ali had up her sleeve, but she definitely had something planned. The blonde was exhausted but she hoped there would never be a day when she would willingly choose sleep over a playful, sexy Ali Krieger. She just hoped the twins didn’t wake up. They were still waking up at night, once or twice a week, instead of sleeping all the way through. She prayed tonight wouldn’t be one of those nights. When she squeezed herself back through the half-open pocket door after using the toilet Ashlyn saw her wife’s handiwork. Ali had spread the two extra blankets, for the pullouts that they weren’t using in the main room of the suite, across the floor in the open part of the bathroom. She folded them in thirds so they gave a little bit of padding on the hard tile floor. It was roughly the size of a short twin bed but it would certainly do the trick. There were two extra pillows there too.

“Well what’s all of this?” she asked playfully as she watched Ali close and lock the bathroom door behind her with a bottle of water in her hand.

“Honey, if I have to explain this to you then we’re in more trouble than I thought” she chuckled and set the bottle of water on the floor near the blanket.

“Are we...in trouble?” Ashlyn swallowed nervously and tried to remember the last time they had had sex. She couldn’t get her brain to work because she was watching her beautiful brunette strip her pajamas off and walk towards her. “God you’re gorgeous” she whispered.

“I was just joking babe” Ali smiled. “But if you don’t get naked with me in the next five seconds then we might have some trouble” she smirked as she slid her hands inside the back of her keeper’s sleep shorts and squeezed her ass again.

They stood in the middle of the dimly lit open area and kissed passionately, hands and arms reaching and groping as their lips and tongues worked feverishly in each other’s mouth. When they finally broke for air Ashlyn leaned back and pulled her t-shirt over her head while Ali dropped to her knees and pulled her sleep shorts down to her ankles. The brunette felt a gush between her own legs when she looked up at her wife’s beautiful body. She kissed the tops of her thighs while she put her hands back where they had just been – on her favorite ass cheeks. Ali moaned as she moved her lips across Ashlyn’s hips, licking at her soft skin and breathing in the scent of her desire.

“Fuck you smell good...” she abandoned her plan to continue kissing all the way across to the other hip and then down her other leg and, instead, moved down to Ashlyn’s short hairs pressing a warm, open-mouthed kiss to her mound with another moan.

“Shhhh” Ashlyn groaned softly at both the sensation her wife’s mouth had just caused as well as the sound. “You have to be quiet Al” she warned as sternly as she could.

“I will, I will” Ali nodded desperately as she looked up and met her wife’s darkening eyes.

They stared at each other for a few seconds, transferring love and trust and desire back and forth at warp speed. Then, without any warning, Ali stuck her tongue out and delivered a hard stroke from the bottom of Ashlyn’s entrance all the way up to her clit, hungrily sucking on the bundle of nerves and moaning, quieter, at the sweet taste of her wife’s pussy.

“Jesus Christ” Ashlyn exhaled while her whole body tensed at the sensation. Her legs started to shake when Ali tried to spread them out wide. “Whoa, goddamn baby” she exclaimed as she lost her balance.

Ali, always stronger than Ashlyn remembered or thought her to be, held her up and walked her back two steps to the makeshift bed. The keeper lay down on her back and smiled sweetly at her wife who, she could tell, was dying to get back to her meal.

“You ok?” she asked, her concerned voice tinged with urgency and lust.

“I’m good, thanks to you” Ashlyn smiled shyly at the love of her life and bent both knees up, spreading her hips out wide for her. “I love you.”

“I love you too” Ali grinned lasciviously as she brought her lips back to Ashlyn’s entrance with a long hum. “Mmmmmmmm...” She swirled her tongue around the other pair of lips she loved so much and then sucked everything she could into her mouth. She slid her mouth up and down through her keeper’s folds, sucking the whole time while Ashlyn reached down and held the back of her head, gently running her long fingers through the soft brunette locks.

“Oh yeah, mmmmm, that’s so good...” she moaned softly as she used her free hand to prop her head up on both pillows so she could watch her wife work her magic. 

Ali reached up and caressed the blonde’s chest, running her fingertips along the center of her collarbone and then trailing them gently down to her belly, over the practical, black nursing bra that she still wore. She closed her eyes and pushed her strong tongue inside her keeper’s hot center, feeling her own core twitch when another rush of Ashlyn’s passion hit her tongue. God she wanted to spend hours eating this fucking goddess out and bringing her to orgasm after orgasm after orgasm. That was a luxury they couldn’t count on anymore. Sure, it happened every once in a while, but, more often than not, they were interrupted by a baby’s cry or a toddler’s small voice before they had spent more than thirty minutes together. But they learned. Now they always started their sexy times with a fast, urgent orgasm each before trying for anything more. This tryst on the bathroom floor was no different. The brunette said a silent prayer that she would get the chance to spend more time with her face buried between Ashlyn’s long legs but, for now, she enjoyed two more deep thrusts with her hot tongue and then moved her mouth up to play with the blonde’s clit.

“God I could eat you up all night long” she groaned, her lips still touching her wife’s sensitive nub as she spoke and sending jolts of pleasure right to the keeper’s core. “Fuck, you’re delicious” she flicked Ashlyn’s clit with her tongue and pressed down on her hips with her left forearm while pushing two fingers into her dripping pussy.

“Jesus Al...oh fuck that’s it...yesss...” the blonde murmured, doing her best to be quiet as her whole body felt like it had just come alive under her wife’s skilled touch. “I need you baby...please...”

The begging always did it for Ali. It wasn’t the actual words as much as it was the tone of her strong keeper’s pleading voice. Whatever plans the brunette had always fell by the wayside as soon as her gorgeous wife started begging her.

“I’m right here” she moved her head up a few inches to lick the pale silvery stretchmarks that spread across Ashlyn’s stomach. They were thin and looked like a delicate spider’s web covering her belly button in a four-inch radius, the bottom of it stopping just above her c-section scar. The whole roughly-circular pattern took up about eight inches. Ashlyn couldn’t have designed a better, more meaningful tattoo if she had tried and this new body art moved the brunette more than almost all of the other tattoos on her body combined. “I’m gonna take care of you babe, don’t you worry” she purred out as she started pumping her right arm faster and faster. 

Ashlyn pushed the brunette’s head back down towards her clit and Ali chuckled, low in her throat, as she began lapping at her wife’s sensitive button again.

“Unnnhhhh, fuck...oh yeah...” the blonde moaned again as she used her free hand to play with her own nipples through her bra.

Ali picked up the pace of her thrusting, loving the sexy sounds coming from between Ashlyn’s legs, and nibbled on the inside of her wife’s thigh. The blonde hissed in pleasure and moaned again when Ali moved her left hand to her keeper’s clit and started rubbing it with a purpose. Ashlyn was close and she knew it. 

“Goddamn you’re sexy” the brunette husked out, completely turned on at the sight, smell and sound of her girl. “Fuck me” she mumbled and swallowed hard as her eyes got even darker and her own core got even wetter while she pumped and rubbed Ashlyn towards her release. 

“Oh, oh, oh...”

“Shhhhhhh” Ali hushed when her wife’s exultations got too loud. She bit down harder on the inside of her keeper’s toned thigh and smiled when she felt it tremble beneath her lips as she soothed the bite.

“Fuck!” Ashlyn cried out in a strangled voice as she covered her own mouth with her arm, trying desperately to be quiet.

“Come for me babe” the brunette encouraged as she felt Ashlyn’s walls start to clamp down on her fingers as they thrusted in and out at a rapid pace. She was going hard and fast and as deep as she could, working up a sweat while she stroked her wife. “I want you” she grunted under the effort, “all over my hands and then I’m gonna lick every drop...”

Before Ali could even finish her seductive promise, Ashlyn’s body tensed up and completely stilled for a couple of seconds. Her head was pressed back against the pillows, turned to one side with her face buried in her bicep to try and keep quiet. She used her free hand to hold and play with her breasts through the nursing bra and her whole body began to shake violently as she came hard. Her passion gushed, drowning Ali’s hands in her sweet juices and the brunette bent her head down and started licking them up as she slowed her right hand and removed her left hand from Ashlyn’s oversensitive clit.

“Ali!!” the keeper’s muffled cry worked its way around her strong arm as the orgasm ripped through her body. Her legs twitched and her stomach muscles contracted, lifting the top half of her body up off the blanket a few inches. “Fuck...” she panted out a string of expletives and other words Ali couldn’t understand because of the arm over her mouth.

“Mmmmmmmm” Ali moaned softly as she continued to lick her wife’s drenched pussy lips, sucking up everything she could before she felt Ashlyn’s strong arms pulling her up.

“Come here” she urged as she guided her beautiful brunette up onto her chest and into a passionate kiss. It didn’t last long because they were both out of breath.

“Not too bad for a quickie on the bathroom floor” Ali smirked as she slid her aching clit and throbbing core over and onto her keeper’s left thigh, pressing them hard against the strong muscle there.

“Amazing” Ashlyn panted again and grinned. She opened her eyes and wrapped her arms around Ali’s back and roamed her hands down to her supple ass. The way she was already grinding on her thigh was making the keeper’s pulse increase again. “Christ, you’re fucking hot” she grunted out as Ali sat up and started to really ride her thigh.

“I need your mouth” she gasped out as a wave of passion shot through her body when Ashlyn lifted her thigh just a bit to give her more resistance.

She didn’t have to finish her request. The blonde sat up and sucked one of Ali’s perfect breasts into her mouth and felt the nipple harden almost instantly against her tongue.

“Oh Jesus” Ali groaned hoarsely. “I’m gonna come...”

Ashlyn moved her right hand between Ali’s legs and shoved two fingers inside her pulsing center, never taking her lips away from the sweet flesh of her breast.

“Oh yeah...mmmmmmm...fuck me good” Ali closed her eyes and took her weight off of Ashlyn’s thigh, supporting herself on her knees and shifting over between her wife’s legs a little bit so her keeper had more room to work. “God, yes...”

Ashlyn flicked her tongue against the stiff nipple and then moved her mouth to Ali’s other breast as she brought her left hand over and started rubbing the brunette’s clit with her strong fingers. She could feel Ali’s pussy grabbing at her fingers and squeezing tight. The brunette wasn’t kidding. She was seconds away from her release.

“Come on baby” the blonde mumbled around the breast in her mouth. “Come get it.”

It didn’t take more than another two minutes of thrusting and rubbing and sucking before Ali came just as hard as Ashlyn had a few minutes earlier. The brunette’s body collapsed down on top of her keeper’s and shook from head to toe as the orgasm swept over her. She buried her face in Ashlyn’s neck as a torrent of words and sounds left her mouth in a rush, finally devolving into a low, guttural groan.

“Oh my God Ashlyn” she gasped between aftershocks and held her keeper tight. “Wow.”

Ashlyn chuckled softly, wrapped both arms around her wife’s back and held her close as she kissed her brunette head. She didn’t care that her breasts were sore. She didn’t care that her back hurt from lying on the stupid bathroom floor. She didn’t care that she had barely gotten to touch her gorgeous wife in one of the quickest quickies she could remember. All that mattered in that moment was that the other half of her heart, the one that beat in Ali’s chest, was as close as possible to her own, pounding in her own body. It was these moments where Ashlyn truly felt like their bodies could fuse together and become one, just like their one beating heart. It didn’t matter if they had been lucky enough to spend hours having sex or if it had been one of their urgent fucks. As long as they could get to this point, this melding point where they breathed and existed as one, nothing else mattered.


	2. Vacation from Vacation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 6 isn't finished yet, but I'm far enough along so I feel comfortable posting a chapter a night.

The second week of their January vacation was much more relaxed and laid back. They stayed at Carol and Tammye’s beach house in Melbourne Beach and didn’t do much of anything except play with the kids at the beach and in the ocean. Ashlyn was so happy that Ali and the other planners had worked it out this way instead of starting with this part of the vacation and then going to Disney World. Truthfully, they all needed a vacation from their vacation. It wasn’t that they didn’t have an incredible time at Disney World, they all really really did. It was just that it was such a marathon of doing things. And nothing was easy to do when you had to plan for and pack for and carry around little kids. The second week at the beach house was like heaven compared to Disney World, at least to the grown-ups. The kids, of course, missed Mickey Mouse and fireworks every night and getting all the rules they had ever known bent because it was a very special week in a very special place. They weren’t dumb. They knew they had it very good at Disney.

The most exciting thing that happened during their week at the beach house was that little Lily girl finally figured out how to crawl. Ashlyn was convinced it was because she was sick and tired of everybody getting up and leaving her, even Dodge. Ali thought she had been so excited and stimulated by their week at Disney that she finally got motivated to give it a whirl. Whomever was right, their fourth child was now mobile and life had gotten even more exciting for them all. Tammye cautioned them not to compare the stats for their kids. She reminded them what they already knew – no two kids were the same and they all developed differently. Drew and Dodge had both crawled at 7 months, Drew at the end of his 7th month and Dodge at the beginning of his, and Josie hadn’t crawled until she was 9 months old. Lily was right in the middle of them at 8 months, almost to the day. Knowing that Lily couldn’t move from wherever they put her had been a crutch they were leaning on as they adjusted to Dodge and his extreme mobility. They fully expected him to start walking at any moment, even though that was absurd. Babies didn’t start to walk until they were at least a year old, usually. But nothing about Dodge’s advanced development, at least when it came to physical things, had been usual. Drew took his first steps at 14 months. Josie took hers at 16 months, but she was a little behind the curve as she had been with crawling, especially physically, because of her unusually challenging start to life. For all Ali and Ashlyn knew, Lily would walk before Dodge did. But they both knew that wasn’t really going to happen. Dodge was crazy strong and was already standing, albeit only for short periods of time. He had the strength but he lacked the motor skills and balance to get his legs to move. 

The second most exciting thing that happened that week was an accomplishment of Ali’s that the whole family could appreciate. Chris and Ashlyn Harris came bursting into the beach house through the garage door into the kitchen with bright, ebullient faces.

“She did it!” Ashlyn shouted excitedly, unable to contain her enthusiasm.

“Yeah she did!” Chris chimed in, equally excited. “More than once too!”

Tammye and Carol looked from one sibling to the other and then back again as they sat at the kitchen table. Tammye was just wiping spit up off of Dodge’s chin after a messy burp. Carol was feeding Lily her post-afternoon nap bottle. Josie was still asleep, enjoying her longer naptime, and Drew ran in from the living room when he heard all the commotion. He skidded to a halt in front of Ashlyn and Chris.

“Where’s Mommy?” he asked adorably, raising his hands palm-up and shrugging his shoulders.

Just as Ali stepped through the doorway Chris’ loud, announcer voice boomed through the room.

“Here she is ladies and gentlemen, the Space Coast’s hottest new surfing phenom...Ali ‘it only took me eight years’ Krieger!”

“How about a warm round of applause for the little lady?” Ashlyn added and started clapping loudly for her wife who just rolled her eyes as she pulled the door shut behind her.

Everybody with free hands clapped and hooted and hollered for the brunette who smiled shyly and blushed. Drew threw his arms around her thighs and squeezed her tightly.

“Yayyyy Mommy!!” he yelled and started jumping up and down, not letting go of her legs and pulling her into his rhythm as she waved to her adoring fans with one hand and held the back of her son’s head with the other.

Dodge grinned and squealed with excitement as he crawled quickly to Ali’s bare feet. He sat on his bum next to her and clapped his hands, doing his best to participate in the celebration.

“Congratulations honey” Carol added with a smile as she lifted Lily to burp her. “How did it feel?”

Ali got down on her knees to hug her two boys and receive kisses and pats in return.

“It felt awesome” she answered with a huge grin. “It took me a long time but I finally did it” she looked at her kids. “Now I just hope I can do it again in a couple of days and that this wasn’t just a fluke” she chuckled.

“Ashlyn Michelle Krieger and Christopher Ryan Harris are you standing in here with sand all over your feet?!” Tammye’s stern voice shot across the kitchen to her two grown children. “You’d better not be...” she warned and tilted her head as she quirked an eyebrow in their direction. “Don’t tell me the only one with sense enough to clean off their feet before coming into this house is Ali” she continued as the two siblings quickly ducked back out into the garage. “And she wasn’t even raised in the sand for God’s sake. What’s the matter with you two?” she winked at the brunette as she stood up to take the empty bottles to the kitchen sink.

“What’s the rule guys?” Ali asked her two sons and quirked her own eyebrow.

“Ummm...” Drew started, eager to get the answer out first even though he knew Dodge couldn’t talk yet. “No sandy feet in the house!”

“Good boy Drew” Ali patted his head as she sat on the kitchen floor and let Dodge climb up her legs and into her lap. “Did you remember to clean off your feet before you came into the house after the beach this afternoon?”

“I did. I did” Drew answered and turned to look at Carol for confirmation, as did Ali.

“He did” Carol agreed. “He did a very good job” she praised him as she set Lily down on the kitchen floor. “So can we officially call you a surfer now?”

“Oh I don’t think so” the brunette giggled as Chris and Ashlyn came back into the house again. Ashlyn walked to the cleaning closet and got the vacuum out to clean up the sand in the kitchen while Chris scooped Drew up into a big bear hug. Ali looked up at him and asked, “What’s the rule on that anyway guys?”

“If you love it and you can stay up then you’re a surfer” Chris answered simply. “She really did great though” the sincere look on his face made Ali blush again. “It’s hard to get good at it when you don’t get to do it very often. All it takes is practice...”

“And eight years” Ashlyn teased as she came back into the room with the vacuum. “Although, to be fair, half the time we’ve been down here she’s been pregnant or breastfeeding so we have to cut her a ton of slack” she defended her wife and earned a sweet smile back in return.

“Thanks babe. And I had a great teacher too” the brunette added as Lily joined her twin brother on her mommy’s lap, eager to get playtime started.

“Here” Ashlyn pushed the vacuum at her brother. “That reminds me, I really need to pump.”

Chris had opened his mouth to protest but when he heard his sister’s reason he knew to just keep it shut and clean up their mess. Pregnant and breastfeeding women always won. It was just the rule and everybody knew it.

“Well I’m proud of you honey” Tammye smiled at her daughter-in-law as she came back through the kitchen. “You never gave up, even though it took you a long time. That’s so important.”

“Thanks Gigi” Ali returned her smile. “Now what game are we going to play outside?” she asked her three children, only one of whom could actually answer her. “I’m going to go get miss Josie up and then we’ll go out...”

“Slippy slide!” Drew yelled, making Chris wince as he held him. “Slippy slide! Gigi said we could!”

“Well alright then” the brunette chuckled as she stood up. “Slip ‘n Slide it is. Let’s get our bathing suits on and do this thing.”

//

Ashlyn sat at the kitchen table looking out the sliding glass door into the dark beach and ocean. The sky was overcast and the moon was hidden so it was hard to see past the reflection of the light from the kitchen appliances at the other side of the room behind her. Lily happily and sleepily nursed while her mama tried to locate the horizon with her own tired eyes.

“Uh-oh, somebody didn’t make it through the night” Tammye commented softly as she entered the dark kitchen at 4:15am. “Everything ok?” she asked as she filled a glass with water and shuffled over to join her daughter and granddaughter at the kitchen table.

“We’re fine” Ashlyn replied quietly, trying to keep the nighttime mood in effect so Lily would go back to sleep as soon as she was finished nursing. “Did we wake you up?”

“Oh, no” Tammye sighed as she sat down and pulled a bottle of Tylenol out of the pocket of her thin robe. “Couldn’t sleep” she explained vaguely as she tried to get the cap off of the bottle and winced.

“Here mom, let me” the keeper reached over and took the medium sized bottle from the older woman. “Is it lined up?” she asked, wanting to make sure the safety cap was lined up with the release point on the mouth of the pill bottle, and Tammye nodded. Ashlyn held the bottle in her free hand and pushed the lid up with her strong thumb, popping it free and watching it land on the kitchen table in front of her. “Here you go” she handed the bottle back to her mother and watched with concern as she struggled to shake out some of the pills.

Tammye had osteoarthritis, which is the most common form of arthritis, just like her mother before her. It was a joint disease that resulted in the breakdown of joint cartilage and the underlying bone. The symptoms were joint pain and stiffness and sometimes even swelling and decreased range of motion if it was severe enough. It was the kind of arthritis that made the tips of old peoples’ fingers bend and curve to the side sometimes. Tammye had first been officially diagnosed about ten years ago, when she was 51 years old. It was only her hands that were affected by the disease, thankfully. But, if she were like her mother – Grandma Lilian, then she could expect it to develop in her lower back and knees too. It was an inherited disease and genetics told Ashlyn that she was probably going to follow in her mother and grandmother’s footsteps. Tammye had always told her daughter that she had Grandma Lilian’s hands and meant it only in good ways. They were good, big, strong, nimble, hard-working fingers that had served Grandma Lilian well for decades as the best seamstress in all of Gloucester. And they had helped Ashlyn become and stay one of the most talented goalkeepers in the NWSL for many years. They had also brought Ali countless hours of pleasure but that had certainly not been part of what Tammye had meant – at least not until she started having sex with Carol and learned to appreciate long, strong fingers for different reasons.

The blonde had watched her mother struggle increasingly with the disease over the years, especially the last three or four. If her joint pain was bad then she couldn’t use her hands for much of anything until the pain subsided some. And once it did and she regained the use of her fingers, whatever it was that she did with them next – open a jar of olives, apply her make-up, type on a keyboard, slice a lemon, brush her teeth, would invariably cause the pain to come back. The best treatment was exercise and motion, but there weren’t a lot of exercises for your fingers. It made sense if you had it in your lower back or your knees – you could go swimming and it would loosen things up. But the fingers were the hardest place to treat. Tylenol, acetaminophen, was the go-to option for pain-relief but it didn’t always work well if the pain was severe. The next level of pain medicine had a few choices but they each had a side effect that gave Tammye pause. Not to mention her history of addiction making her nervous about taking any sort of prescription pain medicine.

Ashlyn watched her mother finally just pour out a bunch of pills onto the table top and pick two out of the pile. She could tell by the look on Tammye’s face that she was in pain.

“Pretty bad tonight huh?” she asked carefully. Tammye didn’t like to talk about it and she didn’t want anybody’s pity. She also, somewhere deep down inside, felt like she deserved to suffer for being such a terrible mother and person when she had been a drunk addict. “That’s why you couldn’t sleep?”

“Yep” the older woman nodded as she swallowed the first pill with a big drink of water.

“Don’t they have the type of bottles with the easy open caps now?” Ashlyn watched her mother swallow the second pill and close her eyes for a few seconds.

“They do, but we have the grandkids around so much that it’s not worth the risk” she replied, still keeping her voice low. “If I have trouble I wake Carol up” she smiled, despite the pain. “She’s so good to me” Tammye looked up shyly at her daughter.

“It’s my favorite thing about her” the blonde smiled back sincerely. They were quiet for another minute, the only sounds coming from Lily as she gurgled and sighed and breathed at her mother’s breast. “Does the Tylenol help?”

“A little bit. Sometimes a lot. It depends on how bad the pain is” Tammye explained. “It’s pretty bad tonight so I don’t know...” she laid her hands flat on the table and looked at them sadly. “We’ll see I guess.”

“Would icing them help?”

“I’m not sure” she shrugged. “It’s not like rheumatoid arthritis where the joints get inflamed and warm, thank God” she chuckled. “I read once that RA feels like your knuckles are on fire from the inside. No thank you.”

“What about prescription meds? I mean, I know you don’t want to take them and I get it” she paused, knowing she was going down a road that always made her mother uncomfortable and embarrassed. “But living in so much pain might drive you to other forms of numbing the pain anyway, right?”

Tammye looked at her daughter’s worried face and the momentary flash of anger she felt dissipated when she saw the genuine concern in the tired hazel eyes there. She knew Ashlyn was only trying to help. She also knew Ashlyn wasn’t one to pussyfoot around things. She called a spade a spade as nicely as possibly, but she still called a spade a spade. 

“Well, aside from the terrifying idea of getting hooked on pain pills, the two choices both have some scary side effects that I’m not interested in going through unless I absolutely have to” the older woman replied, choosing to let her daughter’s comment about drinking again to help deal with the pain slide for the moment.

“Like what?” the keeper held Lily up against her shoulder and started patting her back to get her to burp but she never took her eyes off of her mother. She rarely got to talk to her about these things and she didn’t want to let the opportunity go by without taking advantage. “If you don’t mind me asking.”

“Of course I don’t mind honey” Tammye half-smiled, the pain in her hands still powerful. “I hope like hell I’m wrong, but I’m afraid you might have to deal with this too someday. I’m so sorry about that...”

“Mom” Ashlyn shook her head. “Don’t be ridiculous. It’s not your fault. I’m just as sorry that you’re going through it too.”

“One of the medicines has been known to cause severe gastro-intestinal bleeding.” Tammye started to try and push the pills on the table back into the bottle. “And the other greatly increases your chances of heart disease – specifically heart attack.” 

“Jesus” the keeper exhaled. “Just leave those” she nodded at the pills as Lily burped. “I’ll get them in a minute.” She saw the worry in her mother’s eyes. “It’s just us, nobody else to worry about getting into them.”

“Give me her and you can do it right now” she suggested as she opened her arms for her granddaughter.

“Won’t it bother your hands?”

“No, I’ll hold her with my arms for a few minutes while you put those away and then you can take her again” she waved a hand in front of her, inviting Ashlyn to bring the baby to her. “I won’t drop her, I promise. If I thought it was even a possibility I wouldn’t suggest it.”

“No, I’m not afraid of that” the keeper smiled sadly at her mother. She knew her mother would give her life for one of her grandkids and there was no way she would drop Lily. “I’m afraid she’ll hurt you, your fingers.”

“Well, if it was Destructo-boy” Tammye chuckled as she used the family nickname for Dodge, “I might be a little concerned. But she’s practically back to sleep. I’m not worried about it. Come on now, hurry up so you can go back to sleep too.”

Ashlyn set her baby girl gently in her own mother’s arms and then slid all of the pills off the edge of the table top into the bottle. She left the lid off initially but Tammye told her to put it on and move the cap so it wasn’t lined up anymore.

“If I need help again I’ll get Carol” she assured. “I promise.”

“Do you need me to...”

“Ashlyn, I’m ok” she cut her off and let her take Lily back after softly kissing the baby’s forehead. “I appreciate you trying to help, really honey, I do. But I’m ok.”

//

Saturday, the day before they were flying back to Boston, Ashlyn woke her wife up early, peppering her face with soft, warm kisses at 6:45am. They were in the basement of the beach house where they always stayed. There were three bedrooms and two full bathrooms in the large, finished basement area. It was basically like a second floor for a normal house, except it was below grade on the front with a sliding door that opened onto the beach in the back. The middle bedroom had two sets of bunk beds in it, but for now, Drew slept there on a bottom bunk with Dodge set up in a portable crib on the other side of the room. Josie was in the bedroom right next door, right in the middle of the double bed, with Lily in her own portable crib. Ali and Ashlyn took the bedroom on the other side of the small common area where the sliding door was. There was a bathroom at each end of the basement level.

It wasn’t much earlier than they normally woke up, typically they all ate breakfast, or nursed, at 7am, but Ashlyn wanted to get out of the beach house before the kids were up so they couldn’t slow them down. She had cleared her plan with her mother and Carol the night before and they all agreed they were out of days and today was definitely the day to do it.

“Hey, beautiful...” the keeper said softly near her wife’s ear and successfully dodged the hand that came up to sleepily brush the annoyance away. Ashlyn chuckled and pulled the covers off of her sleeping beauty and then straddled her hips. “Time to get up my queen” she said a little louder and got ready to dodge another angry body part if the need arose.

“What’s going on?” Ali croaked out in her raspy morning voice. She squinted up at her wife and rubbed her face with one hand while pushing Ashlyn’s knee back with her other hand. “Get off my bladder babe.”

The blonde scooched back a few inches so she was more on Ali’s thighs and continued trying to wake her up.

“Come on, you need to get up and pee real quick so we can get out of here before the kids are up” she rubbed Ali’s arm that had pushed her knee. “And put a sweatshirt on, it’s chilly out.”

“What?” the brunette squinted again, yawned and then stretched. “Where are we going?”

Ashlyn had a flashback to the time she woke Ali up at Gram’s house during her very first visit to Satellite Beach. They were supposed to go surfing and the keeper had tried to wake her up before dawn. They were just friends then and she certainly hadn’t straddled her. But she remembered exactly how it felt when she watched the beautiful brunette stretch. Ashlyn had thought she was going to burst into flames right there on the edge of Chris’ old bed when Ali caught her staring at her stiff nipple through her sleep t-shirt after a stretch just like that one. 

“Hel-looo?” Ali broke through the sweet déjà vu. 

“Just...come on” the keeper encouraged shyly as she got off the bed. She was already dressed and had already pumped her milk up in the kitchen. “Please baby. We’re going to miss our chance unless we leave, like, right now.”

“Ok, ok” she yawned again and sat up. Ashlyn moved to help her up, pulling a Breakers hooded sweatshirt over her head and surprising the brunette. “Oh!” Ali yelped and let her keeper lead her to the bathroom right outside in the hall. “I’m up Ash. I’m up. I got it.”

The keeper was back before Ali had even finished peeing, letting herself into the bathroom and kneeling in front of her wife as she sat on the toilet.

“Babe, what are you...”

“Just, let me help you or we’ll never make it out” she said quietly as she pulled Ali’s pajama pants off of her legs and replaced them with a pair of clean panties. “I can already hear somebody up” she put the brunette’s feet, one at a time, into the legs of the sweatpants for her before doing the same thing with socks and sneakers.

Ali couldn’t help but smile at her adorable keeper. She was trying so hard to pull this off. Whatever this was. The brunette flushed the toilet stood up and washed her hands as quickly as she could. When she reached for her toothbrush the blonde tugged on her arm.

“Later. Let’s go.”

“Ashlyn, I’m not going anywhere without coffee...”

“Baby, pleeeeaassse...” she whined, still tugging her wife by the hand towards the bathroom door. “If you would just do the one thing I’m asking you to do everything else is already taken care of.” It was impossible to hide the exasperation in her voice. “God” she sighed.

Ashlyn paused as she opened the bathroom door a crack to make sure the hall was clear. She waited a few seconds just to be extra safe and then led her wife the short distance down the hall to the common area near the stairs up to the main level of the house. They turned left and picked up their pace as they headed for the sliding door out to the beach. Ashlyn bent down and grabbed her own sneakers that were just inside the door and then completed their escape, closing the sliding door behind them and moving to the side, out of view. It was still dark out so they didn’t really need to hide anymore but better safe than sorry. Ali’s heart melted when she saw the stuffed backpack and the heavy, folded up beach blankets waiting there for them. Ashlyn tugged her sneakers on, hoisted the backpack over her shoulder and carried both big blankets under her arm as she reached back to take Ali’s hand. 

“Ready?” she asked as she looked at the brunette’s face for the first time since the bathroom.

She saw a sleepy looking face that was full of love and gratitude, all wrapped up in a soft smile.

“Yeah, I’m ready” Ali closed the distance between them and gave her wife a sweet kiss. “I love you.”

Ashlyn flashed her a dimpled grin in return, let her carry one of the blankets, and led her down to the beach. It was 7:05am and, after a short walk directly towards the ocean, they were set up on one of the blankets and enjoying coffee from the thermos Ashlyn had packed in the backpack. It was chilly and they huddled together for warmth, Ali sitting between her wife’s legs with her back to Ashlyn’s front. The keeper pulled the second blanket up around her shoulders to block the wind as they waited for the sunrise to bring them light and warmth.

“When was the last time we watched the sunrise together?” Ali turned her head and asked her sweet wife as they drank their coffee and waited.

Ashlyn kissed the side of her head, dark brown hair gathered at the back of her neck in a low bun to combat the wind, as she thought about the question. 

“I couldn’t remember” she admitted sheepishly, loving the way Ali was nuzzling into her neck. “That’s why I knew it was time.”

“Your mom and Carol are angels” the brunette said appreciatively as she turned back to look at the horizon that was just starting to show the first signs of what was to come.

“I told them they could send the kids down once they had eaten, if they wanted. So don’t be surprised if we get company” the keeper chuckled.

“Oh I’d love that” Ali turned and looked over Ashlyn’s shoulder to see the beach house. The lights were on in the kitchen and the brunette pictured Drew and Josie sitting at the table eating their breakfast while Carol and Tammye fed the babies their morning bottles. She tilted her head up and waited for her keeper to connect their lips. “How is it possible to miss them so much when they’re not with us?”

“I know, right?” Ashlyn chuckled. “And then I practically bit your head off this morning just so we could get away from them” she sighed and shook her head sadly.

“No, Ash...” Ali squeezed Ashlyn’s arm and then turned her torso sideways so her wife could see her face. “I’m sorry I was such a brat. I should have just trusted you. I know better than to doubt you. I was just tired...”

“It’s ok baby, I know” the keeper gave her wife another kiss and when she opened her eyes she could see the beginnings of the sunrise creeping up over the horizon. “Look” she nodded towards the ocean.

At 7:15am, as promised, the sun started a new day and lit up the morning sky with incredibly vibrant colors. The whole glorious show only took about 5 minutes but they sat there mesmerized, soaking up every second of it in a peaceful silence. The only sounds were the ocean and the gulls and the wind. It was blissful and felt like it took a lot longer than 5 minutes. 

“Mama! Mommy!” Drew’s little voice rang out a few minutes later.

They both turned to see their son running full speed through the sand towards them. Carol was waving from the deck and Ashlyn waved back and grinned. Josie was on her way too, but moving much more slowly on her much shorter legs.

“Should I go get her?” Ashlyn asked, watching the redhead trudge through the sand with her short little legs, ready to jump up and help her.

“She can do it” Ali replied knowingly, her eyes locked on their little one.

“Why...” Drew started but had to stop so he could catch his breath after his long run down the beach. He hugged Ashlyn hard from behind and grinned at Ali as he took a minute. “Why are you here?” he tilted his head and shivered, dressed only in his pajamas.

“Come sit under the blanket with us buddy” Ali encouraged when she saw the shiver. She opened her arms and welcomed him into the safe, warm cuddle blanket and kissed his head three times as she hugged him. “We were watching the sunrise” she pointed to the horizon.

“Why?” the boy asked, confused.

“Because it’s beautiful” Ashlyn answered and ruffled his hair with one of her long arms as she turned back again to watch Josie.

When she finally got to the blanket and Ashlyn’s outstretched arms, Josie had tears streaming down her face. Ali knew they were tears mostly of frustration. She hadn’t fallen and it hadn’t been that great of a distance to cause her any true discomfort or distress. She was ticked off that she couldn’t get there as fast as her big brother. The brunette knew the feeling and was surprised that Ashlyn hadn’t recognized it too. They had both experienced the same thing trying to keep up with their big brothers when they were Josie’s age.

“You did it!” Ali praised her daughter and gave her a bright smile and a kiss once Ashlyn had nestled her into their cozy little blanket cave. She brushed the tears off of the little girl’s face and cupped her chin, squeezing her cheeks gently when she was done. “Great job Josie.”

The four of them sat there and enjoyed the quiet and the colorful sky and the fresh ocean air for another twenty minutes until the kids were so bored that they made it no fun anymore. Ashlyn took one more big deep breath and then released the kids from the blanket cave so they could scamper across the sand.

“Don’t go too far” Ali called after them. “And stay out of the water. It’s too cold right now.” It had warmed up considerably in the half hour since the sun had been up and they knew the kids would be ok even though they were just in their jammies still. “Let’s just head back up to the house now guys” the brunette changed her mind as she watched Drew make a bee-line for the ocean. That boy loved the water. “Drew! Back to the house!” she yelled.

Ashlyn was just about to get up and get him when he stopped and turned around to look at the two women. He tilted his head and pouted his lips and gave them his best sad-face to try and get them to relent.

“You heard your mother” Ashlyn nodded her head back towards the house as Ali leaned back into her chest again with a contented sigh. “Get going now.” 

He stomped his foot into the hard sand and started marching back up towards them and past them and up to the house. Josie had already started back, thrilled at the idea that she might beat her big brother to their destination for a change. Ashlyn watched the frown on his face as he trudged past them and tried hard not to giggle. He was a beautiful boy and his pouty lips made him look even more like his brunette mother at that moment. 

“Thank you buddy” Ali said just after he passed their blanket. “We can play on the beach in a little while, once it’s warmer. I promise.”

They spent two more minutes enjoying their special sunrise morning and then got up to go inside and have their own breakfast and check on the twins. They quickly folded the blankets and gathered up the thermos and shared a quick but sweet kiss and embrace before holding hands and walking towards the beach house. They could see little Josie making good progress. She was about four feet away from the three steps up to the deck. Drew was still angry and was kicking sand as he walked. He had caught up to Josie and was only a few feet behind her, so when he kicked the sand it hit her in the back.

“Stop kicking sand at your sister!” Ali called out as she shook her head.

“He’s so mad we made him come back inside” Ashlyn chuckled under her breath so only Ali could hear.

He stomped his foot again and clenched his fists before walking quickly up behind Josie and pushing her hard. She fell forward, thankfully missing the steps to the deck which were just barely out of range, and ended up face down in the sand, screaming.

“Andrew Krieger!” the brunette yelled as she dropped Ashlyn’s hand and jogged towards the children. “Stop right there” she commanded, approaching them quickly. 

She knelt down and helped Josie to sit up as Tammye came out onto the deck in case they needed help. She and Carol had seen the push and fall from the kitchen. Josie’s face was covered with sand. It was everywhere – in her mouth, up her nose, in both of her eyes which she was rubbing as she bawled.

“Don’t rub them sweetie, let’s get them rinsed out...” Ali looked up at Tammye, but Ashlyn was at her side with a bottle of water from the backpack already out and uncapped.

“Here little one...let’s rinse the sand out of your eyes” the keeper soothed. “This is just water, no soap” she explained as she started to pour the bottled water onto her face.

She and Ali worked together to get the sand out of her red eyes and Drew started to climb the steps up to the deck.

“You come over here young man” Ashlyn instructed in a firm voice.

Drew knew he was in trouble as soon as he heard ‘young man’ come out of his mama’s mouth. She never said that unless she was really mad at him. He turned and slowly came over to the scene of his offense, standing awkwardly a foot away from Ali who was the closest to him. Josie had stopped crying and was now whining and fussing about having water poured over her face. She tried to push Ali’s hands away as they worked to remove the sand from the corners of her eyes.

“Ow Mommy” she whimpered.

“I know love. I’m sorry” the brunette cooed. “We’re almost done.”

“Just because you’re upset with me or Mommy for something, there’s no reason to take it out on your sister, or anybody else for that matter” Ashlyn’s voice was stern as she stood with her hands on her hips, empty water bottle on the sand between her feet. “I can’t believe you did that Drew” she shook her head at him. “You know better than that and I’m really disappointed that you pushed your sister.” Ashlyn’s heart almost broke when she saw his lower lip quiver right before he dropped his chin to his chest as he heard her words. “If you’re angry you come and tell one of us with your words and we’ll talk about it. You know this stuff buddy. You’re a big boy now and you can’t just take out your frustration on other people.”

“I’m sorry mama” he whined.

“You need to apologize to your sister” Ashlyn pointed at the redhead and watched her son take a step closer to Josie and sigh heavily.

“Sorry JoJo” he said with a fair amount of attitude as he stepped closer to his sister who was now soaked from head to foot down the front of her pajamas which were also covered in sand. 

Ali had managed to get most of the sand off of Josie’s face and out of her eyes so they weren’t hurting her anymore. The brunette knelt between her two oldest children trying to remember the peace and serenity of the sunrise that had surrounded them less than thirty minutes earlier. It was a good thing she hadn’t closed her eyes to help her visualize it because then she wouldn’t have been able to stop Josie from hitting her brother in the face. The brunette just managed to grab her daughter’s left hand as it swung towards Drew’s face.

“No Josie” she scolded firmly. “We don’t hit.”

The truth was, both Ashlyn and Ali would have clocked their brothers for doing what Drew had done but they couldn’t just let her hit him like that right in front of them both. Ali looked up at her wife who rolled her eyes and tried hard not to smile. They both loved their feisty little girl so much, but they knew they were going to have a hard time teaching her how to control her powerful emotions as she got older. The brunette turned her attention to brushing the sand off of her daughter and then gave up and just took her pajamas all the way off of her.

“Who’s ready to finish their breakfast now?” Tammye asked as she walked across the deck to the top of the three deck stairs. She had witnessed the whole thing and thought now was a good time for a change. Drew had apologized. Josie had let him know just how she felt about what he had done. And they were all hungry. “You two must be hungry too” Tammye looked at Ashlyn and Ali and smiled warmly. “Did you have a nice sunrise?”

“Yeah mom” Ashlyn returned her smile and picked up her backpack and the blankets before climbing the stairs behind Drew. “Thanks again for holding down the fort. I really appreciate it” she kissed her mother’s cheek. 

“Anytime honey” Tammye patted her daughter’s back and then bent over to take Josie’s hand as she cleared the top step and made her way towards the sliding glass door into the kitchen.

Ali watched them go as she got to her feet and brushed the sand off of her sweatpants. She turned around for another look at the ocean as she tried to memorize how their special morning had felt and sounded and smelled. She closed her eyes for a few seconds and took a deep breath, smiling without even realizing she was doing it. She and Ashlyn had enjoyed 45 minutes of alone time that morning, starting from when the keeper first woke her up. It hadn’t been a lot but it had meant a lot, to both of them. They were both making conscious efforts to carve out time for just themselves. It wasn’t easy but they knew it was important. Ali would cherish those 45 minutes until the next time they were able to escape again. But now, she couldn’t wait to crowd around the kitchen table with the five biggest pieces of her heart.


	3. Working Moms

No sooner had they arrived back at the big old house than the rest of busy January consumed them all. They flew home from Florida on Sunday the 14th and on Tuesday the 16th Ashlyn was in Boston shooting the Suburu minivan commercial for their national ad campaign. It was a two-day shoot because they wanted to show all four seasons in the ad so they had to create and use four different sets. Ashlyn did her work in the morning and then Ali brought Josie and Drew in after Drew was done with school in the mid-afternoon so they could do their parts. It was hard for the brunette to watch the hair and costume people work on her children, but she tried to be relaxed about it. Both kids seemed to be having a fun time, even shy Drew. Ashlyn and the director explained it as if it were a game, which was a brilliant move, and both kids understood it that way. When the director said ‘Go’ they started their game and ambled out of the minivan and then jogged off to Ali’s waiting arms off-camera. The camera shot was from the rear of the minivan with the back hatch open. That’s where Ashlyn addressed the audience after walking around from the driver’s side. The camera saw the back and sides of Drew and Josie inside the minivan as they got out of their seats and hopped out the sliding door behind the driver’s seat. Then the camera panned back a bit and caught them laughing and jogging into their house, presumably. The hardest part was getting them to do it at the right tempo. They, of course, went too fast the first ten times they did it. Ashlyn knew they were getting bored and, as the second hour went by, hungry. 

“Can’t you just slow them down with your magic camera and then dub their laughing in later?” she asked the director when he came over to ask her what else he could do to help get them to do what they needed.

It was more complicated than Ashlyn’s idea, but basically that’s what they ended up doing. Ali brought the kids back the next afternoon too, so they could shoot the same thing but on the two additional sets. The commercial turned out really cute and was one of Suburu’s highest rated ever. It was tough to compete with all of their dog family ads – not even Ashlyn was sure her commercial was cuter than those. But it was an absolute success and Suburu was more than pleased with the results, running the ads for three years straight. Ali had been pleased with the way the director handled the kids, and Ashlyn, and in general found the whole experience to be better than any other commercial shoot situation she had been a part of as an agent over the years. It was also an enormous paycheck for the keeper. Aside from her two big Nike campaigns, the one with Hilary and the Boston Marathon and the one with her new, edgier look that was going to be unveiled next month, the Suburu national commercial gig was the highest paying job she had ever had. 

Which was good because they now had four college funds and weddings to save for and Knight-Harris was turning a profit and in the black, but it wasn’t lucrative yet. It was still a young, growing company and most of the profit was being poured back into the company to make sure it had the correct infrastructure in place to allow it to keep growing. The more clients that wanted to sign with the company, the more agents Ali needed to hire. It was a wonderful problem to have, but they had agreed to sort of hold steady for a couple of years so they didn’t grow too fast and burn out. It made logical sense and was a sound business decision, but Ali, along with the other shareholders, had a really hard time turning clients away. It was just counterintuitive. It went against everything she had ever known from her sales and customer service background. She couldn’t do it. It had barely been a year and they were already outgrowing the addition to the building that had just been built. The brunette hired, with Jared’s help, a consultant to come in and help them streamline their operations. The industry, and world, were so much more electronic-based those days that it seemed unnecessary to keep adding physical space to the building that so many of their employees only visited once or twice a month sometimes, depending on their travel schedules. The consultant was smart and a fast learner and she quickly understood that there would always be a need for a physical center or hub for the operations aspect of K-H. The actual, physical contracts and other legal documents that had to be signed and notarized were never going to go away entirely. But instead of most of the agents having their own cubicle or even office, depending on tenure and revenue generated, they were going to work out of a modern-day bullpen. The offices and work spaces would be generalized and whichever agents happened to be in the building at any given time would occupy whichever office or work space they chose for the day. It seemed like a simple solution but it required changing a dozen different procedures in several different areas of the business. 

The consultant was going to be there, observing and learning, for six weeks starting at the beginning of February. Then she would go away for a couple of weeks and devise a plan that she would bring back to Ali and the other shareholders at the beginning of April. If everybody agreed on the proposed plan of attack they would begin implementing it right away. If there were problems with the proposal, they would re-work it and make the necessary changes. Ali was committed to keeping the company as efficient as possible. She knew it was one of the most important ways to keep any company healthy and profitable. She wasn’t willing to sacrifice the comfort or humanity of her employees though. The brunette was adamant about not making her co-workers feel like rats in a cage. The core principles she and Ashlyn had brought to the company when they founded it hadn’t changed. They still wanted to hire the right people and they still planned to treat them well. Ashlyn continued to go out of her way to make connections with everybody in the company, which was really difficult because she was busier than ever, even though she wasn’t travelling with a professional soccer team, and there were more employees than ever at K-H. Ali admired her wife and appreciated her efforts because they both knew it made a huge difference in terms of company morale and productivity. It was also just the decent thing to do.

Ashlyn was home for one day after the Suburu shoot in Boston and then flew down to North Carolina Friday morning to co-host the NWSL Draft later that night. The blonde knew she wasn’t going to get asked to do that gig every year. Pretty soon they would replace her with somebody else, probably someone who still actually played in the league. But until then she was going to do it and enjoy it. This year her co-host was Jessie Scarpa, another UNC alum who was a USWNT player as well as the captain of the NC Courage NWSL team. She was a 27 year old forward who was sort of a mixture of Alex Morgan’s fierce strength and skill and Christen Press’ dazzling technique and finesse. Ashlyn was looking forward to working with her. She was especially nervous this year because she hadn’t made the time to study up on the incoming draft class as much as she normally did. She spent the better part of her evenings that week cramming as if she was a student back at UNC again. 

“Honey you’re gonna do great” Ali assured her wife Thursday night as she came up the backstairs with the last basket of clean laundry for the night. It was already after 10pm and she knew her keeper’s flight required an 8am pick up from the car service to get her to the airport on time. “You should trust yourself and get a good night’s sleep tonight” the brunette stood next to Ashlyn who was sitting cross-legged on the bed with her laptop open in front of her. Ali leaned over and kissed the side of her head, right above her glasses, as it bent over the computer screen. “I hate when you leave after we spend a bunch of time together. It kills me” she commented sadly as she walked around to her side of the bed and dumped the clean laundry onto the bed so she could start folding it. “I miss you already.”

It took the keeper a minute but the somber tone in her wife’s voice finally penetrated her thoughts and made her look up. Her beautiful brunette looked tired and pensive and a little sad as she stood on the other side of the bed folding bath towels, hand towels and washcloths. Ashlyn knew her wife was right about putting her work away and she closed her laptop and put it on the shelf on her nightstand, leaning down and back up with a grunt. 

“I wish you could come with me” she replied as she moved closer to the middle of the bed and grabbed a towel to fold. “Whose idea was it to have more kids again?” she asked playfully and rolled her eyes.

“Yours” Ali giggled and smiled at her wife. “I wish I could go too. I’d love to hear more stories about you from all your old teammates.”

Since the draft was being held in North Carolina some of Ashlyn’s college teammates had organized a mini-reunion for the soccer team and some other close friends from school. The draft was Friday night and then the reunion was Saturday afternoon and evening. The joke was that they were all getting so old that they didn’t want to do a big night out at a club. They decided on a big cookout at Heather O’Reilly’s house instead. Whitney and Ryan were going, Jenn Tucker was going to be there along with the other two NWSL agents for their working weekend. Tobin Heath, Allie Long, Meghan Klingenberg, Crystal Dunn, Yael Averbuch, Lindsay Tarpley, Kealia Ohai, Cat Whitehill, Carla Overbeck, Tisha Venturini and a long list of other UNC players were all going to be there. There was even some talk of Mia Hamm and Kristine Lilly making the trip. Ashlyn had been looking forward to this weekend for months but knew she couldn’t go too crazy because she needed to be on a flight home early Sunday morning.

It was a busy weekend for the Kriegers, and it came after a busy week. Sunday was the MLS draft and Ali had to be in NYC with Tanner for his big day. The brunette had genuinely been surprised when her step-brother asked her to be his agent. Everybody thought he would be crazy not to have her represent him but nobody put any pressure on him. Sometimes, no matter how much you love them, family and money don’t always mix. K-H had quite a few MLS players as clients and had hired two agents who specialized in men’s professional soccer in the US as well as abroad. They were ready, willing and able to help Tanner if he wanted them to. Ken, Vicki and Koty were going to New York to spend the weekend with Tanner. Kyle and Nathan were going to be hanging out with them too, of course. Ali felt bad asking Ashlyn to come home from her reunion weekend early to take care of the kids, but they didn’t really have any other choice. Neither of them felt like they could ask any of the Florida grandparents to come help them because they had just helped them for two weeks of vacation! So, Ali and Ashlyn divided and conquered instead. These were the sacrifices they would make for many years to come as they raised their young family. 

“Yeah, I keep telling you, you wouldn’t like the college me. I was kind of a dick” the keeper looked sheepishly at the brunette. “Young and dumb and full of myself.”

“Well you couldn’t have been that bad because you have a lot of really great friends who knew you then and still like you now.”

“That’s what I’m saying. They like me now” she chuckled. “If I hadn’t grown up and stopped being such a jackass I don’t think any of them would give me the time of day now.”

“I find that hard to believe” Ali smiled again. “But I’ll take your word for it” she finished folding a towel and leaned towards the center of the bed pursing her lips. Ashlyn met her lips with a soft, sweet kiss that made them both relax a little bit more. “That was nice” the brunette pulled back and grabbed another towel as she held her wife’s gaze for a few seconds longer.

“I miss you already too baby” the keeper said softly as she returned to her spot and reached for one of the last two towels.

“I’ll finish these up if you go let the dogs out and lock up downstairs” Ali proposed with a glance at the clock on the nightstand. 10:28pm

“Yeah, I’m on it” Ashlyn answered as she got off the bed and headed for the backstairs. “Then we can go to bed?”

“Yep” Ali sighed. “We can...unless you’re not really packed...?”

“No, I’m all packed” she nodded at the suitcase by the dressing table in the corner. “Just toiletries in the morning, I promise.”

“Oh thank God” the brunette smiled with relief. “Then yes, we can go to bed babe. And you can even have a clean towel for your shower in the morning” she quirked her eyebrow at her wife and giggled. 

“Hallelujah” Ashlyn grinned. “My queen and savior comes to my rescue again...” 

Being home alone with the four kids was not easy, especially now that both Dodge and Lily were crawling. Whichever mom was home alone with them was in constant motion. Literally. Drew was almost self-sufficient which was a good thing, for the most part. He could put his own straws in his juice boxes and go to the bathroom by himself and follow basic commands and instructions. He would sit for hours and play video games though, if his moms let him. Ali and Ashlyn usually limited his time and closely monitored which games he was playing, but, in times like that weekend when it was one grown-up versus four kids, they let the time constraint rule slide. There just wasn’t a choice. He was still a 4-1/2 year old kid though and needed lots of supervision. Josie needed lots more help because she was only 2-1/2 years old. She was potty trained but still needed her bum wiped every time. She, thankfully, enjoyed drawing and coloring and didn’t care if she did that by herself. She rarely got bored during those activities. But sometimes she got a little too creative and went in search of the scissors or the glue and before you knew it, the entire nook table was covered in glitter and pipe cleaners and felt and paint, most of which was glued down to the actual table itself. The little artist might have needed the most supervision of all because she could get into more trouble. 

The twins were hard too because they were still on a multiple feeding and napping schedule and it legitimately felt like the second you put one of them down, the other one needed something else. It was non-stop like a song on repeat. If things got hairy, or if there was an emergency like the glue debacle at the nook table, the mom could put the twins in the front living room and gate both doorways off so they couldn’t go anywhere. They had already rigged up a gate that went in front of the tv and electronics near the front of the room. Neither Drew nor Josie had shown much interest in messing with any of that but Dodge and Lily both were drawn to it like moths to a flame. The only problem with leaving the twins unsupervised in the front living room was that it was simply a matter of time before one of them hurt the other one. It wasn’t because they were being mean to each other, it was more because they still couldn’t control their bodies that well. They were 8 months old and things flew out of their hands randomly and often at a pretty high velocity. Lily was usually the one who got hurt, but not always. She threw just as many blocks and cars and puzzle pieces as her brother. Maybe hers just didn’t land on him as often as his did on her.

And you could pretty much forget about bathtime if you were alone with all of them. At least you could forget about any deep cleaning. The only thing more difficult than feeding them all at the same time was bathtime. Both of those things were infinitely easier with a second pair of hands, but you had to make do with what you had. When it was a one-mom house it looked like a bomb had gone off by the time Ali or Ashlyn had finally gotten them all into their beds at night. It was unreal the messes that kids made and when you didn’t have the time to clean up after them as the day went along, you were left with one ginormous pigsty at the end of the day. When Ali finally came down the front stairs Friday night she felt about as tired as she had after giving birth to Drew. It was almost 9pm, which was late, but bathtime had taken forever which pushed bedtime back accordingly, and she hadn’t even eaten dinner yet. She cringed when she saw the disastrous state of the front living room and then actually winced at a jolt of pain in her temple when she walked back into the messy, dirty kitchen to try and find something to eat. It would have been funny if the thought of having to clean it all up hadn’t knocked the wind out of her. She was so tempted to just eat the cold, left-over chicken nuggets on Drew’s plate and go right up the backstairs and crawl into bed. But she knew she couldn’t do that. It would only make tomorrow ten times harder. She warmed up some leftover pad thai from lunch yesterday, she hoped it was from Ashlyn’s lunch yesterday, poured herself a glass of wine and sat down in the family room to eat and watch the NWSL draft she was DVR’ing. An hour. She would give herself an hour to eat, drink, decompress and watch her gorgeous wife do her thing on national television. Then she would get up and tackle one room at a time. 

Thank God she had been smart enough to call in reinforcements for Saturday. Sydney was coming in the morning because she hadn’t seen any of the Kriegers since Christmas. She was 8 months pregnant with baby number three, their surprise baby, so she wouldn’t be doing too much heavy lifting. But she was certainly capable of supervising and correcting and keeping the train on the rails. She was leaving her two boys home with Dom for a daddy day and she teased him that she might not come home at all on Saturday. Carm was coming over to help out with dinner and the evening routine. Kacey was travelling with the hockey team that weekend, she was an assistant coach for the BC women’s team, so Carm was free and, more importantly, willing. She didn’t have a lot of experience with kids but she was fearless and funny and those were two pretty good qualities to start with if you were going to brave an evening at the Krieger’s house.

And then, on Sunday, Ashlyn would have to do the same thing. If everything went according to plan with her flight from NC to Boston, she would get home just before 11am. Ali would take the same car from the car service back to the airport for her flight to NYC and, hopefully, arrive at 4pm. Just in time to make it to Kyle’s apartment and get to the convention center for the 6:00pm start. Tanner wasn’t going to be drafted in the first round, they didn’t think, so it wasn’t a huge deal if she was a little late. But she really didn’t want to be. She and her dad were pretty sure Tanner was going to be drafted early in the second round, but nobody really knew. Ali had received all sorts of calls and inquiries from prospective MLS teams and, based on all of that and their multiple team visits over the past couple of months, she was confident he would go in the second round, hopefully early on. But many of the teams were nervous about his lack of size and not really being open about it. It had been tough to handle for Ali and Tanner because if the teams had just asked them about it they could have addressed it, quashed any concerns and moved on. But with it being sort of an unspoken issue it was harder to dispel the myth of the ‘not quite big enough midfielder’ without actually bringing it up first. And if they did that, then they ran the risk of presenting a potential problem that the team may not even have been considering.

Tanner wasn’t tiny, not by a long shot. He was 5’10” with a thin, wiry build. He looked smaller or lighter than many pro players. Most teams wanted their defensive or holding midfielders to be tall enough to win most, if not all, of the aerial duels in the midfield. That was a tall order. It had always frustrated Ali that people assumed you wouldn’t win the header unless you were taller than the other player. She had managed to dominate the midfield and then backline when she played in college and she was definitely not close to the tallest player on the field. Winning headers was about body position, timing and how high you could jump. Ken Krieger had coached both his daughter and his step-son the same way and they were both really good in the air. But this myth about Tanner Wild being too short to play in the MLS had started to gather some steam during the weekend build up. 

When Tanner came to Ali to ask her to represent him she knew she would need help to get Tanner the best deal he could possibly get. Ali was a great agent, but she wanted to team up with Paul Calverson, one of the agents K-H had hired who specialized in men’s professional soccer. As soon as the rumors about Tanner’s height started making the rounds on Friday of draft weekend, Ali and Paul knew what they had to do. Paul got on the phone or in front of every MLS team that he could and addressed it head on. He told them all the same thing – that Tanner was stronger than he looked and that there was much more to winning a header than just the player’s height. He encouraged them to watch Tanner’s senior year reel because he knew it would prove his point. He told them to watch the reel again and they would see how Tanner used his surprising strength to ward off players and help control the ball. They would see how he used his exceptional technique and ball skills to elude and evade tackles and challenges. And they would see that he rarely lost an aerial challenge. He even scored a few goals sneaking in with a well-timed run to the back post on some set pieces. The kid could jump and his timing was impeccable.

The first two rounds of the draft were held Sunday evening. There were 24 teams in the league and they each had one pick per round, unless they had traded it away prior to the draft. Rounds three and four of the draft would be held Monday afternoon to complete the two-day event. Players that weren’t selected in the draft became free agents who could be signed by any of the 24 teams. It was a nerve-wracking evening for the whole Krieger and Wild family Sunday night. Kyle, Ali, Ken, Vicki, Koty and Paul Calverson all sat in the audience with Tanner as he waited to hear his name called out so he could go up on stage and get his new jersey and pose for a picture with the league commissioner. Hours went by. Nobody in his inner circle thought Tanner would go in the first round so they weren’t surprised that his name hadn’t been called to start the second round. Every pick that came and went in round two felt like extra weight stacked onto Tanner’s shoulders and the young man began to sweat in his seat.

“You stay strong now Tan” Ali said quietly but confidently into his ear from her seat next to him. “Keep your head up. Keep your face relaxed. Keep believing in yourself the way I do. The way we all do” she squeezed his arm, keeping her own smile steady as cameras panned the room looking for anybody showing signs of cracking under the pressure. “And you fucking remember every one of these teams who passed you by and you make them pay for it when the season starts.”

Ken Krieger bent his head slightly forward from his seat next to Vicki, on Tanner’s other side, and locked eyes with his daughter. He nodded as if he had heard what she had said and smiled when he saw the fire in her eyes. Tanner turned his head and winked at his step-father. 

48 picks had come and gone and still nobody had chosen Tanner Wild. They all went back to the hotel where Ken, Vicki, Tanner and Koty were staying and relaxed in the big suite that Ken and Vicki had reserved for the weekend. They were expecting a small celebration that night but instead had a gathering of another kind. Everybody there took turns telling the young man different versions of the same thing Ali had told him in the convention center. Ali and Paul were on the phone all night long, once they were halfway through the second round, trying to convince one of the six teams that had shown the most interest in Tanner over the past several months that they needed to draft him. Tanner had spent a few months training with the Colorado Rapids that summer and fall after he graduated in May and Ali couldn’t believe they hadn’t selected him in the second round. They had seen, firsthand, exactly how talented he was and how hard he worked and how ready he was for the next level. The Rapids had been her first phone call after the first night of the draft finished.

“Ali, listen, we know he’s the real deal” the general manager tried to explain. “But we’re stacked in the midfield. We need strikers and defenders and keepers before we even think about another middie, preferably strikers. I’m sorry.”

While Paul continued calling the teams Ali had an idea and got to work trying to see if there was any way she could pull it off. Her first call was to her wife to make sure she was still working from current information.

“Hey baby, I’m sorry about tonight” the keeper began when she answered the phone. It was past midnight and she was in bed about to fall asleep after a challenging day with the kids. “How’s Tan?”

“Oh, you know” she sighed, hearing her wife’s tired voice made Ali suddenly aware of how exhausted she was too. “Disappointed, confused, embarrassed...but he did so good Ash. I’m really proud of him.”

“I know” the blonde replied with a yawn. “I got to watch the end of the second round and the camera was just dying for somebody to lose their shit. Every time it panned near Tanner he looked good. So did you, by the way” her voice dropped lower. “You’re so fucking gorgeous honey...”

Ali heard the compliment and it did wonders for her wilting spirit and drooping energy level, but she was in work mode and had a very specific reason for calling.

“Thanks babe” she replied kind of curtly. “I need to ask you about McManus. I’m sorry but I’m trying to pull some magic out of my ass here tonight...”

Ashlyn immediately understood and felt bad for wasting time on pleasantries. She knew that Ali and Paul had a lot of work ahead of them and that all of it was going to be stressful and time-sensitive. This was business now.

“No, I got it. Sorry I wasn’t thinking” she apologized quickly. “I know you’ve got work to do and not much time to do it. How can I help?”

The next twelve hours were a blur for the busy brunette. She and Paul strategized and, using the intel Ali had received from her wife, came up with a plan they thought would work. It involved two clubs, three current players, a future draft pick and a little bit of luck. Tanner loved the idea, even though Ken was a little skeptical at first. Ali had called Whitney Flanagan and gotten her to review their idea and make it all work in legalese. Then she had called the general managers of the two teams she wanted to involve in the whopper of a draft day trade. They were both non-committal at first, but after a few more chats and one big, deep conversation each, Ali had them open to furthering the discussion. 

“Steve, look, I know you’re trying to land a big striker” Ali pushed the Colorado GM as the draft rolled on, halfway through the third round already, late Monday afternoon. “Your last viable option just left the board, thank you Vancouver. This deal will work, I’m telling you. But we’re running out of time.”

“I can’t believe they’d trade McManus. Where are you getting your information from Ali?”

“Steve, we’ve known each other for a long time now” Paul Calverson chimed in for the first time on this conference call. “This is solid. We wouldn’t be wasting your time, or ours, if it wasn’t. It’s a great deal. A win-win. Don’t miss out. I’m telling you...it’s solid.”

Meanwhile back in Boston Ashlyn was on a phone call of her own.

“Ash, I need to know, tell me the truth, no bs...is the kid for real? I trust Ali but I think she’s too close to this one. He’s her step-brother, right?”

“Jon I understand your concern, I really do” the keeper replied to Jonathan Kraft’s query, surprised by the urgency and anxiety in his voice. “But Tanner Wild is a player. He’s fast and strong and smart. He’s way stronger than he looks. He sees the pitch like he’s been doing it all his life. His technique is so good that if he can’t beat you with size he’ll beat you with skill, every damned time. The kid is absolutely for real. Please don’t make the same mistake everybody else is making – give him a shot. I promise you won’t regret it.”

“Yeah Harris, Mike Burns here, hope you don’t mind we’ve got you on speaker” the General manager of the NE Revolution jumped into the conversation. “That all sounds good and, honestly, we can see a lot of that while we’re looking at his reel here. What about all the other stuff? The intangibles...you know – what’s his heart like?”

“He’s as tough as fucking nails, pardon my French” the keeper spoke passionately. “He had an awful freshman year but it didn’t stop him. All it did was make him work harder. He’s as competitive as they come.”

“As competitive as you were?”

“About as close as you can possibly get” Ashlyn chuckled and was relieved when she heard three or four voices join her on the other end of the line. “You all know that Ken Krieger’s been working with him since he was 10 or 11 years old, right?”

There were various different responses to her question, most were yes but some were no.

“It shouldn’t matter, but Ken is his step-father” Ashlyn explained, knowing that Ken Krieger’s name carried a lot of weight in the New England soccer world. “Ali Krieger, my wife and his agent, is his step-sister. If you all think I’m tough and competitive you haven’t met the Kriegers. This kid eats those intangibles for breakfast. I promise you. He’s a great kid. He has an incredible head on his shoulders. You saw him last night, cool as a cucumber even though he was sure he’d go early in the second round...”

“So what happened with that anyway? Is it just the size thing?” Mike Burns asked the million dollar question.

“That’s what I hear” Ashlyn confirmed. “Which is complete bullshit. If anybody had watched any of his games they could have seen how dominant he is in the air. I’m telling you. You will not regret making this deal guys. McManus, from what I hear” she added coyly, “is unhappy here and looking to get out. He’s got a fat contract that you wouldn’t be sad to see go away either. This deal Ali put together, it’s a true win-win. You know it is.”

The truth of the matter was that the New England Revolution was a team that was just missing a couple of pieces that were keeping it from winning the MLS Cup. A strong, tactical, defensive midfielder who could distribute the shit out of the ball was one of them. Nobody mistook Tanner Wild for a franchise-making soccer star, but he was the type of player that made everybody else around him better and came up big in the big moments. McManus was a 29-year old all-star striker who was kind of an ass. His work ethic wasn’t what it used to be and he had let a lot of his fame and fortune go to his head over the past few years. He had two years left on his contract with NE and it definitely benefitted him far more than it did the team. Trading him would be a brilliant move that would save the Revolution money and free up valuable salary cap space to sign some of the new draft picks and even acquire some talented free agents. It truly was a good deal for both teams. New England had drafted a very talented rookie goalkeeper with their first round draft pick and then made a risky pick in the second round on a fast, technical forward, ideally designed to play alongside McManus. NE had looked at Tanner, they were one of the six teams interested in him originally, but their other needs in other positions were greater.

Back in NYC, Ali and Paul finally sat down in a room with both Mike Burns and Steve Cooke, the two GMs, to try and hash out the deal. When it was all said and done, which wasn’t until early in the fourth round, Ali breathed a huge sigh of relief and shook hands with the three men in the room with her.

“Thank you gentlemen” she smiled sincerely. “It’s been a pleasure doing business with you.”

The Colorado Rapids selected Tanner Wild in the middle of the fourth and final round of the draft, which was unfortunate. If they had gotten the deal done in the third round his rookie contract would have been worth more money. Ali wasn’t going to worry about that right now. She knew he would prove his worth on the pitch and she and Paul would get him a better contract then. As soon as they drafted him, Colorado announced a trade with New England and the whole convention center started buzzing. Colorado traded rookie midfielder Tanner Wild and young, upcoming, second-year defender Matt Gennuso along with a future draft pick to New England in exchange for all-star striker Porter McManus. The only people who weren’t happy were the Revolution fans because all they heard was that they were losing one of their favorite players. But, after the team’s public relations machine started working, they would soon understand the many benefits of the trade that would bring, hopefully, three talented young players to the team who would form the base of the defense for years to come. Goalkeeper, centerback and defensive midfielder – if Marco Busa, Matt Gennuso and Tanner Wild could be as good as the coaches and executives hoped, then NE would be in very good shape to contend for the MLS Cup for the next several seasons. 

Ashlyn was excited and relieved for the whole family. Tanner was going to sign a good contract with a team that she, personally, loved and trusted. Ali had pulled off one of the best blockbuster trades in recent years and anybody who was anybody in the MLS was talking about it. And all of the Kriegers, and Wilds, won because Tanner was playing for his hometown freaking team! It was just too good to be true. But as soon as the blonde thought about it like that, she corrected herself. Ali had made this happen. It wasn’t luck or good fortune. The brunette, her fucking baller of a wife, had been savvy enough to recognize an opportunity when one was presented to her, however tiny. As soon as she heard from the Colorado GM that they were really looking for a striker she had remembered a conversation she had with Ashlyn, just in passing, back in December after the MLS season ended, about what a jerk McManus was and how much his teammates disliked him and how miserable he was with the Revs. Voila. Unhappy, overpaid striker on the move. So much of an agent’s job was instincts and timing that it was really hard to judge their performance on a scale. It was full of more intangibles than black and white factors sometimes. All Ashlyn knew was that she was proud as hell of her wife and she couldn’t wait to see her and tell her in person what a badass she thought she was.

Of course, that would have to wait until Tuesday morning. Ali had barely made it in time to the draft in NYC Sunday evening. Then she had basically pulled an all-nighter, caught a brief nap early Monday morning, and then was right back at negotiations during the draft Monday afternoon and evening. The Kriegers and Wilds celebrated Tanner’s success Monday night and an extremely spent, but happy, Ali Krieger passed out on her brother’s couch after the fun was over. 

“Wake up sleepy head” Kyle cooed as he sat next to his sister on the couch, pushing her back with his butt so he would fit in front of her stomach. He held a steaming hot cup of coffee for her in his hands and was trying really hard not to spill it. “I can’t believe you didn’t even get into your jammies last night” he chuckled as he took in the sight of the still sleeping woman next to him. “And I don’t think I’ve ever seen you sleep with your bra on, except for when you were breastfeeding” he sucked in a breath, “I don’t know who you are any more” he teased dramatically and waited for another full minute with no response. “Well if you don’t want this glorious cup of coffee then I’ll just drink it for you” he brought the cup to his lips and took a sip, making sure to slurp loudly. “Mmmmmmmmmm that’s good...”

“Don’t you dare” she croaked out, eyes still closed and body still motionless.

“Oh! She’s alive! Praise Jesus! All my prayers have been answered. Somebody call a press conference – I’ve got big news to share...superstar agent found alive and well...well, found alive anyway. Let’s just go with that for now...”

Luna, intrigued by Kyle’s excited voice, walked over in a full body wag and stuck her face right up into Ali’s and snorted. Ali squealed at the wet contact and pulled her head back away from the snout as far as she could. Kyle just laughed hysterically which only spurred the dog on even more. Soon she was licking Ali’s face and forcing the brunette to cover it with both her hands while she giggled some more.

“Kyyyyyle” she whined. “Help me!” she laughed some more. 

Her brother knew, just from the raspy, low sound of her voice, that his sister was still exhausted. He had overheard part of her conversation last night with Ashlyn about just staying in NYC until Thursday and getting some rest. Kyle’s graduation ceremony from NYU film school was Thursday morning and Ali wasn’t going to miss it, no matter what. Her plan had always been to fly back to Boston Tuesday morning after the draft and then fly back down to NYC again early Thursday morning for graduation. Ken and Vicki had planned to spend this whole week in NYC so they could be there for both Tanner and Kyle and the big brother wished his little sister could have done the same thing, for her own sake.

“Ok Tuba” he put his hand on the dog’s head and moved it away from his sister. “She loves you too, but give her some space ok?” he spoke to Luna, using one of his nicknames for her. 

Ali sat up, slowly. She looked like she had been through the wars. It was obvious that she had done nothing the night before except fall onto the couch and into a deep sleep. Her make-up was all over her face, in all the wrong places, and her nice dress slacks and blouse were twisted and wrinkled almost beyond recognition. She reached into the front of her shirt and pulled her already unhooked bra out through her sleeve, dropping it into her lap.

“So you did take it off” Kyle giggled. “That’s the sissy that I know and love” he leaned over and kissed the side of her face.

“Coffee” she grunted, eyes barely open.

“Here you go” he carefully handed her the mug and smiled at one of his two favorite people on the planet. “Be careful, it’s really hot.”

Ashlyn jumped in surprise when she heard the mudroom door open Tuesday afternoon just after 3pm. She had just walked in the door herself after picking Drew up from preschool. The boy was enjoying a snack and watching a cartoon in the front living room. Ashlyn and Emma Donaldson, their 13-year old neighbor, were standing in the kitchen as the keeper thanked her and paid her for staying at the house with the three sleeping Krieger kids while she made the ten-minute trip to Drew’s nearby preschool. 

“Sweetheart” Ashlyn cooed when she saw her wife walk into the kitchen with a tired smile on her face. “I thought you were going to stay at Kyle’s until graduation?” she tilted her head in confusion but couldn’t keep the grin off of her face. She was very happy to see her wife.

“Hi Ali” Emma greeted sweetly as she walked past her towards the mudroom door. “See you tomorrow Ash.”

“Yeah, thanks Em” the keeper replied and waved goodbye to the neighbor girl. “See you tomorrow.”

Ashlyn opened her arms and let the brunette walk into them, resting her head against her keeper’s chest and wrapping her arms around her waist. Ashlyn closed her arms around Ali’s upper back and squeezed their bodies together, holding her close and pressing kisses into the top of her head.

“I am sooooo glad to see you honey” she mumbled against the brunette locks at her lips. “Surprised, but glad.”

“I missed you and it’s so hard here when you’re by yourself and I just...I wanted to come home” Ali replied meekly, not moving in any way to change her position.

“Mommy!” Drew exclaimed as he ran across the kitchen and slammed himself into Ali’s thighs with a big grin on his face. “You’re home! Mama said two more sleeps?”

“Hi sweet boy” Ali knelt down and pulled him into a proper hug, breathing in his busy, big boy preschool smell and rubbing his back. “Mama was right but my plans changed and now I’m home.”

“Yayyy!!” he enthused as he pulled back out of the hug.

“I’ve gotta get the babies up” Ashlyn said over her shoulder as she climbed the backstairs.

“Is Josie here too?” Ali asked, cocking her head and listening towards the front of the house.

“Oh, yeah” the keeper replied from halfway up the stairs. “I didn’t get all the way to daycare this morning so I just kept her here. Sorry.”

“Totally ok babe. I think she’s up. I’ll get her” Ali offered as she stood up again. “Let’s all sit together when all the sleepyheads get up ok bud?” she put her hand on top of Drew’s head and walked with him into the front living room.

“Um-kay” he nodded, still basking in the happiness of having his mommy home unexpectedly.

Fifteen minutes later, Ali and Ashlyn sat together on the couch in the front living room with their four children perched all over and around them. Ali had changed into sweats after getting Josie up from her nap and helped Ashlyn get both twins in her strong arms for the trip down the stairs. Dodge and Lily were usually up almost an hour before Josie was at afternoon naptime, but their schedules were a little off. That’s what happened when you tried to take care of four kids under the age of 5 all by yourself for more than one day. Shit just happened. Ashlyn had done very well Sunday, her first half-day by herself. She had managed to get everybody in bed and everything cleaned up before crawling into bed and talking with her wife from NYC. Monday had been more difficult and that’s when she had asked Emma to help her for a little while in the afternoon so she could go pick up Josie from daycare in Lynnfield and Drew from preschool near their house in Gloucester. Emma was allergic to dogs so she couldn’t stay long, but her mom said she could stay with the twins long enough for Ashlyn to make her pick-ups. The keeper had signed her up for the same deal through Thursday, while Ali would be away.

“I wish I’d thought of that” Ali mumbled as they sat on the couch watching their kids enjoy their post-nap snacks while watching Spongebob Squarepants.

“You had them over the weekend so you didn’t get to take advantage of daycare and school” Ashlyn patted her wife’s leg and then rubbed Lily’s back as she sat on Ali’s knees. “I’m sorry the house is such a mess...”

“Ashlyn” Ali turned her head to look at her beautiful wife sitting next to her. “I know exactly how hard it is to do this by yourself. As long as everybody’s good and the house is still standing I don’t care about anything else” she leaned over and puckered her lips, waiting for the blonde to close the distance.

“Amen to that” Ashlyn brought their lips together in a sweet, slow kiss that made them both feel better, if only for a few minutes. “Should I call Whitney and tell her not to bother coming over tonight?”

“No, are you crazy?” Ali chuckled. “Let her come up, Ryan too if he’s around, we’ll order in and they can play with our kids while we clean up” she leaned her head against her keeper’s strong shoulder and smiled at Dodge as he laughed along with the tv. “Unless you want to save her for Thursday when I’m back in New York for graduation? Which I would totally understand.”

“Nah, I’ve got Kristie lined up for Thursday. She’s so excited. I think she actually thinks she might be able to get pregnant just from being in this house with our kids” she laughed.

Ali rolled her eyes and chuckled.

“She knows there’s more to it, right? For example, her odds would greatly increase if she brought her husband with her...”

They both laughed again, drawing a frustrated look from Josie, sitting on the other side of Ashlyn.

“Mama, shhhhhh” she frowned at both of her moms before turning her attention back to the tv.

“Can we just stay here like this for the next fifteen hours?” Ali asked quietly, head still resting heavily against her wife’s shoulder. She could barely keep her eyes open. “Please?”

All four kids started laughing at Squidward’s antics and their laughter buoyed both Ali and Ashlyn’s hearts and spirits. Yes, it was exhausting and it had been a particularly trying stretch of five days, but neither woman would change one bit of it. Those four little voices and hearts were more than enough to keep the moms going against all odds and challenges.

“Sounds perfect to me baby.”


	4. Ashlyn's Big Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut warning at the end.

“Ashlyn! Ashlyn! Ash...can we have a quick minute?!” the young woman with the microphone finally got the keeper’s attention from her spot behind the velvet ropes of the red carpet. “Ashlyn Harris, star of the biggest, boldest campaign that Nike has unveiled in years” she began breathlessly once the keeper stopped and leaned towards her so she could hear her over the din of shouting photographers, flash bulbs, limousine engines, camera shutters and screaming fans. “You look stunning tonight, by the way” the young woman paused and stared for a quick second before recovering. “Are you excited for your big night?”

“Sure, it’s gonna be a great night, a great party. I’m very excited to be here” Ashlyn answered and flashed her megawatt smile with the dimple popping into view.

“Can you tell us who your handsome dates are tonight?”

“Oh, of course” the blonde grinned as she looked behind her a half step where the three good-looking, well-dressed men were patiently waiting for her to finish her interview before continuing up the red carpet and into the swanky hotel ballroom for the party. She pulled them towards her one at a time as she identified them, putting her arms around their waists as she did so. “This is my brother Chris. And this is my brother-in-law Kyle. And this hottie is my other brother-in-law Nathan” she beamed at her boys as they matched her and returned their own toothy grins. “Who’s luckier than me?” she winked into the camera and started to pull away from the young woman so they could keep moving.

“Your wife couldn’t make it tonight?” she pushed, squeezing one last question in before losing the star of the evening.

“No, she’s supporting me from home, taking care of the kids so I can be here tonight” Ashlyn replied earnestly. She leaned into the camera, kissed her fingers and touched her heart with them as she spoke. “I love you baby.”

The Nike party was epic and Ashlyn loved every minute of it. It was Wednesday night, February 7th, two weeks after Kyle’s graduation, one day before Ali and Ashlyn’s 8th February anniversary, and two days before Chris’ 40th birthday. Ashlyn had taken Chris as her official date so they could celebrate his momentous birthday in style with what was probably going to be a once in a lifetime night. She doubted her plan a couple of times but then, at Ali’s urging, talked to her brother to make sure he would enjoy it as much as she thought he would. It was supposed to be a nice night for him but she realized it was really going to be all about her. She knew he’d love meeting some of his sports idols and famous people. She knew he’d love the music performances and celebrities. And she knew he’d love being treated like a king as her date for the night. She just wanted to make sure.

“Bash, are you kidding?” he laughed into the phone a week before the big night. “I’m psyched about this. If half the people you say are going to be there are really going to be there, then it sounds like a dream come true to me.”

“I just, it feels wrong to have you come and watch people think I’m a big deal to celebrate your birthday. It feels fucked up. But...truthfully, there’s nobody I’d want with me next week more than you. You know better than anybody else who I am and where I’ve been and what I’ve gone through. What we’ve gone through. In my mind, when they’re telling me I did good, they’re really saying we did good. The both of us because we have. You know?”

“I already said it was cool sis, geez. You didn’t have to make me feel things too.”

Since she retired Ashlyn wasn’t in the spotlight as much anymore and she realized, a little sheepishly, how much she had missed it. She was the belle of the ball at the Nike event, only it wasn’t that type of party. It was packed with superstar athletes and famous celebrities and musicians and Ashlyn got to meet almost all of them. There were hundreds of pictures taken and posted all over social media of the keeper with dozens of her old soccer friends and broadcast friends and hockey friends and football friends. It was amazing. The highlight of the night had to be Lady Gaga’s impromptu performance at the piano. It was completely unplanned and after she played and sang three songs she got up, took the microphone that one of the techies had quickly set up on top of the piano for her, and held court for a few minutes.

“Ashlyn...my love, where are you?” she called out as her eyes scanned the enormous room.

Kyle started waving his arms from the middle of the room and helped the keeper stand on one of the chairs that were dotted around the room near the decorated tables with different, framed photographs of the blonde from the new Nike campaign. Ashlyn, now taller than most people, except for the basketball players and some of the football stars, waved her arm above her head and smiled at the megastar with the microphone.

“There she is” Gaga smiled broadly and cocked her head when she saw the keeper. “This human...” she paused and waited for the applause that had started up after she identified Ashlyn to die down before continuing. “This human is so beautiful” she shook her head adoringly at the blushing blonde who was trying to maintain her composure. Ashlyn felt Kyle’s strong hand on her leg and knew he would catch her if something went wrong up there. It wasn’t every day that Lady fucking Gaga went on a five-minute spiel extolling your virtues for the whole world to hear. Ashlyn really thought she might faint under the intense scrutiny, no matter how well-intentioned it was. “And I don’t just mean on the outside, because that” she quirked her eyebrow, “is easy for anyone to see” she winked at Ashlyn who blew her a kiss in return. “I have the great privilege of working with her on the Mental Health Initiative and let me tell you, what’s on the inside of this amazing woman is a thousand times more beautiful than what we can see on the outside.” She paused and nodded her head slowly as she let the crowd shout out ‘we love you Ashlyn’ several times. “That’s right. We love you Ashlyn. Here’s to you my friend. You deserve all of this and more!” she toasted with a glass of champagne and everyone joined her and then cheered for the keeper.

Ashlyn blew her another kiss, fought back some tears and let Kyle help her down off the chair.

“Holy shit sis” Chris said into her ear as he gave her a hug. “Can you fucking believe this?”

“No Bubba, I can’t” she shook her head, wide-eyed and thankful she could hide her face in his shoulder while she got her shit together. “I’m so glad you’re here tonight. I love you.”

The four of them spent the next couple of hours dancing and laughing and drinking. Ashlyn was careful not to drink too much, but she wanted to have fun too. She finally found Hilary Knight, who, at age 34-3/4, was playing in her final season in the NWHL for the Boston Pride. When the Pride played in the playoffs this April, hopefully for another championship cup, they would be Knight’s last games ever. She would retire as the most-decorated International hockey player, male or female, the United States had ever produced. Her career in the NWHL had broken or made records everywhere she turned. She had played her entire 9-year career, from the very first year the league started in 2015, with the Boston Pride and they had won an unprecedented 7 championships in that time. The league had grown to ten teams this season and she had been one of the very best to take the ice each and every year. Even this year, when she was noticeably feeling some injuries that her body couldn’t bounce back from the way it used to, she was still a contender for league MVP. Hilary had made a special trip from Boston to NYC that Wednesday night to honor one of her best friends and colleagues and co-business owners. 

“Hil, you made it” Ashlyn said into the tight hug the two women shared.

“Wouldn’t have missed it Ash.”

They made the rounds together, introducing each other to other famous athletes and celebrities that they knew. Hilary had a game on Friday night so she couldn’t stay out too late or drink or eat anything too yummy. Her older body couldn’t make up for her lapses in judgment any more so she had to be good. When it was time for her to leave, Ashlyn walked her towards the lobby and they sat together on one of the plush couches while they waited for her ride to the hotel.

“Can you believe this is all because of Betty Sue’s?” the keeper giggled and bumped her shoulder into Hilary’s.

“Oh man, I still love going into a Betty Sue’s, don’t you?” Hilary chuckled with her.

“Totally” Ashlyn agreed. “Every single one I’ve ever been in has a framed poster of us on the wall...”

“At least one!” Hilary laughed. “I was in one last week, up in Newburyport, and they had a side by side poster with our very first commercial and the last one we just did last year.” She paused and grinned. “One of us hasn’t changed a bit.”

“Oh screw you Knighter!” Ashlyn laughed out loud and swatted Hilary’s thigh. “It’s the hair, it makes me look older and wiser.”

“Yeah, older, definitely” the hockey star giggled.

“Well I am four years older than you, you jackass!”

They were quiet for a minute, both getting reflective on the past 9-1/2 years of friendship and business and life.

“Betty Sue’s may have stumbled onto how great we are together” Hilary said slowly and seriously. “But that’s all they did. This” she looked around the expensive, swanky hotel and gestured with her hands, “is because of you and me and Ali and hard work.” She looked into Ashlyn’s face and met her thoughtful gaze. “Don’t you ever think otherwise Ash. Anything other than that is a lie.”

“Thanks Hil. I appreciate it” the blonde started to get emotional. “I know you’ll pretend it’s not true, but you and I both know the only reason Nike took a chance on us the first time is because of you. You’re the one that got us in the door. You and your fucking awesome Olympic medals. I’ll never be able to repay you for that...”

“Well, I wouldn’t be able to retire and not worry about being able to pay my bills if you hadn’t worked so hard to set up our company. I’ll never be able to repay you for that, so we’re even” she grinned at her friend as the doorman let them know her car had arrived.

“We’re a pretty fucking good team, aren’t we?” Ashlyn stood up and hugged her friend again.

“The fucking best” Hilary squeezed her and stepped back. “You deserve all of this Ash” she looked around the beautiful hotel lobby again and nodded towards the ballroom where the party was still going on. “Now go enjoy it.”

Before the night was through, one of the most popular pictures on all of social media was of Chris and Kyle sitting next to each other on a swanky couch in a dimly lit area of the party. Ashlyn sat sideways on Kyle’s lap with her arm around his shoulders, head thrown back in mid-laugh, and Lady Gaga sat facing her, on Chris’ lap, reaching her hand out and resting it on Ashlyn’s knee. Nathan stood behind the couch holding Gaga’s other hand and laughing along with the keeper. Chris and Kyle were sharing their own look of disbelief at the situation. They were all dressed to the nines and beautiful but the thing that jumped out of the picture at anybody who looked at it was how happy they all were. And it was true. The only thing that could possibly have made Ashlyn any happier that night was if her beautiful brunette could have been by her side. 

Thursday night when the keeper returned to the big old house she was still happy about her big night and getting to spend it with her brother, and brothers-in-law. But she was also happy to be home. Chris had probably just landed in Florida and she sent him a quick text as she put her suitcase down in the mudroom and then greeted the dogs. It was late, after 11pm, and she knew Ali and the kids were all asleep. She had promised her wife that she would wake her up to say hello when she got home – it was the only way she could get Ali to agree to go to sleep and not wait up for her. The keeper hung her coat up and put her shoes away, in the closet where they belonged for a change. She drank a bottle of water and ate some grapes as she admired three finger paintings that were drying on the nook table. She recognized Josie’s handiwork and smiled, wondering which of the twins had decided not to do a painting.

When she finally made it up the backstairs she was stunned at the sight awaiting her. The bedroom was romantically lit by a dozen wide, round candles that were spread around the surfaces of the room. Two each were on the dressing table, the low dresser at the foot of the bed, Ali’s tall dresser closest to the bed, the fireplace mantel, and one on each nightstand with two more on the master bathroom vanity. Between the two candles on the dressing table was a beautiful, dark but shiny vase that looked almost like an abstract figure eight. The candlelight flickered in the reflection of the metallic material of the vase which held a dozen long-stemmed red roses. There were some slow jams playing softly and Ashlyn took a step into the room and gazed around, dumbfounded. She felt something soft and different under her sock-covered feet and noticed the rose petals trailing from where she stood to the master bathroom straight ahead. The keeper smiled and shook her head, incredibly moved by the sweet and romantic night her wife had planned and set up. But where was Ali? All of this was great, but the blonde was now desperate to hold her love in her arms and tell her how much she loved and appreciated her. 

She walked quickly to the open bathroom door and turned to the right, towards the wall with the window behind the toilet. There she was. Wow. Ashlyn stopped in her tracks and stared at her beautiful brunette.

“Ali...” she exhaled softly and left her mouth hanging open as her eyes tried to focus on the goddess in front of her.

Ali was leaning against the wall, three feet in front of the blonde – it was the only place in the room where she could stay out of sight and out of the reflection in the mirror until her wife actually stepped into the room. She wore a sexy new set of lingerie that had the keeper drooling instantly. It was a light peach with black trim and details, two-piece bustier set with a long, sheer matching robe that fell to mid-calf. It was open and Ali stood with her hand on her hip and her chest stuck out provocatively while she slowly and invitingly trailed her free hand down between her breasts and across her stomach.

“Welcome home honey” the words oozed from her lips and her voice was low and a little raspy.

Ashlyn wondered if she had been asleep recently and knew that the answer was yes when she saw a sleep crease on the side of Ali’s face, right underneath the side of her glasses. The brunette saw her wife studying her face and tried to turn her head away so she couldn’t see the evidence of her failed attempt to stay awake until she got home. But that little sleep crease in her face just made Ashlyn love her even more. God she was a lucky woman.

“Al, you look amazing” she stammered. “The room, the candles, everything looks incredible...thank you baby” she stepped forward and reached for her gorgeous wife.

“Ah ah ah” she chastised coyly, wagging a finger at the blonde. “You have way too many clothes on. Get on my level Harris” she purred and pressed a hot kiss into Ashlyn’s cheek as she walked past her and back into the bedroom. “Then you can touch.”

“Yes ma’am” the keeper replied quickly, her voice already thick with desire. She stuck her head out of the bathroom door and watched her sexy wife walk all the way over to the fireplace, sheer peach robe trailing softly behind her and blocking a little bit of the view. “Fuck me” she breathed out as she stripped off her clothes, never taking her eyes off of Ali.

When she was completely naked she stepped all the way out of the bathroom and stood in front of the dressing table right next to the bathroom door. Ashlyn was still a little self-conscious about her stomach. She was getting used to the spider’s web stretchmarks but the extra skin that still clung to her belly really bothered her. On her better days, she remembered how much she had loved Ali’s naked body after both of her pregnancies, before she had been able to get her stomach tight again. She knew the brunette felt the same way about hers. She knew it and she just had to keep reminding herself of it at times like this. 

As soon as she saw Ashlyn’s naked beauty, Ali’s whole body felt like somebody had just thrown a switch and turned her entire nervous system up to maximum level. This always happened to the brunette and it annoyed her every time. She was annoyed with herself because she just could not hold it together when Ashlyn got naked for her. She wished she had been clearer with her instructions and told her keeper to leave her nursing bra and underwear on, but it was too late for that now. At least then the brunette would have been able to let this play out a little bit longer. As it was, Ali was using every ounce of her willpower not to run across the room and stuff Ashlyn’s sexiest openings with her tongue and fingers. Goddamn that woman drove her wild.

“Happy Anniversary sweetheart” she said softly, instead, with a quick glance at the clock on the nightstand, “in seven minutes. You are absolutely gorgeous Ashlyn.”

The blonde could smell the sweet scent of the roses behind her and feel her own juices collecting between her legs as she continued to stare at the delicate peach fabric covering many of her favorite parts of her wife. She could see how dark Ali’s eyes had become and knew whatever game she had planned would be a quick one. That was just fine with her. Neither one of them had ever been any good at holding back once they were on this path.

“Thanks baby” Ashlyn replied sweetly and then smirked as she watched her wife shift positions over by the mantel. She knew Ali was turned on and probably trying to rub her thighs together to get some relief for her aching clit. “Are you coming over here or am I going over there?”

“That depends...” she purred seductively.

“On what?” Ashlyn leaned over and put her nose right in the soft roses and took a deep breath, never taking her eyes off of her seductress.

“On whether or not you know the answer to the question” Ali smiled mischievously and licked her lips as she shifted her weight back to the other leg again.

“Well lay it on me sexy” Ashlyn grinned as she stood up straight again. “I can only control myself for so long you know...”

Ali did know. She knew it was just as hard for Ashlyn not to pounce on her as it was for her not to jump on her keeper. They both sucked at the waiting and teasing game.

“What’s the traditional gift for the 8th wedding anniversary, All-star” she challenged with a quirk of her eyebrow. The use of her usually playful, tongue-in-cheek nickname for the blonde contradicted everything else going on and threw the keeper off for a minute. Which was exactly what the brunette wanted. “If you get the answer right you get to do whatever you want” she paused and looked down her own body and back up before locking eyes with Ashlyn again “to this body.”

“And if I don’t?” Ashlyn quirked her own eyebrow and smirked.

“Then you don’t get to touch me at all” Ali’s voice lowered and her gaze hardened. “No hands for you tonight.”

Ashlyn chuckled softly and let her eyes wander up and down Ali’s sexy body again, staring openly and brazenly at her wife.

“I’m not sure you’ve thought this all the way through sweetheart” her words were sweet and cocky at the same time. “If I can’t use my hands to touch your smoking hot body tonight...” she paused for dramatic effect and to make sure the brunette was following along, “then you don’t get to have my hands touch your smoking hot body tonight” she finished with a quirked eyebrow and a challenging tilt forward of her head.

It was Ali’s turn for a low, throaty chuckle and, when she heard it, Ashlyn felt more passion pool in her throbbing core. She swallowed hard and tried to think of the answer to the question. She had already researched it once because she wanted to get something special for Ali for their actual wedding anniversary in August. They didn’t usually do the numbered anniversary thing for this February celebration. February 8th was when they first professed their love to each other the day after the Super Bowl when Ashlyn had nearly frozen herself to death after walking in on Ali and Sarah about to have sex. They chose to focus on the way the day had turned out instead of the way it had started and had decided to celebrate it every year instead of Valentine’s Day. What the fuck was the traditional gift for the 8th anniversary?!

“Oh honey” Ali chuckled again, “there are so many ways you can get me off without using those amazing fingers of yours” she brought both of her hands to her own breasts and squeezed them through the bustier, biting her bottom lip at the same time and closing her eyes for a second.

“Oh yeah?” Ashlyn was stalling, trying to come up with the answer. The idea of all of this build-up and then not being able to squeeze those breasts herself or feel Ali’s silky folds was just too much. She just needed a minute to focus. “How would you do that?”

“Mmmmmmm...well, I would start by grinding all over your thigh, both thighs, one at a time, until they were drenched in all of my juices.” The brunette continued to lazily move her hand across her stomach and hips and down to her crotch for a quick little squeeze. She gasped when she touched herself through the satin thong.

Ashlyn actually whimpered, audibly, when she heard that gasp. Her mind kicked into overdrive.

“Then,” Ali spoke slowly, her words dripping with desire, “I would fuck your face and let you eat me out until I came all over you...” she smirked when she saw Ashlyn’s brow furrow, trying to concentrate and having a difficult time. “I would soak your gorgeous face...”

“Bronze!” the keeper exclaimed, interrupting her wife. “Bronze, it’s fucking bronze. Oh my God...bronze” she exhaled and then sighed again, more relieved than she thought possible. She closed her eyes for a couple of seconds and willed the throbbing between her legs to quiet down. “Which is why you have so thoughtfully put these roses in this beautiful, bronze vase!” she said excitedly as she finally realized how the vase could be dark but still shiny. “That’s so cool Al” she turned her head to admire the vase again. “And is it shaped like an 8 too? Or am I just seeing that because you’ve tortured me so much that I can’t think straight anymore” she laughed and looked at her wife across the room.

“Oh, well aren’t you the smart one?” she giggled. “Bronze is right, or pottery” she nodded. “And yes that’s a bronze vase that’s shaped like a figure 8. Bravo babe.” Ali smiled warmly at her keeper before getting serious again. “Those are the traditional gifts, but what are the modern gifts?”

“No fucking way” Ashlyn shook her head and walked around the foot of the bed towards her beautiful, sexy, lingerie-clad brunette.

Ali squealed, laughed, and tried to get away, hopping onto the bed to try to get back to the other side of the room, but Ashlyn was too quick for her. The keeper caught her by her hips as the brunette fell to her knees on the bed, laughing loudly. It was the first time Ashlyn had gotten a close-up view of the rear of the lingerie.

“Oh Jesus, it’s a fucking thong too?” the keeper groaned as she knelt on the edge of the bed behind her squirming wife. She had her arms wrapped around Ali’s waist and was not planning to let go anytime soon. “Are you trying to kill me woman? All of that sexy foreplay and talk and this incredible outfit...and it’s a thong too?”

“Are you gonna live, All-star?” the brunette giggled as the electricity of their bodies finally touching each other sparked throughout her system. “Or is this just all too much for you?” she teased as she bent forward and rested her elbows on the bed so her ass was up and exposed to her adoring wife.

“You are definitely trying to kill me” Ashlyn swallowed hard and moved a hand across the robe-covered ass in front of her. She kept her left hand on Ali’s hip in case she got any other ideas about torturing her and running away. “Jesus you’re something else Ali...I swear to God” she paused to steady her voice. “I don’t know how the hell you do it, but I want you more every single day we’re together. Every single fucking day.”

“I know the feeling” the brunette said hotly, moving her ass slowly from side to side.

Ashlyn pushed the robe to one side, over the left hip she was holding, so she had an unobstructed view of the object of her desire. She moved her other hand across the soft, smooth flesh, gently caressing both ass cheeks and some of each thick thigh. The keeper could feel herself starting to lose control. That hazy, overwhelmed feeling that she used to get when they first started having sex together still occasionally cropped up at certain times. It stunned her momentarily in that moment and she felt her emotions start to run away on her again as she continued the soft touch.

“Mmmmmmm” Ali moaned and rocked her hips backwards, looking for a little more action. “You won the game” she purred, “what are you gonna do to me, sexy?”

Her wife’s sultry voice brought the blonde back to life and she swallowed hard as the lust surged through her veins again. Ashlyn pulled Ali back into her by her hips, one hand on each side, and they both moaned when they felt the skin on skin contact. The keeper reached around with her right hand and slid her palm from Ali’s stomach down to her thong-covered mound. She heard another gasp from her wife and pressed her fingers against her clit.

“Oh shit...yessss...” Ali’s voice was low and hoarse.

Ashlyn applied pressure with her fingers all the way down to the brunette’s wet entrance, the satin thong absolutely soaked already.

“Christ Al” she husked out hotly, “I love how wet you get for me...”

“Get the strap-on” Ali gasped, knowing her wife loved to use it on her in this position, “and fuck me...now... please babe...”

Ashlyn bent over her wife’s back so that her large, tender breasts were resting near her shoulder blades and moved both of her hands up and down the front of Ali’s body. She moved them slowly but steadily and squeezed her breasts in their bustier and then toyed with her clit again. She dragged her blunt nails against the brunette’s sweet spot by her left hip and smirked when she heard her wife’s breath hitch at the sensation.

“Please Ash...I need you so bad...fuck...” she writhed under her keeper’s tantalizing touches as her heart rate picked up even more. “You looked so good last night...like a fucking rock star...I got so wet just looking at pictures of you...”

“Oh yeah?” the keeper increased the pressure at both her hands and continued her touches, spending more and more time teasing around Ali’s wet entrance with each pass. She pressed a hot, open-mouthed kiss to her wife’s spine before speaking again. “And what did you do about that little problem, I wonder?”

“Ohhh, fuck babe” Ali groaned as the keeper kept working her up and driving her wild with her hands and mouth. “I...I...shit that feels good...”

“Do you want more?” the blonde’s words were dripping with desire as she dragged her fingers through Ali’s folds, beneath the thong for the first time.

“Yessssssssss...fuck me, please...I need to feel you inside me...”

“Tell me what you did last night” Ashlyn bit down on the skin of Ali’s back, not too hard, but not too gently either. “Exactly.”

Ali hissed and sucked in a breath when she felt the bite, but then Ashlyn slid her fingers through her drenched pussy lips again and her head was spinning. She was almost dizzy with desire and she rested her forehead down on the bed, unable to hold it up any longer.

“Tell me what you did and I’ll fuck you...with the strap-on...even though I won the game and I get to do whatever I want tonight” the blonde urged smugly.

“Mmmmmmm” Ali moaned again at another tantalizing touch to her clit. “Fuck...ok...ummmm...I touched myself...”

“Where were you? What were you wearing?” the keeper continued working her girl up and getting herself absolutely soaking wet in the process. Fuck this was hot. “Tell me, I want to picture it...”

“Ooooh, Jesus...mmmmm...I was in bed...”

“This bed right here?” Ashlyn pressed her hips into Ali’s ass and pushed her head down into the bed for a few seconds.

“Mmmmm, yes babe, our bed...fuck that’s good...” the brunette’s breath hitched again as Ashlyn pushed the thong to the side and teased Ali’s entrance. “I had on pajamas, the Patriots ones...” she gave more detail, catching on, “with a sleep tank.”

“What were you looking at baby?”

“You...fuck, you...you looked so sexy in your new suit, and your boobs...Jesus, they kept trying to pop out of your shirt...”

“Your phone or your laptop?” the keeper slid her lips down Ali’s spine, nibbling and sucking and licking the exposed skin, and then kissing the back of the bustier, as she moved closer to her ass.

“Phone...”

“Then what?”

“I...I pushed my pants down so I could get my leg out...mmmmmmmm...oh yeah...and then I bent my knees up and started playing with my clit... and my pussy...”

“Not your boobs? Why...”

“My boobs too, yeah babe, I wanted you so bad and I was soooo wet for you...”

“Wetter than you are right now?” Ashlyn dragged her fingers through her wife’s soaked folds again and then leaned forward and brought them to Ali’s lips. The brunette eagerly sucked on the fingers, licking her own juices up and moaning loudly.

“No, no...nothing makes me wetter than your skin on mine...your touch...your mouth...”

“Tell me more” Ashlyn urged again. “I want to fuck you.”

“Oh God...mmmmm...I...I put two fingers inside my pussy and pretended they were yours...it felt so good and I got even wetter...”

Ali was a throbbing, moaning mess as she tried to tell her sexy, bossy wife how she touched herself.

“I love your pussy so much...I wish my fingers were inside you right now...”

“Please, I need you inside...please...”

“Finish telling me what you did so I can fuck you” the blonde squeezed hard on one of Ali’s breasts, through the peach fabric, and made her moan loudly.

“Fuck...I fucked myself, with my fingers, and it felt so good...” Ali’s body shivered and she sucked in a breath as her excitement rose still higher. “I rubbed my clit and fucked myself until I came, my nipples were so hard...and it was all because of you, it was all for you. I love you Ash.”

The keeper couldn’t resist another second, she was just as turned on as her beautiful brunette. She pushed two fingers into her wife’s hot, wet center from behind and started thrusting them in and out slowly. Ashlyn kept her body pressed against her wife’s back, bustier still in place, and gave a few more squeezes to her breasts before trailing that hand down her chest and stomach until it got to her short hairs. The blonde moved more of the thong aside so she could feel nothing between her fingertips and Ali’s swollen, aching clit.

“Oh my fucking God...yessssssssssssss...” Ali released a long, low moan when she felt her wife’s hands finally starting to pump into her. “Unnnnhhhhh, Jesus, yes, so good...” she husked out as Ashlyn increased her pace.

Their bodies were pressed together and moving as one, which was good because Ali’s back was supporting Ashlyn’s sore breasts. The keeper’s long, strong fingers thrusted in and out of her wife’s tight core while her other hand rubbed and squeezed her sensitive clit.

“Was it like this baby?” Ashlyn’s hot breath surprised the brunette when she felt it on her bare shoulder. “Was it like this when you made yourself come last night?”

“Yes...unnnhhhh...yessssss...you feel so good...please don’t stop...don’t stop...fuck...”

Ashlyn kept pumping and rubbing and sucking on Ali’s back until they had both worked up a little bit of a sweat. She felt the brunette’s silky walls start to close in around her fingers and Ali’s legs start to slide out from under her as the brunette fought to maintain control of them.

“You are fucking incredible” the keeper husked out, excited and turned on and desperate for her wife’s release. “So fucking sexy...I can’t believe how hot you make me. Goddamn woman...”

It only took another minute before Ali’s orgasm took over. She came hard and collapsed onto the bed as her body shook and the pleasure coursed through her veins. Ashlyn went to the bed with her, arms still around her waist and slowly stroking her through her high. She rolled them onto their left sides so she could keep moving her fingers through the brunette’s soaked folds. The keeper pressed kisses into whatever bare skin she could find on Ali’s shoulder and neck and arm, humming into each one as her wife’s body twitched through some aftershocks.

“I love you Ali. So fucking much. Happy Anniversary baby.”


	5. Done and No

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've talked about my nieces and nephews in some of the comments previously but I thought maybe I should make an official statement for everybody to read. My brother and his wife have four kids and they are spaced out exactly as Ali and Ashlyn's are, except my brother's oldest is one year older. So when he was 6 his little sister was 3 and the twins were 1. The Krieger kids are not my nieces and nephews in any way shape or form, but they are inspired by them for sure. I've watched my sister-in-law learn how to take care of all four of them by herself and I've experienced a fair share of babysitting time over the years too. So, if any of it rings true - that's why. And if it seems like it's too much to be real....it was real. lol. One of the experiences that happens to one of the kids later in this part of the story happened on my watch and I'll make sure to tell you when we get there. ;)  
> Thanks for reading!

The first seven weeks of the year had come at them fast and furious, granted the first two weeks of the year had been vacation, but ever since they returned home it had been a non-stop schedule of events and short trips for both moms as they took care of business and their babies. After a relatively calm end to February, highlighted by Meg’s February vacation week at the big old house, March started off with a bang. Baby Dwyer #3 was born on Saturday, March 2nd and both mother and miracle surprise good luck baby were healthy. Sydney and Dom had stopped telling people that they got pregnant by accident because it just made them both sound like idiots. Of course they knew that if she stopped taking the pill and they continued to have sex that getting pregnant could happen. Duh. That’s how it works. But with all the trouble they had getting pregnant with James and Sydney’s age, 39, and everything she had gone through with the frightening miscarriage before that and the incredibly difficult pregnancy with Cassius, they genuinely thought they wouldn’t get pregnant again. After even their closest friends gave them more than a little bit of side-eye at the explanation, the Dwyers just decided not to tell anybody else about the surprise part of it. 

“There he is” Ali cooed softly as she entered the mother/baby suite that Saturday afternoon. 

She went right to her best friend’s side and kissed her forehead before looking down at the beautiful baby boy nursing at her breast. The brunette placed a delicate kiss to the top of his head, inhaling deeply at the same time. She closed her eyes and stood up straight with a broad smile across her face.

“Let me get a hit of that” Ashlyn said quietly as she changed places with her wife and did the same thing. “Ahhhh...nothing better than that new baby smell. Why has nobody been able to come up with that in a spray bottle?”

“Congrats big daddy” Ali bent over and hugged Dom as he sat in the chair on the other side of the bed. “Another bouncing baby boy, you must be so proud...” she chuckled and then switched places with Ashlyn again.

“So is it a direct measurement of the amount of testosterone you have in your body or what?” the keeper teased. “The more manly you are the more boy babies you make? That’s how it works, right?”

“Absolutely” he nodded and grinned before glancing at his wife who just smiled softly at him.

“I’m not supposed to tell you this, but he really wanted a little girl this time...”

“Sydney...” Dom chastised, embarrassed.

“And that’s why I love him so much” Ali offered with a warm, sincere smile. “He’s man enough to want baby girls. I can’t think of a dad who’d be better with a daughter.”

“See honey” Sydney reached for his hand and he took it, still blushing a bit at the revelation. “I told you they’d get it. They love you just as much as I do, they just don’t want you the same way” she giggled and he blushed again.

“Alright love, let’s focus on the wee one, shall we?” he tried to deflect the conversation away from himself.

“So how are you?” Ali asked the coach, brushing some of the hair away from her face and smiling at her.

“I’m good. This C-section thing is a cake-walk compared to the other two births. Where has this been all my life?” she chuckled and rolled her eyes.

Sydney and Dr. Comello had planned and worked for another natural, vaginal delivery but the coach’s body started to show signs of distress three weeks ago. Much like Ashlyn with the twins, Sydney’s blood pressure started to get too high and it stayed too high so Dr. Comello had to do a scheduled C-section a week early. 

“Yeah, well, your incision will bother you longer than your vajayjay did after James” Ali replied with a warning look. “I get what you’re saying but it’s not exactly a walk in the park either.”

“I know, you’ve both already told me how frustrating it is to get home and not be able to pick the baby up. That is definitely going to drive me crazy.”

“Yes it will” Ashlyn chimed in. “But you’ll have lots of help those first three weeks, we promise.”

“Whatever you need boo, I can come pick the boys up and keep them for a while, whenever you need it. Don’t be shy, please. Or I’ll just start coming and getting them whenever I feel like it” she giggled and squeezed Sydney’s shoulder.

“And that’s why you’re the best godparents in the world” she beamed up at her best friend, getting emotional. “Seriously, thanks guys. I know we’re going to need help and between you guys and my mom I know we’ll be ok.”

“Whit and Ryan are great too” Ashlyn suggested with a shrug. “They’ve saved our butts a million times.”

“When are they going to get busy and have a kid?” the coach asked as she picked her son up and, after Ali helped her with the burp cloth, settled him against her shoulder to try and burp him.

“Ummm...” Ashlyn stammered nervously. “Soon, I think. I mean, umm she wants to have a baby before she’s 40 so...”

“God you’re an awful liar” Dom laughed and nudged her with his knee.

“Oooooh, so they’re already trying?” Sydney’s eyebrows went up in excitement. “That’s awesome.” She studied the keeper’s pink face some more and noticed that Ali hadn’t said one word about the subject. “Is she already fucking pregnant?!”

“No!” Ashlyn answered quickly, shaking her head. “At least, not that I know of.” She sighed dramatically and whined like a five-year old as she continued. “You guys...I’m not supposed to say anything, I promised...”

“Well you didn’t say a word” Dom grinned up at her.

“And you, Miss Thing” Sydney poked her bestie with her elbow, “you just took yourself out of that whole conversation didn’t you?” she giggled, which made Ali finally look up and chuckle too.

“What? What? I’m sorry, I was temporarily deaf and mute. What’s happening?” Ali joked, relieved that was over with. “Sorry Syd, I can’t lie to you, but it’s not my news to tell.”

“I get it, but what you’re saying is that they’re going to need to get some good practice time in, pretty soon, right?” she quirked her eyebrow at Ashlyn first and then Ali.

“You didn’t hear it from me” the keeper finally said, “but, yeah.”

“Perfect, they’re hired” Sydney finally got her newborn son to burp and looked at her husband. 

“Can I hold him?” Ali asked softly.

“Course you can Alibaba...always” the coach smiled at her friend and let her lift the baby off of her chest and snuggle him up against her own.

“So...did you stick with Maddox?” Ashlyn asked. “Or did you change your minds?”

“No, we stuck with it” Dom grinned and then looked at his wife. “She still thinks there are too many x’s in his name...”

“One x per person honey” she shook her head. “One x per person.”

“I love it” Ali commented as she watched the tiny human try to adjust to his new surroundings. “Maddox Leroux Dwyer will just make it cool to have two x’s, that’s all.”

“I know it means ‘fortunate one’ but wasn’t there a story behind it or something?” Ashlyn asked, trying to remember what Ali had explained to her before.

“Maddox technically means ‘son of Madoc’ or ‘Madog’ and it’s an old Welsh name” Dom explained. “Madoc was a legendary Welsh prince who became famous for sailing west and discovering America long before Columbus did, at least according to the Welsh” he grinned. “We’ve got Welsh blood on my father’s side and we grew up, as he did, hearing about Prince Madoc and his adventures in the New World. There’s no proof that it’s anything more than a fairy tale though, unfortunately” he chuckled. “But it made for some very entertaining stories when we would go visit the relatives.”

“It doesn’t mean fortunate?” the keeper frowned, confused. She thought for sure she had got that part right.

“Yeah, it does actually” Dom clarified. “I guess that’s the meaning of it and ‘son of Madoc’ is where it came from. That’s how I should have said it.”

“It was just too perfect” Sydney added, her voice tired but happy as she watched Ali holding her baby boy. “It’s an old family name with a cool legendary prince attached to it. And then it means fortunate one, and that’s just what he is. We feel so lucky and blessed to have our surprise baby, we’re the fortunate ones.”

“And we had picked out Leroux right away. She had a tough time choosing between it and Kenneth when James was born” Dom smiled at Sydney again as he squeezed her hand. “So this time, we had that picked out right from the very start, whether it was a boy or a girl.”

Ashlyn walked over and stood next to her wife so she could get a good look at their newest godchild. After a few minutes of listening to the soft sounds he was making she spoke up again.

“Is it me or does he look exactly like your other two?”

Dom laughed out loud.

“Yeah, nobody can ever accuse the mailman” Sydney laughed with her husband. “What can I say? We are a literal baby making factory. We keep churning ‘em out, carbon copies” they all laughed.

“Well if it ain’t broke...” Ashlyn said softly as the baby wrinkled his face up at the laughter and then tried to get peaceful again.

“Why mess with perfection?” Ali agreed with a huge, nose-crinkling grin.

//

It had taken two years for it to affect her, but Ashlyn’s life finally had slowed down enough so that her heart and mind and body all missed playing soccer. Of course she had a few tears and some sad, emotional, doubt-filled moments the very first time the Breakers preseason rolled around after retirement, but it hadn’t been too bad. She thought she had just been one of the lucky few who had been able to walk away without feeling like she had more to give. She chalked it up to timing when two Marches went by without some sort of depressed funk descending on her. She must have really been ready to hang up her boots if she had been able to survive a month of March without missing training camp and the excitement and promise of a new season. Ashlyn hadn’t played in the NWSL since Saturday, September 4th, 2021. She had been splitting starts with Abby Smith that season as the team tried to right the ship after the big Championship win and Whitney’s retirement at the end of the season before. Her last game had been a Lifetime TV game of the week and the Breakers were playing at Vancouver against the Greys. Thank God Boston had won and Ashlyn had played well. She had no way of knowing it would be her last game and she was grateful, in retrospect, that it had been a decent one. Her last game at home, in that beautiful stadium she loved so much, had been Saturday, August 21st, 2021 when the Breakers hosted the LA Strikers. That had been an amazing day and, as she looked back on it, she was glad that was her last home game. Meg was there with them and walked out for the pregame with Ashlyn, she was 9 years old that summer. Ashlyn getting a start, at home, while Meg was there was not easy to make happen, but they had been lucky that day. It was also the first game Josie ever went to, and she was just over two months old. It made the keeper sad to think her daughter only saw her play once – and she knew the baby hadn’t even really seen her at all.

The first March, in 2022, Ashlyn had told the team she was retired but not the public yet. She had jumped right into setting up the Mental Health Initiative and spent a lot of time that month working with Helen Siegfriedt to get the organization incorporated and officially started. Penny Cross was born and James Dwyer was christened that month. And she had helped Whitney and Ryan move into their new condo in Arlington too. It was no wonder she hadn’t felt any training camp pangs that year. The second March, in 2023, last year, she was 7 months pregnant with the twins and they had completely re-arranged the big old house to make room for them. They moved the office to the garage, moved Meg’s room up to the third floor, moved Josie up to the front bedroom and got the nursery set up. She and Ali took a breastfeeding class that month and even managed to go to Satellite Beach for Tammye’s 60th birthday party. Again, not surprising that she was too busy to dwell on the training camp she was missing.

But this year there wasn’t as much going on, aside from helping Dom and Sydney as much as they could, while keeping up with their own four kids. Ashlyn’s Breakers responsibilities picked up once the season started in April but the keeper found herself spending a lot of time at the stadium that March and she really wasn’t sure why. Everyone was always glad to see her and have her around. The goalkeeper coach jokingly, she thought, warned her that he was going to put her to work if she kept hanging around.

“I was wondering when it was going to really hit you” Whitney smiled at her best friend as they sat together in her office at Knight-Harris. The lawyer got up and walked around her desk, leaning back against the front of it so she could put her hand on Ashlyn’s shoulder as she sat in the chair there. “Apparently it’s different for everybody. That’s what I’ve heard anyway. I knew there was going to be more to it than what you experienced that very first March – that was just too easy. It didn’t feel right.”

“Yeah, I thought I did pretty good. I mean, I really thought that was it. I was upset and sad and I questioned my decision...”

“But you didn’t completely lose your shit, did you?” Whitney clarified softly as the keeper shook her head no.

“When did it hit you? I thought it was the very next season?” Ashlyn looked up with worried eyes.

“It was. It killed me that first March. Training camp started and I didn’t go. I didn’t see my teammates. I didn’t get to play the game I loved more than anything else up to that point in my life. I didn’t see my best friend every day at the stadium...”

“Fuck” the keeper groaned and closed her eyes for a few seconds. She took a deep breath and opened her eyes again, looking intently at Whitney. “Well how long does it last?”

“Ash” the lawyer shook her head sadly and squeezed the keeper’s shoulder again. “It’s not a set time. Come on, you know this...”

“I thought I knew it” she whined. “But then it didn’t happen and I just thought...”

“What? That you were immune to missing soccer?” Whitney laughed and pulled the chair next to the keeper over before sitting down in it and leaning forward. “Ashlyn, come on” she said softly. “You’re going to have to grieve this loss just like the rest of us. There’s no miracle cure for the pain. It hurts. And it sucks. But it’ll get better.”

“What did you do to make it a little easier” the keeper asked in a small, resigned voice.

“Oh I don’t know” she exhaled and sat back in her chair as she thought for a minute. “Dirty truth?”

“Please.”

“I was so busy with law school that I didn’t have too much time to think about it. But, I guess, going to the games helped me feel closer to it. So on those days when I was really missing it and feeling lost without it, or the girls, I’d text or call one of them. But, remember, I had you. You helped me so much through all of that because you were still doing it and I kind of lived vicariously through you on the hard days.”

“Well fuck.”

“I’m sorry Ash, I really am” Whitney frowned at her upset bestie. “I’m here for you, always, but maybe you should try to feed off of Kristie or Abby or Rose – someone still playing. They’ll help you out.”

“Yeah, Kristie’s next” Ashlyn replied thoughtfully, referring to Mewis’ club-only announcement that this was to be her last season. Somehow the feisty, talented midfielder was going to hit the ripe old age of 33 this year. “Maybe she’ll take pity on me knowing she’ll be in the same boat next season.”

“I’m not trying to be a jerk” Whitney paused. “But maybe you should talk to Mattie about it too. Just in case, you know...”

“Just in case I go crazy again?” the keeper met her best friend’s concerned gaze with sadness and a little frustration in her own eyes.

“I didn’t mean it like that...”

“I know” the keeper gave her a half-smile and nervously grabbed the back of her own neck with one hand. “I know.” 

“You’ve loved soccer all your life Ash” the lawyer leaned forward again and put both hands onto Ashlyn’s knees in front of her. “You’re losing one of your first loves and one of your greatest loves...it’s ok if it throws you for a loop. It sure did me.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I can’t run from it or hide from it...”

“Is that what you’ve been doing?”

“No” Ashlyn answered quickly. “At least, I don’t think so, not on purpose anyway...” she furrowed her brow as she thought hard about the question. “No, I think I was just too damned busy the last two training camps. This year is different, less hectic, and I’m feeling it now.”

“You’ll get through it, I know you will” Whitney smiled encouragingly at the keeper. “Just keep talking about it and telling me what you need so I can help. That’s all. Ok?”

“Ok. Thanks Whit. I love you bestie.”

//

On a Saturday, half-way through the month of March, the whole, young Krieger family sat around the nook table eating lunch. Ashlyn sat on the banquette seat, next to the end of the table where Dodge sat in his highchair. Drew sat on the banquette seat next to Ashlyn, he didn’t need a booster seat anymore and they allowed him to kneel on the banquette seat if he wanted to and was well-behaved. Ali sat in one of the chairs across from Drew and Ashlyn, with Lily in her highchair on one side of her and Josie in a booster seat strapped to a chair on the other side of her. This way each mom was responsible for one twin who still needed lots of supervision while they ate their finger foods. Dodge, in particular, was always stuffing too much food into his mouth and sometimes choking. And each mom also could help either Josie or Drew when they needed it. It was a good system for them and it had worked well so far. Drew was a fussy eater and it drove both women crazy. They had read about how to develop better eaters and rule number one was to eat together and sit around the same table as often as possible. So they did their very best, hoping to get Drew on a better track and avoid the fussy eating problem with the three youngest kids.

“Mama, can I be done?” Drew whined for the second time in ten minutes.

“Not until you eat three more big bites of chicken and all of your carrots” Ashlyn replied evenly, trying not to let her frustration show. She had just given him the exact same answer ten minutes ago and he hadn’t done anything except push the chicken pieces around his plate with two baby carrots, one in each hand. “Don’t ask again. Just eat your lunch please.”

Ali knew that the kids not eating their meals was her wife’s biggest parenting issue. The keeper had absolutely no patience for it. Part of her attitude about it came from growing up with not as much to eat as some other kids and Ali was always sensitive to that part of Ashlyn’s past. Part of her attitude about it came from just finding the whole concept of not eating perfectly good food for no reason at all, extraordinarily rude, disrespectful, wasteful and stupid. It incensed Ashlyn when Drew told one of them what he wanted to eat for breakfast, often choosing from the three things they offered him, and then as soon as they put the plate of waffles or bowl of cereal or toast with the crusts cut off and three different types of jam or peanut butter or Nutella on top in front of him he turned his nose up at it and said he wanted something else instead. It was ‘being a kid 101’ but the keeper couldn’t stand it. She was unfailingly patient with her kids in almost every other regard, but the food thing was her weak spot and she knew it. Ashlyn almost always told Drew no and told him he had to eat what she had made for him. Sometimes he did but most times he sat there and pouted all through breakfast while everybody else ate. Finally, when the only other option was to send the boy to preschool on an empty stomach, the keeper would make him his other choice, making sure he knew that she was unhappy about it and telling him for the millionth time that he had to stop doing that. 

Ali completely understood where her wife was coming from but she had a harder time toeing the party line when it came to feeding the kids. It bothered her more to think of them being hungry and not getting enough to eat. It was a problem for them both and easily the thing they disagreed on the most when it came to the kids. They didn’t technically disagree. They just had different breaking points. 

“More peees” Josie asked adorably, tilting her head back and forth.

“More apples?” Ali asked as she reached for more apple slices from the plate in the middle of the table that none of the kids could reach except Drew if he got on his knees and used his full reach. “Or more grapes?”

“Ap-ples...peees” she answered and clasped her hands together expectantly.

“Here you go little one” the brunette put three more apple slices in the little compartment of the kid-plate where the first serving of apples and grapes had been. “Thank you for being so polite. I love that. Don’t forget to eat your carrots too Jose.”

Lily and Dodge were happily chewing away, both fists full of pasta, tiny shells, and little bits of meatballs. They both had red sauce covering most of their faces and both hands, as well as the bibs they wore. Feeding 10-month old babies was a messy proposition and there was no way around it. Lily let out a big sigh and then a yawn and rubbed her eye with a messy, saucy fist. She banged both hands on the tray of the highchair and pushed her sippy cup onto the floor.

“Ok Lily girl, are you all done?” Ali asked and, when the baby nodded and squawked out an affirmative sound, she released the tray and carried it quickly to the kitchen sink. She was back a minute later with a wet washcloth and started to wipe her daughter’s hands and arms and face off. “There she is” the brunette giggled. “Underneath all of this sauce is my sweet Lily” she cooed as she carefully removed her bib and placed it on the table, out of reach.

“That’s too much Dodger” Ashlyn reached over and took the large fistful of food out of his hand as he already chewed a mouth full of pasta and meatballs with a grin on his face. “You know it’s too much” the keeper returned his grin and kissed the back of the hand she had just emptied. “If you put too much food in your mouth you’ll choke. We can’t have that, now can we?” she made a silly face at him and he laughed, spitting out a small amount of meatball in the process. “Ok, ok” she chuckled. “Just chew your food big guy.”

“Mommy, can I be done?” Drew tried the weaker link.

“Drew” Ali cocked her head at him from across the table where she was just finishing wiping Lily off. “You know the answer to that. Now quit stalling and eat your lunch.”

“Two bites of chicken?” he whined, hopefully.

“No” Ali answered him before Ashlyn had a chance to. “Three bites. Here...” she leaned across the table and found three medium sized bites of chicken and pushed them towards him, moving the other three bites of chicken farther away from him. “Eat those up now, come on. You’ll never get any bigger if you don’t eat buddy.”

He kicked his heels hard against the wood base of the banquette seat as he put a piece of chicken into his mouth and started chewing.

“Don’t kick the seat” Ashlyn corrected him sternly.

Ali shot her a quick look to let her know that wasn’t helping the situation.

“I done Mama?” Josie asked sweetly and looked at the keeper.

“Yes JoJo you can be done” she smiled warmly at her daughter after looking at her mostly empty kid plate. “Thank you for eating your lunch little one, you did a great job.”

Ali had just put Lily down on the floor and watched her crawl towards Fred over by the family room couch. She took the washcloth, found a clean area on it, and wiped Josie’s mouth and hands which were much cleaner than her sister’s had been. What a difference two years and a kid-sized fork could make.

“Good job Drew” the brunette praised as she unhooked Josie from the booster seat, brushed some bits of meatball and pasta from her lap onto the floor and then picked the redhead up. “Only one piece left. You can do it. Then you’ll just have some carrots to eat and you’ll be done.”

Dodge started banging on his tray just like Lily had done a few minutes earlier, but he added the aggressive move of wiping his arms back and forth across his food covered tray as if he was trying to clean it all off. He made a lot of noises and sounds and started bouncing up and down on his bum. 

“Easy little man” Ashlyn put her hand on his shoulder and smiled at him. “Relax...”

“Done!” he replied, loudly and clearly, to his stunned parents’ amazement.

Ashlyn looked over at Ali who was still standing there holding Josie and they exchanged shocked but happy smiles.

“Are you done Dodge?” Ali asked excitedly, grinning like an idiot at the sauce-covered boy.

“Done!” he repeated and pushed his sippy cup onto the floor.

“Did you guys hear that?” Ashlyn turned to Drew who had a smile on his face despite his carrot predicament. “Dodge said his first word!” she grinned so big her dimple appeared. “Way to go Dodger!”

Ali picked up the dirty washcloth and kissed Dodge’s head on her way to the kitchen sink, still holding a sleepy Josie.

“Good boy Dodge. I can’t believe you just said your first word” she gushed before walking to the sink, rinsing out the washcloth, getting it wet again, and returning to the table, still smiling. She tossed the washcloth to her wife and they shared another big smile. But they couldn’t just stop and stare at him like they wanted to. It was naptime for the three littlest kids and they were all tired. “I’m going to put her down and then come back for Lily.”

“Thanks hon” Ashlyn replied as she started to wipe down the new talker who was also yawning now. “I’ll bring him up once I get him hosed off” she chuckled.

“Are you really gonna use the hose on him” Drew asked suspiciously, having seen both his moms routinely use the hose on the dogs after a trip to the beach.

“Nah” she chuckled again. “But sometimes I think it would be easier, don’t you?” she looked at her oldest son and was relieved beyond belief that he only had two baby carrots left to eat before meeting his ‘being done’ requirement. “You could hold him for me and then I could just hose him down...”

“But mama, you would get me too” he explained with a little frown as he took a bite of carrot.

“Do you think so?” she asked playfully as she kept working quickly on Dodge. “You wouldn’t mind though, would you?” she winked at him and he giggled when he realized she was teasing him. “Can you believe your baby brother just said his very first word, ever? I can’t believe it. And we were all here together to hear it.”

“Dodgie, Dodgie” Drew repeated the name trying to get his brother’s attention. When Dodge finally focused his eyes on the older boy, Drew continued. “Are you done?”

“Done” he said for the third time in his young life and gave his big brother a huge grin.

Ashlyn thought she was going to cry at the sweet interaction between the two boys. Dodge was definitely not always Drew’s favorite person, especially now that he was able to crawl and get into more of Drew’s things. She leaned over and kissed the top of Drew’s head.

“I love you buddy. Thank you for eating your lunch” she glanced at his plate and saw that he was one carrot shy of completion. “You can be done now too if you want.”

“Thanks Mama” he patted her arm and slid all the way around to the other end of the banquette seat so he could leave the table.

“Wash your hands Drew! Wash your hands” she yelled after him as he made a beeline for the front living room and his toys.

“Done” Dodge said one more time, getting fussy from being tired, ready for his nap, and still stuck in his highchair.

“Ok big boy” Ashlyn cooed as she picked him up and kissed him on the cheek. “Let’s get your diaper changed and have a nap, ok?” She walked through the family room and chuckled as she saw Lily lying with her head on Fred’s shoulder, talking to him in her baby mumbles and yawning. “You’re next baby girl.”

//

It only took Lily twelve more days to utter her first word. Everything Ali and Ashlyn had read about twins told them that they usually motivated each other to achieve their milestones and tried to keep up once one of them did break new ground. You could almost see Lily trying to form words, frowning with the effort and then being upset and frustrated with the outcome. Dodge had added a couple of other words to his vocabulary in the same time and Lily seemed desperate to catch up. Neither of her moms put any pressure on her though. They both told her that it wouldn’t be long and she would talk when her mouth was ready. With the amount of time and energy she spent playing with and following around the dogs, everybody was sure Lily would say ‘doggie’ or ‘puppy’ or maybe even ‘Fred’ or ‘Persey’. But that was not the case. At all. 

The typical morning routine those days was for everybody to be up and eating breakfast in the nook at 7am. This included Ali and Ashlyn. Which meant that Ali had to be all ready to go to work, dressed and made-up for her day, before the breakfast chaos began. They spent a half hour feeding everybody, then a half hour getting Drew and Josie dressed so they could leave the house at 8:15am with Ali. Drew got dropped off at his nearby preschool just before 8:30 and then Josie got dropped off at daycare in Lynnfield just before 9am, if traffic wasn’t too bad. Then the brunette would continue into Cambridge to the Knight-Harris offices for the day. The two keys to success were to keep the big kids moving, and to keep Ali’s outfit clean. Neither was easy but there were tricks they learned to help with each. At 7:30, or as close as possible, each mom would take a big kid to the kitchen sink to get cleaned up and then upstairs to get dressed. The twins enjoyed a half hour of playtime, usually sequestered in the front living room with a morning show to hold their attention for thirty minutes or so. 

Divide and conquer was the motto for the two moms and if one of them was having a particularly tough time getting a certain kid dressed they would just switch off. There wasn’t time for arguments or lines to be drawn in the sand. As Drew got older he had more opinions about what he wore each day and they finally had to start limiting some of his options. They would present him with three choices for a shirt instead of just letting him rifle through his whole drawer. That way they let him keep his blossoming autonomy but streamlined the getting dressed process. Josie, thankfully, wasn’t that fussy yet but they knew it was right around the corner. The second trick to success had been Ashlyn’s idea and it was one of her very best. She had often used artist smocks in her studio when she painted or worked with stains that would ruin clothes. After failing miserably at keeping Ali’s outfit clean during the breakfast zoo, the blonde finally thought of just covering her wife’s outfit up altogether. There were now five or six smocks hanging on a hook in the pantry that Ali, or Ashlyn if she was the one leaving early for the day, would use to cover the top half of her body while she fed the kids in the morning. Genius plan. And, so far, Ali had only worn it to work once, rolling her eyes and blushing with embarrassment as she thought about how neither the preschool drop-off teacher nor the daycare administrator had commented on it. 

“Wooooo woooooo” Whitney had teased her when Ali had stopped by her open office door to ask about a contract. She had just stepped off the elevator and was on her way to her own office, having just arrived and parked. “Schnazzy outfit” the lawyer wagged her eyebrows playfully at the confused brunette. “I like it.”

Ashlyn got up with anybody who awoke before 7am, which was sometimes Dodge, but usually not anybody. She also ended up waking up most of the kids most days while Ali rushed to get her own morning routine completed in time. The keeper got the big kids started with breakfast if Ali wasn’t downstairs yet, which surprisingly didn’t happen that often. The brunette knew how hard breakfast was with two of them and that it became ten times harder with only one parent on hand so she tried her very best to be downstairs at 7am. Ashlyn breastfed Lily while Ali fed Dodge his bottle, both of them up and down out of their seats for that first half hour getting Drew and Josie what they needed. Sometimes the blonde would sit in the nook with both babies and feed them at the same time, breast for Lily and bottle for Dodge, which freed Ali up to be more efficient with Drew and Josie and their meals. This wouldn’t work if Dodge wouldn’t sit still though. It was probably about a 50/50 split of days when that worked and when it didn’t. Ashlyn waited until she was cleaning up the breakfast mess to eat something herself, most days, because she tried to make sure her wife put something good into her system before racing out the door. After Ali and the big kids left, the keeper would set the twins up in their highchairs at the nook and feed them their breakfast which was their finger foods and solids. The house was shockingly quiet during that half hour compared to the din that preceded it. 

Getting the twins dressed was usually not that big a deal. The keeper brought down clothes for them and just changed them right there in the front living room while they played with their toys on the floor, yammering away at each other with their animated sounds and noises. 

On Thursday, March 28th Ashlyn sat down on the floor and changed Dodge’s diaper and his outfit. Trading the adorable one-piece puppy dog pajamas for long blue sweatpants and a long-sleeved, green and blue striped shirt. None of their kids liked to wear socks in the house so she didn’t even try anymore. She turned her attention to miss Lily who had been a little fussier than usual that morning. She didn’t nurse as long as she normally did and had cried when Ashlyn put her in her highchair for breakfast after the big kids were gone. 

“Ok sweetpea, let’s get you dressed” Ashlyn said sweetly and kissed the top of her head, covered in short, dirty blonde curls. 

The 10-month old girl was not cooperative, in the least. She fought Ashlyn tooth and nail and had she started fighting before the keeper got her pajamas off of her then she would have let her just stay in them for a while longer. But Lily waited until she was completely naked, diaper in the middle of being changed, to become difficult.

“Lily, hold still” Ashlyn instructed in a stern but not angry voice. “We’d be done by now if you’d quit squirming around.” The keeper struggled some more, almost able to get the new diaper in place but taking a heel to the chin for her efforts as Lily flailed her legs up at her mama. “Ow! Lily, that’s enough. Do not kick me” her voice was exasperated and starting to get angry. “Be still...”

“No!”

“I mean it” the blonde continued, trying to stay as patient as possible. “Let me get your diaper on you...”

“No!” Lily said again, just as clearly as she had the first time.

Ashlyn leaned back with her jaw on the floor and her eyes wide. She reached onto the coffee table for her phone so she could try and record their youngest child’s first word for Ali, pressing record and moving the phone closer to the edge. She was back hovering over the baby and trying to get her diaper secure once and for all.

“Did you just say your first word Lily girl?” she asked, beaming down at her daughter, magically not angry with her any more. “I’m so proud of you sweetpea!” she enthused. Lily responded with a wet raspberry sound and giggled as she continued to make her mama’s job difficult. “Honey, please hold still for mama, please?”

“No” she giggled again and grinned.

Dodge had crawled over to see what all the commotion was about and proceeded to sit on his bum right next to his sister and watch things unfold. It was almost as if he had heard the word come out of her mouth and couldn’t believe it. Like he had to see it for himself.

“Dodge, your sister is being a brat but she said her first word! How cool is that?” the keeper couldn’t keep the excitement out of her voice and laughed out loud when her son clapped his hands and smiled up at her.

“Mama” he said and grinned again.

“No” Lily chimed in with the one and only word she had mastered.

Dodge looked at his sister and giggled when he heard the word firsthand. This made Lily giggle again and before long the two babies were laughing their faces off at each other while Ashlyn recorded the sweet moment on her phone.

“You goofballs” she chuckled and shook her head. “I just love you so much.”


	6. Eclipse

Ashlyn Krieger wasn’t much of a scientist, but she loved the miracles that presented themselves every single day in a thousand different ways in nature. She was always telling the kids to stop and look at something or commenting about how beautiful a certain flower was during one of their walks or how pretty the sky looked. She firmly believed, as did Ali, in living a life of gratitude and that started with the simplest of all things – looking outside your window and being thankful for the sun or the leaves or the ocean. It had been the keeper’s idea originally but she found many willing participants very quickly and before they knew it, the four families, along with some tag-along extended family members, were on their way up to Burlington, Vermont to watch the solar eclipse. Molly Cross had come through for them again, finding an old, but clean, motel that had been tested out and reviewed by her company just two years prior. It was the type of two-story motel where you parked your car right in front of your room and where you could hear everything going on in the rooms next to you. There were two double beds in each room, a dresser with a tv on top of it, a small desk and a small bathroom. That was it. No refrigerators, nothing fancy, just bare bones sleeping accommodations. The motel was right in the path of totality so they wouldn’t have to drive anywhere to experience the eclipse. Well, except they had to drive almost four hours to Burlington, Vermont. 

They packed everybody up and decided to make a long weekend of it because the eclipse was on Monday afternoon, April 8th. Different parts of the large group arrived on Saturday and some didn’t arrive until Sunday, practically filling the entire motel just with their large group. The more people they told about their plans, the more people decided to join them. Some folks just thought it was a good excuse for a visit too. Whitney’s parents flew out from Southern California for the ‘eclipse trip’ as they began to call it. Tammye and Carol flew up from Florida, Ryan’s sister came up from Long Island and Kyle and Nathan took the train up to be a part of it as well. Deb and Mike Christopher were already planning to be in their Manchester, MA condo that weekend because they were leaving from Logan airport in Boston for their big trip to Italy four days after the eclipse. Ken and Vicki made the trip, as did Sandi Leroux. It was a full house, for sure.

The motel was on the outskirts of South Burlington, technically between the small towns of Shelburne, VT and Hinesburg, VT. There was a big open field behind the motel and the families spent lots of time playing soccer and all sorts of other games out there while they waited for Monday at 2:14pm when the partial eclipse would begin. It was still cold up in Northern Vermont – they were only 45 miles from the Canadian border. The temperature during the day was in the mid-40s, dropping down into the mid to low 30s at night. The sun, which was out and cooperative during their three-day stay, warmed things up considerably, but the chilly wind that blew down on them from the North, and across beautiful Lake Champlain on the border between New York State and Vermont, kept everybody’s winter jackets on them for most of the time. The silver lining was that the chilly weather made the lack of mini-fridges not such a big deal.

“I can’t believe we’re going to see a total eclipse tomorrow” Ali whispered to her wife, careful not to wake the sleeping Dodge who was tucked into Ashlyn’s arm as she lay on her back. Ali was tucked into Ashlyn’s other arm with her leg across her keeper’s hips and her arms across her stomach. Drew and Josie were fast asleep in the other double bed, miles of space between them, and Lily was asleep in the portable crib wedged between the two beds, down by the foot of the beds. Dodge had been fussy and they were afraid he was going to wake his twin sister up so Ali brought him into bed with them until he settled down. “I’m really excited.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know it hasn’t been easy” Ashlyn whispered back and rolled her eyes.

“No, I mean it babe, I can’t wait to see it. It’s a once in a lifetime thing and I think it’s awesome that you got us all up here for it” she lifted her head off of her keeper’s shoulder and kissed her chin. “For real.”

“You’re not just saying that to make me feel better?”

“No way. If there had been an eclipse anywhere near us when we were kids I’d like to think one of my parents would have made it happen, but I really don’t know” the brunette offered thoughtfully. “I love that we’re doing this for the kids. They’ll never forget it.”

“Your mom totally would have taken you and Kyle” Ashlyn nodded, still keeping her voice to a whisper. “No doubt.”

“It’s too bad Chris and Beth couldn’t come. And your dad...”

“Not after the big Disney adventure” the keeper chuckled softly. “They only travelled 75 miles but it was a huge trip for all of them. Chris said he’s waiting for the one in 2045 that’ll pass right through central Florida...”

“That’s when the next total solar eclipse is?” Ali was surprised.

“Yep, the next one that comes to the East Coast of the USA anyway.”

“Wow, so this really truly is a once in a lifetime thing” Ali smiled and squeezed her keeper.

“Well, we’ll only be 60 or so in 2045 and I’d like to go to that one too. I think Satellite Beach is right in the path of totality. How cool is that?” she paused. “Unless you’re planning on not travelling once you hit the big 6-0 or something?”

“Of course not silly” she chuckled. “That sounds wonderful. Thank you honey, for 2045 and for this trip.”

“Oh sure thank me now but you were cursing me out this morning” she chuckled again. “God that was funny” she shook her head.

“Ha ha ha” the brunette poked her wife in the ribs.

“Ow!”

“Shhhhh!”

“Well what’d you poke me for?” Ashlyn giggled and squeezed her wife against her side, relishing her warmth. “It’s not my fault all four of our children decided to join you in the bathroom this morning while you tried to take care of business.”

“Ugh” Ali groaned quietly and felt her cheeks get pink. She was grateful to be able to hide her blush of embarrassment in the darkness of the room. “Why would you bring that up?”

“Honey, that’s a funny story no matter who it happens to. You have to admit that” she unsuccessfully tilted her head to try and see Ali’s face. “Any one of us would have cracked up if we walked back into our motel room, having been gone for only 5 minutes, to find our wife on the toilet with four children keeping her company” she giggled again. “Oh, the fact that it was you, of all people, is just too perfect.”

“Yeah, well, I’m going to the lobby to get the second cups of coffee tomorrow morning and you can try and poop with Dodge on your lap and Josie bossing Lily around through a tea party at your feet, all while Drew is interrogating you about exactly what’s going to happen at precisely what time for the rest of the day.”

“That’s a deal, baby. That’s more than fair” she chuckled softly and kissed her wife’s brunette head. “God I love you.”

Monday turned out to be a very long day full of anticipation and agonizing waiting. But the eclipse was truly incredible and every single person in their crazy big group was glad they had made the trip. Even the littlest kids were excited, not knowing what the heck was really happening but still understanding that it was something special. The whole area turned into a gigantic clusterfuck of traffic as the thousands of people who had flocked to Burlington and its surrounding small towns tried to make their way back to where they came from. Ashlyn and the rest of their group had planned to sleep over one more night and drive home Tuesday morning and they were all thankful they could just sit and relax that evening instead of having to deal with the mess on the roads. Whitney’s parents could not get over how great the keeper was with her kids.

“Ashlyn, I hope I haven’t made you uncomfortable these past couple of days” Mrs. Engen said as they sat around Whitney and Ryan’s room after dinner Monday evening. “But I just can’t stop watching you with all of your beautiful children. I knew you’d make a wonderful mother, but I can’t get over how good you are with them.”

“Aw, thanks Mrs. E” Ashlyn blushed and looked down. “I love them like crazy but they would absolutely drive me nuts if I didn’t get a lot of help from Whit and Ryan and some of our other friends.” She looked up and smiled at both Whitney and Mrs. Engen. “I seriously couldn’t do it without them. And Ali, of course. I mean, let’s be honest...she’s the ringleader of our circus” she grinned.

“Where did this curly, dirty blonde hair come from with the twins?” the older woman asked with a twinkle in her eye. “They’re so adorable and beautiful...”

“I know, right?” Whitney interrupted with a smirk. “No way they came from this old hag” she pointed her thumb towards Ashlyn and laughed, as did her best friend and her mother.

“I’m not an expert on genetics, by any stretch...” the keeper began.

“Geez, she leads us up to watch one eclipse and all of a sudden she’s a scientific expert...” the lawyer tried to get another playful dig in but Ashlyn threw a pillow at her and shut her up before she could finish.

“But we think the donor must have had dark blonde, curly hair in his DNA. There’s no other explanation for it. My natural color is a light brown and my brother’s is a little darker brown. Mom’s natural color is brown and my dad was sort of dirty blonde but never curly. There are no curls anywhere in my family tree” she chuckled.

“Isn’t that interesting” Mrs. Engen leaned forward on the other bed to try and get a good look at Ashlyn’s face. “Do they get their eye color from him too do you think?”

“Mom, don’t you think this is a little...personal?” Whitney carefully chided her mother, afraid she was digging too deep.

“No, Whit” Ashlyn smiled warmly at both women. “Honestly, I don’t mind at all. Ali and I talk about it all the time because we never know quite what’s going to happen with any of them” she shrugged her shoulders. “We used the same donor, on purpose, so we could at least sort of have a constant to work with” she explained. “But we’re just as curious as you are about what they’ll look like.”

“Are you sure you don’t mind talking about this?” Mrs. Engen asked with a kind tilt of her head.

“I swear, I don’t mind. We don’t do it in front of the kids just in case it might bother one of them. We’ll figure that part out as they get older – you know, what to tell them. But I’m just as fascinated by it as you are. Ask away.”

“Their eyes...” she started to bring up the last question she asked.

“Right, yeah, their eyes have changed a lot the last few months. They were both a light blue when they were born, which is not that unusual. Drew’s eyes were a darker blue when he was born and his eyes are brown now, just like Ali’s. He’s basically a carbon copy of her except that he’s a boy” the keeper smiled at the thought of her beautiful wife. “Josie had light blue eyes when she was born, just like the twins, but hers turned a dark blue, almost like Drew’s were when he was first born. But we don’t understand where the heck her red hair came from either so we’re not sure her eyes are done changing. She’s our wildcard for sure.”

“I think Lily has your eyes” Whitney said with a smile.

“I agree” her mother chimed in with her own grin.

“Yeah, me too” Ashlyn giggled. “Which makes me so happy because I have my Gram’s eyes...”

“Oh my God Ash” Whitney’s eyes were wide and her face excited. “I never thought about that. That’s the best.”

“I love it” the keeper smiled sheepishly. “I know that sounds vain, but I love it because she has Gram’s eyes, not because she has mine.”

“We know” the lawyer smiled back at her best friend.

“And Dodge looks like he’s going to have my dad’s beautiful blue eyes. They’re darkening up a bit, not nearly as dark as Josie’s, but darker than they were when he was born. We’ll have to see what happens.”

“And the adorable dimple” Mrs. Engen shook her head and chuckled. “It seems like they’ve both got it or is that just wishful thinking on my part?”

“No” Ashlyn laughed. “According to my mom, that’s what it looks like when you’re a baby and you’ve got the dimple happening. My nephew Johnny has it too – he looks just like Chris, poor little kid” she winked and giggled at her own joke.

“I’m happy Ali finally got her baby with the Harris dimple” Whitney chuckled. “I don’t think she cared about anything else as long as she got at least one dimple.”

“You’re absolutely right” Ashlyn laughed again. “She was so jealous of Johnny’s dimple. I used to tease her about it.”

“Well it’s easy to see why she got hooked on it” Mrs. Engen teased and winked at the keeper who blushed. “They’re all beautiful. You just have a wonderful little family.”

//

The weekend after the eclipse trip was another one of those busy trifecta weekends that happened every three years or so around the Boston Marathon. Breakers Opening Home Game, Easter and the Marathon all packed together in one crazy weekend. They got home from Vermont Tuesday afternoon after stopping several places to let the kids out to run around and break up the trip a bit. Thursday evening was the Breakers Meet and Greet event which Ashlyn attended in her ambassador role. It always made her feel good that so many of the fans still wanted to see her and greet her and interact with her. She felt a little guilty and she would only ever admit it to Ali, but she loved the attention from that special group of fans who had embraced her from her very first appearance in a Breakers uniform. She was great about it too though. When she would talk to a fan who was dying to meet or see her, Ashlyn would always talk about the current team and a couple of current players to try and make sure her fans would always stay Breakers fans. And that’s exactly why Bob Kraft had wanted her for the ambassador role. He knew that’s how she would handle it. 

On Friday, Deb and Mike left for their two-week trip through Italy, their international flight leaving from Logan airport in Boston. Saturday was the Breakers home opener and most of the Krieger clan, as well as many of the other members of the four families, attended the afternoon game. Ashlyn and Ali brought all four kids to the game and hung out with friends, family, co-workers and clients in the K-H suite. The Breakers even won the game and looked good doing it. Tanner popped in for the second half after spending the first half with some of his Revolution teammates in their suite. The Revs were having a slow start to their season but looked better than they had in recent years. Tanner was getting subbed in more often than not, especially if they had a lead they were trying to protect. At least he didn’t feel like he was going to be cut any time soon. He fit and he knew that the team and the coaching staff realized it too. 

Sunday was Easter and they all went to Ken and Vicki’s as usual. The big news that Easter, besides the fact that Lily loved Bandit just as much as Josie loved Koty, was that Koty and Brianna were engaged to be married. He had proposed the week before and their big day was going to be in June of next year. Vicki looked really happy and Ali decided to take her cue from that. The Kriegers had all been nervous about Brianna’s hard-drinking family not being accepting of Koty and his choice to live a sober life. They weren’t very accepting but Brianna stood up for her man and defended her boyfriend that Christmas and told her family that unless they could learn to love and accept Koty they would lose her in their lives too. It was going to take some work and some patience but everybody was hopeful for a good outcome. They all liked Brianna and wanted it to work out for the young couple. Koty proposing sure seemed like it was a good sign that they had at least come to some sort of understanding with her family. Ken looked nervous and Ashlyn made a mental note to check in with him when his house wasn’t full of little kids running around on sugar highs. 

And then Monday was the Boston Marathon. This would be the second year in a row that they hadn’t volunteered at the marathon and they both missed it. Ashlyn tried to get Ali to go without her, but you had to sign up months in advance to secure your volunteer status and spot and Ali hadn’t done that. The keeper made her promise to sign up for the marathon in 2025 when it was time. There was no reason they both had to miss it. Ashlyn wouldn’t have her wife miss out on one of her favorite things in the world again.

There were two relatively low-key weeks where nothing too crazy happened. It was just daily life at the big old house. Dodge and Lily continued to add new words to their vocabulary and Josie kept learning how to put more words into sentences, instead of just the two-word beauties she had gotten so good at since her second birthday, and speak like her big brother. She would normally say “Mama car?” as they left the house and both Ali and Ashlyn knew that she was asking if they were going to take the minivan. This cracked Ali up to no end just because the minivan was now and forevermore known in the family as Ashlyn’s car. Now that she was getting closer to three years old, Josie had been learning how the other words started to fit into that question. At the end of that April she asked “Go in Mama car?” instead. It seemed like a small achievement but she was unlocking all of the building blocks to the English language, just as Drew had done before her. Poor Drew had to do it all on his own too. He didn’t have an older sibling to model himself after. 

And Josie, even though Drew didn’t tolerate her much better than he had when she was an infant, loved her big brother more than anything in the world. It broke Ali’s heart when she watched Drew push her aside or ignore her sweet overtures and attempts to join him in whatever he was doing. The brunette tried to remember if Kyle had ever done that to her. She was sure he must have – it’s the most natural thing in the world between siblings. But she didn’t remember it. She hoped, more than almost anything in their kid-filled world, that her children would genuinely like each other as they grew up. She knew it was a tall order but she would give almost anything for it to become so. Ali also knew that her relationship with Kyle was special and that not every sister had that type of close friendship with their brother. Not even Ashlyn and Chris were as close as Ali and Kyle. Ali didn’t need her kids to be as close as she was with her brother – it would be amazing, of course – but she wanted them to like each other just as much as they loved each other.

“Ow! Son of a...” Ashlyn bellowed loudly through the first floor of the house. There was a loud thud that followed as she slammed her hand down on the leather couch in the family room where she was sitting and breastfeeding Lily. “Jesus...” she grimaced.

It was the middle of Friday morning and Ali came hustling into the family room from the kitchen where she had been rinsing out the bottle Dodge had just finished. The brunette decided she wanted to work from home that day. She had had one of her really bad cramp episodes the evening before and just wasn’t feeling great. Ashlyn had taken Drew to school that morning and now they were both home with the three youngest kids.

“What happened?!” her voice was anxious as she briskly entered the room, drying her hands on the dishtowel as she moved towards the couch. “Are you ok?”

Ali could see the look of pain across her wife’s beautiful face as she came around to the front of the couch. She put her hand on Ashlyn’s shoulder and bent over Lily to check on her at the same time.

“I’m fine” the keeper replied shortly. “I shouldn’t have yelled...”

“What happened babe?” Ali sat on the coffee table and faced the blonde, keeping a hand on her knee the whole time.

“She bit me, really hard” her words were terse and the tone of her voice hard as she explained.

“Oh babe, I’m sorry. That kills, doesn’t it?” she leaned forward and kissed Ashlyn on the forehead. “Is she almost finished?”

“Yeah, she’s just playing around now I think...”

“Let me get you some ice and then I’ll take her” Ali said as she moved back to the kitchen, on the other side of the big two-sided fireplace between the two rooms.

“I know you don’t mean to do that” the keeper cooed and smiled at Lily who patted Ashlyn’s chest with her free hand and began to suck on her nipple again. “But it really hurts when you do...”

“Here you go sweetheart” Ali held out one of the teething rings wrapped in a damp paper towel. “Want me to take her and burp her?”

“She’s nursing again now” Ashlyn rolled her eyes and sighed with a smile. “Where’s the boy?”

“He’s still watching his show...”

When the kids woke up from their naps Ali and Ashlyn liked to ease them back to life. They always had a bottle or a snack after a nap and they would almost always sit or snuggle with you quietly while they watched a kid show. It was one of the best half-hours of the day if you were lucky enough to be part of it.

“And JoJo?”

“She’s behind you” Ali pointed to the nook table with a big smile. She loved that Josie was into drawing and being creative and she hoped she never grew out of it. “She loves that big paper you got. I helped her trace Fred while the twins were napping and she’s been coloring him in ever since.”

“That’s awesome” Ashlyn’s eyes lit up. “I can’t wait to look...Ow! Jesus... Fu...”

“Hey!” Ali interrupted before her wife dropped the f-bomb in a room with two little girls who were both capable of talking. “I think she’s done. She’s definitely just messing with you now.”

Ashlyn’s face was red and flushed as she did her best to stay calm. All the breastfeeding books and chatrooms and websites said the same thing – the baby didn’t mean to bite your nipple. They weren’t trying to hurt you but sometimes it happened. That’s why these same resources suggested unlatching the baby when they started playing around with the nipple instead of actually sucking on it. It was a sign that they were done and nothing good was going to happen once they lost focus or were finished eating but didn’t want to let the mom go. The twins were following almost the same teething schedule that Drew had when he was a baby. Both Lily and Dodge had their four top incisors and their two middle, bottom incisors. They were both teething right now and their moms were expecting Dodge’s two bottom, lateral incisors to come in any day now, with Lily’s to follow about a week or two behind. That’s how it had gone up to this point. Those four sharp teeth up top could cause, and had caused, a lot of pain to a breastfeeding mother. Lily seemed to be much more aggressive about it than Drew ever had been with Ali. Ali could almost tell when it was going to happen with him, towards the very end when he was almost finished but then decided he wanted to try for some more. That’s when he typically bit her. And, because she could sort of anticipate it, Ali was usually able to get her finger in between his jaws at the back to stop him from getting a good bite in. She wasn’t always successful and she had endured many painful bites, accidental or not. But Lily’s bites weren’t on any kind of regular schedule. There was no way to anticipate them. It was almost as if she just bit when she felt like it and for who knew what reason.

Ashlyn helped Lily unlatch and let Ali pick her up and put her over her own shoulder to burp her. The brunette sat next to her wife on the couch and watched as she gingerly held the teething ring to her angry, red nipple and winced.

“I’m so sorry Ash” Ali said softly as she patted their baby girl on her back. “That looks really sore.”

“It f..., really kills” the keeper whined. “I can’t even imagine doing this for both of them” she confessed after a quiet moment. “I think it was a blessing in disguise that Dodge wouldn’t take to my nipple, really.”

“You might be right babe” Ali replied as Lily burped. She kissed the baby girl on her cheek and turned her around to sit on her lap.

“Dod” she said and bounced up and down on Ali’s lap. That was all she could say of ‘Dodge’ but it did the trick. Dodge, likewise, couldn’t say ‘Lily’. All he could say was ‘Wee-wee’ which got shortened to ‘Wee’. Both moms were hoping he would conquer his Ls soon so they didn’t have a son calling his sister ‘Wee’ across the playground for very long.

“Ok baby girl” Ali chuckled as she picked her up and carried her into the front living room to play with her twin brother. She put her on the floor inside the gate. “Play nice for a few minutes and I’ll be right in” she promised.

The brunette sat next to her wife on the couch again and gave her a side hug on her non-sore nipple side. She followed that up with a sweet kiss to her cheek.

“You know, only you know when it’s time to stop” Ali started carefully and spoke slowly and quietly. “There’s no right and wrong.”

“I know honey, thank you” the keeper looked at her beautiful brunette and gave her a small smile. “I really wanted to get a full year into her though. It feels like a failure if I can’t make it another three weeks.”

“But that’s exactly what I’m saying babe. Who cares about three weeks? I don’t. She doesn’t. You shouldn’t...”

“But do you think she’s really ready?” Ashlyn held her gaze and studied her face as they talked about weaning the twins from the breast and the bottle. “You breastfed Drew for 13 months...”

“Yes, but that was Drew. This is Lily, and Dodge. And they’re different. I know Dodge is ready. He sucks his bottle down now just to get it done” she chuckled. “Except for his nighttime one, he still loves that one” Ali added wistfully and smiled again.

“You really think so?” Ashlyn grimaced as she found a section of the teething ring that was colder and pressed it against her nipple again.

“I really do” Ali paused, trying not to be too pushy, remembering how traumatic it had been for her when Drew started to wean himself from her breast. “And if she’s just messing with you like this I think that means she’s ready too. And maybe she knows it and that’s why she’s biting you or something. I don’t know” she shrugged and reached for her keeper’s hand, holding it in her lap.

“I like that explanation better than the one I keep coming up with” Ashlyn chuckled and rolled her eyes.

“What, that she’s a vampire?” Ali giggled, remembering what Ashlyn had said the last few times Lily had bitten her.

“Yeah, either that or she’s a devil baby or something awful like that...”

“God, don’t even joke” Ali leaned forward and knocked wood on the coffee table.

“Well you’re not the one she keeps biting all the time!” Ashlyn whisper-yelled as Ali shut her up by bringing their lips together in a soft, slow kiss.

“Are you just kissing me like that because...you know...” Ashlyn glanced down at her exposed nipple and then back up.

“No, you big jerk” Ali shook her head and rolled her eyes with a playful slap to the keeper’s arm. “I want to make sure you’re ok with all of this stuff. It’s a lot and I remember it being really hard for me to deal with.” She paused and kissed her wife again, just as softly and slowly. “I want you to know that whatever you decide is ok with me and that I’m sorry she’s making it so painful for you now.”

“Is this the patented Krieger jealousy I’m detecting...” she teased the brunette quietly, Josie was still coloring away in the nook ten feet behind them and out of earshot. “Are you just trying to keep these all to yourself?”

“Ashlyn, that’s not even funny” Ali sat up straight and frowned at her grinning wife.

“Yes it is, and you know it” the blonde persisted, dimple on display. 

“I’m trying to talk to you about stopping breastfeeding – something you’ll never do again in your life. And you’re making a joke out of it” Ali looked more confused than sad. 

“Aw, I know you are baby” Ashlyn pulled her in for another side hug and kissed her head. “I don’t mean to make light of it. I’ve been thinking about it for a few weeks now...”

“You have?” Ali sat up, surprised, and looked at her keeper.

“Sure. Once she started biting me and it felt like it was on purpose or whatever” she shrugged, unable, still, to explain that part of it. “That’s when I decided I really wanted to get her to one year. But since we’ve talked I’m re-thinking that.”

“Ok, good. That’s all I’m asking. Just think about it. I think we should start weaning Dodge now because he’s definitely ready. But I’ll let you decide what to do with little miss teeth.” The smile was back on Ali’s face. She was relieved to hear that Ashlyn had already been thinking about weaning Lily. “Ok?”

“I think it’ll be better to wean them at the same time...”

“But I don’t want to hold him back because she’s...”

“No, I don’t want to do that either” Ashlyn interrupted right after her wife. “Give me a couple of days, ok?” she looked tenderly at her wife’s face. “I want to think about it when my nipple isn’t screaming in pain before I make my final decision. Ok?”

“Of course babe. Of course” Ali kissed her lips sweetly and cupped her cheek. “We can wait another week. He’ll be fine.”

“Thank you, I appreciate it. And I appreciate you talking to me about this” Ashlyn hugged her.

“Any time honey. Always.”

They stayed in their side hug for another minute before Ashlyn spoke again.

“Maybe you should take a look and make sure there’s no permanent damage” she teased and glanced down at her nipple again with a smirk.

“You are too much” Ali laughed and shook her head as she tried to sit up. Ashlyn wouldn’t let her go though.

“Maybe just a little kiss to make it feel better...”

“The last thing your nipple needs right now is any more lips on it” the brunette laughed again and repeated her effort to escape the hug.

“You think you know everything huh?” the keeper teased some more, her dimple on display and her face one big grin. “Just because you’ve already done this before and really do know everything...”

The silly teasing was interrupted by a loud cry from the front living room that snapped them both to attention.

“Saved by the bell” Ali quipped as she stood up and moved quickly towards the sound of the cry. Ashlyn just managed to playfully swat her butt before she moved out of reach. “Why don’t you go check on the next Mary Cassatt back there since your injury seems so much better” the brunette sassed back over her shoulder as she went.

“I think she’s more of a Georgia O’Keeffe myself, actually” the keeper shot back as she stood up and turned to go check out Josie’s big project. “And you never kissed it so it’s not better!”


	7. Soccer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is Sunday's chapter in case my plans keep me from posting tomorrow night.

“Are you ready babe?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be” the keeper exhaled loudly and swallowed hard, closing her eyes for a second to compose herself. “Thanks for doing this with me.

“Always.”

The roar of the crowd was as deafening as it always was whenever Ali Krieger had been lucky enough to stand next to her wife in the beautiful soccer stadium in Boston. She would never get used to the waves of sound and energy that rolled down onto the pitch and hit them full force in the chest. It took her breath away, again, that day in May. Drew was adorable, as usual, as he couldn’t decide who to stand in front of, Whitney or Tobin. He originally chose Tobin because he didn’t get to see her very often, but then switched over to Whitney when he realized the rest of his family was standing closer to the lawyer than the captain of the Portland Thorns. Both teams were out for the pre-game line-ups, coin toss and national anthem. But in a change to the way they normally handled these things, which was usually done at halftime, the Breakers were going to have Ashlyn Harris’ Pillars of Excellence Induction Ceremony before the game started. The other five members of the club stood shoulder to shoulder with their special, Breakers blue sashes across their chests: Angela Hucles, Kristine Lilly, Leslie Osborne and Whitney Engen. Even Maren Meinert had travelled in from Germany for the occasion which was definitely rare. She had been the very first member of the elite group. 

The Breakers had advertised it for weeks so all the fans knew the plan. What they didn’t know was that the Portland Thorns had asked them to do it before the game so they could stand on the field for it and be there for the ceremony too. It was Tobin Heath’s final season, she had announced her retirement plans at the beginning of the season so everybody could come out and see her play one last time. She would be turning 36 years old at the end of May and it was time. She had been able to play a few years longer than most of the field players usually manage to do. She chalked it up mostly to luck and her style of play which wasn’t particularly heavy on the contact aspects of the game. She wasn’t like an Alex Morgan or Abby Wambach or Carli Lloyd who was constantly being muscled or flat out mauled by the defense as she tried to receive the ball, turn the defender or defenders, and then score a goal. 

When the Breakers had been setting up the big celebration, they asked Ashlyn for input on which game she wanted it to be held during, and what her banner would look like. The first question was easy. Those epic battles between the Breakers and the Thorns had been some of the best the league had ever seen. Many believed that the strength and grit and talent displayed by both teams for those several years was what really helped the league solidify its footing. The USWNT winning the 2015 World Cup was probably the most important thing to happen to the NWSL in the early, formative years. But the Thorns/Breakers battles were definitely the second most important. Most of the players would tell you the same thing. There weren’t many players left on either team from those games, but the handful that had participated looked on with great emotion and pride as Whitney Engen did the honors and talked everybody through all of Ashlyn’s accomplishments and stats and records and awards and achievements. She had practiced her speech for weeks, wanting to do her best friend justice, and it had paid off. With Drew standing right in front of her, and her hand comfortably holding onto his shoulder so he didn’t just take off again, Whitney talked about the best person she ever played soccer with. They all watched the jumbotron as it showed clips of Ashlyn’s amazing career. The Breakers media team really wanted to show more than just her jaw-dropping saves so there were lots of great, intense images and clips of her encouraging the team and urging them on and inspiring them.

In a surprise to everyone, Whitney handed the microphone to Tobin when she was done with the walk down memory lane. Ashlyn, holding Dodge in her arms, looked questioningly at her wife, who was holding Lily, but Ali just shrugged. She was just as much in the dark as everybody else. The two women stood side by side with a child on their outside hip and Josie standing right in front of them, taking turns leaning back against Ali’s leg and then Ashlyn’s leg. Tammye and Carol and Mike and Lydia had flown up for the ceremony and Tammye and Mike stood right behind Ashlyn and Ali. Drew was content standing in front of Whitney, especially now that Tobin was standing a lot closer. Ali had started with her arm around Ashlyn’s waist but as the ceremony had gone on and Lily had gotten heavier, each twin weighed about 23 pounds give or take, she had to hold onto her daughter with both hands.

“Hi. Hi everybody” Tobin smiled nervously at the huge crowd and waved. “Whitney hooked me up so I could just say a couple of things” she turned and nodded at the lawyer. “Thanks Whit.”

Whitney returned the nod and smiled broadly, knowing what a big deal it was for her shy friend to do this.

“I uh, I just wanted to, first of all, thank the city of Boston for being smart enough and awesome enough to appreciate Ashlyn Harris for the great player and person that she is” she paused while the crowd cheered wildly. “No, I really mean it” she powered through the end of the cheers to make sure she got her point across. “You embraced her and supported her and loved her and that doesn’t always happen. We can feel that from you, you know” she smiled shyly at the crowd. “And it’s hard to describe, but I’m telling you, we feel it and it makes a difference. I’m sure she’ll tell you herself just how much when she gets up here to talk.” 

There were more cheers and Ashlyn dropped her arm down between she and her wife and was relieved when the brunette reached down and took her hand.

“Ashlyn is one of my best friends and I’ve known her a long time and I’m very very grateful to be able to be here today for this ceremony. I think we all know she had to hang em up too soon and it was really hard to take her retirement, at least for me anyway. How about you?” she posed the question to the crowd and made them scream and cheer even louder than before. “I thought so” she laughed and smiled back at the mass of Ashlyn Harris fans. “Ash, I just want to tell you that I love you” she said a little quieter, turning to face the blonde keeper she had been friends with for what would be 20 years that August. “You were the best teammate when I was lucky enough to be on the same team. And you were the very best opponent I’ve ever faced, here or in London or in Canada or in Rio or in France” she listed off the major tournament locations for the past few Olympics and WWCs in what most understood to be a dig at the USWNT for never calling her up to the senior level. “What I don’t think you get enough credit for is everything you’ve done for this league, for the NWSL. I know what this next statement means and I’m saying it because I firmly believe it. You changed this league and made it better. You taught dozens of young women how to be a professional athlete, I don’t know, maybe hundreds even. You taught coaches that this league and these players were for real and deserved coaches who were all in. You did the same with the officials, demanding that they lift their game up as we improved ours. Nobody really gave this league much of a shot after the first two didn’t work out. Everybody assumed it would last two or three seasons and then just disappear like the others. It took outstanding players like you Ash, to show the owners and the fans and the media that we were different and that we weren’t just going to go away. People called this the best women’s soccer league in the world but you are one of the people who made that statement true. You played hard every second of every game. You did anything in your power to help your teammates with whatever they needed, whether it was on the pitch or off. You were the ultimate professional, always going out of your way to spend time, extra time usually, with the fans whenever you could.” 

The crowd erupted again and stood up for another ovation that lasted several more minutes. Ashlyn and Ali had to put the twins down because they were so heavy. The brunette patted her wife’s lower back reassuringly to let her know that she would take care of them and not to worry about them. Before she even had to deal with the issue, Kristie Mewis and Rose Lavelle walked over and picked them both up, carrying them back to the Breakers line-up where nine other players helped keep them entertained and happy for the rest of the ceremony. Both Ali and Ashlyn mouthed ‘thank you’ to them and then turned back around to face a beaming Tobin and an adoring crowd. Ali put her arm back around her wife’s waist and her other hand on Josie’s shoulder while Ashlyn waved to the crowd again.

“Ok, ok” Tobin chuckled. “I should have realized that would get you all riled up again” she grinned sheepishly. “I’m almost finished, I promise” she paused for just another minute before continuing, hoping the crowd would quiet down once they realized they couldn’t hear the midfielder anymore. “It was an absolute honor, and one of the highlights of my entire playing career, facing you and your Breakers teams in those incredible Championship battles. I know I can speak for our whole team when I tell you that we’ll never forget them or you. So, yeah, thanks Ash, for everything. You’ve given so much to so many of us over the years and I just wanted to make sure everybody realized how truly special you are. I love you and I’m so lucky to call you my friend.”

Tobin handed the microphone back to Whitney and walked the ten feet to hug Ashlyn. The two friends both had tears in their eyes, as did Whitney and Ali and almost everybody else who knew either Tobin or Ashlyn, and they hugged for a long minute. Finally, Ashlyn bent back and lifted the midfielder up off the ground in her typical greeting. Everybody smiled and Tobin gave Ali and Josie a quick hug before hustling back to her captain’s place at the beginning of the line-up. The crowd laughed and she turned around to see Drew following her. She gave him a big hug and stood him in front of her, patting his chest with her hands and grinning from ear to ear. Whitney held out the microphone in front of her and quirked her eyebrow at the keeper. Ashlyn smiled at her, kissed Ali’s cheek and walked over and took the microphone. She gave Whitney a big hug before turning around and clearing her voice away from the mic.

“Wow, how am I supposed to follow that up Tobes?” she teased her friend and laughed. “You always have to make my job a little harder than everybody else, don’t you?” she joked, hoping the rest of the crowd would understand what she meant. “Seriously though, thank you Tobin and the entire Portland Thorns organization for being a part of my special day. I really appreciate it” she nodded at all of the Thorns and their bench and coaching staff. When she heard a few boos starting to rain down on them she spoke up again. “Hey now, nobody should be booing these guys right now. Do you know why we changed the ceremony to pre-game instead of halftime?” she cocked her head as if she could hear some of the replies coming down from the stands. “Yeah, I didn’t think so” she chuckled. “Listen, we changed it because this organization asked us to, because they wanted to be a part of it and that really means a lot to me. So please don’t boo them. Save it for when the game starts” she chuckled. “Then you can boo them all you want” she laughed as did almost everybody on the field and in the crowd. The keeper got serious after that and thanked Robert Kraft, Jonathan Kraft and the entire Breakers organization. She thanked the coaching staff and the training staff and made a joke that Dani, the long-time head trainer for the Breakers, had seen more of her body over the years than her own wife. Everybody cracked up and Ali blushed as she smiled adoringly at the love of her life. The keeper thanked the other Pillars of Excellence for making the trip and helping make her day so special. She introduced each of them to the crowd just in case anybody forgot who any of them were. Ashlyn got choked up as she thanked her teammates, naming a couple and telling quick, funny bits about them that left the players in tears with laughter as they listened. She spent a few minutes talking about what a thrill and a gift it had been to play alongside her best friend for six years here in Boston.

“The best six years of my life” she said as her voice broke a little bit.

She took a few minutes and thanked UNC and her college coaching staff for saving her life, her real life and not just her soccer life. She used that to segue into talking about the Mental Health Initiative.

“May is ‘Mental Health Awareness Month’ here in the USA and I’d like to challenge each and every one of you to ask for help if you need it” the crowd cheered and she had to wait for a few seconds before she could be heard again, “and if you don’t need help, I challenge you to find someone who does and be there for them in some way. We need to make it ok to talk about mental health, for kids and young adults and grown-ups and the elderly. Everybody needs help every once in a while and there should be no shame in asking for it.”

Ashlyn spent a few minutes thanking her family, mentioning all four of the ‘parents’ who had made the trip up from Florida for her big day. She thanked her brother and his family for all of their support and told the crowd how much she still missed her Gram.

“This one’s a tough one” she exhaled and swallowed, taking a quick minute to try and get her emotions in check. “I have to try and thank my wife and it’s just impossible to do because the words don’t exist to tell you all what she means to me.” The crowd awwwed and clapped at the sweet sentiment, easily able to see how moved the keeper was by the moment. “Honey” she said, her voice shaking just the tiniest bit, as she turned to look at Ali. “I love you. If our kids turn out to be half the wonderful human being you are, then I’ll consider my life an incredible success. Thank you – for...everything.”

The crowd started to cheer again but she stuck her arm up and kept talking, trying to hold them off so she could finish.

“Hold on, hold on, I’ve got one more really important thank you to send out...” she waited a minute for the crowd to quiet again. “Boston. I’m a Florida girl and I didn’t even know how to drive in the snow when I moved up here 9 years ago” she chuckled and everybody laughed with her. “But you took me in and you welcomed me and you accepted me and you supported me and you loved me. I’m proud to call myself a New Englander now, even if I don’t talk like one” she winked and laughed. “I’m raising my family here. This is my home. Thank you all! I love you Boston!”

The crowd went nuts again, giving her the longest ovation of the protracted pre-game ceremony. She gave the microphone back to Whitney who handed it over to Bob Kraft who had quietly come onto the pitch during the huge ovation. Ashlyn stood there with both arms raised over her head, clapping and acknowledging the crowd. She turned around and did the same thing to all four sides of the stadium before Bob Kraft started to speak.

“Ashlyn, I’m honored to be here with you on this very special day. The producers have threatened me with bodily harm if I say more than three words” he chuckled. “So I’ll only say this. I’ve been telling people, anybody who’ll listen pretty much, how special I think you are and in the two years since your retirement you’ve only made it easier to keep telling that story. I’m so glad to know you and to work with you and I’m thrilled that you’ll be around Boston for years to come.” He walked up to the blonde and put his arm around her waist. “The other thing I want to say, that she wouldn’t say because that’s just the way she is” he chuckled and she closed her eyes, knowing what he was going to say next. “If any young girl wants to learn how to be great at soccer from some of the very best soccer players in the world, you need to go to Ashlyn and Whitney’s soccer camp next summer. When is it starting Ash?” he looked up and she leaned down and answered in his ear. “That’s right. It’s starting next summer, in June. So tell your moms and dads to check it out online. For now you can get some details on Ashlyn’s website and we’ll put a link on our Breakers and Revs sites as well so you can find it easier. Ok?”

There was another big round of applause and then the owner gave the signal to unveil the new banner. Mr. Kraft motioned for Ashlyn’s family to come and join them and they all did, Kristie and Rose returning the twins to Mike and Ali so they could all stand around the keeper for the big photo op. It seemed silly, but the toughest decision for Ashlyn about the whole ceremony had been how to have her hair look on the banner. Whitney teased her mercilessly about it and offered absolutely no help whatsoever in the decision. Ali deferred as well, telling her that, obviously, she loved it both ways. Ashlyn was torn between wanting to honor the time she played for the Breakers and using her long hair in its thick braid versus being more true to her present self and using her short fade haircut instead. 

“I think I’m going to use the braid” she announced back in March as the deadline for her decision approached. “I played almost my whole career with it and won all my championships with it. It just seems right.”

“That sounds like a really good decision honey” Ali wrapped her arms around her wife’s stomach from behind and smiled at her in the big vanity mirror as they got ready for bed. “You’ve thought it through and I’m proud of you. I know this wasn’t easy for you.”

The ceremony ended when Bob Kraft presented her with the commemorative plaque and then unfurled her Pillar of Excellence that would fly up in the rafters of the stadium from that moment forward, right alongside Meinert’s #6, Hucles’ #16, Lilly’s #13, Osborne’s #12, and Whitney’s #4. The banner showed an image of each of the players in an action shot, their jersey number clear as day, with their first name at the top and their last name at the bottom of the banner. Ashlyn’s image was iconic to any Breakers fan during her seven seasons in Boston. There wasn’t room on the banner to capture her in one of her signature leaping saves so they had decided to show what happened right after one of those. Ashlyn’s image captured her perfectly, long thick braid and all. She was charging forward, one arm up with a gloved hand pointing directions for the kick she was about to deliver while her other arm cradled the ball tightly to her chest. Her mouth was open, caught in mid-yell and anybody who had ever played with her could practically hear her voice right at that moment. There was fire and determination and passion in her eyes as they scanned the pitch, zeroing in on her target. It was quintessential Ashlyn Harris and she loved the way the banner had turned out. 

Everything after that was a blur that involved getting all four kids back up to the suite where Deb, Mike, Ken, Vicki and the rest of the four families were waiting for them. There was a pretty good soccer game that got played and the Breakers managed to win for their old keeper, although they sure made it interesting right down to the very end. All of the grandparents took the grandkids for the evening and night so Ashlyn and Ali could go out and enjoy the night with the team and their friends. In one of the surest signs yet that they were all getting older, nobody got really drunk that night as they partied and celebrated. Tobin was coming up to the big old house the next day to do some early surfing, or boogie-boarding at least, and then they were going to have another meeting about the Academy while so many Tarheels were still in town. Heather O’Reilly was there too because she called the game for Lifetime TV. Yael Averbuch was coming up for the day after visiting her family in New Jersey. And Cat Whitehill brought her three kids – ages 8, 5 and 2, back with her the next day so they could play on the beach while the grown-ups had their meeting. 

It was still much too cold for a beach day, really. There was no swimming involved at all. But it was a beautiful, sunny, warmer than usual May day so hanging out on the sand and making sand castles was definitely on the docket. Good Harbor beach was awesome for little kids because of the run-off area over to the side of the official beach. The small footbridge that you had to walk across to get from the street to the beach went over this run-off area. Depending on the timing of the tide, this side area went from ankle deep to thigh deep and it acted like a lazy little river. Toddlers were always splashing around in it or looking for shells in it or sitting down in it with huge grins on their faces. Because it was so shallow the water warmed up with the sun so it wasn’t anywhere near as cold as the ocean that created it. That Sunday afternoon the kids played down at the beach, in those shallow, warm tributaries, while the think tank behind the Academy met up at the house. This was the meeting where they brought in local coaches whom they knew and trusted to help them finetune the program and, hopefully, select a location once and for all. 

Ashlyn and Whitney had felt a little foolish when they were trying to come up with a plan that would bring stability and continuity to the camp all summer long – it was going to be an eight-week long camp from mid-June to mid-August. Each session, or week, of camp could be attended independently or a camper could sign up for multiple sessions of camp. They wanted to hire some coaches who could and would work for the entire summer as the backbone of the program. Cat Whitehill, who was the Wellesley HS coach, was one person but they needed more so they could rotate through and actually give each other a week off here and there throughout the entire 8-week program.

“Ummm, I don’t want to butt in or anything” Ali spoke carefully back in February as she lifted Dodge out of her wife’s arms and started to put his tiny little snowsuit on him in the front living room. “But you guys know three of the best high school coaches in the world and I haven’t heard you mention any of them once” she quirked her eyebrow at Ashlyn and Whitney as she continued working on the squirming 9-month old. “Meg, don’t let her start undressing herself or we’ll never get outside” she coached, watching Josie start to take her winter hat off of her head. “Why don’t you go out with Drew and Josie and I’ll be right there with the two munchkins” she suggested and smiled as Meg, one month away from turning 12 years old, guided the excited toddlers out the mudroom door. They were all eager to join the dogs who were already in the backyard.

“What are you talking about Al?” Whitney frowned.

“Are you kidding me Whit? I expected her to forget about them because of her ‘I don’t want anyone to feel obligated’ disease, but I can’t believe you haven’t thought of this yourself” Ali teased with a twinkle in her eye. It wasn’t that often that anyone thought of an idea before Whitney did.

Ashlyn and Whitney looked at each other from their places on the couch and shrugged.

“Wow, you guys” the brunette chuckled and shook her head as she stood Dodge up, making sure his little boots were securely fastened to his feet before putting his hat and mittens on. “Maybe you’re too close to it or something. I don’t know...”

“Just tell us hon” Ashlyn entreated as she put Lily’s hat back on her head for the third time, doing her best to keep the little girl suited up as she waited for her mommy and twin to get ready. “Please.”

“Coach Dwyer from Andover HS with 16 years of experience, Coach Cross who’s been the very successful head coach at Buckingham, Brown & Nichols for 8 years or so, and Ken Krieger...”

“Jesus fucking Christ” the keeper muttered under her breath, astonished at their massive oversight. 

Ali cocked her head and gave her wife a hard look when she heard the curse words pass her lips but kept right on talking.

“...head coach for several high school programs on the North Shore for over 35 years, after his brief professional soccer career ended.” Ali stood up and quickly finished getting herself dressed for the 30 degree day. Then she reached her gloved hand out for Lily’s mittened one, took Dodge’s little hand with her other and turned to go out the mudroom door. “Wake up, would ya?” she teased over her shoulder as she and the twins went outside to join the fun in the snow.

It had taken a few stern conversations with Ashlyn, from both Ali and Whitney, about her problem asking her friends to join her adventures. But they had finally convinced her that it wasn’t fair not to ask them. What if Niki really wanted to come on board and be a coach in this program? The keeper never saw the benefits to her friends that might come from joining her cause. It was a real blindspot for the blonde. Ali and Whitney had talked her into at least asking Sydney, Niki and Ken if they would be interested. If any of them said yes, then they would go from there. Of course, all three of them were very interested. Ken’s schedule was busier because he did so much scouting for the USMNT youth program, but he was definitely interested in helping in any way that he could. Sydney and Niki had signed up for the full deal, all 8 weeks. Boom. Ashlyn, as usual, had been dumbfounded by the willingness her friends showed to get involved in her ventures.

So that day in May the three permanent coaches, Cat Whitehill, Sydney Dwyer and Niki Cross, joined the rest of the Academy planning group. Ken Krieger attended as well, offering his vast knowledge of the structure, organization and execution of the different training regimens and drills that had been most successful in camp sessions like theirs. It was a real meeting of the minds and by the time the chilly beachgoers had come back up to the big old house later that afternoon, they had ironed out all of the details for the eight different sessions. They knew that the first three sessions were going to be for girls in grades 4-9. The fourth session was going to be an “invitational” week for advanced girls in grades 6-11 only. Then two more sessions of the standard training for grades 4-9 to finish out the month of July. The last two sessions were different. Session #7 was for Varsity level girls in grades 9-12 only. Session #8 was a combination of a Varsity team program and a college pre-season level program for the older and more talented players. These last two weeks were team-based. They wanted a local college or high school to send their team to the Academy for a week of their pre-season prep. Each session, or week, started on Sunday morning and ended on Thursday afternoon. If a camper wanted to do consecutive sessions they could stay over the weekend and participate in what they called a ‘bridge’ session. It was a reduced rate and it was basically a babysitting session where they played a lot of soccer, worked on some individual areas that were specific to each camper, and had some more relaxed fun. This was also the time the new visiting coaches arrived and the ones that had already participated departed. 

They also worked out the other staffing needs, for trainers and nurses and the other requirements they would need to meet to function as an actual camp. The campers needed cabins to sleep in, showers, food to eat as well as a place in which to eat it, and a medical cabin where they could go for all of their pre and post-pubescent needs. Julie Donaldson, Ashlyn’s next door neighbor had happily agreed to participate. She couldn’t guarantee the whole 8-week program, but she would do the best she could. She had also turned out to be a great resource for finding other local nurses who were interested in participating too. A big part of the draw for this camp for the coaches and other volunteers, was that they could bring their own kids if they wanted to. There would be some sort of daycare situation set up to accommodate any little ones who came to camp with their moms. The planning group outlined how Sydney, Niki, Cat and Ken would all be mining their own players to find volunteer counselors to do a lot of the actual babysitting portion of the camps. These would be older girls for the campers to emulate and get to know throughout their time at the Academy. These volunteer counselors would receive official training as camp counselors so they could learn to deal with anything that might come up with any of the campers – homesickness, boy trouble, girl trouble, bullying, all the usual teenage things. All of the coaches were confident they could find the right girls for the job and also knew that that kind of volunteer position would look great on college applications. They expected to have mostly juniors filling those roles, just for that reason, but maybe some late applying seniors too.

The only real loose end was finding the physical location for the camp. And that was proving to be a real headache. Cat had a couple of leads through some associates she had made while living in New England and playing with the Breakers before Ashlyn and Whitney joined the team. But neither of them had panned out yet. They weren’t officially panicking about not having a location yet...but they were pretty close. If any work had to be done to it to get it ready for their camp then they wouldn’t have a lot of time to complete it before they opened the doors the third week of June. That would be the primary focus for the next few months as the June 2025 date crept even closer.

“Wow” Tobin said, her eyes wide and a loopy grin across her face. “You guys have been busy.”

“I’ll say” Yael added.

“No kidding” Heather chimed in. “This is really really impressive. Way to go.”

Whitney frowned and couldn’t hide the surprised look on her face.

“What? Did you think we were just up here playing around or something?” the lawyer asked defensively.

“Yeah Whit” Ashlyn said slowly as she watched Tobin and Heather’s faces blush, “they totally did.”

Cat, Ashlyn and Whitney all exchanged a pointed look.

“Mia’s in” Cat offered nonchalantly, letting the visitors know the biggest name visiting coaches who had signed up so far. “And so is Lil. They’re both stoked.”

“Ummm, Mia as in Hamm and Lil as in Kristine Lilly?” Sydney clarified with her jaw on the floor.

“Yep” Whitney grinned. “And you know those ‘99ers” she chuckled, “they like to get together.”

“Leslie Osborne and Angela Hucles are in too” Ashlyn added, mentioning her fellow Pillars of Excellence. “Maren said she would love to but, you know, the whole living in Germany thing makes that really hard.”

“We’ve got a ton of interest from Tarheels all over the NWSL” Cat continued. “We’ll have to wait until the schedule comes out for next season so we can schedule during your off weeks and things like that” she explained, looking at Tobin who was the only active player in their meeting.

“Well, don’t look at me” she laughed. “I’m retiring, remember?”

“Shit, that’s right!” Whitney’s eyes got big and she sat forward.

“And yes, sign me up, I’ve told you this before” Tobin rolled her eyes. “I don’t know why nobody ever believes me?” she shrugged her shoulders and chuckled.

“We just know you’re busy and you’ve got your own stuff going on, that’s all” Cat smiled back at her. “But that’s great to hear Tobes. Thank you.”

Both Heather and Yael repeated their interest from the previous meeting they had attended, and offered to coach multiple weeks of the camp. Yael even offered to let them use her own training app program, Techne Futbol, for free. They would customize the program for each session so the campers could just download the special program for their session. If they loved it so much they had to keep using it then they could start paying for it after their session was done and Yael would give them a discounted rate. She had started it back in 2016 and it had become more and more successful over the years. It was her full-time job since retiring last year. The Acadamey was going to do the same sort of thing with Sweat Cosmetics, co-founded by Leslie Osborne. Duktig Brand, founded by Tiffany Weimer was going to hook them up with their customized soccer journals too. The former Breaker was going to volunteer as a visiting coach as well. And Sporting Chic was going to be an active participant too, with all three founders, Kristie and Sammy Mewis and Stephanie McCaffrey, working as visiting coaches. Whatever cross-promotional work the Academy could do to help their fellow women’s soccer player/entrepreneurs out they were more than happy to do.

They spent another half hour answering questions from each other and getting more excited every minute. For the newcomers and the visitors, everybody but Ashlyn, Whitney and Cat, they could see that this thing was absolutely going to happen. There were no more lingering doubts about it. The Academy would open thirteen months from now and they were all excited about it.

“So, are we like, gonna give it a real name or anything?” Tobin asked a little shyly. “I mean, ‘The Academy’ sounds good and all, but” she shrugged again and left her sentence unfinished.

“You’re right and we’ve been working on that too” Whitney explained as she sucked in a breath. “Ash and I...we just...well, we didn’t want to exclude anybody and the name we came up with...it might not...”

“Spit it out woman!” Heather urged with a laugh. 

“The Stacy Everett Lewis Academy” Ashlyn’s voice was clear, but quiet.

Tobin, Whitney and Ashlyn shared a powerful look and then moved to see what Heather, Yael and Cat thought about it. All six women had broad, but thoughtful smiles on their faces.

“Um, who’s Stacy Everett Lewis?” Niki bravely asked, her voice respectful because it was easy to see that the woman clearly meant a lot to the Tarheels.

They all giggled at Niki’s innocent question and Sydney and Ken just shrugged their shoulders when Niki looked to them for help.

“It’s not a who” Heather started to explain, her grin growing the more she thought about how perfect the name was. “It’s a place. Olde Campus Lower Quad dorms to be specific. These three” she motioned to Whitney, Ashlyn and Tobin, “got assigned to those dorms their freshman year and never looked back.”

“Northern Campus eh?” Cat smiled as she thought back to her time at UNC Chapel Hill. “I was in Hinton-James on the Southern Campus, suite style.”

“Wow, way down there?” Heather’s eyebrows went up. “That was a haul to get to practice. The suite set up was cool though. Four singles?”

“Yep, it was awesome. And I kind of liked getting away from Fetzer at the end of the day.”

“Not me” Heather grinned. “I lived in Carmichael, suite style, right in Mid-Campus, and my bedroom window looked over Fetzer Field and I loved it.”

“Me too, except I was in Teague” Yael agreed. “Couldn’t get me close enough to the pitch” she laughed.

“We spent a ton of time over in Carmichael and Teague and Parker” Ashlyn smiled at HAO and Yael, listing off the other dorms that were right next to the soccer pitch. “Many memories there for sure. Everybody on the team who lived there was always so cool about letting us crash after practice if we wanted to...”

“Or needed to” Whitney chuckled.

“Oh man, do you remember the time we had to carry Kling to your room?” Tobin asked Heather, slapping her knee and leaning forward as she laughed out loud. “I thought Anson broke her for sure that day. That was a brutal practice” she shook her head, still smiling.

“So you’re naming the Academy after your freshman dorms?” Sydney clarified again, a confused look on her face.

“Yeah” Ashlyn looked a little sheepishly at the coach, realizing that only half of the group was enjoying the trip down memory lane. “They tried to put the athletes into dorms down in Mid-campus or Southern Campus near most of the athletic fields. Makes sense” she shrugged and nodded. “And then you could always move around after your first semester if you really wanted to. But for some reason that year we got put up in Northern Campus, up by the arboretum and the planetarium...”

“And the President of the University’s house” Tobin wagged her eyebrows and made everybody laugh again.

“These were the old dorms from when the University was first started” the keeper continued. “There were no suites or elevators or any of that crap. We were all a little bummed out when we realized there were about ten of us from the soccer team that got stuck up there and some of them did move after the first semester. But we stayed” she nodded at Whitney and Tobin. “It just felt so cool up there, it was quieter and prettier” she shrugged, looking for a more descriptive word but settling. “And there were these rec courts right across the street so we could skate or shoot hoops or do whatever we wanted.”

“We used to meet in the quad, the grassy area in the middle of the four dorms, and kick the ball around” Whitney chimed in. “That’s where we really became friends. I mean, it would have happened eventually anyway on the team...”

“Once we made the team” Tobin interjected. “Which was not easy.”

“Right” Whitney nodded. “But hanging out up there or running through the arboretum or even just studying together in one of our rooms... that’s where we realized we clicked” she smiled warmly at Tobin and Ashlyn.

“And, more importantly” Ashlyn said, only half-teasing, “that’s where we first started dreaming about the Academy.”

“It’s just an idea” Whitney said quickly, getting back to the business at hand of naming their fledgling dream. “So if you hate it, it’s ok to say so. We won’t be mad.”

“Speak for yourself” Ashlyn sat up and looked at the faces around the planning group. “It’s an awesome name and I’ll be pissed if we don’t use it.”

“I like how it’s a girl’s name” Niki offered. “I don’t know if you did that on purpose or not...”

“Nope” Ashlyn giggled. “But we noticed it afterwards too. We just wanted the three names to sound good together, that’s all. But we thought it was like a sign or something when we realized it could be interpreted as a girl’s name.”

“I love it” Tobin grinned. “And I love that my dorm name comes first – suckers!” she teased Ashlyn and Whitney.

“Well I like that my dorm name comes last because that’s the one people will remember” Ashlyn challenged, like a child.

“Well I’m not playing this stupid game” Whitney rolled her eyes. “I’m just glad Everett is in the name.”

And that was how the Stacy Everett Lewis Academy got its name, although over the years, it was still mostly called ‘The Academy’. They knew they had a lot of work left to do to get everything really ready for next June, but they were more inspired and energized than ever to get it all completed in time. Their goal was to have a location finalized before the end of August. That was ambitious, considering their previous attempts had all failed or fallen through, but they had to make it happen. Even if it wasn’t the place they ended up using forever and ever, they had to find someplace that would suffice for their inaugural camp. It was do or die time and they were doers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to admit it feels a little like the universe is mocking me by having the nice Portland Thorns scene during Ashlyn's special day be a part of this chapter after today's semi-final game. F-u universe.


	8. Busy Busy May

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut warning right at the start...

Mother’s Day was the following weekend and neither Ali nor Ashlyn wanted to make much of a big deal out of it. They had done really sweet things for each other the first three years that they were moms. They exchanged thoughtful gifts and gave each other nice cards with little poems written in them. They did variations of breakfast in bed which were really a lot more like lunch on the couch with Drew and Josie nearby and in view at all times. 

“Do you remember when we used to do fake mother’s day for the dogs” Ashlyn chuckled as she squeezed her wife from her big spoon position early on Mother’s Day morning. Ali was used to waking up to her alarm at 6am every day so now she naturally woke up then and, on lucky days like Saturday and Sunday, she went back to sleep for another hour, feeling like she had just won the lottery. Ashlyn loved the way the brunette felt against her body as she kissed her shoulder and nuzzled into her neck, warm and soft and sleepy. “You know I love the kids” she prefaced her next statement carefully, “but sometimes I’d like to go back to one of those lazy Sundays so we could celebrate the way we used to.”

“Mmmmmmm” Ali hummed happily as she thought back to spending the entire morning naked and wrapped up with her keeper. The only interruption being the dogs’ bladders and breakfast and their own coffee needs. “God, don’t tease me like that” she whined and backed her ass up into Ashlyn’s crotch while she tilted her head to give the keeper more of her neck to kiss. She snaked her hand behind her wife and slipped it into the back of her sleep shorts, grabbing her bare ass and pulling it tight against her own.

“Damn baby” Ashlyn whimpered at the contact and busily put her lips to work. “Do we have time?”

“If it’s really a day for us then God will make sure we do” Ali turned around quickly so she was facing her wife and crashed their lips together in an urgent, desperate kiss. 

It was 6:20am and the kids usually weren’t up until 7am and Ashlyn usually had to wake them up to get the morning routine on track. Dodge was their early riser and he sometimes woke up at 6:30, squawking animatedly from his crib in the nursery. Because of this, they had moved Lily’s crib into the guest room so she could get the sleep she needed. The move also cut down on some of the chit chat and shenanigans that went on at bedtime. And it had been easy to determine which child would get the room with the fireplace in it. The child that was not Dodge. That’s all they needed was their curious, active, super strong baby boy to start a fire in the fireplace or something. That had been one of the easiest parenting decisions of their lives. 

“Mmmmmmmmm” the keeper moaned into her wife’s eager mouth, morning breath stopping neither of them anymore. That kind of luxury was for new relationships or couples without children. “Fuck Al” she groaned as the brunette kept up her momentum and pushed the keeper onto her back before rolling on top of her, grinding their centers together almost immediately. “Lock the door...mmmmmmmmm...” she said around another hot, hungry kiss.

“Take your clothes off” Ali instructed as she got off the bed and walked quickly to the hallway door to lock it. She took her sleep tank and pajama pants off before locking the door to the backstairs and getting back into bed. “No teasing if we’re gonna do this...” she cocked her head and quirked an eyebrow in warning as she climbed back on top of Ashlyn who just grinned up at her.

“Well then we’d better start with you, my queen” she flipped them over in one strong maneuver that always made Ali a little giddy. “Jesus what I wouldn’t give to take my time with you” she exhaled as she let her eyes rake down the brunette’s beautiful body with the dark pink nipples dotting her perfect, pert breasts. Before she could even finish her first pass with her eyes Ali bucked her hips up.

“Less talking and looking and more touching and fucking please” she managed to say in equal parts sexy and sweet.

“Yes ma’am” Ashlyn replied, jostled from her roaming gaze.

She pressed warm, open-mouthed kisses to the brunette’s stomach as her hands travelled down her sides, over her hips and down her strong thighs as far as she could reach. Ashlyn felt her wife’s hips buck up into her again and chuckled as she moved her lips up to the valley of her breasts and gently licked the soft skin there, loving the way the goosebumps appeared across Ali’s chest in response. The keeper straddled Ali’s right thigh once the brunette spread her legs out wide for her in anticipation of the touching and the fucking. Ashlyn kept her lips moving across her wife’s chest as she worked up both breasts with strong sucks, light nibbles and gentle licks. Ali had both of her hands exploring the blonde’s body, eagerly moving up and down her sides and across her back. She wished her keeper didn’t have her nursing bra on but immediately regretted the thought as soon as it entered her head. She knew Ashlyn’s time breastfeeding Lily was coming to a fast close and remembered how difficult it had been for her to navigate the complex emotions she had felt when Drew stopped breastfeeding.

“Are you with me baby?” Ashlyn purred as she began to run her fingers through Ali’s short hairs and trail them down through her wet folds, teasing her entrance and expecting to be reprimanded for it.

“Yeah babe” Ali groaned at the tantalizing contact, coming out of her nursing bra thoughts instantly. “Fuck yeah, c’mon...I need you Ash.”

The keeper chuckled again and pushed two fingers into her wife’s throbbing pussy without any further delay. She started to pump them in and out slowly, letting Ali get a feel for them before things ramped up.

“How are you this wet already?” she stopped flicking Ali’s left nipple with her tongue and looked at the brunette in wonder. “You’ve only been awake for...”

“I’ve been awake since six babe, trying to get you going” she gave her own, low, throaty chuckle. “Why do you think you woke up?” she smirked.

“Next time don’t waste so much time being subtle” Ashlyn brought their lips together in a passionate kiss as she began to thrust her fingers in earnest. “That’s twenty more minutes I could have been fucking you...”

Ali stopped her wife’s talking with her mouth, closing it around her tongue and sucking hard on it as her keeper moaned into her mouth again. The brunette reached down and grabbed two handfuls of Ashlyn’s naked ass, squeezing and kneading it roughly as she started her climb. 

“Oh shit babe...yessssss...” she moaned as Ashlyn brought her lips back down to the brunette’s breasts.

The blonde increased her thrusting speed and depth, trying to get some contact to Ali’s clit with the palm of her hand at the same time. She also started to grind down onto the brunette’s thigh, sliding back and forth easily in the juices she had already left there. As soon as Ali felt the pressure on her thigh she groaned again and moved her hands to her keeper’s hips. She pushed and pulled her back and forth, getting more and more worked up as she felt how wet Ashlyn was.

“Yes, unnnnhhhhh...” she moaned out as her body began to bounce along with Ashlyn’s pumping. Her left leg was bent up at the knee and her head was back against the pillow with her eyes shut and her mouth half open. “Oh God that’s good” she gasped.

Ashlyn felt the brunette’s walls already starting to grab at her fingers as they started to constrict and tighten. She moved her mouth to Ali’s other breast and started pumping her fingers even faster, knowing her wife was close to her release. 

“Come on gorgeous” the keeper husked out, incredibly turned on by the sounds their bodies were making together. “Jesus you’re fucking amazing...”

“Oh Ash, I’m close...my clit babe...my...unnnnnhhhhh... fuck” Ali arched her back as one of her legs started to tremble.

Ashlyn knew it was time and she slid down Ali’s right leg, letting her left hand take over the work on the beautiful, red, nipples that were standing at stiff peaks now. She kept up her thrusting, fighting off a cramp in her arm, and lapped lightly at her wife’s swollen clit.

“Shit!” Ali shouted in pleasure.

“Shhhhhh” Ashlyn shushed her, never moving her lips and tongue away from her bundle of nerves. 

“Oh my God...”

The keeper sucked hard on Ali’s clit and smirked when she felt both of her wife’s hands at the back of her head, holding it in place while she ground her clit up into Ashlyn’s mouth. The brunette was ready for more and she pressed hard against her keeper’s mouth, fucking it as she quickly climbed to the edge. Ashlyn just let her wife fuck her face while she kept pumping into her pussy and tugging on her nipples. Ali tilted her hips and held Ashlyn’s head even tighter, working on an even better angle as she panted and gasped her excitement.

“Fuck...” she grunted breathlessly.

Ashlyn could barely move her fingers inside Ali’s pussy anymore, it was so damned tight. She changed her motion and curled her fingers upward, stroking the brunette’s g-spot repeatedly and sending her over the edge. Ali’s body exploded as she came hard. She gushed her passion all over her keeper’s face, not letting up the pressure on the back of her head right away either. She shot her left leg out straight as her whole body shook and quaked while the orgasm took it over.

“Oh my fucking God” she groaned out, gasping and moaning into her pillow as she turned her head to the side in an attempt to be quiet.

Ashlyn slowed her fingers but kept them inside the brunette’s tight core. She pressed her head back against Ali’s hands to let her know she needed to breathe and the brunette immediately released her, eyes opening in a panic and searching for her favorite hazel ones.

“Fuck babe, I’m so sorry” she sat up, fighting through a few more twitches so she could check on the blonde. “Are you ok?” Ali tenderly stroked her keeper’s hair with one hand and cupped her cheek with the other.

“I’m fucking great” Ashlyn answered with a lascivious grin and a wink. “That was awesome. Totally fucking hot baby.” She turned her head to the side and pressed a kiss into Ali’s palm before lowering her head down to enjoy one of her favorite meals. “Mmmmmmmmm...”

“Are you sure I didn’t hurt you honey?” the concern in her voice made Ashlyn stop what she was doing and meet those cinnamon eyes she loved so much.

“Not a bit Al” she smiled reassuringly at the love of her life. “I loved it” she grinned. “I was afraid you were going to catch yourself on one of my teeth so I just closed my mouth and let you grind. Did it feel as good as I think it did?”

“You always make me feel incredible” Ali chuckled and caressed Ashlyn’s cheek again. “But yeah, that felt amazing. Thank you so much babe” she tried to pull her wife up for a kiss and failed.

“I’ve still got some clean-up to do” the blonde smirked and licked her lips. “I’ll be up in a few minutes...”

Ali looked anxiously at the clock on the nightstand.

“There’s no time for that. Come on, hurry up” she tried again to pull the keeper up from between her legs.

Ashlyn debated which she would rather enjoy and it was not an easy decision. Any sex with Ali was always at the top of her list of favorite things to do, regardless of how quick they had to be. But she knew they only had about ten minutes, if they were lucky, and the thought of just leisurely enjoying the snack spread out before her was very tempting.

“Please don’t make me feel guilty all day long for not giving you a Mother’s Day morning orgasm” the brunette pleaded. “Get up here...”

“Mama!” they both heard Dodge yell from his crib in the nursery.

Ali flopped back down onto the bed and rubbed her face with both hands. Ashlyn ducked her head back down and took three more licks through her wife’s soaked folds until Ali couldn’t take it anymore, the guilt or the sensations to her still recovering pussy lips. They heard their bedroom doorknob turn and locked eyes wondering if Dodge had somehow managed to climb out of his crib already.

“Mommy, Dodgie’s awake” Drew’s sleepy little voice came from the other side of the locked door. “Can we snuggle with you and Mama?”

Ali and Ashlyn grinned at each other as every sexual thought left their minds instantly.

“How cute is that?” Ashlyn asked her wife in a soft voice as she wiped her passion-covered face on the fitted sheet between Ali’s legs.

“The best” Ali beamed back at her wife as she tugged her sleep tank over her head and reached for her pajama pants. “Wait one second Drew.”

It only took them fifteen more seconds to get dressed and straighten the bed out. Ali sat up against the headboard, under the covers, while Ashlyn unlocked both doors and let Drew into the room. She gave him a big hug before watching him run up and get onto the bed with Ali. It took him two tries to time his jump right so he could climb up onto the high mattress and into Ali’s waiting arms.

“Mama!” Dodge yelled again, just as Ashlyn was about to open his door. She waited until he was finished so he wouldn’t wake up Lily or Josie with his shouts.

The keeper changed his diaper and then carried him back into their bedroom to join the snuggle fest. Dodge’s little face lit up at the prospect of snuggling with both of his moms in their bed. And, to make it even better, his big brother, whom he idolized, was there too. They were finally all snuggled in together with a kids’ show on the tv at the foot of the bed. Drew was tucked into Ali’s arm towards the inside of the bed and Dodge was in the same place with Ashlyn, in a mirrored position. Ali and Ashlyn’s hands were right next to each other forming a protective barrier between the two boys so there would be no kicking or hitting or inadvertent touching of any kind. They clasped hands and squeezed every once in a while, enjoying the simple touch. They knew it would only be a few minutes before one of the girls woke up and eventually all six of them would be snuggled together in their big bed. That was never really as good as it sounded because it was only a matter of time before somebody kicked somebody else or hit somebody else and then the fighting would begin. No matter how sweetly intentioned the touching began, it always ended with fighting and crying. Sometimes there was bloodshed too. That was life with four little kids. In the quiet moments when it was just Dodge and Drew with them, Ali squeezed her wife’s hand and looked over at her.

“I owe you” she mouthed and smiled sweetly once Ashlyn met her gaze.

The keeper grinned and nodded with an adorable little dip of her head. She leaned over towards Ali and waited for the brunette to do the same. They weren’t close enough to kiss but they could speak softly without the boys hearing because they were engrossed in their show.

“Happy Mother’s day baby” Ashlyn said quietly, saying the rest of what she felt with her soulful, hazel eyes.

“You too honey” Ali looked up at her through her lashes and tilted her head. “There’s no-one better than you” she smiled softly.

//

Later that afternoon they celebrated the twins’ first birthday, which was technically the very next day on Monday May 13th, along with Mother’s Day for all of the moms in the group. May was a tricky month with all of the events that the Kriegers had going on every year. Mother’s Day, the twins’ birthday, Drew’s birthday, Kyle’s sober date which they always tried to celebrate because, honestly, it was the only date that mattered when it came to Kyle and they all knew it. Ali took him out for high tea at the Ritz Carlton in Boston this year. They went the day after Ashlyn’s big ceremony while all of the Tarheels were having their big meeting at the big old house. The brunette knew her brother loved the fancy frilly things and high tea seemed right up his alley. They got all dressed up as if they were about to meet the Queen of England and enjoyed the hell out of their afternoon. Ali wanted to spoil him a little bit because she was so thankful to spend the time with him and she knew it was only because he had made the trip. Their celebration was a day early but neither of them cared. It was one of the best afternoons they had ever spent together. 

This year May had been extra challenging because they added in the Pillars of Excellence ceremony, game and celebration the weekend before Mother’s Day. It was a lot to ask or expect family and friends to just keep gathering over and over again to mark these special days. But Ali and Ashlyn didn’t have to ask. Kyle and Nathan came back up for the Mother’s Day/Twins’ birthday party without batting an eye.

“Well, she is our goddaughter” Kyle teased when his sister called him the month before to tell him it was ok if he couldn’t come back up for it. They would forgive him and the twins wouldn’t remember it. “And it is her very first birthday party ever. How in the world are we expected to miss that?” he laughed into the phone. “Don’t you worry little sis, we’ll be there. Wouldn’t miss it.”

Tammye and Carol were in the same situation but they decided to spend the week on vacation instead of flying back and forth both weekends. But, for once, they actually went on vacation instead of just hanging around the big old house. They went back to Provincetown, just the two of them, and stayed for three nights at the end of the week, returning Sunday midday for the big party. They would fly home again and then come back up for Drew’s birthday party on Memorial Day Weekend. Deb and Mike Christopher had returned from Italy the Sunday before Ashlyn’s Pillar of Excellence ceremony and, instead of going back to Miami, they just decided to spend two weeks at their Manchester condo instead. They also flew back to Florida after the Mother’s Day/Twins’ birthday party. Deb would come back up for Drew’s big day two weeks later while Mike stayed in Miami to get caught up on work.

In addition to the family birthdays and sober dates and Mother’s Day that happened every May, two of their besties had birthdays as well. Niki Cross’ birthday was on May 30th and she, like Drew, had grown up not really expecting much in the way of a party because of the holiday weekend she shared her big day with. Sometimes, Memorial Day weekend was early enough where it was the weekend before her birthday, but not very often. Typically, if the Crosses were in town instead of away with family on Memorial Day Weekend, Ali and Ashlyn and the rest of Drew’s birthday party that knew and loved Niki would sing her their own version of happy birthday, and give her birthday cards and greetings after all of the hoopla for Drew was finished and the kids were running off their sugar highs. And Sydney’s 40th birthday was May 7th, three days after Ashlyn’s big ceremony and one day after Kyle’s sober date. Ali, Sydney and a bunch of their friends from high school and college were all turning 40 that year and they had planned, since they had turned 38, to get together for a big, week-long celebration at a rental house on a beach somewhere in New England during the third week of August. The friends that were lucky enough to be able to spend the entire week were the friends that didn’t have kids yet, Carm, Jessie and Liz. The moms in the group - Ali, Sydney, Erica and Molly Cross, who had become one of the gang a couple of years ago and was also turning 40 that year, would all come down mid-way through the week for a four-day, long weekend. 

Still, Ali made sure she went to Sydney’s house on her birthday and brought her yummy lunch and a silly but still thoughtful gift and a birthday card that made her cry. It had only been two months since Maddox was born and the Dwyers were exhausted. Ali hung out all afternoon and played with 2-1/2 year old James and took care of the baby so Sydney could have a little nap. Dom was taking her out to dinner for her birthday and it would be the coach’s first time leaving the new baby. Sandi was picking Cash up from elementary school, somehow he was just finishing up first grade already, and then babysitting for the evening. Sydney had confided that she was nervous that her mom couldn’t handle all three kids by herself. She had listened to Ali voice the same concerns last year when the twins were newborns and they realized they couldn’t leave all four kids with just anybody. It was a lot. Ali’s solution that May 7th was to reassure her bestie that she would stay through dinner and bedtime to help Sandi out. It was the best birthday present she could possibly have given the frazzled mom. Peace of mind.

//

“Can you believe this whole parade is for your birthday buddy?” Ashlyn joked with her 5-year old son as they all watched the Memorial Day parade make its way through the center of Gloucester and continue down by the harbor. 

There were high school marching bands and floats and lots of local businesses and companies walking in the parade to celebrate the solemn holiday. Drew was much too young to explain that the day was for everybody to remember and honor all the service men and women who had died while serving in the military. Instead, his mama decided to tease him about sharing his actual birthday with the holiday this year.

“You’re just going to confuse him babe” Ali leaned over and whispered in her wife’s ear when she was done laughing at the blonde’s remark. “I get it and it’s cute, but what happens next year when there’s no parade on his birthday?” she asked softly and kissed Ashlyn’s cheek.

“Oh, look at him” Ashlyn countered with a grin. “He loves the idea. We’ll figure it out next year. I promise not to scar him for life, ok?” the keeper winked at the brunette who just smiled and laughed along with her. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

Ali couldn’t deny that Drew certainly liked the idea that he had his own parade that day. He beamed as he watched all the colorful floats and groups walk by with big smiles on their faces. She didn’t think she had ever seen him look quite so happy before, except in the dinosaur park at Disney World. Ali loved that part of Ashlyn, that playful, youthful, silly side of her that not everybody got to see. The brunette couldn’t figure out where her wife got it from. It didn’t come from Tammye and she was pretty sure no-one had ever described Mike Harris as silly. But maybe he had been before addiction had broken him down and almost killed him. It was one of the many mysteries of Ashlyn’s childhood that would always perplex her wife. All the keeper wanted to do that day was make her son feel special, and she had accomplished that for sure. 

They spent the next hour watching the end of the parade and then going out for a late brunch so Drew could have his favorite triple stack of pancakes and waffles, with the big thick waffle in the middle layer so all of the sweet strawberry sauce and syrup could collect there as it worked its way down through the top pancake layer. Five grandparents - Deb, Tammye, Carol, Ken and Vicki, as well as Whitney and Ryan had joined them for the parade and brunch which was wonderful. Every pair took a kid so that Ali and Ashlyn could focus on their birthday boy. Deb monitored them all and had a smile on her face the entire time. It was such a luxurious gift for Ashlyn and Ali. To be able to just trust that your Dad and stepmom would be able to take care of Josie well enough so that she ate something, hopefully something not too terrible so that she would be a wreck for the rest of the big day, and that she behaved. And they had that luxury times three that day with Whitney and Ryan being in control of their godson and Tammye and Carol taking charge of Lily. Ashlyn’s heart was full as she looked over the scene, locking eyes with Deb halfway through the meal. The two women smiled at each other, both knowing how lucky they all were.

The rest of the day was sweet and surprisingly tame, considering all the kids involved. Baby Maddox made his big debut and everybody marveled at how beautiful all of the Dwyer boys were as well as how identical they had all looked as babies. It was uncanny. Even Sydney and Dom had a hard time telling one baby from the other without taking cues from the clothes they themselves were wearing in the picture or the way the room was decorated or something like that which could help them distinguish their boys. The Donaldsons all came over, even 16-year old Justin who often had better things to do than attend a little kid’s party. But all of the Donaldsons liked hanging out at the Krieger house. Even with all the kid chaos, it was still a fun place to visit. And Julie and Neil had become friends with Ali and Ashlyn and they all enjoyed each other’s company. Neil was the typical nerdy scientist sometimes but he was an outdoorsy scientist and that made him infinitely more cool and interesting to almost everybody. Julie had one of those infectious, bubbly laughs and her round face always seemed to be smiling. She didn’t care if one of her kids misbehaved in front of company, she was going to call them out on it and correct them anyway. Ali loved her openness and felt at ease with her almost instantly. Ashlyn and Julie had been the last two to sort of bond and nobody really knew why. They were the two who were home the most too, maybe that had something to do with it. But, over time, they found common ground and grew more comfortable with each other too.

“I don’t know” the keeper shrugged as she tried to explain the disconnect to her mother that day in the backyard. Tammye and Julie didn’t know each other very well, their paths just hadn’t crossed very much yet, and Ashlyn was trying to reassure her mom that Julie was exactly as friendly as she seemed to be. It was awkward because Julie and Carol were standing right there participating in the conversation with them. “Something about her made me nervous at first too but she’s great...”

“Thanks Ash” Julie chuckled and looked away, embarrassed.

Carol gave the keeper a curious look while Tammye stuck her elbow in her daughter’s ribs.

“Ow, no, listen, I don’t mean it in a bad way” Ashlyn tried to explain, touching Julie’s forearm to get her to turn back around. “Ugh, you’re great and I don’t know why, but when I was first getting to know you I was really nervous and it took us a while, I think, because I was always weird around you because of it” she laughed, hoping to diffuse the awkward situation.

“Why on earth did I make you nervous?” Julie cocked her head to the side and frowned at the blonde.

“Probably because you’re a really good mom and a nurse and you always seem to have things running smoothly...”

“Ha!” the nurse laughed out loud. “Boy did I have you fooled. I’m not any better at being a mom than you are, I just have more experience, that’s all. When Drew’s 8 or 9 years old you’ll look the same way to some other younger woman with no kids. Trust me.”

“Was that how old Justin was when you all moved in?” Carol asked.

“Gosh, yeah, that’s right” Ashlyn confirmed slowly as she did the math in her head. “Man, and just look at him now” she shook her head and smiled as they all turned to watch him kicking a soccer ball around with Drew and some of his friends. “I can’t believe he’ll be a senior in high school this fall. It’s just not possible.”

“He’s a good boy” Tammye nodded her agreement. “I’ve seen him mowing the lawn and he takes his time and does it right, even when nobody’s paying attention.”

“Except you – spying on him” the keeper chuckled and nudged her mother’s arm.

“No, well, I mean, it’s hard to miss when you’re standing in the family room with all those windows” Tammye was blushing.

“Well if we’re handing out parenting compliments then you should get a whole bunch Tammye” Julie shifted the topic just a bit. “Your daughter is wonderful with the kids, with every kid I’ve ever seen her with, to be honest. They all love her.”

“She likes to say that’s because she’s just a big kid herself” Tammye smiled and gave her daughter a side hug. “And I know that’s partly true, but it can’t be all of it.” She looked up at the side of Ashlyn’s face proudly. “Sometimes I still can’t believe my little girl has grown up into this beautiful, capable woman. And I don’t mean because I didn’t think it was possible” she added quickly. “It’s just that...you know, they’re so little and innocent and helpless when you first get to know them. And then, somehow, this happens” she smiles broadly and moves her hands in front of Ashlyn as if she’s presenting a prize package on a game show.

Everybody laughs and agrees with Tammye’s statement.

“Well, I’m telling you, she’s great. Did she ever tell you about the time Josie woke up in the middle of the night with a really high fever and Ali came over in a panic to get me?” Julie asked animatedly, her round face jumping into action as it got ready to tell the story.

“No” Carol replied eagerly. “What happened?”

Ashlyn groaned and rolled her eyes, knowing exactly the story her next-door neighbor was going to tell.

“By the time Ali and I got over there and upstairs, Ashlyn had already done exactly what I was going to do. They didn’t even need me” she shrugged and pretended to look offended.

“What did she do?” Tammye asked.

“She had just enough luke-warm water in the tub and had Josie already sitting in it, red-faced and crying as she was” Julie explained. “She even had the wet washcloths in her armpits and on the back of her neck, just like you’re supposed to” she nodded approvingly and grinned.

“Ali was shocked” Ashlyn giggled. “If I had a free pair of hands I would have loved a picture of her face. She was looking at me like I had nine heads.”

“How did you know how to do that?” her mother asked her thoughtfully. “It takes years to figure that sort of thing out when you’re a mom...”

“And some moms never do” the nurse added. “Trust me, I know.”

“It was Gram” the keeper replied with a soft smile. “She talked me through it once when Ali got really sick. That’s the only reason I knew what to do and it only came to me after she left to go get you. I still feel terrible we woke you up that night” she shook her head and smiled sheepishly at her neighbor.

“Hey, we all have our special skills” Julie grinned. “It’s thanks to you that Emma’s doing so well with soccer. She’s never made a sports team in her life and the coach already told her he has big plans for her this Fall. She’s even talking about playing in high school the year after that too” she beamed.

“Aw, she’s great. She just needed a little self-confidence, which is hard to come by when you’re 13” Ashlyn smiled back, sharing in Julie’s pride just a little bit.

“Who’s that?” Julie asked as her head snapped around at the sight of the handsome dark-haired man who had just followed Ali out of the kitchen, both of them with a tray full of pizza slices. 

He was about 6 feet tall and looked to be in good shape if the tanned legs sticking out below his light blue cargo shorts were any indication. The toned, but not too muscular, arms they could see after the sleeves of his polo shirt matched the tan of his legs and moved easily below the big pizza tray.

Carol and Tammye rushed over to help the brunette without waiting to hear the answer, but Ali asked them to go in for the bin full of juice boxes instead. Ashlyn gave her wife a look asking if she needed her help but Ali just winked back at her, letting her know she was all set for the moment.

“That’s Sam, his son Ethan is Drew’s best buddy at preschool. His folks own the pizza place down by the Harbor, right on Rogers Street, by the Harbor Loop.”

Julie squinted and tilted her head and Ashlyn could practically see the smoke coming out of her ears her brain was working so hard.

“Not Sam Machado?” she asked in disbelief.

“Yeah, ‘Machado’s Pizzeria’, that’s the name” the keeper nodded, watching he and Ali put the trays down and start handing slices on paper plates to anyone who wanted one. “Why do you look so surprised?”

“I just...” she shook her head, eyes warming after the surprise. “Do you know the story?”

“I don’t know” Ashlyn laughed at how coy Julie was being about it. “I know he and Ethan moved back to Gloucester last summer and that his wife passed away the year before that. That’s the only story I know” she replied as they watched Sam and Ali laugh about something as they stood angled, shoulder to shoulder, almost defensively, against the throng of hungry kids coming for their food. “Is there more to it than that?”

The party had been a success. They enjoyed the #5 shaped birthday cake, definitely the most challenging number so far for Ali to bake, opened way too many presents and finished the evening off with a big game of slip and slide in the back yard. Really, it was just a good excuse to hose all the kids down after cake and ice cream so they were less sticky during the car ride home. It made everybody happy because the kids genuinely loved it, as did the dogs.

“Just look at your beautiful family” Tammye said tearfully from inside the kitchen where she and Ashlyn were cleaning up the mess from the cake and ice cream. The older woman had paused to look out the back window, getting a great view of the backyard and all of the hose play. She had tears in the corners of her eyes and her voice was shaky and full of emotion. “I know you know I don’t mean this in a bad way, because I know you used to feel the same way” she began, eyes still focused on the backyard as Ashlyn dried her hands off and moved to stand next to her mother to share the view. “But I never saw this for you baby girl, never.” She shook her head and put her arm around her daughter’s waist as they stood side by side. “I was so narrow-minded when you were growing up and I...I’m just so sorry Ashlyn.”

The keeper put her arm around her mother’s shoulders and gave her a light squeeze, never taking her eyes off the adorable scene in the backyard either. An overwhelming sense of déjà vu swept over the blonde as she flashed back to the weekend after her wedding. It was the day everybody left and she and Gram had stood in that very spot in the exact same position as she and Tammye did now. Gram told her what a good mother she knew the keeper would be while they stood there and watched Ali, Whitney and Meg play with the dogs in the backyard. Ashlyn had confided in her grandmother that they were hoping to give her a new grandbaby in two years, in 2019. Neither woman knew then that Gram would never meet any of Ashlyn’s children. That day, seven years earlier, had been full of love, hope and optimism for the future. The keeper struggled with her own emotions as she tried to focus back onto her mother.

“You’re right mom” Ashlyn nodded slowly. “I never saw this for myself either. It wasn’t just you. It was the times I guess” she shrugged. “You weren’t great when I came out, but you weren’t horrible. I hope that helps a little bit” she turned her head and looked at the tears streaming down Tammye’s face. “Aw mama, don’t cry” she soothed. “Everything’s good now. Don’t go backwards, only forward” she encouraged, moving her eyes back to the scene outside the window. 

They were quiet for a few minutes before Tammye, a little more composed, spoke again.

“You were always so brave and strong” she paused for a second to fight back more tears. “I had no idea how difficult everything that you were going through was” she shook her head and squeezed Ashlyn’s waist again. “No idea at all. I’m just so proud of you honey. I always was before” she clarified. “But now that I have a little bit different perspective on some things I’m twice as proud of you. My strong, brave girl. I love you so much baby girl.”


	9. Grown Up Time

The end of May brought with it the end of breast and bottle feeding the babies. Ashlyn and Ali had started the weaning process the week after they talked about it in the family room, when Ali told her wife that Dodge was ready. It had been a long couple of weeks for Ashlyn both emotionally and physically as her breasts started to go through their own change. The babies started drinking whole milk from a cup instead of breastmilk from a bottle during the day and that had gone really well. Dodge in particular seemed thrilled to be using more of the same things his older brother and sister used at the dinner table. Lily, as was her pattern, was fussier about it so they had to slowly mix whole milk with some breastmilk to get her to make the transition. Dr. Comello gave the two moms the same warnings she had given them when Ali stopped breastfeeding Drew. Ashlyn’s hormones were going through another major shift so the keeper might be moody or emotional as her body adjusted. The doctor also reminded them about helping Ashlyn’s large breasts make their own transition back to regular, non milk-producing breasts. The keeper seemed to think it wouldn’t be a problem and Ali chuckled softly in Dr. Comello’s exam room.

“What’s funny?” Ashlyn asked, already aggravated at her wife’s response.

“Nothing babe” Ali smiled kindly at her wife. “I’m sorry. Nothing’s funny.”

“Then why are you laughing at me?”

Dr. Comello started to say something to help diffuse the situation, seeing that Ashlyn’s mood swings may have already begun, but Ali continued instead.

“I’m not laughing at you honey, I promise” she said sincerely. “I’m laughing at me and how sure of myself I was when I was sitting where you are now” she explained carefully. “I thought it would be a piece of cake. I mean, how hard can it be to not breastfeed? Right?” 

“Spoken like a woman who has been there and done that” Patty nodded.

“What’s the point Al?” Ashlyn was frustrated and on edge.

“The point is that I couldn’t have been more wrong Ashlyn” the brunette rubbed her wife’s back lightly as she spoke. “As sore as my breasts and nipples had been for 13 months of breastfeeding, nothing hurt more than when it was time to stop. And I remember being absolutely stunned by it.”

“What do you mean they hurt?” a little bit of fear had started to mix in with the aggravation in Ashlyn’s voice.

“It takes a little bit of time, sometimes a lot of time, for your breasts to realize that they don’t need to produce milk anymore, so they keep making it even though you’re not using it...” Ali explained as helpfully as she could.

“What can happen is that your breasts get full and become engorged and painful until you express some of it to ease that pain. But only do it if you really need to because that will make your breast think you used some of the milk and it will cause the stopping to take longer” Dr. Comello explained, putting a warm hand onto Ashlyn’s knee and patting it.

“How long will it take until they stop producing milk?” the blonde looked down at her large breasts and sighed.

“It can take as little as a week or two up to a couple of months...”

“A couple of months?!”

“Mine took about a month, maybe 3-1/2 weeks” Ali offered, hoping to give her wife some more concrete details to help assuage her fears. “Just, try to be patient and you’ll get through it. I promise. If I can do it, you can do it honey.”

“That never makes me feel good Al” she shook her head sadly. “You’re tough as nails and I think you forget that sometimes.” Ashlyn turned to face her beautiful brunette. “Thank you for the vote of confidence though. I appreciate it.”

“In my medical opinion” Dr. Comello grinned and patted Ashlyn’s knee again, “you are both tough as nails and I know you’ll get through this Ashlyn. There’s no doubt in my mind, whatsoever. Just remember that your body is changing again. Be nice to yourself. Don’t worry if you feel a little unsettled for a while. And call me if you have any issues. Ok?”

“Deal. Thanks Doc.”

Over the first two weeks of June Ashlyn struggled with her engorged breasts and her out of control hormones. Ali did the best she could to help but the blonde bristled at most of her attempts. Finally, after a pretty tense first week, Ashlyn went to see Mattie, her therapist, just to check in and make sure she didn’t get too far down a bad road. She felt like maybe it was an unnecessary visit, but she promised herself after everything she went through after Josie’s frightening birth that she would never let her depression or confusion or whatever you wanted to call it get that bad again.

“It’s good to see you Ashlyn” Mattie smiled warmly and sincerely at her as they sat down to talk.

They spent several minutes on chit chat and catching up on how the blonde was doing since their last visit two months earlier. Ashlyn was going to her group meetings again, every month. That was her expectation all along – that she would get back to that sort of maintenance schedule and be able to keep everything on an even keel. So far it had been working very well and the keeper only went to see Mattie if something extra was going on, or if she and Ali were having an issue that they needed her help with, like trying to get the kids to eat their meals without Ashlyn ripping their heads off. This time Mattie listened to the blonde talk about the mixed emotions barraging her about not breastfeeding Lily any more. Ashlyn talked a little bit about how frustrating it could be to have Ali always telling her what to expect and always being right about most of those things. Before they were done, the keeper was back to feeling thankful that her wife was willing to share her experience with her and save her from all sorts of unnecessary wonder and worry about some of those things. Honestly, that’s usually how Ashlyn felt about it. She was just fucking grateful that Ali knew what was coming next because it was scary enough having your body change all around on you even when you knew what to expect. She couldn’t imagine having to do it without the heads up. 

“It’s not just Ali helping you” Mattie assured her. “Ali had help from Sydney and you, I have no doubt, will be helping Whitney the same way, hopefully, later this year.”

“Yeah” Ashlyn smiled at that thought. “I know you’re right. It’s just been such a long stretch of time where Ali’s always right and is always the one who knows what’s happening next – it feels like we’re out of balance or something. I don’t know” she tried to explain.

“It’s almost like it’s a balance of power. You two have always been very good about sharing that power, balancing it equally between you” Mattie replied thoughtfully as she leaned forward and rested her elbows on her knees. “It’s one of my favorite things about your relationship actually” she smiled. “And I’m sure it does feel off kilter now and that’s understandable. But once you’re through these last few weeks of weaning, I’m sure you’ll re-establish that balance again. I think you both prefer it that way, don’t you? Would that be a fair statement?”

“Yeah, definitely. We’re both the boss and nobody’s the boss” Ashlyn nodded. “I mean, she’s more organized about a lot of things and runs the schedule, but we don’t make decisions without each other or anything like that.”

“Good, that’s good. That’s always worked for you two in the past and I think it’s a good idea to stick with it. It’ll be harder now because there are four other people who will push and pull you off balance every chance they get. That’s life though” she smiled again. “Remember where you both get your strength from and always try to meet in the middle to get that balance back.”

“Each other” the keeper returned the therapist’s smile. “We make each other stronger, we always have.”

“That’s right, at least from where I’m sitting anyway and as long as you both haven’t had a complete personality shift in the last six months since I’ve seen you and Ali” she chuckled. “It’s not like that for everybody Ashlyn and I think it’s important to remember that. Some couples need individual alone time to get back to center or to re-energize themselves or their relationship. There’s not just one solution or answer.”

“Right” she nodded again, thinking for the millionth time how lucky she was to have found Ali.

“Anything else today? We have a few more minutes.”

“I just want to thank you again for helping me with the PTSD patients at the veterans’ hospitals in the area. I get such a great feeling after I’ve visited some of those vets I feel guilty, like I’m using them or something” she looked up shyly at the therapist.

“Surely you can see how much they get out of your visits too?” she quirked her eyebrow at the blonde. “I appreciate your modesty Ashlyn, but you’re allowed to bring good to others and feel good about it.”

“No, I know, it’s just that it makes me feel incredible. I feel so lucky and blessed most days of my life but when I go to one of the hospitals and talk to some of these men and women who are still having such a hard time with their PTSD, man, it just really takes it to a whole other level.” Her voice shook with emotion and she took a minute to compose herself. “Thank you Mattie” she squeezed out with a smile that looked like a grimace.

“You’re very welcome” she reached over and patted Ashlyn’s knee. Over the years she had learned that her patient was a toucher and a hugger and appreciated a physical reassurance every once in a while. “And are you still taking the dogs with you?”

“Just Fred” her face lit up at the thought and her emotions evened out instantly. “Persey’s just too nervous. I think she’d be great once we got her in there, but I’m kind of afraid of what it would do to her. I know that sounds weird, but...”

“It sounds perfectly you” the therapist chuckled. “We don’t completely understand the emotional toll things like that can take on an animal, especially one as empathetic as Persey. You’re smart to be cautious. But Fred does well?”

“Oh yeah, he loves it. It’s just a big huge place filled with people who want to pat him. He’s in heaven” she grinned and her dimple appeared. “I’d like to take the kids too, eventually, one at a time of course. Do you think that would be ok?”

“I think you should use your best judgment for each child, just as you’ve done with the two dogs. What one child is comfortable with may make another child very upset. And you should check with the hospital too. Usually it’s a wonderful visit for the patients, but sometimes it can be traumatic and even trigger some sort of reaction.”

“I never thought about that part of it, but of course” the keeper nodded, deep in thought. “I’ll definitely check with the staff first. Thanks Mattie, for everything.”

//

At long last Carm and Kacey’s wedding had arrived. It felt like it had been on the calendar for three years by the time June 15th finally rolled around. Ashlyn and Ali had been planning childcare for this long weekend since right after the twins had been born. The Grandparents brigade was coming through for them again. In another stroke of scheduling luck, Josie’s 3rd birthday party was the following weekend and Tammye, Carol and Deb were all planning to come back North for it. Mike Christopher was overseas on a business trip for a couple of weeks that June and couldn’t make it. And Mike Harris couldn’t afford all of the airline travel to get to the birthdays and everybody had gotten used to it. They would make sure to Facetime Chris and Beth while he was there so everybody could participate. It wasn’t as good as being there in person, but it was pretty cool. And Ken and Vicki always helped out too. They deferred to the visiting grandparents as much as possible because they knew they all missed the kids so much when they were in Florida, but Ken and Vicki were both ready to do whatever was needed during babysitting weekends. Sometimes it was something as simple as ‘take the big boys to your house for the afternoon’, and Ken would drive down to Gloucester and return to Ipswich with Drew and Cash in tow. Deb was the de facto leader simply because she had spent the most time with the grandkids during the past five summers. She couldn’t believe this was her 6th summer being a grandma. Where had the time gone? 

Sydney and Dom hadn’t been away for an overnight yet since baby Maddox was born. It had been three months and they were both ready to get out of the house. The trouble was, that left poor Sandi trying to take care of all three Dwyer boys. It was a tall order, for sure. Ali and Sydney were bridesmaids and had to be up at the Mount Washington Hotel in Carroll, New Hampshire for the rehearsal and then rehearsal dinner Friday afternoon. The wedding was late Saturday afternoon and then many of the couples were extending their stay another night and driving home Monday morning. There was no way Sandi could manage 6-1/2 year old Cash, 2-1/2 year old James, and 3 month old Maddox by herself. It was time to share the Grandparents brigade. It had taken some convincing and cajoling and flat-out strong arming to get Sydney and Dom to agree with it, but finally the Kriegers won their goodwill battle. Sandi would just stay at the big old house with her three grandsons and they would just have one big babysitting extravaganza. All of the grandparents were happy to help and, after some plans had been finalized, it sounded like it might be a fun weekend for everybody. Ken and Vicki would take Drew and Cash for a sleepover one night, and then James and Josie the next night. Deb even slept at the house instead of going back to her condo just to be sure there were enough hands on deck for everybody. Of course, the fun being had three hours north in NH was a heck of a lot more R-rated. 

Ali and Ashlyn hadn’t been up to the beautiful hotel in years and they were both kicking themselves as they walked around the luxurious space Friday afternoon before the rehearsal. They had been twice since their first, memorable, visit for Ashlyn’s birthday their very first year as a couple, both times in the winter. This was the first time they had made the trip in the summer and it was fun to see the hotel from a new perspective. Instead of fall foliage or hot chocolate and hot tubs, there was golf and swimming in the two beautiful pools – one indoor and one outdoor. They had a couple of hours to kill before rehearsal started and they couldn’t decide what they wanted to do. There were too many choices and it had been so long since they had a couple of hours to kill that they literally were unequipped to handle the decision-making. Sydney and Dom were sleeping in their room, getting a good nap in because their 3-month old baby kept them up most nights. You knew it wasn’t their first baby and that they weren’t newlyweds anymore because they didn’t even discuss having sex. All they wanted was to get some sleep and the idea of actually doing it while snuggling together was like a dream come true. Whitney was driving up Saturday with Kristie Mewis and a couple of other friends. They were all attending the wedding without their husbands or boyfriends for various reasons and looking forward to a lot of girl time. 

The rehearsal went smoothly, held in one of the function spaces on the property away from the actual hotel complex. It was located on a small hill a mile away and the hotel provided shuttle vans to get everybody to and from if they didn’t want to walk. The dinner was a pretty rowdy affair and it seemed entirely appropriate that the group moved from the private dining room on the main floor down to ‘The Cave’ on the basement level for some celebrating afterwards. Anybody who hadn’t been there before was amazed by how incredible the Prohibition-era speakeasy was. Everybody kept trying to get the two bartenders to break out of their 1920s characters, but to no avail. Both the Moscato family and the Bellamy family were filled with blue-collar, working-class people who wanted to have fun and celebrate two of their own before their big day. Carmelina Moscato’s family was half Canadian and half Italian and had come from Quincy, Massachusetts, just south of Boston. Kacey Bellamy’s family was half Irish and half French and had come from the western half of Massachusetts, out near the Berkshire Mountains. She attended UNH in Durham, NH and had considered the granite state her home ever since. Both women came from big families and had several nieces and nephews already and dozens of cousins, all of whom were in attendance. Everybody got at least a little drunk that night, except for Sydney who was trying to behave because she was freaking out enough about leaving her new baby for the first time. 

Ali, remembering exactly how sweet her best friend had been to her when she struggled to leave Drew at home for Whitney’s bachelorette party on the 4th of July, had arranged a spa half day for she and Sydney Saturday morning. She wanted to do a full day but they had bridesmaids duties after lunch and she didn’t want to wait until Sunday to get Sydney the pampering she deserved. The brunette was matching Carm drink for drink Friday night until Sydney pointedly remarked that it generally wasn’t considered cool to get one of the brides shitfaced the night before her wedding. Ali stopped drinking after that and started pushing Carm to start trading off shots of whiskey for water instead. Ashlyn and Dom had both stayed in the ‘a little drunk’ category, wanting to be social and have fun but not get themselves into any trouble on the very first night there. The keeper was still weaning, although she felt like she was really close to being finished with it altogether, and she was still moody and sore from it. Her wife had been right about how painful her breasts had become during the transition. Ashlyn honestly couldn’t say which was more painful, Lily biting her nipples or the engorged breasts she had endured for almost three weeks now. She was also woefully out of practice holding her alcohol. She hadn’t had more than a drink here or there since she had gotten pregnant with the twins back in September of 2022, 22 months ago. The blonde flashed back to Whitney’s wedding when Ali had been the one out of practice. She laughed as she remembered walking into their room to find Ali pumping breastmilk, topless, while Sydney and Kristie Mewis helped her. All three of them were drunk but Ali was really drunk. That was not going to be how Ashlyn’s weekend went down. No way. Ali wasn’t the only one who had learned a thing or two during her pregnancies.

Mercifully, they both managed to sober up enough to get themselves into bed without any major issues. They both wanted to have sex but knew it would be a mistake to try. It was already pretty late and Ali had breakfast plans with Sydney before their first spa treatment. Additionally, both Ashlyn and Ali were sick and tired of having rushed, hurried sex. They wanted to take their time with each other when they had sex that weekend, and they both hoped it happened often. The next morning while Dom went golfing with some of the guys, Ashlyn hung out by the outdoor pool with Hilary Knight and a bunch of hockey and soccer friends. Every time she turned around there were three more people she was thrilled to see and catch up with. The day flew by and before they knew it, it was time to get dressed for the wedding.

Both brides were beautiful and the ceremony and reception were funny and entertaining and sweet and heartfelt, all at the same time. 

“Hey, bridesmaid” Carm hugged Ali from behind as the brunette waited at the bar for her drink.

“Hey girl, or should I say old married hag?” she laughed as she turned around and gave the bride a proper hug. She got the bartender’s attention again and ordered Carm another drink before turning her attention back to the curly-haired wild woman. “How you doing? Everything good?”

“Everything’s fucking great” she beamed back at her college friend. “I just wanted to thank you, you know, like, officially on my wedding day.”

“Thank me for what?” Ali looked confused. “Syd’s the one who pulled the plug on the drinking last night, thank God” she laughed out loud. “I would have followed you right to hell last night and wondered what the fuck had happened.”

They both laughed and Ali handed Carm her fresh drink and paid the bartender.

“No, I’m being serious, I really want to thank you Al” her voice was definitely serious and she pulled the brunette away from the bar. They walked, arm in arm, to a quieter part of the reception area and sat down on a padded bench by the entrance hall. The bride held Ali’s hand and squeezed it as they sat and watched the dance floor together. “I’ve never been happier in my life. I love her so much and I get to spend the rest of my fucking life with her...” she stopped as her emotions caught up to her. Ali squeezed her hand back and fished a little packet of Kleenex from her clutch, taking one out and handing it to her. “I never would have found her if not for you.”

“Oh Carm, I don’t know about that” Ali soothed and rubbed her leg with her free hand. “I think when people are meant to be together, they find a way to be together. You would have found her, or maybe she would have found you instead.”

“Just shut up and take my Goddamned thanks, will ya?” she chuckled and elbowed Ali in the ribs. “Jesus Kriegy” she rolled her eyes as they both laughed and then hugged some more.

“Alright, alright. You’re welcome” she giggled her reply. “I’m so happy for you.”

“Me too. Now let’s go do some shots!”

“What’s with the long face?” Ashlyn asked as she slid into the empty chair next to Whitney. Kristie was on the other side of the lawyer and they both looked much too serious for the type of reception this was turning out to be. “Do you both miss your guys that much? Like you can’t even have a good time without them? Man” she shook her head. “That’s pathetic.”

“Oh, please” Whitney gave her an aggravated look. “Like you have a leg to stand on. You forget, I was your roomie on the road and I had to listen to all of your ridiculously sappy phone calls to your girlfriend.”

“Damn, ok” Ashlyn put her hands up in front of her, defensively. “Retract the claws. I come in peace.”

Thankfully Kristie laughed and diffused the tense situation. 

“I’m going to get a drink, anybody want anything?” Kristie asked before walking away from the table.

“No thanks.”  
“Nah, I’m good, thanks.”

The two best friends sat there for a couple of minutes before Ashlyn finally cleared her throat.

“What’s going on Whit? What can I do?” her voice was low and serious as she rubbed the lawyer’s back and tried to soothe her.

“Oh, nothing, unless you can get me pregnant” she moped and leaned back in her chair, making Ashlyn move her hand away.

“Shit, I’d do anything in the world to make that happen Whitney. I’m so sorry you’re going through this” she shook her head sadly. “I know...”

“Don’t!” she interrupted her best friend sharply. “Just, don’t say you know it’s going to happen. Because you don’t know that Ash and I’m fucking sick of people telling me that. Like, what the fuck am I supposed to say to that. ‘Oh Geez, I’m so glad you’re a future-seer. Help me win the lottery tonight and we’ll split it?’. Jesus fucking Christ” she bitched.

“Sorry” Ashlyn replied softly. “I was totally going to say that too” she chuckled, relieved when the lawyer joined her. 

“Everybody does” she rolled her eyes and sighed.

“How about this then” the keeper countered, “I know you’re not going to give up. And I’m proud of you for fighting so hard to get pregnant. That’s going to be one lucky little kid” she smiled and squeezed her best friend’s leg before patting it. “And you’re going to be the best mom in the whole world.”

“That’ll do” Whitney whimpered, trying not to let her emotions take over as she smiled through watery eyes at her kind best friend. “Thanks Ash.”

That night, as Ali and Ashlyn danced together on the big dance floor with so many of their friends, the flame finally got so hot that they couldn’t resist it any more. They both looked like a million bucks and knew it, taking every chance they got to tell the other how gorgeous they were. Ashlyn would walk up behind her wife as she spoke to another wedding guest and, politely and discreetly, put her hand on Ali’s lower back, rub her thumb over the exposed skin there once or twice, and whisper in her ear...

“You look so sexy tonight, I can’t wait to get you out of this dress and into my mouth.”

Then she would kiss her cheek sweetly and move away, letting the conversation continue after she was gone. Ali did the same thing, upping the wordplay each time without letting it get too crass. They were at a nice wedding after all. They had to follow a little bit of decorum.

“Will you two just go upstairs and fuck already?” Sydney rolled her eyes as she turned the water off in the fancy bathroom and dried her hands.

“Syd!” Ali whisper-yelled, turned red, and looked around the small, 4-stall bathroom to see who else was in there with them. A toilet flushed and Ali smacked her best friend on the arm. “You’re an ass.”

“Oh settle down girls” Erica chuckled as she came out of the stall with a sad smile on her face. “It’s only me. Your secret’s safe” she started to wash her hands. “No-one will know that the happily married couple with four little kids is still crazy enough about each other to want to have sex” she smiled warmly at Ali. “Even at this late hour.”

All three of them laughed out loud at that remark. 

“The struggle is real!” Ali laughed again. “I can’t wait to get upstairs, but there’s no way I’m leaving early because I’m having so much fun with everybody else too.”

“Sounds like a nice problem to have” Erica dried her hands and both Sydney and Ali noticed how sad she looked.

“Hey E, what’s going on? You ok?” the coach moved to the other side of their childhood friend and put her arm around her shoulder protectively.

“Are Tom and Maisy ok?” Ali put her arm around Erica’s waist from the other side and they all looked at each other in the big mirror in front of them.

“Yeah, guys, everything’s ok” she lied. “I mean, nobody’s sick or anything like that” she added quickly and then dropped her eyes.

“Talk to us sweetie, what’s happening with you?” the brunette urged as sweetly as possible.

These three, along with Liz, who was currently on the dance floor trying to decide whether or not to go back up to Kacey’s cousin’s room with him, had been friends since middle school. These four women had been there for each other when they first got their periods and had their first kisses and got their hearts broken for the first time. These girls went way back and had, for the most part anyway, stayed close for almost the whole time. There were ebbs and flows, like when Sydney and Ali had kids before Erica had even married Tom yet and Liz was single again. Their lives got hard to schedule and the four of them got together less frequently. But one of them would always be the catalyst to get them back together and on track again. It hadn’t failed in 29 years. This time Erica had pulled back, after having her first baby two years ago. She hunkered down and learned how to be a mom for herself, happy to be finally doing it instead of watching one of her friends do it. 

“Oh, it’s nothing, you know, nothing unusual anyway” she tried to shrug off the attention, wishing she had just stayed in the stall and let Ali and Sydney leave the bathroom first.

“What did he do?” Sydney bristled as the words left her own lips. “What did Tom do?”

Ali was just about to tell her to slow her roll but she swallowed the words when they both saw the shocked and guilty look on Erica’s face in the mirror.

“God E, what’s going on?” Ali’s voice was urgent and worried now. “Is Tom cheating again?”

“No!” she shook her head and closed her eyes as her face turned red. “No. I hate that that’s the first thing you guys always go to” she sighed heavily and was quiet for a few seconds. A couple of tears slid down her cheeks but she still didn’t open her eyes. “Shit.”

“Erica, you’re making us guess and we’re going to keep guessing wrong so please boo, just tell us what’s the matter” Sydney entreated, her nerves shot from exhaustion and all of the socializing she had done in the last 24 hours.

There was another interminable pause.

“He just...he’s not...”

Ali and Sydney exchanged frustrated looks as Ali rubbed their friend’s arm encouragingly.

“It’s like he doesn’t...no, that’s not the right word...it feels like he’s not there sometimes. Most of the time” she finally confessed with a small sob. She opened her eyes and scanned the faces of her friends in the mirror in front of them. “You know what I mean, right? It happens to you guys too, doesn’t it?” she looked hopefully from Ali to Sydney and back again.

“I’ve had more than a few drinks, I won’t lie” Ali started cautiously, “I’m confused...it feels like he’s not there, like as in bed? Like sex?”

“No” Sydney shook her head and frowned at Ali. “You’ve got sex on the brain, she just means in general, right E?”

“Well, yeah” she sighed again and then took a deep breath. “It feels like he doesn’t want to be there, at home with us, anymore. And I can’t tell you if it feels like he’s there when it comes to sex because we don’t really have sex very often anymore” she finally just let it out and felt a huge wave of relief wash over her as soon as she did.

“Oh” the brunette sounded surprised, because she was. Aside from a couple of big fights she and Ashlyn had had over the years where one of them needed time to think or to cool off, she didn’t know what Erica was talking about. How can you live with a person and not feel like they’re there? “Shit is right. I’m sorry E.”

“Honey, it’ll pass” Sydney reassured the upset woman. “Having a baby changes things big time in your marriage. It’s like you’re playing a game and somebody comes along...”

“Like checkers” Ali offered, helpfully.

Sydney gave her a withering look before picking up where she had left off before being interrupted.

“Somebody comes along and just shakes the board up on you. All the pieces are the same and the board is the same but they all kind of land in different places. It’s disorienting and it fucks you up if you’re not careful.”

“Careful how?” Erica asked, starting to feel a little bit better after hearing the coach’s reassuring words.

“You just have to be careful that you’re both still playing the same game” Sydney explained.

“Just when you don’t have any extra time to give, you know, because of the baby, that’s when you need to spend as much extra time as you possibly can on your wife, or husband” Ali spoke seriously. “It’s kind of a cruel joke, really. You have a baby and you’re thrilled but you’re tired all the time which messes you up – I don’t care who you are. But at the same time everything gets harder for you too, because of the baby. Even though it’s the last thing you think you have time for, you have to make the time to spend with your husband.”

“It doesn’t have to be sex either” Sydney adds. “I mean, it can be but it can’t just be sex. You’ve got to find a way to stay connected and talk through how different everything is. For him too. His whole world changed too.”

“I did all of that” Erica whines. “It’s been two years for God’s sake. Two years of feeling like I’m alone in our life.”

It took them a little bit of time to figure out what their friend was talking about. Tom just didn’t really engage with her or Maisy very much anymore. When he was home he kept to himself as much as possible. He would help with the baby when Erica asked him to do something specific, but nothing more. They had fought about it a few times and he always said that it was easier and better for everybody if he just stayed out of it because he never knew when he would mess up a schedule or do something wrong. It was one of the saddest conversations Ali had ever had in her whole life. They were talking about Tom and Erica here. They were a rock solid couple who both wanted to get married and who both wanted to have a baby. Erica seemed like she was glad they had talked about it together, even though she was upset that the first thing they thought of was that Tom was cheating on her.

“Sorry about that” Sydney apologized. “But you know how it is. Your friend who’s in love with the guy that cheated is able to forgive him, somehow, and they go on with their life together and make everything work ok. But the friends, who aren’t in love with him, have a hard time forgiving him and an impossible time forgetting what he did to you” she squeezed Erica’s shoulders in her grasp. “I can’t help it E.”

“I know” she frowned. “It sucks. But I can’t change the past.”

“Keep trying to get him to talk. It’s the only way Ash and I make it work. Talk, even if you think you don’t need to.”

The three friends hugged it out, promised to check in with each other more often and rejoined the reception as it started to wind down. Liz came to tell them about Kacey’s cousin and Ali slipped away to go find her keeper.

“There you are” Ashlyn said softly when she felt her wife’s arms wrap around her from behind. “I was just about to start looking for you. Everything ok?” she put her arms on top of Ali’s arms at her waist and turned her head to the side to try and get a look at her beautiful brunette.

Ali leaned forward and kissed the blonde’s cheek, squeezing her stomach tighter.

“Yeah, no, I don’t know” she shook her head, trying to clear some of the alcohol and the frightening thoughts out of it. “I love you so much Ashlyn. Please tell me you know that. Please tell me you know I’m still here.”

The worry in the brunette’s voice made Ashlyn uneasy and nervous but she knew Ali would fill her in on whatever was going on soon enough. Ashlyn could tell this moment was just about the two of them.

“I know you love me honey, just as much as I love you, which is an obscene amount” the keeper replied, happy to reassure the love of her life. “Do you remember that poem about this, about our love?” she asked softly, turned around and tenderly kissed her wife’s lips.

“Tell me” Ali took a deep breath and rested her head on her wife’s strong shoulder as they stood and hugged. She listened to Ashlyn’s voice, clear and strong as it recited the words to the poem they both knew by heart.

“You can never feel  
all of the ways in which  
I love you, just as you  
can never touch the   
infinite stars, but I  
promise you, my love,   
that I will light your  
skies, and show you  
every one.”

-a.r. asher


	10. Let's Not Leave the Room

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut warning...
> 
> And instead of my usual rant about Ali Krieger getting snubbed continuously, I'm just going to say this:  
> I will not donate another penny to US Soccer because of the way Jill Ellis has treated Krieger since the WWC 2015. When they call me every few weeks to remind me to donate again, after my annual gift is up, I'll tell each desk jockey the same thing. The disrespect and disdain that Ellis has shown Krieger is completely appalling. Kriegs should have gotten her 100th cap last year, in 2016. Then, if Ellis insisted on running her off the team she could have done that and not left her hanging at 98 fucking caps. 98 fucking caps. It's just so insulting. And Krieger is one of the very best outside backs the USWNT has ever had!!! I'm not just saying that because I love her. Go back and look at who has played OB for the USWNT and tell me who was better? There aren't very many, if any. So - that's how I feel and I can't wait to tell them when they call me. Because they call you if you don't re-up. I waited until the last possible second this year because of the equal pay dispute. Well, not this time. Just give her the two caps and, even though she still deserves playing time on the team, we'll all be happy with a dignified and well-earned celebratory game for her. Then I won't bitch again. Fucking idiot Jill fucking Ellis.  
> Ok, so maybe I ranted anyway. Sigh. I'm just so mad about it. When has this ever happened before? Are there other players that are at 90+ caps that were forced out of the team (not by injury)? I'm gonna have to look that up now because I'm curious.
> 
> Update: The answer is No. No-one has ever gotten to even 90 caps and then not gotten their 100. The two closest were Stephanie Cox who got to 89 caps and Amy LePeilbet who got to 84 caps.  
> Thanks to Jen Cooper at Keeper Notes for the stats.  
> And fuck you Jill Ellis you fucking bitch!!!

The first time they had sex that night it was rushed and hurried because they were desperate for each other. Ali was still spooked by Erica’s woes and Ashlyn was still perplexed by what had changed her wife’s playful, flirty mood into such a troubled one. All Ali wanted was to feel connected to her wife, as closely as possible and as quickly as possible. Their orgasms had been fast and strong and wonderful and had left them tangled together, hot and sweaty and panting. It was only after this first connection of the night had been established that Ali could tell her keeper about her talk with Erica and Sydney that evening. 

“Baby, that’s never going to be us” she asserted, squeezing Ali tightly and trying to show her with her arms as well as her words. “We know what we’ve got. We know how special it is and how incredible it is, both of us.”

“But what if we forget? Or what if we just get too busy or caught up with the kids or life or...”

“One of us will always remember. If I forget then you’ll remind me. And then next time, when you forget, I’ll remind you. That’s how we’ve gotten this far honey. Neither one of us thinks marriage is easy, right?”

“Right” Ali agreed. “We both know it’s hard and it takes work and attention and care...”

“And love” Ashlyn added emotionally, her voice shaking just a little. “Al, that’s half the battle right there. We KNOW it’s not easy. And we’re both here, loving each other, willing to do the work and make the time.”

“Yeah, we are.”

“Always baby. Always” the keeper brought their lips together in a slow, romantic kiss that was full of everything they were just talking about. “I love you Ali.”

They lay quietly in each other’s arms for a few minutes. Their hands lazily stroked the soft skin of arms and stomachs and thighs, just making sure of one another. The desperate emotions started to smooth themselves out until the panic was completely gone from Ali’s heart and mind.

“Oh, thank God” she exhaled, finally feeling at peace again. “That fucking freaked me out” she shook her head.

“Feel better now sugarplum?” Ashlyn tried to lighten the mood a bit.

“I do” the brunette chuckled. “Thank you for letting me lose my mind for a minute there.

“Thank you for letting me know you needed to. See how that works?”

“I got it Ash” she giggled. “I’m the one who used to have to beg you to talk about stuff, remember?”

“I do remember and I’m so thankful you did” she shook her head and smiled at her wife. “I can’t imagine how any of this works if we didn’t get that squared away right off the bat. All thanks to my amazing, hot, smart, sexy, delicious, wife” she teased, pressing sultry kisses into Ali’s skin after each adjective.

They spent the next two hours making love, taking their time with each other the way they had both been craving. Each woman lavished attention to their favorite places on the other’s body, embracing those spots like long lost friends and then worshipping them like only a long-time lover could. It was slow and soft and tender and reverent and heavenly. It was just what they needed to soothe the cracks that had started to form from months and months of doing the best they could with the little private time they could manage. It was one of those rare times where they lost track of who had come how often, letting time stand still and just doing what felt good when it felt right. It didn’t matter that they didn’t use any new sex toys or try any new positions that night. It didn’t matter that they said a lot of the same things they always said to each other when they had sex. They weren’t pretending to be new to each other and they didn’t want to be. Both women loved the fact that they knew each other and each other’s body so well after 8-1/2 years of having sex together. That night was about worshipping one another and reacquainting each other with the often-overlooked pieces of skin that might have started to wilt without their nourishment. It was everything they had both hoped for and so much more.

Sunday was one of the best, most relaxing and most fun days they had spent in a long time. Sydney and Ali had to go to the wedding party brunch but almost half of the wedding attendees were there as well. Everybody ate and laughed and told stories about the night before. The Kriegers slept as late as possible and then rushed through separate showers to make it downstairs on time. They were energized and happy and Sydney shared a knowing look with her best friend that made them both smile.

“You look extra good this morning” Sydney teased lightly as they stood in line at the carving station. The coach was genuinely happy for her bestie. She loved seeing Ali so happy. “Worked up an appetite I’ll bet” she smirked.

Ali couldn’t help but giggle and nudge Sydney’s arm. 

“Sure did” she sighed happily and got a dreamy look across her face as the coach put her arm around her shoulder and pulled her into a side hug.

“You ok? I could tell our chat with Erica really messed with your head last night” Sydney asked quietly after looking around to make sure nobody could hear them.

“Yeah, it really did. But we talked about it and I felt better” she explained, resting her head on her best friend’s shoulder. “We’re so lucky Syd, both of us, that we have such great partners. I feel just awful for Erica” she shook her head and straightened up as the line moved forward.

“I know” Sydney squeezed her shoulders one last time and then let them go as they picked up plates and moved up. “Dom’s so not perfect and I want to kill him about four times a day these days” she rolled her eyes. “But he’s there, you know? Dom’s fucking there and I know he’s not going to just disappear. Fuck that.”

“Exactly” Ali agreed. “I can’t imagine that. And two years after she had Maisy!” she whisper-yelled her dismay. “I’ve always liked Tom too. I just don’t get it.”

“Guys are funny about babies sometimes though” Sydney thought out loud. “Maybe he’ll get over it?” she shrugged. 

“It’s been two years!” Ali repeated animatedly. “They need to go talk to someone, like a marriage counselor or something. Two years in they should be getting their life back to normal and just enjoying their little girl. The only thing they should be having problems with is lack of sleep.”

“Let’s suggest the counselor next time we talk to her” the coach nodded. 

After brunch the newlyweds departed for their honeymoon, with much fanfare and a car decorated with all sorts of raunchy accessories, slogans, streamers and balloons, and most of the remaining wedding guests followed suit. A handful of friends stayed behind to enjoy another day at the beautiful hotel, including Ali and Ashlyn as well as Sydney and Dom. The two couples had plans to meet for breakfast Monday morning before driving home to rescue the grandparents from the 7 grandchildren in their care. They didn’t even want to think about what condition the house would be in when they got home. That was stress for another day. Sydney and Dom were looking forward to spending some real alone time together for the first time since Maddox had been born. Ali had teased her best friend about not napping the whole afternoon away. She encouraged her to enjoy a sexy nap, at least. The coach had admitted to being more self-conscious than ever about her post-partum body because it became more and more difficult to whip it back into shape after each baby. 

“Just relax boo” Ali hugged her best friend after brunch and spoke into her ear. “It’s only been three months. You’re not supposed to look any different yet. You know that” she squeezed her and kissed her cheek as they pulled apart. “And he loves you no matter what. He’s one of the good ones. Just...” she paused as Sydney opened her eyes and met her kind gaze, “get out of your head and just...be.”

“You’re right Alibaba” she sighed heavily and blushed a little bit. “I just have to shut my mind off for a while and be cool. I can do that...I hope” she giggled.

“Call me if you need me” the brunette called over her shoulder as she stepped into the elevator Ashlyn was holding for them. “Have fun!”

Ashlyn and Ali had made tentative plans to go for a hike and maybe a swim that afternoon, followed by a couples massage in the spa before dinner – if they could get one scheduled on such short notice. But after their night spent reconnecting and rediscovering each other’s body neither one of them wanted to do anything other than get naked again. 

“So, I was thinking...” Ashlyn began as they rode up in the elevator on the way to change for their hike. “Maybe instead of a hike we could...”

“I don’t want to leave the room” Ali blurted out, thankful that they were alone in the elevator and surprised by her inability to handle the situation like an adult. She felt, and sounded, like a teenager who had just discovered how much she enjoyed sex.

“Ok” the keeper chuckled and pulled her blushing wife into a hug. “I was kind of hoping the same thing but I was going to ease into the suggestion a little bit.”

Ali buried her head in Ashlyn’s chest and mumbled something the keeper couldn’t quite hear. She turned her head and lifted her lips up to the blonde’s neck and pressed her lips against the soft skin, kissing her gently and bringing her hand up to cup Ashlyn’s cheek. The keeper may not have understood what her wife had said, but she definitely got the message she was sending her now. She pulled Ali in closer and held her body tightly against her own, turning her head to the side and kissing Ali’s palm with a soft hum.

“So not leaving the room it is” she said into the brunette’s palm and then kissed it again. “Best plan ever.”

Two hours later they had fucked each other with all of the abandon and aggression that had been absent the night before. Last night had been slow and romantic and sexy and that afternoon had been fast and furious and hot as fuck. Every long lost body part that they touched the night before demanded to be touched again, only harder and faster and both women were only too happy to oblige. They were insatiable as they scratched itches that they hadn’t allowed themselves to acknowledge in months.

“Goddamn that was awesome” Ashlyn panted as she flopped down onto the bed, strap-on still in place around her hips. “Are you ok baby? Was that too much?” she rolled over onto her side and reached out to touch Ali’s sweaty back, making the brunette’s skin twitch when she made contact.

“Sooooooo good” Ali managed to get out around her own pants as she tried to catch her breath. She rolled over onto her back and reached her arm out to grab her wife’s hip or thigh or any part of her gorgeous body, just so she could feel it again. “God that was good. I love when you fuck me like that. Mmmmmmm” she hummed out happily as her chest rose and fell rapidly. 

“Me too” the keeper chuckled and unhooked the harness, taking the dildo out of it and bringing it up to her lips. “Mmmmmm” she moaned as she licked all of Ali’s passion from the thick toy. It was light blue with all of the knobs the brunette loved so much. “So good...”

They had each packed the other’s favorite strap-on and the harness they used. They had their own harnesses because it was just easier than having to tighten or loosen or adjust the one they used to share. Anything to save time those days. Ali brought a new set of lingerie too but it hadn’t seen the light of day. At least not so far anyway. The brunette still hoped she could wear it later that night. They would have to take a break and eat some dinner at some point. She planned to slip into the bathroom and surprise her keeper with the sultry new set before their nighttime festivities started. She rolled onto her side, facing Ashlyn, and pulled the dildo away from her lips.

“Hey, I wasn’t done with...”

Ali put her own lips where the toy had just been and smirked when she heard her wife moan into the passionate kiss. She pulled her body right up close to Ashlyn’s and slipped her thigh between her keeper’s legs, pressing it up against her core and groaning when she felt all the wetness pooled there.

“Fuck Ashlyn” she husked out, instantly turned on again at the wet, warm sensation on her leg. 

The blonde crashed their lips together again in another heated kiss that made them both a little lightheaded. They made out for a while as their hands roamed and tweaked and groped and scratched. They were both hot and bothered again after ten minutes of tantalizing touches and kisses. Ali pulled on her wife’s hips, wanting to get the blonde on top of her. Ashlyn took the cue and straddled Ali’s strong thigh, still between her legs, as she sat up and let her hands go to the brunette’s breasts. They studied each other’s faces for another minute as the keeper began to grind slowly against Ali’s leg.

“I don’t think I’ll ever get over how beautiful you are Ashlyn” she shook her head slowly, never taking her eyes off of her wife. “You’re exquisite. You’re a work of art” she spoke earnestly as she raised her hands up to touch her keeper’s collarbone and chin and neck. “You’re a masterpiece” she exhaled as her emotions rose to the surface, making her bottom lip quiver. “I love you” she whispered as she fought back tears.

Ashlyn cocked her head, needing only a few seconds to understand that her wife wasn’t actually upset. She kept grinding, enjoying Ali’s nimble fingers as they trailed down between her breasts, still in a nursing bra. 

“I love you too honey. Thank you, for always making me feel like that...” she got choked up herself as she spoke. 

Ashlyn bent down and met Ali’s lips with a slow, deep kiss that had them both moaning by the time they came up for air. The keeper kept grinding as she admired her wife’s gorgeous body beneath her. As turned on as she was by the incredible sight, she was even more moved by the reverence Ali had shown when she paid her those heartfelt compliments. She would do anything for her beautiful brunette, anything that would make her happy or bring her pleasure. Anything.

Ali ran her hands down the blonde’s stomach and then back up again, sliding them to her sides and raking her short nails gently down to her hips. She had hoped to be able to touch Ashlyn’s beautiful breasts at some point this weekend. She knew it was cutting it close to the time they both thought she would be finished producing milk, but it was so hard to predict. Her breasts were still really big but Ashlyn had told her they weren’t quite as sore as they had been two weeks ago, or even just last week. The keeper could tell her body was making the transition, she could feel that awful fullness going away little by little. Ashlyn knew the large, milk-producing breasts would disappear forever in probably another week, maybe two and it made her sad as well as excited. She could still feel the sticky milk that had leaked out of her nipples during both of her orgasms that afternoon. She definitely wouldn’t miss that, but she knew her wife would. But they were both going to be happy to have her normal breasts back in their lives. Ashlyn remembered how much she had missed touching Ali’s breasts after she breastfed Drew. She knew her breasts would leak again with this next orgasm they were working towards and she had an idea.

“Will you help me with something” her voice was still emotional but she managed to get the words out and sound almost normal.

“Anything babe” Ali replied with a kind, inquisitive look.

“I want to take this off, but I’ll need you to hold my boobs for...”

“Yes” the brunette tried hard to hide the excitement in her voice. She would help her wife with anything but she didn’t want to come across like some lech who was only agreeing to help because it was something that turned her on so much. “Whatever you need Ash.”

The keeper smiled and reached behind her to unhook the light grey nursing bra. She let Ali carefully pull it from her arms and put it beside them on the bed. It would have been sexier to fling it across the room, but she didn’t want to do that in case Ashlyn needed it again. As soon as the soft skin and the pink nipples were exposed Ali felt her core twitch, almost painfully. The large, beautiful breasts swung gently with Ashlyn’s movement against her wife’s thigh. The brunette was so distracted by the sight of them, it was pretty rare, that she was momentarily frozen.

“Well, are you gonna help me or what?” Ashlyn teased lightly as she watched Ali’s face flush and then come back to life after the momentary stun.

“What do you want me to do?” her face was a picture of concentration now as she focused on the task at hand and tried to control her mounting lust.

“Same thing I did for you a few times” the blonde explained. “Just hold them for me so they don’t move too much. And I’ll ride you...”

“Do you want the strap-on again?” Ali was confused and frowned as she tried to understand. Usually Ashlyn only liked the dildo once per sexcapade and she had already fucked her with it and given her one of the biggest orgasms she had ever had.

“No” Ashlyn shook her head and pulled Ali’s hands to her breasts, helping her get to work. “Not inside me anyway.” She reached to the other side of them and grabbed Ali’s blue, knobby dildo and laid it lengthwise along the thigh she was already grinding on. She lifted herself up and then shifted slightly so she was now grinding along the shaft of the dildo, squeaking the first time she hit one of the knobs.

“Is that gonna work?” the brunette asked, her voice hoarse from the desire she was trying to control. “Does it feel ok?”

“Yeah” Ashlyn closed her eyes for a few seconds and shifted her weight a bit. She had most of her weight on her own knees, straddling Ali’s left thigh. Her right hand was on Ali’s left hip and her left hand on her stomach as she kept grinding. “It feels really good” she opened her eyes to stare into the darkening chocolate ones below her. “Am I hurting you?”

“No, not at all” the brunette sucked in a breath as Ashlyn applied more pressure and started moving faster against the toy and her thigh. The look of pleasure on the blonde’s face was sexy as hell and Ali felt her own core twitch again. “Fuck, that’s hot” she breathed out.

“Don’t forget your job up here” Ashlyn reminded her with a small smirk, starting to get too worked up to tease.

But there was no way Ali could forget that. She was beside herself with excitement to be holding her wife’s breasts in her hands. She wanted to lick them and suck on them, just a little, but didn’t want to seem greedy.

“Can I...lick them” she stammered out, willpower shot to hell already.

“Yeah” the keeper moaned at her own pleasure. “Just... not too hard.”

The brunette sat up, still supporting the breasts with her hands underneath them and applying just enough pressure to keep them from bouncing around without squeezing them too hard. She licked her lips and swallowed nervously. Now that she was closer to them she could see the breastmilk that had leaked out earlier and got even more turned on. Her first few licks were soft and tentative and focused exclusively on the breast itself and not the nipples. Those pretty pink nipples were darker and slightly misshapen from all the hard work they’d been doing. But Ali knew that would change in a month or two. The nipples would go back to their pretty light pink color and go back to the normal shape once they stopped being sucked on several times a day.

“Mmmmmmmmm” Ashlyn groaned loudly when she felt Ali’s lips on her most sensitive skin those days. “God, yeah” she grunted out and put even more pressure into her grinding. “Lick my nipples” she urged, her eyes closed as she started her climb. “Softly.”

Ali followed her instructions and gently lapped at the areola around one of the nipples before working her tongue gently around the nipple itself. She stopped immediately when she heard her wife gasp loudly.

“Did I hurt you?” she mumbled against the side of the other breast as she looked up at Ashlyn’s face for an answer.

“No, feels good” her words were clipped and Ali knew she was getting close to her release. “Keep going.”

The brunette lapped at the other nipple, slowly and carefully. She felt another gush of passion between her own legs when Ashlyn gasped again. Ali took her time and moved from one breast to the other, being as gentle as possible and moving in to lick her nipples every third or fourth lick. Ashlyn was climbing fast now, the knobs and the licks causing pleasure to shoot up through her body as she kept working towards her release. She moved her left hand down to her own clit and started to rub it, groaning again at the incredible sensation.

“Oh fuck Al, I’m so close...”

“Mmmmmmmmm... you taste so fucking good Ash. Jesus you’re incredible...” she moaned and mumbled and hummed as her lips and tongue swirled gently around both of her nipples and breasts. It was getting difficult for Ali to hold onto the breasts as Ashlyn moved her body faster and faster against the dildo and Ali’s leg. “Fuck babe” she groaned out when she started to feel dizzy from her own desire.

It was only another minute or two before Ashlyn came with another loud gasp. The medium-size orgasm hit her and she bent forward as her body shook from the pleasure. Ali did her best to hold onto her breasts but it was hard, especially once the keeper bent over and rested her forehead on Ali’s shoulder.  
“Oh!” Ali yelped when she felt something warm running down both of her hands. It was breastmilk and she felt stupid for reacting with such surprise. She knew it happened when Ashlyn had an orgasm. She lay back against the bed again and let her keeper drop carefully down on top of her as the aftershocks moved through her body. “Yeah babe, I’ve got you” Ali cooed into her wife’s ear before she kissed her cheek, right next to it.

“Ughh” Ashlyn groaned and grimaced.

“Here” Ali quickly rolled them onto their sides so Ashlyn’s body weight wasn’t pressing down on her sore breasts. She still had both hands supporting them for her wife. “Do you want me to move my hands now?”

“Yeah” she grunted and made another pained face. “Thanks.”

“I’m sorry honey...I didn’t know what to do...”

“Please don’t be sorry Al” Ashlyn finally smiled and opened her eyes to look at her beautiful wife. “That felt awesome, thank you for letting me do that.” 

Ashlyn leaned forward and kissed her wife’s lips soundly, breaking for air because she was still trying to catch her breath.

“Are you gonna clean that up or...” she smirked at the brunette who just looked back at her with wide eyes.

“Can I?”

“Yes baby, please” she beamed at her wife as a look of excitement took over her favorite face. “I don’t know how many more times we’ll have the chance to do this. I really want you to Al.”

The emotion in her voice moved the brunette immensely. Ali brought their lips together in a meaningful kiss as she gently caressed the side of the breast she could get at. Ashlyn smiled at her again and moved some of her brunette hair back, away from her neck before kissing her lips and then changing her position again. She sat up against the headboard, propped up with pillows, and hummed happily when Ali straddled her thighs, leaned forward, and carefully started to lick underneath her breasts where some of the milk had dripped.

“Mmmmmmmmmm...” the brunette moaned loudly as a shiver went through her whole body when she tasted the milk on her tongue.

Ashlyn smiled as she watched the most beautiful face in the world contort in pleasure as it worked on one of her breasts. Ali’s eyes were closed and she almost looked rapturous as she enjoyed her special treat. The keeper moved her own hands into the space between their bodies and placed both of them on the brunette’s breasts, palming the nipples and squeezing softly. Ali was lying on top of the blonde’s stomach, supporting the weight of the top of her body with her arms while her knees found purchase on either side of Ashlyn’s thighs.

“Feels good baby...I love your tongue so much...” the keeper purred and then sucked in a breath when Ali switched to the other breast. 

The brunette was too far gone to even speak anymore. She felt another wave of passion pool between her legs and her breath hitched when her lips started to work on the new breast. Ali was very aware that this was special. That this was very likely the last time she would get to have this experience in her entire life. The significance was not lost on her and she would never be able to thank her incredibly thoughtful wife for allowing her to have this moment. Leave it to her sweet Ashlyn to be so fucking considerate and kind and wonderful. Between the emotion of her wife’s selfless act and the exciting sensations she was experiencing at her favorite nipples, milky and delicious, Ali was losing her mind. She had gotten hornier and hornier as Ashlyn had ridden her leg and now she felt like she could come at the slightest touch. Ali was so focused on her keeper’s nipples that she hadn’t really moved the rest of her body at all for the past ten minutes or so. Another jolt of pleasure hit her core and got her attention.

“Oh!” she exclaimed and then quickly recovered, closing her whole mouth around Ashlyn’s nipple and blowing hot air on it to make her keeper moan.

“Jesus Al” the blonde moaned and increased the pressure she was putting on Ali’s breasts. She felt her nipples start to stiffen and tugged on them to help them stand up nice and straight. “Fuck...”

“Mmmmmmmmm...” was all the brunette seemed able to respond with, but the groan was loud and long as she enjoyed the pleasure coming from her own breasts. 

Ali began grinding their mounds together, rolling her hips and dragging her hot, wet center up past Ashlyn’s mound and then sliding it back down again, applying extra pressure as she moved her aching clit down past her keeper’s mound again. It was one of Ali’s favorite things to do and she often did it without even consciously thinking about it. If their hips were near each other like this, she just started grinding and dragging her sensitive clit up and down, meeting the hard resistance Ashlyn offered by tilting her own hips just a bit so her mound stood up extra tall. 

“Yeah baby, damn you feel good on me...are you gonna come like that? Just like that?” the keeper teased hotly as she felt Ali’s body tremble against her. “Shit that’s hot...”

This position had only worked for them once before and it was the very first night they had ever had sex. They were both so excited and turned on that Ali actually came from this very same motion, her orgasm and body spasms carrying Ashlyn to her own climax right after her. They had tried to repeat the success several times but to no avail. It always felt good and Ali loved to get worked up with it, but there had never been another orgasm as a direct result. But goddamn if the brunette wasn’t about to come that way this time. Something about the extra meaning and the very special occasion and the fucking breastmilk...Ali didn’t understand it but she suddenly became aware of the fact that an orgasm had started to form deep in her core and was working its way up. She pressed harder against Ashlyn’s mound and sped up her strokes. She dragged her clit up and back, faster and harder, as her breathing picked up and her heart started to race.

“Oh my God” she mumbled against her keeper’s breast.

Ashlyn felt the change too. She moved her hands to Ali’s voluptuous ass and grabbed hold, pressing the brunette’s body even harder against her own and moaning at the contact.

“Suck my nipples...” she commanded breathily, her own chest rising and falling rapidly along with Ali’s. “Oh fuck that feels good...” she threw her head back against the pillows, taking her eyes off of the brunette’s face for the first time since they started this position. “I want you to come while you suck on them...”

It was almost too much for the brunette. She got so excited at her wife’s sexy and raspy voice that she lost her rhythm for a few seconds and Ashlyn had to help her get it back. Ali sucked one of her keeper’s nipples into her mouth, still trying not to be too rough although having a hard time staying in control there. She swirled her hot tongue around the nipple a few times, and then flicked her tongue against it twice. She sucked again and felt Ashlyn’s back arch which drove the brunette wild. 

“Use your teeth...”

Ali felt like the bottom had just dropped out on a roller coaster ride. She was free-falling and had the butterflies in her stomach to prove it. Hearing Ashlyn’s voice, roughly telling her what to do to her big, beautiful breasts, was all she needed to get her past the last hurdle towards her release. Her swollen clit felt amazing as it rubbed against her wife’s mound at a rapid pace. And when she lightly dragged her teeth across the areola around Ashlyn’s nipple she felt another gush of her own juices start to flow. Ashlyn could tell she was close because she had started lightly sweating and her face was completely flushed. She forced her eyes to stay open so she could watch Ali’s beautiful face experience the orgasm that was seconds away.

“Fuck Ali...bite the other one” she grunted out and moved her own hand back to the brunette’s breast.

Ali did as she was told and nibbled gently on the side of Ashlyn’s other breast, gasping when she heard her wife groan deeply. Two seconds later she felt her keeper pinch her nipple hard and that was all it took to send her hurtling over the edge.

“Ohhhhhh...yessssssssssss!!!!!!” she shouted loudly as she came hard. Every part of her skin that touched Ashlyn’s felt like it was on fire and her body shook and twitched as the orgasm crashed down around her. It took every bit of willpower she had not to be too rough with the blonde’s breasts. She tried to keep her flailing movements away from them entirely while she thrashed around on top of her. “Fuck Ashlyn!!!”

The keeper held her tightly against her, wrapping her arms around Ali’s back and rolling them onto their sides to ride it out. She slid her thigh up between Ali’s legs to give her something to grind on if she needed to but, after a couple of long minutes, the brunette finally just went completely slack. Ashlyn continued to hold her and kiss her cheek and jaw and neck and shoulder wherever she could reach. They were both quiet as their chests heaved and they panted out their breath.

“Doesn’t this hurt, babe?” Ali finally managed to ask, gasping for breath twice before completing the question.

“No” she replied and beamed back at her beautiful brunette, pulling her head back a bit so they could look at each other. “I feel great. That was incredible” she grinned and kissed Ali’s lips softly. “I can’t believe you came like that again...” she paused and her face fell for a second. “You did come, didn’t you?”

“Ummm, yeah” she chuckled breathlessly. “Where were you?” she teased.

“Oh I had the best seat in the house” she smirked and reached down to grab Ali’s ass. “I was just checking. I’m still amazed that you can get off like that” she shook her head in admiration as she caressed her wife’s ass and gave it a pat. “It’s fucking sexy as hell.”

Ali laughed and blushed as the keeper kissed her lips for a minute.

“Well, that’s a grand total of two times and I’m pretty sure you deserve the credit” the brunette laughed again as she leaned back and shamelessly stared at Ashlyn’s chest. “These beauties...” she paused and smiled as she looked at them in front of her, “thank you so much honey. I know that probably didn’t feel great for you but I...well, I loved it” she blushed again. “You’re just the sweetest” she kissed her lips, “sexiest” she kissed them again, “most amazing” another kiss, “wife in the whole world” she finished with a bigger kiss. “I’m so fucking lucky Ashlyn and I know it. I love you so much and I don’t care what goes on in our lives, I will never take you for granted or forget how special you are” her voice was thick with emotion. “Thank you sweetheart.”

The rest of the night was one big blur of skin. They took a nap and then had some really hot shower sex before ordering room service for dinner. Ashlyn insisted they both stay naked except for when Ali dealt with the room service waiter. Ali insisted that Ashlyn put her nursing bra back on, eventually, because she would rather have more sex with the bra on than stop having sex because it was too uncomfortable for the blonde. The other rule was that they had to keep in constant touch, somehow, even if it was just the bottom of a foot against a thigh. The brunette tried to put the lingerie on but her wife told her to save it for another time. This night was just for them and their naked skin and being together. It was their revised version of the intimate bubble time they used to share together at the big old house before they had kids. They were so caught up in their own private bubble world that night that they forgot to check in on the kids. Ashlyn remembered it at almost midnight but it was much too late to do anything about it. She let Ali kiss the worry and guilt away and bring her to yet another orgasm instead. By the end of the night, at 1am, they were both sore and over-sensitive. They squeezed into the tub together to try and soak away some of the raw skin and bruised flesh they had worked so hard for. It was the best kind of sore and it had been so long since they had felt that way that they were happier than usual about trying to soothe their bodies. 

In the morning, without even discussing it, they continued the rule about keeping touch as much as possible. They showered together and stood close to each other as they brushed their teeth and got their make-up on. They even dressed each other in a surprisingly sweet few moments that Monday morning. They held hands until they finally had to let go at the breakfast table, the practicality of feeding their starving, over-worked bodies taking precedent for once. Sydney and Dom seemed as blissed out as they did, well, almost. Both couples were happy to see each other but stayed close to their spouses, trying to stretch the magic intimacy for as long as possible. The hand-holding continued for Ali and Ashlyn during the long drive home as they talked about their weekend and shared more stories about their wedding reception experiences. It wasn’t until both cars pulled into the driveway of the big old house just before lunchtime on Monday that the bubble burst. But nobody was upset about it. All four of them missed their children and were glad to greet everybody inside and hear all about their adventures while they ate their lunch. It was hard to feel bad about the loss of contact with your wife when there was so much sweet contact with the tiny loves of your life instead. As much as Ali and Ashlyn missed their alone time they knew nothing would ever make them feel as complete as being surrounded by their children. But it was a delicate balance and they knew it. Even if Ali hadn’t been terrified by what was happening with Erica and Tom, she would have spent the weekend the same exact way. It might not have been quite so desperate or all-consuming, but maybe that was just exactly what they needed. It had been a good reminder and both couples redoubled their efforts to stay connected and in touch and in love. That weekend would be remembered and talked about for a very long time.


	11. The Big C

The following weekend they celebrated Josie’s third birthday and Kyle’s 41st. He had come up to Gloucester for all of the kids’ birthdays that summer and made a point to film each of them on their actual birthday. Since he graduated NYU film school in January he had been making all sorts of short films about things he was passionate about in NYC. He had become increasingly vocal in his support for different social causes over the past 7 or 8 years and it was only natural that he would start to make films about them as well. He liked the medium of short documentary films because there were so many people and groups he wanted to talk about and shine a light on that he was able to get to more of them that way. One of his short films about transgender people of color had been invited to show at the prestigious NY film festival coming up in September that year. His public and professional persona was an interesting dichotomy and he didn’t shy away from either side of it. Kyle was still his goofy, affable, honest, fun-loving, sweetheart self on his YouTube channel. And he still posted his photographs on Instagram and was wildly popular in both endeavors. But then there was this serious, dark part of him that made these stark, brutally honest short documentary films about subjects that made people cringe sometimes when they didn’t want to face what was wrong with the world. The whole family was proud of him and kept encouraging him to follow his muse. Kyle had never been happier and it was obvious to everyone around him. When Ali asked him what he was doing with the kids’ footage he told her he wasn’t sure yet but he just knew he had to interview each kid on their birthday.

“I feel like such a late bloomer” he groaned and rolled his eyes the Wednesday after Carm and Kacey’s wedding. He had taken the train up just for the day so he could film and interview Josie on her birthday. “It’s embarrassing” he chuckled.

“Don’t say that” Ali chastised him softly as they sat next to each other on the couch in her office in Cambridge. He had stopped to see her on his way back to the train that afternoon. “There’s no age limit on anything. We all made that up just to torture each other” she asserted and squeezed his leg.

“Who are you and what have you done with my sister?” he giggled and looked at her suspiciously.

“I know” she laughed and ducked her head shyly. “I used to be the worst offender but Ashlyn always says age is only a number. She’s actually got me believing it now” she smiled and gave her brother a side hug. “Besides, one of my favorite women in the world didn’t figure out what she wanted to do with her life until she was 37 years old. You’re right on her schedule and if you’re half as successful as she was you’ll be doing alright” she patted his leg encouragingly. 

“Are you going to make me guess?” he gave her a pathetic sideways glance and some pretty sad puppy dog eyes.

“Lazy” she rolled her eyes and grinned. “Julia Child didn’t enroll in culinary school until she was 37. She had already lived a pretty exciting and fulfilling life up to that point too” she spoke animatedly about one of her heroes. “I mean, she worked for the OSS – which became the CIA, and invented a shark repellent during World War II to help the navy sink German U-boats for crying out loud.”

“Wait, Julia Child the tv chef was a spy?” Kyle’s jaw dropped.

“Well, she was more of the person who did all the hard work in the office so the spies could do their jobs, but that’s not the point” she shook her head. “The point is, she didn’t find her passion until she moved to France after the war and discovered french cuisine. She had just gotten married and wanted to be able to cook for the person she loved. And that’s how she realized what she wanted to do with the rest of her life. 37” she emphasized each number and squeezed her brother’s cheeks as she distinctly said each one.

“Wow” he said after moving Ali’s hand away from his face. “That really is amazing.”

“And don’t even get me started with all the bullshit she had to deal with as a woman trying to get into the Cordon Bleu culinary school. Stupid men” she rolled her eyes again.

“Hey” Kyle was indignant.

“Well, not you” she giggled. “Obviously. You should read her biography. She was awesome. And she lived right here in Cambridge until almost the very end of her life. But my favorite thing about her, well, one of them anyway, is her dieting advice.”

“Oh, this oughta be good” Kyle chuckled. 

“It is. Shut up” she poked him and laughed. “She said to eat whatever you want but in moderation. And then make sure you exercise. How freaking simple and smart is that?”

“Hard to argue with it, I’ll give her that” he smiled and pulled his cute sister into a hug. “Thanks for telling me about her finding her passion at 37. That’s really cool. I’m going to start telling people that story.”

“Please do. She’s inspirational. And so are you. And I’m so proud of you Ky. You’re going to do great things, even more than you already have” she beamed up at him. “I just know it.”

//

Josie’s party went off on Saturday without a hitch. She was an adorable little girl who could be surprisingly shy around other people, not her family. Ali and Ashlyn invited her whole daycare class to the party, not wanting to leave anyone out. It was a busy weekend for high school graduations in the area so the party was smaller and filled with the usual suspects. Everyone from the four families was there, along with all of the grandparents except for the two Mikes. The Donaldsons were there as were George the builder and his wife. They got an invitation to every party the Kriegers ever hosted but his schedule made it tough to attend many. He made sure to hit at least one birthday party every summer and everyone was glad to see him. He loved to tease the couple and take credit for getting them together. 

“I’m just saying” he would grin and laugh. “If I had decided to use a different window...”

And Drew had begged them to let his best friend from school, Ethan, come to the party too. That had been a tough call because it was Josie’s party and she didn’t have any extra friends at Drew’s party. They liked Ethan, and, truthfully, felt sorry for he and his dad because Ethan’s mom had passed away a couple of years ago and that was just the worst thing any young parent could imagine. Well, except for losing a child. They decided to let Drew invite Ethan to the party and he and his dad were both happy to join in the fun.

“I’m not so good with girls” Sam, Ethan’s dad, apologized self-consciously as he handed a little pink gift bag with a frilly purple ribbon around the handle and a birthday card sticking out of the top of it to Ali that afternoon. “I tucked the gift receipt in the bottom of the bag in case it’s all wrong” he chuckled nervously.

“Oh, you’re so sweet Sam” Ali gave him a warm smile and put the gift bag on the dining room table with the other gifts. “I’m sure it’ll be great” she smiled again as she returned quickly to the mudroom where the handsome man stood with his hands awkwardly at his sides. “You’ve got the bag and the ribbon perfect already so I know the rest will be just wonderful” she laughed and patted his arm as they both walked out the mudroom door to the driveway.

When the Kriegers had any outdoor parties the driveway was always a main gathering spot. It was shadier than the backyard, depending on the time of day, but especially in the afternoon, and it was usually where the outdoor food table would get set up because of the good, sturdy footing. Any adult beverages were usually kept in the driveway area as well, with the cooler full of kid drinks right inside the fenced backyard. If they were grilling, they moved the grill to the driveway as well, always trying to avoid trouble with any kids in the backyard. In reality, they kept the children penned in the backyard fence and most of the grown-ups hung out in the driveway and talked and watched the mayhem unfold. There were always a few brave souls who ventured into the pen to keep peace among the kids, some of them even went in voluntarily. Ali had watched Ethan and Drew run out of the mudroom and through the gate into the backyard a few minutes ago and she walked Sam out to the driveway about to ask him what time he wanted to pick up his son when he spoke first.

“So, I can come get him anytime...don’t keep him any longer than you want to...” he said nervously and smiled before looking down at his feet.

“Oh, we love Ethan” Ali touched his arm again hoping to make him feel less guilty about leaving his son. She knew the feeling. It was nerve-wracking to walk away from somebody’s house and have to hope your 5-year old child behaved himself while you were gone. “Don’t worry. He’s always good whenever he’s been here” she smiled up at him.

“Oh thank God” he chuckled and looked relieved. “I’m always so afraid he’ll be a little terror and everybody will feel too sorry for us to tell me the truth.”

Ali was taken aback by his honesty and his casual reference to their situation.

“You don’t have to worry about that here” she joined him with a chuckle of her own. “We believe in straight talk here, which is really sort of ironic...” she tried to make a joke because now she was the one who was nervous.

There was another awkward pause as they looked at each other, both wishing to take some words back.

“Oh” he laughed, finally. “I get it” he nodded with a shy grin. “Because you’re not straight.”

Ali blushed and wished someone, anyone, would come and save her from this conversation. She liked Sam and she had always been able to talk easily with him at the other parties and school events she had socialized with him at. But he seemed nervous today and that had made her nervous.

“Why don’t you just come and get him whenever fits into your schedule for the day” she tried again. 

She could see Whitney and Ryan walking up the driveway with another pink gift bag and she felt relief wash over her.

“Ok...I...well...I don’t really have anything going on today” he admitted bashfully and looked embarrassed. “We were going to go fishing today...”

“And our late invitation messed up your plans” Ali figured out what the problem was. “I’m sorry Sam. We don’t usually have the other kids invite their friends to a birthday party, you know, unless it’s their own...”

“Oh” his eyebrows shot up and he panicked, thinking he should have turned down the invitation.

“No!” she realized her mistake as soon as the words left her lips. “We’re glad he’s here. Don’t think that.” She rolled her eyes. “This is ridiculous” she chuckled and shook her head. “Let me try again. This is the first time any of our kids has been old enough to ask us to have a friend come to one of their siblings’ parties” she explained quickly. “It had never occurred to us before, so that’s why we didn’t ask you until so late. I promise” she assured him with another smile.

“Oh, ok” he smiled too, obvious relief on his face as well. “Mystery solved.”

“Hey, Sam, right?” Ryan clapped him on the back and stuck out his hand to shake it as Whitney hugged Ali hello. They had met at Drew’s birthday party three weeks earlier and had a pretty intense conversation about baseball, both traitorous NY Yankees fans. “I’m glad you’re here.”

“Yeah, oh hi” Sam smiled at the taller man. “It’s nice to see you again...”

“Ryan” he supplied his own name and introduced his wife. “Don’t feel bad. I only had one new name to learn and you had about a hundred” Ryan laughed. “I’ll see you in there.”

Ryan and Whitney walked into the mudroom and Ali turned back to Sam.

“Yes, why don’t you just stay?” she smiled warmly at him. “I mean, if you want to. We’ve got lots of food, not awesome pizza from Machado’s like at Drew’s party” she flattered him, and his parents’ pizzeria.

She already knew he didn’t have any plans so he didn’t have an excuse not to stay. The thought of him going back to his parents’ house to spend the afternoon and evening alone made the brunette really sad and she genuinely hoped he would stay.

“Are you sure?” he asked. “I don’t want to intrude or invite myself...”

“Please, don’t be silly. You’re welcome to stay, but I’ve got to go check on the kitchen so...”

“Well ok” he smiled broadly. “I’ll stay, but only if you let me help. I know my way around a kitchen” he chuckled and followed the brunette back into the house.

//

Sunday afternoon Deb, Ali and Kyle talked about her trip to Italy. Deb’s cousin, Diana, had just emailed her a bunch of pictures she and her husband had taken and she was showing them to her children while her three youngest grandchildren napped upstairs. Ashlyn had taken Drew with her to drive Tammye and Carol to the airport for their flight back home to Florida.

It had been a busy morning highlighted by Dodge finally taking his very first steps. He had spent the previous afternoon and evening trying to follow little Penny Cross around Josie’s party. She had turned two years old in March and between she and James Dwyer, who was only four months older than Penny, Dodge constantly had someone he felt like he might have a chance to catch up to. He was a very fast crawler, using his strong arms and legs to propel himself across any floor much more quickly than anybody who didn’t live with him expected. Josie was only five months older than James but she walked much faster than both he and Penny. Probably because she was always trying to stay ahead of her younger brother Dodge. After a very frustrating day of getting so close to keeping up with a bigger kid like Penny or James, Dodge had gone to sleep that night without a smile, which was pretty rare. Ashlyn chalked it up to him just being exhausted and it made sense to both moms and the grandma brigade at the house too. 

As soon as he had finished his breakfast that morning Ali put him on the floor near the couch in the family room. There were enough people around that she didn’t feel like she needed to contain him in the gated front living room just yet. Kyle was sitting in one of the comfy chairs in front of the double-sided fireplace, petting Persey and quietly enjoying his morning coffee while he watched the breakfast chaos go on around him. Fred was lying under the nook table, waiting for delicious scraps to fall for him and Dodge looked from one dog to the other to try and decide his next destination. Fred was too close to the table and the highchair he had just been freed from, so the toddler focused on Persey, sitting next to Kyle and resting her head in his lap for pats. Normally Dodge would have closed the six-foot distance in no time, crawling quickly over and burying his face in Persey’s chest for a fairly gentle grab/hug. He really was getting better with gentle, especially when it came to animals. 

But Sunday morning, after spending so much energy the day before and failing to keep up with those walking kids, he reached up for the arm of the couch and pulled himself to his feet. That wasn’t unusual. He did that all the time and stood for a minute or two and then plopped back down on his bum because he wasn’t coordinated enough to get his legs to walk yet. He held onto the couch for a few seconds and positioned himself so he could face his goal while still holding on to the couch, almost reaching behind him with one arm. That’s how strong his legs were, he didn’t really need the couch for anything other than balance at that point. Nobody else had noticed yet, not even Kyle. Persey turned her head and watched him carefully, wanting to be ready to move if necessary. Both dogs knew how fast Dodge could move and made their escapes accordingly, when they needed to. When Persey didn’t put her head back down after a second or two, Kyle noticed and turned his own head to see what had caught her attention.

“Ummm...guys?” he said quietly but excitedly as he saw Dodge let go of the couch and balance himself on his own two feet, concentrating on the colorful area rug in front of him. The thirteen-month old was dressed in his pajamas, long green pants with thin, dark blue stripes across the legs horizontally and no feet, with a dark blue, long-sleeved shirt that had an elephant, a giraffe and a toucan sitting on the elephant’s back, with the words ‘Bedtime Safari’ and ‘park ranger’ above and below the animals. Kyle’s voice got more urgent. “Guys!” he half-yelled, wanting to get his sister’s attention but not wanting to distract his nephew from the task at hand.

“What does the diva need now?” Ashlyn looked up at her brother-in-law from her spot on the banquette seat of the nook. She was helping Lily eat her breakfast and talking with her mom and Carol who were also sitting at the nook table but with their backs to the family room. When she saw the excited look on Kyle’s face she followed his gaze to Dodge and sucked in a breath. “Holy shit” she said so quietly that her mother wasn’t sure she had heard her correctly. “Ali!” the keeper yelled to the kitchen where her wife had taken Dodge’s dirty tray, never taking her eyes off of Dodge. “Bring your phone, quick!”

It only took ten seconds for Tammye and Carol to turn around in their chairs and Ali and Deb to come in from the kitchen, Deb on the side of the fireplace by the nook table and Ali on the other side of the fireplace by the pantry, closer to Kyle’s chair.

“What’s going on?” she asked breathlessly and came to a complete halt next to Kyle’s chair, covering her mouth with her hand when she saw her son lift up one leg and tentatively move it forward about six inches. “Oh my God” Ali exhaled through a nose-crinkling grin. “Please tell me you’re recording this” she whispered to her brother, afraid to speak too loudly and somehow throw the boy off-balance.

Everybody in the room held their breath and watched in wonder as Dodge took his first, jerking, wobbly steps towards Persey. Even the kids still at the nook table were paying attention. Once he got his first foot down and had managed to lift up his back leg he lost his balance. Ali knelt down next to Persey, putting an arm around her to make sure she stayed and reaching her other arm out to encourage her boy to keep going.

“You can do it Dodge” she beamed at him and nodded her head. “Just take your time...”

But that was not Dodge’s style. At all. He regained his balance and gave his mommy the biggest grin of his entire life when he was still standing. 

“Watch what you’re doing Dodge” Ashlyn encouraged him from her seat, grin almost as big as her son’s. “Concentrate on your feet big boy.”

He took two more steps and then wiped out when he got to the hardwood floor. He landed on his bum and looked so disappointed that he might cry. But that only lasted a second before he grinned again when he heard the whole room cheering him and telling him what a great job he had done. Lily was clapping along with everyone else and Josie and Drew both smiled and laughed too. Ashlyn was pretty sure they were laughing because he fell though, but she didn’t care. Ali reached over and helped Dodge up before pulling him into a big hug. The little guy reached over and patted Persey, which was his whole goal when he started his big adventure, and then jumped up and down in his mommy’s arms.

“Do you want to try that again honey?” Ali asked him after kissing both of his big, grinning cheeks. “Let’s try again.”

The family spent the next half an hour watching Dodge get better and better at walking back and forth between Ali and Kyle. Boom - another milestone achieved, just like that. It was exciting and the fact that he had done it when so many of the people who loved him were there watching was a true blessing. 

“So you never answered the question mom” Kyle quirked his eyebrow at her. “Which did you like better, Rome or Florence?”

“I didn’t answer it because I don’t know” she sighed wistfully. “They were both so beautiful, but completely different. You just can’t compare the two” she gave her final opinion.

“Who’s in that picture?” Ali squinted at the laptop screen and expanded the picture with her fingers. “That’s Grandma, right?”

“Oh, Di found some old family photos and I asked her to send me copies” Deb smiled at the picture. “Yes, that’s my mom, Anna Maria, and her older sister – my aunt Josefina.”

“Hey, is that where you got Josephine from?” Kyle cocked his head as he looked at his sister.

“Kind of” Ali explained. “I just always loved that name. I don’t know if I heard you and Grandma talking about your aunt when I was little or what” the brunette nodded at her mother as she spoke, “but it wasn’t a conscious thing. I remember being really surprised when Grandma died and I saw her sister’s name in the obituary. I mean, I knew she had a sister but I don’t think I could have come up with her name if my life depended on it.”

“I always just assumed you liked the name because you had heard it from Aunt Jo” Debbie pursed her lips. “Isn’t it funny how the mind works?”

“Well we hardly ever saw them” Kyle chimed in. “All of those Scaglione relatives down there in Maryland and Virginia were kind of mysterious to us.”

They shared a few more stories about Scaglione memories from when Kyle and Ali were kids and then Deb got serious. She talked about how sick poor Aunt Jo got before she died and what a sad trip it had been when she went down to Maryland to say goodbye to her for the last time.

“Di has been telling me about her mom’s cancer and now her sister’s been diagnosed too” Deb’s eyes were sad and her face fell as she stopped on another picture of six little kids taken way back in the 60s. “That’s my cousin Maria, there” she pointed to one of the kids and identified her as Diana’s older sister. “She was so beautiful” Deb smiled softly. “She’s six years older than me and I always wanted to be like her.”

“She’s got cancer?” Ali asked and leaned a little closer to her mother as they all sat together on the couch in the family room.

“Yes, she just found out in March. She’s not doing very well at all. They gave her 3-6 months to live but Di says she’s really taken a turn for the worse in the last couple of weeks.”

“I’m sorry mom” Kyle put his arm around his mother, who was sitting between them with the laptop on her lap, and hugged her. “Is there anything we can do?”

“What kind of cancer is it?” Ali asked.

“No, thank you sweetheart. She’s in hospice care now and they’re just trying to keep her comfortable” Deb explained. “Mike and I are going to go visit next weekend. She’s got ovarian cancer and it was really advanced when they caught it.”

“How old is she? 70?” Kyle tried to do the math in his head.

“She’ll turn 70 later this year, well, she would have” Deb’s voice was sad and flat. “But the reason I wanted to tell you both about this is because when she found out she had ovarian cancer, Diana started asking all sorts of questions about when her mom, Aunt Jo, died.”

“What kind of cancer did she have?” Ali looked through a couple more pictures as she listened to her mom’s sad story.

“Well, that’s the thing. At the time Aunt Jo was diagnosed with stomach cancer and that’s what her death certificate even says. Di checked” Deb explained. “But ovarian cancer was, and still is, often misdiagnosed as stomach cancer...”

“Wait, are you saying we have a history of ovarian cancer in our family?” Ali’s eyes went wide and she sat up straight and locked eyes with her mom.

“Yes, I think we do” Deb replied solemnly.

“Well I don’t have ovaries but even I know that’s a big deal. It’s hereditary, right?” Kyle asked, his face suddenly serious. “Angelina Jolie had hers removed as a precaution because her mother died from ovarian cancer.”

“Di and I have both had the BRCA testing done and it came back negative, so that’s good” Deb continued. “Di’s making sure both her girls get tested, Maria’s daughter will too...and I want you to do it Alex” she squeezed her daughter’s hand. “Don’t be afraid, just get tested and then you’ll know.”

“Ok, I’ll talk to Patty about it” the brunette nodded slowly, her eyes still wide with shock and a little fear.

“Di and I were both negative so don’t be too worried” Deb tried to assure both of her nervous looking children. “Just better safe than sorry, right?”

It wasn’t until later that night that Ali got a chance to talk to Ashlyn about her mother’s family cancer story. 

“Why did your mom wait almost two full months to tell you about it?” the keeper was frustrated and couldn’t hide it as she paced back and forth at the foot of their bed. “She should have told you right away...”

“She and Diana wanted to get their test results back first to sort of get a head start on everything before they gave us all heart attacks” the brunette explained and reached her hand out for her agitated wife from her side of the bed. “The results take a few weeks, at least. Come here babe.”

Ashlyn made two more passes, brow furrowed and one hand nervously hanging onto the back of her own neck before she finally saw her wife’s outstretched hand. She sighed heavily and her shoulders slumped as she crawled up the bed and into Ali’s waiting arms.

“Getting upset about it now isn’t going to do anything but make you upset honey” the brunette soothed as she held her wife against her chest, rubbing her back and kissing the top of her head. “I’ll go see Patty this week and talk to her about it. Then I’ll take the test and we’ll go from there.”

“Gram always said she was glad she had breast cancer and not ovarian cancer” Ashlyn’s voice was quiet and emotional as she clung to Ali, wrapping both arms around her waist as she lay on top of her with her head on Ali’s chest and her long legs stretched out behind her and in between Ali’s legs.

“Why?”

“She said the ovarian cancer was so hard to detect” Ashlyn squeezed her wife. “At least with the breast cancer you could usually find it easier so you could treat it.”

“That sure does make a difference” Ali replied quietly.

They were both quiet for a few minutes, deep in their own thoughts. They were all ready for bed, they just had to get under the covers and go to sleep, but neither of them made any move to do that just yet. 

“That’s what happened to Ethan’s mom” Ashlyn finally said, so softly Ali could barely hear her.

“What honey?” she asked as she played with the short hair at the back of her keeper’s neck.

“Ethan’s mom” Ashlyn repeated. “She died from cancer two years ago. She was 40 years old.”

And there it was. Getting the new family history from Deb had been a little unsettling, for sure. But Ali couldn’t figure out why her keeper was letting it bother her so much. Now it made sense. Ali was turning 40 years old next month and all Ashlyn could focus on was that Drew’s best friend’s mom died at 40 from cancer.

“Who told you that?”

“Julie Donaldson. She and her sister grew up with Sam and Maggie” the keeper shared. “She knows the whole story.”

It was news to Ali. Everybody knew that Ethan’s mom, Maggie, had died two years ago and that Sam had tried to stay in Chicago and raise Ethan there by himself. After a miserable year of trying and failing, he moved back to Gloucester with his boy so his parents could help out. But that was all the details that were commonly available.

“Well, what’s the whole story?” the brunette asked.

“Sam and Maggie went to high school together, here in Gloucester, but they never dated or anything. They didn’t really hang out together much at all actually.” Ashlyn stayed right where she was and let her wife play with her hair while she told the story and held her tight. “His parents owned the pizzeria and he wanted to be a chef so he went to Johnson & Wales culinary institute down in Rhode Island for four years after graduating high school. He did really well and moved to New York City and worked in a bunch of different restaurants for six more years. His dad had a heart attack and wasn’t able to work for, like, six months while he recovered. Sam’s mom almost lost the pizzeria because she couldn’t run the business and take care of her husband at the same time. Their other son hadn’t turned out so well and was, and still is I think, in prison. So Sam left NYC and moved home to Gloucester to help his mom and dad keep the business and get his dad’s heart healed up.”

“Wow, I had no idea...” Ali’s mind was racing, going back over all of the conversations she had had about food with Sam in the past year since they had moved back to Gloucester, again. 

“Sometime around when he first left NYC, he and Maggie reconnected in Gloucester. She was home for...somebody’s funeral” the keeper paused, trying to remember the details from Julie’s story. “I think her grandmother but I’m honestly not sure” she admitted and moved on. “Anyway, they bumped into each other and eventually started dating. Maggie was doing very well as an investment banker in Boston and, after a year, Sam proposed and they got married. They were both 30 years old by then. Sam’s dad recovered from his heart attack and was able to get back to work and everything was great. Maggie got an incredible job offer in Chicago and they moved there and started their life together. Sam got a great job as the sous chef in a restaurant that was just opening up and they were really happy. Six years later Maggie got pregnant with Ethan and gave birth when she was 37 years old. They had two years together before Maggie got a really aggressive form of breast cancer. She fought it for six months and died when she was 40 and Ethan was 3 years old.” Ashlyn was quiet for a minute or two, letting it all sink in. “Sam tried to take care of Ethan on his own and raise him in Chicago like he and Maggie had planned, but he couldn’t make it work. After a year they moved back here to Gloucester. And Ethan started preschool with Drew in September last year. Now Sam works for his parents at the pizzeria and they help him with Ethan.”

“God, that’s so sad” Ali sniffled as she took in the whole story. “He made his dream come true and found his wife and then even had a baby before everything fell apart. I swear I don’t know how we got so lucky Ash.” The brunette pulled her wife up and sat herself up against the headboard more so Ashlyn could sit on her lap, straddling her. They were face to face and practically breathing in the same air. “I love you so much honey. And I know you’re scared. I’m a little nervous too, I won’t lie to you” Ali cupped her wife’s face with both hands as she spoke. “But we’ll get it checked out. We don’t have to wait for it to find me. We’re looking for it so it can’t sneak up on us. We have the power.”

It was hard not to feel comforted by Ali’s strong, brave words and Ashlyn, for the first time since they started talking about it that evening, felt optimistic about Ali’s situation.

“I never thought about it like that” she wrapped her arms around Ali’s back and held their two bodies together, tightly. ‘We have the power this time...I really love the way that sounds.”

“That’s right babe. I promise I’ll do everything I can to make sure we always stay ahead of this thing. If it even turns out to be anything. I swear it honey.”

They hugged for a long time and Ali was relieved to feel her wife’s body start to relax a bit. Eventually their lips found each other and they reassured one another with some slow, romantic kisses that had less to do with sex and more to do with love and caretaking and trust.

“I can’t believe you didn’t know any of Sam’s story” Ashlyn chuckled as she leaned back and held Ali’s hands in hers between them.

“Why does that surprise you? I don’t really know him very well” the brunette leaned forward and gave her wife another sweet kiss.

“I don’t know, it just seems like you two are friendly and you always seem to end up working school events together and stuff like that” she shrugged. “I just figured some part of the story would have made it from him to you by now.”

“I didn’t even know he was a chef” Ali chuckled. “He always offered to help me in the kitchen whether it was here for one of the kids’ parties or at school for one of their events. Yesterday was the first time he ever even referenced his wife dying.”

“That must have been fun” Ashlyn’s face was creased with concern. “I’m glad I wasn’t standing right there for that one” she giggled and then felt guilty about it.

“He was pretty calm and straightforward about it actually” Ali remembered the brief mention in conversation. “He was afraid people wouldn’t tell him Ethan was misbehaving because they felt sorry for the two of them.”

“Wow. He’s probably right too” the blonde admitted. “I mean, I’m a little extra patient with Ethan for that exact same reason.”

“I think we all are” Ali agreed thoughtfully. “That’s going to be tough to get right sometimes.”

“What did you tell him?”

“Oh God” she rolled her eyes and blushed which made Ashlyn giggle. “I told him he didn’t have to worry about that with us because we were straight shooters...”

“No, not your ‘straight shooters’ joke” Ashlyn groaned. “Honey, you didn’t?”

“I did” she laughed as her wife caressed her arms sympathetically. “And then I had to explain it to him because he didn’t get it right away.”

“Oh Jesus!” Ashlyn laughed out loud and threw her head back. “I don’t know how I ever fell for you, you smooth talker you...”

Ali pushed her laughing wife over sideways and climbed on top of her, playfully holding her wrists with one hand and tickling her with the other.

“Hey, I’m a total catch and you know it” she giggled along with her keeper as she kept tickling her. “Maybe I can’t always get my mouth to say what I want it to, but it has other skills...” she teased and smirked at her squirming wife beneath her.

“That it does” Ashlyn gasped out between tickles. “That it definitely does” she beamed up at Ali who had finally stopped torturing her. They stared at each other for a minute while Ashlyn’s breathing came back to normal, dark cinnamon eyes meeting tawny hazel ones as they smiled. “Kiss me, smooth talker.”


	12. Olympics - Part 1

The opening ceremony for the 2024 Summer Olympics was Sunday, July 21st. Los Angeles was hosting and all of Southern California was decked out in its finest for the whole world to see. There were so many universities and venues and hotels that were already in place that the organizers hadn’t really had to build more than a few specific structures to pull the Games off. It was going to be three weeks of the finest, purest sports competitions the world had ever seen and it was going to happen right here in the USA. The closing ceremony would be Friday night August 9th. Ashlyn had been hired by NBC Sports to cover the USWNT again and she was very excited to be a part of it. The Kriegers had been planning their Olympic adventure for almost a year. Right after the Women’s World Cup last year NBC Sports had reached out to the keeper and asked her to sign on for the 2024 Olympics. It had been an easy decision for the family to make and both Ali and Ashlyn were happy to discover that they had the same thing in mind for how to make it happen. They would rent a house near LA for a month and just pack everybody up and relocate temporarily. They both wanted Drew and Josie to be able to experience some of the Olympics, not knowing when such an incredible event would be held in their own country again. A lot of the expense for the trip would be paid by either NBC Sports or the Knight-Harris Company. It was definitely a business trip for the blonde, and for Ali as her agent. 

As they had done in October last year, for the NWSL Championship Week and game, the Kriegers found a house near the beach that was big enough for an army of people. Ashlyn had asked Whitney’s mom to check out a few places in person to make sure they were everything advertised before making any commitments. Unlike last October’s week-long visit, this year’s stay was longer and would encompass four times as many people and they had to have the right house for it if their plan was going to work. Luckily, there were lots of insanely big beach houses in Southern California so it wasn’t a problem. As soon as Ashlyn and Ali had formulized the plan back in September of last year they asked the other four families to join them. Instead of going to NH or Maine for their big week of four family fun this August, they wanted the Crosses and Flanagans and Dwyers to come to LA for the Olympics with them! They knew it was a tall order but it was also a pretty spectacular opportunity that wasn’t going to come along every day. The proposition was that the Kriegers would rent a big enough house to accommodate everybody and all the Dwyers and Crosses would have to do was to pay for the airfare to get to LA. They would all share food costs and things like that as they usually did.

Sydney said yes before she even talked to Dom about it. She wasn’t going to have her boys miss a chance to go to the Olympics if she could do anything to help it. She was off for the summer, until the last week of August anyway, so she and her mom were in for all three weeks. Dom would come for a week’s vacation and then, maybe, again if he could get more time off. It didn’t take too long for Niki and Molly to agree as well. Niki was in the same situation as Sydney, she had her summers off, and she was eager to join the fun. Molly needed a couple of months to convince her company that she could work remotely from LA just as easily as she could from Arlington, Massachusetts, but once she promised to keep working on east coast time it was approved. Whitney had been in on it from the beginning, planning on using the trip for actual business at the same time, just as she had done last October. She was always looking to interview and meet hungry young law students who might be a good fit for Knight-Harris and there were thousands of them in the LA area. The lawyer would be there for the duration and Ryan would join them for the middle week, the Cannon’s off-week at the end of July.

The only wrinkle in the plan was that Ashlyn would have to work on-air every three days for the USWNT games, and then she’d have to watch as many of the other games as possible and offer opinions on most of those as well. She had hours of research and homework to do before she even got to LA as well. Ali lined up more help from their actual families for the three weeks so her keeper wouldn’t feel pressured to be two places at once. Deb and Mike Christopher were already in Manchester, MA for the summer so they flew out with the young Krieger family and stayed at the rented beach house for the first week. Kyle and Nathan flew out for the second week, both taking vacation and planning and preparing for the trip for months in advance. And Tammye and Carol flew out for the third week, extending their stay and planning another week of travel up the West Coast as well. Having that help was the only way Ali could make the trip work for her family. She knew the other grown-ups from the four families would help her when Ashlyn wasn’t around, but she wanted them to be able to enjoy their time at the Olympics too. She felt guilty for encroaching on the ‘four family’ vacation week by having grandparents and uncles there but Ashlyn told her not to worry about it.

“Nobody cares honey” the keeper told her one afternoon towards the end of June. Ali was getting more nervous about it as the trip fast approached. “Seriously” she paused while unpacking the groceries her wife had just brought in to the kitchen, “who is it that you think is going to be upset by having your mom and Mike there the first week?”

“I don’t know Ashlyn, that’s exactly why I’m worried about it” Ali’s voice was anxious and slightly raised and she was short with the blonde. She grabbed a couple of boxes of pasta, an industrial size box of Goldfish, some organic gummies, and two boxes of crackers off of the counter and carried them into the pantry. “How would you feel if Molly’s mom and dad came to the lake house with all of us next summer?” she asked over her shoulder as she went.

“But it’s not the same Al, that’s what I’m trying to say” the keeper tried again as she continued to unpack groceries and set them on the counter.

“How is it not the same?” Ali dropped her hand down dramatically on the counter by the coffee maker, having just stepped back out of the pantry for more groceries. 

The louder than usual noise got the attention of both dogs and Dodge who came toddling in on his new walking legs to check out the commotion. 

“Mama” he said as he made his way over to Ali’s legs and gave them a hug. He hadn’t mastered ‘mommy’ yet and still used ‘mama’ interchangeably.

“Hi baby boy” Ali sighed, smiled and scooped him up to give him a big hug and a kiss. “How was the park? Did you have fun with your sisters?”

“Park!” he clapped his hands and jerked his head forward in a fast, excited motion. 

Ali moved her own head out of the way just in time, having learned the hard way that his headbutts hurt like hell. He wasn’t trying to hurt anybody, he just got excited and that was one of the ways he communicated it. He wasn’t even really trying to headbutt you. He just had to move around and his head was one of his go-to choices.

“Let mama and I finish in here and then we’ll go play before dinner ok?”

“Yummmm” he patted his belly and kicked his feet as Ali put him back down on the floor.

“Here Dodger” Ashlyn held her hand out with two grapes in her palm. “Eat them one at a time...chew them up good” she said after the boy as he wobbled back out to the front living room where his sisters were watching a show. “It’s not the same because the usual vacation, like the lake house, is for one week only and we’re all there and I’m not working and only there part time. It would be weird for one of us to bring a grandma on one of our regular vacations – you’re right. But this isn’t that.”

“I know Syd doesn’t care and Whit won’t care...” the brunette picked up a big box of diapers and carried it over to the backstairs, leaving it at the foot of them until her next trip up.

“Sydney better not care because she’s bringing her mom for when Dom’s not there” Ashlyn laughed and carried a bunch of fruit over to the sink so she could wash it later. “I’m telling you for a fact that Niki and Molly don’t care.”

“For a fact” Ali turned quickly and squinted at her wife. “What did Niki say? And more importantly, what did you say to Niki?”

“I just told her that you were worried that they would be upset that we had to bring help...”

“Ash-lyn” she whined. “If I had wanted them to know I was worried about it I would have just talked to Molly myself.”

“Well maybe you should have” Ashlyn tossed the 12-pack of toilet paper rolls to her wife across the kitchen and quirked her eyebrow at her.

“Ughh” Ali groaned angrily as she put the toilet paper on top of the box of diapers by the backstairs.

“Don’t you want to know what she said?” the keeper asked with another challenging look as she tossed a big package of baby wipe refills to the brunette, followed closely by another.

“You know I do” Ali returned her own frustrated look. “I already asked you that” she snapped, not a full-on snap, just a borderline snap, adding the wipes to the pile by the backstairs.

“She said she didn’t know how else you could do it with me having to work and there being four little Kriegers to wrangle” Ashlyn let the box of toothpaste and the box of q-tips and the box of tiny dixie cups fly one after the other and then stopped to look at the package in her hands, frowning. “What is this?” she turned it over and looked at the back for more information. “I don’t think this looks like something we should give Dodge” she held up the package with two small balls in it for her wife to see. “They’re too heavy...”

“They’re for the dogs, Ash” Ali chuckled as she stood up from adding the other bathroom items to the pile she was building. “I would hope you wouldn’t give ‘venison flavored treat balls’ to our children” she laughed as she watched her keeper blush and mutter something under her breath.

“Well...” Ashlyn tried to come up with a smart comeback but couldn’t so she stood there with a funny look on her face until she couldn’t help but join her wife’s laughter. 

They both laughed for a good couple of minutes, holding their stomachs and slapping their thighs as it built and grew louder and deeper. Ashlyn threw the dog toy package at her wife and Ali threw it right back to her.

“First you don’t know what it is and now you don’t know where it goes?!” she said through laughter. “Come on All-star, snap out of it. We’ve gotta get this all put away and get dinner ready and I haven’t even changed yet.”

Ashlyn carried the other box of diapers over to where Ali was and put it down next to the pile as they both got their laughter under control. She stood up and pulled the brunette in for a hug, kissing the side of her head as she felt Ali wrap her arms around her waist and squeeze her back. They stayed in the hug for a couple of minutes as they finished talking.

“Nobody cares that we’re bringing reinforcements honey. I promise you.” The keeper rubbed Ali’s back and pressed another kiss into the side of her head. “And I know you don’t see it this way, but everybody else does...they’re grateful for the free house to stay in. We’ve more than done our share for this vacation” Ashlyn patted her wife’s butt a couple of times. “If putting up with Kyle for a week is what they have to do to get a free beach house for three weeks then that’s more than fair” she leaned back to look at her wife’s pretty face and smiled when she saw a small smile there too. “Ok?”

“Ok” Ali sighed and leaned up to give her a sweet kiss. “I just want everybody to be comfortable” she added after another quick peck.

“I know. We all know you’re just trying to make everybody happy. It’s why we love you so much. Now just let it go baby.”

It wasn’t always easy and there were more than a few stressful moments during the three weeks, but everybody had way more fun and the incredible Olympic experience more than made up for any upset or hurt feelings. The grown-ups were fine, it was the kids who always seemed to make each other cry that vacation. It was a rotating schedule of who cried next. Sometimes it was legitimate tears from an injury or an accident. Sometimes it was unavoidable cries from being overtired or hungry or sun burned. The only crying that really bothered anybody was the purposeful tears that had been caused in anger or hurtfulness. Thankfully those were the rarest of all three kinds, but it still happened at least once a day. There were eleven kids in the group now, including 12-1/2 year old Meg who joined them for the last week of the trip. After Meg, Noah was 8-1/2 and the youngest, Maddox, was 5 months old. The kids had broken into their own little groups, naturally and with the parents blessing. Sometimes there was fighting within a group but most often it was fighting between two of the groups that caused the angry tears. Noah and Cash were the oldest, not including Meg, and they formed their own duo. Drew and Evan were next and this was the troublesome pair. They weren’t quite old enough to keep up with Noah and Cash but they really really wanted to. Truthfully, Drew probably could have but then that would have left Evan on the outs. And even he was too big for the next group – Josie, James and Penny. This was the group that was the most fun to watch. Josie was the natural leader both because of her personality and because she was the oldest of the three. She was used to bossing around the babies at home so she just kept right on going with the two ‘older’ babies. Penny was pretty easy going so she didn’t mind following Josie’s lead, but every once in a while, she wanted to do her own thing and that always led to a fight with the feisty redhead. James was his father’s son, for sure. He just went along with whatever the girls wanted to do, unless it involved some sort of discomfort for himself. He always had a smile on his face and he always seemed to be enjoying himself. Sometimes, the twins even got to participate in the little kids group and it was a really entertaining show. 

Most of the trouble came when Drew and Evan tried to join the bigger boys. Noah and Cash weren’t mean, but they were older and just not interested in playing with anybody who couldn’t keep up with them. They didn’t always express that to Drew and Evan in polite terms. And then, poor Drew and Evan would sometimes be bored enough to join the little kids and that never went well either. Those two boys were always getting turned away from one group or another. Finally, after some advice from Niki and Ali on a few separate occasions, they decided to figure out their own fun things to do together. In typical 5 and 4-year old fashion, the idea had just not occurred to them before.

The USWNT played their first game on Wednesday, July 24th and beat Sweden 2-1. It had been a good, tough game and the US looked nervous early on but then settled down and played a pretty good second half of soccer to get the victory. On Saturday, July 27th they played their next game in the Group stage against an up and coming New Zealand squad. Their federation hadn’t been getting the team what they needed to thrive for many years but the players had managed to get the attention of the rest of the world with a players’ strike back before the WWC last year. This year with new funds and better facilities it was easy to see the improvement the team had made on the pitch. The 4-0 scoreline didn’t show it, but New Zealand had played with heart and fire and the US team knew they would be a force to be reckoned with in the near future. The third and final game of the Group stage was on Tuesday, July 30th and the US defeated South Africa 3-1. The South African team had gone through the same thing with their federation that the New Zealanders had and were steadily improving. There hadn’t been anything truly challenging about the Group stage games for the US and that made everybody who knew anything about soccer nervous. It was the easiest Group and some analysts were questioning whether or not the US team would be ready to face the tough challenge that China would present them in the first game of the elimination rounds, the Quarterfinals.

“I don’t know why everybody has to keep hyping this story so much” Ashlyn shrugged her shoulders from the studio desk where soccer experts were all talking about how the USWNT hadn’t been tested yet. “You’re right, they haven’t really been tested yet, aside from some early, opening-game jitters against Sweden – which they recovered from nicely, by the way.”

“Are you saying you’re not worried about the China match?” Rebecca Lowe replied from her seat at the desk and looked from Ashlyn over to Heather O’Reilly and Tim Howard. 

The network had brought back the same team from the 2020 Tokyo Olympics because they had been so popular. They added local LA soccer stars Mia Hamm and Alex Morgan to call the games with Arlo White to complete the coverage team. As always, there were plenty of other soccer opinions, via satellite feed from different places, that kept things lively and entertaining. Most of Ashlyn’s frustration had been with those folks, as usual.

“Of course I’m worried about the China match” the keeper responded diplomatically and gave Rebecca a sincere smile. “They’re a very talented team who’s playing extremely well right now. I’d be worried about facing them regardless of the Group the US just won. But here’s the thing that I find frustrating” she leaned forward and everybody could tell she felt strongly about whatever she was about to say next. “We’re criticizing the #1 ranked team in the world, the USWNT, who just won their group with three straight victories, because their competition wasn’t tough enough.” She paused for effect. “That’s what we’re doing and I think it’s wrong. Listen, we all know this” she nodded to the other two former players at the desk with her, “but it’s important to say it now. You can only beat the team in front of you. That’s all you can do. And guess what?” she smiled. “The USWNT beat all three of the teams that were put in front of them. Why can’t we celebrate that for a minute before jumping to the gloom and doom of a possible outcome of a game that hasn’t been played yet? Why do we do that? I’m not saying the China game will be easy. At all. And I’m not saying we shouldn’t talk about what the team needs to do to play well and beat China. But I’d really like to start doing that without tearing them down in the process. What’s the point of that? It’s not helpful. It doesn’t help the team. It doesn’t help the viewers or the fans. It doesn’t help us. I just don’t get it. But I’ll get off my soapbox now. I’m sorry everybody” she apologized directly to the camera.

Ashlyn’s comments got a lot of notice, as they always seemed to. But the response was by far and away positive. Tim Howard and Heather O’Reilly had agreed with her on the air, once they got a chance to talk. And the soccer experts who had been so negative about the team actually seemed to backtrack or at least tone it down a little. Now all Ashlyn needed was for the US to win their game against China or she’d look like a real idiot. If the US lost then all of the negative pundits would feel vindicated. 

The USWNT hadn’t changed very much from the year before when they won the Women’s World Cup. They were also the defending Olympic champions, having won Gold back in 2020 in Toyko. They were expected to win Gold again here this year but a lot of people were cautious because no team had ever won both the WWC and then the Olympics in consecutive years. Could the USWNT finally be the team to do it? Co-captains Morgan Brian and Sammy Mewis sure hoped so. Third year head coach Laura Harvey had put together a great team a year ago with a good mix of youth and experience and she saw no reason to blow it all up before contending for the Olympic gold medal. She had to trim five players from the roster to meet the 18-player limit for the Olympics and it hadn’t been easy. Three veterans who had made the WWC team last year didn’t make the cut this year and they were all leaders and fan favorites. Christen Press, Kelley O’Hara and Casey Short were 36, 36 and 34 years old respectively, and were left off the Olympic team. The old vets on the Olympic squad were Julie Ertz, Crystal Dunn and Sammy Mewis who were all 32 years old. Morgan Brian, Abby Smith and Lynn Williams were right behind them at 31 years old. The twelve other players included Rose Lavelle, Andi Sullivan, Mallory Pugh, Jane Campbell and Jessie Scarpa who were all in their mid to late 20’s and had all made the WWC team. Ashley Sanchez, Brooke Bingham, Jojo Harber, Becca Hamilton, Karina Rodriguez, Madison Haley and Frankie Tagliaferri were all under 25 years old and completed the Olympic squad. They all had WWC experience and coach Harvey was expecting the team to continue performing at the high level they had been playing at since their big WWC win in Australia last year.

And as always, the players got wind of Ashlyn’s comments and thanked her for her words. There were public tweets and Facebook posts from players praising her opinion. And there were private text messages and phone calls thanking her for always having their backs. Coach Harvey called her directly to let her know how much she appreciated her being the voice of reason in a chorus of rabid alarmists.

Ali’s 40th birthday was sandwiched between the New Zealand and South Africa Group games. Sunday, July 28th there was an afternoon birthday party that Deb and Mike Christopher helped with before flying home to Miami later that night. Kyle and Nathan were also there, having just arrived for their week two help shift. That evening Ashlyn took her wife out to a nice, romantic dinner at a beachside restaurant. They walked along the ocean after their delicious meal, holding hands and bumping shoulders as they went. Ali wore one of her simple but beautiful sleeveless sundresses, this one white with pale yellow flowers covering it. Ashlyn wore a pair of linen pants with a tight-fitting, light blue, ¾ sleeve shirt. They were dressy casual for the beach, their jewelry and make-up cleaning up their look just right. They passed another beachside restaurant with an outdoor patio that had lights strung all across the wooden timber gazebo roof above it. There was music playing and a handful of couples were dancing in the sweet, soft evening breeze. Ali tugged her wife up towards the patio with a beguiling smile.

“Pleeeaaase will you dance with me?” she asked as sweetly as she could.

“I’d love to honey” Ashlyn smiled back at her and dropped their shoes at the corner of the patio along with the messenger back she was carrying.

They had a quick drink and then spent the next hour dancing. They held each other close and talked and laughed while they moved with the romantic music. After about forty-five minutes the sun started to go down and the whole beach started to glow with oranges and reds and pinks. It wasn’t part of Ashlyn’s plan, but she had learned over the years to worry less about that and just enjoy what came their way. The truth was, as long as she had Ali by her side it didn’t really matter where they went or what they did – she would enjoy the time regardless. After another drink and some more dancing they finally collected their things and continued their walk down the beach.

“So when do I get to see what’s in the bag?” Ali quirked her eyebrow as they walked arm-in-arm through the cooling sand.

“Well, my original plan was to walk to the pier and give you your presents just before we watched the sun go down...”

“Oh babe, I’m sorry” Ali’s face fell. “I didn’t mean to mess everything up.”

“Nothing’s messed up” Ashlyn turned her head and kissed her wife’s cheek as they kept walking. “Holding you in my arms while we danced and saw one of the most beautiful sunsets I’ve ever witnessed was a much better plan. I wish I had thought of it myself” she chuckled.

“You weren’t supposed to get me any presents Ash” the brunette chastised her wife softly as she squeezed her waist. “My present is going down to Rhode Island with the girls next month. That’s all I want or need honey.”

“I know” the keeper smiled shyly. “But it’s your birthday sweetheart. It’s my favorite day of the whole year and I couldn’t let it go by without presents. But I tried to honor our deal, so I didn’t buy you anything. So don’t get too excited” she chuckled again.

How much did the brunette love her wife? Their evening had been absolutely perfect. Perfect weather. Perfect dinner. Perfect walk on the beach. Lucky and perfect dancing and gorgeous sunset. Perfect, romantic, sweet wife. The only thing missing was the perfect, sexy dessert that probably wasn’t going to happen for them in their beach house full of people. 

“So where to now?”

“It’s up to you, birthday girl” the keeper pulled Ali in closer against her side, her arm up around the brunette’s shoulders. “We can go back to the house and I can show you what’s in the bag or we can stop and get ice cream first” she couldn’t help but smile as she saw Ali’s face light up. “Totally up to you, of course, but I’d love some ice cream.”

“I love you so much Ashlyn” the brunette grinned her nose-crinkling grin. “Ice cream please.”

It was almost 11pm by the time they made it back to the beach house and crept into their bedroom. When they finally got into bed Ashlyn made her wife close her eyes and then placed a leather sketch album engraved with the letter ‘A’ just like the one she had given to her for her 35th birthday on her lap. Ali looked confused when she recognized the beautiful book that housed so many of the sketches that her keeper had drawn of her over the years. It had originally come with twelve sketches already included but Ashlyn had added two or three a year since then and filled it to the 24-page limit. Most of the additions were sketches of Ali with baby Josie and a couple of the two children together. 

“I love this babe, you know I do, but why did you bring it all the way out here?”

“It’s a new one” she replied softly, getting into bed next to her wife and lifting up the heavy cover so she could see the parchment style page Ashlyn had written on.

“Oh Ashlyn, how did you find time to sketch the babies? You’re too much” she leaned over and kissed her wife’s soft cheek. “Thank you so much honey.”

The inscription on that first page read:

‘For Ali – it’s been five years since I gave you the first album and the time has flown by. Happy 40th my love. Your birthday is still my favorite day of the year and you keep getting more and more beautiful with each one. There’s no way my sketches could ever fully capture all your beauty, but I’ll keep trying. Love always, Ashlyn’

There were eight sketches in this album, and Ali was in every one. There were two of her with baby Lily, one where she was in one of her business suits holding the baby girl up in the air. She had just come home from work and was standing in the front living room after scooping the baby up off the couch to greet her. The other was Ali reading to the infant girl, Lily sitting on her lap in the gliding chair in the nursery. There were two of her with baby Dodge, the first was of the two asleep. Dodge sleeping on Ali’s stomach in their big bed, with the brunette propped up against the headboard with her hand protectively across his little back. The second was of the two of them at the beach, Ali sitting in the surf with her baby boy between her legs, gazing down at him as he splashed in the sea. The other four were all of the brunette in different poses, none of them staged. Ashlyn had caught her napping on the couch in the family room with Persey asleep on the floor next to her. Another was of her sitting at the dressing table in the master bedroom. She was in just a bra and panties, leaning forward and applying her make-up. It could have been from any morning getting ready for work, or for an evening out. The most striking sketch of the new eight was an extreme close-up of Ali’s face in mid-laugh. Ashlyn had attempted to capture her favorite nose-crinkling laugh and she had done a remarkable job. Every detail, every line, every smile wrinkle was there. It was gorgeous. But the keeper’s favorite from this batch was of Ali, naked, shaving her legs while she sat on the lip of the tub. All of her beautiful curves and plenty of her muscles were visible. Neither one of them worked out as much as they used to simply because it was hard to make the time. But they both tried hard to stay in great shape and eat right, both for themselves and their wife.

“You don’t have to say anything” Ashlyn offered softly when her wife slowly closed the sketch album. “I know you feel self-conscious when I give you these sketches and that’s not my intent...”

“I know Ash” Ali leaned over and kissed her wife’s lips softly, putting her hand behind her neck and rubbing lightly with her thumb. “You’re so talented and I’m always so flattered when you do these” she placed her other hand on the leather album and spread her fingers out reverently. “I guess I just wish you’d go and sketch something better, you know? And I’m not fishing for compliments and I don’t want you to tell me how pretty I am” she added quickly. “I mean it for real. You could have your own art show honey. That’s how good you are.”

“Oh I don’t know about that” Ashlyn looked down bashfully and then put her hand on top of Ali’s on the album. “But I do know that these make me happy. I love sketching you and I could do it every single day” she smiled warmly at her wife who was blushing slightly. “And just like I told you when I gave you the first album, I wish you could see yourself the way the rest of us do. You’d never doubt yourself ever again baby. Happy Birthday” she smiled again and then met Ali’s lips with one of the most romantic kisses they had ever shared.

“I love you Ashlyn” the brunette murmured against her keeper’s lips, eyes still closed as she tried to extend the romantic moment as long as possible.

“Do you want your other present?” Ashlyn grinned and kissed her lips again quickly.

“There’s more?”

“Well, this is just sort of something silly that I thought you might like. It’s ok if you don’t...”

“Stop doing that” Ali shook her head and gave her girl a stern look. “You always do that and it’s not right. When have I ever not loved a gift you’ve given me?”

“The thong underwear...you definitely did not love those, even though there were some really pretty colors...”

“Ok, so one time” she rolled her eyes and chuckled. “And to be fair, you know I don’t like thongs. I only wear one on certain occasions to get a very specific result...”

“Yeah, me, at your service” Ashlyn giggled and kissed her again.

“My point is” Ali pulled back after briefly kissing her wife and put her finger on Ashlyn’s lips, “I love your gifts, no matter how little they cost or where they came from, so quit apologizing for them before I even open them up. You’ve done that for as long as I’ve know you Ash. You’ve got” she paused to do the math in her head, “wow, ten years of success giving me wonderful presents. That’s an amazing track record. I can’t believe the one thing you’re not confident about is your gift-giving prowess” she chuckled. “Newsflash – you’re really good at it!”

“Like I said, it’s not much, but I hope you like it” Ashlyn handed her a box, covered in flowered wrapping paper with a big, fuchsia bow on the top. It was three inches square and three inches deep and it rattled just a tiny bit when Ali shook it. “Hey, no cheating” the keeper playfully scolded.

Ali took her time unwrapping it, frustrated by all the times the kids just ripped their gifts apart after their moms had spent a lot of time making them look nice and wrapping them just so, and smiled excitedly when she lifted the lid off to reveal another box inside.

“Aww, elephants” she noted happily as she lifted the decorative tin out of the box. It was brass colored but completely covered in colors and images on all four sides as well as the lid. It looked almost like an old-fashioned spice tin from India or somewhere in the Orient. There was a different elephant on each surface and the whole thing smelled just a little bit like a fragrant tea. She shook the tin with a mischievous look. “What’s inside, I wonder...”

“You’re so bad. Just open it” the keeper shook her head and chuckled.

The brunette lifted the lid and let it fall open on its hinge. The tin was full of strips of paper, that seemed to be folded. Some of the strips were plain white, some were different colors, light blue, pink, pale green, and some were a faded yellow parchment style of paper. It sort of looked like easter egg grass the way it was all loosely packed into the tin.

“What’s all this?” Ali asked with an excited smile as she glanced up at her grinning wife.

“Pick one up and look at it” she suggested with a pleased smile. The blonde loved when Ali looked so intrigued and captivated.

Ali let her fingers work into the nest of papers and carefully pulled one out. She turned it around and unfolded it to reveal words printed in her wife’s neat but girlier than expected handwriting.

‘You always put the cap back on the toothpaste.’

“Try another one” Ashlyn urged after leaning forward and peeking at the pale green strip of paper in Ali’s hand.

‘You love fiercely and defend the ones you love ferociously.’

“Ashlyn...”

“Yeah, that’s a good one” she smiled bashfully.

‘You keep us all organized.’

Ali continued opening the strips of paper and reading out loud what her keeper had written.

‘You love Disney movies as much as you love Hitchcock films.’

‘Your sexy ass.’

“What is this babe?” the brunette asked with a cute tilt of her head.

“Keep going and see if you can figure it out” Ashlyn kissed her lips again. “I know you love a mystery.”

Ali kept going, reading several more strips.

‘You are an amazing cook.’

‘You get excited to share something you love with people.’

‘You are a bad-ass boss lady.’

‘You look adorable in your glasses.’

‘You are the best mom in the world.’

‘Your perfect breasts.’

“Well I thought these were all things about me but that last one makes me wonder” Ali chuckled and studied her keeper’s face for a few seconds, biting her lip as she did so. 

“You’re mostly right, and your breasts are absolutely perfect” Ashlyn replied with a playful smirk and reached over to cup one of her wife’s breasts.

‘You are kind and patient, especially with me.’

‘Your big brain.’

‘The way you sing in the truck.’

‘You make a cute little hum when you get snuggled into bed and you’re ready to fall asleep.’

‘Your talented tongue.’

‘You are really really funny.’

‘You enjoy folding the clean clothes.’

‘Your sexy ass, take 2.’

‘The way you kick your leg out when you come.’

“Ok” she giggled. “This has to be things you like about me. Right?” Ali asked with a tiny blush starting in her cheeks.

“Wrong!” Ashlyn laughed at the shocked face on her wife. She rubbed Ali’s arm and leaned forward for another short kiss, smiling against her lips. “This tin has 40 things that I love about you in it. And it was really hard to stop at 40, let me tell you.”

“Awww, thank you honey” Ali’s face broke into a grin and they shared another kiss, this one a little longer. “This is one of the sweetest things anyone’s ever done for me. I love it.”

“I want to be very clear about one thing though” the keeper’s voice was serious. “I put ‘your sexy ass’ in there more than once and it’s not because I ran out of other things to write.”

“Ok” Ali nodded her head and smirked at her adorable wife. “Whatever you say babe. Whatever you say.”

“It’s completely true” she countered with raised eyebrows. “Let’s be honest, all 40 of these could have said ‘your sexy ass’” she laughed.

“I’m surprised they didn’t” Ali laughed with her and leaned in for another kiss.

The kiss stayed sweet and simple for a couple of minutes before Ali deepened it with a loud moan.

“There’s one in there about that too” Ashlyn mumbled against her wife’s jaw once they broke for air.

“About what?” Ali got up on her knees, careful to keep her face and neck where Ashlyn’s lips could still reach them. 

“That moan...that fucking moan makes me wet every... single...time...” she kept peppering kisses along Ali’s neck, leaning forward and moving with her as the brunette pulled her pajama pants down to her knees and stepped out of them.

As soon as Ali’s ass was exposed the blonde reached around and lovingly caressed it as she helped her wife all the way out of her pants. Ali moved the covers off of Ashlyn and straddled her lap, bringing their lips together in another deep, passionate kiss.

“Are you sure you’re not too tired?” the keeper asked breathlessly, knowing that Dodge had woken up insanely early as he struggled with the time change on the West Coast. Ali had gotten up with him and lost three hours of sleep that morning.

“My sexy ass wants to thank you for all the sweet compliments you always give it” she purred into Ashlyn’s ear. “Sleep can wait.”


	13. Olympics - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a 2-chapter update day today my friends. I'm celebrating the NWSL championship game, which should be a great one to watch. Enjoy!!

The USWNT v China quarterfinal match Friday, August 2nd, was a tough game. Every time the US made a nice play or got a goal, China found a way to keep up and match it. That was until Mallory Pugh had to leave the game after a rough tackle and China took advantage of the extra woman advantage to score the go-ahead goal. Young midfielder Frankie Tagliaferri, forced into the line-up by injuries and yellow-card accumulation suspensions, had been the player off the bench to get the tying goal. She was a scrappy player whose New Jersey upbringing and grit had been honed nicely during her 4 years at Penn State. She played like a woman possessed during the two extra periods after the score remained tied 3-3 at the end of regulation. Tagliaferri was all over the field, breaking up plays, intercepting passes and making clean, well-timed runs out of her wide midfield position. The soccer experts were all talking about her play as the two teams got ready to go to penalty kicks to decide who would advance to the Semi-final round and who would go home. 

Sammy Mewis, Jessie Scarpa, Crystal Dunn, and Ashley Sanchez all sank their penalty kicks for the US. China had made three total, missing the second one. All Tagliaferri had to do was make her pk and the US would move on to the Semi-finals. Most fans were shocked that she was taking a pk. She was good, but this was a pk in an elimination round game at the freaking Olympics! Tags, her nickname, was 22 years old and had barely played last year in the WWC. But that day, against China, she was one of the very best players on the pitch and the coaches saw it too. It wasn’t the prettiest pk or the hardest hit or the best placed... but it went in. She would later joke that she ‘hit it with my purse’ but nobody cared because it freaking went in. Her teammates were quick to praise the way she stepped up and saved the day, twice.

“Well Ashlyn, it looks like you were right about the team being able to play better than the competition they had been facing. How happy are you with the game?” Rebecca Lowe put the keeper on the spot immediately after the on-field coverage for the game was complete.

“Are you kidding?” she grinned and looked at her fellow analysts at the desk before returning her attention to the host. “That was awesome! I don’t know how anybody can be disappointed by that game. It was close, it was competitive, the teams were well-matched.” She paused to try and gather her thoughts for a second. “There were six goals! Including a late one by a young and fairly inexperienced player to tie the game and eventually force the game to pks. And then Tags, as if she hadn’t done enough for the team off the bench, buries the game-winning penalty kick to send the team to the semi-finals.” She exhaled and shook her head. “You can’t script it any better than that. It was great to see the US dig deep and find a way to win this one. They should be happy and proud of the way they performed tonight.”

One person who was thrilled with the game was Meg. She and Hannah had flown to LA that afternoon and had just had time to get to the beach house and meet up with the rest of the group that was attending the game. The 12-year old finished up her soccer camp that morning in DC which was why she hadn’t been able to join the Krieger contingent earlier. Hannah was just staying until Sunday so she could take Meg to one of the women’s basketball games and maybe check out some of the swimming events. Meg had always loved and played both soccer and basketball but by the end of her week at the Olympics she was forevermore hooked on the beautiful game of soccer. Everything she did after leaving LA that August was focused on making her a better soccer player, and goalkeeper to be specific. Ashlyn, of course, was thrilled with the turn of events, but she had never ever pushed Meg one way or the other.

“Wow, look at these two” Hannah enthused as she sat down at the kitchen table of the rented beach house Saturday morning. 

Ali and Kyle were feeding the twins their finger foods and drinking coffee, just before 7am. Hannah hadn’t met the two newest Kriegers yet and couldn’t get over how much they looked like Ashlyn. Right on cue, Dodge gave her a big smile, cheeks full of little bits of scrambled eggs and cheerios, and then threw up all over his tray and his mommy.

“Do you want one?” Kyle joked as he jumped up to get the paper towels from the counter behind him.

Things had been fine between Hannah and the Kriegers for so long now that it was easy to forget that there had ever been so much drama there at the beginning. The older Meg got, the less Ali worried about any bullshit Hannah might cause for them. Ashlyn and her ex-girlfriend had found a comfortable and effective way to communicate and co-parent Meg and, despite all the history and the bad blood between them in the past, all three of them were happy with the arrangement. All four of them if you included Ali. But there were times when the brunette remembered why she used to hate Hannah. There were times, however rare, when Ali felt a pang of jealousy over the close relationship Ashlyn still had with her ex. They had to stay in close touch for Meg and Ali knew it. And usually it didn’t bother her. She had let the damned woman stay in her house with them during their fucking wedding for God’s sake, nobody could ever accuse Ali of being difficult about Meg or Hannah. Ever. 

But that morning as Ali sat there covered in her son’s vomit she couldn’t help but hate Hannah just a little bit. The tall, pretty redhead sat there looking well-rested and fresh-faced even without any make-up. She had a nice silk robe on over her nice silk pajamas and she just looked good and well-cared for and happy. Her life had obviously turned out better than any of her past enemies had ever thought possible and sometimes Ali felt a little jealous. It was always a fleeting, transient feeling and the brunette knew it was mostly her own feelings of inadequacy rearing their head again and nothing more. But that morning Ali hated the way she and her kids and her life must have looked to Hannah. And then she hated herself for thinking it.

“Ash said he used to be a happy spitter” Hannah commented inquisitively, her voice calm and friendly. “Is this the toddler version of that? Is it the same thing?” 

“Yeah, there’s nothing wrong, he just eats too much too fast” Ali shrugged and started to clean up.

“O’s” Dodge said and reached for more of the Cheerios from his tray as he smiled at Hannah.

“No Dodge, just wait a minute buddy” Ali stood up, grabbed his hand and kissed the top of his head. “I’ll get you some more in just a minute.”

Kyle threw a bunch of paper towels on top of the tray and reached with both hands to unlatch it and bring it to the sink to clean it while Ali wiped off her son and took his bib and pajama top off.

“Eggs” Lily replied and put a small handful in her mouth as she watched her brother closely.

“O’s” Dodge giggled at his sister and then reached his hand out towards the box of Cheerios on the table, opening and closing it repeatedly. “Oooooooo’s” he repeated, louder. 

“Can I give him some?” Hannah asked as she picked up the box and smiled at the boy. “I’ll make sure he doesn’t eat too many at once.”

“Sure, if you don’t mind” Ali answered with a sigh as she carefully pulled the long-sleeve Red Sox t-shirt over her head and walked it towards the sink. She didn’t normally walk around in just her sleep tank unless they were at home and it only added to her overall discomfort that morning. “Thanks Hannah.”

“Ewwww, what smells?” Drew asked as he sat in the chair next to Lily and put his sippy cup on the table. 

“Mommy!” Josie reached for Ali as soon as she saw her from her spot, perched on Ashlyn’s hip.

“Your brother threw up big D” Kyle answered Drew as he came back with the clean tray and put it back in place.

“Gross Dodgie” Drew made a face. “Can I have cereal? With milk? But can I pour it?”

“Good morning little one” Ali couldn’t help but smile at Josie’s grinning face as she took her from her wife. “Did you have a good sleep?”

The keeper rubbed Ali’s back and kissed her cheek as she took in the scene in front of her. Her face broke into a big smile and it was impossible not to hear the happiness in her voice when she spoke.

“Welcome to the madhouse Han.”

It was great for Hannah to see for herself how the four families vacationed together. She had heard all sorts of stories from Meg and it had been hard for her to understand the appeal. But, experiencing it in person, it was easy to see why the little girl, an only child, loved her time at the big old house so much – and especially the August vacation week. Their worlds were so different, Ashlyn and Hannah’s, and Meg was able to be comfortable in both. More evidence that she was a pretty amazing kid.

The two semi-final matches were both played on Tuesday, August 6th. The US defeated a very good team from England, 3-2 with the game-winner coming off an incredible free kick from just outside the box. Rose Lavelle bent that ball and curved it right into the upper 90 and there wasn’t a damned thing the wall or the keeper could do about it. It was the goal of the tournament so far and not likely to be beaten for that distinction. The second game was a tough, testy match between Germany and Brazil. Germany had been tremendous all tournament but Brazil, for all of its history and excellence over the years, was the Cinderella story of the 2024 games. The Brazilians had played well back in 2016 when they were the host country for the Rio Olympics. But it wasn’t until the team didn’t even make it out of their Group in the 2020 Olympics that their federation was forced to face the music. Brazil famously supported its men’s national team and had for decades. But there was also very little money for the women’s national team. After the Rio Olympics everybody thought it was going to get better. But the federation thought that the women’s team had performed so well that they didn’t need to invest any more money in them. There was no debate after 2020 and, due to public outcry and intense social scrutiny, the federation finally started spending money on the women’s team. The results in just over three years were remarkable. Everybody noted what a shame it was that the fed hadn’t done it years ago. How great could Brazil have been with a talented, once in a generation superstar like Marta playing for a team that had the support it deserved? She was retired but still working hard to help her former teammates get the respect they deserved. Brazil played for pride and to erase the embarrassment of their previous Olympic failure all tournament long. They beat a powerful German team to punch their ticket to the Gold Medal match against the USA three days later. 

The whole country, all of the USA, was amped up for the Gold medal match that Friday, August 9th. Celebrities were tweeting messages of support. Superstar performers were posting videos urging the USWNT on to victory. The three-day build-up was intense and inspirational and the team, even in their protective bubble, was incredibly moved by all the support. The President of the US, Elizabeth Warren, and her granddaughters were huge fans of the team and attended the game. They even met the team before the game and President Warren gave them a little pep talk that they all talked about for weeks to come. Elizabeth Warren had been a senator from Massachusetts for several years before she became the first woman President in the history of the United States. She had always supported the women’s professional leagues in Boston as much as possible, attending games whenever her schedule allowed. She famously relocated an important meeting to one of the conference rooms in the Breakers stadium so she could go out to join her family in the stands to watch the second half of a big Breakers playoff game. The senator knew Ashlyn and made time to talk with both she and Whitney whenever she attended a game. She spoke with many of the other players as well, but she knew the leaders of the team would relay her encouragement to everybody and let it spread wide. When Senator Warren started her run for President back in 2019 she asked Ashlyn to help campaign for her. Massachusetts would be difficult for her to lose, but she really needed the keeper’s help in New Hampshire, specifically. Ashlyn’s ‘fame’ was national by 2019 and the senator hoped she would help her win the 2020 election. The blonde had found herself side by side with major celebrities from actors to singers to athletes to authors to performers as they made promotional videos throwing their support behind Elizabeth Warren and urging anybody with a brain and a conscience to do the same. In November of 2020, when election night finally came to a close, Elizabeth had done what Hillary hadn’t quite pulled off four years earlier. 

The new leader of the free world eventually got around to appointing many of the men and women who had helped her win election to jobs in and around the White House. Ashlyn had been honored to accept a seat on the President’s Council on Fitness, Sports & Nutrition. She was one of 25 members whose goal was ‘to engage, educate and empower all Americans to adopt a healthy lifestyle that included regular physical activity and good nutrition’. Ashlyn was still serving on that council and would continue to as long as Elizabeth wanted. President Warren and her granddaughters stopped outside the USWNT locker room after their pre-game visit and the former-senator did a double take.

“Ashlyn?” she smiled when the blonde waved to her from across the wide concrete hallway beneath the LA Stadium. The President motioned for her to come over and spoke to one of her aides as the keeper walked towards them. “How are you? It’s so nice to see you?” she grinned as she hugged Ashlyn. 

They spent a couple of minutes talking to her two granddaughters who were now grown young women of 23 and 19 as some of the reporters covering the President’s Olympics visit began to pay attention to the conversation. They talked for a few more minutes and as they were hugging goodbye one of the reporters yelled out a question about how the President knew this striking, short-haired woman.

“Are you kidding me?” the President laughed and put her arm around Ashlyn’s shoulders, pulling her into a side hug and making the keeper blush. “This is Ashlyn Harris, one of the best goalkeepers ever to play the beautiful game” she squeezed her shoulders tightly as she bragged. “She also happens to be part of the broadcast team for the game today” she looked at Ashlyn, “are you in the booth or on the sideline Ash?”

“I’ll be reporting from the sideline, Madam President” the keeper answered respectfully but couldn’t keep the dimpled smile from her face.

“Here’s something I’ll bet you all don’t know about this wonderful woman” the President turned her attention back to the small crowd of reporters who had gathered around them. “I’ve known Ashlyn for years and cheered her on as she brought glory to my hometown team Boston Breakers. But the first time I had a chance to actually spend some time talking with her was in a much different setting.”

Ashlyn furrowed her brow as she tried to think where Elizabeth was going with this. The President noticed the concentration on her face and laughed. 

“It was at the Veteran’s hospital...”

“In Somerville” Ashlyn finished her sentence with her and grinned.

“That’s right” the President nodded. “This one was there on her own, well, with her adorable dog...what was his name?” she looked at the blonde again.

“Fred” Ashlyn smiled.

“Right, Fred” Elizabeth chuckled. “She was there with Fred, visiting the soldiers and spending time talking with them and letting them play with Fred. I couldn’t believe my eyes at first because I was used to seeing her on the soccer pitch and then, on the campaign trail, of course, but that VA hospital was the last place I expected to see you” she was looking at Ashlyn’s face again.

“So you were already President when this happened?”

“Yes, but like I said, it was the first time I had gotten the chance to really sit down with her without the distraction of a soccer match or the frenzy of the campaign. It was a wonderful afternoon” she grinned at the keeper who smiled right back at her, still blushing at the attention.

“It was an amazing afternoon” Ashlyn agreed. “And those soldiers thought so too...I mean, about meeting the President of the United States” she stammered, “not me.”

“Oh come on, we both know the most popular visitor that day was Fred. By a landslide” she laughed and everybody else did too.

After a few more hugs and good luck wishes, Ashlyn moved back into the tunnel to escape the spotlight the leader of the free world had on her at every moment. That meeting and chat had been just as surreal as the afternoon at the Veterans Hospital had been three years earlier. Never in her wildest dreams did Ashlyn imagine she would be talking with the freaking President of the United States of America. She exchanged several texts with her equally excited wife and then had to get back to work. It was only the Olympic gold medal match, no big deal.

NBC Sports moved their ’studio’ set to the soccer stadium so they could all be right on top of the action, the analyst desk right there pitchside. Nobody from the Krieger contingent wanted to miss the game so Ali used her helpers, Tammye and Carol, along with Whitney and Ryan and brought all five kids to the game. She wanted them all to witness history being made when the US became the first team ever to win the WWC and the Olympics back to back in two years.

When the dust settled after a hard-fought but surprisingly technical and civilized match, the Brazilians had fought valiantly and often brilliantly. But they couldn’t beat the US who played like a team on a mission. They defeated Brazil 4-3 with goals by Lynn Williams, a brace by Jessie Scarpa and the game-winner by captain Sammy Mewis who put away a perfect corner kick from Rose Lavelle with her head. There were several Brazilian players who played their club soccer in the NWSL so a lot of the US players had friends on the opposing side that day. There were lots of hugs and tears between the two teams which was a stark contrast to the state of affairs between the two teams from back in 2011. Jerseys were swapped and congratulations were given after the game. When it was time for the medal presentation, the US players lined up in the ultimate show of respect, the victory tunnel. They stood side by side, creating a tunnel for the Brazilian players to walk through on their way to the podium. The US players applauded their vanquished foes as they walked through, the Brazilians clearly moved by the classy gesture. 

After the medals were handed out and the team was celebrating and taking pictures on the field, Ashlyn brought Meg onto the field with her as she interviewed players. It was a little nerve-wracking for Ali but she trusted both her wife and her step-daughter to be smart and not get separated. It wasn’t long before Abby Smith, Sammy Mewis and Rose Lavelle were badgering their former keeper and friend to let them bring Drew and Josie down too. Ashlyn had so many friends and former teammates down there, including Alex Morgan, Abby Wambach, and Heather O’Reilly among others that she really wasn’t worried about the kids getting lost or being in danger. They all had the time of their lives, kids, players and analysts alike. It was really something special and it took poor Meg a full three days to be able to talk about it without crying from excitement and nerves.

All in all, the LA trip had been fantastic. They stayed through the closing ceremony on Sunday, enjoying another cool march of the countries and a kick-ass fireworks show. There were definitely challenges and it wasn’t always easy, but everybody got along well, for the most part, and any upsets had been quickly rectified. There were no hospital visits and nobody got lost for more than ten minutes. All things considered, it was a smashing success. And, as if the Olympics themselves weren’t enough excitement for the group, another major development happened as they vacationed in LA. Whitney confided in her best friend the first day they got to LA, during a late-night diaper run, that she and Ryan were finally expecting their first child. The lawyer was about a month along and the baby was due in March and Ashlyn had never seen her bestie more excited in her whole life. 

“Oh my God Whit, I’m so happy for you guys!” Ashlyn gushed as they hugged in the baby supply aisle of the 24-hour supermarket. “When did you find out?”

“We just got the official official confirmation yesterday afternoon” she squealed excitedly. 

Ashlyn could count on one hand the number of times Whitney Elizabeth Engen Flanagan had squealed. This was time #4.

“Man, your parents must be so psyched! They can finally be grandparents” Ashlyn grinned.

“They will be, that’s for sure” Whitney let her bestie go and started looking for the items on the list Ali, Molly and Sydney had put together. It didn’t make any sense to pack and ship all the baby crap they’d need while they were at the beach house so they just planned to buy it once they arrived.

“You haven’t told them yet?” Ashlyn couldn’t hide her shock.

“Well, no” Whitney shrugged. “I’m having lunch with them tomorrow. We just got here and I probably wouldn’t be telling you yet either except that here we are in the baby aisle and I just can’t keep it in another second” she rattled off quickly and happily. “We’re finally having a baby Ash!”

And just like that, the Olympic vacation came to a close and everybody flew home on Monday after enjoying the closing ceremony and the last bit of LA they could fit in. Ryan had come out for the very last weekend and Tammye and Carol stayed to start their west coast vacation with lots of advice from Whitney and her parents on what not to miss as they drove up the coast. The trip home was not great, full of flight delays and airport meltdowns by kids in all the age groups at different times. But all of the families were glad they had done it. It was probably a once in a lifetime experience and they knew they were lucky to have been able to do it with everybody together. 

//

The very next weekend was the beginning of the big 40th birthday celebration in Rhode Island for Ali, Sydney, Molly and the rest of their friends who were all turning 40 years old that year. Carm, Jessie and Liz were going to be at the rental house for the full week, Saturday to Saturday. Liz found the house through a friend of hers who had relatives who lived in Rhode Island. Everybody always focused on Newport, RI and the incredible mansions there. And, no doubt, those were really amazing to tour and experience and Newport was one of Ali’s favorite places to visit. But the rest of the Rhode Island shore was pretty terrific too. There were dozens of beaches and beachside towns to visit and enjoy all summer long. The house Liz rented for them was near Watch Hill, just off of Misquamicut Beach in Westerly, RI and it was right on the beach. These ladies knew what they liked and they liked to vacation in beach houses! This one was an average size cottage with a big, wraparound porch on the front and side of the house. The back of the house, on the beach side, had a screen porch that was the most comfortable and popular room of all. Before the week was through, the women had spent more time there than anyplace else. Somehow, even though it faced South and got a lot of sun all afternoon, it was the coolest room in the house. There were four bedrooms up on the second floor and no air conditioning. That would have been a deal-breaker except that Liz’s cousin had stayed in the house before and swore that if you opened the windows and kept the bedroom doors open you would get a beautiful cross-breeze that made it bearable to sleep at night, no matter how hot the temperature outside got. Worst case scenario, you would need a fan on you at night. They all agreed to trust Liz’s cousin and, thankfully, she had been correct.

The women who had children, Ali, Sydney, Erica and Molly, made the 90-minute drive down to RI bright and early Wednesday morning. They had to be out of the house by noon on Saturday so that gave them 3-1/2 days to rest and relax and celebrate, and sometimes bemoan, turning 40. Carm, Jessie and Liz waited hand and foot on their mom friends all day Wednesday, trying to get them caught up and on vacation time as fast as possible. They also had seen how hard it was to be a mom and wanted to do something nice for Ali, Sydney, Erica and Molly too. They all spent three glorious nights talking and laughing and drinking and reminiscing. It felt like they were young again, having sleepovers at their parents’ houses and making big plans for their futures. They told secrets, some innocent and silly and others painful and poignant. They shared fears and hopes and dreams. Liz confessed that she was afraid she would never find the right guy. Carm told them all about her embarrassing wedding night. Molly thanked them all for letting her into their tight-knit group and making her feel like an equal. Sydney joked about the condition of her vagina after 2 big-headed Dwyer boys had plowed their way through it and laughingly hoped Dom would still want to have sex with her. Ali admitted that she sometimes was paralyzed by the fear that something bad would happen to destroy her seemingly too-perfect life. And Erica finally asked her friends to help her figure out what to do with her marriage.

Those three nights were such a rare, special treat for all of the women and they squeezed all the life and love out of every second of them. Who knew when they would all be able to get away like that together again? They reveled in their friendship and swore sacred oaths to try and make a trip like that an annual event, for at least a weekend. They were all in different places in their lives, for the most part, but their three nights together managed to feed the soul of each woman. Each woman got something different out of the house and the beach and the saltwater and their time together, but they all left feeling refreshed and recharged and impossibly, fleetingly, young again.

//

While Ali was in RI Ashlyn held down the fort at the big old house with the help of Meg and Vicki Krieger. Ken popped in when he could but soccer season was ramping up and his schedule was busy again already. It had taken them almost a full week to get everybody back on their regular eating and napping and bedtime schedules and it had been a brutal week at that. But once they were back on track they all fell into their rhythm again and, aside from the occasional tantrum or hysterical crying jag, the kids were all good. Meg had been moodier than usual, struggling herself with jetlag and 12-1/2 year old angst. She settled down more as the younger kids got back into their routines, but the pre-teen was not her happy-go-lucky self. Ashlyn chalked it up to the big and busy trip to LA. That had been more excitement than most of the grown-ups could handle and the keeper wasn’t surprised that Meg seemed to be feeling the effects of it too. The Thursday that Ali was gone was when it all became crystal clear to the blonde.

“Hey Ash” Vicki spoke softly, not wanting to startle the keeper as she closed Dodge’s bedroom door after putting him down for his afternoon nap. “Got a minute?”

“What’s up?”

Vicki motioned towards the bathroom in the second-floor hall and stepped into it with Ashlyn right behind her.

“I came up to put a new roll of toilet paper in here and I found this” she held up the small trash can that typically only held crumpled up small dixie cups that the kids rinsed their mouths out with after brushing their teeth.

Ashlyn looked into the trash can and raised her eyebrows. There were six or seven tampons in there, all opened and looking like they had been used, but without any blood on them. She frowned and sighed.

“Thanks Vicki” she nodded and took the trash can from her. “I’ll take care of it.”

The second-floor bathroom was now typically referred to as the girls bathroom with the other bathroom, between Drew and Dodge’s room, the boys bathroom. The tampons and pads that Ali and Ashlyn used for their periods were all kept in their master bathroom, and that’s typically the bathroom they were thrown away in as well. 

“Drew’s going to show me his new video game” Vicki patted Ashlyn’s arm as she passed her and left the bathroom. “So take your time. She’s upstairs in her room.”

The keeper climbed the stairs to the third floor and knocked on Meg’s open door.

“Can I come in Meggie?”

“Yeah” she replied and put the summer reading list book on her stomach, still open to the page she was reading.

Meg was laying on her bed, propped up against the headboard with Persey curled up next to her hip.

“I thought you were going over to Emma’s this afternoon, change your mind?” the keeper asked as she sat on the edge of the bed by Meg’s legs, resting her hand on the girl’s knee and giving it a friendly squeeze.

“No, she’s just not home yet.”

Emma Donaldson was a year older than Meg but the two had been good friends for several years now. They had gotten especially close once Meg began to spend more time at the big old house in August each year. Emma was allergic to pet dander so she couldn’t spend too much time at Meg’s so the redhead went to Emma’s most afternoons.

“So, ummm, I want to talk to you about something” Ashlyn started, trying to keep her voice even and as non-threatening as possible. “Would now be ok?”

“Sure” she fidgeted a little and her eyes darted from Ashlyn’s face to her own lap and back again.

The keeper explained how she found the tampons in the trash can and how she knew from Hannah that Meg had started getting her period that summer and asked her if she had any questions about how any of it worked.

“No, not really” the girl blushed and looked down again. “Mom told me all about it already.”

“Oh, ok” Ashlyn paused and changed tactics. “Well, I don’t know about you, but when my mom explained how periods and tampons and cramps worked I wanted to disappear” she chuckled. “I nodded and said yes and told her I understood what she was saying but I really hadn’t heard a thing she said because I was so embarrassed.” Ashlyn noticed a look of relief flash across Meg’s pink face. “I didn’t need to be embarrassed, but I was. And the worst part was that I really needed to know what she was telling me.”

“What did you do?”

“One of my friends had an older sister and we asked her all sorts of questions but she wasn’t very good at explaining because she was just a kid too, really. But it was better than nothing” she chuckled and patted Meg’s leg again.

They were both quiet for a minute and Ashlyn reached across Meg’s legs to pat Persey and let the girl find her voice. The redhead sat up a little bit more and Ashlyn really thought she was going to say something. But she didn’t.

“Is that what happened to you when your mom was telling you about everything?” She prodded a little. “It’s totally ok if it did you know. It happens to the best of us” she winked and was rewarded with an actual smile, small though it was.

“Yeah” she ducked her head down into her neck and blushed even more.

“I thought so” Ashlyn nodded. “Well I just wanted to let you know that you can always talk to me or Ali about all of this stuff too. Anytime. Whether you’re here with us and we talk in person or if you want to call me or facetime me when you get back home. Ok kiddo?”

“Yeah.”

“Your mom told me you got your period for the first time in June, is that right?” the keeper was trying to keep it light to make sure Meg knew she was cool about it.

“Um, yeah, June” she paused and chewed on her lip for a few seconds, deciding if she was going to say anything else or not. “I was at soccer camp and the nurse gave me a big pad to wear” she shuddered at the memory. “You could totally see it through my shorts and I wanted to die.”

“Oooh, that sucks. How come nurses only ever have those big huge pads? They never give you one of the thin ones that works just as well” she chuckled. “It must be some nurse rule. We should ask Emma’s mom!” Ashlyn broke into a big smile and Meg matched it, laughing.

“No, don’t do that” Meg giggled. “Mom said it’s because that’s the only kind they can afford and they buy, like, a million of them at once...”

“Bulk” Ashlyn nodded. “They buy them in bulk. I’ll bet that’s absolutely right” they both giggled. “Did your mom get you the thin kind of pads?”

“Yeah. And then some that are really long to wear at night so I don’t...” she stopped and blushed again.

“Get blood on your pajamas or sheets?”

“Yeah” she answered in barely a whisper.

“That happens to everybody you know. Don’t feel bad. It’s annoying because then you have to clean it up and wash things, but it happens a lot. But those long pads are pretty good about making it happen less.”

Another look of relief landed on Meg’s red face and the blonde swore she saw the girl’s shoulders drop about two inches too. They continued on like that for about an hour as the keeper asked her lots of questions about her first two periods and how she was keeping track of them and answered several questions about her own first few periods. It turned out that Meg was the first one of her friends to start menstruating and the same thing had happened with Hannah. Meg’s mom had been early to hit puberty and early to develop breasts and early to get her period and she had told her daughter that the same thing would probably happen to her too. Ashlyn learned that Emma Donaldson didn’t have her period yet either. 

“Hey, at least you don’t have some jerky brother teasing you about it” Ashlyn rolled her eyes. “God that was annoying.”

They spent more time talking about cramps and how everybody’s are different and Meg asked about swimming and taking a shower or a bath with her period. The keeper successfully kept her laughter to herself. It was obvious that Meg had tuned Hannah right out because Ashlyn knew that her ex had painstakingly explained all of this to not so little anymore Meg. The keeper knew because Hannah had called her in tears to tell her that her baby had become a woman. It was one of the few times that Ashlyn felt like she had been truly helpful and supportive and she was grateful that Hannah had called her and shared the experience with her. There was no way Dev would have understood what his wife was feeling.

“Well, now that you’ll be having your period every month I should show you where we keep everything” Ashlyn stood up and was glad to see Meg put her book away and get off the bed too. “We’ll get you a drawer in the girls bathroom and you can keep all your supplies there if you want.”

“Won’t Josie get into it though?” Meg asked as they walked down to the second-floor hall and stopped outside the girls bathroom, Persey following close behind.

“Yes she will” Ashlyn gave Meg an impressed look. “Good thinking smartie-pants. Maybe we can make you a spot right here in the linen closet” she motioned to the hall linen closet right outside the bathroom door. “Will that work?”

Meg shrugged and they continued into the master bathroom where Ashlyn opened the drawer with all of their tampons and pads in it. They talked about the different sizes of tampons and Meg’s eyes went wide at the thought that you used a different one at different times of your period. After some more questions the girl finally admitted what she had been trying to do earlier with the tampons in the trash can.

“I think I’ll get my period on Sunday and I don’t want to waste my last week here not swimming because I won’t wear a pad in my bathing suit” she spoke quickly and kept her eyes on the tiled floor. “So I wanted to use tampons this time...”

“Ahh, gotcha” the keeper nodded and took her time with her response. “It didn’t go very well with the tampons eh?”

“No” Meg whispered. “They...they hurt.”

“Rule number one with tampons is that you don’t want to be putting one inside you if you don’t have your period because that’s what can happen. It’s not really the tampon’s fault though, it’s just that your body isn’t ready to have it inside yet...”

Ashlyn opened a new box of tampons and pulled out the instructions, trying to remember the last time she had ever looked at them. She swallowed a chuckle and tried hard to keep her cool as she walked her sweet little Meg through the steps. It wasn’t until four days later that Meg came running down the stairs from her third-floor room, careening towards the master bedroom and breathing heavily. She skidded to a stop in front of the door, bare feet grabbing at the hard wood floor, and knocked.

“Ali, Ali are you in there?” she called out breathlessly.

She could hear movement from inside the room and tried to steady her breathing. She knew Ali was home, she saw her truck pull into the driveway fifteen minutes ago. It didn’t matter much to her then, but Emma had just called and now it was imperative that the redhead talk to Ali right away.

“Come in Meg” the brunette answered from behind the door.

When Ali had returned from her 40th birthday long weekend on Saturday afternoon, Ashlyn had filled her in on the latest development with Meg and the tampons. The keeper explained what they had talked about and told her wife that she thought Meg was still uncomfortable talking about it with her. Ali agreed to check in with the girl later that night after the little kids were in bed and they wouldn’t be interrupted. The conversation had gone similarly to Ashlyn’s experience with her but Meg was definitely more chatty with Ali. She admitted that Emma was setting up a beach day for Meg’s last week at the big old house and there would be girls and boys there. Ali promised Meg that she would help her with the tampons as soon as Meg got her period – they would figure it out together and the brunette would talk her through it. Ashlyn had gone online and found some instructional videos and they all watched them together the next night, Meg getting a little more shy again when it was time to ask questions.

“Hannah called this way back when we got married” Ashlyn said with a pensive smile as they settled in to bed Sunday night, tampon videos still on the brain.

“What are you talking about Ash?”

“When we brought Meg back to DC after she stayed with us after the wedding...”

“Oh, right. When we flew down to meet Johnny for the first time” she smiled at the memory. “What did Hannah call?”

“We watched Meg, what was she? 6 at the time?” the keeper cocked her head to do the math. “She dragged you into her room to show you all her stuff and Hannah pretty much described you as a mom perfectly.”

“What did she say” Ali was curious as hell about this.

“She said that you would always be the one that kids went to when they were hurt or nervous” Ashlyn reached over and caressed her wife’s arm as she spoke. “She said there was a steadiness to you that kids would respond to. She was absolutely right” the keeper grinned. “And Meg has always gone to you with the tough questions. I think she waits until I’m not around so she doesn’t have to choose or maybe she’s trying to spare my feelings” she chuckled. “I don’t know. But she’s always done it. I’m not surprised she’s doing it now too.”

They were both quiet for a few minutes as they set the alarm for Monday morning and got comfortable and ready to go to sleep. Ali curled into her wife’s side and gently rubbed her chest.

“Does it bother you that she does that?” Ali asked softly, wanting to talk about it some more but afraid of hurting Ashlyn’s feelings.

“No” the keeper shook her head and sighed. “It makes me happy that she trusts you so much. I wish she trusted me like that, with those things, but I know she loves me.”

“I don’t think it’s that she doesn’t trust you babe” Ali tried to explain. “I think you’re too much like her mother...you’re too much of a parent to her and she feels more embarrassed talking about her body and sex and boys to you than she does to me. I’m a half-step further away from being her mother. Does that make sense? Like, you know Meg loves Hannah the most of all but she’s the last person she wants to talk to about this stuff, right?”

“Yeah, I see what you mean” Ashlyn leaned her head down and pressed a kiss into the top of Ali’s head. “I hadn’t thought about it like that, but that actually makes a lot of sense.”

“Well of course it does” the brunette giggled and squeezed her wife’s torso. “I always make a lot of sense, remember?”

Monday evening, Meg opened the door to the master bedroom and saw Ali immediately. She was directly opposite her across the room standing in front of her closet by the head of the bed, hanging up her suit jacket.

“Hi honey, how was your day?” she asked with a smile as she started to change her clothes for the evening.

“Umm, good” she answered abruptly and walked to the foot of the bed, standing anxiously as Ali pulled a t-shirt over her head and unzipped her skirt.

“What’s up” the brunette chuckled and grinned at the girl. “You look like you’re about to explode.”

“I ah, umm, I...” she stammered.

“Take a breath and slow down for a second” Ali tried to calm her as she inspected the skirt she had just stepped out of to see if it needed to be dry cleaned yet. “I’m not going anywhere. Just take a minute and breathe, ok?”

“Ok” Meg exhaled and took a couple of deep breaths, even closing her eyes for a few seconds. “I got my period today and Emma just called to say that tomorrow is the beach day. I really need to be able to use a tampon tomorrow” she rattled off quickly, out of breath again by the time she had finished.

“Oh, well, alright then” Ali nodded seriously and pulled a pair of athletic shorts on before wrapping Meg up in a hug and kissing her on the top of her head. “It’s a good thing I stopped and bought some supplies on my way home then” she motioned towards the two bags of different sizes and styles of tampons and pads on the bed. Ali smiled at the girl as they ended the hug and was relieved that she had remembered to get a few kinds of the beginners' tampons. “Tonight we’ll practice together, ok?”

“Tonight?” she whined as the brunette put her arm around her shoulders and walked her towards the backstairs. “Can’t we do it now?”

“No, it’s almost dinner time and you know what a zoo it is after dinner around here.” Ali felt the girl’s shoulders slump and saw her chin drop to her chest as they walked down the stairs together. She really wanted to help her but the timing was terrible. The last thing she wanted was to make Meg feel rushed or to have one of the kids interrupt them. But she could tell how important this was to Meg. “Let’s just see how it goes after dinner. I promise we’ll start as soon as possible. I promise.”

Ashlyn and Ali decided to leave the kitchen clean-up until later so the brunette could go upstairs with Meg right after dinner and have their first lesson. It didn’t go well. No matter how many times Ali encouraged the nervous girl to relax, poor Meg just got more and more tense. The brunette stood patiently outside the master bathroom door, head leaning close and ear finely tuned to what was going on beyond the closed door. They had already gone over the mechanics of how the tampon worked and Ali showed her exactly how it worked, demonstrating how to hold it and when to push the plunger and everything she could do except actually do it for her. After 45 minutes she could hear Meg crying.

“Aw Meggie” Ali chewed her bottom lip and held her breath for a second. “I’m coming in.”

Later that night Ashlyn hugged her wife and felt the brunette rest her whole body weight against her strong keeper as they stood in their bedroom.

“How’d it go?” she asked eagerly, taking half a step back to hold up her beautiful brunette.

“Oh she did good, finally. You know how impossible it is to relax when someone’s telling you to” she chuckled softly. “It just never works.”

“So what did you do?”

“I just went in so I could see what she was doing. Poor kid had the angle all wrong...”

“Please tell me she had the right opening...please...” Ashlyn begged, only half-joking.

“Yeah” Ali giggled. “All of the anatomy lessons over the years have definitely worked. She knows where her vagina is.”

“Atta girl. I’m so proud” the blonde giggled, but really did feel proud.

“She was so upset Ash. She just was desperate and she started to cry and all I could think of was how lucky I was that Sydney got her period before me” she chuckled as her wife held her. “And then I remembered how Sandi had taught Syd and I decided to give it a shot.”

Ashlyn leaned back and nervously looked at her wife’s tired face. It had been a stressful evening for them both, the blonde handling the younger kids solo for a couple of hours while Ali worked with Meg. The keeper was nervous because Sandi and Syd were closer than most moms and daughters, at least in Ashlyn’s experience. She knew it was because they had been friends for most of their lives as well as mother and daughter. To this day the two women joked and teased each other about everything, including sex.

“Why am I afraid of this” Ashlyn sighed and chuckled. “Should I call Hannah now or can it wait until the morning?”

“Oh stop” Ali slapped her chest lightly and flopped onto the bed with a dramatic sigh. She rolled onto her back and saw that her wife was really nervous about it. “Ashlyn, relax. Syd’s mom was just never shy around her or us” she shrugged. “Which is why Syd isn’t shy about too much either. It’s kind of awesome, especially at times like this.”

“Ok, so how did she teach Syd. Just tell me” she stood at the foot of the bed with her legs between Ali’s legs and her hands resting on Ali’s shins.

“Sandi finally just stood behind her and put her hands right on top of Syd’s hands and guided her while she put it in. Syd was actually mad that they had wasted hours trying it any other way. It was just so simple.”

“Wow” Ashlyn’s eyes went wide. “Did Meg let you do that for her?”

“I asked her first...I told her about Syd and Sandi and asked her if that sounded like a good idea and she said yes...”

“Wow...you’re fucking awesome.”

“Well, she did all the hard work” the brunette chuckled and stretched. “But yeah, wow. Not how I thought I’d be spending my evening.”

“I never would have thought to do that” the keeper looked bashfully at her wife.

“You’re up for Josie when it’s time” Ali giggled and Ashlyn laughed out loud at the thought. “Deal. If I play my cards right though, Josie will ask Meg for help first.”

“Oooh, I never thought of that” Ali’s eyebrows went up. “That would be so sweet” she tilted her head and smiled a little sadly. “But I kind of want them to come to us. You know?”

“Yeah, I get it. I guess it doesn’t really matter who they go to as long as they feel comfortable. And as long as they get the right information” she sighed and sat down on the foot of the bed. “Man, being a parent is hard.”


	14. Dinner and a Movie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second chapter for today.... hope you like it.
> 
> Smut warning at the end.

The other big development from the last week of their Olympic vacation was little miss Lily finally taking her first steps. There was no big audience for it and not much of a ruckus involved. Sydney, Sandi and Ali had stayed at the beach house to take care of the little kids and their afternoon naps. It was the third week of vacation and Ali, in particular, wanted to make sure Tammye and Carol got to attend as many Olympic events as possible during their week-long stay. Ali and Sydney had already been to two weeks worth of amazing competition. Besides, it was only fair that the two best friends handled afternoon naptime for the group since 5 of the 6 kids who needed naps were theirs. Only little Penny Cross wasn’t a Dwyer or a Krieger. It was 2:30pm and Ali and Sydney were sitting on the beach in front of the rented house with the three youngest kids, Dodge, Lily and Maddox. The twins had just woken up from the afternoon naps but the three bigger kids were still enjoying their longer afternoon nap. Josie, James and Penny only took one nap a day but it was a three-hour one to recharge their little batteries for the last five hours of their day. Sandi was in the house with the nappers and Sydney had just finished breastfeeding Maddox and settled him inside the little sun tent next to the big beach blanket they were camped out on.

“I don’t really think there’s a way to thank you enough for all of this Al, but I’m gonna keep trying” the coach chuckled as she turned her attention back to her best friend who was on her knees, three feet in front of the blanket, digging in the damp, hard-packed sand with Dodge. “Thank you boo. This trip has been unbelievable.”

Sydney sat on the blanket and adjusted the sun hat on Lily’s head as the little girl gnawed on a baby carrot and watched her brother digging in the sand.

“I should be thanking all of you guys” Ali replied as she sat back on her heels and looked at her bestie. “If you hadn’t agreed to do the vacation out here with us we’d have missed it this year.”

“Oh so that’s how you’re spinning it huh?” the coach chuckled again. “I love you Alibaba, but you’re just too good to be true sometimes.”

Lily decided she wanted to get her hands dirty and join the fun in the sand. Sydney helped her up and walked her over to the hole so the little girl was standing just to the side of Ali and a little farther away from Dodge. It was smart procedure to give Dodge a wide berth whenever possible so his enthusiasm and strength didn’t end up all over you as well. As they stood there, Sydney’s hands still holding Lily’s above her head, a handsome young man came into view a short distance down the beach. He was jogging and there was a beautiful white lab running along with him, unleashed and well-behaved. Lily saw the dog and started talking and trying to get Sydney to walk her down towards the water and the dog.

“Doggie! Doggie!”

The whole Krieger group was missing their dogs and none more than little Lily, the dog-whisperer.

“I see the doggie” Sydney answered her as the girl started bouncing up and down and doing anything she could to get closer to the animal. “He’s running though baby girl, we can’t go see him” she tried to explain, patiently.

“Doggie! Doggie!” Lily repeated even louder.

It was hard to know whether the dog heard her little voice or could just sense that her dog-loving heart was about to burst, but the lab picked his head up and looked right at Lily and Sydney. Without missing a step, he turned to his left and started trotting up the beach towards them, wagging his tail.

“Cisco! Heel!” the jogger commanded and slowed his pace. “Cisco! Heel!”

The dog stopped and turned back to look at his owner who stood with his hands on his hips, breathing heavy and frowning at the pooch. Cisco was halfway between the jogger and Lily, about ten feet away from both of them. He looked back at Lily and wagged his tail again, ignoring the commands he had been given. Lily was about to jump out of her skin she was so excited to see the dog. Ali stood up cautiously, ready to protect her family from any unfriendly advances. The dog certainly looked friendly but she wasn’t taking any chances with her babies.

“Don’t worry, he’s super friendly” the jogger called up to them with a wave as he started to walk after the dog.

“Ok” Ali called back with her own wave.

“Doggie!” Lily bounced and whined and started moving her legs towards him even though Sydney still had her hands above her head.

“Please let her see this dog” Sydney giggled. “I can’t take the heartbreak if you don’t.”

“Yeah, he looks sweet. Go ahead. Thanks Syd.”

“Cisco stay” the jogger commanded from about five feet away and the dog just stood there, wagging his tail and smiling at Lily as she and Sydney walked towards him.

The toddler wasn’t happy with the slow pace and wriggled one of her hands free, reaching out towards the dog with it and squealing in excitement.

“Easy does it Lil” the coach cautioned. “Hey, Al, are you watching this?” she asked over her shoulder.

“Yeah” Ali couldn’t hide the excitement in her voice. “Is she gonna do what I think she’s gonna do?”

“Wanna find out?” Sydney asked, just as excited.

“Yes I do!” the brunette moved towards her daughter who was about to take her very first steps.

Sydney let go of her other hand and held her breath. Lily squealed again now that she was free and lurched forward, out of balance. The sand wasn’t helping, but at least it was damp and hard down closer to the water where they were. The jogger caught up to his dog and stood behind him, watching Lily approach like a tiny pink version of Frankenstein’s monster. She took a step and caught her balance after a quick pause. Then she took another one with another pause. Then she took a third step and had reached the dog.

“You did it Lily!” Ali enthused as Sydney clapped her hands and cheered. “What a big girl!”

“Doggie!” she replied as she wrapped her arms around Cisco’s thick shoulder and neck and squeezed. Lily was never too rough with any of the animals in her life. She was always gentle and careful with them, even before she had complete control of her motor skills. “Mommy, doggie!”

“I’m sorry we hijacked your dog” Ali smiled at the jogger as she caught up with her daughter. “She looooooves dogs and we’re here on vacation and she’s really missing ours at home.”

“Oh, no problem. Sometimes people don’t want anything to do with a dog on the beach so I never know” he patted his dog. “He’s usually great, he never does this. I can’t remember the last time he didn’t heel when I told him to” he shook his head and frowned.

“Well, we call her the dog-whisperer because she just has a way with them” Ali offered as she gave Cisco a pat too. “And I owe you a big thank you because your dog just got her to take her very first steps!”

“No way!” the jogger exclaimed. “That’s so cool. Good boy Cisco.”

“Smile everybody” Sydney sang out as she snapped a picture of the momentous occasion. 

That picture, as well as the three other ones that included Dodge and Lily in different poses with Cisco between them and the ocean behind them, became another Krieger family favorite.

“We’re here for the rest of the week if you ever want to bring Cisco by for a visit. I can guarantee you a house full of kids and grown-ups who would be thrilled to see him” Ali laughed.

“I’ll keep that in mind” the jogger replied. “And I know where to look first if he decides to take off on me again.”

The fourth, and final, Krieger baby had conquered the last hurdle to true mobility. Both twins were walking and it was exciting and terrifying at the same time.

//

The last week of August was also the beginning of Drew’s second year of little league soccer. It was when the teams were announced and registration finalized. There were team meetings where the coach met all of their players and hopefully at least one of their parents too. Colorful t-shirts were handed out as team jerseys with local sponsors’ names emblazoned across the back. The first game wasn’t until the weekend after Labor Day, but it all kicked off that last week of August. Gloucester’s ‘Fishermen Youth Soccer’ was serious business too. Sports, in general, were taken very seriously in New England and the mostly blue-collar, hard-working town of Gloucester was no exception. As was common with most little league soccer programs, the kids had to be 4 years old to play, by July 31st, and you aged out at 18 after you finished playing for the U19 local club team. The 4 and 5-year olds played games on 6 Saturdays in September and October, three in each month. The 6 and 7-year olds played 8 games instead, stretching the season a little longer. The program continued for 8-year olds through 13-year olds if the kids wanted to keep playing through elementary and middle school. Then there was the high school sports program that took over.

In addition to this basic progression of soccer there was also the ‘Cape Ann United’ travelling team that was more competitive and was run parallel to the basic program. Three different towns participated in this league – Gloucester, Rockport and the joint school system of Manchester/Essex, and they were all located on Cape Ann which was the part of Massachusetts that stuck out into the Atlantic on the North Shore. Not as big or as popular as Cape Cod down on the Southern border of the state, but twice as proud. Ali could tell a dozen different stories about how hard it had been for her to sell windows and doors to builders up on Cape Ann when she started. They were loyal as fuck and didn’t want to give any business to anybody who wasn’t from Cape Ann. She eventually won many of them over but not one of them was easy. Half of the games were on the road and half were at home and the age breakdowns were: U6, U8, U10, U12, U14, U16, U18 and U19. Soccer was played in the Fall in New England. But there was also an indoor league that played at the Gloucester YMCA with U8 and U10 teams.

Ali and Ashlyn had both started the process of getting their coaching licenses, knowing they would be involved with their children’s teams. Ashlyn did the courses right alongside Ali even though she was eligible for a waiver for the first couple of levels because of her extensive professional playing experience. The licenses started at the ‘F’ level, which was for beginner coaches who were coaching 5-8 year olds, and went up through ‘E’, ‘D’, ‘C’, ‘B’, ‘A’ and ‘Pro’ levels. Niki Cross and Sydney Dwyer both held ‘B’ level licenses which meant they were eligible to coach at the high school and college levels. Ken Krieger held the highest possible coaching license, the ‘Pro’ level license. This meant he could coach in any of the professional leagues that operated in the US. He was also a regional scout for US Soccer, focusing on the men’s youth program. His specialty was high school boys teams and he was an extremely technical coach who had a gift for teaching not only the fundamentals, but introducing some of the finer points of the game to the young players.

Ali knew she was coaching for her kids and that she wasn’t trying to make a career out of it. Ashlyn went through the licensing steps because she thought she might want to get into coaching at some point down the line and wanted to be prepared and keep her options open. Neither of them was ready last year when Drew started his first ever year of soccer – the twins were 3-months old and they were overwhelmed with learning how to be moms to four children. But this year Ali had signed up and been approved to coach Drew’s U6 team. It was co-ed, up until the U8 team, and they met on Saturdays from 12-1pm to practice for a while and then have a game against another team. The whole thing was adorable and Ali and Ashlyn both smiled so much their faces hurt watching the 7 v 7 plus a goalie ‘games’ being played. There were 10-12 kids on each team and every game two or three of them didn’t show up for one reason or another. Everybody played equally and everyone took a turn in goal as well. It was impossible for one coach to wrangle their whole team for an entire hour. There just was no way, physically or even vocally, that any coach could handle that. So parents volunteered to help coach or at least help coach their own kid and get them to participate and do what the coach was asking. Some teams had official assistant coaches and that depended on the commitment level of the parents involved. Ali was pleased to see that her team had such a coach and even happier when she read the name online the night before their first practice and game. ‘Sam Machado’. He had told her earlier that summer that he was going to try and get more involved in some of Ethan’s activities that year and she was glad he had actually done it. She knew he didn’t need her pity, but she couldn’t help it. Her heart broke for both Sam and Ethan, equally.

Drew’s team was sponsored by Machado’s Pizzeria and they had Sam’s parents to thank for that. Machado’s had been a local sponsor for years and they were just thrilled that for the first time in a long time, an actual Machado would be playing on the team. Ethan Machado was just as average in size and skills as Drew was. They were two peas in a pod really. Ethan wore #7 on his maroon t-shirt jersey and Drew wore #14. He wanted #24 because that had been his mama’s number, but the jerseys only went up to 15 so it wasn’t an option. Whitney came up for the first game that Saturday afternoon and Deb, Ken and Vicki joined them too. Ashlyn was grateful because it could be challenging keeping track of all three of her youngest kids now that both twins were walking. Ali saw her family and smiled as she talked to her team and tried to get them excited for practice. A pang of nerves hit her hard as she started to work the kids through the first drill. She was a rookie coach and her father, one of the best coaches she had ever known, was sitting there on the sideline watching everything with his careful, considerate eye. He had never, and would never, put any pressure on his daughter about coaching style or method or even results. It was all in her head and she knew it, but that didn’t make it any less real for her that sunny September afternoon.

The nerves only lasted about fifteen minutes though. They were quickly replaced by so many cute moments with the kids that Ali completely forgot her dad was watching. Some of the kids were Drew’s size, just under 4’ tall and thin, and others were about half that size. Some were practically midgets! Their t-shirts looked like dresses, hanging down around their shins. It was remarkable how differently they all grew and changed. Once the game finally started there were even more adorable moments. The ball was over near the sideline where all the parents and families were sitting in folding chairs or on blankets. As typically happened, about ten of the kids convened at the ball, surrounding it and leaving nowhere for it to go. In the middle of the congestion, one little boy looked up and saw his mom and stepped onto her blanket to give her a big hug. These little kids were sweethearts, even if most of them couldn’t play soccer worth a damn. Drew was one of the more coordinated kids out there and Ethan wasn’t too far behind him. The best player on Ali’s team was a girl, Bianca, who was also in Drew’s class at school. 

“Let’s go maroon!!”  
“Way to go Drew!”  
“Good job offense!”  
“Run!”  
“Pass the ball!!”  
“Look up!”

The Krieger contingent cheered loudly from the sideline. Whitney had already promised Ali that she would keep Ashlyn in check when it came to berating the ref. Ali was horrified to think about her wife actually yelling at the teenage ref for anything having to do with a bunch of 5-year olds trying to play soccer. But, if she put herself in Ashlyn’s position and she felt like someone was hurting her son, she realized she would probably yell too. Much too quickly for everybody’s liking, the hour was up and the game concluded. Machado’s Pizzeria maroon team had beaten the blue team sponsored by Bates’ Autobody by a couple of goals. 

“Great game buddy” Ashlyn beamed at her son as Drew grinned and gave her a high-five. She couldn’t get over how happy he looked. “Did you have fun?”

“Yup!” he laughed as Ken hugged him and then tickled his sides. “Grandpa, stop” he giggled.

“Nice game squirt” Whitney congratulated him. “Thought you were going to get that goal there right at the end...”

“Bianca never passes” he rolled his eyes and groaned before taking a big swig of water from his official game sports bottle.

Nobody called him out on the fact that they had been playing together for a grand total of one hour, which made ‘never’ a tough word to swallow. But he was also correct. Bianca never passed the ball because as soon as she did, her teammate would lose the ball. Her team had a much better chance of scoring a goal if she just kept the ball herself and dribbled it down the field and took a shot. Many of the people standing there admiring Drew had been in Bianca’s shoes when they had been her age.

“Well, you’ll just have to make sure she knows she can trust you with the ball and then she’ll pass it to you” Deb suggested with a ruffle of his thick, dark hair. “It’s always better when there are two of you passing the ball back and forth because then the other team can’t stop you.”

“Excellent advice mom” Ali smiled broadly as she joined the group, her legs instantly surrounded and hugged by Dodge, Josie and Lily. “Why didn’t I think of that?” she teased, rolling her eyes and then bending down to hug her kids.

“We could hear you tell her to pass the ball about a thousand times Ali” Vicki chimed in. “You did great too” she patted the brunette on the back.

“Mommy can I go to Ethan’s house?” Drew asked, remembering the invitation he had received just before practice started. “His dad is showing us how to make pizza!”

“No bud, sorry” Ali shook her head. “Everybody came to watch your game and we’re all going out to lunch, remember?” she rested her hand on his sweaty head and gently rubbed it.

“But mommy...” he whined.

“No whining” Ashlyn spoke up. “Ethan’s dad can teach you to make pizza some other time. That’s the beauty of owning a pizzeria” she chuckled and picked a restless Dodge up and put him up on her shoulders.

“Up. Up. Up” Lily chanted when she saw her brother’s position.

Ken bent down and lifted the little girl up and onto his shoulders making her squeal with delight. Everybody else gathered up all of their things and the group made the walk across the field to the half-empty parking lot. That routine, those people, that soccer pitch, was going to become a constant in their lives. Drew was just the first of four of that generation of Kriegers to spend their Saturdays playing soccer. None of them were unhappy about the prospect of spending countless hours at that field cheering on whichever Krieger kid was playing. All of it felt very very right.

“You did it honey” Ashlyn leaned over her wife’s shoulder as she sat at the dressing table in the corner of their bedroom and kissed her cheek. “I’m so fucking proud of you.”

“Thanks babe” the brunette smiled softly and turned her head for a real kiss which her keeper gladly gave her. “I’m proud of me too. Now get away from me or we’ll never get out of here” she giggled and turned back to finish putting her make-up on.

The soccer and lunch afternoon had turned into an unexpected date night when Whitney and Deb offered to babysit so Ali and Ashlyn could go out for the evening. As much as Ashlyn wanted to hang out with her best friend, she knew she wouldn’t pass on the chance for a grown-up evening with her love. Ali and Ashlyn had made a pact that they wouldn’t turn down these kind of offers, no matter what. Even if they only went out for a couple of hours – they were going to take advantage of the opportunity and enjoy it. Sometimes they just went out to dinner someplace close by. Sometimes they drove around Cape Ann and talked and sang to the radio. Sometimes they drove just over to the Good Harbor Beach parking lot and climbed up onto Ashlyn’s favorite sunrise rock to have a picnic or enjoy an hour in each other’s arms watching the ocean. Sometimes they got all dolled up and went into Boston or Cambridge for a night on the town. Sometimes they made the twenty-minute drive to the big stadium-seating movie theater and relaxed into the latest blockbuster or comedy or romance. Sometimes they drove up to Rockport, as they had done so often in their time together, and walked around the little shops, eating whatever they felt like and just being close to each other. 

But one of their favorite places to go when they found themselves with an evening out of the house was the Cape Ann Cinema down by the harbor. It was a single-screen theater that showed two different films a week and alternated them throughout the day. The last showing every day was 7:30pm and, that surprise night, they had just enough time to grab a quick bite to eat at their favorite pub a few blocks away from the theater and then make the show. There were no auditorium or theater seats. The large, gently sloped space was filled with couches and love seats and comfy chairs. You could bring your own snacks and drinks in or you could buy some movie-theater style popcorn and treats from the ancient concession stand in the lobby. The place was almost never full, even on a busy Saturday night. There were other, bigger, better, flashier theaters not too far away that all the kids and young people went to. The Cape Ann Cinema was an escape for grown-ups who were interested in independent films and movies off the beaten path. Ali and Ashlyn didn’t even care what was showing half the time. They just went and watched whatever happened to be playing. The theater showed old classics sometimes too and put on different themed film festivals several times throughout the year. Even if one, or both, of them hadn’t loved the movie they still had lots to talk about after the show. The most important thing is that none of the movies were ever kid-friendly. There were serious subjects, even if handled in a comedic way. There were adult themes and some of the documentaries were sort of horrifying. But it wasn’t always about the actual film they watched. It was about engaging their brains in something that wasn’t a cartoon or focused on teaching or entertaining children. If the movie was not interesting for either one of them they would pass the time by slowly working each other up with gentle, subtle, almost chaste touches that nobody else could see. 

“It’s gonna take quite the movie to get my mind on anything other than you coaching your team today” Ashlyn winked as they ate their dinner.

“What do you mean?” Ali asked, genuinely not getting what her wife was saying.

“I mean” the blonde quirked an eyebrow, leaned forward and lowered her voice, “you were hot as hell out there” she smirked and enjoyed the surprised and then bashful look on Ali’s face. “You’ve had me feeling a certain kind of way all damned day baby.”

“Really?” Ali scrunched up her face, smiling, and blushed a little bit. “With all the kids...”

“I’m telling you” Ashlyn cut her off and gave her a penetrating stare that the brunette felt all the way in her core. “All I saw was you...coach.”

“Ashlyn” she blushed and ducked her head shyly, her voice quiet and embarrassed. 

They settled into one of the love seats in the dark theater and got comfortable. They snuggled up as they would at home, missing only the coffee table to put their feet on. Ashlyn opened her gummy bears and Ali opened her junior mints, falling back on long-time movie theater candy favorites from when they were girls. The theater was running a 2-week film festival celebrating Asian films from the 1990s and the movie that night was ‘Ju Dou’ made by Zhang Yimou in 1990 and starring Gong Li. Ali was familiar with Gong Li, the lead actress who played the title character in the film, but neither she nor Ashlyn had ever seen the movie before. It was set in a 1920s Chinese silk-dying mill and it was subtitled in English. It was a sad, tragic story about Ju Dou who had been bought as a bride by an old, bitter, wealthy man who owned the mill. The old man’s nephew lived and worked at the mill and he and Ju Dou eventually fall in love as they slave away, the only two workers dying the beautiful silk material in different vibrant colors. There weren’t a lot of subtitles to read – it was one of those slow, quiet films where pages of dialogue pass between the characters in two or three poignant looks. Both Ashlyn and Ali were mesmerized by the movie, drawn in by the forbidden love story and dazzled by the gorgeous visuals of the brightly colored silk dancing in the breeze up on fifty-foot drying poles through the open roof of part of the mill. The cinematography was just beautiful. The stark brutality of the mill owner and the manual labor it took Ju Dou and her lover to keep the place running contrasted remarkably with the delicate and colorful silk hanging everywhere.

They talked animatedly about the movie as they drove home, both surprised at how erotic the love scenes had managed to be given the conditions and setting. It would turn out to be a film they both thought about often. Ashlyn was inspired to paint and she knew it was a direct result of the movie. But the painting could wait. The ache she had felt all day for her beautiful brunette had intensified ten-fold while they spent 98 minutes holding each other in the dark theater.

“Unnnhhhh...fuck...ohhh...so good...” Ali groaned out from underneath her wife’s sharply undulating body.

Ashlyn was laying on top of the brunette, wrapped up tightly by Ali’s arms around her shoulders, and burying the strap-on deep into her with each thrust of her hips. Ali held their bodies close together but the keeper had her hands squeezed in between them from the sides, palming each of Ali’s bouncing breasts and pinching her nipples as they moved together. Ashlyn nipped at her wife’s earlobe and sucked on her neck, breathing hotly against her moist skin in between kisses and licks. Ali’s knees were bent up and her hips as open as possible to get the best angle and feel the most pleasure each time Ashlyn pumped the dildo into her wet and wanting pussy. Her legs flopped loosely on either side of the blonde’s hips, because Ali was so far gone she didn’t have the will to even hold them up anymore. They were both panting and sweating a bit as they kept the rhythm fast and tight. The base of the strap-on pressed down on Ali’s aching clit at this angle, giving her exquisite pressure on her sensitive nub the whole time her hot center was being filled by her favorite toy with the wonderful knobs touching her in even more places. She was close to her release and Ashlyn knew it. The keeper could feel greater resistance on the dildo as Ali’s silken walls started to press in on it, the pressure sending jolts into her own clit from the back of the harness. Ali’s face and neck were pink, flushed from all of the titillating sensations her keeper was giving her.

“God you’re gorgeous” Ashlyn panted out as she arched her back just a bit to get a slightly more upward angle with her last few thrusts. “So fucking beautiful... fuck I love you.” Her words were hot and breathy and right next to Ali’s ear. “Come for me baby...I want to feel you shake in my arms...”

“Oh God...” Ali gasped and held on to her wife’s strong shoulders even tighter. “Oh my God... Ash-lyn...” she whimpered and squeezed her eyes closed.

“Fuck Ali...” the keeper husked out, desire dripping from her lips as she bit down on the top of Ali’s shoulder and pinched both nipples at the same time.

“Yesssssssssss!!!” the brunette shouted as her body went rigid for a second and then convulsed and shook vigorously.

“Yes baby...” Ashlyn moaned and slowed her thrusting way down. She rolled them over, effortlessly, so she was holding Ali on top of her with her arms wrapped around her waist and her shoulders. The keeper held her close, but not too tightly, so the brunette could breath as her orgasm rocked through her body. “Mmmmmm, you’re so amazing Al...your body is just incredible...you’re gorgeous and so fucking sexy” she growled out, her face covered in soft, brunette locks.

Ashlyn stopped moving her hips and just breathed with her wife, letting their chests rise and fall together as their heart rates came back down to normal. She moved her hands around Ali’s back and ass, rubbing soft, gentle circles as she went. As long as she lived she would never get over the fact that her body could make Ali’s respond like that. The moments she spent like this, sweaty and wrapped around the love of her life’s naked body, were the absolute best of all. Slowly she felt the brunette start to shift her position and tilt her head to the side. Ali flopped her head over onto the pillow next her wife’s head and brought a hand up to move the hair off of her face, as well as Ashlyn’s.

“Wow” she exhaled as she let her hand fall back down to the bed, rubbing her fingertips on Ashlyn’s bicep. “Mmmmmm I love that so much...when we’re close like this and you’re right here with me” she breathed out and smiled lazily with her eyes closed. “I just want to stay like this forever.”

“Sounds perfect to me my love” Ashlyn agreed and pressed a kiss into her wife’s smiling lips.

Ali giggled at the unexpected contact as her eyes fluttered open. She brought her hand back up and softly caressed her keeper’s cheek with the back of her fingers, staring into beautiful hazel eyes that looked like they were actually twinkling right at that moment.

“I love you Ash” her words were full of emotion and meaning and she brought their lips together in a deep and passionate kiss that left them both breathless and hungry for more.

The brunette kissed her wife again, aggressively shoving her tongue into her mouth and owning it. Ashlyn moaned and tilted her hips responsively, forgetting that the strap-on was still buried deep inside Ali’s core. The keeper’s eyes flew open when she heard her wife squeal and then chuckle against her lips.

“Sorry baby” she smiled apologetically and patted Ali’s ass to comfort her. “Do you want me to take it out yet?”

“Yeah, but only because it’s in my way” the brunette grinned lasciviously and kissed her keeper again while lifting her hips up and putting her weight on her knees. “I want to stay close to you, sexy” she purred.

Ashlyn reached down and pulled the dildo all the way out but before she could move to take it out of the harness or take the harness off, Ali shifted her body down just a bit. The brunette moaned as she put her lips around one of Ashlyn’s perfect pink nipples and started flicking it and sucking on it. She kept her body on top of Ashlyn’s as much as possible while shifting to the left and stroking her keeper’s drenched folds with her right hand. They both moaned loudly and Ashlyn dug her fingers into the top of the brunette’s ass and arched her back.

“So fucking wet...”

“Jesus baby, oh God please don’t tease me. I think I’ll die” Ashlyn begged in a low, throaty voice.

Ali had no intention of teasing her worked-up wife. She wanted to feel Ashlyn’s body explode in her hands almost more than the blonde wanted her release. Ali played with her pussy lips for a minute, just long enough to spread them out and make sure she had a nice, clear path to her ultimate destination. She switched to the other nipple and wrapped her left arm underneath her wife to keep their bodies close together.

“Fuck you feel good” the brunette groaned as her lust continued to skyrocket. She pushed her two middle fingers into Ashlyn’s hot, pulsing center and felt her own body shiver at the incredible sensation. “Fuck...” she whispered, mouth still around a stiffening nipple.

“Oh yeah...shit, that’s it...mmmmmmm...” the keeper moaned out and tilted her hips up.

Ali started to pump her fingers at a strong, medium speed as she enjoyed her wife’s body writhing beneath her. She used her teeth to gently nip at the underside of her keeper’s soft breast and sucked so hard she knew it would leave a bruise. Ashlyn brought her free hand up to the back of Ali’s head and pressed her fingertips into her scalp, giving her a brief massage and she got more and more lost in the orgasm that was starting to build way down deep.

“Mmmmmmmm...I love having these babies back” the brunette mumbled against the soft skin of Ashlyn’s other breast before dragging her teeth across the nipple and then soothing it with her tongue. “Mmmmm...”

Ashlyn hissed at the sensation and then groaned into the tender mercy of Ali’s tongue. She began to play with the brunette hair in her hand and then finally applied pressure to the back of Ali’s head when she couldn’t stand it anymore. She couldn’t get her wife’s mouth close enough to her skin. She wanted to feel those lips and that tongue everywhere, all at once and she groaned again in frustration and pleasure.

“Ali...” she exhaled softly, almost like a prayer.

The brunette could feel her keeper’s body getting more and more excited by the touches and tugs she was giving it. She upped her thrusting pace and started curling her fingers up every third or fourth stroke, making Ashlyn whimper and rock her hips to try and meet them. The blonde’s rippling pussy walls were starting to tighten around her fingers and her breathing had become ragged and desperate. 

“Touch your clit” she husked out, looking up at Ashlyn’s face through darkened eyes and finding the same look in the lidded hazel ones staring back at her.

The keeper moved her left hand down and started rubbing her clit, already wet and ready. She had to reach around the strap-on, still in place, which made it more difficult, but she found a way. Ali felt a tremble travel the length of her wife’s body and redoubled her efforts both with her fingers and her mouth. She moaned when she felt another wave of Ashlyn’s juices soak her fingers and wished her mouth was there instead. But, no, this was how the brunette wanted it. Skin to skin, body to body, close together and moving in the same rhythm. It was a dizzying sensation and it made her skin tingle every place it touched Ashlyn’s.

“Unnhhhhh...Jesus...unnnhhhh...” the keeper grunted out as her whole body rocked to Ali’s fast, deep thrusts. “Yesss baby...fuck that’s so good...”

It only took another minute of all of that syncopated pleasure to push the blonde over the edge. She came hard and shouted Ali’s name as she held her tightly to her chest with both hands while her body twitched and shook and spasmed. 

“Yes babe...yes...” Ali managed to mumble against her wife’s chest. Ashlyn held her face so tightly that she could barely move her lips to speak. And that was just fine with the brunette.

The keeper rode her orgasm out as Ali slowed her fingers down to a gentle, light stroke. The brunette’s desire to taste her wife’s pussy was overwhelming but she felt Ashlyn pull her up and the idea of being held in her arms at that moment was more powerful than the pull of her sweet juices. In a sweet compromise, Ali let Ashlyn pull her up so they were chest to chest again but she moved her head to the right of her keeper’s. She brought her right hand up to her own mouth and happily licked all of the blonde’s juices off of her fingers, moaning contentedly as she did so. Ashlyn chuckled, breathlessly, when she realized what her wife was doing.

“Taste good baby?” she teased as she spread her long fingers out and moved them all around Ali’s back and ass again. 

“MmmHmmm...delicious” the brunette chuckled as she finished up her treat. 

She lifted her head up and moved her face so it was an inch above her beautiful keeper’s. They exchanged a loving look and a shy smile and brought their lips together in a sweet, romantic kiss. They kissed again but when Ashlyn winced, her wife pulled back, concerned.

“I gotta take this thing off...” she groaned and reached down to release the buckles on the harness.

“Sorry I just couldn’t wait to touch you babe” Ali giggled as she pressed warm kisses up and down her wife’s neck. “Do you want me to help?”

“No, I got it. I want you to stay right here, in my arms” she squeezed her with the arm that wasn’t undoing buckles.

“I love that you’re the clingy one tonight” Ali cooed into Ashlyn’s ear. “It’s usually me and I feel kind of silly when I do it” she confessed as she lifted her weight up for a minute so Ashlyn could pull the harness off of her once and for all. “But I love it when you do it” she lowered her body back down onto her keeper and nibbled her ear lobe.

“I love when you do it too. It feels great” the blonde replied and rolled them onto their sides, sliding her thigh up between Ali’s legs and pulling her even closer.

They wrapped themselves up together and made out for a long time, getting lost in the kisses and the feeling of soft, sated skin under their fingers. It had been a very good night that had only gotten better. Their second round, strap-on sex was a nice bonus that they didn’t always get the chance to enjoy.

“Thank you for my favorite date honey” Ali said softly as they got sleepier. 

“Thank you for being a cheap date” the keeper teased, and earned a playful swat from her wife. “Ok, ok” she chuckled and grinned at her girl. “I couldn’t resist. You set me up perfectly.”

“Whatever” Ali rolled her eyes, only half-joking. “See if I try to be sweet and soft with you again any time soon.”

“Oh, don’t say that Al” Ashlyn squeezed her tightly and kissed her lips again. “I was only joking” she pulled back until they were nose to nose and looking into each other’s eyes. “I know what dinner and a movie means. I remember. I think about that conversation every time we go on a date actually.”

“You do?” Ali raised her eyebrows in surprise.

“Sure I do. I thought you were crazy at the time” she chuckled as Ali buried her face into her neck and snuggled closer, even clingier after Ashlyn’s touching revelation. “I couldn’t believe that was your idea of a perfect date. It seemed so lame...” she felt the brunette’s body tense up at her criticism and quickly finished her thought, “at the time it seemed like you were aiming kind of low. But now I get it” she kissed Ali’s head. “It really is perfect and I can finally appreciate your wisdom and forward thinking.”

“Nice save babe” Ali mumbled, moving closer and closer to sleep.

“Don’t fall asleep yet sweetheart” the keeper leaned her head back. “You have to get dressed first.”

Ali whined but sat up so Ashlyn could help her get her pajamas on. She kissed the brunette as she helped her back under the covers and then got dressed herself. She cleaned and put away the strap-on, enjoying the new memories they had just made with it, and then unlocked the bedroom doors before climbing back into bed. Ali hummed adorably when her keeper’s body got into place and she could curl up into it. She never opened her tired eyes. Just as Ashlyn was about to drift off to sleep she heard her wife’s tired but happy voice.

“Dinner and a movie, babe. The best.”


	15. Pretty in Pictures

Ashlyn’s Nike ad campaign had been a huge hit so far that year. The company had been releasing one picture at a time since the big debut party in NYC at the beginning of February. There were print ads and billboards and ads in the subway and on the sides of buses in major cities all around the world. The world. Ashlyn put the same picture out on all of her social media, as did Knight-Harris, to further amplify the hit. There were ten official photos and Nike released one every three weeks so that the last one hit the public at the end of August. The second wave of the campaign was geared towards the NFL season and, although Nike knew Ashlyn might not be what a lot of the NFL audience wanted, three knew pictures were released that were football specific. One a month in September, October and November. One of these pictures, the October one, was of Ashlyn twirling a football on her palm with a scantily clad young model wrapped around her other side, cheerleader pom-pom in hand. Ashlyn wore a new Nike fashion outfit and looked smoking hot as she stood there with her feet planted wide and her chin up. The keeper’s free hand, at the end of her tattoo-sleeved left arm, was planted squarely on and grabbing a generous handful of the nubile woman’s ass. The smirk on Ashlyn’s face was what made the photo so good. She sold it and people loved it, even the NFL fans. 

There was also a much-anticipated behind the scenes video Nike released at the end of August, just to make sure they still had everybody’s attention. The video still made everybody look glamorous and it teased the upcoming NFL themed photos. It also gave fans another glimpse of Ashlyn’s personality. It showed her, specifically, being considerate and almost shy with the cheerleader model during outtakes from that shoot. It was remarkable to watch her go from her sweet, thoughtful, respectful self between shots to the cocky, confident stud smirking in the photograph. Even though all ten of the first pictures were beautiful and showed the keeper in a multitude of different lights, thoughtful, charming, vulnerable, laughing, brooding, and others, it was the October NFL picture with the cheerleader that everybody talked about. 

Ashlyn made a point to talk about the Mental Health Initiative every chance she got and that meant squeezing in a plug for it whenever anybody asked her about any of her Nike pictures. She figured if she was going to have to put up with the invasion of privacy she may as well use it to promote something that was vitally important to her. While she was out fulfilling her duties as a Breakers ambassador she sometimes got asked by a local tv news reporter for a comment on her big year or her busy summer broadcasting the Olympics. After the October NFL picture hit the public there was nowhere for the blonde to hide. It wasn’t that she was embarrassed by it or ashamed of it. She had eagerly signed on to work with Nike on the campaign and she hadn’t forgotten that either. It was just that people asking her the questions didn’t have any boundaries and they certainly didn’t respect hers. They would find her at a Breakers game, with her family no less, and ask her if her kids were ok with the racy photo. Ashlyn showed the patience of a saint, with lots of coaching and encouragement from her agent and wife, and just laughed the questions off with a friendly smile. 

She was in North Carolina the second weekend in October to actually call the NWSL playoff game between Vancouver and North Carolina on Saturday October 12th. It was the first time she ever got to be the color commentator for a live game and she was nervous as hell. Ali told her that if she got nervous or wasn’t feeling like she was in control of what she was saying that she should just be quiet. Just stop talking and listen to her broadcast partner and watch the game in front of her. It was still just soccer. Ashlyn had done a really good job and was pleased with her performance, at least until she could get home and watch and critique it. She hadn’t made any huge mistakes or embarrassed herself so she considered it a success. While she was in North Carolina some local press started asking her questions about the Nike photo and being pretty aggressive about it. One reporter went so far as to ask Ashlyn if her marriage was ok because there was no way her wife would have allowed her to pose for that photo. Ashlyn was so shocked by the question that she just smiled and waved and moved along without even answering it.

The same thing happened the following weekend, Saturday October 19th, when she was doing the sideline reporting for the Runner up game that began Championship week. Championship Week was in Orlando that year and Ashlyn brought the whole family with her, staying at Carol and Tammye’s beach house as usual. They both felt guilty taking Drew out of kindergarten for a week but decided he would survive. The questions about the state of her marriage kept coming with local reporters trying to get a response any way they could. When the runner up game was over and she was leaving the field after doing several postgame interviews, Ashlyn heard the question again.

“Ashlyn! Ashlyn! Can you tell us if your marriage is in trouble or not? Your fans really want to know!”

She was more aggravated than usual and had had just about enough. But she swallowed hard and smiled instead of saying what she really wanted to say. 

“We never see you with your wife anymore Ashlyn. Are you two still together?”

“Listen” she stopped her walk towards the tunnel of the stadium and spun on her heel towards the question. She realized she was about to tell them exactly where they could shove their stupid questions but she caught herself at the last possible second. “I don’t know what you guys are trying to do here, but my wife and I are just fine, thank you” she smiled broadly and waved as she entered the tunnel and disappeared.

It was her 39th birthday and when Ali took her out for dinner later that evening to celebrate she found her keeper was still bothered by it.

“It just kills me that they can say whatever they want, posing it as a question, and expect me to answer them” she shook her head, frustrated.

“Well, there’s the whole freedom of speech thing that we’re pretty fond of here in this country” Ali chuckled. “And, it worked” she shrugged. “They got you to stop and answer, didn’t they?”

“You’re not helping.”

“I’m sorry honey” Ali frowned and reached across the table and took her keeper’s hand and squeezed. “I’m not saying it will be easy. At all. But you should just ignore them until this whole thing dies down a bit.”

“What if I don’t want to ignore them” Ashlyn lifted her eyes. “And why the hell wasn’t anybody here to see us going out to a nice, romantic birthday dinner tonight?” she looked around the fancy restaurant they were sitting in and half expected a flash bulb to go off in her face.

“What do you want to do Ash?”

“Maybe I want to tell them that we’re fine and answer their question” she answered and waited nervously for the brunette’s reply.

“Well we can always release our own statement if you want, through K-H of course” she clarified quickly. “Or you could be a little more subtle and post something on social media so all of your fans will know we’re still madly in love” she winked.

Championship Week was busy for both women as they did their jobs and still managed to take care of their kids with family help, of course. About halfway through the week when the questions kept coming, the keeper found a picture of the six of them from their Disney World trip and posted it on her social media. It was a sweet picture and Ali and Ashlyn both looked happy in it. They all did, except for the twins who both looked a little confused by everything. Ashlyn posted the pic with this hashtag: #myeverything 

And for a little birthday treat, Ali set up the camera that night in their bedroom. She set the timer and, after a few tries, managed to get the pose just right. For nobody’s consumption but their own, they staged the Nike NFL October position with Ashlyn in a much more casual Nike outfit and Ali completely naked and playing the part of the cheerleader. You couldn’t see her breasts because they were pressed into Ashlyn’s side and covered by her own arm as it reached across her keeper’s chest. And you couldn’t see her ass because Ashlyn’s large hand covered most of it and it was a side shot to begin with. 

“That looks awesome!” the blonde enthused as they sat on the bed and looked through the shots until they found the one that looked the best.

“You look awesome, birthday girl” Ali cooed into her wife’s ear, not even looking at the photo and totally turned on by the racy photo shoot.

“This was the best idea Ali, thank you” Ashlyn replied seriously. “Now it’s truly our picture and that’s what I’ll think of anytime somebody asks me about it again. It’ll definitely keep the smile on my face” she grinned and then moved in to capture Ali’s lips in a deep, soulful kiss that led to an entirely different kind of celebration.

When Portland faced North Carolina for the NWSL Championship that Saturday, October 26th, Ashlyn did her job and she did it very well. As usual. North Carolina won and the stadium, filled with more NC fans than Pacific NW fans, exploded into ecstatic cheers. It was an electric atmosphere and the live broadcast was watched by the most fans that had ever tuned into the Championship game before. Ashlyn pressed her finger to the earpiece in her ear, trying to hear what her colleagues were asking her from the booth. It was so loud down on the field that it was nearly impossible for her to hear them. They were all thanking each other for their hard work on Championship Week and all throughout the NWSL season. They had about ten more minutes to kill and Jenn Hildreth decided to just take the bull by the horns and try to help her friend and colleague out.

“Ashlyn you’ve done a great job for us all season and especially these last few weeks with the playoffs and Championship Week...”

“Aw thanks Jenn, it’s been great. We’ve got a wonderful team here at Lifetime TV” the keeper smiled into the camera.

“We know you’ve been hounded down here all week about some rumors” she carefully broached the subject. “Is there anything you want to let the fans know, just to set the record straight once and for all?”

“Oh, umm, yeah I guess that’d be a great way to do this” she smiled nervously at first but then found her courage and spoke clearly and from the heart. “I love the Nike ad campaign I did that started this year and I know everybody’s talking about the latest picture from it. And I just want to let you all know that my wife and I are happier than we’ve ever been. We’ve got four little kids at home and our life is full and wonderful and nobody has to worry about us at all.”

“Ok, you heard it here first folks” Jenn laughed. “I hope that will help you get some relief from all the crazy speculation Ashlyn. And, for the record, there are a whole bunch of us who know you and your wife and we can definitely corroborate this. Just let us know if you need us Ash” she offered, only half teasing.

//

The Harris family spent as much time as they could during Championship week with the visiting Kriegers. The florist shop was doing well enough now that Beth had been able to hire a full-time employee who actually knew what they were doing and made the business better and her own life a little easier. Mike Harris still worked there and made deliveries for them and helped with anything else that was within his skill set. He was not a flower arranger and didn’t even try. But he was surprised at how much knowledge he had picked up over the past few years while working there. He was able to impress Lydia, his girlfriend, by identifying a lot of different flowers as they walked through parks or visited one of the beautiful botanical gardens in the area. Things were going well for the Harrises and they knew enough to be grateful for it. Chris was still managing the surf shop at the beach and seemed to really enjoy it. He didn’t make a million dollars but he didn’t have to deal with too much job stress either. The toughest part of his job was the surfing lessons. That was a very lucrative part of the business and it had to be done professionally and on time. The scheduling was really the only difficult part of the job for him and Tammye tried to help him when she could. She was still working as a full-time temp for the same company but she was going to cut back on her hours more. She had thought about retiring and taking some part-time job near the beach just to be closer to the grandkids and have more time with them, but her company didn’t want to lose her. So they proposed that she stay with them and just cut back her hours. Starting in January she would officially be working part-time, three days a week, for the temp company. That meant she could help Chris out with the scheduling at the surf shop the other two days. 

“So how was the first day of kindergarten?” Beth asked with a knowing smile as she sat next to Ali in the beach chair. She could see Ashlyn and Carol down by the water with Johnny, Drew and Lizzy but kept her eye on Ali’s face while she waited for her reply. “How hard did you cry?”

“Oh God” the brunette chuckled and rolled her eyes. “I really didn’t think it would be that big of a deal, you know? I mean, he was already in preschool and that felt official enough. He was already ‘in school’ to me.” She paused and gazed down at her oldest son running into the surf and getting knocked backwards by the waves, laughing with his mama the whole time. Beth had brought her kids over after school and Ali’s youngest kids were still napping which afforded them this nice, quiet time. “But damn, when we ever walked him up to the elementary school for his first day of kindergarten...” she shook her head emotionally and paused again. “I bawled my eyes out. I couldn’t even make it back to the truck. As soon as I turned my back to the school I burst into tears and Ash had to make sure I walked the right direction.”

“Yeah, it’s tough” Beth reached over and patted her sister-in-law’s forearm as it rested on the arm of the beach chair. “I don’t know why it’s so different from preschool either. Same thing happened to me.”

“It was just so...official. The big brick elementary school with the bells that rang to tell the kids when to line up to go in to class. The bigger kids looked so big, 5th graders are big!” she said wide-eyed as she reached for her water bottle and took a swig.

“So he’ll be there at that same school until he goes to middle school?”

“Yeah, it’ll be nice having them all in one place I think, for the few years it’ll actually happen. We figured it out – there will be two years when all four of our kids will be in that same school. When the twins are in kindergarten Drew will be in 4th grade. So those two years...”

“Wow, the twins in kindergarten...” Beth paused and smiled thoughtfully. “How in the world can that be? They were just tiny babies, like, yesterday.”

“Don’t remind me!” Ali laughed. “Thankfully that’s still four years away. Whew!”

They chatted about Johnny and Lizzy and all of the Harris goings-on for several minutes. They both agreed that Tammye and Carol should just hurry up and get married already but understood why both women might be hesitant to take that step. They joked about how Chris was turning into his father more and more every day. And then the conversation turned more serious as they both trained their eyes on the people they loved so much down by the water.

“So what’s going on with the ovarian cancer stuff?” Beth asked quietly without turning to look at the brunette. “If you don’t mind me asking.”

“No I don’t mind” Ali replied softly and warmly. “There’s not too much to tell really. Did Ash talk to Chris?”

“Yeah, she was pretty upset when you guys first found out about the family history and everything. I think she was more surprised than anything. That’s what Chris said anyway. I think she just needed to be scared with someone for a little bit and she didn’t want to put that on you right then.”

“I’m glad she talked to him. I knew she was upset but she wouldn’t go there with me, not yet anyway. She seemed to be ok so I figured she had talked to Mattie or Whitney about it. But I should have known it was Chris. I love your husband” Ali’s voice was kind and warm but her face was serious as it studied the shoreline.

“So the test results were negative” Beth pushed on, wanting to know the answer to her question. “That’s great news, but what does that mean?”

“Well, the BRCA-1 and BRCA-2 tests both came back negative and that is great. That’s the best we can hope for right now. All of us, my mom, her cousin, both of her cousins’ daughters and me, we all got good news on those tests. But those tests only check for the cancer that they know to look for. It doesn’t mean we don’t have a gene mutation that will give us all ovarian cancer someday. It just means that we don’t have any of the gene mutations that they know about right now. So it’s good news for sure, but...”

“You’ve got an aunt and a grandmother who died from ovarian cancer and that’s too much of a coincidence to just believe you’re completely in the clear” Beth stated matter of factly. “Fuck.”

“Exactly” Ali breathed out. 

“So what now?”

“There are a few different options and I’m not sure what everybody’s going to do, honestly. One of Aunt Di’s daughters wants to have her ovaries removed, just to be safe. She’s not going to have any more babies so she doesn’t see a reason to keep them and risk it.”

“Wow...”

“But her other daughter is still young enough where she might want another baby so she’s not going to go that route. She’s going to take the vigilant route, that’s what my doctor calls it” Ali sighed. 

“What happens there?”

“Well, because we have this family history and are at a greater risk, the insurance companies will pay for periodic ultrasounds so they can try and look for anything suspicious and catch it as early as possible.”

“How often is periodic?”

“That depends on the risk, but ours is pretty high so we can get one every three months” Ali explained and then was quiet for a couple of minutes.

Both women sat there, happy to be watching the cute show down at the water’s edge but frightened about the conversation they were having.

“What are you going to do? Do you know yet?”

“I got my results back at the beginning of August, right when my mom’s cousin Maria died – which was creepy and freaked me right the fuck out” she confessed and looked down at her lap, fiddling with the water bottle in her hands. “I’ve met with the oncologist twice since then to talk about the options and I’m still really torn. I mean, I’m not having more kids. That’s not even an issue and it hasn’t been since Josie. But if I have my ovaries removed then it’ll mess up all my hormones and I’m not really sure what else. Believe it or not, there’s a lot of debate among really smart people about how much of your reproductive organs need to be removed to try and prevent ovarian cancer.”

“You’re kidding? Not just your ovaries?”

“Nope. Some specialists say you need to take the fallopian tubes too. Some say you need to take out even more. It’s really crazy Beth, they don’t know what the fuck causes it and that’s the honest truth.”

“And there’s not a test for it, like a mammogram tests for breast cancer, right?”

“Right” Ali nodded. “The best you can do is get the transvaginal ultrasounds and there’s a blood test that looks for a certain protein in the blood. Women with ovarian cancer have high levels of this certain protein so they figure if you keep your eye on that it might help too.”

“That’s it?”

“Yep. Pretty fucking frustrating, isn’t it?” the brunette smiled ruefully at Beth and let out a clipped chuckle. “The worst thing is that even if you have your ovaries and whatever else removed, you can still get ovarian cancer. So there’s no real selling point for getting them removed, at least not in my opinion anyway.”

“God, that’s crazy Ali” Beth’s face was creased with worry as she looked at the brunette next to her. “I’m really sorry you have to deal with this.”

“It’s funny, well, odd – not really funny. But if mom hadn’t taken that trip to Italy and started talking with her cousin about Aunt Jo we wouldn’t know anything about this. And I wouldn’t be sitting here with a pit in my stomach worrying about the best way to stay alive and take care of my family” she took a breath and steadied her nerves. “Hell, we might not have a gene mutation at all and it could just be a coincidence that both Aunt Jo and her daughter Maria died from ovarian cancer. How funny would that be?” she chuckled quietly. “But, I also might be dead in ten years because I didn’t know to look for it” she shrugged. “So, ten years of ignorant bliss versus, hopefully, forty or fifty years with more tests and more worry and maybe some surgery and wonky hormones...” She kept her eyes trained on Drew and Ashlyn as the keeper bent down to Drew’s level and pointed up at Ali and Beth. The boy’s face lit up and he started to run towards them as Ashlyn turned back to Johnny and Lizzy and Carol. “I know what my decision would be every time. I’ll take the worry if it gets me even one more day with them.”

//

The din inside the airport shuttle van that afternoon was giving Ashlyn a headache. The car company had picked the keeper and her family up at Logan airport in Boston and was now a couple of blocks away from the big old house. Drew was trying to talk to Ali who was trying to get Lily to stop crying. Dodge was just being loud and making noises because he liked the way they sounded and Josie was singing a song as she looked out the window. Nobody was doing anything wrong so she couldn’t very well tell them to be quiet. Well, Dodge didn’t need to be so loud, but that was just Dodge. The keeper could hear the frustration in her wife’s voice and knew Ali was losing her patience with the situation too. What was Lily even crying about? They had chosen to divide and conquer, as usual, and the brunette was in the middle of the front row of the passenger van with Lily to her left and Drew to her right. Ashlyn was similarly situated in the middle row with Josie to her left and Dodge to her right with all of their luggage and kids stuff packed in behind them.

“Dodge, honey, will you please use your indoor voice?” Ali’s frazzled voice finally called out to the boy sitting in the row behind her. Not surprisingly, he didn’t hear her. “Ash, Ashlyn” she turned her body sideways to get her wife’s attention. “Can you do something?”

The hazy headache became more intense and the keeper winced, leaning forward and putting her hand on Ali’s back as she shook the pain off.

“What’s the matter with Lily?” Ashlyn asked, leaning closer to her wife so she could hear her answer.

“I don’t know” the brunette sighed. “I think she’s just tired but” she shrugged, “I don’t know. Drew, just wait a minute buddy, ok? I’m talking to mama right now.”

“Dodger” Ashlyn put her hand over her son’s mouth and got his attention at the same time. “Quieter, please. Use your indoor voice” she quirked an eyebrow at him and then smiled as she felt him smile underneath her hand. “I mean it. Everybody’s too loud in here right now.”

Thankfully, the van pulled into the driveway a few minutes later and they all tumbled out of it with whines and groans and more and more questions while Lily continued to cry.

“What day is it?”  
“Mama can we go to the beach?”  
“Where doggies?”  
“Snack?”  
“What’s mommy doing?”

It took almost twenty minutes to get the kids into the house and situated. Lily finally stopped crying when Ashlyn plopped her down on the living room couch with some juice in her favorite sippy cup and a DVR’d episode of Paw Patrol on the tv. The keeper felt like she could breathe again once her little girl stopped crying. She and Ali moved around the first floor getting the kids what they needed and helping Josie use the potty. Ali had paid and tipped the driver and he helped her bring all of the luggage into the mudroom while Ashlyn took the first pass at settling the kids. A few minutes after he left and the two moms shared a tired hug, bemoaning the trials of travelling with four little kids, they heard a car door shut in the driveway.

“Are we expecting someone?” Ashlyn asked as they both looked at the mudroom door, not ending the hug just yet.

“Just my dad with the dogs” the brunette replied and rested her head on her wife’s shoulder. “Can we please just order pizza for dinner tonight?” she whined.

“Jesus, don’t you start whining too” Ashlyn flinched. “I’ll really lose my mind” she rolled her eyes and chuckled. “And yes, that sounds good baby” she kissed her wife’s head.

A minute later the mudroom door opened and Ken came in with Persey and Fred wagging their entire bodies spastically. Ashlyn bent down to greet them and then moved with them into the front living room to make sure they greeted the kids gently and vice versa.

“Thanks so much dad” Ali hugged her father and kissed his cheek.

“Anytime princess, anytime” he smiled at her as they separated. His eyes went wide at all of the luggage in the mudroom. “Wow.”

“Yeah” Ali chuckled. “Remember that time you guys helped me take Drew across the country for Ashlyn’s Championship game in Portland and I complained about how hard that was?” she paused and raised her eyebrows. “I take it all back” she laughed. “I didn’t realize how easy I had it.”

“So, who’s your visitor and why is she sitting on your front porch?” Ken asked casually.

“What are you talking about?” Ali frowned in confusion. “We don’t have any visitors.”

“Ok, well you’d better tell that to the young lady sitting on your front porch then” he chuckled and moved into the front living room to look out the front window and show his daughter what he was talking about. “See?”

Sure enough, there was a girl who looked like she was high school aged sitting on their front porch steps with her elbows on her knees and her chin in her hands. She had earbuds in and looked like every other high school kid you could picture in your head. 

“What’s going on?” Ashlyn asked, walking up behind Ken and Ali and looking out the front window with them.

“Do you know this girl?” Ali stepped aside so her wife could get a good look.

“No, should I?”

“I don’t know” Ali sighed. “I’m just trying to figure out what she’s doing on our porch.”

“Well I’ll go find out...” the keeper moved towards the front door but her wife stopped her with a hand on her arm.

“No, I’ll do it” the brunette said definitively and moved past Ashlyn. “Just keep the kids inside.”

Ashlyn looked at Ken who was already following his daughter to the door.

“I’m on it” he nodded with a smile.

The girl was about 14, Ali estimated as she took a minute on the porch to assess the situation. She wore jeans, worn-out high-top basketball sneakers, one of Ashlyn’s most eccentric t-shirt designs, and a faded flannel shirt. Her hair was long and very dark but she had it up in a half ponytail / half bun. Her make-up was dark, almost goth-like, complete with black lipstick and black fingernails. She had a pierced nose with a medium sized hoop in it and pierced ears with skull earrings covering most of her lobes. There was a ratty army green canvas messenger style bag next to her on the porch and she was still sitting in the same position – her chin in her hands. She didn’t look dangerous and she didn’t look like she was in need of any medical attention or anything. She looked perfectly fine, other than being bored and maybe uncomfortable as she sat next to the post on the top step of the porch, her feet down on the first of the three steps. Ali went a little wide of her position and stepped down the steps by the opposite post, touching the girl lightly on the shoulder as she did so.

“Hey there” the brunette started the interaction and quickly removed her hand, putting them both on her hips as she stood and waited for the girl to greet her.

Ken stayed where he was on the porch, between the girl and the house. It seemed like a harmless situation but he wasn’t taking chances with his grandkids inside. For all he knew, this girl had some sort of weapon in her bag and meant the family harm. 

“Hi” Ali spoke again and smiled cautiously as the teenager sat up straighter and pulled the buds out of her ears, fumbling with her phone to silence the music.

“Ummm, hi” she mumbled as she looked at Ali in front of her and then looked over her shoulder where she saw Ken as well. “Is Ashlyn here?”

“Are you hurt honey?” Ali ignored the question because she didn’t really want to answer it. “What are you doing here?” she asked carefully.

“I came to see Ashlyn, this is her house, she lives here” she explained with a smile to the keeper’s wife as if Ali didn’t know any of the information. 

“What makes you think that?” 

The teenager rattled off six different social media posts that Ashlyn had made over the past few years that had brought her to this address. She explained that she didn’t know the exact address but she had been walking around the neighborhood looking for the driveway or garage or house that she recognized from Ashlyn’s different pictures. Ali knew that her keeper had been much more careful about posting pictures or videos that revealed details about their address since just after Drew was born. But this girl had pieced together snippets of things from dozens of pictures and come up with a ‘view’ of the driveway and the garage and the house that was frighteningly accurate. Ali wasn’t going to confirm anything.

“What’s your name honey?”

“Frankie” she replied easily. She didn’t seem nervous or upset at all which was really sort of unsettling. She seemed perfectly fine that she was sitting on Ashlyn’s porch, waiting to talk with her. “My parents call me Frannie but I like Frankie” some anger flashed across her face when she mentioned her parents.

“Well it’s nice to meet you Frankie” Ali stuck out her hand to shake the girl’s. “I’m Ali and I live here and I’d like to help you get back home, ok?”

“But I need to talk to Ashlyn” she frowned and started rummaging around in her bag and muttering to herself.

Both Ken and his daughter stiffened a little bit, afraid of what would come out of the bag. But Frankie’s hands finally emerged with some artwork of the keeper. 

“That’s not going to happen honey, I’m sorry” Ali answered matter-of-factly. She didn’t mean it to come out brusquely, but the protector in her was fully on display and there was no way she was letting her wife come out here. 

“But it’s really important!” the girl’s voice rose in anguish and her eyes got big and a little crazy. “I need to talk to Ashlyn!”

“Frankie, listen” Ali’s voice was warmer now, much more sympathetic. “Why don’t you tell me what’s going on? How did you get here? Where do you live?”

“No, I need...”

“Hey” Ali heard her favorite voice in the world coming from just behind Ken. “I’m here kiddo. I’m right here” Ashlyn spoke softly and was surprised when the girl jumped to her feet and immediately hugged the keeper around the waist, burying her head in her shoulder and squeezing her tightly. “Whoa” Ashlyn put her arms up, surprised by the contact as both Ken and Ali took steps towards her to intervene. “It’s ok. It’s alright” she patted the teenager on the back and pulled one of her arms off of her waist.

Ashlyn met her wife’s icy glare and tried to soothe her with a smile but it wasn’t working. 

“Look, you’re making everybody a little nervous” the keeper chuckled as she tried to separate herself from the girl. “Let’s sit down for a minute, ok?”

“Oh yeah, sure” she replied and sat down in her spot again with Ashlyn sitting next to her but keeping about a foot of space between them.

There was a loud yell from inside the front living room and then Lily was crying again. Ali didn’t want to leave her wife with this strange girl but she couldn’t expect her dad to go in there and deal with the four over-tired, travelled-out kids either. She gave him a pleading look and he nodded in understanding as she walked past him and went back into the house.

“So, Frankie, that’s your name right?”

“Yeah” she smiled sadly. Now that Ashlyn was sitting with her the girl’s mood was much more melancholy. 

“What are you doing here? What’s going on?”

The girl launched into a sad, not uncommon story about how alone she felt as a freshman in high school and how nobody understood her. She was teased a lot by kids at school and her parents just kept telling her to smile more and wear more dresses and that would fix everything. Her best friend had moved away at the end of the summer and Frankie was all alone now and if school was going to suck this much after only two months then she didn’t see how she was going to make it through the whole year. And it was just her freshman year! How was she going to survive three more years of that hell after this year? At first Ashlyn thought the girl might have been mentally challenged but the more she listened, the more she realized that she was just a typical teenager trying to navigate the turbulent waters of high school. There was nothing wrong with Frankie, except that she was different from most of the other girls in her classes and didn’t know how to go about being that girl. Ashlyn told her some stories from her own high school years and tried to make her feel less alone. She suggested that she tell her parents about their talk today and try to keep talking to them until they understood that smiling more and wearing dresses wasn’t going to do anything other than make Frankie more miserable. They talked for almost 45 minutes and then the girl gave Ashlyn the two pictures she had drawn of her and for her. One was an action shot of the keeper stopping a shot, diving to her side in full extension. The other was a beautiful sketch of one of Ashlyn’s Nike photographs.

“Wow, these are really good Frankie” Ashlyn enthused. “You’re really talented. You should be doing a lot more drawing and sketching. Like, a lot more.”

The girl beamed at the compliment and blushed a little.

“How about I sign one of these for you and you can keep it to always remember our talk today. Does that sound good?”

“Yeah” she sounded sad again. “I shouldn’t come back here again, should I?”

“No, you shouldn’t come back here again Frankie. That’s right. You know you’re not really supposed to be here now, right?”

“Yeah” she sighed and looked bashfully at the keeper. “I’m sorry.”

“Well, I give one free pass to girls who help other people and girls who are artists. So you’re ok today. But this is it. Your one free pass. Deal?”

“Deal” they shook on it.

A dark blue volvo pulled into the driveway a few minutes later, after Ashlyn had signed the picture of her blocking the shot. She gave it back to Frankie and thanked her again for the picture of her that she was keeping. Early on in their conversation, Ashlyn had gotten Frankie to tell her that she was from Newton and what her parents’ names were and Ali had called her parents right away from inside the house to explain what was going on. 

“You called my parents?” Frankie looked offended and scared and hurt all at once.

“Yeah we did” Ashlyn put her arm around the girl’s shoulders and spoke gently to her. “I have kids and if one of them ever took off like you did today I think I would lose my mind with worry. Your parents love you Frankie and they may not always understand what you’re feeling and what’s going on with you, but I can promise you that they want to. They really truly want to. So next time things get too hard you need to talk to them. You make them listen if they’re not getting it right away. You remind them of today and I guarantee they’ll do their best to hear what you’re saying. Can you promise me you’ll do that?”

She was quiet for a few minutes as both of her parents walked up to the side of the porch with different looks of worry and concern on their faces. 

“Yeah. I promise” she nodded.

“And now I have to ask you a big favor that’s really really important to me. Please don’t tell anybody where I live ok? I need to keep my kids safe and I can’t do that if everybody knows where I live. Can I count on your help?”

“Yeah. I promise that too” she smiled, buoyed by the feeling of being needed.

Her parents came up behind the pair sitting on the front steps and wrapped their daughter up in a big, joint hug. The keeper was relieved that they were the kind of parents she had hoped they were. Ali joined them and Ken went inside to keep an eye on the kids. The brunette introduced herself as the person they had spoken with on the phone and they both thanked her profusely. After a few more minutes of talking among all five of them, Frankie and her parents drove away.

Later that night Ali and Ashlyn finally had a chance to process the unsettling visit.

“I’m so glad her parents were good about it” the keeper commented as she brushed her teeth at one of the vanity sinks. “That could have been awful if they were assholes.”

“Well I told them they needed to step up and be there for their daughter when I talked to them on the phone” Ali explained as she moisturized her face in the big mirror next to her wife.

“You did?!” Ashlyn’s eyes went wide and her mouth hung open for a couple of seconds.

“I did” Ali giggled. “Some poor girl is so lost and alone that the only person she feels like she can talk to about it is an athlete or celebrity that she follows online? I’m sorry, but that’s just not good enough.”

“She just needed to know she wasn’t alone” Ashlyn shrugged. “That’s not that complicated, really. She just wanted someone she trusted to tell her she was ok and that, despite all of the bullshit happening to her at school, she was a good person who deserved to be who she wanted to be. Herself.”

“Teenagers scare the absolute shit out of me” Ali confessed as she finished moisturizing and hugged her wife’s side, looking at her reflection in the mirror. 

“Me too” the keeper grinned and turned in her wife’s arms after rinsing her mouth out one more time. She hugged Ali and kissed the top of her head as she swayed their bodies back and forth. “But we’ll be better than that. I just know it.”


	16. Sad Sam

Marcy Hopkins had proven to be everything Ali had hoped for when she hired her, encouraged her, promoted her, mentored her and groomed her for success. She truly was Ali’s right-hand woman and the brunette shuddered to think about trying to do her job without the hard-working, reliable and capable young woman by her side. To her credit, Marcy had been smart enough to take all of Ali’s advice and encouragement and use it to better herself. She had taken some leadership courses and had really grown into her executive assistant position over the past five years since she had been promoted. Marcy had done such a good job that Ali promoted her again, two years ago, to Executive Manager. The only reason that Ali was able to work the relatively flexible schedule that she did was because Marcy was amazing. Back at the end of August, when the fantasy football league that the executive manager ran gathered to do its draft, Ali talked candidly with her protege after the last pick had been made.

“So now that you’ve finished drafting your masterpiece...” Ali teased and sat down next to Marcy on the couch in her Arlington condo, “I want to talk to you for a minute, ok?”

It was the Thursday night before Labor Day weekend and there were ten women spread around Marcy’s living room and kitchen trash-talking each other about drafting tight ends and kickers and defenses too soon. Ali had finally made it into the hard-core, women-only fantasy football league last year and she joked that it was only because she had given Marcy her latest promotion the year before. She had been waiting to join this league since they hired Marcy back in 2018 and somebody finally dropped out and made it possible. Everybody had been drinking and snacking and having a great time during the sometimes raucous 3-hour long draft. Commissioner Marcy was tough but fair with league rules and her enforcement of them, and she made some of the best guacamole Ali had ever tasted. Even more reasons to like this talented young woman. 

The brunette felt close to her gal Friday and trusted her implicitly. They had always been honest with each other, both appreciating directness and candor above all else. Marcy had blossomed under Ali’s tutelage and her success and confidence in the office had translated to other areas of her life as well. She had joined an a capella singing group in Cambridge and garnered some local attention with her beautiful voice. She was still more comfortable in the background in most situations, but her love of music and singing had won out over her innate shyness. She loved singing in that group and didn’t care who knew it or who heard them. Her increased confidence had also helped her find a boyfriend who seemed to appreciate her for all of her quirky awesomeness. Finally. Ali was thrilled for her, but also, selfishly, worried that she would be less focused at work as a result. So far it hadn’t been a problem but the brunette was still anxious. She had invested a lot of time, money and energy in Marcy and she also just really liked her as a person – she didn’t want to lose her.

“Sure thing Chief” she smiled, using the nickname she had given Ali at work, and put her frozen margarita down on the coffee table as she watched her boss sit down next to her. “Or should I start calling you Crusher now?” she chuckled, referencing the name of Ali’s fantasy football team ‘Krieger’s Crushers’.

“Hey, it has a nice ring to it” Ali feigned insult. “Whatever, you’ll be fearing it soon enough, just you wait” she smirked and then laughed.

“Ok, who did what now?” Marcy took a deep breath and focused her brain on Knight-Harris business as best she could. “Please try not to kill my buzz...” she cracked one last joke.

“No, nothing like that” Ali patted her arm reassuringly. “I would never do that to you. You’re off tomorrow and I don’t really want you to think about work at all...”

“But...” Marcy tilted her head and looked expectantly at the brunette.

“But...two quick things that I want you to think about. And not this weekend, wait until next week and then we can talk next Friday after the staff meeting, ok?”

“Ok” the executive manager was truly intrigued now.

“One is that I think it’s time to put the daycare plan into place at the office. I like our original plan on using interns from Lesley College and other good education schools in the area for staffing, but I want to revisit it. Let’s make sure we do it right but also as efficiently as possible.”

“Got it” she nodded. “There are definitely enough moms and dads now” she added, running through the list without skipping a beat, “you, Sutapa, Paul, Sela and Whitney...”

“You know about Whitney?” Ali interrupted.

“Yeah, she started telling people yesterday, I just assumed that’s why we’re talking about this now” she frowned in confusion.

“No, I had no idea she was telling people yet” Ali smiled, happy for her friend. “But yes, I think she’ll take advantage of it, for sure.”

“Well, we could always...”

“No” Ali shook her head and put her hand up to stop Marcy from continuing. “Just think about it after the weekend. Not now. I just want to reserve your big brain for some time next Friday, that’s all.”

“Fine, thanks Ali, I appreciate that” she grinned and picked up her drink for another sip.

“And the other thing is more important and much more personal so don’t feel like you have to say anything at all right now. Sometime before the end of this year I want to have a serious conversation with you about you getting your MBA so I’m giving you fair warning” Ali spoke quietly and seriously but smiled warmly when she was finished.

“Wow, yeah well, I’d love to, but buying this condo last year is about all the major expense I can handle right now...”

“No” Ali shook her head again. “Well, alright, I’ll tell you this much because it will probably influence most of what you think about” she added as she picked up her own frozen margarita. “I don’t think Knight-Harris can pay for the whole thing but I’d like to pay for half of your MBA program” she paused to let that sink in for a minute, sipping her drink. “But I want you to think carefully about it Marce, I’ll need you to make a significant commitment to the company if we do this together...”

“Ali, I...I...I don’t know what to say...” she was wide-eyed and her mouth was open.

“Just say you’ll think about it. That’s all I’m asking for tonight. I think you know that I want you to work with Knight-Harris for a very very long time. And I want to do everything I can to make that happen. Let’s work together to make sure we can do that – as long as you want to stay with us for a very very long time...”

“I do” she blurted out quickly and then blushed at her own exuberance. “I love my job...it’s the first time I’ve ever felt like the people I work with appreciate what I do and who I am.”

Marcy looked embarrassed at her admission but Ali’s face broke out into a nose-crinkling grin when she heard her words. They smiled at each other for a minute.

“Well cheers to that” Ali lifted her glass and clinked it with Marcy’s once she did the same thing. “And cheers to you because you’re awesome Marcy Hopkins and we’re lucky to have you and we all know it.”

They drank their toast and Marcy got one last jab in before the rest of the room came back to life around them.

“I’m still kicking your ass this season though, Crusher.”

//

Finding a location for the Stacy Everett Lewis Academy had proven to be the most difficult part of getting the soccer camp started, by far. Their goal had been to finalize the location by the end of August but that hadn’t happened. Here it was the first week in November and Ashlyn, Whitney and Cat Whitehill were driving up to the second to last place on their desperation list of potential camp locations. One of the lawyers at Knight-Harris had heard Whitney talking about how challenging it had been to find a location that would work for their camp. She wasn’t even looking for ‘the perfect place’ anymore. She just wanted a space that would work for them for next year, it didn’t have to be the place they ended up using every single year. The lawyer mentioned that she used to go to a girl scout camp when she was a kid and that she thought it hadn’t been used for a while. The hot tip, that turned out to be accurate when Whitney made a few phone calls to check out the potential availability, was Camp Riley in Greenfield, NH, right next to Greenfield State Park. Greenfield, NH was about 70 miles North and West of Boston and it took a little more than 90 minutes to make the drive. Campers could fly into the airport in Boston, MA or Manchester, NH or even the tiny airport in Jaffrey, NH which was only 20 minutes away from Greenfield. 

“I have a really good feeling about this one...” Ashlyn said under her breath as she steered Ali’s truck up the narrow, overgrown, gravel road through the dense woods.

“I feel like we might never be seen again” Whitney’s eyes looked cautiously around them, even behind the truck.

“Oh toughen up Engen” Cat teased with a big smile on her face. “I can’t wait to see what’s left of this place. My intel said it had been completely demolished and was unusable. I’ve never wanted to be more wrong in my life.”

There were two plans for the physical space, once they found one. The first option was to rent the space for the first season of the Academy. That would work if the space they found had everything they needed and was more or less in ‘move-in condition’. If they couldn’t find a place like that, which they had failed to do for several months now, they would need to purchase some property and build their own facilities. This was not ideal, especially with it being November already. If they had to go this route they wanted to find a place that had already functioned as a camp so that plumbing and electrical and sewage was already in place. Even if it hadn’t been used in years, it was there and, hopefully, ready to be turned back on. The three women had no idea what they were walking into with this location but they tried to be optimistic.

“Shit” Ashlyn’s voice was flat and discouraged.

Their faces fell when the truck finally arrived at the top of the gently sloping gravel road and stopped in front of the burnt-out shell of what used to be the main dining hall and gathering center for the camp. They silently got out and stood in front of the skeleton of what used to be a big, beautiful building, all three faces looking up to one of the big roof rafters that was still in place.

“Lightning strike, two years back, burned the whole thing down” a strong voice spoke from a few feet away and made all three women jump and scream. “Oh, sorry ladies” the park ranger chuckled as he took a step closer to them. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“Jesus” Cat exhaled. “It’s so quiet up here...we never heard you...”

“I think I peed a little” Whitney whispered so only Ashlyn could hear her as she leaned her forehead on the back of her best friend’s strong shoulder.

“You must be Bob” the keeper shook his hand and smiled at the elderly park ranger. “I’m Ashlyn, this is Cat and Whitney” she made the introductions. “Neil Donaldson is my next-door neighbor down in Gloucester...” she continued when Bob didn’t say anything.

“Is he still skinny as a bean pole?” Bob grinned and shook Whitney and Cat’s hands as the women all got their breathing back under control.

“Yeah” Ashlyn chuckled, “he is. I can’t thank you enough for agreeing to show us around up here. I know you’re doing us a favor and it means a lot.”

“Well, this technically isn’t state park property, but it abuts Greenfield State Park so we try to keep an eye on things as best we can. Off the record, of course” he explained and winked.

He looked like he was in his 60s with short gray hair and a grizzled face that had more than a couple of scars on it. He was wearing his park ranger uniform, forest green pants, tan button-up shirt and worn-in tan baseball cap. He was short and thick and looked remarkably sturdy. Bob walked them past the ruined main building and into the rest of the old camp, talking about the history of the place and giving them a rundown of events after the girl scouts stopped using the space. All three women were relieved to see that there were a handful of buildings still standing and seemingly in good repair towards the back of the open space behind the main building. By the time they were done walking down to the lake and back up the other side of the property they were hooked. It was perfect. Well, not nearly perfect in terms of the buildings and cabins but perfect in size and layout and space. Most importantly, all of the services were still in place and functional so the medical building, that was in the best condition, still had an overhead light that went on when they threw the switch on the wall and a bathroom with running water and a toilet that flushed. The bones and structure of the place were still in tact.

“So the girl scouts just decided not to come here anymore?” Whitney asked, saddened by the thought.

“Well the Governor opened up a brand new camp down at Monadnock State Forest two years ago and they moved there. It’s just west of Jaffrey and easier to get to. But this location here is so much nicer” Bob looked up and around as he smiled at the beautiful surroundings. “And the lake here is much better too.”

“We love it” Ashlyn couldn’t help but share her enthusiasm. “If we can swing it, we’d like this to be the home of our soccer Academy and summer camp. What do you think about that Bob?”

“Oh I think these big old trees would love the company again. If you treat them with respect these woods will protect you and keep you safe” he smiled warmly at the visitors.

They ran around and took as many pictures as they thought they could possibly need so they could map out a plan of attack once they got back home. If they were lucky they would have three months in the Spring for the construction work necessary to open the camp. And they would need the next four months to get everything coordinated, approved, funded and contracted. It was going to be close and they all knew it. They mobilized their forces and called in every favor they possibly could. Ali’s background with general contractors and architects proved especially beneficial as they worked on putting a design together for the buildings that needed to be built as well as the ones that needed to be repaired. The brunette’s first call was to Sarah Warren to see if she would be willing to help design the grand centerpiece of the whole camp – the dining hall and kitchen building that had been struck by lightning and destroyed by fire. Ali’s old friend George the builder signed on immediately and reached out to a bunch of other builders he knew to see if any of them would be willing to donate labor for the project. Ali’s marketing mind worked overtime coming up with deals and trades for services with the different professionals who agreed to help. They would get three years of free advertising on the Academy’s website and in all of their brochures and signage as well. If anybody doubted that the soccer camp was going to be a success Ali just played the clip of Bob Kraft talking it up to a sold-out Breakers stadium to chase their worry away. 

There were meetings at the Knight-Harris office building where Whitney worked on the financial aspect of buying the camp property and remaining buildings. That was her focus. Get the property purchased and get the building permits required for what they wanted to do. Ali focused on the building of the camp itself, the transformation of the physical space from desolate and deserted ghost of a camp to current, up-to-code, functional and fabulous soccer academy. Ashlyn and Cat worked on the investors and the staffing. These two areas had been in play all along but now that they had a concrete plan in the works they could be more specific about what they asked for and when they asked for it. There were multiple trips made up to Greenfield, NH that November as everybody did their best to make the dream come true. Ashlyn and Cat drove investors and potential investors up to dazzle them with the natural beauty of the location. Ali drove builders and Sarah the architect up to talk logistics and get the demolition guys ready to go as soon as the purchase was finalized. Whitney drove the banker up who was going to be funding their loan and delivered the best closing argument of her life to get her to believe in the Academy as much as they all did. It was a frantic, busy month but nobody complained because for the first time, the Academy was actually lurching forward, taking its first real step towards reality. 

One of the first trips that was made was the following week. Ali wanted to get Sarah up there right away so she could see what she was working with for herself instead of just relying on the pictures. Sam Machado had offered to assess the kitchen facility and equipment for them to see if any of it could be salvaged. The brunette had happily taken him up on the kind offer because none of them knew the first thing about professional grade cooking equipment and what would be needed to cook for 150-200 people at a time. Whitney also made the trip so she could explain what and where everything was. It was a cool, crisp fall afternoon in New England. Most of the leaves were already on the ground up there in NH, even though Greenfield was only about 20 miles north of the Massachusetts border. They had turned their vibrant fall colors and then died fast and early that year. They hadn’t had the first snowfall yet and it was just a beautiful, clear, morning with nothing but evergreens and white puffy clouds above them. After an hour of walking the property and taking it all in, they had split up with Whitney and Sam going to the kitchen and Ali and Sarah going around to try and get some rough measurements so the architect could get a preliminary schematic drawing started to show the investors.

“So what’s the deal with Sam?” the architect asked once she had stopped counting her paces and called out the number for Ali to write down on her graph pad.

“What do you mean?” Ali scrunched her face up, confused, before Sarah started walking the next line. “He’s a professional chef and he offered to help figure out if there was anything we could save in the kitchen” she shrugged her shoulders at her ex.

Sarah walked another perimeter edge line and called out the paces again, telling Ali to note that the grade was about 10 degrees.

“Well is he married? I didn’t see a ring...”

“Oh my God Sarah are you kidding me?” Ali practically hissed as she took four steps closer to the architect and lowered her voice. “He’s a widower and his son is Drew’s best friend...”

“Oh Ethan?” Sarah seemed surprised. “That really sucks. I’m sorry for both of them” she frowned as she looked at the brunette’s anxious face. “But what are you all upset about?”

“I’m not upset” she looked over her shoulder. “I just don’t want him to overhear us. He hates when people talk about them like this.”

The two women kept counting paces and noting gradients as they moved around the perimeter of the property. They were both happy that they had gotten to a nice, comfortable place in their friendship. They had been friends now longer than they had been lovers and the first thought in either of their heads was usually about one of their kids instead of flashbacks to naked romps.

“You know he’s got feelings for you, right?” Sarah asked quietly and was surprised by the look of bewilderment on Ali’s face.

“Yeah, right” the brunette snorted. “Trust me, he knows about Ashlyn. He’s at the house all the time with Ethan. Or else at the soccer games or at school. We both feel bad for him and try to include him whenever we can. He’s really nice too. Honestly,” she looked over her shoulder again, “I’m thinking about trying to set him up with Liz. But I’m not sure when to do that...like how soon is too soon to start dating after your wife dies?”

“Al, I’m telling you, he’s got Krieger fever. So you’d better lay down the law or remind him that lesbians aren’t just waiting for a guy to come along and spice up their sex lives” she laughed out loud and the sound echoed through the trees.

“What’s so funny?” Whitney called out from just up the hill where she and Sam were standing.

“Lesbian joke” Sarah replied with a shit-eating grin as she elbowed Ali in the ribs. “You wouldn’t get it.”

//

Whitney’s birthday was on Thanksgiving that year and she and Ryan flew out to spend the holiday with her family in California. They knew they wouldn’t be travelling too much the next year, not with baby Flanagan in tow. Both Ashlyn and Ali made the lawyer promise to not do any work during her vacation. If something came up and they needed her they would let her know. Otherwise, no Academy work, no K-H work, no nothing but relaxing and having a fun birthday and turkey day combined. Niki and Molly both had big families in New England so they always celebrated down in Rhode Island or on the South Shore of Boston for the holidays. Sydney and Dom, on the other hand, had only Sandi Leroux up in Ipswich and they had been integrated into the Krieger holidays several years ago. Nobody even asked anymore, it was just expected that the Dwyers and Sandi would be at family holidays. Ashlyn contemplated bringing the kids down to Florida for Thanksgiving but, honestly, she and Ali were just too sick of travelling with four little kids that year. They had done way more than they ever thought they would, starting with Disney World in January, then the solar eclipse in April, then the 3-week LA trip for the Olympics in July and August, and, finally, Championship week in Orlando in October. The Kriegers were staying put. At least until they made their annual trip to Satellite Beach right after Christmas. 

But because Ashlyn felt guilty about not seeing her family for Thanksgiving that year, she decided that she and Ali were going to host the holiday up North instead. They hadn’t hosted Thanksgiving since Ali was pregnant with Drew back in 2018 and they were both shocked that six years had flown by so quickly. Even though it had been a hectic month, they were both excited to be hosting turkey day again. Kyle, Nathan and Luna came and stayed with them up in Meg’s room on the third floor. Deb and Mike Christopher came back North with Mike’s daughter Lori, now 23 years old and making her own way in the world down in the Miami area. She had never experienced the holidays in New England and Deb was surprised when she took her up on their long-standing offer to join them when they went up to their condo in Manchester for Thanksgiving. It was nice to have a fresh face in the mix and that year they had more than one.

Sam and Ethan Machado knocked on the mudroom door around noontime on Thanksgiving Day, tray of delicious Portuguese desserts in hand. Drew and Ethan quickly disappeared into the mass of other children’s bodies playing in the backyard, all of them ignoring their parents’ pleas to stay clean until after they had eaten Thanksgiving dinner. Every parent knew that, even though they would be sitting down to eat at 1pm, there was no hope for clean clothes. Ken, Vicki, Koty and Brianna made the rounds, introducing themselves to Lori Christopher and occasionally wrangling a stray child that passed their way. Kyle, Nathan and Ashlyn were all out in the backyard supervising the mayhem and having a lot of fun doing it. When the Scott Krieger crew showed up a few minutes after Sam and Ethan, the guest list was complete and the house was full. It was hard to say who was having more fun in the backyard, the kids or the dogs. Bandit, Luna, Boss and the Dwyers’ new golden-doodle puppy named Ziggy were all racing around with Persey and Fred, knocking over fewer children than anyone expected.

Ali, Sydney and Sam worked in the kitchen getting the last few things ready for the huge meal. The coach wasn’t usually known to be helpful in the kitchen, but she just wanted to hang with her bestie because they hadn’t seen each other as much as they normally did. Too many quick drives to Greenfield, NH ruining a lot of get-togethers during the past three weeks. When 8-month old Maddox woke up early from his nap and needed to nurse, Sydney excused herself and apologized to the brunette for probably being late to the table because of her baby’s bad timing.

“Oh stop Syd” Ali smacked her butt as she started to climb the backstairs to get her baby. “I’ll check in with you before we eat, in case you’re close – we’ll wait.”

“So, I just wanted to thank you for inviting us here today” Sam said shyly once Ali brought her attention back to the counter where they were working side by side. “It’s...a tough day for us, for a lot of reasons” he swallowed hard. “And being included today ...well, it just means a whole lot. To both of us.”

Ali could hear how serious his voice had gotten and glanced up to see the emotion in his face as he spoke. She had come to expect some of this honesty from the man she had become friends with over the past several months especially. They had spent time coaching soccer together and the brunette had found Sam to be strong and friendly and fun but still surprisingly sensitive at times. And it wasn’t always when she was expecting it either. She had gone to Ethan’s house to pick up Drew after a classmates’ Halloween party had ended. Both Ashlyn and Ali had trouble getting to the classmate’s house on time so Ali had called Sam to see if he would bring Drew home with him. Parents did that for each other all the time, especially with their kid’s best friend. They helped each other out because they all knew it could be them the next time. Anything could happen during the afternoon that might make you late to pick up your child from whatever activity they were participating in and every parent had their list of two or three other parents that they relied on to bail them out every once in a while. Ali and Ashlyn had both been happy to add Sam to their list. When Sam answered the door late that afternoon he looked upset. His handsome face looked disjointed and fractured, his eyes red and his skin slightly flushed.

“Hi, thank you sooooo much...” she stopped talking immediately when she saw how broken he looked. “Sam, what’s the matter? Are you ok?”

He turned his head and walked into the next room, leaving the door open for Ali. She closed the door behind her and saw the boys playing video games in the living room, to her left, and then followed Sam into the kitchen to the right. He was leaning forward against the counter, his hands on the lip of the sink and his head bent down. Ali could see him shaking slightly as he fought to get his tears under control.

“Sam” she said softly and approached him, putting her hand on the back of his shoulder and standing beside him, leaning her hip against the counter and resting her other hand on his forearm. “What’s going on? Can I do anything?” her voice was still soft and full of concern.

The simple kindness she showed him unleashed the sobs that he had been fighting so hard to hold inside. He turned to her and hugged her tightly as the tears rolled down his cheeks. He clung to her like a drowning man and she really wondered if she had the strength to hold him up for very long. After a brief hesitation she wrapped her arms around his waist and did her best to support him as he sobbed. He didn’t stay lost for long though. He caught himself almost as quickly as he had lost himself, stepping back and forcefully wiping the tears off of his face with his fingers as he tried to catch his breath.

“Oh shit, I’m so sorry Ali...I...”

“Hey, it’s ok” she tried to soothe him but didn’t have the first idea what the problem was or how to fix it. She stood awkwardly in place and watched him take a few deep breaths while he looked out the kitchen sink window again. “Feel better?” she tried, hopefully.

“Yeah” he smiled sheepishly at her and then looked away again. “Ahhh, I hate Halloween” he sighed out and squeezed his eyes shut for another minute.

“Who hates Halloween?” she chuckled, thinking he was trying to make a joke and change the mood in the room.

“I do” he shrugged and gave her a sad smile. “It was Maggie’s favorite and Ethan loves it because she did but...ahhh, damn it” he stopped and clenched his jaw trying to stay composed. “Now it just fucking hurts too much.”

“Oh Sam, I’m so sorry. I had no idea...I never would have said that...”

“Don’t” he shook his head at her and smiled a little bit bigger. “How could you possibly have known? Thank you for being so kind to me Ali. You’re always just so good to me and it helps so much. To be honest, before this past summer, when school ended last year, I was really wondering if I had done the right thing coming back here. I haven’t lived here for so long and everything felt new and strange and I didn’t really have any friends...” he paused, turning his body slightly so he faced the brunette more. “Not any friends who had a clue what life with a kid was like anyway” he chuckled and rolled his eyes. “I was really lonely. Sad, of course, and missing my wife, but lonely on a daily basis. And when Ethan found Drew things started to feel a tiny bit better. And then when I met you, I don’t know, you looked at me differently than the other parents did. Like,” he tried to find the right words, “you know what we’re going through but you don’t judge us or pity us. You’re just there for us. You have no idea how great that feels.” His lip quivered as he finished.

“Hey” she smiled at him and rubbed his arm. “You’re doing a great job, from what I can tell anyway. And, truthfully, I have no clue what you guys are going through. But I know it’s awful and I’m sorry I can’t help you more. But I also know that you’re stronger now than you were this summer, right?”

“Yeah” he nodded and looked down, embarrassed that he needed a pep talk like this. 

“And you’re going to keep getting stronger and stronger all the time. And, next year, I’ll come get Ethan for Halloween if you want so you don’t have to deal with it. And when you’re strong enough to do Halloween with him again” she shrugged, “you will.”

He exhaled loudly and looked up to the ceiling to keep his tears at bay.

“Thank you so much Ali” he spoke quietly as he gave her another hug.

She returned the hug and it didn’t feel awkward at all. It felt like she had just helped a friend feel a little bit better about something horrible. 

“What are you guys doing for dinner tonight?” she asked as they separated and he pulled himself together some more.

“Oh, I haven’t gotten that far yet” he chuckled. “But we won’t starve, I promise.”

“Why don’t you guys come over and join us? If you don’t mind the circus, that is” she grinned at him.

“You don’t have to do that Ali” he shook his head and felt embarrassed again. 

“Well don’t feel like you have to, but you’re more than welcome, anytime. And especially tonight” she patted his arm as she walked past him back into the hall. “What do you say?”

“I say it sounds wonderful” he smiled, the first real smile she had seen since she had arrived. “Thanks Ali.”

And when the brunette had heard Ethan telling Drew that they didn’t do anything on Thanksgivings she thought the boy must be confused. But sure enough, when she checked with his father the next day, the boy was right. Sam didn’t get into the details other than to say that every Thanksgiving his parents went to visit his brother and didn’t come back home until the next day. It was what the Machados did for turkey day every year. The brunette had a lot of questions but didn’t want to pry. Instead, she found herself inviting them over to the big old house to share the holiday with her family. And here they were, working together in the kitchen, as usual. 

“You’re very welcome Sam. I’m glad you and Ethan could make it” she replied with a sincere smile.

It wasn’t until after the meal when everyone had scattered around the house recovering from their too-full bellies and stuffed faces that she learned why the day was so tough for Sam. She had been cooped up in the house all day and wanted to get some fresh air before the annual Krieger soccer game started. Ali used the time to go out into the backyard and make sure there were no dog mines – which there weren’t because her wife was an angel and had already picked up after all six dogs, and then started to put toys and lawn furniture away so there was room for the game. Several family members were already on clean-up duty in the kitchen and Vicki had banished the brunette from the room, telling her she had more than done her fair share of the work already that day.

“Need a hand?” Sam offered as he started to kick random footballs and dodge balls and every other kind of ball over towards the side of the garage where he knew they were stored.

“Oh, you don’t need to do that Sam” she smiled. “But thanks.”

It only took them a few minutes to finish and they sat in two of the chairs up against the back of the house to survey the field.

“You didn’t hear this from me” she joked out of the side of her mouth, “but this game can be kind of brutal so enter at your own risk.”

“Oh that’s how it is huh?” he chuckled. “Thanks for the warning. We should probably go anyway, let you have some time with your family.”

“Sam, you don’t have to go” she shook her head. “We’re firm believers in the more the merrier.”

“That’s the wrong holiday Krieger, but I get your point” he smiled but looked sad the very next second.

“You doing ok?” she asked carefully. “Ethan seems to be having a good time.”

“Yeah, he loves it here. Big house full of family...” his voice changed and he abruptly stopped talking.

“Tell me your Thanksgiving story” she challenged, hoping it would help if he just got it out in the open. “If you want to.”

He was quiet for a full minute, deciding if it was worth the risk. He didn’t want Ali to think any less of him or his family and that was what always happened when he talked about his brother. Something about her made him believe she wouldn’t be phased by it.

“There’s not too much to tell” he sighed sadly. “My brother, Jason, he’s two years older than me, he took a different path than I did. I love him, but I hate him too” he admitted, showing more of the candor that Ali liked so much. “He’s in prison, up in New Hampshire and he’s been in and out of jail for the past twenty years.”

Sam kept his eyes focused on the woods at the back of the backyard, unable to meet the brunette’s sympathetic gaze. Ali listened, and then spoke softly, sensing how difficult this was for him to reveal.

“That’s awful Sam. I’m sorry you and your family have had to deal with that all this time.”

“My parents should be enjoying a nice retirement right now” his jaw set and his eyes squinted a little bit as he spoke. “But they’ve spent so much money on bail and lawyers and fines for my dirtbag brother...” he shook his head and dropped his eyes to the ground in front of him as he took a deep breath. “I don’t think he’s getting out this time though, but who knows?” he shrugged. “But it’s hard for them to go visit him because they have to close the pizzeria and one day’s lost income is a lot for them. They don’t have any disposable income Ali” he glanced at the brunette and saw nothing but concern in her eyes.

“Your poor parents” she shook her head. “No matter what, he’s still their son and they want to help him as much as they can...”

“Yeah, well he’s an asshole” Sam spit out the words as his face became angry. “It was hard enough for them to get up to see him at the prison in Concord” he explained, referring to Concord, NH which was about 90 miles Northwest of Gloucester. “So what does he do?” he paused for a second before continuing, the anger in his voice rising. “He fucks up and gets sent all the way up to Grafton. It’s almost four hours away, up in Northern NH. Prick.”

“So it’s almost impossible for them to get there...”

“Exactly. He’s such a selfish bastard. He doesn’t care what kind of stress he adds to their lives. He’s let them drain their life savings for him and for what? The only good thing about him is that at least when he’s in prison they don’t have to try and squirrel away bail money. Some older couples save money for a big trip they‘ve been dreaming about their whole lives, or maybe something nice for the house or a new car or something that they could actually enjoy.” His face was dark with anger. “Not my parents. They scrimp and save so they’ll have bail money for my dirtbag brother when he gets out of prison again.”

“So they go up to see him on Thanksgiving because the restaurant’s already closed and they won’t lose any money” Ali finally puts it together, nodding her head slowly.

“Right, except they do have to keep the pizzeria closed tomorrow because that’s when they’ll drive back. They can’t drive at night so they can’t make it all the way up there and back in one damned day.”

“And you don’t go with them?” the brunette’s question was simple and straightforward, not intended to goad or guilt him into anything.

“Never. And I refuse to talk about him. I don’t even want Ethan to know he exists.”

“Have they ever met? Like, when he was a baby?”

“No, never” Sam shook his head. “Maggie and I agreed we weren’t going to let my brother’s poison into our lives. We’ve never told Ethan a thing about him and I told my parents not to either.”

“Where does Ethan think your parents are now?”

“Friends.” He saw the skeptical look on Ali’s face. “I know. It won’t hold up too much longer, as he gets older. There are pictures of Jason and me in my parents’ house too that he’ll see someday, when he’s old enough to notice those things. I’ll deal with that when it happens I guess.”

“Wow Sam, that’s a lot to deal with on a day that’s supposed to be about being thankful for what you’ve got.”

“Well we do celebrate what we’re thankful for” he clarified with a small smile. “We just do it by ourselves usually. Just the two of us now.” His voice broke and he took a few seconds to clear his throat. “We do Christmas up right though, with my parents and tons of Christmas spirit. He gets a good family holiday then.”

They both heard the mudroom door open and voices laughing as they approached the backyard for the soccer game.

“I’ll bet he loves that” the brunette smiled back at him. “I’m glad you guys joined us today Sam” she reached over and held his hand for a couple of seconds, patting it as she stood up. “Happy Thanksgiving.”


	17. Nonni's Chicken Soup

There were so many kids among the four families that date night hadn’t happened since Sydney had the baby back at the beginning of March. They all missed it but nobody was really sure what the fix was. Ten children was too many for one couple to watch, especially when the twins and Maddox were so little. Molly’s secret plan was to add Whitney and Ryan to the official date night program once they had their baby next year. It was still incredibly unfair but she knew the Flanagans would sign on. They were good people and they loved everybody else’s kids too much to turn it down. Once all four of the four families were involved then Molly thought a 50/50 split would work out. Everybody would get together at one house and two couples would go out for dinner and two couples would stay and babysit. She also wanted to start doing date nights on Saturdays so they could begin earlier in the afternoon, like at 3 or 4pm. That way they didn’t have to worry about putting the kids to sleep because parents would be coming back at 7:30pm to take their own kids home and put them to bed. And they could plan the occasional sleepover but certainly not every month. Those were a lot of work and they almost never went without a hitch. When it all came down to it, they would all get to go out six times during the year, and would have to babysit the other six times. Six date nights were way better than none. And soon, hopefully, the kids would be getting old enough where they wouldn’t need so much attention and could even help with some of the littlest ones. When that happened, they could go back to one couple staying in and babysitting. But that was still a few years off.

Until then, they were doing their best to help each other out. Niki and Molly would drive their kids up to the big old house for Ashlyn and Ali to babysit while they went out to dinner. Seven kids was so much better than ten, and the Cross kids were older too. Their youngest, Penny, was almost three years old. Niki and Whitney came up to babysit the Krieger kids so Ashlyn and Ali could go out for a date night of their own. Ali and Molly babysat all three of the Dwyer boys, plus Drew, leaving Niki and Ashlyn home with three kids each. They made it work because they all needed it to work. Finding time away, even just for a couple of hours over dinner, was really hard. Babysitters cancelled. Kids got sick. Parents got sick. Work schedules changed. Travel schedules changed. Life just happened and left you high and dry sometimes, just wishing for a date night with your spouse. They still valiantly tried to do the mall for pictures with Santa early every December. They wouldn’t even attempt it if Whitney and Ryan didn’t agree to join them, which they usually did. Whitney was 6 months pregnant that December but she was still more than happy to help her friends get their kids to see Santa.

Her pregnancy, so far, had been fairly uneventful. She had been 36 years old when she got pregnant and would be 37 when she delivered her baby. That was the same age that Ali had been with Josie, and a year younger than Ashlyn had been with the twins. So far, the lawyer was having an identical pregnancy to what her own mother had experienced with both she and her brother. That meant just a touch of morning sickness and then, eventually, the usual discomforts that come from carrying a baby around inside you for nine months. But there was nothing scary or high-risk or out of the ordinary for Whitney and everybody was relieved. Both Ashlyn and Ali wondered how much their friend shared with Ryan about the things that went on ‘down there’ while a woman was pregnant. Ali knew that Sydney had been brutally honest with Dom because that was just how Sydney was. But Whitney was another story entirely. Ashlyn agreed that her best friend was probably struggling with sharing some of the less savory parts of pregnant life with Ryan. 

“I’m just saying you should talk to her” Ali encouraged her wife one evening after the kids were asleep. “Lift it a little more babe” she requested as Ashlyn held up one of the seat cushions of the leather couch in the front living room so Ali could vacuum under it. 

Cleaning the furniture was not part of the deal with Marisol, the house cleaner who took over after Mrs. Riley retired, and if they didn’t clean that couch once a week it got nasty. The twins were still not great about getting whatever was in their hands into their mouths, especially if they were distracted by the tv or one of their siblings or a dog. Josie wasn’t always much better either. It was easy to expect her to be more on Drew’s level than the twins’ but she was really right in the middle. At 3-1/2 she was still pretty little and pretty messy.

“Oh God, what is that?” Ashlyn wrinkled her nose up in disgust as they both peered down at something that looked like a pale yellow Cheeto, not the puffy kind.

“I don’t know but it’s too big to go in this crevice attachment, can you grab it honey?” the brunette asked as she moved the vacuum over to the other corner of the cushion Ashlyn was holding up.

“I’m not touching it” the keeper replied, like a ten-year old.

Ali gave her a withering look, rolled her eyes and leaned in to grab the unappetizing snack. This was the dynamic that nobody would believe between these two. Big, tough Ashlyn wussing out and making Ali pick up the gross thing one of their kids had let fall between the cushions of the couch sometime in the past 6 days. This was the same dynamic that had Ali killing the spiders in the house and cleaning out the lint trap on the drier too.

“My hero” Ali rolled her eyes again as she put what she guessed was a moldy, shrivelled baby carrot on the coffee table so they could move along to the next pillow. “Next, please.”

Thankfully, there were only a few goldfish crackers and fruit gummies that all seemed fairly fresh as they finished up with the vacuum. The dogs generally did a good job of cleaning up any leftover snacks or fallen food, but even they couldn’t get underneath the couch pillows without some assistance.

“Whit will ask me if she has any questions” Ashlyn picked up their conversation when they were finished with the chore. 

The keeper knew she had some ground to make up after being such a diva with the mystery couch food earlier so she plopped herself down sideways on Ali’s lap and offered her one of her favorite chocolates with caramel inside. Ashlyn put her left arm around her wife’s shoulders, kissed her cheek sweetly, and held out her right hand with the chocolate in her palm.

“Ooooff” Ali groaned, surprised by the blonde’s choice of seat. But the sweet kiss and the delicious chocolate made her smile broadly. “Thanks” she plucked the chocolate out of her wife’s hand and kissed her lips, humming into them. “Mmmmmmmm...” 

“Don’t you think she’ll ask me?” Ashlyn repeated, starting to wonder if she had misjudged Whitney’s anticipated behavior. 

“I don’t know” Ali shrugged as she unwrapped the chocolate and popped it into her mouth. “Maybe?”

“She told me all about the morning sickness and the backaches and the swollen feet...”

“Boy is she going to be surprised when her feet get even more swollen” Ali giggled. “She thinks they’re big now and she’s only at 6 months” she shook her head and grinned.

“That’s what I said too” Ashlyn chuckled and tucked some of the brunette’s hair behind her ear.

“So she’s told you about all the easy stuff” Ali challenged. “None of that stuff is hard to talk about with anybody. But I don’t think she’ll be one to be chatty about her leaky bladder and her toots and hemorrhoids and all of that really sexy stuff” she giggled as Ashlyn leaned over and kissed a tiny bit of chocolate off of the corner of her mouth. “Babe...are you listening to me?” Ali whined and hugged the blonde on her lap.

“Every word sugarplum” she grinned. “And as much as I hate to admit it, you might be right” she sighed. “It was so great for us because, I don’t know, we’re both girls and we talk about that stuff easier than straight couples, maybe. Right?”

“I think it just depends, but yeah, I think, in general, that’s probably right. But then you have people like Syd...”

“Oh my God” Ashlyn laughed out loud, throwing her head back and slapping her own thigh. “Poor Dom must have been mortified.”

“Oh, I think he knew what he was getting himself into” Ali chuckled and pressed her palm against her wife’s stomach, just wanting to touch her. “But you’re the same way, just not quite as direct as Syd.”

“What do you mean I’m the same way?”

“Well especially with Whitney. You just never hold anything back from her. You have no boundaries with her, which is great, but you assume that everybody is the same as you. But we’re not” she quirked her eyebrow. “Some of us are a little more private and have a harder time talking about some intimate things than you do.”

“Geez, I never thought about it like that” Ashlyn exhaled slowly as her beautiful brunette leaned over and kissed her neck softly. “Mmmm, that’s nice baby” the keeper practically purred.

“Please talk to Whitney Ash. Because if you don’t, then I will and that’ll only make her uncomfortable. We’re close but nowhere near as close as you two are.”

“Ok, yeah, I’ll call her tomorrow and check in with her.

“Don’t do it over the phone” Ali frowned. “Go bring her lunch or something.”

“Got it. Great idea hon” the keeper brought their lips together in a romantic kiss.

//

The WNBA Finals had been played in early November and the Boston Beacons had defeated the Washington Mystics to win the championship. It was the first in the team’s history and Kamala Pierce had been the MVP. Kamala’s agent, Sela Shapiro, attended every game and helped the rising star of the league handle the press. It had been a really entertaining series full of excellent basketball by both teams, but media coverage for the WNBA was still disappointingly low. The new NWHL season had just started in October and the NWSL season had just completed in October. There were lots of professional female athletes around and Ali and Ashlyn did their best to get as many of them to the Beacons games as possible. Hilary Knight had retired at the end of the NWHL season that had just finished in April. And, as they had all hoped, she had gone out as a Champion as the Boston Pride took the trophy home again. The Olympian was in town that November to try and help the Pride and the rest of the NWHL kick off their season and she was happy to join Ashlyn, courtside, for all four of the Beacons home games. It was a best of seven series and Boston had the better record so they got to host four of the games. It had come down to a dramatic game 7 but Boston took control early in the third quarter and never let up, cruising to victory.

As great as it was to have so many female sports stars in attendance, the real draw had been the contingent of Boston Celtics who attended the final. Isaiah Thomas and four other players cheered loudly and animatedly for the Beacons from their luxury box up high above the court. The jumbotron found them early and often and the crowd went crazy every time the Celtics players appeared. One of the proudest moments in Ashlyn’s life was when, right after the final buzzer sounded, Kamala ran over to the sideline and hugged Ashlyn and Hilary as they celebrated her victory. It seemed so long ago that the young athlete had dealt with all the scrutiny and criticism for talking about the mistreatment she suffered at the hands of her first agent. Three seasons later here she stood a Champion and an MVP to boot. Her popularity had risen, just as Ali told her it would, after the publicity from the way Knight-Harris handled everything. But more than that, her skill on the court and her personality off of it were the real catalysts to her skyrocketing success. Ashlyn couldn’t have been happier or more proud if it had been her own daughter winning that championship that night. What a fucking night.

//

Ali had told her wife about her talks with Sam and how emotional he had gotten at Halloween and again at Thanksgiving as he shared more of his story and his grief and his family with her. Ashlyn’s heart had broken, just as Ali’s had when she heard the painful stories. The keeper was happy that Sam and Ethan felt comfortable with their family. She knew it would never be the same but she hoped it brought them a tiny bit of comfort as they navigated through their grief. Ashlyn hadn’t actually seen any signs of that vulnerability from Sam herself, until the holiday performance at school towards the end of December. The kindergarten class’ performance was a song that they had been practicing for a couple of months. At certain times during the song, each of the 18 kids held up their drawing of what they wanted most for Christmas. It was hard to see from the seats in the auditorium but the teachers and volunteer parents had taken pictures of all of the drawings and showed them on the big screen during the performance so everybody could get a good look at each one when it was time. Ali and Sam were two of the four parent volunteers for the ‘holiday performance’ that year. They had worked on the song itself, helping the kids memorize the words and learn to watch their teacher at the back of the room so they could follow along with her arm movements and dance steps throughout the song. The other two parent volunteers had worked on the drawings with the kids.

Ashlyn, Deb, Mike, Ken, Vicki, Whitney and Sydney all sat in the auditorium with Josie and the twins as they watched all of the grades at the elementary school perform their numbers, that meant K – 5th grade. Ali came and sat with them until it was the kindergarteners’ turn about halfway through the show, and then went up and stood just offstage in the wings to make sure all the 5-yaer olds had their drawings facing the right way and went onstage in the correct order. She and Sam took stage left and the other two parent volunteers took stage right. The kids were absolutely adorable. Some of them were nervous and stood stock still as they waited for their music to start, while others were excited and couldn’t stand still if their lives depended on it. A couple of kids waved to familiar faces in the auditorium. Too freaking cute. 

When the music finally started to play, the kids began to sing, the parent volunteers singing along from the wings and encouraging the kids to watch their teacher so they could follow her movements. They proudly lifted their drawings up and then made sure to hold onto it when their turn had passed. Drew did a great job, for all his shyness. He was one of the first to go. He really seemed comfortable up there on stage which shocked the whole Krieger contingent. Ashlyn was sure it was because his best buddy Ethan was standing right next to him and making his confidence soar. Their little boy held his drawing up and the whole auditorium laughed as they read his carefully printed words at the top, describing what he wanted most for Christmas that year. Drew’s read ‘shark or dinosaur’ with a pretty good rendition of each below the corresponding name. Ali, who hadn’t seen the drawings yet because she and Sam had been in charge of the song lyrics and movements for the kids, let out one of her short, loud, shouts of a laugh. It rang out and Ashlyn felt it deep in her chest. Just when the performance couldn’t get any better or the blonde be any happier, her favorite laugh in the whole world just sweetened the entire performance for her. Sam chuckled and nudged the brunette where they stood just off stage. Ashlyn and most of the audience could see all four volunteer parents where they stood in the wings. 

Drew’s class all sang a few more bars of the song and then it was Ethan’s turn to hold up his drawing. The laughter that had accompanied Drew’s impossible picture was replaced by ‘awwwwwsss’ and more than a few whispers. Sam visibly flinched when he saw his son’s drawing up on the big screen. He gasped and sobbed and then turned and ran off into the darkness deeper offstage. Ali didn’t know what had happened until she looked up at Ethan’s drawing and heard the auditorium door click behind her, telling her that Sam had left the performance completely. The drawing that seemed to stay on the big screen four times longer than everybody else’s showed some pretty good stick figures. One was a tall woman with a pink skirt or apron on and the other was a little boy holding a gift-wrapped box and handing it to the woman. The words at the top read ‘a visit from my mommy’.

The song kept playing and the kids kept singing but they could tell something was wrong. There was about 2/3 of the class still to go. The audience had become hushed and the whispers were getting louder. There was a nervous energy filling the room and ruining everything. Ashlyn stood up and started clapping loudly and whistling her approval, quickly joined by most of the rest of her group. A couple other of Ethan’s friends’ families did the same thing, trying desperately to let the boy know he had done a good job. As soon as Ali saw the picture she ran after Sam, unable to imagine what that must have felt like for him to experience. As she went out the door into the dark hallway she silently cursed the two other parent volunteers for not giving Sam a heads up. That was just unbelievable. She let her eyes adjust to the darkness for a few seconds and then saw Sam at the end of the hall with his head in his hands. She hesitated for a minute, unsure whether to give him his privacy or not. But she couldn’t do it. If she were in his position she would want somebody, anybody, to come and give her a hug and help her get her shit together so she could go be strong for her son. And that’s what she did. 

She walked quickly to the end of the hall and turned Sam sideways so she could hug him and tell him she was sorry. He latched onto her like he had done in his kitchen at Halloween. He seemed to have gotten most of the sobbing out of his system already and was trying to steady his breathing and pull himself together. His face was red and blotchy and his eyes were barely open. When Sam leaned his head back to look at the kind woman trying to help him, Ali looked into his hazy, distraught eyes and told him how strong he was and how lucky Ethan was to have him but, before she could finish with ‘how proud Maggie would be of them both’, Sam kissed her. It was soft and tender for a second but then became searching and a little desperate as he slid his tongue between Ali’s lips. Her mouth had been open because she was talking but she didn’t kiss him back, she was just stunned and stood there, frozen. By the time the brunette realized what was even happening, Sam pulled his mouth away and went back to the tearful hug.

“God that was so hard” he gasped over Ali’s shoulder. “My poor baby, does he really think she’s going to come visit him? Have I totally fucked him up? Where did he get that idea from? What am I going to do?” he sobbed out in a voice that was almost panicked.

Ali’s head was spinning. She wanted to help her friend so much but she wasn’t sure what to do in that moment. His only concern seemed to be for Ethan, which was good and as it should be. But was she just supposed to pretend that he hadn’t just kissed her? Did it really happen? The way he had gone right back to a grief-stricken hug and rambling made her think maybe he didn’t realize what he was doing. She flashed back to a story her brother had told her years ago about one of his best friends trying to sleep with him after her father’s funeral. Kyle had explained that the emotions involved in grief are often confused with sex or lust. It was something about a primal need to feel alive or something. She couldn’t remember it all right then. What the fuck was happening? She took a minute and let him sob his agonizing questions out and then she snapped out of the confused fog she had been in since he kissed her.

“You’re going to pull yourself together now Sam” she spoke clearly, stepping back and grabbing his face in both her hands and squeezing just a little bit. She waited until his eyes focused on hers and she saw only worry and grief and fear. “You can do it. We need to go back in there and help the kids offstage, right?” she asked him an easy question to get him back on track.

“Right” he nodded weakly and blinked a couple of times.

“Ok, so take some deep breaths and think about Ethan and what he needs right now” she brushed the tears off of his face with her fingers while he took his deep breaths. “He needs his dad more than ever. You need to tell him what a great job he did with his drawing and then you talk to him about Maggie for as long as he wants tonight. You just look at pictures of her and tell him stories about her Sam, because he’s missing her. You both are.”

They stared at each other for another minute, almost like a prizefighter and his coach in their corner between rounds at the end of the toughest fight of his career.

“You can do this Sam. We have to go back in there now. The song’s almost over. Are you ready?” she asked as she took him by the hand and started to lead him towards the door to the backstage area. “Sam! Are you ready?”

“Yeah” he cleared his throat and straightened his spine. He pulled his hand out of Ali’s and rubbed his face one last time. “Yeah, I’m ready.”

//

“What the fuck do you mean, he kissed you?!” Sydney bellowed the next afternoon. Ali had stopped on her way home from work to visit her friend before picking up Josie and the twins from daycare. “Like, kissed you kissed you? For real?”

“Yes” Ali hissed as she looked back towards the playroom. “Keep your voice down, Jesus Christ.” She took a deep breath. “That’s all I need – Cash blurting that out the next time we’re all together.”

“Wait, so you didn’t tell your wife about this?” the coach’s jaw dropped.

“No, not yet. I don’t know if I’m going to...” she flopped against the back of the couch and groaned as she covered her face with both hands.

“Alexandra please...what the fuck are you doing?”

“I don’t know what I’m doing Syd, that’s why I need to talk to you about it!”

“Alright, alright” she reached over and patted her best friend’s knee. “Tell me what you’re thinking. No, tell me what the fuck happened first. Jesus fucking Christ” she shook her head and took her own deep breath.

Ali spent a few minutes telling the coach exactly what had happened and answering some basic questions about how close she and Sam were as friends in the first place. The brunette filled her in on everything he had confessed to her in his moments of grief and doubt. She told Sydney about the Halloween hug and cry and the brutally honest story about his brother at Thanksgiving. 

“So basically, you’re just friends and he trusts you enough to let you in on some of the tough moments that he and Ethan go through around these holidays. But there’s been no flirting or anything like that. It’s always been just strictly friendship. Right?”

“Exactly” the brunette sighed heavily and closed her eyes for a few seconds. “Aside from those two conversations, he’s just as friendly with Ash as he is with me. I don’t think he treats us any differently. I spend more time with him like at soccer and the school performance, but that’s the only difference.”

“No, I get it. You’ve always been the one that people talk to about stuff. I mean...” Sydney paused and thought about it some more, “yeah, it’s always been you” she nodded. 

“Sydney,” she levelled her best friend with a devastatingly honest stare, “I love Ashlyn” she punctuated each word with a nod of her head as her eyes stayed glued to the coach’s. “I have no feelings for him other than sympathy and, I guess, friendship. I mean, he’s nice and easy to be around but I don’t have any interest in him.”

“Ok, whew” Sydney let out a relieved giggle. “That’s good to hear.”

“And I haven’t flirted with him at all. And I don’t think he’s flirted with me either, but I can be...”

“Yeah, you don’t always pick up on that” Sydney chuckled. “But nothing from you, right? No encouragement...”

“No!” the brunette yelled defensively. “Sorry. I did this to myself all night so I’m a little sensitive to it now I guess.” She took a breath and spoke again. “I hugged him when he broke down at Halloween and I squeezed his hand after he told me about his brother at Thanksgiving. But that’s it besides some high-fives on the soccer field, surrounded by 5-year old boys and girls.”

“Ok, good. Just checking boo. I’m not saying you did anything wrong. At all” she reached out and put her hand on Ali’s knee again.

They were quiet for a minute, both deep in thought.

“I mean, the kiss was just completely out of the blue. If you asked me to predict what would happen next in that exact same moment one hundred times, I would guess a hundred different things and not one of them would have been a kiss like that” she explained earnestly. 

“Was it a good kiss?” Sydney grinned slyly, trying to take the edge off with some humor.

“God, Syd, I don’t know...no” she shook her head as if she was trying to shake the memory of that moment right out of it. “It was so weird and it just...well, it wasn’t Ash” she shrugged sadly.

“I know, but geez I think you get a pass on this one Alibaba. You didn’t do anything to invite it or make him think you would be receptive to it in any way. So quit beating yourself up over it.” 

There was another short silence between them and then Sydney asked the question she had been dying to ask all along.

“What did it really feel like to kiss someone besides your wife?” the coach lowered her voice and her eyes and, for once, seemed embarrassed to be asking the question.

“It felt creepy and wrong and, just, weird. Ok?” she answered, her voice sounding agitated.

“Yeah, ok” Sydney patted her leg again and left her hand there for a few minutes more. “I was just curious. I think we all wonder about it. Doesn’t mean we want to or would ever do anything about it.”

“God no” Ali shook her head again. “I don’t want to kiss anybody but my wife. Ever. Again.”

“So why aren’t you telling her about it?”

“I thought about it all night and then again all day today” Ali began with a heavy sigh. “I didn’t tell her right away because there just wasn’t time. We were all worried about Ethan and I had to help the rest of the kids...and then we went home and had everybody over for dessert, I don’t know, you were there – it was a fun, easy evening. It just didn’t seem more important than what we were doing, you know?”

“Yeah, I get what you’re saying” Sydney nodded. “But why didn’t you tell her later last night?”

“I don’t know.” She looked down, feeling guilty. “Part of me just wanted to forget it even happened. It didn’t mean anything, not to me anyway, so why bring it up if it’s only going to upset her?” Ali paused and tugged on her fingers in her lap for a minute. “Honestly Syd, I don’t even know if he knows he did it” she met her friend’s concerned gaze.

“Really?”

“I swear, he kissed me and then before I could even do anything about it, he stopped and started crying again, worrying about Ethan and wondering if he had fucked his son up.”

“Damn” Sydney said softly and squeezed Ali’s knee.

“It was like it never happened. So do I bring it up again and talk to him about it or do I just go along and forget it happened too?”

“What will Ash do when you tell her?”

“She’ll be pissed. And I think she’ll want Sam to stay away from us...”

“Can’t blame her for that.”

“No, not at all. I’m pissed too if I let myself think about it like that. Why the fuck did he do that? Sam and Ethan are both great and Drew’s never been happier and I think we’ve all been good for Ethan...”

“And you’re afraid if Ash says Sam has to stay away that Ethan will be the one who ends up paying the price. Sam will keep him away too” Sydney suggested with a knowing sigh.

“Right. All of that is why I haven’t told her yet” the brunette closed her eyes again. “And that’s why I don’t want to tell her at all. Why wreck everything when I don’t even know where Sam’s coming from?”

“I don’t know Al, that’s tough. I mean, I totally get what you’re saying, but do you honestly think he doesn’t know he kissed you?” she challenged with a quirked eyebrow. “That seems like a reach to me.”

“I know” Ali whined. “I’m afraid I just want that to be the truth because that’s the best possible outcome. But then when I go back to the way he just totally stopped it...it just felt like an out of control moment and he corrected it. He was such a mess. And I feel terrible for him. Can you imagine how awful it was for him to see Ethan’s picture up there like that?”

“No, that was brutal...for everybody” Sydney added. “I can’t even begin to imagine what it was like for him.”

“Do you remember Kyle telling us about his friend Lisa at her dad’s funeral?” Ali asked.

“Ummm...”

“They were best friends and he took the train upstate to be there for her and go to the funeral” Ali tried to jog her memory. “He stayed at her parents’ house with her for three days and tried to take care of everybody...”

“Oh my God” Sydney’s eyes lit up. “And she tried to have sex with him! Holy shit, that’s right. He had to practically beat her off with a stick.”

“Yeah, well, that’s what I keep thinking about. Kyle had talked to his therapist about it at the time and she said that people who are grieving often do inappropriate things because their emotions are so fucked up that they get everything all confused. The grieving emotions get confused for sex or lust sometimes...”

“You think that’s what happened with Sam last night?”

“I don’t know Syd and I wish to God I did. But I can tell you that I’ve never had somebody who wanted to sleep with me kiss me like that. It was so weird and totally not sexy. I don’t know how to describe it” she shook her head, frustrated.

“So what are you gonna do?”

“I’m going to give it a couple of days and see if Sam brings it up. I won’t hesitate to ask him about it and tell him exactly what’s up if he does. I’m not afraid to talk to him about it and tell him he was way the fuck out of bounds. But if he legit doesn’t remember doing it then I don’t see what good it will do to tell anybody about it. It all just disappears. So don’t fucking say anything, not even to Dom” she gave her bestie a stern look.

“It’s ok boo, your secret’s safe with me” Sydney smiled and pulled the brunette into a hug. “Fucking hell. What a jackass. Just remember, this is all on him, not you.”

//

Christmas Eve was wet and rainy with the temperature just a little too warm to snow. Josie had a cold so Ali and Ashlyn made the decision to stay home instead of schlepping all the way out to the Scott Krieger Christmas Eve gathering that evening. They both felt guilty about it but not for too long. The twins were both teething as well, very painful upper molars, so they were both a hot mess of tears and drool and bad moods. Only Drew was happy and healthy that night and Ali toyed with the idea of taking him to her Uncle’s house and leaving Ashlyn home with the little ones. But that hardly seemed fair. Taking care of one sick kid was tough, but to add in two fussy twins was just cruel. She offered to be the one to stay home but Ashlyn felt like Ali should be the one to go to Scott Krieger’s party if either of them went. At 3pm, after debating for the better part of two hours, they finally just agreed they would all stay at the big old house and try to have a nice, quiet Christmas Eve themselves. Ali was disappointed because Kyle and Nathan were actually going to Uncle Scott’s house for the first time in years and she was sad to miss it. It wasn’t too long before Deb found out about the sick and teething kiddos.

“Hell-ooo” Deb’s voice sing-songed sweetly from the mudroom door. “Anybody home?”

“We’re in here mom” Ali called out from the front living room. “I’d get up but...”

Deb poked her head into the front living room as she took off her boots, shrugged out of her coat and chuckled. Ali was laying in the corner of the couch with Josie tucked under her right arm, head on her chest, and Lily in the same position under her left arm. Persey was curled up near Josie’s legs, by Ali’s hip. Drew was sitting by the arm of the couch, leaning against Fred who had jumped up into the spot Ashlyn had vacated a few minutes ago when she brought Dodge upstairs to change his diaper. They were all watching Frosty the Snowman on the tv, transfixed and oblivious to almost everything but the freakishly perfect-looking snowman.

“Merry Christmas Eve my babies” Deb cooed with a huge grin on her face at the sight of so many of her favorite people.

“Grandma!” Drew said excitedly when he registered Deb in the doorway just to his left.

Deb came into the room and hugged and kissed Drew, then patted and kissed her two granddaughters, and finished with a peck to her daughter’s forehead. Persey wagged her tail until she got the pats she was looking for and Fred rolled over and gave Deb his belly to rub.

“Where’s Mike?” Ali asked after noticing he hadn’t followed her mother into the house.

“He’s just running to the store for me real quick. He’ll be right back” she replied as she picked up the empty snack plates from the coffee table. “Do you guys need anything while he’s there? Stop & Shop is open until 5pm. I can call him...”

“No, we’re all set. Thanks Mom.” The brunette smiled appreciatively at her mother. She didn’t want to call her because she knew she would come over and try to take care of them all and Ali really wanted her to enjoy their Christmas Eve. Deb and Mike would go to Ken’s house for Christmas Eve but they didn’t go to his brother’s house. They were going to attend a party at the condo complex, just for something new to do. But now that Deb was here, Ali was very happy to see her. “I just went shopping yesterday, are you sure we don’t have what you need already?”

“I’m sure. Unless you’ve got all the ingredients for my mother’s homemade chicken soup?” she grinned.

“Oh my God” Ali’s eyes flashed with excitement. “Don’t tease me mom. Are you really going to make Nonni’s chicken soup?”

“I wouldn’t tease you at a time like this” she nodded down at the two little girls who were literally clinging onto their mommy. There was a dark spot under each of their mouths where their drool was collecting on Ali’s chest. Lily’s because of her terrible teething and Josie’s because her nose was stuffed up and she had to breathe out of her mouth. They each had at least one of their hands balled up around a handful of Ali’s shirt and Lily even had a second handful up by her mommy’s shoulder. “Not about Nonni’s chicken soup.”

Deb cheated a little bit and used a rotisserie chicken that had already been cooked at the grocery store instead of cooking a whole chicken herself like she usually did. The soup wasn’t quite as good this way, but it saved two hours of the four-hour cooking time so she was willing to make the sacrifice so they could have the soup for dinner that night. 

“I’ve heard about your mother’s famous chicken soup Deb, and I had pretty high expectations” Ashlyn quirked an eyebrow at her mother-in-law as they all sat around the nook table. “And this did not disappoint” she smiled broadly and patted her belly. “That was delicious. Thank you so much for making it for us. I feel healthier and more immune than ever.”

It was so good that even Drew ate it without any cajoling or bartering involved. Dodge ate because he loved food even when his teeth were bothering him. But both girls were only mildly interested in eating anything. Both moms suspected that Lily was using her teething and mild fever as an excuse just to not eat her dinner but neither of them called her on it. After dinner and then bathtime they all gathered in the front living room again, Mike parking himself in the recliner with Drew snuggled adorably on his lap. Everybody else spread out on the couch with an under the weather kid on each lap. They watched several more Christmas specials on tv and then, instead of going upstairs to have one of their moms read to them before getting into bed, they stayed where they were while Deb read ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas’ to them. It was one of the little things Ali and Ashlyn had decided to do every year once Drew was born. Mike spun the recliner around so it faced the rest of the room so Drew could watch his Grandma as she read the beautifully illustrated, hard-cover picture book. 

It was a surprisingly peaceful ten minutes and Ashlyn gazed at her wife as they both listened to the words of the famous Christmas story. It was as if time had slowed down and everything was in slow-motion. The keeper spent some time watching each of her four children, all dressed in different Christmas themed pajamas. Ali had tried to get them all to wear the same exact jammies, red and green long-sleeved and long-legged two-piece sets with scenes from ‘How the Grinch Stole Christmas’ all over them. But neither girl wanted to give up their pretty purple and pink pajamas with ‘Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer’ and friends – Lily, or Cindy-loo Who from the Grinch – Josie. Ali took a little comfort knowing that at least Cindy-loo Who went along with the boys’ Grinch themed jammies. Ashlyn smiled when Ali, with Josie across her lap, winked back at her. They were both thinking the same thing. How unbelievably lucky were they to have so much love in their lives? These four little humans were so much work but provided so much love in return. And the two older humans who had come to their rescue that night were just as important in the equation. This was love. This was family. This was what it was all about. 

Ashlyn and Ali both knew they had a long night ahead of them wrapping Santa’s presents and filling the stockings and building and assembling some of the bigger toys. They had hours of work to do. And that was assuming that all three little kids stayed asleep in their sickness and discomfort, which was definitely not going to happen. Both moms knew they would get up multiple times with two or three kids, only to be woken up probably a little bit before 7am by a well-rested and eager Drew. But Ashlyn pushed all that from her mind and tried just to enjoy the sound of Deb’s voice and the sight of her beautiful family in front of her. She concentrated on the gentle caresses she was spreading around Dodge’s back as he lay next to her with his head in her lap. She felt her whole body relax in those ten minutes while Deb read the story. It hadn’t been anybody’s idea of a perfect Christmas Eve. But, as usual, the Krieger family just took it in stride and made the best of it. The blonde felt the stare of her wife and lifted her eyes to meet her favorite whiskey colored ones. They shared a tender, loving look that touched them both deeply. None of this would have been possible without the beautiful woman staring back...none of it. As much as they put the focus of Christmas onto their young children, both Ali and Ashlyn felt the miracle of Christmas deeply between the two of them. The way they celebrated Christmas Eve together had certainly changed over the years, but not the feelings of love and desire that coursed back and forth between them. That would never change.


	18. Floor Play

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut warning

Christmas Day was busy and full of laughter and tears and tantrums, but mostly love and happiness. After the hubbub of the early morning present-fest had died down, Ashlyn snuck out to the office in the garage for a few minutes to record her annual video for the Mental Health Initiative. Aside from May, ‘Mental Health Awareness month’, and ‘Suicide Prevention Day’ on September 10th which actually turned into a full week observance, Christmas was the busiest time for the MHI. The holidays were always difficult for millions of people for a lot of different reasons. The keeper had gotten such a great response from the video the first time she had posted one on Christmas Day that she kept on doing it. It wasn’t anything fancy. Ashlyn just spoke into her phone camera and wished everybody a good day. That was all she was asking the universe for – just a good day, especially for those that were struggling. She was honest and sincere and told everybody how lucky she felt. Then she told them how not all of her Christmases had been happy ones and she understood that sometimes just getting through the day itself was a huge accomplishment. She posted it on her social media as well as the MHI website and made her way back into the sweet bedlam that awaited her in the big old house.

The holiday season had almost slipped by without a trip to see the Nutcracker, but it was Ali who came to the rescue with tickets to the ballet on closing night. It was Monday, December 30th and the brunette had called in her father and Vicki to help them out. Deb and Mike had gone back to Miami to celebrate New Year’s Eve at the club as they loved to do. But Ken and Vicki had a Grandpa sleepover for all four grandkids. Josie’s cold had gone away after three days and none of the other kids had gotten sick after her. The twins were still teething but if it got too bad Ali had told her dad and Vicki to give them some children’s Tylenol to help them sleep that night. Yes, it was technically drugging their babies to insure a restful night for everybody, babies included. And both moms were ok with that every once in a while. 

“Are you ready for more, sexy?” the brunette purred as she leaned in and pressed a warm kiss to Ashlyn’s mound, scratching at the short hairs with her fingertips and moaning just a little bit from her position in her favorite spot.

“Goddamn woman” Ashlyn panted out, trying to catch her breath after the big orgasm that had just rocked her system. “If I...ever...say no to... that question...” she swallowed as her wife’s fingers continued gently caressing her, “please check...my birthmark...”

Ali laughed out loud and then giggled in an attempt to be quiet, only to laugh even louder when she remembered they were the only two people in the house that night and she could be as loud as she wanted. Ashlyn laughed too, unable to resist the sound of her wife’s deep belly laugh. She brought her left hand down to play with Ali’s hair, head still on her thigh, and grinned when she felt the brunette push her long right leg, tented over her mid-section, out a little wider.

“Whew!” Ali chuckled as she inspected the soft skin of Ashlyn’s inner, upper leg. She leaned over and kissed the light brown birthmark that graced the delicate skin where her right leg met her crotch. It was the size of a nickel and shaped mostly like a square but with fluid edges. She had been born with it but it wasn’t like Josie’s giraffe spot, it was just a regular old birthmark like so many people had in different places on their bodies. It was very faint and Ali hadn’t even noticed it the first time they had sex. It had taken her until after round three the night of their very first date at the big old house. That had been when they literally explored every inch of skin on the other’s body and then worshipped it. “Found it” she kissed it again and gave it a playful little lick. “It’s really you” she giggled and hummed in satisfaction. “Thank God.”

It was silly and stupid but it was one of those goofy things you shared with only your lover. Ali and Ashlyn had a joke or, really, just a playful scenario that they had come up with back in those heady days of their new relationship. They couldn’t even remember who started talking about it first or why it had come up – other than they had watched a show about aliens together. After some discussion they agreed on what hidden mark or feature they would use on one another’s bodies to distinguish them from an alien clone who had been sent to earth in a bodysnatching situation. How would Ali know it was really Ashlyn and not an alien masquerading as the sexy keeper? Ali had chosen the tiny birthmark that she herself had missed at first. Ashlyn had chosen the three small moles that formed the rough shape of a triangle, barely an inch long at each leg, that was located low on Ali’s left ass cheek. They were little moles, light brown and flat against her soft skin down where her ass met the back of her thigh. The brunette had teased her then girlfriend mercilessly about not being able to get her mind off of her ass. The alien joke had faded over the years, other less carefree and silly topics of conversation taking its place in their quiet times together. But every once in a while one of them would trot it out for another round of silly laughter. The fact that Ashlyn had included it in their kid-free and obligation-free night together was a perfect throwback to their early years. It filled them both with nostalgia and happy memories and sweet laughter. Nobody else on the planet knew about that dumb joke but the two of them and that’s what made it so awesome.

“So my answer is hell yes then!” Ashlyn laughed, her breathing much closer to normal. 

The keeper pulled her wife up so she was laying on her chest, grin to grin. Ashlyn brought their lips together in a sweet, romantic kiss as they giggled over the alien flashback. They kissed some more, loving the fact that they didn’t have to rush through the slower, sweeter moments they enjoyed so much when they were naked together.

“Are you sure you’re not tired?” Ali asked softly, placing slow, gentle kisses on her wife’s cheeks and forehead and nose and chin.

“Al, I’m always tired, just like you are” she giggled and sighed contentedly at the sweet kisses she was receiving. “But I want to make the most of tonight. Let’s be tired tomorrow.”

It was already almost 1am. They had each enjoyed two orgasms after getting home from The Nutcracker that evening and it would be a good time to call it a night and get some sleep.

“I was hoping you’d feel that way” Ali purred as a smile appeared on her face that was, somehow, sweet and sultry at the same time. She paused for a second, face hovering above Ashlyn’s. It was that fleeting moment before things got all hot and bothered again, when there was still sweet romance in the airspace around them. The brunette tilted her head just a bit as she gazed down at her beautiful keeper’s face. She cupped Ashlyn’s cheek with one hand, brushing her cheekbone with her thumb and smiling softly at her. “I love you so much Ash.”

“I love you too baby” the blonde replied, her face melting into a shy, lovestruck, smile. 

They let the moment last for a few more seconds before the skin on skin contact and gentle caresses changed from romance to lust as it so often did. Their kisses turned hungry again and their hands began groping and exploring hot flesh as their moans filled the room.

“I wanna play a game with you” Ali suggested breathlessly after a long, steamy makeout session.

“Oh yeah, what do you have in mind, beautiful?” Ashlyn asked as she lifted her thigh up just enough to put pressure on her wife’s already wet again center.

“Mmmmmm...” she hummed at the new sensation, closing her eyes for a second. “I might have gotten us another Christmas present” she purred again, bringing their lips together again.

“Really?” Ashlyn smirked, her voice low and turned on. She rolled them over so she was on top, unable to hide her excitement. “What is it? Where is it?” she sucked on Ali’s neck in between questions, making the brunette whimper.

They had exchanged their private, intimate gifts for each other two nights ago, waiting until Josie was feeling and sleeping better. They had hurriedly enjoyed the assortment of warming lip gloss, tingle balm, more honey dust, and a ridiculous candy g-string that the keeper had insisted Ali wear while they experimented. It was like those necklaces you bought when you were a kid, only the candy beads were strung up like a g-string to cover the brunette’s neatly trimmed curls. Ashlyn grinned lasciviously as she thought back to that evening. They hadn’t gone crazy because they were sure one of the twins would wake up from teething pain at any moment. They also knew they had their Nutcracker night coming up and that made it easier to keep things a little bit in check.

“My closet” Ali replied through her own grin, getting excited by the look on her wife’s face. “On the shelf, to the left, behind my sweatshirts...” she giggled as she watched Ashlyn jump off of the bed and quickly cover the short distance to the closet, by the head of the bed on Ali’s side.

“Bingo!” the blonde’s jubilant voice filled the room as she carried the gift-wrapped box back to the bed. It was the size of an actual board game only thicker, about a foot square and eight inches deep or thick. “Wait a minute” she scrunched her face up as she plopped onto the bed, shaking the box lightly and holding it near her ear. “This isn’t, like, ‘Trivial Pursuit’ or some damn thing, is it?”

Ali laughed out loud, her short, sharp, shout of a laugh that seemed to carry for miles. She had the hugest, nose-crinkling grin on her face as she watched her keeper adoringly.

“No...not quite” she stuck her chin out and up as she grinned. “Why don’t you open it and see?” she asked coyly, reaching out a foot to poke the blonde’s hip.

“Why didn’t you give me this the other night?” the keeper asked as she started to tear off the wrapping paper.

“Well” Ali shrugged, “I knew we couldn’t use it before tonight...and” she paused, self-consciously, “I don’t know if you’ll like it so I just thought it could be a little extra present this year, for both of us. If you like it.”

“Oh I’m gonna like it” Ashlyn bent over and kissed Ali’s knee. “I can tell by that shy look on your beautiful face.”

They took a few minutes, both women reaching for their glasses so they could read the instructions, and explored the new game. It was called ‘Floor Play’ and it was just a big box with thin, quarter-inch foam pieces in it that you could assemble to form a big mat on the floor. It was dark purple and each piece of the foam mat was about eleven inches square. Each square had a circular foam disk in the center of it that you could take out and replace with any of the 20 other pieces. Those foam disks were light purple and had different sexy activities stamped on each one. There were three or four different games you could play and you would shape or build the mat accordingly. Tic-tac-toe used nine squares and to win you had to successfully complete the activity on three squares in a row, just like getting your x’s or o’s in tic-tac-toe. There was a game called Toss It where you set up the mat however you wanted and tossed one of the game chips onto a square and then performed that activity on your partner. Whichever game you chose you could decide to keep the light purple circular disks face up or face down for a surprise.

“So what do you think?” the bashful look was back on the brunette’s face again.

“I think this is gonna be fun” Ashlyn smirked wickedly as she got on her hands and knees and kissed her wife’s lips. “Come on!”

Ashlyn leapt off the bed over on her own side and pushed the gliding chair and footstool up into the corner near the door to the backstairs. She pulled the chair from the dressing table out of the way, leaving it between the foot of the bed and the low dresser there as she tried to create as much floor space as possible. Their bedroom was good for a lot of things, but open floor space wasn’t really one of them. Ali’s side of the bed was worse, not nearly as wide. When she was done she had created about five feet by eight feet of space next to the bed. It would just have to do. They briefly discussed going to a different room but neither woman wanted to leave the cozy atmosphere of their bedroom.

“Besides, one of these says ‘use a toy to excite your lover’ and those are all in here” Ashlyn chuckled. “Why don’t you grab the toy box, now that I’m thinking about it.”

The game they decided on was called Path to Ecstasy and it was pretty simple. They each created a row of six squares and linked them all together like the puzzle pieces they were. The squares all fit together like any of the kids’ floor puzzles they had used over the years. They used extra squares on each side just to make it a big mat. They decided, bravely, to just mix up all the circular activity disks and put them face down so their paths to ecstasy would be random. It would either be really awesome, or not. You were allowed to choose whatever disks you wanted, to insure a satisfactory adventure. But they both thought it sounded more fun to add a little element of surprise to it.

“Ok, who goes first?”

“Why don’t you go first babe, you seem awfully excited” Ali chuckled and hugged her adorable wife from behind as they stood by the bathroom door near the foot of the bed and looked at their set up. There were six squares in front of each one of them, set up in a row or column that finished near the backstairs door by the head of the bed.

“You know it” the keeper replied and turned in Ali’s arms to bring their lips together again. “You naked is always exciting to me...always” she mumbled against the brunette’s lips as the kiss turned passionate and hungry.

They broke apart a few minutes later, both ready for more and not really needing any ‘floor play’ to get things going between them. But they were determined to try their new game on their rare night alone.

“’Suck your lover’s toes or fingers’” Ashlyn read out as she flipped over the first round disk in Ali’s row. “Hell yes” she smirked. “Don’t mind if I do.”

She moved to where Ali was sitting on the edge of the bed, right next to the big mat, picked up her hand and teasingly brought it to her mouth. The official rules of the game suggested that you and your partner lie on the mat for all of the games that required prone positions. But they weren’t 18-years old anymore. They were going to use their big comfy bed, thank you very much. They were prepared to be overtired tomorrow, but they weren’t interested in having sore backs or knees or shoulder blades or elbows too. Ali was relieved when her wife took her hand because she really wasn’t crazy about feet. But right at the last second, Ashlyn dropped to her knees, lifted the brunette’s left leg up and began seductively licking her toes while she massaged her foot with both hands. 

“Ash!” Ali yelped in surprise when she felt the sudden change in sucking plans. “Don’t...” but before she could continue her complaint, the feeling of comfort and warmth that surrounded her entire foot pushed the self-consciousness and discomfort away. 

Ashlyn knew her wife enjoyed having her feet rubbed so she smartly included that with the sucking right off the bat. She dug her thumb into the arch of the brunette’s foot and felt her leg quiver. That’s when she knew she had made the right move. 

“Mmmmmmm...” Ali moaned, despite herself. 

The rules were vague about how long each activity should last so the blonde kept up the foot massage and toe sucking until she knew Ali was close to getting self-conscious again. The massage could only mask the toe-sucking for so long and they both knew it.

“I don’t know why you’re so weird about that” Ashlyn mumbled as she moved her mouth up the top of her wife’s foot to her ankle and shin. “I love your feet” she reminded the brunette as she stopped her mouth at Ali’s knee, pressing one last kiss into her warm skin and smiling up at her.

“I know you do honey” Ali replied softly, hand cupping her wife’s cheek. “Thank you.”

Ashlyn turned her head and kissed Ali’s palm before moving on her knees back to the foam mat behind her.

“Let’s see what’s next” her voice was still full of enthusiasm. “’Tickle and tease your lover’... hmmm, that’s pretty open to interpretation now isn’t it?” she smirked at Ali.

“Oh boy” Ali rolled her eyes playfully from her spot on the edge of the bed and chuckled. “There has to be a time limit” she suggested as Ashlyn climbed onto her lap, straddling her thighs and smirking even more. “Seriously” the brunette leaned back with her hands on the bed behind her and tried to keep a straight face as her wife quirked an eyebrow at her.

“Baby, there are four more squares after this one. I’m not going to torture you just to torture you” she shook her head slowly from side to side as she used both hands and pushed all of the brunette hair back over both shoulders. “You just keep your hands back there and don’t move. Let me work” her eyes were getting dark and filling with desire.

Ashlyn brought both of her hands to the top of Ali’s thighs and just barely touched the skin there, her fingertips light and delicate as they ghosted up to her hips. She knew she was doing it right because the brunette’s skin broke into goosebumps immediately and she shut her eyes and let her head drop back with a quiet moan at the incredible sensation.

“Shit...” Ali breathed out, her head still back.

The keeper moved her long fingers up both of her wife’s sides, occasionally spicing it up with her thumbs grazing her abdomen or her ribs or the underside of her breasts. She felt herself get wet when she saw Ali’s nipples start to harden without even being touched.

“Fuck you’re amazing baby” she whispered as her fingers moved to the top of Ali’s breasts, covering her collar bone and shoulders in soft, barely-there, touches.

Ali felt her wife’s juices on her thigh and groaned loudly.

“Jesus Ash, you’re so wet” she moaned out as she brought her head back up to look at her sexy wife on her lap. “Fuck” she arched her back, looking for more contact.

Ashlyn pulled her hands back to account for Ali’s chest being closer to her after the arch. She hadn’t expected that but shouldn’t have been surprised. Ali may have been new to a lot of things when they had started having sex together but she had never been shy about going after something she wanted. It was part of what made her such an eager participant in any new things the keeper had suggested over the years. Ashlyn moved her fingertips around each breast in a slow, circular pattern, barely touching the skin. When she had finally gotten the circles to the areola she leaned down and blew lightly on first one nipple and then the next. Ali had been expecting her mouth and was disappointed when she didn’t get it. But the slight tingling sensation she felt instead was wonderful and made her dark nipples get even harder. The keeper kept up her featherlight touches, teasing her wife until she saw the flush creep up Ali’s chest and start to move towards her neck. She knew the brunette was getting really worked up. As soon as Ashlyn saw that happen she abruptly stopped what she was doing and moved her hands back to her own thighs, watching Ali panting slightly as she opened her eyes to see what had caused the interruption.

“Tickled and teased and turned on, I’d say” Ashlyn smirked again, enjoying the frustrated stare her wife was giving her.

“God that’s mean” she whined, her voice low and thick.

“Let’s see what’s next” Ashlyn stood up again, noticing the wet spot she left on her wife’s thigh. She lost her focus for a second when she watched Ali slide her fingers through it and then put them in her own mouth. “Right, umm...ok...”

“Everything ok hon?” Ali purred, knowing she had just made her wife’s job a little bit harder.

“Yep, all good” she smiled and tried to get the control back again. “Square number three says, ‘Put a body topping on your lover and lick it off’, yesssss...”

The blonde wasted no time sprinting down to the kitchen and was back by the side of the bed in less than two minutes flat. 

“I brought this up for you for later, just in case” she explained as she put the half can of chocolate frosting on her nightstand.

“You just did that so it has a chance to warm up by the time I use it on you” Ali chuckled and smacked her wife’s arm. “But I won’t have the same luxury, will I?” she challenged with a smirk of her own.

“Nope” the keeper grinned mischievously and held up the can of whipped cream she had gotten from the refrigerator with the already opened can of frosting. “Sorry, not sorry” she shrugged and made a face at her still-smiling wife. “Lay back now baby...” she cooed as she got onto the bed and waited for Ali to lay flat on her back. “I will let you choose the spot though” she offered sweetly, leaning down to quickly kiss her wife’s lips.

“How chivalrous of you” Ali chuckled and stole another kiss before Ashlyn pulled back and into position on her knees next to the brunette. “You pick babe, it’s your turn, I trust you.”

Ashlyn shook the can several times and popped the cap off, carefully placing it on the nightstand so it wouldn’t get lost in all the fun. 

“I think we’ll just keep it simple this time” she licked her lips slowly as she pressed the nozzle and heard the unmistakable sound of whipped cream foaming out of the can. The line of whipped cream was a foot long and went from Ali’s belly button up to the underside of her breasts. The brunette squealed when she felt the cold sensation on her skin. “Sorry baby, let me take care of this right away for you” the keeper grinned wickedly.

“Hurry up” Ali giggled as her skin erupted in goosebumps again and she grabbed the bedsheets with both hands to keep herself from wiping the cold cream off.

“Just settle down, bossy” the keeper chuckled, unable to resist the charm of her beautiful, naked, goosebump-covered wife waiting expectantly for her mouth. It was one of those images that would stay in her head forever. Thank God. “Mmmmmmm...so delicious...” she moaned as she started at Ali’s belly button and began licking the whipped cream from her warm body. Ali was writhing underneath her by the time she had finished up near her breasts. “That tastes so fucking good” Ashlyn groaned as she hovered above her wife, mouth finally coming up after completing its delectable task. She couldn’t hide the look of desire in her eyes as she stared down at the brunette. “The whipped cream wasn’t bad either.”

“This is taking too long” Ali whimpered as she reached for Ashlyn, only to have the keeper quickly move off the bed and back to the squares on the floor. “Let’s just stop at three and now I’ll do yours. Otherwise we’ll be here all night...”

“And there’s the beauty of the plan” Ashlyn interrupted with a playful wink. “But I get your point, I’ll go faster.”

It was late and this was fun but she still had three to go for Ali and then all six activities for Ali to perform on her after that. 

“Ok, but you’d better or I’m just going to forget all about this game and get back to what I really want...” the brunette threatened.

“’Kiss like it’s the first time’” Ashlyn read the next circular disk and couldn’t help but smile. “Oh man, that’s tough” she raised her eyebrows at her wife who had moved back to the edge of the bed. 

“Don’t tell me you don’t know which kiss was our real first kiss?” Ali tilted her head and raised her eyebrows.

“No way baby, I know our February kiss was the real first kiss. Although I’ve always felt bad for the World Cup kiss because it was fucking amazing and we just totally shut it down. It deserved better” Ashlyn suggested as she remembered back to her bedroom in the apartment she shared with Whitney their first season in Boston.

“Well let’s do that one then” Ali shrugged. “You’re right, it was a hell of a kiss. I’ll never forget it, that’s for sure.”

The brunette stood up and met her keeper on the mat, both of them grinning.

“Technically we should be drunk for this one” Ashlyn chuckled. “But even though that was the excuse we used I still wanted to kiss you that night” she admitted quietly as they wrapped their arms around each other and stood face to face. “I wanted to do a lot more than kiss you that night.”

“You never told me that” Ali’s eyes went wide at the revelation, 9-1/2 years later. “I mean, we’ve talked about both wanting to kiss each other before and blaming the alcohol for our moment of weakness, but I didn’t know you wanted more” she bit her bottom lip as she pulled her keeper in tighter, her arms up around the blonde’s neck.

Ashlyn wound her arms around Ali’s waist and held her close, replicating their position from that July 5th night when the USWNT won the 2015 WWC. They had both gotten drunk at the afterparty and Whitney and Ashlyn had taken Ali back to their apartment to crash for the night. But a rookie teammate had already claimed the couch, leaving the two new friends sharing space in Ashlyn’s bedroom. Ali had left the room to change into Ashlyn’s borrowed clothes for the night and when she came back into the bedroom the keeper was standing there topless, too drunk to figure out how to get her sleep t-shirt on. There had been no discussion, just a funny joke and then a not so subtle suggestion and then the best kiss of either of their lives, up to that point.

“I love how you still don’t seem to understand the effect you have on me” Ashlyn smiled softly, her mouth an inch away from the brunette’s. “I’m glad we didn’t go any further that night because it would probably have been incredibly hot but you deserved so much better than drunk sex, no matter how good it would have been.”

“God you’re sweet to me” Ali smiled and shook her head in amazement as she listened to her wonderful wife. “Now kiss me.”

The kiss wasn’t as electrifying as it had been back then. But there was no way it possibly could have been. There was no way to duplicate the charge of the illicit kiss, and all of the electricity that passed between them that night. But their kisses still felt electric, even after all those years. There was just something about the two of them together. They were made to be together and the sparks that still flew between them were just further proof that even science and nature were behind their union. As they pulled apart after the short but powerful kiss they shared a knowing look. Yes, that kiss and that night had been important and unforgettable for both of them. But they wouldn’t go back for anything. They wouldn’t trade their present or their future for one moment of the past, no matter how good most of it had been. They rested their foreheads together while Ali played with the short hair at the back of her wife’s neck.

“Now who’s taking too long?” the keeper teased.

“Shut it Harris” the brunette replied, using the nickname she had loved so much when they were single.

“Ok” she sighed, “but I want the record to show that it’s not all my fault that this is taking a long time...”

“Fine” Ali giggled and gave her another kiss, not letting her go.

Ashlyn opened her eyes as the kiss ended but the embrace did not. She reached out with her bare foot and worked her big toe into the crevice between the circular foam disk and the foam square. After a couple of attempts she got her toe where she wanted it and flipped the next round disk over.

“’Give a playful spanking’” they both laughed loudly when the keeper read it out loud.

“Oh geez” Ali rolled her eyes as Ashlyn promptly sat on the edge of the bed and patted her lap. “Actually, this may end up working in my favor...” she teased her keeper.

“What do you mean?” Ashlyn gave her a curious glance as the brunette settled her stomach across her wife’s strong thighs, her gorgeous ass up and ready.

“Oh please, you can’t help yourself with my ass, babe” Ali let out a low, throaty chuckle as she tried to turn her head to see Ashlyn’s face. “This will be the last activity we do and that’s just fine with me.” Her words were laced with desire and lust as she could feel how excited the blonde was. “I’ve got things I want to do to you, All-star.”

Challenge accepted, Ashlyn thought to herself as she tried to steel her mind. Ali was right about her ass being the keeper’s true weakness. But they were going to finish this game and this playful spanking wasn’t going to derail anything. The payoff would come at the end, for both of them.

“Well you’re just gonna have to wait your turn” Ashlyn said sweetly as she brought her hand down suddenly onto Ali’s bare ass cheek.

“Oh!” she yelped in surprise and then chuckled. “Whatever you say” she giggled and stuck her ass up even higher.

Ashlyn took her time and gave her four more spanks, each one getting a little bit harder. She loved the way Ali’s ass jiggled after each impact. The keeper moved her hand around both cheeks and was careful not to spend too much time in any one place. The spanks weren’t love taps but they also weren’t really hard enough to do more than leave a slight pink mark on the creamy skin. They hadn’t done a lot of spanking or other S&M activities because those things just didn’t appeal to either one of them very much. There had definitely been previous playful spankings so this wasn’t new for them. Ashlyn loved it because it brought her close to her favorite part of Ali’s body, and Ali loved it because it was fun and easy to tease her wife and get her all worked up.

“Was it good for you sweetheart” the brunette flirted with a sassy wag of her ass before she stood up, chuckling.

“It’s always good for me” she replied, gently caressing Ali’s butt cheeks as the brunette stood next to her. She bent her head down and kissed her wife’s ass for good measure. “You know that.”

“Well time’s up lover” she laughed, emphasizing the word lover and making fun of the nickname nobody really used seriously. “Shake a leg. I want my turn.”

She moved out of Ashlyn’s reach and stood in front of the 6th and final square in her row, impatiently tapping her toe on the light purple circle in the center of it.

“Alright, alright” Ashlyn chuckled and turned the circle over to reveal her 6th and final activity. “’Lick below the waist’, yes please!”

The positioning couldn’t have been more opportune with Ali standing right in front of the square and Ashlyn on her knees right in front of her. Before the brunette could even open her mouth to tease or taunt her wife, Ashlyn took a step forward on her knees and dragged her tongue through Ali’s wet folds. She put her left arm behind Ali’s lower back to hold her up and keep her in place while she used her right arm to move her left leg out wider, partially supporting it until Ali got her balance back again.

“Holy shit!” Ali exclaimed, completely taken aback by the sudden maneuver. She put both hands on Ashlyn’s head to try and keep her balance. “Fuck Ash... mmmmmmm...”

Ashlyn kept up her licks, just teasing her wife’s entrance with no intention of going any further, and just as she felt the tell-tale quiver of Ali’s leg she put both hands on her hips to steady her and pushed herself back away from her scrumptious treat.

“Your turn!” she announced with a twinkle in her eye and a lot of the brunette on her nose and chin.

“Ughh” Ali groaned as she tried to snap out of the pleasurable fog she was just in. “You’re the absolute worst” she complained as she stood there, thankful for Ashlyn’s strong hands on her hips as she got her footing again. “I’ll remember that” she promised as she strutted past the blonde and bent over to reveal the first activity in Ashlyn’s row. She made sure the keeper got an eyeful of her still pink ass as she did so.

The first two activities were fairly straightforward and Ali completed them quickly and easily. She ‘nibbled her lover’s nipples’ and then ‘blindfolded her lover and teased them’. She had gone so far as to get the feather tickler out of the toybox to get maximum torture without spending too much time. She took a lot of pleasure seeing her wife, writhing on the bed with a dark blue sleep mask style blindfold still in place, her body covered in goosebumps and her nipples hard as diamonds. Her thighs were pressed closely together and Ali knew she was trying to get some pressure between her legs to relieve the ache she had just caused. 

“I told you I’d get you back” she laughed seductively into Ashlyn’s ear as she crawled up her body to remove the blindfold. “You can move your hands again now too. Such a good girl...”

Ashlyn launched into action as soon as she heard Ali’s words, flipping them over backwards and pinning her wife to the bed as she kissed her passionately and almost desperately. Their heads were down at the foot of the bed now.

“Stop” Ali giggled as soon as the blonde’s lips had moved from her mouth to her throat. “Come on babe, no cheating. I behaved myself...”

“Yeah, well you went first too. Everything’s harder now” she gasped out as she tried to kiss her again.

“No, Ashlyn now cut it out” she raised her voice and wrestled one of her hands free, pushing the keeper away. “I’ve got four more activities and I’m going to enjoy each fucking one” she said seriously as she felt her wife give up.

“Fine, but...please, if you love me at all, just hurry the fuck up...please baby...”

“I’ll take as long as it takes Ashlyn” she rolled off the bed and stood on the mat, right in front of the third square. “No shortcuts, no substitutions, no nothing” she joyfully teased the frustrated blonde. She savored the loving look they shared for just a few seconds, making sure her girl was really ok, before bending down and turning over the next disc. “’Explore a forbidden area on your lover’s body’” she got a little pale as she finished reading. 

There was only one place on either of their bodies that hadn’t already been explored plenty by tongues, lips, fingers, hands and toys. The brunette hadn’t seen this disc when they were unwrapping everything and getting the mat set up. If she had, maybe she wouldn’t have just given that great speech about not cutting any corners and no substitutions. She swallowed hard and looked at her keeper when she heard Ashlyn’s soft voice.

“Listen, Al, this is just fun and you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do” she propped herself up on her elbow as she lay stretched out on her side along the length of the bed. Her head was down near the foot of the bed and her feet were up by the pillows. “Seriously honey, I’ll just pretend I didn’t hear that big fancy speech you just made” she teased lightly, hoping to get a smile from her beautiful brunette.

Ali had been relieved to hear her kind-hearted wife give her permission to skip this one. Ashlyn was always so kind and considerate with her, no matter what. Just as she was about to offer to substitute a different activity from one of the other squares they hadn’t planned to use, she heard the keeper’s tease about her big fancy speech. That was a challenge if she had ever heard one and she had heard plenty from the daring blonde. Ali would do it. She had to do it. Ashlyn would never let her live it down if she bailed now. More importantly, she would never be able to live with herself if she quit now. Besides, she thought to herself as she swallowed hard again and tried to settle her nerves, it was Ashlyn’s magnificent body. There was no part of it that she didn’t love. It seemed odd to think about loving her wife’s asshole but that was where she was at in this particular moment. What’s the big deal? Ali had already helped her massage the perineal area while she was pregnant with the twins. It was just so much easier to reach when you weren’t the huge preggo trying to do it. And yes, technically, that was just the area between her vagina and her anus, but that was still very close to the forbidden zone. They both licked and sucked the perineum when they ate each other out. It was just the bottom of the vulva as far as your tongue and mouth were concerned. The brunette took another deep breath, rallied and then met her wife’s cautiously optimistic eyes.

“Yeah, fuck you and your asshole too” Ali finally answered with a defiant smirk. Her jaw was set and she had fire in her eyes as she approached the bed.

“For real sweetheart” Ashlyn sat up and tried again to convince her wife that she was only teasing her. “I know how you feel about anal and I don’t want you to explore anything you don’t want to. Just pick another activity or skip this one or something...”

The tenderness in her wife’s voice chased away the few remaining thoughts of the previous teasing and Ali felt much more sure of her decision. She sat on the edge of the bed and took Ashlyn’s hand and brought it to her lips for a kiss.

“Explore doesn’t mean anything more than explore, right?” she asked with a small smile.

“Ali, you don’t have to prove anything to me. I don’t care that you just got all high and mighty about taking your time and all of that” she moved her body closer to the brunette’s and curled around her as Ali sat on the edge of the bed. “It’s really funny and the timing couldn’t be any better” she grinned. “But let’s just laugh about that and move on to the next thing.”

“No, Ash, I wanna do it” she said quietly. “I mean, not it, it...just explore...is that ok?”

“Anything you want is ok baby. But I don’t want you to feel pressured into anything either. This is supposed to be fun and if you’re not having fun then we should move on to the next one” she reasoned carefully, kissing her wife’s knee in front of her while rubbing her lower back and hip as she was curled around her.

“Maybe it will be fun” the brunette shrugged, feeling her confidence boost again. Ashlyn had always had a way of making her feel like she could do anything, especially with the blonde by her side. “We won’t know if we don’t try, right?”

“Alright Al, you’re the boss” she agreed, playing into the position of power and hoping to build up her wife’s confidence even more. “I am putty in your hands...your sweet, beautiful, talented hands...” she winked as she rolled onto her back, leaving her hand in Ali’s lap to maintain their physical contact.

The brunette got on her knees and moved between her wife’s legs, feeling Ashlyn’s eyes on her the whole time. She bent one of the keeper’s legs up at the knee and pressed a few kisses into her thigh as she did so. She did the same thing with her other leg and just as she started to get nervous she was struck by how beautiful her keeper was. She let her eyes scan for the stretchmarks and the scars, both surgical and natural, taking everything in and smiling broadly despite her slight discomfort at the idea of getting personal with her asshole. But, honestly, it was beautiful too. She had a momentary flashback to helping Ashlyn apply Preparation-H to her hemorrhoid and that had definitely not been beautiful. But all that had mattered to her at that time had been to help her girl feel better and ease her suffering. Just as quickly as the image had appeared in her brain, it was gone again, and the brunette was looking at one of her favorite sights in the world – Ashlyn’s gorgeous pussy. The keeper was very wet, still tremendously turned on from the blindfolded teasing session she had just endured. Ali felt the familiar tug in her core and moved her mouth down the blonde’s thigh and into her soaked folds.

“Oh fuck...” Ashlyn closed her eyes and tried to keep her breathing steady as the amazing sensation threatened to make her lose her goddamned mind. “Yeah, baby, that feels soooo good.”

The brunette knew that eating her wife out was not the activity on the disc, but she also knew that she really wanted to taste her and that it always made her feel good when her face was between Ashlyn’s legs. The keeper didn’t seem to mind and sure wasn’t complaining. Ali continued feasting on her keeper, working her tongue up and down from the bottom of her slit, next to the perineum, up to her clit where she swirled her tongue around the sensitive nub and pressed a soft kiss to it.

“Jesus Christ Al...fuck that feels good...” Ashlyn moaned loudly as she buried her hands into her wife’s soft brown hair.

Ali was about to lose herself in her keeper’s sweetness and add her fingers to the play so she could really give her an amazing orgasm when she remembered why she was down there in the first place. She slowed down the licks and sucks, dragging her mouth all the way down to the bottom of her entrance again. She licked all the juices up that she could, including the plentiful ones that had dripped down towards her asshole. She pulled her face back so she could see what she was doing as she lay there on her stomach. She kissed the inside of Ashlyn’s thigh, turning her head to the side a bit but keeping her eyes on the puckered pink hole that was closed up tight. She took her finger and ran it up and down through Ashlyn’s juices, tapping her clit lightly in the process.

“You’re so gorgeous Ashlyn...” her voice was practically a whisper. “So fucking gorgeous...” she repeated, absentmindedly, as she continued getting her finger wet.

“I love you” the keeper grunted, the anticipation from the blindfolded teasing coupled with the wonderful things Ali had just done to her pussy making it hard for her to think at all.

The brunette really had no idea what to do now that she was down there, face to face with the one forbidden zone on her wife’s body. She had seen the porn clips all over the internet of women getting fucked up the ass but she hadn’t really bothered to look too closely. She knew that the asshole didn’t get wet so you had to use lube if you were going to stick anything in there. But that was literally the extent of her knowledge of anal sex. The whole concept of getting intimate with the place your shit passed through completely grossed her out. Ashlyn tilted her hips up, breaking the brunette’s train of thought and bringing her back to the challenge in front of her. Ali moved her mouth back to her wife’s pussy and licked up all of the new passion she had just spilled for her with a moan of her own.

“God you taste so fucking good...I could eat you up all night long” she mumbled into the blonde’s folds. “Mmmmmmmmm...”

Ashlyn brought one of her hands up to her own breasts and started playing with her nipples, tugging on them and pinching them as she kept getting more and more turned on. Ali, encouraged by her wife’s undulating body and deep, loud moans, moved her wet finger down through the perineum. She applied gentle pressure, knowing it felt good from having it done to herself during both of her pregnancies, and moved her finger back up to repeat the stroke a few more times. She was surprised to see Ashlyn’s tight hole quiver and open just a tiny bit before squeezing tight again. The brunette continued lower with her finger this time, spreading Ashlyn’s wetness down and circling her finger around her asshole. She felt it quiver beneath her fingertip and instinctively applied a little bit of pressure to it, causing a loud moan from her wife. Ali moved her other hand to the blonde’s center and began teasing her entrance. She kept her hand moving up there while she continued to explore below. Her finger could feel the extra passion starting to drip down from Ashlyn’s soaked folds and the brunette used it and spread it around the tight, puckering hole. Ali tapped slowly with her fingertip, watching her wife’s asshole respond with more quivering as she bucked her hips up hard.

“Fuck Ali! Fuck!!” the keeper shouted as she tugged on both breasts now, her chest rising and falling rapidly as her breathing got choppy.

“Does that feel good?” Ali asked, moving her eyes to Ashlyn’s face to watch her reply.

“Yes! Oh, fuck me baby...please, fuck me” she gasped out. “I can’t take it anymore, please...” she begged, eyes imploring the brunette as they stared at each other.

Ali watched her keeper bring her own hand down and start to circle her aching clit. Ashlyn moved slowly but with a purpose, tightening the circle until her fingers began to rub the bundle of nerves. Another groan escaped her lips and spurred the brunette on. She stopped pressing on and tapping at Ashlyn’s tight hole and got on her knees, a gush of wetness between her own thighs making her brush her other hand across her own clit just for a second. Ali remembered the only other thing about anal that she had heard Sydney and the other girls joking about earlier that summer during their big 40th birthday weekend. What Ali remembered was the cautionary story Jessie had told about the consequences of mixing holes. The brunette made sure not to put the tip of her index finger anywhere near the rest of her wife’s pussy. She knew she was being overcautious because she hadn’t actually entered her asshole, but better safe than sorry. 

“You are so fucking sexy babe” Ali husked out as she let the visual of her wife rubbing her own clit and pulling on her own nipples fill her mind and body. “Jesus fucking Christ Ashlyn...” she groaned as she pushed her two middle fingers into the blonde’s pulsing core.

“Unnhhhh...yessssss...fuuuuuucckkkk...” the keeper grunted as she arched her back and tried to rock her hips into Ali’s hand. “Don’t stop baby...unnnnhhhh...”

“I won’t sexy, I won’t stop...not until you’re coming all over me...fuck you’re incredible...Jesus...”

Ashlyn’s whole body shook under the powerful thrusts Ali delivered. The brunette ramped up her pace and her power until she was practically pounding into her keeper’s sopping wet pussy. Ashlyn increased the speed of her own fingers on her swollen clit and in another minute she screamed out as her orgasm crashed down on her.

“Aliiii!!!!!!!!”

The brunette launched herself up and into her wife’s outstretched arms, letting the blonde hold her tightly to her chest as she rocked and shook through her release. Ali buried her face into Ashlyn’s neck and pressed one hot kiss there after another, breathing her girl’s scent in deeply and riding out her high with her.

“I love you Ash” she whispered against her sweaty skin. “I love you. I love you...” she repeated over and over again as they held each other.

They fell asleep like that, Ashlyn pulling the sheet over them even though their heads were at the foot of the bed. In the morning they laughed about their position and the way they had both abandoned the game even though they had fought so hard for so long to complete it. 

“So you owe me a ‘Kiss your lover’s neck and earlobes’” Ashlyn read activity number four as she put the foam squares away once they had enjoyed their coffee in bed. “And a ‘Touch yourself to tease your lover’” the keeper wagged her eyebrows. “I looooove that. I’m definitely keeping track of this” she joked while she made a note in her phone.

“Where are you writing that?” Ali laughed as her eyes went wide. “Don’t forget how many children are in your life and they’re always trying to grab our phones, all the time.”

“Baby” Ashlyn frowned playfully and showed her the note screen in her phone. It said ‘neck/earlobe’ on one line and ‘my favorite’ on the next. “You’d better add ‘Wrestle playfully’ on the next line there for me while you’re in there” she chuckled at the 6th and final activity. 

“Well, I’m still sorry we got sidetracked” Ali admitted shyly. “But I think we stopped at a pretty good place.”

“I’ll say” Ashlyn wagged her eyebrows again.

They hadn’t talked about the forbidden zone yet. Ashlyn knew that her wife would talk to her about it when she was ready. It might be later that day it might be in a month, but it wouldn’t happen before Ali was good and ready. So the blonde was surprised an hour later, as they showered together, when her beautiful brunette brought it up so quickly. They were soaping each other up after getting the hair-washing out of the way first. They had to leave to go pick up the kids in an hour so it was understood that this shared shower was to enjoy touching each other but not in a carnal way. It was a PG-rated shower but they both loved it because they never got to do that anymore. It felt decadent and wonderful to be so close again.

“So...can I ask you some questions?” Ali tentatively broached the subject as she stood behind her wife, rubbing the bath pouf across her shoulders and back.

“Anything baby, you know that” Ashlyn replied sweetly as she reached down behind her and squeezed her wife’s thigh before giving it a reassuring pat.

It took Ali another minute to speak again but she was almost finished with the blonde’s back and would rather ask her the question when they weren’t standing face to face. She swallowed hard and blurted out her first question.

“Did it really feel good?” she began in a rush. “I mean, when I touched your...forbidden zone?”

It took all kinds of self-control for Ashlyn to hold in the laugh that threatened to fill the square, glass shower. She couldn’t get over how fucking cute her wife was.

“Ummm...yeah it felt good” she shrugged after getting her composure and actually thinking about Ali’s question. “It didn’t feel as good as when you touch my clit or anything else, but yeah, it felt good.”

“Did you want me to do it more?”

“Like more pressure or more...” Ashlyn tried to clarify, not wanting to answer incorrectly.

“No, like did you want me to keep doing what I was doing? Would it have felt better when you came if I had kept touching...it?”

The keeper turned to face her nervous wife, hoping to save the skin on her back from unplanned, torturous exfoliation. She grinned at Ali, who blushed as soon as they were face to face.

“Hi” Ashlyn leaned forward and gave her a soft, sweet kiss.

“Hi” Ali smiled into the kiss and felt her own shoulders relax just a bit.

“You did exactly what I wanted you to do, beautiful” she smiled at the brunette and reminded her to keep using the pouf on her front by moving Ali’s hand up and down her stomach twice, making them both chuckle. “That was a great orgasm and you made me feel fantastic...”

“Yeah, but...” Ali tried to interrupt her but Ashlyn jumped right back in.

“Just hold on, and I’ll tell you” she giggled and gave her another quick kiss. “What you did was the same as the only other sort of anal sex I’ve ever had. Just some tapping and different pressure and rubbing from the outside. I’m not even sure that qualifies” she chuckled. “It feels good and I think it’s because there are all kinds of nerve-endings there or something, I don’t really remember. I looked it up the first time somebody touched me like that because I couldn’t understand what I had felt or why.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, you’re not the only one who looks shit up” she smiled at the surprised look on Ali’s face.

“So...do you want me to start doing that?” the brunette asked, unable to meet her wife’s hazel eyes, and instead focusing on Ashlyn’s stomach and hip as she washed them with the bath pouf.

“No, honey, I don’t” she shook her head and put a hand under Ali’s chin and lifted it up. “My opinion on this subject hasn’t changed, but I think it’s really good that we’re checking in with each other on it. Honestly. Who knows if one of us might decide we want to start doing a little anal play at some point in the future? We’ve got to keep talking about it. I’d hate for you to miss out on something you really wanted just because of a decision we made almost ten years ago.”

“Oh, I’m not changing my mind” Ali’s eyebrows both went up.

“That’s good Al” Ashlyn chuckled again. “I’m not either” she wrapped her arms around Ali’s waist and pulled their hips together. “But if you ever do change your mind you have to promise to tell me” she quirked an eyebrow at the brunette to make sure she knew how serious she was.

“Same goes for you” Ali met Ashlyn’s loving gaze and held it. “I mean it Ashlyn. Don’t you dare just ignore this because you know it’s not my favorite...”

“Sweetheart, I’m not, I promise you” the keeper grinned at her selfless wife. “I still can’t believe you did that last night. I know how much that grosses you out. I’m really proud of you.”

“You don’t gross me out” Ali corrected quickly and emphatically. “Nothing about you or on you grosses me out Ash, nothing” she brought their lips together in a deep, slow kiss trying to show her keeper just how much she meant it.

“I feel the same about you honey” Ashlyn replied after the kiss. “Exactly the same. But I don’t see the need to start doing something that neither of us loves when there are so many other things that we both do love” she kissed Ali’s forehead when she saw her smile in relief.

“That’s totally how I feel babe, thank God” she exhaled loudly and her shoulders slumped a little when she finally relaxed them. 

“Good, then we’re still in agreement. No thank you to anal sex. And we’ll revisit it if either of us ever wants to explore it” she winked as she emphasized the word ‘explore’ making them both laugh out loud. 

“And we should make sure to check-in with each other again...”

“I think another ten years would be good” the keeper finished her sentence for her and they both laughed as they hugged some more.

“God I love you” Ali whispered with her chin over her keeper’s shoulder.

“I love you too baby.”


	19. Kids' First Epiphany

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My heart is full from Ali's sweet birthday message to Ashlyn today. Sigh...

2025 began on a freezing cold Wednesday morning. There was barely any snow on the ground but it had been in the single digits for the past two days. The artists who did the ice sculptures at ‘First Night’, Boston’s New Year’s Eve celebration down near Boston Common and in different locations throughout the city, were certainly ecstatic. Nothing was worse than working so hard on an ice sculpture only to have it melt away in above-freezing temperatures on New Year’s Eve or the day before. But everybody else who had braved the cold weather to get out and participate in the ‘First Night’ festivities froze their asses off. It was the kind of cold where the police rounded up the homeless people just to try and keep them warm.

Ashlyn walked carefully through the big old house, trying not to wake up any of their houseguests as she looked for coffee and her wife. She had already looked in Dodge’s room for him, the earliest riser in the family, but his crib was empty. As she quietly made her way down the front stairs she peeked into the front living room and saw Jessie sprawled out and fast asleep on the ‘L’ shaped couch. Ashlyn moved to the other side of the front hall and looked into the front parlor where she saw Carm and Kacey out cold on the blow-up mattress. Liz was passed out on the couch in the family room to complete the guest list for the first floor. The Dwyers, all five of them, were upstairs in the studio on the pull-out couch. The kids were in sleeping bags and the baby was in the portable crib the Kriegers always kept on hand. The Crosses were all in Meg’s room across the hall, Niki in bed with Noah and Molly on the pull-out couch with Evan and Penny. Whitney took the twin bed in Josie’s room and Ryan took the one in Drew’s room and everyone had managed to get to sleep and stay asleep after ringing in the New Year six hours before.

“There you are” the blonde whispered as she kissed Ali’s forehead and tousled Dodge’s curly hair. “How long have you been up?”

“Oh, about forty-five minutes” Ali looked at the digital clock on the stove she could see from her seat at the small kitchen table. Dodge was snuggled into her lap and they were watching ‘Dora the Explorer’ on the iPad resting on the kitchen table, volume down low so as not to wake up anybody else. “Did you sleep ok?”

“Yeah, just not long enough” she answered and leaned down to kiss Ali’s lips. “You want more coffee?”

“Yes, please” the brunette replied quietly and watched her pajama-clad wife move to the Keurig. 

Ashlyn looked back at her wife with a questioning look as she stood in front of the coffee maker. Ali shrugged her shoulders and smiled, touched, as always, by how thoughtful and considerate her keeper was. Ashlyn was worried about the noise of the Keurig waking everybody up. They had managed to sleep through Ali using it almost an hour ago so it could be done. The truth was, it was almost 6:30 anyway and the kids would be getting up soon which meant nobody would be enjoying any more quiet time.

“I love this” Ali smiled at her wife after Ashlyn came back with two cups of coffee and moved the other kitchen table chair to sit next to the brunette.

“Coffee? Quiet time with the wild one” Ashlyn nodded at Dodge, engrossed in his show and oblivious to the both of them, “or me?”

“Yes” the brunette smiled and leaned her head over for a kiss.

“Me too baby.”

“Last night was a lot of fun. I think we need to make that an annual tradition. What do you think?”

“Yeah, definitely. It was a ton of fun. I wasn’t sure a kid-friendly New Year’s Eve party would deliver, but it sure did” Ashlyn chuckled softly as she played with the hair at the back of Ali’s neck.

“Told you” she replied with a smug but playful smirk.

“Yes you did dear” the blonde sighed and smiled. “I should have known better than to doubt you.”

“That’s all I’m saying” Ali giggled quietly as they kissed again, enjoying their sleepy, quiet time together in a house packed to the gills with their friends.

//

For the first year ever, Ali and Ashlyn decided to celebrate Epiphany with the kids. They wanted to wait until Drew had an understanding of Christmas, at least, before they started to confuse the issue with three more small gifts on January 6th. Ali was the one who pushed for it because she loved that it was a Grandma Lilian tradition that she planned to continue for at least two more generations if she could. The kids would be turning 6, 4 and 2 this year, 2025, and that was old enough. That Monday night, after dinner and before bathtime, they sat the kids down in the still-decorated family room and explained the story of baby Jesus’ birth and the three wise men and how it translated into Christmas. They didn’t spend too much time because they knew a lot of it was over their heads and they didn’t want the kids to get too confused. Vicki had given the kids a ‘Lil People’ Nativity set the year before and Ashlyn had immediately started to tell the story that way, using the friendly kids’ toys to act it out. So the story wasn’t completely foreign to them, by any means. This year they just added in three small gifts for each child, as well as themselves, and explained that they represented the gifts of the magi.

“So instead of gold, frankincense and myrrh...” Ali picked up after her wife had done the bulk of the story-telling to that point, “we got you three different things to celebrate the day the three wise men finally arrived to meet baby Jesus.”

“More presents?” Drew’s eyes lit up.

“Yes buddy” Ashlyn chuckled and ruffled the thick dark hair on top of his head. “Three little presents for each of you. Are you ready?”

“Lily, stop touching your brother” Ali said and quirked a sharp eyebrow with a cock of her head to show just how serious she was. “Just, both of you keep your hands to yourself, got it?” she addressed both of the twins who were sitting next to each other on the couch and not paying much attention. All four kids were sitting side by side on the couch, in the order of their birth. The seating wasn’t on purpose, but it was how they had naturally fallen into place. Ali sat on the coffee table in front of them, close to her youngest daughter. Lily was the queen of starting things and then crying her face off when Josie or Dodge finally reciprocated and things escalated. It had taken both moms a while to realize she was doing it, but they were on to her now. Not even five seconds had gone by before Lily reached over and poked Dodge’s thigh. “Lily!” Ali raised her voice. “I mean it. If you touch him again you won’t get your Epiphany gifts.”

The threat was real and all four kids knew that both of their moms usually followed through on them. Lily looked over at Ashlyn, who was sitting across from them on the other end of the coffee table, for confirmation. The keeper raised her eyebrows and nodded her head to assure her the threat was very real indeed. Dodge squished himself closer to Josie to try and put some distance between himself and his twin – he was smart enough to understand that there was a risk that his presents might be taken away too because of his involvement in the tussle. As disappointed as Ali and Ashlyn had been to know that Lily could be such a trouble-maker, and a sneaky one at that, they were also relieved to understand that Dodge wasn’t always the one who started things. They weren’t dumb though, they knew he was still usually the cause of the trouble, but it was nice to know it wasn’t automatically always him anymore. And he wasn’t a jerky kid. He was excited and active and he liked to be on the move and doing things. That all translated into not being very good at sitting still and having an uncontrollable need to engage with his siblings, usually by touch. For a while they thought he might have Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) but Dr. Comello told them it was too early to even think about that. She assured them that he was just a rambunctious toddler enjoying the new-found freedom that being more mobile brought him. Dr. Comello encouraged them to keep their eyes on the situation but suggested that as long as he was learning and developing that he was probably perfectly ok.

It was troubling for Ali moreso than Ashlyn because the brunette’s childhood experience hadn’t been like Dodge’s. She and Kyle had grown up and behaved more sedately, like Drew and Josie did, for the most part. None of them were angels, not Kyle, Ali, Drew or Josie, but none of them were quite as exuberant and intense as Dodge either. Ashlyn, on the other hand, recognized her brother and herself in their youngest boy and she knew that they just had to keep him active and occupied. Dodge just had more energy than his brother and sisters did. The keeper did her best to try and make Ali understand and feel better about it, but it had taken a phone call from Tammye, just after Thanksgiving, and several stories about Ashlyn and Chris as toddlers to really calm the brunette’s nerves. 

None of their kids were perfect, at all. Drew could be mean and stand-offish to his siblings. Josie had a temper and they all learned quickly not to piss her off if they could help it. Dodge was constantly in somebody’s face or space, trying to play and interact with them regardless of whether or not he was welcome. And Lily could be a moody, sneaky diva. But they were perfect for Ali and Ashlyn. Most of the time they were very good kids who played well together and with others. They were goofy and loved to laugh but they also loved to learn new things. They were typical, normal, growing kids.

“Ok, Drew, you help me get the presents and give them out” Ashlyn instructed and smiled as the boy eagerly hopped off the couch. “Do you see the letters on them?” she asked as they huddled beneath their tired, almost dried-out Christmas tree together. It was in its usual place, between the back of the couch and the nook area, blocking the door on the left side of the house.

“Yep” he nodded, looking at the wrapped presents with large ‘D’ ‘L’ ‘J’ and ‘A’ written on them in black magic marker.

“Ok, you go give those out, mommy will help you” she grinned as she loaded his arms up with all twelve of the gifts. She saw Ali smile and roll her eyes at her from her spot on the coffee table but Ashlyn knew he could do it. He only had to go about six feet or so from the tree, around the back of the couch to the coffee table and Ali. “You’re doing good buddy!” she called out encouragingly.

He only made it half way before he dropped half of them and stood stock still, terrified to move in case he dropped any more.

“That’s ok sweetie” Ali smiled at him. “Bring those over here” she patted the coffee table and slid out of the way so he had room to put the five gifts down, “then you can go back and get the rest.”

Ashlyn came over with the other six gifts, the ones she and her wife had gotten for each other, and knelt down at the edge of the couch by Lily. She watched Drew carefully look at each gift and determine the letter on the front. Then he practically threw each one at the corresponding sibling.

“Easy Drew” the keeper cautioned. “It’s not a race. Nobody’s opening anything until we’re all ready.”

“J!” Josie yelled out excitedly when she saw a gift with her initial on it.

“That’s right little one” Ali cooed as she handed the present to the red head and squeezed her little leg.

“Who’s ‘A’?” Drew asked, confused.

“That’s an A for Andrew” Ashlyn replied as she handed three gifts to her wife. “That’s you, remember?”

“I thought I was the ‘D’ for Drew?” he scrunched his face up.

“The ‘D’ is for Dodge” Ali clarified. “It’s confusing huh? You guys both have D names, Drew and Dodge. But your full name is Andrew and that starts with the ‘A’, remember?”

They had talked about this a lot at school that year. Everybody called him Drew but when his name got called or they did an exercise that had something to do with their initials the teachers used ‘A’ for Andrew. That was the school policy on nicknames and it was designed so that the child would learn both of his or her names. It was a safety thing, really. If Drew was ever lost and a police officer asked him his name he needed to be able to tell him his full name, Andrew Krieger. It made sense, but it was confusing for the little kids who were wondering why they had two names. The confusion would only last for a short time though, the kids were smart and could handle it. They just needed to practice. Which is exactly why Ashlyn had insisted they use ‘A’ for Drew’s epiphany presents. Ali had been willing to let it slide but the keeper didn’t want to undo the work his teachers had put in so far that year. It had surprised Ali that her wife had been so adamant about it until she took a few minutes to consider what might be filling the blonde’s head. They both remembered the awful accident that Ashlyn and Drew had been in 3-1/2 years ago and the idea that knowing his full name could help Drew in other scenarios like that one was all the reason they would ever need.

“Oh yeah” Drew grinned and buried his face into Ali’s lap, embarrassed. “I forgot.”

“That’s ok sweet boy” Ali bent over and kissed the back of his head while she rubbed his back. “It takes a while to get used to it. But you’ll get it.”

She wanted to spend a minute and tell him how proud she was of him for learning both names but the natives were getting restless. Dodge in particular was beside himself because he didn’t have any gifts yet. Drew had kept the D ones to last, thinking they were his own.

“Alright Dodger, calm down” Ashlyn chuckled and handed him one of his gifts. “Yours are right here big guy.”

Drew stood up and rushed to finish his big boy job of handing out the presents, giving Dodge his last two gifts before his mama could. Ashlyn winked at Ali and they both smiled adoringly at their sons. Dodge had the sweetest, most appreciative smile on his face as he watched his big brother pay attention to him and give him gifts at the same time. That moment was probably worth more than the presents themselves to little Dodge.

“Ok, go ahead and open them” Ali allowed the mayhem to begin, laughing as she watched all four kids tear apart the wrapping paper and toss it every which way possible. 

Josie had a look of sheer panic on her face when she got a piece of tape, with a big chunk of wrapping paper still attached, stuck on her thumb. It was as if she had lost all ability to use that entire hand until the offending tape was removed. Ali was closest so she yanked the tape away before any tears or temper tantrums could start. When the dust settled a mere two minutes later, each kid had opened their own silly string foam for bathtime in their favorite colors: red for Drew, purple for Josie, blue for Dodge and pink for Lily; and their own package of three miniature superhero collectibles that were all the rage at that time. It was such a waste of time and money – the stupid superheroes were only as big as Ashlyn’s thumb knuckle but all the kids were collecting them. They came in a plastic bag so you couldn’t tell which ones were inside either. Dodge looked like he had won the lottery when he yanked the tiny Captain America out of the package. It was his favorite superhero and he already had four of them but he was thrilled nonetheless. Ashlyn saw Lily’s chin starting to quiver and gave a quick glance to her wife to try and understand what was the matter. The brunette nodded twice towards Drew and Ashlyn craned her neck so she could see which superheroes he had opened. 

“Hey Drew did you get Supergirl?” the keeper asked quickly as Lily started to sniffle.

“Umm...yeah” he looked down absent-mindedly, all his focus was on his third gift.

“How would you feel about trading her to Lily for...” she looked down at Aquaman, Green Lantern and Black Panther, “Aquaman?”

“No thanks” he replied, not really giving it much thought. 

“Wee” Dodge said her name as best he could, “want dis one?” he asked and held out the Hulk in the palm of his pudgy little hand.

Ali thought she was going to cry at the tender gesture. It took several minutes of negotiating before a successful trade was completed. Lily didn’t want to give up any of her three and just expected someone to give her one of theirs for free. Ashlyn grinded her teeth a bit when she saw her daughter’s selfish behavior but one look at her wife calmed her down again. They both knew they would need to work with Lily on not being so selfish, but they also had to remind each other that she wasn’t even 2 years old yet. She had a lot to learn about a lot of things. Finally, Josie traded Antman to Drew for Supergirl and then traded Supergirl to Lily for Black Panther. Crisis averted.

The third gift was different for each kid and was really the only meaningful one they received that evening. Drew got and was mesmerized by a deck of trading cards for his favorite video game. Josie got a new disc for the Leapfrog music player she received from Santa for Christmas. It had come with two discs to start but this new disc had a lot of Josie’s favorite songs from ‘The Little Mermaid’ and ‘Beauty and the Beast’ on it. Dodge got a new matchbox car to go with the fourteen other ones he already had but he didn’t care because he loved them all. He loved this new one because there were flames painted along both sides of the shiny, metallic blue sports car. His moms had both been nervous about this collection at all because the cars were made of metal and were the perfect size for throwing and it just seemed like a bad idea. But, shockingly, Dodge hadn’t thrown a single one yet and he had received the first few from Uncle Chris at his first birthday back in May. Lily got a new outfit for the brand new doll she got from Santa. The doll, much like Josie’s music player, came with two outfits but there were literally fifty others you could buy separately. Ashlyn had selected a veterinarian’s outfit for the doll, complete with a tiny plastic dog. All four kids were ecstatic with their presents.

Ali unwrapped a new pair of simple earrings, a container of her expensive face moisturizer, and a murder mystery novel from a new author that Ashlyn hoped she would like.

“Thank you so much honey” Ali slid back over to the other side of the coffee table and gave her wife, still on her knees, a hug and a kiss. “I love them” she whispered against Ashlyn’s lips, eyes still closed. “And I love you.”

The keeper’s three gifts were a long, thin, black, metal necklace, a bottle of her favorite body spray, and a plastic keychain with a picture of all four kids in it from their trip to the Olympics that summer. Ali could think of six or seven different places her wife might hang the keychain and she knew it would make her smile every single time she looked at it.

“I love you too sugarplum” Ashlyn kissed her again and then pulled her into a long, tight embrace. “I’m so glad we did this. I think it was the perfect time.”

“Me too. You were right babe” Ali agreed and pressed a kiss into her keeper’s cheek. “Happy Epiphany.”

//

January was still Ashlyn’s month of rebirth and renewal. It always had been and she had never really been sure why. Most people, like Ali for example, experienced that feeling in September and were able to link it back to starting a new school year. They felt re-energized and refreshed and ready for a new year full of endless possibilities. Ashlyn felt all of those things, but in January when the actual new year began. February and March were still her least busy of the year, obligation and work-wise, although this year she was busier than ever trying to get the final details worked out for the Academy. She and Whitney and Cat Whitehill were working hard to get everything ready to go, so that when the construction was completed, hopefully by the end of May, they could move right ahead with getting the physical space set up and ready for the first campers to arrive on Sunday, June 22nd. 

Ashlyn’s new thing for January 2025 was to help coach Drew’s youth basketball team. She had played in middle school and high school, before her focus on soccer took up so much of her time, and she had been good but not great. She also hadn’t loved it so it was easy to let it go and commit more time and energy to soccer. She had felt the same way about softball, although she had enjoyed more success swinging the bat than she had shooting the rock. The keeper had been inspired by Ali coaching Drew’s soccer team that fall and wanted to be a part of shaping her young son’s first real basketball experience. She was happy to just be an assistant coach though. All she had to do was pay attention and make sure the kids’ shoelaces were tied and they were running in the correct direction. They were five years old. Nothing was very complicated yet. The most difficult thing they had to do was dribble the ball. It was pretty freaking adorable though, watching all the little boys try so hard to do a good job. They tried to be tough and not cry when they got their fingers jammed or when they caught a pass with their chin. They tried to do everything their coach asked them to do: keep your head up, watch where you’re going, pass the ball, pay attention, shoot the ball. Some of the kids were so small that they could barely throw the ball five feet forget about get it anywhere near the hoop.

Youth basketball started the second week of school in January, which was the third week of the month, and the games were every Saturday at 11:00am. It was a similar set-up to the soccer schedule. They practiced for a half hour and then played a game for the second half hour and there were a total of 8 games stretched out from mid-January to the end of March. They had the February vacation week off, and the long weekends of Martin Luther King Jr. Day and President’s Day off as well. Ethan was on Drew’s team and that made everybody happy. They were proud members of the Lakers and wore their purple t-shirts with great pride. The little league basketball teams all took names of actual NBA teams, just like the little league t-ball teams did. Somebody had to be the Lakers just like somebody had to be the Yankees during t-ball season in the Spring, but no self-respecting Boston sports fan was happy with either situation when it happened to their kid.

The first game was the same weekend as the NWSL draft, still on a Friday night, that year. Ashlyn flew out to Houston Thursday afternoon to do some promo shots and publicity for the league, relieved to still be in demand with a good portion of the fanbase. Ali encouraged her and made sure she had everything she needed for her night away, reminding her what a kick-ass job she always did at the draft. The brunette had begged her wife not to avoid talking about the Academy if the subject came up. Ali knew Ashlyn would never bring it up on her own, but she wanted to make sure she took advantage of the exposure if it did happen to come up in conversation. Whitney and Cat and even Tobin Heath had told the keeper the same thing. Whitney’s words were the harshest, and also the ones that kept echoing in Ashlyn’s head the whole time she was in Houston.

“Now is not the time for you to do your ‘I don’t want people to feel obligated’ thing Ash” the lawyer had spoken sternly when they met for a quick lunch before Ashlyn’s flight on Thursday. “I know that’s how you feel but we just can’t afford to have you do that this time. We’ve all worked way too fucking hard on this. We need you to talk about the Academy and get people excited about it. We’re all ready to pile on and add to what you put out there and retweet the hell out of it and all of that. But you’ve got to get it started. You’re the most popular out of all of us...”

“Ummm Mia fucking Hamm?” Ashlyn challenged with a little bit of bite in her voice.

“We all know who Mia is and what she means to our sport” Whitney replied carefully, hearing the tone in her best friend’s voice. “But the girls we’re looking for know you more than Mia. That’s just the truth and you’re going to have to deal with that Ash. I know you don’t like it and it makes you uncomfortable but this time that’s just too fucking bad.”

Ashlyn was taken aback for a minute by the straight truth her best friend was dropping on her. The keeper was about to tell Whitney where she could stick her version of the truth when she remembered that she was seven months pregnant. Whitney’s hormones were probably making her just as crazy as they had made everybody else. It was just such a different look for the normally stoic and good-natured lawyer. As soon as Ashlyn made the connection she smiled warmly across the lunch table.

“Alright Whit” she nodded slowly as the smile got bigger. “I’ll do it. You’re right. We’ve all worked too hard and if talking about the Academy on Friday night will help then I’ll do it.”

“You...you will?” the lawyer stammered, surprised her best friend hadn’t yelled back at her or stormed away.

“I’m not bringing it up” Ashlyn clarified with a sharp look of her own. “But if it comes up I’ll sell it hard. I promise.”

The two friends hugged it out as they left the restaurant and Ashlyn’s suspicions were confirmed when Whitney burst into tears while they did so.

“Hey, you’re alright Whit” Ashlyn soothed as she hugged her best friend in the vestibule. “You’ve got so many things on your mind these days and I don’t want you to worry about the Academy this weekend ok? I’ve got it. I promise I’ll do a good job promoting it Friday night. I swear.”

“I know you will” the lawyer sniffled and reached for a tissue from her purse, still hugging the keeper. “I’m sorry Ash...”

“Don’t apologize for anything. You’re doing a great job at all your jobs” she chuckled and pulled back to wipe some of the tears off of Whitney’s red face. “And you’re doing a great job being pregnant too, and that’s the hardest of all. I remember” she nodded and smiled when she saw her friend relax a tiny bit. “You’re due at the end of March and you’ve got the toughest part to get through coming up here. I won’t lie to you...”

“Dirty truth?” she asked, her voice small and quiet.

“Dirty truth” the keeper smiled again. “But you can do it Whit. The last two months go by sooooooo slowly but then, weirdly, fast at the same time. It’s going to drive you a little nuts so just be nice to yourself.”

“Ryan’s taking me away this weekend, just up to Mount Washington...”

“That’s right! I totally forgot” Ashlyn interrupted excitedly. “Well that’s fucking perfect. Do a lot of that between now and the end of March. I mean it” she put her hands on both of Whitney’s shoulders and held her friend an arm’s length away. “Do not be a hero. Do not do extra work, on anything. Just be nice to yourself and put yourself first for a change. Can you do that for me Engen?”

“Yeah” she smiled shyly and chuckled. “I know all of this Ash but...thank you for reminding me. I really needed to hear it.”

“Well that’s what best friends are for, silly” Ashlyn pulled her in for another tight hug as the valet brought the lawyer’s car to the curb. “Here my lady, your chariot awaits” she teased as she led Whitney outside and helped her into her car. “Have a great weekend and please just relax and don’t think about anything else except you and Ryan and your little baby girl, ok?”

“Ok. Love you Ash.”

“Love you too bestie.”

//

Thursday night at the big old house had been an adventure for Ali with all four kids by herself. The first night wasn’t usually so troublesome, but Lily got herself into a snit almost the minute they got home from daycare and had been difficult the rest of the evening. The brunette knew she just had to get through Thursday night because she had Vicki coming over to help her Friday night. It was always encouraging to know when the cavalry was coming. They hadn’t seen Sam or Ethan except in passing the first three days that week. Ethan had been sick last week, the first week after the holiday break, and Sam and his parents had kept him home all week while they nursed him back to health. Ali was still a little nervous to talk to Sam about the kiss at the holiday concert. She didn’t really want to talk to him at all about it and was very much hoping she wouldn’t have to. She had successfully pushed it out of her mind. It had been almost a full month since it had happened and they had last seen each other that it almost felt silly to go back and revisit the incident. She remembered her conversation with Sydney and decided to stick to her plan. If Sam brought it up then she would address it. If he didn’t, then she would let it go and assume that he had been overcome by some sort of weird grief reaction and never speak of it ever again. The kiss had obviously not meant anything to either one of them. She would just pretend that it never happened and only Sydney would ever know about it. She and Sam would go back to the easy friendship they had always had.

Before she left town on Thursday, Ashlyn texted Sam and asked him if he would mind picking Drew up after school and taking him home with him until Ali got home with all three little kids from daycare. She briefly explained that she was away until Saturday morning for the NWSL draft and was trying to make it a little easier on Ali while she was away. Sam texted right back and said he’d be happy to help. He even offered to drive Drew to the big old house in time for dinner Thursday night if that would help. Ashlyn accepted his kind offer and that was that. She told Ali she had already made the arrangements and that Sam was going to do that both Thursday and Friday. The brunette was relieved because that was one less thing she would have to do with three fussy kids in the van both afternoons.

Ali didn’t hear the knock on the mudroom door Thursday afternoon because Lily was wailing away on her lap in the family room, with Persey sitting right by their side like a soft, comforting statue. The brunette had gone upstairs to change out of her work clothes, leaving the three little kids in the front living room with their snacks and sippy cups watching one of their shows. She hadn’t been gone for ten minutes when she heard the crying. It wasn’t the terrifying cry of a child who was in severe pain, thank God. But it wasn’t the usual whiny, bratty cry either. It had been hard to gauge how quickly she needed to get back down there. When she heard the second, different cry from another child she stopped what she was doing and ran down the front stairs to restore order.

“Hi, I...umm...I hope it’s ok” she heard Sam’s voice before she saw him entering the family room from the kitchen and walking up next to where she was sitting on the couch with Lily and Persey. “I rang the bell but...”

“Oh, Sam” she said, surprised and embarrassed that he had come into such a spectacle. “I’m sorry I didn’t hear the doorbell...” her voice was loud so he could hear her over Lily’s crying. “Shhhhh...baby you’re ok now” she kissed her daughter’s dirty blonde head again and kept rubbing her back to try and get her to calm down.

“Mommy!” Drew yelled and ran to give her a hug, making both grown-ups smile for a minute.

Ali reached out with her left arm and hugged her son hello. As soon as she felt his chilly hands on her bare sides she remembered, in horror, that she didn’t have a shirt on. She had taken her suit jacket and blouse off and was just about to unzip her skirt when she had run downstairs, the top of her covered in only her white, lace bra. She hadn’t had a chance to do anything about it because she was just starting to get Lily to stop crying.

“Hi sweet boy” she kissed the top of his head and tried to hold him to her as long as possible because he was covering her up.

She could feel herself blushing and she just tried to keep her voice steady as she looked quickly at Sam.

“Thanks so much. I really appreciate you bringing him home” she said as nicely and quickly as she could, wanting nothing more than for him to get out of her house right that second.

“Oh no problem. I’ll bring him home tomorrow too, no trouble at all.” He smiled and seemed oblivious to what was happening. He wasn’t staring at her but he wasn’t turning away either. “Everything ok?” he asked and looked back towards the timeout chair on the other side of the double-sided fireplace. 

Josie was sitting there, tear streaks covering her red face and her arms folded angrily across her chest. Drew was starting to squirm, wanting out of the hug and excited to hear that he would get to go to Ethan’s house again tomorrow after school. Lily was still crying but it had started to soften just a bit. Ali looked around the area and, for fucking once, there was no pile of clean laundry on the nook table behind her waiting to be folded.

“Yes, we’re ok” Ali smiled as she let her son out of the hug. She quickly switched Lily from her right side to her left side to help cover her exposed skin. “Minor skirmish but we’re good now. Thanks again Sam.”

There was one more awkward moment where it seemed like he was going to say something but then didn’t.

“Ok, well Ethan’s waiting in the car so I’d better go” he motioned over his shoulder towards the mudroom and smiled kindly.

“Oh, yes, poor guy. Don’t let us keep you” she chuckled. “Thank you again. See you tomorrow!”

Lily finally stopped crying when Drew paid her some attention and picked up her sippy cup and handed it to her. Ali heard the mudroom door close and then a car engine start and exhaled loudly, letting her head rest against the back of the couch.

“Mommy, where is your shirt?” Drew asked, just now noticing that she wasn’t wearing one.

“Oh I didn’t get a chance to finish changing before your sisters decided to be mean to each other” she explained matter of factly, with just a hint of exasperation in her voice. “Will you go see what Dodge is doing, please?” she asked with a smile and ruffled his hair. “It’s way too quiet in there” she motioned towards the front living room. “Just look in and then come back and tell me what he’s doing. Thank you for your help big boy.”

Lily seemed to be fine now and the brunette honestly didn’t know if Josie had really hurt her or not. She hadn’t been there to see what had happened so she could only deal with what the kids could tell her. And that was always a dicey situation to be in. If Ali had to guess, something definitely happened because Josie didn’t deny hitting her sister. But what had Lily done to deserve it?

“Alright Lily girl” Ali kissed her daughter’s head as she set her on the couch and stood up. “You wait right here for me for a minute and then we’ll go upstairs and you can help me get changed.”

“He’s watching a show” Drew announced when he came back to the family room couch, hugging his mother’s legs as she stood there.

“He’s just watching a show? Not doing anything else?” she frowned, knowing that was too good to be true.

“Yep. Just watching a show” Drew nodded. “I’m thirsty.”

“Ok, just give me a minute and I’ll bring you some juice. But we’re going to have dinner soon so don’t eat anything and ruin your appetite. Got it?” she asked as she watched him climb up onto the couch next to Lily. “Can we watch a show in here?”

Ali wasn’t going to argue about much at that moment. She turned on the tv and found a show they both wanted to watch, which was easy because Drew and Lily were always nicer around each other than any of the other siblings. She walked to the fridge to grab Drew’s apple juice in his Ironman thermos cup and peeked into the front living room while she was at it. There was Dodge, watching a show, completely naked. She sighed as she saw his cute little body sitting in the middle of the floor, next to Fred, without even his diaper on anymore. He had just figured out how to take his clothes off and it was becoming a problem. A cute problem, but a problem nonetheless. First things first, she had to get Josie out of the timeout that she wasn’t even sure she really deserved to be in. Hopefully Dodge wouldn’t pee or poop in the next five minutes. She said a silent prayer and hurried over to her oldest daughter in the timeout chair.

And that’s how the whole rest of the evening went. It was another half hour before Ali finally made it upstairs to get changed, bringing Josie with her instead of Lily because the younger girl was perfectly happy watching Paw Patrol with Drew and she wasn’t going to mess that up for anything. She missed two calls from Ashlyn during a protracted bathtime where she had to get Dodge and Josie out of the tub and refill it because Dodge had peed in it as soon as they had sat down. They did baths two at a time now and it didn’t matter to them who shared with whom. Ashlyn would take two in one bathtub and Ali would take the other two in the other bathroom across the hall. That night Drew and Lily were getting along like gangbusters so Ali decided to just keep it that way. On nights like that you just had to take any little advantage where you could find it.

“Holy shit, that’s the worst” Ashlyn laughed into the phone when they finally got to talk later that night. Ali had just given her a complete blow by blow, at the blonde’s request, from the minute they got home to the minute she went in to soothe a fussy Dodge fifteen minutes ago. “I’m so sorry honey.” It was easy to hear the sincerity in her voice, even behind the chuckle. “My poor baby.”

“The worst part of all was that when Sam brought Drew home he came in to make sure I knew Drew was in the house...”

“Because Lily was crying so loudly you couldn’t hear the doorbell” Ashlyn interjected with another laugh. 

“Right” she continued with a heavy sigh, describing the whole scene to her wife. “And that’s when I realized I didn’t even have a fucking shirt on!” she yelled in frustration. “I mean, really?! What are the fucking chances?”

Ashlyn was quiet for a minute and Ali was just about to ask her if she was still there when she heard her keeper burst into laughter, unable to hold it in any longer.

“It’s not funny Ash” she whined and then pouted, even though the blonde couldn’t see her. 

Ashlyn continued laughing, even though she was trying hard to get control of herself. After another minute, Ali finally started laughing too, both of them clutching their stomachs and gasping for air.

“That is the funniest story I think I’ve ever heard” the keeper laughed again as she wiped the tears from her face and tried to calm herself down. “Oh my God. I would have paid a ton of money to see your face when you realized you were topless.”

“I wasn’t topless, I had a bra on” Ali clarified with a loud chuckle. “And I used two of our children for as much cover as possible” she laughed again. “Holy shit” she exhaled as they both tried to get their breathing back to normal again. All they could hear from each other for another minute or two was breathing and the occasional giggle.

“So, which bra was it?” Ashlyn finally asked in her most seductive voice.

“Are you really trying to dirty talk me about how one of our friends saw me topless tonight?” Ali giggled.

“Oh so you were topless hmm?” she teased. “Get your story straight Krieger...” she chuckled. 

“There’s nothing straight about my story, All-star” she sassed right back. “You know that better than anyone.”


	20. Oh No He Didn't!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told you I'd tell you when the bloodshed scene with my nieces and nephews that happened to me in real life became part of the story. This is it. My gf at the time was with me so there were two grown-ups. I have never experienced a bloodier thing in my life. Scared the living shit out of me.

Friday was a busy day for both Ashlyn and Ali. The NWSL draft went well, as it always seemed to for the keeper. She got nervous about it every year but she always pulled it off. She looked calm and confident and she had the rare combined ability to talk soccer facts, in general and about most of the draft picks, while at the same time being charming and funny and entertaining as the co-host as well. Jane Campbell, one of the goalkeepers for the USWNT and the starting keeper for the Houston Dash was the other host and they had a lot of fun together. Of course they played up the fact that they were both keepers and that keepers were the best athletes of all soccer players and made endless jokes about the field players. There were all sorts of objections and playful complaints from other players who were hosting their respective NWSL team’s draft night. For the last several years, each NWSL team had a live feed of their facility where they hosted some season ticket holders and VIPs and winners of fan contests for the night. It was all in good fun and the league had seen a steady increase in interest for the NWSL draft each year. 2025 was no exception. It was the most-watched live draft ever in the 13-year history of the NWSL. This would be the fourth season that Ashlyn hadn’t played in and, somehow, she was still relevant and popular. Fans recognized her from her broadcast career and her profile had risen from her Nike work and her work with the Mental Health Initiative and her position with Knight-Harris. Having Lady Gaga sing your praises never hurt anybody’s popularity, that’s for sure.

Ashlyn had worked through her NWSL withdrawal last year, late though it had been when it finally hit her. She had relied heavily on Kristie Mewis and Rose Lavelle to help her get through the tough days where she was like an addict jonesing for a hit of the good stuff. Because she still worked for the Breakers she could go visit the stadium any time she wanted to and she did, often. Sometimes it helped and sometimes it made it harder to deal with missing the sport that had been such a big part of her life since she was a little girl. She warned Kristie, who retired at the end of the 2024 season, of what was coming but was careful not to ruin the midfielder’s final year on the pitch.

This year at the draft, Ashlyn felt clean and new. She wasn’t haunted by the ghosts of painful losses in big games. She wasn’t longing for time in the locker room with teammates or in autograph alley with the fans. She only occasionally felt the sting of regret, and, honestly, some anger, when she thought about her missed opportunity with the senior national team. But she knew that was always going to be with her. Ashlyn would wish her story with the USWNT had been different until the day she died. But, when she was having a good day and felt those feelings bubble up it was easy to remember that if she had gotten a chance to play for her country she might not have ended up in Boston at all. And that was a thought that made everything else pale in comparison. For the first time in four seasons she was at peace without soccer in her daily life. That wasn’t a fake peace that her body and mind fooled her into believing just because her life was too busy or stressful or hectic that she was ok without soccer in it. This was the real, true peace that she had worked for with Kristie, Rose and her therapist – Mattie. It felt fucking awesome.

//

Ali’s Friday went a lot like her Thursday had gone, except this time when she brought the little kids home from daycare she was able to get her clothes changed before the shit hit the fan. She had been more relaxed about Friday night because she knew she had help coming from Vicki. She was also looking forward to watching her smoking hot wife on Lifetime TV for several hours as she hosted the NWSL draft from Houston. The first glitch in the plan was that Vicki came down with some sort of stomach bug and called Ali to tell her she couldn’t help out that night. It was already 2:30pm and Ali was just leaving her office to go get the kids from daycare. She made a few calls to friends to see if there was a spare body anywhere that wanted to help wrangle four adorable kids with her that night. But she had no luck. Whitney was away with Ryan. Deb and Mike Christopher were down in Miami for the next two months. James was sick so Sydney didn’t feel right leaving Dom alone with baby Maddox and sick James. The brunette gave up and just decided she would take care of her own children as she had done dozens of times before. It was doable, it just wasn’t always easy. But she loved her children and really did love her time with them. She was still learning how to let most other things go while she spent time alone with them. She was trying to learn, for example, that the dishes could pile up for one night, or the kids could go to bed one night without baths, or the laundry could wait until the next day – depending on what was in it and what each kid needed for the next day. It was a process for the brunette and she was getting better at it. 

“Hel-loo” Sam called out from the mudroom door at 4:30pm as Drew scampered past him and into the kitchen.

Drew stopped short when he saw all the blood on his sister’s face as she sat on the counter next to the kitchen sink. Lily was screaming and tears were streaming down her cheeks as Ali worked on her bleeding mouth. Dodge and Persey were standing near the backstairs, watching intently, worried looks on both of their faces.

“Holy...” Sam breathed out when he turned into the kitchen and took in the scene. He hurried to Ali’s side. “What can I do?”

The brunette was relieved to hear his steady voice, and see his strong hands right there in the sink next to hers. It was nice to have another grown-up, any grown-up, around. She didn’t know where Josie was and, although she was glad to know where Dodge was so she didn’t have to worry about what trouble he was getting into, she really didn’t think he should be watching her try to get the bleeding in Lily’s mouth to stop. It was pretty traumatic, between all the blood and the screaming. Before she could even say anything she heard Julie Donaldson’s voice behind her, just entering the kitchen.

“Everything ok in here?” she asked cautiously as she tried to see around Ali and Sam. “I found this one in the driveway and I told him to come on inside.”

Ali and Sam both looked over their shoulders to see Ethan standing in front of the nurse, pale-faced.

“Julie, thank God” Ali said in a surprisingly strong voice. “Sam, can you take all the kids into the other room and...keep them there?”

“Sure thing. I’m on it” he said as he dried his hands off and picked up Dodge and then ushered both Drew and Ethan towards the front living room. Persey stayed put, watching carefully.

“I think Josie’s in there already, but please let me know if she’s not” Ali called over her shoulder as Julie approached the sink and the screaming child.

“What happened?”

“Josie hit her in the mouth with the bottom of her sippy cup. She just reached over and banged it right down onto her top lip” Ali explained, sticking to the facts and happy that she knew exactly what had happened. “She was sitting right on my lap and Lily was right next to me on the couch. I still can’t believe she did that” she finished and swallowed hard. “It took me a while to see where the cut is, there was so much blood, but I think it’s just right under her top lip, right in the middle.”

“Josie’s in here with us. We’re all set” Sam called out from the mudroom.

“Thanks Sam!” the brunette gave him a grateful look as she quickly glanced over her shoulder. “Oh, baby girl, you’re ok honey” she cooed into the side of Lily’s head after stepping to the side to give Julie room to look inside her little, screaming mouth. “Shhhhhhh...oh, sweetheart you’re ok” she rubbed her back and kissed her small hand which was clenched in a fist. “I know it hurts honey and it looked scary with the blood, but I promise you’re ok.”

After a couple of minutes the nurse smiled at the little girl and tenderly cupped her cheek. Lily had stopped screaming and was just whimpering and crying now. She took big, shuddering breaths and leaned her head against Ali’s chest as her tears finally started to slow.

“I’m pretty sure it’s not how you planned it, but Josie performed a frenectomy on Lily” she chuckled and patted Ali’s shoulder with her other hand. “It’s the upper labial frenulum and it’s the most common mouth injury in children, besides probably a fat lip” she explained. “It’s scary as hell if you’re not expecting it because it bleeds like crazy.”

“That’s the understatement of the year” Ali’s eyes went wide. “Is it just a cut?”

“Basically, yes. That little piece of skin that connects your upper lip to your upper gum is your frenulum and Lily’s has been torn and it’s perfectly normal and there’s nothing to be done about it, so just relax” she squeezed Ali’s forearm and smiled reassuringly. “Sometimes kids have to have theirs removed or cut because it’s impacting the way their teeth are coming in. Sometimes a baby has to have theirs cut so they can breastfeed correctly. Most of the time, nothing at all has to be done. It can happen to the upper or lower lip, by the way. But it’s a useless piece of skin that she might have needed to have removed at some point anyway. So, like I said, Josie might have just saved you a bunch of money” she chuckled.

“Ugh, or taken a year off of my life from the stress we all just went through” Ali rolled her eyes and sighed heavily. “Man I could use a drink” she chuckled and closed her eyes for a couple of seconds.

“Well you should have one” Julie smiled again. “You did a great job. You got it cleaned up better than anybody I’ve ever seen. Most parents get freaked out by all the blood and give up. Then they spend hours in the ER just to be told there’s nothing to be done and sent home.” She paused and waited for the brunette to look at her again. “Seriously, you did good. Just try and make sure she leaves it alone so it can heal. If she plays with it it’ll start to bleed again...”

“Oh God” Ali sucked in a breath. “Any advice?”

“Have a glass of wine” Julie giggled. “Just ice it if her lips swells, that’s from the impact though, not the cut. Otherwise just leave it alone.”

They both took a few minutes and talked to Lily about her boo-boo and finished getting her cleaned up. When Ali trotted down the backstairs with clean clothes to change her into, she realized it was dinner time and she hadn’t even said hello to Drew when Sam brought him home.

“How did you know to come over?” she asked her neighbor as they carefully pulled a clean shirt over Lily’s head.

“The lungs on this one” Julie made an eek face that the little girl couldn’t see, and then smiled. “My house is so quiet this evening that I feel like I could hear a pin drop anywhere in the whole neighborhood” she laughed.

“Ooooh, a night on your own?” Ali’s eyebrows went up. “How fun is that?”

“Wait a few more years” she smiled a little sadly, “it sounds good to you now, but you’ll find out it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.”

“Well if you want to hang out with us tonight you’re more than welcome” Ali laughed, not thinking anyone in their right might would consider it. “It’s dinnertime and I’ve just decided right this second that we’re ordering pizza...”

“Sticks” Lily piped up for the first time since she had stopped crying.

“Oh, and some mozzarella sticks too, apparently” Ali added as she scooped up her daughter and hugged her to her chest for a minute. “And then there’s the wine...”

“You know what?” Julie’s face broke into a big smile. “That sounds terrific. Are you sure you don’t mind?”

“Oh my God, Julie, please...you’re always welcome here, you know that.”

“But what about Sam?”

“Oh geez, I almost forgot” Ali ducked her head sheepishly and lowered her voice. “Well, I’m pretty sure I at least owe he and Ethan some pizza for keeping everybody calm in there” she nodded towards the front living room. “You guys know each other right? Ash told me you guys went to high school together, I think” Ali spoke as they walked through the kitchen and mudroom and finally into the front living room.

“Yep. We sure did.”

It was several hours later and the kids were all in bed, Ethan fast asleep in the twin bed in Drew’s room. Julie, Sam and Ali were sitting around the nook table finishing their third bottle of wine. Julie had opened the first bottle as soon as Ali picked up the phone to order dinner for everybody. It was now almost 11pm and they were all at least a little drunk. Sam and Julie had started telling Ali stories about high school and what it had been like to grow up in Gloucester as a ‘Fisherman’. It had been a surprisingly fun 2-1/2 hours that they had all really enjoyed. They talked and laughed and drank wine and ate almost every cookie Ali could find in the pantry. The tv in the family room was still tuned to Lifetime TV and Ashlyn’s attractive figure graced the screen across the room.

“Alright, well, I’m going to bed now” Julie announced as she stood up, wobbling more than a little bit. They all laughed and then Sam got up and walked her to the mudroom. “You shouldn’t drive” she slurred out with a drowsy wave of her finger. “Don’t be stupid now Sam. You sleep on the couch. Either hers or mine...”

Ali had caught up with them by now, a little less than steady on her feet too.

“I’ll be just fine Jules” he used the nickname from high school. 

“No, she’s right” Ali said much too loudly, unable to get the volume right because of all the alcohol in her system. She giggled and then tried again. “You should just crash on the couch...”

“Which one of us wants to start a nice, juicy rumor for everybody at school to talk about on Monday?” Julie asked and laughed as she reached out to hug Ali goodnight. “You should do it Al. Everybody knows you’re gay so it’s safer for him to stay here tonight.”

Ali thought her neighbor was kidding but it was clear from the look on her face that Julie was legitimately worried about having another man spend the night on her couch when her husband was away working for the weekend.

“Sure, it’ll be more fun this way” Ali giggled and leaned against the mudroom door that Sam had opened. “It’ll be our little secret” she tried, and failed, to whisper as she held her finger to her lips as if she was shushing someone. “The other moms will all be so jealous...”

“You girls are cute but crazy” Sam chuckled. He wasn’t quite as drunk as they were even though he’d had more wine than either of them. But he was definitely drunk. “I’m gonna walk Jules home and then come back for Ethan...”

“No you are not Sam Machado” Julie straightened herself up and glared at him, holding his keys in her hand and then stuffing them into her pants pocket protectively. “I can’t believe you’d be so stupid” she shook her head at him and smacked his arm as she turned and stumbled out into the driveway. “Now walk me home. It’s dark and I’m fucking drunk.”

Ali laughed her short, loud shout of a laugh and pushed him out the door behind her.

“You’d better get her home. I’ll make up the couch for you. Night Jules” she called after them with a giggle and closed the mudroom door.

By the time he came back, the brunette was leaning over the couch and tucking a sheet around the couch cushions in the family room for him. She had a bottle of water for him on the coffee table, an extra bed pillow and a blanket.

“You didn’t have to go to all this trouble” he said softly as he stood next to the couch. 

“Oh, it’s no trouble” Ali replied, turning her head to look at him as she finished tucking the sheet in. The sudden turn of her head made her dizzy and she felt like she might throw up from all the alcohol in her stomach. “Ughhh...” she groaned and leaned heavily against the back of the couch for a minute.

“Whoa, are you ok?” Sam asked as he grabbed her arm to help steady her and then lower her so she was sitting on the couch. “Just sit still for a minute” he suggested as he sat next to her and handed her the bottle of water after opening it. “Drink some water.”

“I’m ok” she smiled shyly at him. “I just got dizzy for a second” she swallowed. “I shouldn’t have turned my head like that.”

“Are you sure you’re ok?” he asked again, brushing the soft, brunette hair over her shoulder and letting his warm hand remain there, gently squeezing the back of her neck.

“Yeah, I’m good” she answered and closed her eyes. The neck rub felt really nice and she let herself enjoy it for a minute. With her eyes closed her mind drifted back to how fun their night had been. Just three friends talking about life and kids and then the Gloucester Fishermen high school stories. She couldn’t get over the fact that she had been lucky enough to find two nice people, seemingly at random. Ali really liked both Julie and Sam and knew how lucky she was to have them in her life. In her family’s lives. The way Sam had just stepped in so quickly and easily that evening to help her with the kids while they worked on Lily. He had been great tonight, just like he always was. And he was being so sweet to her right now when all he probably wanted to do was go to sleep. She was brought out of her thoughts when she heard herself moan. What the fuck was that? She took a quick second to think. Oh, right, he was rubbing her neck and it felt good. That’s all it was. But her eyes flew open and she wanted to die of embarrassment, again, when she realized that the moan had been out loud. “You won’t get much sleep with me sitting here in the middle of your bed” she giggled self-consciously and met his eyes.

“Maybe I like sitting here with you like this” he smiled sincerely at her. 

“You’re so sweet Sam. I can’t thank you enough for your help with the kids tonight” she shook her head, her words slurring as they left her lips. “You have perfect timing and I owe you big time.”

“Well you already bought me dinner and got me drunk so I think we’re all squared up” he chuckled and turned his body so he was facing her a bit more. “Besides, you’ve already helped me so much...so many times...”

His voice trailed off and they were both quiet for a minute. Somewhere deep in the back of Ali’s mind, an alarm bell started ringing. She couldn’t quite hear it though, muffled by all the wine she had swallowed that night. What she felt though, was a growing sense of unease. Something about this little chat felt different and she couldn’t quite put her finger on what it was. She was really trying to focus now but between the wine and the nice neck rub she was getting really sleepy and it was getting hard to keep her eyes open, forget about concentrate.

“The last time I saw you sitting on this couch you looked so beautiful Ali” Sam complimented her, referencing the day before when he had seen the brunette in just her bra. “You always look beautiful though...” he moved his other hand to her thigh and gave it a gentle squeeze as he moved his upper body closer.

Ali’s eyes were closed and she felt the soft squeeze on her leg and immediately thought of her gorgeous wife who had looked so good on tv that night. She smiled at the thought and wondered what that annoying ringing was in her head. That was the exact moment that she felt lips on hers, moving carefully but purposefully. It was a nice, warm sensation but her lips didn’t tingle like they usually did. She didn’t get the butterflies in her stomach like she normally did. Ali felt the tongue asking for permission and she opened her mouth just as she always did when Ashlyn kissed her like that. Ashlyn, she thought again of her wife and how beautiful she looked on tv...and now here she was kissing her. But, how could she be kissing her if she had just been on the tv? What was going on? The brunette felt a hand on her hip and tried hard to understand what was happening. The hand moved up her side as the kiss continued but started to feel different and strange. Both the hand and the lips felt foreign and wrong and Ali pulled back instinctively as her mind spun. That wasn’t Ashlyn’s hand and those weren’t Ashlyn’s lips...who the fuck was she kissing? 

“Nooo” she mumbled out as she pulled back and closed her mouth, scrunching her face up in disgust at the same time. “Sam!” she exclaimed, genuinely surprised to find the handsome face only an inch away from hers when she finally managed to get her eyes open. His eyes were closed and his whole face looked different. It was peaceful and serene and somehow innocent looking. “No, Sam” she repeated, louder this time, and pushed him away with both hands.

The whole thing had only lasted for a minute, but it had felt like an hour in Ali’s confused, alcohol-filled brain. Sam sat back on the couch with his own look of confusion and frustration. His brow furrowed for a few seconds and then he tried to kiss her again.

“Sam!” she yelped, even more surprised at his new attempt. She slid farther away from him, towards the wall, and tried to breathe. “I don’t know what you think you’re doing” she began weakly, really feeling like she was going to vomit. “But this is not happening” she stood up carefully, trying not to get dizzy again.

“Ali, I thought you wanted this too...” he managed to get out in an anguished voice. “I thought...”

She couldn’t wait to hear the rest of whatever he had to say because she had to run to the first-floor bathroom to throw-up. She closed the door behind her, tripped over the potty and practically fell into the toilet just as the contents of her stomach came up. So much red wine taunted her as it swirled around the toilet bowl after each flush. Her head was spinning and she threw-up four times before her stomach was finally empty. She reached up to the sink, turned on the water and managed to get some into her hand and then into her mouth. She did this a few times and then dry heaved twice more. She sat on the cool, tile floor with her back against the wall and her elbow resting on the potty. She willed herself to calm down and breathe. She was relieved Marisol had just cleaned the bathroom yesterday morning and that she was probably only sitting in two days’ worth of bad aim from her boys.

The next thing she knew, she was cold and stiff and thirsty. She dragged herself up to the sink and drank from the tap, her head pounding as she tilted it to the side. She stood up straighter and looked at herself in the mirror as she went back over the last few things she could remember. Holy fucking shit! Her heart was racing and she was furious. She just wasn’t sure who she was more furious with, herself or Sam. She splashed some cold water on her face and then opened the door, planning to go and set the record straight with the friend who apparently wanted benefits too. The house was just as she had left it an hour earlier, she could see from the digital clock on the cable box by the tv as she walked past it towards the family room couch. Sam was still slumped in the same position he had been in earlier too, fast asleep leaning against the back of the couch with his back up against the arm. Ali’s first impulse was to cover him with the blanket but then she changed her mind and went to grab two bottles of water from the pantry on her way up the backstairs. She didn’t feel like being nice to him. Now was not the time to have this conversation – both of them drunk and half-asleep, but this fucking conversation was most definitely going to be had in the morning. 

It was 12:45am and her head was killing her. She still felt dizzy and a little drunk. Maybe her nausea was from what she had done instead of all the wine she drank that night. She changed her clothes and crawled into bed, checking her phone before putting it on silent. She had missed a call from Ashlyn and had several texts from her keeper, the last one only fifteen minutes ago. Houston was an hour behind them so it was only 11:45pm there and Ashlyn had probably just finished up the draft. The two most recent texts were: 

Ashlyn: Hey baby, missed you on the phone. Hope tonight went better than last night. Xxoo I miss you.

And then 30 minutes later:

Ashlyn: Ok, well I’m going to sleep now. You probably fell asleep watching my pretty face on the tv didn’t you? ;) Can’t wait to be home. I love you.

Ali: Hi babe! I’m so sorry I missed you. It was a wild night here but everybody’s ok. Julie and Sam and Ethan joined us for dinner and then we drank wine. Not Ethan. Lol. I miss you too. And you killed it tonight Ash. You were awesome and you looked gorgeous. I can’t wait to see you in the morning. And don’t worry, I didn’t tell Drew you would be at his game, just in case something happens with your flight. He’s gonna be so psyched when you show up though. Call me when you wake up. I love you. Xxooxxoo

// 

The conversation with Sam didn’t happen in the morning because when Ali woke up to Dodge’s banging on his crib at 6am, Sam and Ethan were already gone. Ali spent a half hour snuggling in the front living room with Dodge and the dogs and then ran upstairs to take a shower before the other kids woke up and it became impossible to get twenty minutes alone. Her brain was swimming with questions and pounding like a blacksmith on an anvil as she showered and dressed. Ashlyn hadn’t called her either. Her flight was due to land in Boston at 9:50am which meant it took off from Houston at about 5:00am Houston time. She checked her texts.

Ashlyn: Didn’t want to wake you up. I’m sure you’ll have a hangover too. Lol. Hope it’s not too bad. Flight’s on time so far so keep your fingers crossed. See you soon. Love you. Xxoo

Ali: Hope your flight is good. Can’t wait to see you. Hangover’s not too bad, just a splitting headache. Took care of the stomach part last night. Blech. :o Serves me right. Lol

Ali: love you babe. <3

The brunette let the kids wake up in their own time and by 7:30am they were all laying on the couch watching cartoons and enjoying their juice from their sippy cups. Lily cried at first because her apple juice stung the cut inside her lip. Ali gave her a second sippy cup with just water in it so she could rinse her mouth when she needed to. She took a minute to text Sam before getting breakfast ready.

Ali: Why did you leave? Drew was bummed when he woke up and Ethan was gone. How did you even get home? Julie had your keys?

She didn’t get a reply for almost an hour.

Sam: Julie has your keys. Lol. Or I don’t know who’s they are, but they weren’t mine. ;)

Ali: Ok...we need to talk. 

Sam: See you at the game.

//

The little gym at the high school was exactly as named. It was small. There were no bleachers or risers or anything. Along the left wall of the gym, as you walked in, were folding chairs for the two teams to sit with the scorer’s table in between them. On the right side were more folding chairs for parents and other spectators to sit in. But it was just deep enough for one row. If enough parents or family members came to watch a game, many of them would stand in clusters at the two ends of the right side of the court. There were two doors into the court and they were at either end of the right side, exactly where the clusters of standers formed. It was a dumb design and layout but what could anybody do about it now? The big gym was newer and more modern and had full risers that rolled away when they weren’t needed. So nobody really cared about the little gym, except for the little league people.

It was 10:55am and Ashlyn jogged into the hallway, eyes searching for her family. Like a moth to a flame, she spotted her wife right away, standing with her back to the keeper in the corner of the hallway, a little bit past the second door into the gym. Most people used the first doorway because, well, you came to it first. Ashlyn couldn’t see any of her kids though and wondered who was with them inside the gym. She struggled with what to do first for only a split second before walking quickly down the hall and hugging Ali from behind. She inhaled deeply as she wrapped her arms around the beautiful brunette and squeezed her, burying her face in the back of her hair and nuzzling her nose up against her head.

“No, we need to talk. Just be there.”

Ashlyn heard her wife’s clipped tone and hushed voice and knew something was up. Before she could even ask her about it, Ali turned in her arms and threw her arms around her neck in a tight hug.

“Oh I’m so glad to see you. I missed you” the brunette greeted her earnestly.

“I missed you too sweetheart” the keeper mumbled into her wife’s neck as she leaned back and lifted her off the ground for a few seconds. “I love you” she said with a smile after she gave her a chaste kiss. 

“I love you too” Ali replied with her own smile as they pulled apart and Ashlyn went into the gym to help coach the practice portion of the hour.

“Mama!” 

Ali heard the chorus of her children’s voices as Ashlyn surprised them just inside the second door where they had, hopefully, been behaving for Ken Krieger while she was on the phone. Ali cringed when she heard all three little kids try to tell the keeper about Lily’s bloody injury. Ashlyn gave her wife a concerned and annoyed look.

“She’s ok, I promise” she assured the blonde. “Go on, Drew’s waiting for you.”

Practice went fine and was sometimes more fun to watch than the actual game itself. The coach took them all through the drills he wanted them to do and Ashlyn and the other assistant coach both helped remind the little boys what they were supposed to do after they promptly forgot, every time. Ken loved every minute of it. It was his first time seeing Drew play basketball. His scouting schedule hadn’t worked out at all for any of the six games his oldest grandchild had played last year. Just as the game itself started, a half hour later, Ashlyn saw Sam come into the gym through the second door and then both he and Ali went back out into the hallway for a few minutes. The next time she looked over Ali was in her chair with Josie on her lap, while Ken held Lily in his. Dodge stood between their two sets of legs with Ali’s arm ready to reach out and grab him whenever necessary. Sam was standing in the corner with some other parents, talking and laughing. The keeper couldn’t figure out what was going on, but she knew something wasn’t right. Ashlyn was exhausted from her extremely early morning and the four-hour flight, but she wasn’t just imagining things. She had definitely overheard her wife’s abrupt phone call in the hall. Who in the world could she have been having that conversation with? And be where? All she could do was get through the rest of the game, get everybody home for lunch and then naps. She and Ali could talk then.

Ken, Sam and Ethan all joined them at the big old house for lunch after the game. Ken had to go home and check on poor, sick Vicki so he said his goodbyes before Ali and Ashlyn took the three little kids up for their naps. Lily was particularly clingy with Ashlyn, wanting to make sure she knew how serious her injury had been the evening before, so it took her a little longer upstairs. When she came down the front stairs Ethan and Drew were playing a video game and Sam and Ali were sitting on opposite ends of the L bend couch watching them with Sam commenting on the gameplay. The keeper sat next to her wife, frustrated that they still had guests, and she could feel the tension coming off of the brunette. She put her arm around Ali’s shoulders and pressed a kiss into her cheek as the brunette squeezed and then patted her thigh. The boys celebrated a big score and pulled everyone’s attention back to the game. They sat there like that for several minutes and Ashlyn finally began to involve herself with the boys, enthusiastically asking them about the new level they had just unlocked and that she hadn’t seen yet. Ali patted her wife’s leg again, got up and went through the mudroom into the kitchen.

“I’m just gonna clean up” she called over her shoulder, heading for the lunch mess in the sink.

Ashlyn watched her go and then began asking Drew about the video game. Sam clarified a couple of things for her when the boys weren’t able to explain the answers well enough and then he stood up and left the room too.

“Listen to me very carefully Sam” Ali’s voice was low and serious and she looked up at him as they stood side by side at the kitchen sink. She waited for him to meet her eyes before continuing. “I’m not sure what gave you the idea that I was looking for something outside of my marriage, but I am not interested in anybody but my wife.” She squinted her eyes a bit, trying to see if her message was getting through. She didn’t know how else to word it. She didn’t want to attack him or embarrass him, but she wanted to make sure that things were crystal clear between them. “Do you understand me?”

“Yes...I guess...” he stammered and frowned, confused. He kept his voice low too, not wanting anyone to overhear their conversation. “I mean, I didn’t make all of this up. You kissed me back. And you sure sounded and acted like you were enjoying it last night” he challenged, still trying to understand how he could have misinterpreted her signals.

“I was drunk last night and when I finally realized that I wasn’t kissing Ashlyn I stopped” she replied tersely. She felt nauseous again at the thought of the kiss they shared and swallowed hard. “Why on earth did you kiss me Sam? You know I’m married. You know I love my wife...”

“I...I thought you wanted me to” he sounded defeated but then, after only a second or two, he stood up straighter and got a serious look on his face. “I know you wanted me to” he asserted, his voice still quiet but more urgent now, and turned to face her. “If you have to make up some story to explain away the feelings you have for me then that’s on you. But I’m not going to pretend that I’m the only one who’s feeling things...” he put his hand on her arm and gently rubbed it as he spoke.

“You are the only one who’s feeling anything other than friendship” she clarified with an agitated shake of her head. “This is what I wanted to talk to you about. None of the rest of this even matters anymore. What happened, happened and I can’t go back and change it – even though I wish to God I could. But I’m telling you with my words so you don’t have to try and interpret anything else...nothing is going to happen between us. Ever.”

She paused to make sure her words had hit their mark, their eyes locked together and their bodies only a foot apart as they tried to have a discreet conversation about their indiscretion last night. Sam’s hand was still on her forearm and he moved it up to her bicep with a soft squeeze. What neither of them realized was that Ashlyn had been standing in the mudroom watching the emotional and secretive exchange since shortly after Sam left the front living room. The keeper felt sick to her stomach as she took in the scene at the other end of the kitchen. She couldn’t hear what they were saying but it was obvious that Ali was upset and angry with Sam and that he was trying to soothe her. Ashlyn felt bile in the back of her throat as she watched him touch her wife’s arm so familiarly, so intimately. At first the blonde thought the tension between Sam and Ali had been caused by one of the kids. Maybe Ethan and Drew had fought about something or maybe one of the other kids had done something to upset Sam or Ethan and that’s what Ali needed to talk to the widower about. And that would have been ok, even the covert conversation in the kitchen could have been explained away – Ali didn’t want to bother Ashlyn with it because she had just flown home and was exhausted and it hadn’t been anything serious anyway. But as she stood there and saw him put his hand on Ali that way, like it had been there before, the keeper knew there was something much different going on between the two of them. She felt like she was going to be sick.

Before she could even make a move to the bathroom that was only a few feet away, she saw Sam close the distance between he and Ali and kiss her, hard. He put his other hand on her hip and pulled her into his body, but before he could move his other hand up to hold her head in place, Ali leaned back and slapped him across the face. It wasn’t the best or hardest slap and Ashlyn knew her wife would want that one back. She knew she could do better and was surprised that the slap was what her brain had chosen to focus on in that second. Ashlyn made herself wait another few seconds. She remembered how Ali had let her handle the situation with Paula the intern by herself and wanted to try and give the brunette the same chance. But Sam didn’t back off, even after the slap. He put more pressure on Ali and held their bodies close together while he tried to kiss her again. Ali pushed against his shoulders with both hands and that was all Ashlyn could take. She moved into the kitchen swiftly, covering half the distance in three quick strides. She didn’t want to make a scene in front of the boys so she summoned every bit of self-control that she had as she moved closer to them.

“What the fuck are you doing Sam?” Ashlyn’s voice was as low as theirs had been but there was a fury in it that Ali had never heard before. It didn’t even sound like her keeper, at all.

“Ash...I...” the brunette looked at her wife and didn’t know what to say. She looked crushed and defeated and broken as Sam quickly let go of her and took a step back.

“What the fuck is the matter with you?” Ashlyn kept her focus entirely on their friend as she spat out the words like daggers. She could see Ali start to cry out of her peripheral vision and she was so torn about what to do. Every fiber of her being wanted to pound the shit out of Sam and her hands were already clenched into tight fists at her sides. But she also felt an overwhelming urge to comfort her wife and make sure she was ok. In some sort of compromise, she reached her left arm out towards Ali and welcomed her into her grasp, pulling the brunette to her and tucking her against her left side. She wrapped her left arm around Ali’s shoulders and squeezed her tightly, without ever taking her eyes off of Sam. “Can you not hear me?” she asked him in that same low, rage-filled voice. “I know your fucking tongue works because it was just in my wife’s mouth.”

She was standing three feet away from him now, with Ali under her arm, her head buried in Ashlyn’s chest. She was just as angry as she had been a minute ago and he still hadn’t said a goddamned word. To his credit, he looked devastated and horrified and genuinely remorseful. And that might have been the only thing that saved him from the full fury Ashlyn felt. He looked fucking pathetic as he leaned back against the kitchen counter next to the sink. His shoulders were slumped and he dropped his chin down to his chest and closed his eyes in an act of utter submission.


	21. My Wife

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I won't be able to post on Saturday so this is tomorrow's chapter. Also, I wouldn't leave you hanging like that. #nocliffies

“You’d better say something Sam because I’m really starting to lose my fucking patience” Ashlyn’s voice was beginning to show similar signs and there was a new urgency to her words.

The widower finally met Ashlyn’s eyes and his were full of emotion and anguish when he spoke.

“I’m sorry” he began shakily. “I’m so sorry Ali” he spoke directly to the brunette who turned her head so she could see him. He grimaced when he saw her beautiful but troubled face staring back at him with confusion and anger all over it. “This is all my fault and...fuck...I’m really sorry” he shook his head and lowered his eyes for a few seconds.

“What’s going on with you?” Ashlyn asked, her voice noticeably less angry despite her best efforts to maintain the fury. All she saw was a broken man who had lost the love of his life and was now completely demolished as he stood there in her kitchen. She couldn’t make the leap to actually feeling sorry for him just yet – he had just forced a kiss on her wife and that was never going to be ok in any way no matter how screwed up he was. “Tell me what got into your head that made you think this was the right thing to do.”

“I don’t have an excuse” he answered honestly, looking Ashlyn in the eye. “Except that I thought she had feelings for me too.”

“You’re in love with my wife?”

“No...” he lied. “But I have feelings for her and I guess I misread...everything” he glanced down again before moving his eyes to the brunette. “I’m so sorry Ali. I never meant to hurt you. God, that’s the last thing I wanted.”

“What did you want?” Ali spoke for the first time, still under Ashlyn’s arm but no longer crying or fearful. Her voice was soft but not weak. 

“I thought...I thought there was a chance we could be together. That that was something you wanted too...”

“But why would you think that?” Ali repeated her question from earlier with a confused frown.

There was a long silence as the two women waited for Sam’s reply. Ali could feel Ashlyn’s whole body still tense and ready to spring into action. But she could also tell that the blonde felt sorry for Sam, which is why she hadn’t lost her temper and thrown him out of the house, or worse, yet.

“Keep talking Sam” Ashlyn looked over her shoulder towards the mudroom. “You picked a shitty time and place to do this so you’d better hurry the fuck up before one of the kids comes in here.”

The thought of Ethan walking in on this scene was all the motivation he needed. Sam was apparently nowhere near perfect, but he was a really good dad and he didn’t want his son to know anything about this.

“Alright, alright...” he rubbed his hands over his face and took a deep breath, speaking faster now. “I wasn’t sure what to think after we kissed the first time. That was such a strange moment and it happened so fast and I was so messed up and then you didn’t say anything and I thought it was just a dream or something” he smiled sadly. 

“When was this?” Ashlyn asked, obviously angry that this hadn’t been the first time something like this had happened.

“At the Holiday concert” Sam frowned from one woman to the next, surprised to learn that Ali hadn’t told her wife about it.

Ali felt Ashlyn’s body stiffen in her arms and her heart rate double without showing any outwards signs of how upset she was.

“When Ethan’s picture came up and I followed him offstage...” Ali started to explain, feeling sick again at the thought of both the kiss and the fact that she kept it a secret from her wife. “Sam was really upset, sobbing and...”

“I totally lost my shit” he interrupted. “Ali came out to try and put the pieces back together so I could help Ethan...so I could be a father to my son when he needed me most.”

“And, then, in the middle of it, he just kissed me, out of the blue and really fast and before I even knew what happened he was crying again and asking me what he should do for Ethan...” Ali continued the story, letting go of Ashlyn’s body and standing beside her wife instead of under her arm. “It was so weird Ash, I didn’t know what to think or say or do...”

“She told me to get my shit together and be strong for Ethan, that’s what she did. And then we went back inside to help the kids get offstage.”

“And you’re just talking about this now?” Ashlyn’s voice was flat and even and Ali could tell she was absolutely pissed at both of them. “That’s what led to today’s big talk?” she looked at Ali and then refocused her attention to Sam.

“We didn’t see each other until this past week so we never got a chance to talk about it” he replied. “Then, last night when we should have talked about it...”

“What the fuck happened last night?” the keeper’s glare was firmly fixed on their guest and her jaw flexed several times as she listened to his answer.

Sam looked at Ali which incensed Ashlyn. It looked like they were trying to get their stories straight and, for a split second, she felt like a fool for trusting her wife. Maybe Ali had encouraged Sam after all? How would that even be possible? Ashlyn’s blood pressure rose and she had a hard time hearing anything over the pounding in her ears.

“She came right to the game from the airport” Ali explained to Sam with a dismissive shake of her head. Now she felt like they were both fucking judging her. “We haven’t had a chance to talk about anything yet, except Lily’s lip.” She turned her attention to Ashlyn. “And Sam and I haven’t talked at all about any of this either. That’s what I wanted to do today. So there wouldn’t be any more confusion about anything” she said brusquely.

“What the fuck happened last night” Ashlyn spoke each word quietly and slowly as she tried to control her temper.

“Julie came over to help with Lily and it got late and we all just decided to order pizza and have dinner together” Ali explained. 

“Jules and I went to high school together and we got talking and laughing after the kids were in bed, and before any of us realized it, we had finished three bottles of wine and were pretty drunk” Sam offered. “Ethan was already asleep in Drew’s room so I crashed on the couch” he nodded his head towards the family room.

“And he kissed me” Ali admitted quietly and looked down, ashamed that she had let it happen.

“And she stopped me” he added. “But before we could talk about it...”

“I got sick and ran to the bathroom. I think I must have fallen asleep in there” she dropped her eyes again, more embarrassed than she could ever remember being in her life. “When I finally came out he was already passed out on the couch so I just went up to bed. I thought we could talk this morning...”

“But when I woke up I couldn’t believe what had happened and...I... I guess I was just embarrassed so I picked up Ethan and we left before anybody else was awake.”

“So that’s why you said you had to talk today” Ashlyn was slowly putting things together. “When I hugged you at the gym and you were on the phone?”

“Yes, that was Sam” Ali nodded. “I didn’t want to let any more time go by than we already had. I didn’t want there to be any confusion like after the holiday concert...”

“So why the fuck are you kissing her again after she finally told you nothing was going to happen?” Ashlyn’s eyes flashed with anger as she looked at Sam again. She pushed the images out of her head of the two of them on the couch last night in some sort of clinch, remembering the story of Ali being only in her bra on Thursday when he had brought Drew into the house. So many images to push aside right now. Fuck. “That’s what I really want to know. I saw her slap you across the face and you still tried to kiss her again after that. That’s not ok Sam. That’s different than the drunk kiss, right?”

“Right” Sam nodded slowly and swallowed hard.

“That’s different than the first kiss where you were falling apart about your wife and son, right?”

“Right” his voice was quieter and his eyes were trained on the tile floor. “It was wrong and awful and I just...I was so happy last night and this morning thinking that there might have been a chance” he lifted his eyes and looked sadly from one woman to the other. “And then, when she told me it was never going to happen...well, I didn’t want to believe her...”

“What was the plan if I hadn’t come into the room?” Ashlyn folded her arms across her chest and stared at him hard. “She had already slapped you, so, what? Were you just going to rape her right here on the kitchen floor?”

“Ashlyn...” Ali gasped out at the same time that Sam yelled out.

“No!” he met Ashlyn’s stare. “I would never hurt her” he shook his head from side to side. “I just...I lost my head for a minute. I would never hurt you” he said to Ali with nothing but adoration in his eyes.

The brunette believed him and she wasn’t sure she could explain why, not even to herself. She just knew he was telling the truth.

“I think you’d better leave Sam” the keeper hadn’t moved a muscle as she watched both of them respond to her question. “Ethan can stay. I’ll bring him home before dinnertime. There’s no reason he has to suffer.”

“But...” Ali started to ask, giving her wife a confused look.

“We have a lot of things to talk about” Ashlyn cut her off and met her eyes. “But I can’t have him in my house anymore.” She turned back to Sam. “I’ll let you know how things are gonna go, once I figure it out. But until then you stay away from my family. Got it?”

He nodded and started to walk past Ashlyn towards the mudroom. She grabbed his bicep and squeezed it much too hard, making him wince.

“You seem to be a little slow on the uptake so I’m gonna need to be sure you understand what I just said” she practically sneered at him as they stood shoulder to shoulder.

He was taller than she was and nicely built. He wasn’t some scrawny little guy. But he wasn’t anywhere near as big as Kyle or Chris or Ryan. Ali held her breath for what felt like forever as the two stood there, battling for dominance and possession. She wasn’t sure who would win if they did decide to fight, but she knew better than to bet against Ashlyn. The posturing was disgusting, really, and it made Ali angry as she watched the both of them. All of the times the keeper had said ‘my wife’ and ‘my house’ and ‘my family’ were ringing in her ears and the way she took control over deciding what was going to happen, as if Ali didn’t even have a say in it, really pissed the brunette off. Somehow Ali felt like the bad guy. She rolled her eyes, turned on her heel and went up the backstairs, not even waiting for the drama to finish playing out behind her.

“I get it Ash” Sam replied evenly and yanked his arm out of her grip. “I’ll just say goodbye to the boys and then I’ll go. But if we can find a way so my son doesn’t lose his best friend... I’d really appreciate it.”

“Well you should have thought about that before you decided to come after my wife.”

//

Ali thought her wife would come upstairs so they could talk about everything. They had a little less than 2 hours before the little kids were up from their naps and it would have probably been enough time to work through it all so they could start to put it behind them. But after 30 minutes went by the brunette went back downstairs to find out what was taking Ashlyn so long. Except Ashlyn wasn’t downstairs. The boys had some snacks and juice so she had obviously spent some time with them. Ali stood in the living room for a minute and tried to think. She could see Ashlyn’s Jeep, the Suburu coupe, the minivan and the truck all in the driveway. But the dogs were gone. She must have taken them for a walk. It was January 18th and very cold outside so she hoped she wouldn’t be dumb and stay away too long out of spite. The keeper had a habit of doing that.

“Mommy, can Ethan eat dinner with us?” Drew’s sweet little voice interrupted her mounting agitation at her wife.

“No sweetheart” she replied with a warm smile. “Not tonight. I think you’ve played enough of that video game for a while. Turn it off and let’s play something else until the kids get up.”

“Awww” he whined while Ethan moaned his displeasure too.

What the brunette really wanted was to take a nap and for her splitting headache to go away. But since neither of those things was very likely to happen any time soon, she decided she was going to do one of her favorite things instead. Play with her oldest baby while the younger ones were all asleep. Instead of a relaxing nap she enjoyed a few rousing games of Candyland with Drew and Ethan.

Ashlyn didn’t come home until 4:30pm just as it was getting dark. She quickly fed the dogs and then rushed into the front living room which was a disaster zone. There were three different board games out with pieces strewn everywhere, at least six different wood puzzles were scattered all over the floor, and there were crayons covering the coffee table and most of the floor surrounding it. Ali was in the middle of the floor trying to keep everybody happy or at least away from each other’s throats. She had finally given up on Drew and Ethan and just let them go watch a show in the family room to eliminate some of the bodies from the front living room. It had been a very long, trying hour since the nappers had been awake and very active. The brunette had enjoyed the first hour with the boys and she had almost been able to forget about how angry she was with Ashlyn for just leaving, again. But with every challenging minute that passed during the second hour, her anger at the blonde increased. She was so angry that she honestly wasn’t sure what to do with herself. She thought about just leaving herself for once. Maybe she would just go spend the night at Sydney’s house or Carm’s house or at her mom’s empty condo, which sounded like a slice of heaven right at the moment, and let Ashlyn see what it was like to be shut out and left behind wondering where your wife was and what was going to happen next.

“I’m sorry I’m so late” the blonde apologized immediately, correctly reading the room and her wife’s mood. “We stopped to see old Mrs. Ornstein and it took a lot longer than I meant it to.”

Ashlyn sat on the couch and let the kids all climb up onto her lap for a big tickle and wrestle fest. She tried to catch Ali’s eye but the brunette just got up and left the room without saying a word. Ali knew instantly that her wife was telling the truth. Old Mrs. Ornstein had been old when Ashlyn had inherited the house ten years ago. She was downright ancient now, in her 90s, and a lot less mobile so it was hard for her to get out. Her dog had died a few years ago and she missed him terribly so Ashlyn tried to take Persey and Fred to visit once a week or so. And the keeper had a hard time leaving the old woman when it was time to end the visit. It was one of her weak spots – leaving an old person alone. Typical Ashlyn doing something sweet and nice while Ali was angry with her. Even her being nice frustrated the brunette in that moment. 

“Ok Ethan” the keeper stood next to the two boys on the family room couch. “Time for me to take you home. Drew, do you want to come for the ride?”

Ashlyn ended up taking Dodge too and having a boys trip. Even though it was only ten minutes there and ten minutes back, it was a welcome respite for Ali and her aching head. By the time they were back home, the brunette had taken some Tylenol, guzzled two big glasses of water, and sat quietly by herself in the nook while the girls colored together in the front living room. There were no tvs on and no racket of any kind...just peaceful, creative coloring and quiet. It seemed silly when she thought about it later, but that twenty minutes may have changed the whole course of the next year of their lives. Ali felt a lot more like herself, and like she could navigate the rest of the evening without losing her mind. She also realized that as much as it felt like the earth had just shifted beneath her feet that afternoon, she was still standing. The house was still standing. Her marriage was still standing and her family was still standing too. That’s all the mattered. The brunette, in a moment of utter clarity, flashed back to the fight she and Ashlyn had had after Josie had been born. The fight that nearly ruined everything. Ali had promised herself that she would never be that stubborn or petty again, no matter how aggrieved she felt. Those dark dark days that summer had taught her a powerful lesson. And then the terrifying accident that had almost taken her wife and son from her had only magnified what she had already learned. 

There had been fights between them since then, of course, but nothing earth-shattering. They argued about chores and silly day to day life things but never anything truly important. Their last big fight had been in October when Ashlyn’s young fan had turned up on their porch. Ali wanted her wife to be more discerning when she shared things with the world, which was an ongoing battle between the two women. And Ashlyn thought the brunette had overreacted. Ali’s whole point had finally been made when she bluntly explained that the sweet and confused girl could easily have been a psycho with a gun in her bag for all they knew. 

“Why would you even take the risk?!” she had yelled back at her wife who still thought the brunette was making a big fuss over nothing. “I don’t understand why you’re not getting this Ashlyn” Ali was pacing up and back next to her side of the bed. “You fucking played chicken with a speeding car to protect our son but you can’t see how this is the same fucking thing?”

“It’s not even close to the same thing...”

“It’s exactly the same thing, except that there are four of them now that need your protection!!”

“She was just a confused and probably depressed girl” Ashlyn sat on her side of the bed, suddenly struck by how upset the brunette had become. 

“I know babe” Ali tried to calm herself down by leaning against the mantel of the fireplace behind where she had been pacing. She rested her forearms on the mantel and then leaned her head down on them and took a few deep breaths. When she spoke again she never lifted her head, talking through her forearms and into the fireplace. “But what if she hadn’t been? What if she was mentally unstable and dangerous? What if she thought she was your girlfriend and wanted me out of the way? What if she believed some fantasy in her head that had nothing to do with reality and wanted to hurt our kids?” She paused and let the incredible what ifs sink in. “I know it sounds crazy” she turned around to face the room again, worry creasing her face. “But it always sounds crazy until it’s not. And then it’s too late. And I just...” her words stuck in her throat as she was overcome with emotion, “I don’t get why you would even take the risk. Aren’t we worth more to you than that? Is sharing a little less of you with the world too much to ask if it means those kids might be safer?” she pointed towards the door to the second-floor hallway as the tears began to fall down her cheeks.

That night back in October they had hugged and cried together as Ashlyn finally understood the potential gravity of the situation. She would never have compared it to the car accident she and Drew had survived but it was that stark image that finally helped her see it from Ali’s point of view. 

When Ali thought about what had happened that afternoon in the kitchen with Sam, she wondered how big the fight would be between she and her keeper. She honestly thought, and hoped, that they would be able to talk it out fairly simply. But that’s what made her nervous. The last time she knew Ashlyn might be a little upset about her methods, but not so much about the actual decision she had made, was postponing their honeymoon. And that had been a colossal fuck-up that Ali had completely misjudged. Were they heading for a fight of those proportions tonight? She sure hoped not. All she knew was that she wasn’t playing games and she wasn’t going to let her temper get the better of her. Life was too fucking short for petty snits and they were both guilty of doing it from time to time.

“Thank you” she surprised Ashlyn, when she got home, by hugging her tightly as soon as the keeper walked into the kitchen to see what the plan was for dinner.

Drew and Dodge were already arguing about whatever they had discussed during the ride home but Ali didn’t care. All she cared about was that Ashlyn was home and in her arms, even if just for a momentary truce. 

“For what?” Ashlyn asked, not sure if she was supposed to return the hug or not. Before she could decide, Ali pulled away enough to look up into her beautiful face.

“For giving me a chance to reset” she tried to explain. “I don’t feel great today and all of that certainly didn’t help” she nodded towards the kitchen sink where the incident with Sam had occurred. “I was really feeling lost and angry and confused and hurt and...” she rolled her eyes and shrugged her shoulders, “just, too many things and I was starting to get overwhelmed while you were gone...”

“Al, I’m really sorry...”

“I know you are” she squeezed her keeper quickly. “Anyway, just...thank you for giving me a few minutes to just sit still. I really needed it.”

Ashlyn just looked at her in confusion, with a small, guilty smile on her face, knowing she was getting credit she didn’t really deserve.

“All I did was drive Ethan home...”

“Yes, but you left me with just two girls who quietly colored the whole time you were gone...” she beamed as she said the words.

“Ahh, gotcha” Ashlyn nodded knowingly. “Happy to help.”

“Look, I know we need to talk and I know we can’t do it now” Ali continued. “But I don’t want to fight with you Ash. I can’t take it...”

“I don’t want to fight either, but Ali...” the blonde’s face got serious. “I’m really upset...”

“I know you are. And I am too” the brunette added, and got a look of surprise from her wife. “Let’s just try and have a nice evening with the kids and then talk tonight. I love you and nothing has changed that. Ok?”

Ashlyn nodded as the decibel level started to rise now that everyone was under one roof again. Their fleeting few moments were over and it would have to be ok for the next 3-1/2 hours or so while they fed, bathed and read to their children before putting them to bed that Saturday night.

When the keeper finally made her way downstairs she found Ali waiting for her on the couch in the family room. The brunette was sitting with her back to the windows this time, which was normally Ashlyn’s spot, and she had poured them each a drink. The tumbler in front of Ashlyn’s half of the couch had three fingers of whiskey covering the whiskey stones at the bottom of it. And, as much as Ali didn’t want another drop of alcohol in her system now that it was finally feeling better, there was a small vodka tonic sitting in front of her. She was afraid she might need it to help settle her nerves. She smiled up at the blonde as she stood next to the coffee table with a strange look on her face.

“What’s wrong?” Ali tilted her head to the side.

“Umm” Ashlyn paused and rubbed her hands over her face. “I feel stupid about this, but can we not do this here” she nodded at the couch with a sheepish look on her face.

It took the brunette a minute before she understood that her wife didn’t want to sit and have this conversation on the same couch where Ali and Sam had gotten cozy not even 24 hours earlier.

“Oh shit, I didn’t even think about that” she stood up and handed the whiskey tumbler to Ashlyn before picking up her own drink from the coffee table. “Yeah, anywhere you want.”

Ashlyn stood there for a minute, unsure where to go. That couch was their spot for all of these hard conversations. She stared at it as she took a sip of her drink and Ali stood there awkwardly waiting for her to pick another place. After another minute the brunette felt her temper flare up.

“No, actually, we’re going to have this conversation where we always have these conversations because this is our fucking house and this is our fucking couch and one stupid, meaningless, drunken kiss isn’t going to change any of that” she said defiantly as she sat down in her usual spot, with her back to the fireplace and kitchen beyond. She was not letting Sam Machado destroy anything inside the big old house. Not one fucking thing.

Ashlyn just stood there for another thirty seconds.

“Seriously Ashlyn?” Ali cocked her head and gave her a challenging look.

“Well I’m sorry if I’m not wild about sitting on the couch where someone else made out with my wife last night” her words were a little sharper than she meant them to be but she was misinterpreting Ali’s anger at Sam and the situation for anger at her.

“Don’t do that” Ali shook her head and set her jaw. “Don’t exaggerate and don’t make it into something that it never was. Don’t give it any extra power over us.”

“Well I don’t know what it was or what it wasn’t!” Ashlyn replied with heat.

“That’s what I want to tell you if you’ll sit down and talk with me like a fucking grown up!” the brunette’s reply was just as hot but Ashlyn still didn’t move. “Oh for fuck’s sake. Ok, you want a blow by blow? Here’s what happened. And remember, we each drank a fucking bottle of wine over the span of about three hours, so factor that in too.”

Ashlyn took another sip and held her ground, eagerly waiting for her wife to continue.

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

“He walked Julie home because she was even more drunk than we were” Ali started, her voice still pissed off but not officially yelling. “I brought down a sheet, a blanket and one of the spare pillows and was making up the couch for him when he came back in.” She got up and repeated her movements from the night before. “I forget what he said but I turned my head to look at him and I got really dizzy and lost my balance. He grabbed my elbow and helped me sit on the couch. Then he sat next to me and was sweet and kind like he always is. Nothing out of the ordinary at all.”

“So how did that turn into kissing?”

“Well, you’ll really have to ask him for the motivation” she quirked her eyebrow at the keeper, still aggravated that any of this was even happening. “But he started to rub my neck...”

Ashlyn sighed heavily and rolled her eyes.

“Oh come on, it wasn’t anything you haven’t done a million times for Syd or Dom or Julie for that matter...”

“Julie?” Ashlyn’s eyebrows went up.

“Yes Julie. You gave her a neck rub the second time we went over there for dinner for Christ’s sake” the brunette took a sip of her drink as Ashlyn’s face scrunched up in thought and then fell when she realized Ali was right. “So yeah, he rubbed my neck and it felt good. And do you know what I was thinking about?” she shot her wife another challenging look. “You. I was thinking about how great you did at the draft and how hot you looked and how funny you were and how much I loved you.”

She stopped talking and lifted her face and eyes up to the ceiling as she tried to stop the tears from spilling down her cheeks. It was impossible for Ashlyn not to see how truthful she was being and the blonde felt a pang of guilt. Ali hadn’t asked for this to happen any more than the keeper had. And that’s when Ashlyn understood why the brunette was so aggravated as they talked. She was mad that they even had to do this, just because Sam did something stupid. She was pissed at him and the situation he had put them in. 

“And then he leaned over and kissed me. Fucking jackass.”

“Who? Him or me?” the keeper asked softly, hoping and praying that she could pull off the tiny joke and lighten the mood a bit.

Ali just stared at her, her expression impossible to read. Her eyes were red and puffy and she looked tired and worn out from her very stressful few days. They stared at each other for almost thirty seconds and Ashlyn was just about to apologize when she heard the laugh start low in Ali’s throat.

“Him, you big jerk” Ali finally answered with a less than energetic chuckle. “Are we joking about this already? I’m so confused” she buried her head in her hands and felt her wife sit next to her, on her right.

“This wasn’t where he was sitting, right?” she teased again and felt a huge wave of relief when Ali smacked her arm.

“No, he was over there” she moved her head to her left side and then leaned back into her wife with another sigh. “I’m so sorry Ashlyn” she shook her head sadly as they held hands.

“I know you are baby” the keeper’s words were soft and soothing. “I know you didn’t want this to happen” she ran her thumb in circles on the back of Ali’s hand and pressed a kiss into the side of her head. “I’m sorry you were stuck in this position.”

“It didn’t mean anything, I swear to God...” she looked up imploringly at Ashlyn’s beautiful, tired face. “You have to believe me.”

“I do believe you. I do.”

“You do?”

“Of course I do. Just because he wanted more with you doesn’t mean you wanted anything to do with him.”

Ali gave her a questioning look.

“You’re being really...good about this...”

“Well, let’s just say it’s a good thing we didn’t talk right after Sam left” she chuckled.

“But Ash, that’s what made me mad – you left and we didn’t get a chance to talk...”

“You already told me what happened” she shrugged. “Was there more to tell? Did you leave something out?” she asked calmly as she kept playing with Ali’s fingers in her hand.

“No, but...”

“That’s what I thought. And while I was walking the dogs I tried to switch our positions and imagine what I would have done. And then I thought about all the times women have hugged me and kissed me and grabbed me over the years, sometimes right in front of you, and you never once got mad at me for it. Not one single time. You knew I wasn’t interested in them, just like I know you don’t want to have sex with Sam.”

Ali made a disgusted face that made Ashlyn chuckle when she saw it.

“See, you’ve never had a very good poker face Krieger” she laughed softly and brought their lips together in a simple kiss.

“It’s still not funny” Ali shook her head. “I feel so terrible that I let it happen and I keep going over everything in my head to see what I could have done differently.”

“And?”

“And I can’t come up with anything” she shrugged. “Except I wish I had told you about the first kiss. But I knew there was a good chance I was going to regret that as soon as I made that decision.”

“So why did you make it then?”

Ali spent several minutes explaining how strange that whole holiday concert encounter had been and then she told Ashlyn about Kyle’s then best friend and the sex and grief blurry line that his therapist had told him about. 

“I honestly thought he might not have known he did it” she shrugged. “I know it sounds stupid now, but at the time, it made more sense to me than the idea that he had feelings for me. And if he didn’t know about it or remember it then nothing had to change, for any of us. Ethan and Drew could still be best friends and everything would still be good.”

“He had never made a pass at you before or crossed any boundaries before or anything like that?” the keeper asked one of the questions that had bothered her all afternoon.

“No, nothing. All we had ever done was share a friendly hug, and not even that often. I told you about the time he broke down in his kitchen at Halloween and then when he opened up about his brother...”

Ashlyn nodded and felt the whiskey helping the gears in her head turn a little easier. It was helping her see past the blinding rage she had felt that afternoon in the kitchen.

“Then, yeah, maybe I can understand why you didn’t tell me” she paused. “I still wish you had though.”

“I do too” Ali agreed with a sad nod. “I promise I won’t keep anything like that from you again, but you have to be able to be mature about it if I do” she met her wife’s hazel eyes and tried to read them. “Ok?”

“Ok. But I think I handled it pretty maturely today. Don’t you?” it was Ashlyn’s turn to challenge the brunette. “I wanted to punch his lights out.”

“You were really good today honey, for the most part.”

“What part wasn’t good?” Ashlyn frowned.

“Well, for someone without a dick, you sure acted like one at times. There was an awful lot of testosterone in that kitchen and I didn’t appreciate being talked about like a piece of property.” She tried to keep her voice calm and even because she didn’t want things to go wrong when they had come so far already that night. “You were both pretty gross there at the end.”

“What are you talking about?” Ashlyn sat up and distanced herself a few inches as she gave her wife an angry look.

“Ash, I don’t think you did it on purpose, calm down. I’m not accusing you of being a Neanderthal.”

“Give me an example.”

“Well, you said you couldn’t have Sam in your house anymore” Ali started, carefully choosing her words. “The last time I checked, this was our house and it was our family. Not just yours.” She paused and could see the wheels turning in her keeper’s head. “And I have a name. I’m a person. You called me your wife about six times and none of them were the kind that make me feel good.”

“But you are my wife” she frowned in confusion. “Just like I’m yours. How is calling you my wife a problem?”

“I love when you call me your wife. You know I do, but in that particular conversation you could have substituted any other object in the house for ‘wife’ and had the same effect.” She tried to find a better way to explain it. “It was just very possessive and made me feel like something else you owned, like the dishwasher or the chair...”

“I don’t know about that one” she shook her head as she thought hard about what Ali was saying. “I get the ‘my house’ thing. That was a dick thing to say and I didn’t even realize I said it like that. I’m sorry.” Ashlyn sat back against the couch again and took another sip of whiskey. “But you know I don’t think I own you, that’s ridiculous. I’m pissed that you even said that to me tonight.”

“Well, maybe it’s more of how I felt hearing it at the time then. I don’t know. I wasn’t at my best then and maybe I was oversensitive to it” Ali offered after thinking more about it. “But aside from that, yes, I thought you showed a lot of restraint and you did a great job not losing your cool. Really Ash, you did great” she smiled warmly and appreciatively at the blonde who still seemed a little mad about the possessive complaint. “I was afraid you were just going to deck him or physically throw him out of the house, not that he didn’t deserve it. I still can’t believe he tried to kiss me again” Ali shook her head as she remembered it. “How long were you watching us?”

“Pretty much as soon as he left the front living room” the keeper answered and swirled the alcohol in her tumbler.

“Why though?”

“I could tell something was wrong. I thought the kids had a fight or something, I had no idea what I was about to see...” her eyes went wide and she took a deep breath. “I couldn’t hear anything though.”

“But...” Ali frowned as she played back the scene in her head. “You told Sam you knew I told him nothing was going to happen between us...you didn’t actually hear me say that?”

“No, but I knew that’s what you told him, something along those lines anyway” she smiled at the brunette who was studying her with a funny look on her face. “Does that surprise you?” 

“I guess not...” Ali started to reply but then thought some more before finishing. “It makes me feel good that you knew that’s what I told him” she smiled thoughtfully. “Really good” her smile grew even bigger. “I love that actually.”

“I know the feeling” Ashlyn returned her smile and reached out to cup her cheek. “It’s hard to describe how great it feels when you find out just how much the woman of your dreams really trusts you. I’ll never forget how you never doubted me for a second with that trampy intern. I’m sorry the whole thing happened, obviously, but the silver lining was that feeling that came from it. It made it all worth it for me” she leaned forward and kissed Ali slowly and sweetly. “Of course I didn’t have to deal with all of the bullshit at the office” she giggled and kissed her again before pulling back.

“Ugh, Paula” Ali rolled her eyes at the unpleasant memory. She took another minute and thought back to that summer. “I remember you trying to explain that feeling to me and I thought I understood it, but” she shook her head, “now I finally do. And it does feel great.”

They were both quiet for several minutes, thinking through everything and processing all the new information and feelings as they sat side by side, holding hands. Ashlyn asked a few more questions and the brunette answered them honestly as best she could. Many of her questions revolved around the kisses themselves and whether or not Ali had kissed Sam back.

“I did kiss him back, last night, just for a second” she admitted slowly, unable to look at her keeper. “But I was drunk Ash, and I know that sounds like a terrible excuse but it’s really the truth. All that wine just made my reaction time slower. I was confused and I thought I was kissing you” she tried to explain. “It was you who helped me realize something was wrong though.”

“Me?”

“Yeah, you” Ali finally lifted her eyes and found the hazel ones she loved so much staring at her softly. “I kept thinking about watching you on tv, how good you looked and how well you did all night, and my brain finally started to figure out that if I had just watched you on tv from Houston that there was no way I could be kissing you. And that’s when I pushed him away.”

“How long?”

“I don’t know Ash” she replied so quietly the keeper could barely hear her. “Why does it matter?”

“I just...need to know” Ashlyn tried to give her a reassuring look but failed. “I’m not sure why, but I feel like it’ll bother me way more if I don’t know.”

Ali spent the next few minutes telling her wife exactly how each of the two kisses had gone, what they had felt like, and how she had felt during and after them. The brunette was mad, at first, that Ashlyn was making her do this. But she thought about Mattie, their therapist, explaining how Ashlyn’s over-active imagination could make any situation into something much worse. Her keeper needed to know the details so she didn’t invent her own that would probably be much worse. 

“So are we ok?” Ali asked after they had both been quiet for another ten minutes or so.

“Yeah, we’re ok baby” Ashlyn brought her wife’s hand up to her mouth and kissed it gently. “I’m sorry you had to go through all of that. Thank you for telling me everything...it helps me get past it. You know, my creative imagination...” she gave Ali a shy, almost apologetic look.

“I get it honey. Really, I do. And, as much as I’d rather not ever think about it ever again, if you need to ask me more questions you have to promise me that you will. I don’t want this to ever come back to haunt us in any way. No fucking way.”

“I promise Al. Thank you” she kissed Ali’s hand again and then nuzzled her cheek against it. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”


	22. Hunting & Perspective

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still happy for Ashlyn's start today and that awesome save she made. That's our keeper!
> 
> Hopefully this chapter helps everybody understand how Ali & Ashlyn handled the Sam issue the way they did.

The fallout from the Sam Machado affair was pretty straightforward. Ashlyn and Ali had talked more about it the next day, wanting to have some sort of decision made by Monday so if one of them ran into Sam at school it wouldn’t be quite so awkward. Ashlyn’s big concern was that she didn’t trust Sam around Ali anymore so she wanted to limit the time they spent alone as much as possible. Every new ‘rule’ they came up with was designed with that goal in mind. The keeper made sure her wife knew that it had nothing to do with how much she trusted her. It was all about not trusting Sam. So that meant no more assistant coach Machado at soccer as long as Ali was coaching. Ideally, they wouldn’t volunteer at school together either but Ashlyn knew that was going to be difficult to control. Ali assured her that she would do her best to avoid the situation, hopefully Sam wouldn’t be volunteering for the same things as she did, and they left it at that. Ethan was welcome at the big old house any time, for play dates, sleepovers, parties, anything 5-year old boys wanted to do. But Sam was not. Sam was not welcome at the Krieger household anymore. If he was dropping off or picking up Ethan, or Drew, he would stay in the driveway. Drew was, at least for the time being anyway, allowed to go to Ethan’s house too. And as long as Sam didn’t give them any reason to have a problem with that, it would be fine. Ashlyn was afraid Sam would start asking Drew about Ali or something stalker-y like that. But Ali had talked her down from that overreaction and gotten her to agree to let Drew go to Ethan’s house too. The keeper also wanted to be the one who went to Ethan’s house to do the pick-ups and drop-offs whenever possible. 

“I just don’t trust him anymore so the less he has to do with our family the better” Ashlyn explained again Monday night as they got into bed.

“He handled it pretty well” Ali commented as she set her alarm and turned off her light. She had left work early that afternoon and met Ashlyn and Sam near the school so they could talk in private before school got out. “I mean, it could have been so much worse. I know he brought it all on himself, but I feel bad for him” she took her glasses off and put them on the nightstand before settling under the covers.

“I know” Ashlyn sighed heavily as she rolled onto her side to face her beautiful brunette. “As much as I hate him, I feel bad for him too.”

“I’m so glad you told him that you hoped one day we could all put this behind us and get back to just being friends” Ali moved closer to her wife and intertwined their legs beneath the covers. “I know it’s a big if and it’ll be a long time coming, but I hope that happens. Thank you for saying it” she brought their lips together in a soft kiss.

“Well, if I can be friends with Sarah who I know was in love with you and who actually got to have sex with you...” Ashlyn winced as she said those words because, as cool as she finally was with Sarah and Erin being their friends, it always felt like a punch in the gut when she thought about Ali having sex with Sarah, “then I guess it’s entirely possible that I’ll find a way to make peace with Sam being in love with you too.”

“Awww, poor Ashlyn didn’t marry a virgin” Ali teased. “You know how I feel about this whole topic honey” she chuckled.

“I know, I know” Ashlyn grinned sheepishly at her and caressed her cheek with her thumb. “You will always win this debate because I had more girlfriends than you did...”

“Oh we’re going with just more girlfriends now? I thought it was a lot more girlfriends than me?” she interrupted playfully and kissed Ashlyn’s lips again.

“Fine, whatever, you’re right” she shook her head and closed her eyes in defeat. “And you will always win this debate because my ex-girlfriend spent the night before our wedding in the bedroom right next to us in our own house...”

“And interrupted us when we were trying to have sex!” Ali reminded the blonde with a roll of her eyes and chuckle. “I mean, I pretty much win everything in the whole damn exes category forever after that.”

“You’re absolutely right my queen.”

They both laughed and spent a couple of minutes kissing and touching each other, keeping things innocent because they were both still exhausted from their busy and stressful weekend.

“Speaking of Sarah” Ali began, unsure whether she should bring it up or not. “She tried to tell me Sam was falling for me. God that sounds awful when I say it out loud like that. I sound like an egomaniac or something.”

As thankful as the brunette was that Ashlyn had taken the Sam situation so well, she still felt guilty and remorseful. Ali blamed herself for letting it happen, even though there was very little she could have done to avoid Sam’s advances. And even though telling Ashlyn about the very first kiss at the holiday concert wouldn’t have done anything to stop Sam from kissing her again that night on the couch, Ali still wished she had just told her wife. At the time it had made sense to her to just let things be and hope that everything would go back to normal. Which it did, at least for a week anyway, once Ethan was back at school and Sam started interacting with the Kriegers again after the Christmas break. Ali really thought things would be normal between them and that there would be no further issue. Otherwise she would never have let him sleep on the couch, or even stay for dinner that night. She could be obtuse about the effect she had on some people, but she wasn’t a complete idiot. Her humility made it difficult for her to believe that Sam might have actually had feelings for her. And, although she was usually happy to be a humble person, there were times when it didn’t serve her well. Why had she found it so impossible to believe Sarah’s assessment that day?

“What? When?” Ashlyn’s eyes went wide at the revelation.

“When Whitney and I took them both up to Greenfield to look at the Academy property back in November.”

“Oh yeah, he went up to look over all the kitchen appliances...”

“He did, and he was very helpful and knowledgeable too” Ali replied. “But when Sarah and I went to do measurements and he and Whit went to the kitchen, Sarah asked me what was going on with him.”

“Was something going on back then?” Ashlyn’s heart skipped a beat at the thought.

“No, no, no” Ali shook her head and cupped her wife’s face, looking right into her eyes. “Nothing was ever going on. Ever. But Sarah saw something in him that day and she told me she thought he had feelings for me. I completely dismissed her and told her she was crazy. I told her I was thinking of setting him up with Liz” she sighed. “But I guess she was right.”

“Well, she knows that Krieger fever look pretty well” Ashlyn sighed and studied her wife’s face only a few inches in front of hers. “We should start a club or something...the Ali Krieger broken hearts club...”

“Stop it” Ali giggled and poked the blonde in her ribs.

“Ow” Ashlyn laughed and pulled her wife’s body right up tight to her own so there was no room for poking. “I guess, technically, I should have seen it too” she kissed Ali’s neck and held her close.

The truth was that the keeper was upset with herself for not seeing the Sam mess coming. She knew better than anyone how it felt to be around Ali Krieger and the lengths one might go to for some of her attention or affection. But Ashlyn hadn’t seen it coming. At all. As furious as she was with Sam – and she was fucking irate about his inappropriate behavior on all three occasions, she had tried her very best to keep that in check so they could handle the situation maturely and responsibly so the kids didn’t suffer. Drew was Ethan’s only close friend and Ethan was, by far, Drew’s best friend and favorite schoolmate. The compassionate keeper had found some of the strength she needed to control her temper that Saturday afternoon in the kitchen by focusing on those two little boys and what they meant to each other. She surprised even herself with how well that had worked. The keeper knew she would harbor some hatred in her heart for Sam Machado for a long time. But she had meant it when she told him she hoped they could someday find a way to be friends again. It certainly wasn’t going to be anytime soon though.

“I didn’t break your heart though” Ali pulled back just enough so she could see her keeper’s face, “did I?”

“What?” Ashlyn was touched by the pensive, worried look on her beautiful brunette’s face. “No, not really. Just a little bit before you broke up with Sarah.” She smiled softly at her wife and gave her a sweet kiss and they were quiet for a minute. There was no tension between them, just a comfortable, soft exchange of loving looks.

“She dumped my ass” Ali corrected with a shy chuckle.

“For which I’m thankful every single damned day” Ashlyn grinned.

“For what? My ass or the fact that she dumped it?” Ali giggled.

“Both. Obviously” the keeper moved a hand down Ali’s side and reached back to gently rub and squeeze her gorgeous ass. 

“Did I really break your heart a little?” the brunette’s voice was small and quiet and she was afraid of the answer she might get.

“No baby, it was my own fault for not doing more about it myself. I knew I was in love with you and I just waited for you and Sarah to end instead of fighting for you. That’s all on me.”

“It was so scary though, the thought of messing up our friendship if this” she nodded between them, knowingly, “didn’t work out.”

“Thank God it did” Ashlyn brought their lips together in a slow, meaningful kiss.

“Amen to that” Ali breathed out after the long kiss, “and hallelujah.”

//

Eight days later, Ashlyn moved nervously around the master bedroom, checking the time every other minute and adding more water to the vase full of flowers on the dressing table. It was the third time she had poured another cup in between the stems and the water finally spilled out onto the top of the table. The keeper cursed softly under her breath as she mopped up the mess with a handful of toilet paper. She dried off the edge of the card that had been leaning up against the base of the vase and shook her head in frustration. 

“Hellooo” she finally heard Ali’s voice call out faintly from the mudroom downstairs.

Ashlyn raced down the backstairs and jogged through the kitchen just as her wife walked back into the mudroom with a frown on her face after finding the front living room empty. The keeper’s face jumped into a broad smile as soon as she saw her beautiful brunette.

“Hi sugarplum” she greeted Ali with a soft kiss and then helped her out of her coat.

“Hey babe” she hummed into the kiss and smiled at her helpful wife. She watched Ashlyn hang her coat up for her and then come back to take her low heels off for her, lightly rubbing her calves as she did so. “What’s all this about?” she asked as she stepped out of her shoes, using Ashlyn’s strong back for balance. “And why is it so quiet in here? Did you finally just bind and gag them all or what?”

“Ha, you wish” the keeper laughed.

“Just a little bit” Ali giggled as she let the blonde lead her by the hand through the kitchen. “What smells so good? Ooooh, what’s in the crock pot? I’m starving.”

“I made beef stew...”

“Yes!” Ali fist pumped with her free hand as they started up the backstairs.

Ashlyn still wasn’t a very good cook, but she had learned how to make six or seven things pretty well. She even figured out a beef stew recipe that was amazing and surprisingly easy in the crock pot. The keeper had a lot of excellent cooks to learn from and she took advantage of the obvious ones – Deb and Carol, as well as the more surprising ones – Dom and Niki. 

“Seriously, where are the kids?” the brunette asked a little nervously. “Did you forget to pick them up from daycare...”

“Baby” Ashlyn stopped halfway up the stairs and turned to face her wife. “I know you usually get the little kids so it wouldn’t be shocking if I did forget them today, but I promise you, I didn’t. They’re all next door for another forty minutes or so, and the dogs are in the backyard, and everything is fine...”

“But, why?” Ali’s face scrunched up in confusion as they finished climbing the stairs.

“Because I wanted you to have a few minutes to relax and unwind today” the keeper picked up the glass of wine off her nightstand and handed it to the brunette. “Here.”

“Thank you, but you didn’t have to do...oh those flowers are so gorgeous, oh, and you got me a card?” her voice got higher and higher as her emotions crept up on her. “Ashlyn...” she whispered and pulled her wife into a warm embrace. “I love you so much honey.”

“I love you too sweetheart” the blonde replied, her own voice choked with emotion. “Do you want me to run you a quick bath?” she asked as she pulled back and started to help Ali out of her suit jacket.

“No, thank you” she replied as she switched the wine glass from one hand to the other so Ashlyn could free both her arms from the garment. “But will you sit with me for a few minutes?”

“Of course I will” the keeper smiled adoringly at her beautiful brunette. “What do you want to wear?” she asked as she walked around the foot of the bed and back up to Ali’s closet to hang up the suit jacket.

“You pick, but nothing too tight, please” Ali replied as she took the two steps to the dressing table in the corner by the bathroom and bent over to smell the colorful early Spring flower arrangement. She put her wine glass down and opened the card, tears filling her eyes as she read the sweet words her wife had written inside. “Ashlyn...” she shook her head, emotions getting the best of her.

“It’s all true you know” the keeper spoke softly as she hugged Ali from behind and pressed a warm kiss into her cheek. 

“I don’t feel very brave right now” she whispered as she held onto Ashlyn’s arms across her stomach. “I did for a while, but the closer I got to home the more it started to hit me...”

“That’s why I wanted to give you a few minutes of peace and quiet...”

“Don’t go” she pleaded. “Stay with me.”

“I’d love that Al” she kissed her cheek again.

They spent a few minutes getting the brunette changed into some comfy sweats. Ashlyn even selected one of her Penn State sweatshirts which told Ali that she could basically get away with murder right then. But the brunette wasn’t going to take advantage of her sweet wife’s TLC. She was so moved by her thoughtful keeper. 

Ashlyn settled into the middle of the bed and waited for Ali to come out of the bathroom, nervously picking at her joggers. She felt a strong need to be with her wife but had given her some privacy. She knew she’d want to clean up a little after the transvaginal ultrasound. They had both had them during their pregnancies and the gel they coated the wand or probe with had a tendency to drain out for a little while afterwards.

When Ali emerged a couple of minutes later she looked much more relaxed. She surprised Ashlyn by climbing right up onto her lap and wrapping her arms and legs around her strong keeper’s body. They held each other like that for a few minutes, chins on each other’s shoulders. They could feel their hearts beating in each other’s chests as they pressed their bodies close together. 

“So how are you doing baby?” Ashlyn asked softly as she spread her fingers out wide and slowly ran her hands up and down the brunette’s back. 

“I’m good. Much better now, thanks to you” she turned her head and kissed her keeper’s ear. “I mean it was an ultrasound and some bloodwork” she shrugged as she put her chin back on Ashlyn’s shoulder. “Nothing new. Nothing difficult. Nothing scary. And in a few days we’ll have the results.”

“Except that it is a little scary” the blonde kept her voice steady and calm, surprising herself. “It was the first time you had that done to look for any signs of cancer...that’s scary.”

“Yeah, it is” she nodded and squeezed Ashlyn tighter. “But I’ll be doing this every four months for the rest of my life so I can’t be freaking out every time” she chuckled and then sighed. “I’m trying to think about it as an empowering thing. Instead of just waiting to get sick I’m actively seeking it out. I’m looking for it...”

“You’re hunting it” Ashlyn offered quietly, amazed by her wife’s willpower.

“Right. That’s a good one, I love that” she smiled. “I’m hunting it.”

“Well I meant what I said in the card about you being the bravest, strongest person I’ve ever known. Warrior is the perfect word to describe you” she moved Ali’s hair away from her neck and kissed the soft, warm skin there. “But you don’t have to be brave and strong all the time. I’ll love you no matter what you’re feeling Al...always. And if I can help you when you go hunting you just let me know.”

Ali’s heart swelled as she leaned back to look into her sweet wife’s face. Their eyes met, both sets watery and filled with emotion. They shared one of the deepest, gentlest, slowest and most passionate kisses of their lives. They held each other for several minutes as they caught their breath, just enjoying the feeling of being safe in strong arms. As if either one of them needed a reminder of what was truly important in life, Ali’s first cancer-hunting ultrasound served as another beacon in the darkness. They had learned important lessons after Josie had been born and again after the freak car accident. They had each stared down death and overcome it that year. It had changed them both, forever. Was it a coincidence that Ali’s first ultrasound came less than two weeks after the drama with Sam? It was hard to imagine pre-2021 Ashlyn and Ali working through that recent threat to their marriage so efficiently. They would have had a huge fight and maybe even still have been fighting 8 or 9 days later. But life was too short and they both knew it. It had been shown to them, firsthand. It had been explained to them by the universe. They had learned their lessons and learned them well. Neither of them was willing to waste time fighting about something they had so little control over. And, just in case they needed a refresher course on those lessons, there was a cancer-hunting ultrasound staring them in the face to remind them.

“I love everything you did for me tonight Ash” Ali kissed her lips softly as she cupped her face with both hands. “You’re always so sweet to me and I love it so much” she smiled. “But can we go get our babies now? I really want some little hugs.”

“Sounds good to me.”

//

One of the hidden perks of having your best friends all have babies around the same time was sharing baby clothes. Children grew so fast and wore clothes for such a short time that it was easy to pass them along to the next kid once yours had outgrown them. The three families with babies had been doing it since Drew had been born back in 2019. Noah Cross was the oldest kid in their group, followed roughly two years later by Cassius Dwyer in 2017. The Cross and Dwyer families weren’t as close back in 2017 so the clothes sharing didn’t happen until Sydney brought Ali all of Cash’s baby clothes to use for Drew. Then the adorable little man-like clothes, with several additions, were passed on to Evan Cross, and then back to James Dwyer, then to Dodge Krieger and then, finally, back to Maddox Dwyer. It wasn’t until little Josie Krieger made her debut that pretty little girl’s clothes entered the picture. Ali had loved buying her baby girl a bunch of new clothes and took great pleasure from passing them along to Penny Cross. It had been surprisingly moving to have most of them come back to them for baby Lily fourteen months later. 

With Whitney due to deliver her first baby, a little girl, at the end of March, it was time to go through all of the baby girl clothes in the big old house and get them washed and ready to move to their new home in Arlington. 

“Geez, there are so many clothes!” Whitney’s eyes went wide when Ryan carried the other box in from Ashlyn’s truck that first weekend of February.

“Yeah, well, if you were having a boy there’d be twice as many” the keeper laughed. “I don’t know if that’s better or not” she shook her head. “And, remember, don’t feel like you have to use any of these. There’s a hard, no-harm no-foul rule at play when we do this clothes-swapping thing.”

“Ok, I got it” the lawyer nodded as she continued pulling tiny little dresses and onesies and bathing suits out of the first big box.

“Promise me Whit” Ashlyn challenged her best friend.

“I promise” she rolled her eyes. “Oh my God this is adorable...” she held up a small sundress with a matching, floppy sun hat and beamed at the keeper.

“Ah, we bought that for Josie before we realized she was not going to be the kid that spent a lot of time in the sun...”

“We?” Whitney quirked an eyebrow at Ashlyn.

“Yes, I was with Ali for that shopping trip” she smiled at the memory. “It’s the only reason I can remember it so well” she chuckled. “Most of the clothes kind of blend together unless something’s really special or one of the kids really falls in love with it.”

“Like that shark t-shirt that Drew had to wear, like, every single day for six months in a row?”

“Exactly like that” Ashlyn nodded and grinned. “Funny that one wore out before we had a chance to pass it along.”

They sat together for a while and unpacked the two boxes, carefully putting things into piles. Ryan had said goodbye on his way to the gym for one of his private training sessions. The condo was comfortable and cozy and Ashlyn recognized the tell-tale signs of nesting that were everywhere. She had taken Ali’s advice back in December and started telling Whitney some of her own, personal stories about the unattractive side of late-stage pregnancy. At first the lawyer was confused about her bestie taking every chance she got to go back in time and talk about how swollen her feet had gotten or how many times she had to get up at night to pee. Then, after it happened for the third straight time they had gotten together, she figured it out. It had been about a month now of Whitney opening up about the less delicate side of carrying a child inside you for seven and now eight months, and they were both enjoying their new-found level of friendship.

“So Ryan’s been good about everything?”

“Yeah, he’s so sweet to me Ash” Whitney blushed. “I keep thinking I’m going to freak him out but he’s always strong and steady. Yesterday I had to have him move his car because I couldn’t fit between it and my driver’s side door” she rolled her eyes. “He didn’t even laugh at me, or the ridiculous situation” she giggled. “Maybe he’s freaking out and just hiding it really well, I don’t know” she shrugged. “But he’s been awesome.”

“That’s good” the keeper smiled. “I’m not surprised though. You’ve got yourself one of the good ones, for sure.”

“Yes I do. And I’ve got a pretty great bestie too” she winked at Ashlyn. “She comes over and helps me with all kinds of stuff.”

“Oh yeah, sounds awesome” the keeper grinned.

“She is. She even gets me talking about the gross stuff that isn’t always easy to share with just anybody” she patted her best friend’s leg, next to her on the couch. “Thanks Ash. It means more to me than I can probably ever explain...” she stopped when her voice caught in her throat.

“Anytime Whit, anytime” she put her hand on top of the lawyer’s and squeezed it. “Sometimes girl stuff is just better to talk about with girls. Nothing against boys or anything” she teased.

They hung out and watched a soccer game on tv while playing with their phones and actually both replying to some different work emails, even though it was Sunday afternoon. After about an hour the topic of conversation changed to the situation with Sam and Ali. The keeper had told her best friend all about what had happened that Saturday afternoon in the kitchen, as well as all the backstory and build-up to it. It had been two weeks since that fateful Saturday afternoon and, for the most part, neither Ashlyn or Ali talked much about it anymore. They had decided to keep it to themselves and not tell any of their friends about it. Of course, that was beside Sydney and Whitney. They had to work through everything with their best friends, but it was only under the condition that they both treat Sam the way they always had before.

“So how’s the Sam situation going?” the lawyer finally asked, knowing Ashlyn wasn’t going to bring it up herself.

“Oh, you know, it’s ok” Ashlyn answered honestly as she thought about it. “I don’t know...Ali had her first ultrasound and blood test this week and it really helped keep everything in perspective, you know?”

“Oh shit Ash, I forgot all about that” Whitney sat up and turned to face her friend on the couch, reaching her hand out and letting Ashlyn take it in her own. “How’d it go?”

“We don’t have the results back yet. Maybe Monday or Tuesday. It’ll be a week on Tuesday so definitely by then, according to Patty anyway.”

“I thought Ali had an oncologist for this stuff?”

“She did, but this maintenance stuff is just done at the hospital as an outpatient and it’s all done through her primary care physician. That’s Patty. She won’t need an oncologist unless she actually gets cancer or if they come up with a new test for her to try or something like that” she explained with a shrug.

“How are you doing?” the lawyer rubbed her best friend’s shoulder and watched the side of her face as Ashlyn’s eyes tried to focus on the tv. “You ok?”

“Yeah” Ashlyn smiled weakly and glanced at Whitney sitting next to her. “I’m good as long as she’s good. And she says she’s good.” She paused as they both watched the replays of a golazo that had just been scored. “It’s more of a mindfuck than anything else” she continued. “She’s perfectly healthy, as far as we know...fuck that. As far as we know. It’s such bullshit.”

Whitney saw the anger and fear flash across the keeper’s face and gave her shoulder another squeeze.

“And she’ll get the next one in three months?”

“Yep, four times a year.”

“Wow, well, it’s great that you can be more in control of things this way, right?”

“That’s exactly what she said” Ashlyn smiled. “She’s not just going to blindly wait for it to happen to her. She’s going to be vigilant and she’s going to hunt for it.”

“Atta girl” Whitney smiled and patted Ashlyn’s leg. “That’s a great way to look at it.”

“So Sam and his fucking tongue don’t amount to shit anymore” she added with some fire behind her words. “Fucking asshole.”

“I still can’t believe that all happened” Whitney shook her head. “I’m sorry I didn’t see it coming. I’m usually good at spotting that kind of stuff.”

“The worst part is I can’t even just hate him...”

“Why the hell not?” Whitney looked at her with surprise. “Ali’s not even my wife and I hate him enough for three people.”

“And that’s why I love you bestie” she chuckled and tried to lighten the mood a little bit.

“So why can’t you hate him?”

“Because I feel terrible for him. He’s living my worst nightmare and I would have done anything to help him, and Ethan” she dropped her eyes to her lap for a minute.

“Except share Ali with him” the lawyer teased lightly and was relieved to get a small smile in return.

“Yeah, that’s not going to happen. No matter how bad I feel that your wife died and your son is having a hard time without her.”

“You know, it’s ok if you do hate him Ash. Nobody would blame you. Even if you only hate him sometimes... it’s ok” Whitney reassured her. “Don’t forget that.”

“Thanks” she smiled again, bigger this time. “Our main goal is to make sure Ethan doesn’t suffer because of it. Other than that, I try not to think much about Sam at all. And, like I said, this week was a terrific reminder of how little that kind of bullshit matters in the big picture.”

“Ok, who are you and what have you done with my best friend?” Whitney joked and they both laughed out loud.

“Did you ever think I would be able to say any of that to you?”

“And actually mean it?” she questioned, her eyebrows both up. “No, not in a million years” she giggled. “But it just goes to show you how much a person can grow and change. I’m really proud of you Ashlyn.”

“Thanks Whit. You’re finally rubbing off on me” she grinned at the lawyer and her dimple popped out. “It took you long enough.”

//

“You’ll get the results Monday I bet” Sydney said as she sat in the nook to breastfeed Maddox. “Will they mail them to you or will Patty call you?”

“I don’t know. My lab results are usually just put in the mail but Patty might call because it was my first one and whatever” Ali replied as she slid the apples and grapes she had just sliced into four different little snack cups for the little kids in the front living room. She had already taken care of Cash and Drew who were playing nearby in the family room. “This waiting sucks though, I can tell you that.”

“Yeah, you’ve never been good at it” the coach chuckled. “But you’ve gotta try not to let it get to you boo. Don’t give it your time or energy. You spend that on what’s important” she nodded wisely.

“I know” Ali sighed. “I know. It’s just hard. I’m hoping it’ll get easier the more I do it. Like, it’ll become a routine and I won’t get so nervous before or anxious after.”

“I’ll bet that’s exactly what will happen” Sydney agreed. “Every time will get better. You’ll see.”

When Ali came back after delivering the snack cups to Josie, James, Dodge and Lily, she and Sydney talked about a bunch of different things for the next half hour. 

“Any news from Sam?” Sydney asked, keeping her voice low so Drew didn’t hear her.

“No” Ali shook her head. “I see him at school when I pick up or drop off but that’s it. And Ash usually does the pick up after school.”

“So do you wave to each other or what? How does it work? Are you allowed to talk to him if you’re next to each other in the pick up line at school?”

“Allowed to talk to him?” Ali quirked her eyebrow sharply at her best friend.

“Yeah, you know, with Ashlyn’s rules...”

“First of all, they’re not Ashlyn’s rules” her words were short and sharp but they weren’t aimed at Sydney, they were just aimed at the situation in general. “We both came up with what we thought would be best for Ethan and Drew to be able to stay friends.”

“So are you allowed to talk to him” the coach giggled, knowing she was pushing her bestie’s buttons.

“Keep it up girl” Ali shot her a look. “Juuuust keep it up.”

“So is that a yes or...?”

“Yes I can talk to him whenever the fuck I want to Sydney Rae!” she whisper yelled. “I just don’t want to. It’s not worth it to me and I don’t want to upset Ashlyn or make her worry about it.” She took a beat and calmed her voice and her temper down. “It was an easy decision to make.”

“Alright, alright, I hear you Alibaba. Damn girl” Sydney replied, surprised by the outburst. “Still a sensitive subject. I get it.”

They sat quietly for a few minutes and then the coach handed 11-month old Maddox to his godmother when he was finished nursing.

“Hi bubs” Ali cooed as she kissed him and then put him over her shoulder to burp him. She rubbed and patted his back as she continued talking to Sydney. “It’s not really that sensitive a subject” she admitted quietly, aware of the little ears playing nearby.

“What do you mean? I thought this was a big fucking deal and you guys had a big fight and talk and all of that...”

“Well that’s just it, we didn’t really fight about it” she shared quietly. “I was mad at her for leaving right after he did, like she always does” she rolled her eyes. “And she was upset that I didn’t tell her about the first kiss at the Holiday concert. But that was pretty much it.”

“What? There was no big huge fight?”

“No” Ali shook her head and met her friend’s eyes. “She was really good about it. I was ready to defend myself and she never really made me feel like I needed to.”

“So what did you guys talk about then? I thought you said you were up late talking...”

“We were. She wanted to know exactly what happened with each kiss so she wouldn’t picture something worse happening in her head. She told me she trusted me and remembered how great she had felt when I trusted her so much with that stupid intern...”

“Oh my God, that tramp!”

“Shhhh...” Ali giggled.

“I never thought about it like that though Als...it’s really the same situation. You both had an unwanted admirer. You knew Ash hadn’t done anything wrong and she knew you didn’t do anything wrong either.” The coach’s face broke into a big grin. “That’s pretty fucking cool when you think about it.”

“It really was” Ali smiled back at her. “I can’t even tell you how awesome it felt to know that she told him that I said nothing was ever going to happen between us and she hadn’t even heard our conversation. She told him that just on faith, knowing that I would say something like that.” She beamed. “It really sucked to go through this, but that silver lining was pretty damned amazing.”

“You guys are so good” Sydney shook her head and smiled. “I’m really happy for you, for both of you. It sure seems like you’ve got this marriage thing figured out.”

“Oh God, don’t jinx us” Ali giggled. “I feel like we’ve screwed up enough times, especially with the communication part, that we’re just getting a lot of practice.” Maddox let a big loud burp out, along with a loud toot immediately after. Ali turned him around and sat him on her lap. “Good boy Maddox” she kissed the top of his head as he squirmed and tried to get down to the floor. “I’ll take him with me into the other room. It’s been too quiet in there” she winked.

“Hey” Sydney grabbed her wrist as the brunette stood up. “I think maybe you guys have been through enough scary situations that you truly know what’s important and what isn’t. And there’s no other way to figure that shit out but the hard way. You guys have done that and I’m really proud of you boo.”

Sydney stood up and gave her bestie a big hug with Maddox tugging on both of their hair, a handful in each fist. For a good, long moment, neither woman cared. Ali knew Sydney was right and was thankful she had a best friend like her to remind her of such things. The fact that Sydney had suffered a terrible loss and gained painful perspective of her own wasn’t lost on the brunette. She held the coach tight and let a few shaky words leave her lips.

“I’m proud of you too” she kissed Sydney’s cheek. “I love you.”


	23. Baby Flanagan

February and March saw some major milestones achieved at the big old house. Josie stopped napping. Meg officially became a teenager. Whitney had her baby. But before all of those things happened, Meg came up for her February vacation as usual and, for the first time ever, was put to work as the official babysitter. Whitney’s baby shower was on Saturday, February 22nd, two days before Meg flew back home to DC. As soon as Drew’s basketball game was over, Ashlyn, Ali and Meg took Drew and Josie home and fed them lunch. Ken and Vicki took the twins home to Ipswich with them right from the game so they could eat and take their afternoon naps. Both Dodge and Lily were excited about their sleepover at Grandpa’s house. Josie was transitioning out of her nap and would be completely done with napping before the end of the month. But that weekend she still needed a little rest after lunch too. Ashlyn had talked Meg through everything a dozen times during the week and Ali had written her a four-page note of instructions, half of which were about what to feed them for dinner and when they could have snacks. They both knew she could do it and they trusted her. They just wanted to make her as comfortable as possible, for her own peace of mind. 

The baby shower started at 3pm at Niki and Molly’s house in Arlington so the Kriegers had to hustle to make it on time. There was no time for hand-holding the new babysitter.

“Drew should be fine” Ali gave some last-minute instructions as she slipped her heels on and shrugged into her coat. “If he starts to drive you crazy you can let him play his video game, but try and leave that for a last resort. Josie might sleep for an hour, maybe a little less. She still needs help wiping her bum after using the potty. Sorry kiddo” she made an eek face at the almost-teenager. “We’ll make it up to you, I promise” she smiled and squeezed Meg’s arm one last time before turning towards the mudroom door. “Oh, and make sure they both wear coats and hats and mittens if you go into the backyard. And just stay in the yard ok? No walks anyplace else. Not today...”

“Honey, come on, we’re going to be late” Ashlyn said from the other side of the mudroom door after Ali opened it. She had been waiting in the truck but decided she needed to physically get her wife out of the house. She put her hand on Ali’s lower back and guided her out the door with a wink to Meg. “Just relax and try and have fun. You’re the boss. Text me if you have any questions at all. Ok?” she lingered just a second waiting for a reply.

“Ok” Meg grinned. “I will.”

“We’ll be home by 7pm” the keeper waved as she pulled the door closed behind her. “Have fun!” she shouted from the step to the driveway.

Ashlyn had organized and thrown the shower, with lots of help from Niki. Both Ali and Molly had given plenty of advice but, for the most part, had let their wives handle it. The phone call from Tammye was what had scared the keeper more than anything. She reminded her daughter that Whitney’s parents and in-laws were coming and to keep them in mind when planning everything out. The shower was for Whitney, but Tammye encouraged Ashlyn to make sure her best friend would be happy and comfortable with everything from their point of view too.

“Just don’t make poor Whit have to worry about what they’re thinking or doing or not doing” Tammye had said.

Truthfully, Ashlyn hadn’t even considered anybody but Whitney. It was a more traditional, ladies only shower because that’s what the lawyer wanted. Ryan was in charge of his father and Whitney’s dad for the afternoon and had plans to take them to a Bruins hockey game in Boston. The non-traditional aspect of the shower was the sequence of events. The keeper and Whitney used to complain about how silly it was not to open the gifts right away whenever they attended baby showers or bridal showers. It was everybody’s favorite part so why not just get right to it? So that’s what they did for the lawyer’s baby shower and Whitney loved it. There were so many confused looks from Ryan’s side of the family that she finally had to explain the backstory. They opened gifts and Ashlyn diligently sat at her bestie’s side and wrote down what each person had given her. 

“Who knew she could be so damned ‘showery’?” Kristie Mewis leaned over and whispered to Ali halfway through the gift openings. “What have you done to our keeper?” she teased.

“Oh please” Ali laughed softly and rolled her eyes. “She was born that way. She just doesn’t let too many people know about it. It’s the same part of her that’s so great with kids. There’s a freaking domestic goddess in her that I had absolutely nothing to do with.”

Niki handled the caterers when they arrived, perfectly scheduled after the presents were all done and everybody was refreshing their drinks and using the bathroom. Whitney looked completely relaxed and at ease. The smile never left her face and she never had to get up for any reason other than to use the bathroom. Ashlyn and Niki waited on her hand and foot. Whitney didn’t want to make her guests play a lot of silly party games but her friends knew she’d regret not doing something. They chose a few activities that people could do if they chose to, like writing notes on diapers. Niki’s family had done that one before and both she and Molly loved it. In one of the bedrooms, Niki set up a table with several different colored sharpie markers and an enormous box of diapers next to it. Whenever anyone wanted to, they could go in and write a note on one or a bunch of diapers. The intention was for Whitney or Ryan to see the funny or heartfelt or encouraging note when they got up, frustrated and exhausted, in the middle of the night to change the baby. It was simple and cute and very popular. People were writing notes on multiple diapers and they ended up using the entire box.

Ashlyn’s idea was similar but much more artistic. Participation was also optional but everyone wanted to do it. The keeper had made a poster board with all 26 letters of the alphabet on it. She set it up with three big boxes of crayons and a stack of plain white paper in front of it. A guest would take one of the 8-1/2 x 11” pieces of paper and cross off a letter of the alphabet on the poster board, letting everyone else know that it had been used. Then they drew a picture that started with that letter and, if they wanted, wrote a simple or short note to go along with it. You could be as creative as you wanted and there was no penalty for lack of talent. Ashlyn made sure everybody was encouraged to join in. After the shower, she was going to laminate all the pages and get them bound so Whitney and Ryan would have a homemade alphabet book for their new baby girl. Whitney was so moved by the idea that she teared up.

It was the off-season for the NWSL so many of Whitney’s friends and former teammates could attend. They all jumped at the chance to get together when somebody scheduled a gathering before or after the season. There were several Tarheels there and Meghan Klingenberg had convinced Ashlyn and Niki that they had to play a couple of actual dumb baby shower games. But she had one that was funny and would spice things up a bit. So they made little bingo cards with words from Whitney’s pregnancy. They were foods she craved, her due date, some name ideas, some of the symptoms that she suffered from (but nothing too inappropriate or personal), and other things like that. Then they played a big game of bingo using those personalized cards. It was silly but sweet because it was all about Whitney and her baby.

But the spicy game was called ‘Labor or Porn?’ and everybody gasped when they received their first game sheet of paper. It was just another 8-1/2 x 11” piece of paper but there were 16 different pictures printed on it, in a 4 x 4 grid. Each one depicted a woman in the throes of ecstasy or excruciating pain and you had to decide if it was the face of a woman in labor or the face of a woman from a porn video. There were five rounds and five different game sheets. Whoever got the most correct answers won a prize. It turned out to be one of the most hysterical things any of them had ever done at any kind of shower and the whole group was howling with laughter after about ten minutes.

As things were winding down Whitney found herself sitting with Molly, Sydney and Ali as the other guests made sure they had done their alphabet sheets and written on enough diapers before getting ready to say goodbye to the mother-to-be.

“So this was really fun” Sydney laughed and put her arm around Whitney’s shoulder as they sat on the couch.

“Don’t sound so surprised” Molly poked her in the ribs and gave her a mock dirty look.

“Yeah, I resent your insinuation” Ali chimed in.

“What?” Sydney laughed even louder.

“Alright, alright” Whitney chuckled and started to keep the peace. “I admit, I expected...less than all of this...”

“See?” Sydney giggled gleefully. “I’m not the only one.”

“I’m not saying I thought we’d be eating pizza and watching soccer on the television, but...” the mom-to-be continued.

“Ye of little faith” Molly shook her head and shared a wounded look with Ali.

“You guys are the worst” the brunette teased Whitney and Sydney.

“In our defense”, Whitney began diplomatically, “this shower does have you guys” she looked directly at Molly and Ali, “written all over it. Well, except for the ‘Labor or Porn?’ game” she laughed.

“We didn’t do anything” Molly shook her head and looked at Ali.

“Nope. Nothing” the brunette concurred.

“Really?” Whitney’s eyes went wide. “Wow. I mean, I would have been fine with whatever they came up with but this was awesome. It was fun and creative and relaxed...”

“And the food was delicious” Sydney chimed in.

“Our girls have many different talents” Ali giggled and high-fived Molly.

“I’m hoping they have the talent to magically transport all of these gifts to our condo” Whitney chuckled. “Is that in their bag of tricks?”

“I do believe they have that covered too” Molly grinned.

It was just after 6pm when Ashlyn and Ali pulled away from the Flanagan’s condo after bringing all of the gifts over from the Cross household. Neither of them had received any texts or calls from Meg in the past four hours which made them both happy and a little nervous. Ken had checked in with a couple of cute pictures of the twins after they had woken up from their naps and then another one from dinner just a little while ago. As soon as she put her seatbelt on, Ali called the house. If things were on schedule, Meg should just be finishing up feeding the kids dinner. That was a big if though.

“No answer” she looked at Ashlyn who was driving.

“Did you call her cell or the house?”

“The house” Ali replied as she found Meg’s cell phone number and pushed the call button.

Meg didn’t answer and the moms had a fairly tense drive back up to Gloucester. There were lots of potential reasons Meg didn’t answer and most of them were perfectly harmless and reasonable. Both Ali and Ashlyn knew that and told each other the same thing as they sat quietly in the truck. They did their best to make idle conversation about the shower and Whitney’s mother-in-law and how great it had been to see so many old teammates and friends. Ashlyn was going to spend the next day with them, starting with brunch near Kristie Mewis’ condo in Boston. Ali’s friend Erica was going to bring her baby up to the big old house and spend some time with Ali and Sydney and all of their kids. They had been trying to check in more with their friend about her marriage troubles since they had first talked about them last summer at Carm and Kacey’s wedding. Ali and Ashlyn made it for about forty-minutes before the blonde finally started to lose her cool.

“What if something happened and she’s not answering because she’s at the hospital with them...”

“Babe, come on now” Ali tried to be strong for both of them but her voice was strained and nervous as she reached over to pat her wife’s leg.

They were on the highway with about fifteen minutes left in the drive and Ashlyn grabbed Ali’s hand and squeezed it, hard. They got off the highway and started navigating through the side streets, both of them wishing they didn’t live so far from the beaten track. The big old house was about as far into Gloucester as you could get.

“What if Josie woke up and was all stuffed up and fussy and had trouble breathing?” the keeper let her imagination take off again. “I didn’t show Meg the freezer trick, did you?”

“No” Ali swallowed hard as she thought about the all-too-familiar scenario. “But she’s seen us do it a hundred times...”

The fact was that there were dozens of little things that could have happened with either Drew or Josie that Meg probably wouldn’t know how to handle. Most of the time Ali and Ashlyn didn’t know how to handle them until they happened, and even then it wasn’t always the best way to handle it. The most recent, glaring example had been Lily’s lip. Ali had no warning or inclination that Josie was going to reach over and clock her little sister like that. In hindsight, Josie had just woken up from her nap and was fussy and cranky which, honestly, happened about 50% of the time with any of the kids who still napped. And when the brunette had initially turned her attention to Josie to find out what the hell she had been thinking, she had been horrified to see blood gushing out of little Lily’s screaming mouth a few seconds later when she tried to soothe and comfort her. Ali had been a mom, and a pretty battle-tested one, for almost six years and she had never experienced anything quite as scary as that. And it had happened right on her lap! Maybe they had made a terrible mistake leaving Meg alone with Drew and Josie. Ashlyn squeezed her hand harder as they made the final eight minutes of the drive in about five. Ali didn’t say a word about the speeding. They pulled into the driveway and the keeper opened her door before the truck had even settled into park. She glanced quickly at Ali.

“Just go!” the brunette shooed her out of the truck and then reached over to shut off the ignition before gathering both of their phones and Ashlyn’s messenger bag along with her own purse.

The keeper ran to the house, only twenty feet away, and pushed the mudroom door open, barreling inside. Her entrance was so abrupt that Persey jumped off the couch in the front living room and ran barking loudly in her direction. Ashlyn stepped into the front living room, shushing and patting Persey as she went, and quickly scanned her surroundings. She wasn’t sure what she was expecting exactly, but what she saw was a welcome relief.

Meg was stretched out in the corner of the ‘L’ bend couch with Drew tucked under her left arm and Josie sitting up on her other side. Meg had her arm around the little girl’s waist and Josie was playing with her big sister’s hand as they watched The Little Mermaid on the big screen tv. Fred was curled up in front of Josie and Persey had been on the other side of Drew, on the end of the couch closest to the mudroom. The keeper exhaled a breath she didn’t even realize she had been holding. It was 7:05pm and all was well. 

“Hey guys” Ashlyn said softly, not wanting to disturb any of the peace in the room. She looked quickly at Meg’s face as she sat down on the couch next to Drew, but it seemed calm and content. “Everything go ok?”

“Ashlyn” Ali’s anxious voice came from the mudroom door before Meg could answer her.

Meg gave Ashlyn a questioning look and the keeper rolled her eyes and made it seem like Ali had been the only nervous one.

“In here honey” she called quietly over her shoulder as she got up to go back and take her wet shoes off in the mudroom like she was supposed to do as soon as she had come through the door. She met Ali, panicked now by the extra minute of not knowing, with a smile and a reassuring squeeze on both arms. “Everything’s fine.”

“Oh thank God” the brunette breathed out and rested her head heavily against Ashlyn’s shoulder.

Apparently Meg hadn’t heard the house phone ring because the ringer was set to low and it was all the way in the kitchen. Her cell phone was charging on the desk in the mudroom and she hadn’t heard that either. The only trouble had been dinner, of course. Drew was his usual difficult eater and the poor girl had tried to make him three different things before finally settling on a bowl of breakfast cereal. They had watched a Drew movie before dinner and they were now watching a Josie movie after dinner. They had already told her not to bother with baths so there was nothing left to do but relax and then put them to bed around 8pm. Meg didn’t feed the dogs but neither Ashlyn nor Ali could remember asking her to. The keeper got up and took care of that while Ali went into the kitchen and made Drew a peanut butter sandwich. They all cuddled up together on the couch and watched the end of the movie. After Ali and Ashlyn put the kids to bed they found Meg in the kitchen starting to clean up the mess she had made trying to feed them three hours earlier.

“Don’t worry about that Meggie” Ali told her as she came down the backstairs. “I’ll take care of it. You’ve done more than enough and you did a great job” she hugged the girl from behind and kissed the back of her head. She had started a growth spurt and was now an inch taller than the brunette. “Did you get something to eat for yourself?”

“Yeah, kind of” she shrugged and smiled at the affection and praise.

“I mean besides the chicken nuggets Drew wouldn’t eat” Ali chuckled.

“Oh no, don’t tell me that’s what you ate for your dinner?” Ashlyn made a big deal out of it as she came into the kitchen from the mudroom and the front stairs. “That’s no good. What do you want for dinner Megatron? I’ll hook you up.”

Meg smiled at the old nickname that the keeper still used for her and gave her a questioning look.

“Really?”

“How about some chocolate chip pancakes?” Ashlyn grinned.

“Yes please!”

The three spent the next hour in the kitchen in what would become one of Meg’s favorite, and most typical, memories of spending time in the big old house. Ashlyn played some music that they all periodically sang and danced to while Ali got started on the clean-up. Meg moved between the two women, Ashlyn at the stove making pancakes and dancing, and Ali going back and forth between the sink and the refrigerator and the pantry putting things away and cleaning up dishes. They talked about the baby shower and Meg’s afternoon with the kids and how much they wished she had another week of vacation instead of having to fly back to DC the next afternoon. Fred and Persey both relocated so they could be near the people they loved so much, each taking a spot near Ashlyn and hoping for something yummy to hit the floor.

“I love you kid” the keeper hugged and kissed Meg later that night in her third-floor bedroom. “Don’t stay up too late now, your body needs rest. Sleep is a very important part of your athletic performance...” she stopped when she heard the girl saying the same words at the same time and chuckling at her. “Ok, so I guess I say that a lot.”

“You do, but it doesn’t make it wrong” Meg giggled and jumped under the covers. She and Ashlyn smiled at each other for a minute as she got settled and reached for her book. “Thanks for tonight” Meg said sweetly.

“Thank you. And I haven’t forgotten this was a paying gig either. I’ll give you cash tomorrow for your five hours of babysitting” the keeper couldn’t believe how big her little Meggie had gotten. “Tonight was fun. We need to do that more often instead of just watching tv or playing video games. Don’tcha think?”

“Yeah.” 

Her voice got a little heavier and she looked down at the book in her lap for a few seconds. When she lifted her eyes back up she looked like she was going to cry.

“What’s the matter honey?” Ashlyn came back from the open doorway to stand at the foot of the bed, concern filling her face.

“Nothing...” Meg’s voice was soft and she nervously chewed her bottom lip for a few seconds. “Sometimes I wish I lived here all the time” she finally admitted in a rush of words, her voice still quiet and hard to hear.

“Oh Meggie” Ashlyn crawled up the foot of the double bed and knelt near the girl’s feet, putting a hand on top of her shin beneath the covers. “I wish that almost every single day” she replied honestly. “But that’s been my wish ever since I stopped living with you and your mom. It’s a pretty great wish, isn’t it?”

“Yeah” Meg glanced up quickly and then dropped her eyes again.

“Do you want me to tell you what I think about to make me feel better when that wish doesn’t come true?” The girl nodded and scooched lower into the bed, almost as though she was trying to get closer to the blonde by her feet. “I think about how sad your mom would be not to have you with her every day. And I think about how sad you would be not to have all your friends with you every day.” She paused to let that sink in. “And then I think about how happy I am when you are living here with us and that makes me feel so much better.”

“Yeah, me too” she gave Ashlyn a small smile when she lifted her head.

“Is everything ok at home? You and your mom doing ok?”

“Yeah, mostly” she shrugged, not sure what else to say.

“Well, listen, you’re about to turn into a teenager and I’m going to tell you a secret that I didn’t figure out until I was already in college. Are you ready?”

“MmmmHmmmm” she nodded eagerly, eyes both trained on her step-mother.

“Life gets a little complicated sometimes when you’re a teenager. Part of it is all the changes going on inside you and your hormones and all of that stuff. And some of it is just new things that life throws at you that you didn’t even have to think about when you were a little kid...”

“Like what?”

“Oh, all sorts of things, like somebody at school is probably going to ask you to smoke a cigarette with them. Or one of your friends is going to make you feel like a jerk if you don’t go along with some crazy idea they have. Or maybe the boy you like will ask you to do something you don’t want to do and then make you feel bad when you say no. There are lots of things that are going to come up that you’re maybe not going to know exactly how to handle, and that’s totally ok Meg.” She paused and patted her leg reassuringly. “The secret is you’re not alone and you can always talk to a grown up about any of it. Believe it or not, we’ve all been teenagers before and we remember how hard it can be. Sometimes we might be able to help you figure some things out” she shrugged.

“That’s the secret?” Meg seemed disappointed.

“Yep, and it’s a good one. I promise you” she winked at the girl. “Just remember I’m always here for you, no matter what. I’ll always be here for you Meggie, whether it’s in person or over the phone or just with a text. So when something hard comes up you just come talk to me, ok?”

“Ok” she smiled a little brighter and stifled a yawn. “Thanks Ash. Love you too.”

//

March brought with it the usual slew of awesome female birthdays, and Maddox too. His first birthday party was on his actual birthday, Sunday March 2nd. Nobody could believe that it had already been a year since the third, lookalike Dwyer baby had been born. Penny Cross’ third birthday was on March 4th. Meg’s 13th birthday was March 8th. And Tammye’s 62nd birthday was March 23rd. The newest addition to the list of March birthdays arrived on Thursday afternoon, March 27th when Whitney finally gave birth to her baby girl. She was two weeks overdue and the lawyer had been at the office the day before when her water broke. She was uncomfortable as hell but the only thing that kept her mind off of being ready to pop was work. So she went in to the office for a few hours every day, just to keep from going insane. Ali totally understood and encouraged Whitney to do whatever the hell she needed to do. They were surrounded by some of the best hospitals in the world and the office was only 15-20 minutes away from their condo so everybody agreed it was a safe thing to do. When Ryan worried about her driving, Ali just started having the car service pick her up and drop her back home. Done deal. Wednesday morning had been like any other morning with a very pregnant Whitney Engen Flanagan at the office. She worked at her desk and made frequent trips to the bathroom across the hall from her office. Ali, or sometimes Ashlyn if she was in the office that day, would order whatever the preggo was craving for lunch and then as soon as they had eaten, Whitney would go back home. On Wednesday she was eating lunch with Ali, sitting around the big table in the executive conference room next to her office. All of a sudden she got a terrified look on her face and stopped chewing the noodles in her mouth.

“You ok Whit?” Ali quirked an eyebrow at her friend and put her chopsticks down. “You look a little pale.”

“Ummmm...” the lawyer swallowed the food in her mouth and looked down at her lap. She shifted in her seat and looked up at Ali with fear in her eyes.

“Holy shit” Ali breathed out. “Your water just broke, didn’t it?”

That’s how the 28 hours of labor began for the lawyer, and when it was all over Thursday at 4:30pm, her big, healthy baby girl was in her arms enjoying that magical skin to skin contact. Whitney’s mom had flown out as soon as she got the call that Wednesday afternoon. She had been ready for the past two weeks to drop everything and fly out for a month. Ashlyn and Niki had taken turns in the waiting room, knowing it wasn’t really necessary but still not wanting to miss the big moment. Ali and Molly and Sydney wanted to be there too, but somebody had to stay home and take care of the kids. They would all get to the hospital to see the proud parents and meet the baby girl over the next couple of days. Ashlyn was the first to greet them. She held her breath as she went into the mother/baby suite and saw her best friend breastfeeding the big, pink baby girl. Ryan was standing next to her with his hand gently petting his wife’s head, his eyes transfixed by the new life in her arms. Ashlyn didn’t want to interrupt the sweet moment and started to back out of the room when Whitney saw her.

“Hey you” she called out in a tired voice. “I can’t believe you’re still here you lunatic” she grinned.

“It would be so easy to just let you think that right now” Ashlyn chuckled as she approached the other side of the bed, winking at Ryan and smiling at her bestie. “Nik and I have been trading off” she admitted. “She’s getting your mom from the airport right now, should be back any minute.”

“Thank you” the lawyer’s voice cracked and tears started to fall down her cheeks as her emotions took over.

“Hey, don’t cry Whit” Ashlyn took her free hand and bent over to kiss her forehead, fighting back tears of her own. Ryan had backed up and into the big comfy chair on his side of the bed to give the two their moment. “You’re gonna make me cry you big crybaby” the keeper squeaked out. They stayed like that and collected themselves for a minute before Ashlyn caught sight of the beautiful newborn. “Oh my God, look at how gorgeous she is” she whispered enthusiastically. “Seriously you guys, she’s absolutely beautiful” she beamed as she looked from Ryan to Whitney and back to the baby.

“Well she is definitely fully cooked” Ryan said with a grin of his own. “Eight pounds, eleven ounces.”

“Yikes, no wonder that took so long” Ashlyn’s eyes went wide. “Were you able to stay natural the whole way?”

“Yes, God help me” Whitney chuckled and winced a little bit.

“Unbelievable” Ashlyn shook her head in admiration. “Unfuckingbelievable.”

“So do you want to meet your goddaughter?” she asked quietly, her eyes trained on Ashlyn’s already smiling face.

“Are you kidding? I thought you were going to stick with family...” 

“Well, we are” Whitney smiled at Ryan and then squeezed her best friend’s hand. “We’ve got a lot of family so we’re doubling up on godparents, I hope you don’t take that the wrong way.”

“You and Ali will be one set and Taylor and his wife are the other godparents” Ryan explained, referencing Whitney’s only sibling, her brother Taylor.

“I’m sorry to not ask you and Al at the same time” Whitney apologized.

“You guys, I’m so...” Ashlyn felt the tears well up again and she looked to the ceiling for a minute to try and keep them from spilling down her cheeks.

“We’ll take that as a yes then” Ryan chuckled and came around the bed to give her a hug.

“Yes, yes, definitely yes” she mumbled into his shoulder and hugged him hard. “Thank you both, what an honor...” she said as she turned back to look at the baby again. “So did you stick with Rebecca?”

“We did, we’ll call her Becca” Whitney grinned and then turned her attention to baby Rebecca who was squawking and fussing. “Does that mean she’s done?” she looked up at her bestie for an answer.

“Usually” the keeper nodded. “Sometimes they just need to be burped and then she might eat again. Do you have the journal...” she looked at the bedside table for the breastfeeding and input/output journal you had to use to record everything that went into and came out of your new baby.

“Yeah, Ryan’s in charge of that right now. I’m so tired I can barely see” Whitney tried to chuckle. 

“Well here, do you want me to try and burp her?” Ashlyn offered hesitantly, not wanting to take away something the new mom might have been looking forward to.

“Yes please” the lawyer gave a small smile. “I’d love that.”

Ashlyn picked up her goddaughter and carefully held her to her chest. She put her big hand onto her back and started to pat it rhythmically while shifting her weight back and forth and cooing into her little head to try and soothe her.

“It’s ok little one...you’re ok baby girl. Shhhhh...”

“Ash, this is Rebecca Meadow Flanagan” Whitney began in the most exhausted voice the keeper had ever heard. “And baby girl, this is one of your godmothers, Ashlyn...” her words were so slow and soft that she didn’t even finish the sentence.

“Did she just...” Ryan’s eyebrows were up in surprise.

“Yes she did” Ashlyn giggled softly. “Just let her rest. If Becca’s still hungry we’ll wake her up” she moved over near Ryan on the other side of the room to let the new mom get some sleep. “So what’s with the Meadow? I love it but I haven’t heard that one before. I thought she wanted to try and incorporate part of her family name in there somewhere?”

“She did” he grinned, loving the confused look on the keeper’s face. “She’s Norwegian and Swedish, mostly, and the word ‘engen’ in Norwegian means ‘meadow’” he grinned again. “Isn’t that the coolest thing?”

“That’s awesome” she returned his grin and added a dimple. “Rebecca Meadow Flanagan with the stealth Engen in there. I love it.”

Little Becca finally burped and then settled right down. Ashlyn cradled her in her arms and before too long the newborn was fast asleep too. An hour later Niki and Kim Engen showed up and met the newest Flanagan. It got a little crowded in the room so Ashlyn and Ryan stepped outside. He had phone calls to make and arrangements to make before he disappeared into the new-daddy vortex for the next four days. Ashlyn had promised herself she was going to have a talk with him about being the partner of a new mom but she really didn’t want to do it. Ryan was great and she wasn’t worried about him not being there for Whitney or doing his share with the new baby. It was the other stuff, the really nitty gritty stuff that she wasn’t sure Whitney had prepared him for. The lawyer had been mortified when Ashlyn had talked to her about it in the first place. It was all the information none of the books tell you about and she needed to know what was coming after the baby did, so Ashlyn just told her. Ashlyn and Ryan were pretty close, but it still felt like something one of his buddies or brothers should do for him. But she was pretty sure Ryan hadn’t had the conversation yet and it was go time. He needed to be ready to help Whitney go to the bathroom and shower and all of those basic things you don’t think about until the love of your life gives birth and her insides get all rearranged. 

“Listen Ryan, I...ummm...ah fuck it” she started awkwardly and closed her eyes. “Has anybody talked to you about...what happens next. You know, the stuff Whitney’s going to need help with?”

“Oh, well, I read the books” he looked as nervous as Ashlyn felt. “I know breastfeeding is hard and it takes a lot of time and I read about postpartum depression and...”

Ashlyn put her hand up to stop him with a gentle smile on her face. He really was a great guy.

“That’s awesome man, great job” she nodded approvingly at him. “That’s all important stuff for sure. You were in the delivery room with her for the whole thing, right?”

“Yeah, and I still can’t believe what I saw her do. I don’t know how you people do that” his eyes were wide.

“I know, right?” she chuckled and patted him on the back as they sat side by side. “The thing is, I don’t know if she’ll ask you for help or not with this stuff. Ali and I are as close as two people can be and she still made me sort of force her to let me help her...”

“Ok, now you’re making me nervous.”

“You should be. I’m about to rock your world, so listen up.”

Ryan learned about all the things a woman’s body needs to help it heal after giving birth and never once made eye contact with his wife’s best friend. That was just fine with Ashlyn because she thought she was going to die of embarrassment from having that conversation with him. No eye contact, somehow, was better. She didn’t ask him for information about whether or not Whitney had let him help her much during the pregnancy. She knew the lawyer had stretched her comfort zone and asked her husband for assistance as she got bigger and more uncomfortable in the last trimester and that was all she needed to know. But Ashlyn could tell that Ryan was listening intently. He took his phone out and started making notes in it and the keeper almost hugged him. They agreed that he would call her if he had any questions about anything they had discussed or something he hadn’t thought to ask yet. 

“If you really love her you’ll find a way to help her, even if she makes it difficult for you. Remember, she’s just embarrassed and self-conscious. I thought Ali was crazy about how self-conscious she got about her body after she had the babies. But, let me tell you, you can have all the confidence in the world and when your body creates another human being inside it, it changes and shit moves around and it doesn’t really feel like your own body for a long time again. It gets better and it comes back to you and it takes hard work and patience...” she got a little lost and paused to collect her thoughts. “Here’s what I’m trying to say, the most important thing of all, because if you can do just this one thing she’ll be able to do the rest...”

She looked at him for the first time and they locked eyes, his thumbs poised over his phone, waiting to type in the key to everything. “Tell her she’s beautiful, every chance you get.”

He sat back, confused.

“No, I mean it” she pointed at his phone. “Put it in there because it’s so fucking important.”

“But...”

“I know you tell her she’s beautiful. You’re a good guy Ryan” she smiled encouragingly at him. “But this is a whole different thing. She’s not going to feel beautiful for a long time. She’s not going to think any part of her body is beautiful for weeks and probably months. I’m telling you” she shook her head in wonder, “I thought I would be different when it happened to me, but I wasn’t. I needed to hear it more than I ever thought possible. It seems silly or insignificant, but I swear to you...it makes all the difference in the world. Tell her even though it feels like she’s doing ok and she knows she’s beautiful. She’s just faking it for you, and for herself. Tell her. Tell her as often as you can, so she starts to believe it again. If it feels too weird to say it so much then write her a note, put the words in a card for her, or on a napkin or whatever the fuck you can. Just...tell her you think she’s beautiful. And then tell her again.”


	24. Little But Fierce

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut warning at the end of this chapter

Boston Breakers training camp started on March 10th and ended on April 5th. The team Meet and Greet with season ticket holders and VIPs was on Thursday April 10th and then they travelled to Minnesota for the first game of the 2025 season the next morning. Ashlyn was happy the first game was an away game and that realization shook her to her core. How had her internal make-up changed so much in less than four years. She had been playing and living and breathing soccer right up until the car accident in September of 2021. Now soccer wasn’t even the third part of her life that she thought of in the morning. She was relieved that her work with the Breakers, attending events and going to all of the home games in her role as ambassador, wasn’t going to get in the way of the nice family weekend they had planned. Easter Sunday was April 13th and the Boston Marathon was the very next day, April 14th. Ashlyn wanted nothing more than to spend the long, holiday weekend with her loved ones, little though most of them were. Deb and Mike Christopher were up for the weekend and so were Kyle and Nathan. Ali was extra excited because ‘the boys,’ as Deb called Kyle and Nathan, were staying at the big old house with them. It had been a busy few months and the siblings hadn’t seen each other as much as they wanted to. They still texted and talked on the phone but they really started to miss each other if they didn’t physically see one another. 

Kyle was busier, and happier, than he had ever been. He and Nathan were doing great and, for the first time, talking about adopting a child together. Kyle was in demand as a fashion model, a photographer, a hairdresser, an entertainment reporter for Logo TV, a successful blogger and celebrity-endorser, and a filmmaker. He had won an award as one of the up and coming filmmakers to watch for 2025 and he was flattered and overwhelmed. Nobody was happier for him than his little sister. She was always bragging about him to her co-workers and even some of their clients, only the ones she knew personally. It was like watching the happy ending of a really good movie you had waited for two hours to see. Only it was ten times better than that. Kyle had become so successful at all of his endeavors that those closest to him feared the worst. He knew his family worried about his sobriety and he couldn’t blame them or hold it against them for a second. He had given them a million reasons to doubt him back when he was an addict and he hoped they wouldn’t forget it or let him forget it either. Everybody would tell you that the best thing that had ever happened to Kyle was Nathan Kimball. They were as perfect for each other as Ali and Ashlyn were and the brunette loved to tease her brother about it. He had been so sure that he would never have anything close to the love Ali and Ashlyn shared and he had never been shy about saying so to his sister. She felt it was her duty to rub his nose in it now that he had been proven so incredibly wrong.

Nathan was still working as a pharmacist and district pharmacy manager in NYC. He travelled a little bit every other week, but not very far and not for more than a night here and there to check in on some of the far-flung pharmacy locations in his territory. None of that was earth-shattering or new. But what was new was his newfound hobby. It was actually a rediscovered hobby rather than something he had just started new. He was playing piano in gay bars a couple of nights a week, just for fun. He had been encouraged by a bunch of his friends to get up for an open-mike night and it had taken off from there. He had played piano since he was in elementary school but he had never really loved it. He took lessons because his parents made him and then he played trombone in middle school and high school band. He continued to play piano but it was nothing more than some basic standards and Christmas carols for the most part. If there was a piano at a party he could be convinced to play a couple of tunes for the crowd and somebody would come and sing with him. But once he moved to NYC he started to get more into other types of music. He had always loved jazz but never really did anything about it except listen to it and enjoy it and try to get Kyle to go to some jazz clubs with him. One of their neighbors in their building was an older woman, a widow, and she had a beautiful baby grand piano that her husband used to play when he was alive. Nathan had helped her carry some groceries in one day and complimented the beautiful piano and she insisted that he come and play it whenever he wanted. She even gave him a key to her condo, joking that he could give the piano a workout and also be the one to discover her dead body someday before it stunk up the entire building. She had a dry, dark sense of humor like that. So Nathan began to play a lot more piano, just for himself, and it had evolved over the past few years into something more.

It was easy for anybody to see that both Kyle and Nathan were living their best lives. It made perfect sense that they would want to share their love and happiness with a child. There was a child welfare group in NYC that Kyle had done a short documentary about and he had been moved by some of the stories of the kids they helped, as well as the ones they couldn’t help in time. It was heartbreaking. He and Nathan decided they would try to adopt a child who was at risk instead of a newborn or a baby. They didn’t really care how old he or she was. If the child needed a home they were willing to provide one. They started the paperwork procedure to become approved as foster parents. From the research Kyle had done, he learned that the foster system was the best way to find the kids who needed the most help. The bad news was that it could take up to a year to get approved and licensed as foster parents. Kyle and Nathan were both already frustrated by the bureaucracy surrounding the procedure but there was no way to fight it. They just took all the steps they were supposed to take and tried their best to be patient.

The big, busy holiday weekend was wonderful and surprisingly relaxed. Ali and her friends volunteered at the Marathon again and Ashlyn, Deb, Mike, Kyle and Nathan brought the kids in to Boston and met the group for lunch after they were finished at the starting line. Sandi Leroux and Dom joined them with the three Dwyer boys. It was the first time the younger Kriegers had participated in the Marathon festivities and they loved all the excitement. It was also Mike Christopher’s first foray into the special Boston day and he spent a long time later that night trying to explain to his wife how cool he thought it was and how thankful he was to have been included.

There were all sorts of cute and adorable moments at Easter too. For the first time ever, it was at Sydney’s house in Lynnfield and she and Dom and Sandi did a great job making everybody feel at home. It was easily the best easter egg hunt they had ever had, with 7 kids racing around the backyard at full tilt. They had to make a rule about the bigger kids not grabbing all the easy eggs that had been ‘hidden’ with the tiny kids in mind. Ashlyn and Sydney finally just told Cash and Drew not to pick up any eggs that were on the ground at all. They paid attention and honored the new rule. Getting Josie and James to leave some of the easier eggs on the ground had proven to be the real challenge of the day. James had just turned 3 in November and Josie was about to turn 4 in June so they were much more mobile and able to find the hidden treasures than their younger siblings. Maddox had just turned 1 in March and Dodge and Lily would be turning two in May and their easter egg hunt experience was much more frustrating. Kyle and Koty ran around and hid a few extra eggs for the three youngest kids just so they stood a chance. 

Both Koty and Brianna were there and looking ridiculously in love. They were getting married in June and no-one could believe how quickly the date was approaching. Tanner was there too, making a rare appearance at a family holiday gathering that happened to work because the NE Revs were playing at home that weekend. He had just started his second season in the MLS and was looking forward to getting more playing time with the Revs after a pretty good rookie campaign last year. The Revs had been a little wary of the big deal Ali had cooked up at last year’s MLS draft in NYC but, once Tanner settled in and got some actual MLS playing experience under his belt, they realized that he was indeed as good as advertised. Everybody was happy, but no-one more so than Vicki to have her baby boy close to home. Between the Breakers home games and the Revs home games, Ashlyn and Ali spent a ton of time at the stadium. They joked that their kids were going to think it was their second home.

Perhaps the sweetest moment of the whole weekend had been Monday morning. Ali had left the house at the crack of dawn to get to the starting line for her volunteer shift and Ashlyn, Kyle and Nathan spent the morning with all four kids and three dogs. Kyle and Ashlyn had gone upstairs with all the kids to get them dressed for the day after their lazy breakfast while Nathan cleaned up the kitchen. It was close to 9:30am and there was a lull in the quiet first floor of the house as Nathan stepped over the kid and dog-proof gate into the front parlor. He sat at the upright piano, along the interior wall between the front parlor and the front hall, and started to play. Nathan was a decent piano player, but nothing to write home about, and he knew it. He played because he loved it and if he played enough he hoped, one day, he might be better at it. He wasn’t taking any lessons or anything like that – it was just a fun hobby that brought him joy and peace of mind when he put his fingers on the keys. He played part of a jazz song that he had been trying to learn and, after messing it up a few times, he switched over to one of the Broadway show tunes that he knew by heart. He played for fifteen minutes or so, noting that the piano could use a good tuning, and then he noticed a small person breathing heavily a foot behind him.

Somehow, tiny little Josie had gotten over one of the two gates into the room and was now watching her uncle with bated breath and a huge grin on her face. Nathan just assumed that one of the grown-ups had placed her over the gate for him to watch and he just hadn’t heard them.

“Hi sweetie” he smiled at the adorable redhead who was dressed in a combination of Boston Red Sox shirt and Boston Breakers sweatshirt that was perfect for their planned lunch in the city to celebrate the marathon. “Do you want to sit up here with me?” he patted the padded piano bench next to him and slid over to make more room.

Josie nodded her head enthusiastically and sat wide-eyed with her hands in her lap once Nathan lifted her up next to him. He played three more songs and kept an eye on her as he moved through the different styles and tempos and types of music. When he finished he looked at the gate to the front hall by the front door and saw Drew and Lily leaning on it and listening raptly to the sounds coming from the rarely used piano.

“Uh oh, he’s got an audience” Kyle teased from the other gate by the dining room. “We’ll never get him out of here now” he chuckled and stepped into the front parlor.

“Ha ha, very funny” Nathan rolled his eyes. “I didn’t hear you put her in here you know. Next time make sure I know I’m supposed to be watching her...”

“I didn’t put her in here” Kyle replied as he kissed Josie’s head and then his husband’s cheek. “Must have been Ash.”

“More!” Josie clapped her hands and yelled the word out as if she were 2 years old and just learning to talk.

“Well, well, well” Kyle made a surprised face and then grinned. “Nate’s got his first fangirl” he giggled. “What do you say honey?” he quirked his eyebrow at his niece.

“Pleeeeaaaase” she stretched out the word and gave a big smile of her own.

“That’s a good girl” Kyle patted her head. “I’m going to hop in the shower, you ok down here for now?” he asked and nodded at the other two kids who were still watching the scene intently.

“Yep, you know the saying” he winked and then laughed as he started to play another song. “Music soothes the savage beast.”

Later that evening after putting the kids to bed, Ali, Ashlyn, Nathan, Kyle, Deb and Mike Christopher were sitting in the front living room talking about the piano and the kids’ reaction to it and the mystery of how Josie had gotten past the gate.

“I’m telling you, there was no thump or bang or scrape or anything” Nathan explained for the third time. “I just felt her there and when I turned around, there she was like a little ninja.”

They all looked skeptically at each other.

“You guys” Kyle complained as he came to his husband’s defense. “Quit making him feel like he’s losing his mind. Why would he make it up?”

Nathan, feeling very self-conscious and more than a little attacked, excused himself to use the bathroom. It wasn’t lost on anybody that he went upstairs to the second-floor bathroom instead of just using the one in the first-floor hall like they all usually did.

“I hope you’re happy” Kyle snapped. “What’s the matter with you guys?”

“It’s just not very likely that Josie could have managed to climb up one side of the gate and then down the other side” Ashlyn explained softly, feeling bad that Nathan had been upset by their inquisition and subsequent dismissal of his story. 

“Certainly not without falling” Ali added. “And that would have made her cry...”

“Is Nate really upset?” Deb asked softly.

“I don’t know” Kyle sighed and levelled his sister with the sternest look of all because she had been the most dismissive. “All I know is he thought it was a super cute story about he and Josie bonding over the piano and music and you all made him feel like an idiot.” He stopped but then started again when a flash of anger hit him. “And you’re basically calling him a liar. I didn’t put her in there and Ash didn’t put her in there and he says he didn’t lift her over the gate either. So you tell me how she got there” he stared hard at his sister on the other side of the couch.

“Whoa, relax” Ashlyn spoke up before her wife could fire back. “He’s right. Why are we accepting my story and Kyle’s story but not Nate’s?”

“Well he didn’t actually see her climb the gate...” Ali began, her tone more than a little snippy.

“Why does that mean it didn’t happen?” Kyle snapped back.

“Come on Ky” the brunette rolled her eyes and gave him an exasperated look. “You know how small she is. Drew can barely climb over the gates.”

“I can’t believe you just said that” he shook his head in amazement and frowned at his sister. “You of all people.”

Ali bristled at the look of disappointment on his face and looked at him hard.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Are we really fighting over this?” Deb asked and looked around the room like someone was playing a joke on all of them. “Really?”

“All your life you were the smallest. You got cut from a soccer team once because you weren’t big enough and you cried your eyes out for a week” he leaned forward and met his sister’s stare. “Nothing made you try harder to do something than when somebody said you were too small. Now it’s different with your own daughter? Josie’s just going to stay in her lane because her mommy thinks she’s too small to do something else?” he laughed harshly and shook his head. “Did you ever think that maybe she just hasn’t wanted to climb over one of the fucking gates yet? Maybe there was nothing on the other side worth the effort before? Did you ever think of that?”

“Deb’s right you guys, this is crazy” Ashlyn tried to ease the tension in the room. “We’ll just ask her how she did it in the morning, ok? And when Nate comes back we’ll tell him the same thing and make sure he knows we’re not doubting him...”

“No, you’re just doubting your daughter based on her size” Kyle shook his head after one last barb.

Nathan came back a few minutes later and Ashlyn followed through on what she had said and the subject got changed to several other topics before Deb and Mike went home and everyone else went upstairs to bed.

“So what the hell was that all about with your brother?” the keeper asked when they were getting ready for bed that night. “Jesus Christ if looks could kill you’d both be dead right now.”

“Do you think Josie got over that gate by herself?” Ali turned quickly and took an aggressive step towards her wife, getting right in her face near the foot of the bed.

“Honey, what the fuck is wrong with you?” Ashlyn put her hands up to intercept the brunette, or maybe in self-defense, she honestly wasn’t sure. Ali just closed her eyes, frustrated and tired, and let her keeper pull her into a hug. “Yes. I think she did. I don’t know how, but Kyle’s right. If all three of us said we didn’t help her over the gate then she did it herself. We’ll talk to her about it in the morning. Ok?” she kissed the top of her wife’s head and gave her another squeeze.

“Ok” she let her shoulders slump and wrapped her arms around Ashlyn’s waist, enjoying the close contact.

“Why are you so upset about this baby? Tell me what I’m missing, please.”

They hugged for another long couple of minutes before Ali sighed and spoke in a quiet voice.

“I used to hate that more than anything else. Being told I was too small. Kyle’s right. And...and...I just basically did the same thing to my own damned daughter” she said, her voice barely a whisper by the end.

“Is that what this is about?” Ashlyn pulled her head back to try and get a look at her wife’s frustrated face. “You’re always the one who’s reminding me that Josie can do it, whatever it is that I’m about to get up and help her do. You’re awesome about that Al. Is that why you’re so upset? You think you sold her short or something this time?”

“Yes. I did. I completely discounted the possibility that she could climb that gate because of her fucking size Ashlyn. I did what I hated more than anything else my whole childhood. I did what I swore I would never ever do to any of my kids” she shook her head angrily. “The whole rest of the world will do that to her for the next twenty years, probably, at least that long. She shouldn’t have to expect it from me. She should know that I believe in her abilities...that I believe in her strength and her courage and her willpower just as much as I believe in her legs and her arms and her heart...”

Ashlyn was completely taken aback by how upset her wife was about this non-incident. She wasn’t sure how to handle it or even what to say. She took a minute and held Ali as she thought through what the brunette had just said.

“Honey, she does know that. Josie knows that nobody on this earth believes in her more than you do. She might not be able to tell you that with her words, but I promise you, she feels it. She knows it.” The keeper paused but when Ali didn’t say anything else she continued. “You’re always stopping me from doing things for her that she’s perfectly capable of doing herself. Remember when she was moving into her big girl bed and I got scared about the guard rails and everything else that could go wrong for her in the new bed?”

“Yes, vaguely.”

“Well I remember it vividly because you kind of made my head spin. You taught me how important it was to let her do things on her own, even though she’s little and it might take her longer. All I wanted to do was help her and you showed me that if I kept helping her she would never learn to help herself. I was feeling that night kind of what you’re feeling right now, I think. Only yours seems to be a lot worse because you’ve been in her shoes before.”

“What’s that?”

“Like I let her down. Like I was holding her back instead of encouraging her, all based on her size...”

“That’s exactly why I’m so mad at myself” she admitted softly, into Ashlyn’s chest. “I can see it when other people do it to her, even when they mean well. But I still did it myself. I just...can’t believe I did that” she shook her head in utter disbelief. “And then my asshole brother had to call me out on it...”

“In front of everybody no less” Ashlyn teased a little, hoping it wasn’t too soon.

“No shit” Ali chuckled quietly. “Asshole.”

They hugged each other for a few more minutes as the mood lifted and then they went into the bathroom to brush their teeth and wash their faces.

“So what was it in the front parlor that was important enough for her to get past the gate?” Ali wondered aloud, still brushing her teeth and looking at her wife in the big mirror over the double vanity.

“Well, it’s gotta be either Nate or the piano” Ashlyn spit into the sink and then rinsed her mouth. “And I’m hoping for the piano because it lives here with us and Nate doesn’t” she chuckled and was relieved to see her wife grinning into the sink.

The morning and some strong coffee changed the moods of both Ali and Kyle. The brunette got up early and carried two cups of coffee up to the third floor for her brother and his husband. She tapped lightly on the door, not wanting to wake them if they weren’t ready to get up yet. She had just turned to go back down the stairs when she heard the door open behind her. There was sleepy Kyle, in his underwear, with a small loving smile on his face. They had to go downstairs to have their coffee because Ali had brought up a cup for Nathan who took his black. She needed to add milk to it so she could drink it. The two siblings took a couple of minutes before the rest of the house woke up to make their peace, both apologizing for harsh words. 

It wasn’t until towards the end of breakfast, with everybody all around the nook table, even Nathan, that the subject came up again. Ashlyn asked Josie about the piano and felt her heart flutter when she saw how excited the little girl got just talking about it. Nathan took advantage of the opportunity to tell the two moms how important music education could be to children of all ages, but particularly those who were Josie and Drew’s ages. The woman with the baby grand in his building was a retired music teacher and she would talk to him, while he played or between songs, about how powerful music was for the brain. Nathan was pleasantly surprised by how much he remembered from his different conversations with her over the years. 

Kyle and Nathan and Luna were driving back to NYC later that morning but before they left, Ali asked Nathan to go and play another song on the piano. The kids were scattered in different rooms, doing different things and the grown-ups watched from a distance to see what would happen when music from the piano started coming from the front parlor. Sure enough, Ali, Ashlyn and Kyle all watched from the nook table at the back of the family room as little Josie ambled into the dining room and stood at the gate to listen. She stood there for thirty seconds while Nathan played an uptempo tune, before working her little toes into the open spaces of the gate and crawling up and over the gate into the front parlor. She landed on her feet noiselessly, like a cat, her light weight making it easy to stay so quiet. The three observers watched with varying degrees of disbelief, admiration, and pride as the little girl walked up to the edge of the bench and rested her hand on it. When Nathan finished his song he turned to look at her and helped her up onto the bench next to him, just like he had done the day before. He looked down the length of the house, through the dining room and into the family room and nodded at the other grown-ups before starting another song.

“That’s my girl” Ali said softly to nobody but herself.

//

The last Tuesday of April Ali had another transvaginal ultrasound and bloodwork at the hospital near her doctor’s office in Stoneham. It was the second of the year and the brunette hadn’t gotten quite as freaked out about it beforehand this time. She had told Ashlyn not to bother shipping the kids someplace so she could have a few minutes to collect herself. As sweet as it was the first time, and as much as she appreciated her wife’s unending thoughtfulness, she just didn’t feel like it was necessary. Ali would make sure she had her shit together before she came home. Besides, she’d rather save up any babysitting and kid-watching goodwill for a date night or something fun like that. She expected to get her results in the mail four or five days later, just as she had the last time, although Dr. Comello probably wouldn’t call her directly this time like she had done the very first time. She knew Ali was alright and could handle the testing. Patty knew her patient wasn’t going to crumble under the threat of potential adversity – she believed Ali would rise up and fight whatever battle came her way. She also knew she would never bet against Ali Krieger in any situation.

The brunette took a quick lower half shower just to clean herself up and then went downstairs to play with her kids for a half hour before dinnertime. Josie was a little cranky, which happened a couple of times a week now that she had stopped napping, but Ali just pushed her over, lifted up her shirt and covered her whole belly with dozens of kisses and raspberries. Josie was giggling in no time which filled her mother’s heart more than she would ever be able to explain. The little girl who was so sick and miserable as a newborn that she only giggled in her sleep had truly come full circle in so many ways. Sometimes, no matter where they were or what they were doing, if they heard Josie giggle Ali and Ashlyn would lock eyes and blink their joy and relief to one another from across the room. To make her giggle like that was a luxury that neither woman would ever take for granted.

The rest of the evening was blissfully routine. Ashlyn and Drew and Lily got upset about eating dinner but then Ali restored peace and order through some artful negotiating while Dodge and Josie ate almost whatever was in front of them. After baths they all piled onto the couch in the front living room to watch a show together before it was time to brush teeth and go to bed an hour after that. Dogs and moms included on the couch. They read stories together on Ali and Ashlyn’s bed, usually two short books but sometimes three, and then everyone was tucked into their own bed in their own room for the night. Sound machines and nightlights went on and that was that. This was usually all accomplished by 8:30pm, depending on how the reading went. Ali and Ashlyn would then go down and clean up the house for an hour and enjoy another hour or so watching their own show or doing something else that needed doing, like laundry or bills or a dozen other chores that maybe only happened once or twice a week.

Something about that night, the last Tuesday in April, moved the brunette more than usual. She was sure it had something to do with confronting her mortality with the ultrasound and bloodwork earlier that afternoon but it felt like more than that too. There were still lots and lots of times when she would just watch the love of her life moving through a room or talking to one of the kids or playing with the dogs. Ali would still feel those butterflies she had talked about in her wedding vows. They weren’t quite as strong as they had been nine years ago when they first got together, but they were still there and nothing felt better than those butterflies in her stomach. She felt them that night as Ashlyn helped Lily get her pajamas on after her bath. The brunette had finished getting Dodge into his jammies and caught sight of her beautiful wife as she moved into the hallway from Dodge’s room. She should have been going to make sure Josie didn’t need any help but she found her feet planted outside Lily’s open door. Ashlyn spoke sweetly to the girl, her high, soft voice perfect for times like this. The keeper helped Lily put her arms into her sleeves, her shirt up high, and placed three kisses to her naked belly making the little girl laugh as they pulled her shirt down. The look of love on both faces as they grinned at each other made Ali suck in a breath as she watched from the hallway. 

The overwhelming feeling of love for her wife she was experiencing only got stronger as the bedtime routine continued. Every time Ashlyn laughed as she read to their children while they all tucked in around both moms on their big bed, Ali felt her heart flutter again. The keeper caught her staring and cocked her head inquisitively, smiling softly at the brunette who blinked back at her, lovestruck and unable to speak. After all four kids were in bed Ashlyn saw her wife go into their bedroom and followed her, catching up to her by the foot of the bed.

“Hey, everything ok baby?” she asked as she touched her elbow. “You’ve been awful quiet tonight...”

Before Ashlyn could get another word out, the brunette turned to face her and crashed their lips together in a lip-bruising, tooth-banging kiss that almost knocked the keeper over backwards. They stumbled back a step until Ashlyn got her footing, lips never parting, and Ali pressed their bodies together as tightly as possible while they continued to kiss. The brunette came up for a few seconds for a big gasp of air and then moved hungrily back for another deep, passionate kiss, holding the back of Ashlyn’s head to make sure she stayed in place. When they finally broke for air, both of them were gasping to catch their breath as their chests heaved with the effort. Ashlyn’s hands were still working their way around her wife’s back and she pulled Ali into a tight embrace, each woman’s chin over the other’s shoulder still trying to breathe.

“I love you so fucking much Alexandra Krieger...” the blonde began between breaths. “Whatever’s going on...just know that.” She swallowed and took in more air. “Know that I love you more than life itself and I would do anything in the world for you.” She squeezed her, somehow, even tighter. “I love you.”

Ali opened her mouth a few times to try and tell her keeper everything she was feeling, how overwhelmed she was by love for her, but no words came out. Instead, she kissed her again, just as passionately, but slower and more deliberately. The brunette’s tongue taking its’ time and working through every part of the sweetest mouth she had ever known. It was the type of slow, searching kiss that made time stand still and your knees get weak. Ashlyn moaned into Ali’s mouth and got lost in the lips and tongue that were loving her so devoutly. She was sure she was going to have four distinct fingernail marks on the back of her neck where Ali’s hand had been planted since the very first kiss. 

“I need you” the brunette panted out as they broke again for air. “Inside,” more hot breathing against her neck, “now.”

Ashlyn was dazed and it took her a few seconds to hear and understand what her wife had just said to her. But once she did, she didn’t hesitate.

“Don’t move” she instructed as she ran quickly to lock the door to the hallway. 

She was back in Ali’s arms, mouths melded together again, in just a couple of seconds. As they kissed this time, they both fumbled with the others pants as they stood by the bottom corner of the bed, next to the fireplace. They stumbled and lurched from side to side as they tried to get their pants off, all without breaking the deep, penetrating kiss. Finally, Ashlyn worked her wife’s soft jeans down past her hips. She pulled her lips away from Ali’s so she could bend over and pull the jeans and panties all the way down her legs. The brunette stepped out of them, holding onto her keeper’s shoulders for balance while she took in big breaths of air.

“Yours too” she nodded at Ashlyn’s joggers as soon as she stood back up.

The keeper was about to suggest that they move to the bed when she stood up the second time, now naked from the waist down, but Ali kissed her again, hard and deep and probing. Ashlyn pulled her close and let her hands wander around to her gorgeous ass, moaning again when she felt the soft, warm skin under her fingertips. She squeezed both cheeks and felt Ali spread her legs a little wider as they wobbled a bit unsteadily. The brunette pulled her wife’s right hand off of her bare ass and moved it to her front, moaning when she felt Ashlyn’s fingers graze the inside of her thigh.

“Fuck me” she mumbled against Ashlyn’s lips and guided her hand between her legs, whining as her keeper’s fingers got closer to where she so desperately wanted them. “Fuck me Ash...please...”

It slowly dawned on the keeper that they weren’t going to be moving to the bed, or anywhere else. Ali wanted her fingers deep inside her right that minute and Ashlyn was more than happy to oblige. They rarely fucked standing up because Ali never trusted her own strong legs to support her when she came. But she sure seemed to know what she wanted right at that moment. The keeper slid her fingers through the abundance of passion that had collected between her wife’s legs. She moaned, loudly, at the warm and wonderful sensation as she spread Ali’s pussy lips apart and teased her entrance.

“Fuck” Ali gasped and squeezed her eyes shut, face still less than an inch away from Ashlyn’s.

“Jesus fucking Christ you’re wet baby...fuck!” Ashlyn husked out, starting to feel a little dizzy from her own swirling desire.

She didn’t waste any more time. She pushed two fingers up into Ali’s hot, pulsing center and groaned as she felt her wet, warm walls all around them. Ashlyn started moving her fingers in and out, slowly at first but then faster as Ali’s body responded quickly to the stimulation. The brunette was moaning and groaning and grunting as she enjoyed Ashlyn’s fingers thrusting faster and farther with every stroke.

“Unnnnhhhh...fuck babe...yesssss...unnnhhhh...”

Ashlyn almost shouted out in surprise when she felt Ali’s fingers push their way into her own core. She was wet and more than ready but was just caught unawares at first.

“Shit, yes Al...oh fuck that’s good...” she groaned out as the brunette picked up her pace.

They were both struggling to keep their feet, each one holding the other up with an arm around their lower back while they pumped inside. They were still wearing their shirts and bras but nothing else seemed to matter but their mouths and their pussies. Ashlyn was slamming the heel of her palm into Ali’s clit with every single thrust and the brunette was about to lose her mind because of the pleasurable feeling. They both moaned and gasped as they worked each other up, kissing sloppily whenever they could. Ali was getting lost in the sensations and was having a hard time thrusting her fingers up into her wife’s center with any sort of rhythm anymore. The sound of her hand slapping against Ali’s soaking wet center was almost enough to make Ashlyn come just from that. God she loved that. What she really wanted more than anything was to throw Ali onto the bed and dive between her legs with her tongue and mouth. She wanted to lick up every drop of passion that was running down her wife’s thighs and then spend the next hour devouring her and making her tremble under her touch.

“Oh God” Ali grunted as the keeper continued to thrust into her most sensitive spots with force and pace. “Fuck...yessssssssss!!!!!” she yelled out as she came hard, doubling over and crashing her forehead down onto Ashlyn’s shoulder harder than either of them really wanted. Ali’s whole body shook as the orgasm raced through her system. “Come with me Ashlyn” she husked out, finding strength and energy from her own orgasm to keep pumping hard and fast into the blonde’s drenched pussy. “Come with me...”

The rasp in her voice and the deep hunger in her dark, hooded eyes as she locked onto Ashlyn’s hazel ones made the keeper’s core twitch. Ali brought her other hand down and quickly started rubbing Ashlyn’s clit while increasing her thrusts. When she bit down on the blonde’s pulse point Ashlyn’s orgasm crashed down on her, nearly knocking her off her feet with its intensity.

“Allllliiiiiiiiii!!!!!” she shouted as her body twitched and shook as she came. 

They clung to one another and did their best to help each other ride out their pleasure. They slowed their thrusting but kept their fingers deep inside silken walls as they panted and gasped for breath. Ashlyn pulled their bodies tight together again with her other hand, still at the small of Ali’s back. Ali nuzzled her head into her wife’s neck and felt her own legs tremble. She moved her hand away from Ashlyn’s sensitive clit and put in on her ass instead, scratching at it with her short nails and loving how soft but strong it was.

“Can we just...stay like this for a few minutes?” she asked softly and pressed a kiss into Ashlyn’s neck as they both struggled to breathe.

“Sounds good to me” Ashlyn chuckled. “Can you stand?”

“Ha, very funny” Ali pinched her ass.

“Ow!” the keeper yelped. “I’m not kidding babe” she panted. “Your legs feel less than stable...” she moved her fingers inside Ali again as they debated.

“Mmmmmmm...” the brunette moaned appreciatively. “God that felt good. Fuck. I wish I could have your fingers inside me all the time...like, literally, all day, every day.”

“That does sound nice” Ashlyn smirked and moved her fingers a little more. “I vote for that too baby...”

Ali moaned again and pulled her fingers out of her keeper’s core, knowing Ashlyn didn’t usually like to have anything inside her after she came. She brought her fingers up to her mouth and licked every drop of juice from them with more moans. Ali kept one hand on her wife’s ass and moved the other up under her shirt to tease her nipples still trapped beneath her bra. All the while enjoying Ashlyn’s fingers still moving slowly inside her.

“God I love you” she breathed out as she started to grind against her keeper’s hand.

“Are you ok Al? You never answered me before” Ashlyn asked as she started to knead her wife’s ass cheek. “Well, not with words anyway” she chuckled and then sucked in a breath when she felt Ali pinch her nipple. “Mmmmmm...fuck...”

“I’m fine, way more than fine now” she replied breathlessly as she started to feel the very beginnings of another orgasm deep down inside her belly. “I just fell more in love with you ever since I got home today...I just love you” she shrugged and moaned into Ashlyn’s neck again. “I love everything about you so much and, I don’t know, sometimes it just knocks me off my feet I guess.”

“That’s one of the sweetest things anybody’s ever said to me baby, thank you” Ashlyn bent her head down and waited for Ali to lift hers up so they could share another kiss. They got lost in it, mouths moving together until their tongues joined in and took it to a whole other level. They were getting breathless and carried away again and Ali kept weaving back and forth while her keeper’s fingers kept moving inside her. “Speaking of knocking you off your feet” Ashlyn chuckled when they pulled apart to breathe, “let’s move to the bed before we fall on our asses.”

“But I don’t want to move, I want us to stay like this...”

“Let’s just move our feet baby, everything else stays where it is” she started to shuffle them the two feet towards Ali’s side of the bed. “See, that wasn’t so bad.”

Ali was well on her way toward round two and she wanted her wife to keep up with her. She reached between them and dragged her fingers through her own wet folds, working around Ashlyn’s hand while she sucked on her neck. She pulled back to look at her keeper’s face and brought her wet fingers up to her lips. She watched Ashlyn’s eyes darken at the scent of Ali’s juices before eagerly sucking them into her mouth.

“Damn woman” she groaned after sucking and licking them clean. “I’m dying to eat you out...I want to taste you so bad...”

The brunette felt another pang in her core when she saw the hunger on her wife’s face. She didn’t think she could be any more turned on than she already had been, but here she was, dripping for her keeper again already. Her voice was low and full of desire when she spoke.

“Show me.”


	25. The Academy Pt. 1

The middle of May started the Krieger kid birthday gauntlet: all four kids’ birthdays within a 5 week period, ending with Josie’s in mid-June. They had planned to have the kids close together age-wise, but hadn’t really put a lot of thought into the actual birthdates. The Dwyers and Crosses had their three kids birthdays much more spread out, starting in March and spanning to November and December respectively. The moms wondered if, at some point when the kids were older, they would rather do one big party for all of them. Whatever the kids wanted, that’s what they would do. Kyle insisted on coming up and interviewing and photographing the kids on their actual birthdays. Ali loved that he was doing it and, even though he wouldn’t tell her what his master plan was, she knew it was going to be cool. The brunette made her birthday cakes, this year shaped like a 2 for the twins, then a 6 for Drew and finally a 4 for Josie. 

The two big changes for Dodge and Lily, now that they were two, were the big kid beds they got for their rooms, and the new molars that they teethed with for a couple of weeks after their birthday. Neither was easy. The teething just sucked and they were painful molars but the kids were old enough now that they knew the pain would go away. It wasn’t quite so traumatic for anybody in the house. The big kid beds were a big adjustment. Dodge had been climbing out of his crib for the past month, not every night, but probably twice a week. He fell once and they thought he broke his arm but it was just a sprained elbow. That had been the final straw. Ali and Ashlyn were trying to wait for Lily to be ready so they could make the big kid bed change at the same time. But they went and got Dodge his bed the very next day after he sprained his elbow. He opted for a combination sports and cars and trucks theme for his bedroom and his bed was a bright blue sports car. Ali took over most of the responsibility for decorating both Dodge and Lily’s rooms because Ashlyn was busy getting the Academy ready for the first summer of campers coming up in mid-June. 

As soon as Lily saw that her twin brother had a big boy bed she had an absolute fit. Even though both her moms had talked with her about getting her own big girl bed. She had said she wasn’t interested in a new bed or redecorating her room and never wavered once – until Dodge’s room was re-done. It was very typical Lily behavior but she was two, what were you going to do? She chose a combination of pink Pepto-Bismol explosion, just like her big sister, and animals. Her bed was a pink Dora the Explorer’s jeep and both her moms loved her choice. Yes it was pink. But it was an explorer’s jeep and not a princess slipper or something like that. They would never have made her feel bad about the princess slipper, hell, they had embraced Josie’s pink princess style bed easily enough. But they couldn’t lie. They were glad they didn’t have to do it again.

The next trick was getting the twins to actually stay in their big kid beds. For the first two weeks they were pretty excited and would get out of bed and leave their bedrooms. Their first stop was the other twin’s door and soon there were two toddlers out of their new beds. Luckily, they weren’t smart enough to be quiet and one of their mothers would come up and put them back into bed right away. After about the third night of getting up and being put right back in, they learned. When Ali and Ashlyn went upstairs to go to bed they got the shock of their life when they saw both bedroom doors open and both beds empty. Thankfully, it only took a quick scan to the end of the hallway to find them curled up at the end of the hall by the front window, their little blankies and favorite stuffed animals right there with them. Ashlyn and Ali were never more grateful for the safety gates that blocked off both sets of stairs. The twins were asleep but it was impossible to tell how long they had been up and out of bed. Neither Drew nor Josie had given them this kind of problem before. They assumed it was because neither of them had had a sibling the same age who was getting their new big kid bed at the same time. It was a long few weeks. Ashlyn started sitting in the hallway in one of the glider rocking chairs as a sentinel until she was sure the twins were asleep in their beds. When one of them would bust out of their bedroom and start to go across the hall to the other’s door, Ashlyn was sitting there to correct them and put them back into bed. More than once, Ali came up and sat with her to keep her company. They usually read or folded laundry but sometimes Ali sat right on her wife’s lap and they made out like teenagers on the couch, listening for their parents to come downstairs.

“Mmmmmmm” the brunette moaned as they came up for air. She sat sideways on Ashlyn’s lap with her right arm around her keeper’s shoulders and her left arm moving slowly across the top of her chest. “Why don’t we do this every night?” she whispered into her wife’s ear and then kissed the soft skin there too.

“What? Sit in the hallway and wait to yell at our children?” Ashlyn teased as she caught her breath and nuzzled her head closer to the brunette. “I wonder?...”

“Oh stop” Ali giggled quietly. “You make it sound like we’re mean old ogres waiting for some cute little kids to come across the bridge and fall into our clutches or something” she slapped Ashlyn’s chest playfully and kissed her cheek.

“First of all, it’s a troll, not an ogre, get it right Krieger” she gave her beautiful brunette a serious look but could only hold it for a second before a dimpled grin broke out in its place.

“Troll, ogre, whatever” Ali rolled her eyes and moved her lips to her wife’s ear again, this time nibbling the lobe before sucking it into her mouth with another quiet moan.

“Second of all, if you keep that up you’re going to fall into my clutches” Ashlyn squeezed Ali’s ass with her left hand and slid her right hand up from the brunette’s knee to her crotch. “And I am definitely going to eat you all up” she turned her head and brought their lips together in another deep kiss.

They were interrupted by Lily’s bedroom door opening slowly. Both women turned their attention to the 12-inch distance between the door and the frame where a curly blonde head started to poke out. Lily looked surprised to see both of her mothers staring at her with stern faces and she ducked back into her room with a giggle. If it wasn’t way past her bedtime and such a potentially serious safety issue it would have been completely adorable.

“Allow me” Ali kissed her wife’s lips once more and then got up off her lap, enjoying the helpful hand the keeper pressed firmly into her ass. “Don’t go away now” she said quietly over her shoulder. “I’m gonna need to hear more about that troll menu when I get back” she winked and smiled.

“Definitely” Ashlyn nodded with her own smirk. “I can’t believe you didn’t know that trolls were strict vagitarians.”

“Ha!” Ali laughed her short, loud, shout of a laugh and clamped both hands over her mouth to muffle it as she turned around to shake her head at her grinning wife. “You’re too much Harris.”

// 

May had always been a busy month for the Kriegers and it always would be. In addition to Drew, Dodge & Lily’s birthdays they had Kyle’s sober date, Mother’s Day, Memorial Day Weekend and both Sydney and Niki’s birthdays to celebrate as well. It was Mental Health Awareness month too, so Ashlyn was busier than usual with the Mental Health Initiative. Niki, Dom and Ashlyn were all turning 40 years old that year and Molly, Sydney and Ali had decided to throw them one, big, birthday party at a time that worked well for everybody. They originally planned to do it during the four-family vacation in August but didn’t want to exclude other friends from the Boston area that wouldn’t be able to drive all the way up to the Lakes region of NH or the coast of Maine for the party. They settled on the Sunday of Labor Day Weekend instead. They gave lots of notice by sending out ‘save the date’ postcards and emails to their friends and family so everybody could plan accordingly. Niki’s actual 40th birthday, May 30th, was celebrated with her family down in Rhode Island on one of the rare times it didn’t fall on Memorial Day Weekend. Dom’s birthday was July 30th and Ashlyn’s was October 19th so their big party wasn’t near any of their actual birthdays, and everyone was fine with that. It was better that way, then it didn’t feel like they were celebrating one of their big days and just lumping the other two into it.

May of 2025 was an absolute whirlwind because, in addition to everything else, it was the final push to get The Academy completed and ready for the first session starting on Sunday, June 22nd. The staffing had to be in place. The kitchen had to be up and running and fully stocked and ready to feed 130 starving soccer girls plus about 40 camp counselors and other staff members for each week. All of the logistics had been painstakingly plotted and planned back in the Fall. Everybody had done their part to secure money from investors, fill the staffing requirements, purchase and stock the supplies for everything they would need for up to 180 participants each week. Sydney, Niki and Cat Whitehill had hand-picked girls from their soccer teams to work for the summer as camp counselors. They had been trained over the winter and certified as official ‘camp counselors’. These high school juniors, usually, already knew how to soccer but they learned how to talk to and deal with and support girls anywhere from age 9 and up. These interns were the key to the whole program and all of the organizers and planners made sure they were the right young women for the job. The camp was going to be set up so there were 10 campers and 2 camp counselors in a cabin. That meant they would need 26 summer interns to work as camp counselors. Luckily, almost everybody on all three coach’s teams wanted to participate. It was an eight-week internship that would have them playing soccer every day, give them most of their weekends off, Fridays and Saturdays anyway, and allow them to interact with, and learn from, some of the best women’s soccer players in the world. Most of the young women were sold at ‘Ashlyn Harris’. They were all local high school kids who had grown up loving soccer and the Breakers so they were psyched to get to hang out with Ashlyn and Whitney for the summer. But when they heard some of the other names of the coaches and visiting coaches that were scheduled to come for a week or two at a time, it was almost a dream come true.

The other staffing had gone smoothly as well. Julie Donaldson, the high school nurse who had her summers off unless she chose to pick up shifts at the hospital or one of the clinics in the area, had signed on for several of the 8-week sessions. She also recruited other nurses for the other shifts and to help cover the weekends as well. The sessions at The Academy started on Sunday mid-morning and finished on Thursday afternoon. So ‘the weekend’ was actually Friday and Saturday. Part of what made filling the staff positions easier was the fact that their daughter could attend the session for free while they worked their shift. So Emma and Mickey Donaldson, 14 and 11 years old respectively, both went to camp for free whenever Julie worked a session. The other nice perk for staff volunteers was that they could bring their other young children too if they wanted. Cat Whitehill’s oldest, 9-year old Amanda, would be spending 5 of the 8 weeks, the most she could do at that age, as a camper, while her two sons, 6-year old Bobby and 3-year old Jeremy, joined them too. There would be staff cabins that were roomier and could accommodate these extra familial guests. And some of the interns watched the kids when their moms were coaching or working. Eventually they wanted to have dedicated childhood education interns to run a small camp childcare program, but for the first few years they would just have to make do with helpful and kind soccer interns keeping the little ones safe and happy. The staff cabins were located a bit farther away from the actual camp cabins and that was on purpose. They wanted to give the coaches and staffers a break but they also wanted to make sure toddlers or babies crying in the night didn’t disturb the sleep of any of the campers.

In addition to the camp counselors and the nurses, The Academy had a strength and conditioning coach, an athletic trainer and four equipment managers for each session. Those were all professional or college level positions, except for the three assistant equipment managers. Three interns helped the official kit boss take care of everything the campers would need to take care of their cleats and other equipment. There were plans for a boot room, as there had been since Ashlyn and Whitney started dreaming about The Academy 20 years earlier. It was going to be an open-air clubhouse, completely covered and protected from the elements, but without real walls so they could take advantage of excellent natural air conditioning. All of the athletes would store their gear there and hang their boots in one of many rows of shorter, interior walls. It was like a maze of boots and it was glorious. There was a building, the pavilion, where all the weights and workout equipment was housed and used. This is where the athletic trainers worked as well as one of the places where indoor yoga was held in case of inclement weather. There were 15 cabins for the campers as well as 10 other staff cabins. In addition to the massive, main building which housed the dining hall and the kitchen and which also functioned as the emergency shelter as well as the indoor campfire location, there was a medical building, an office building, an arts and crafts studio, and a playhouse performance stage that filled out the campground. Right behind the main building, in the middle of the upper camp area, was the Recreation Deck. It was a 4,000 square foot deck with a roof over it where there was a ping pong table, a gaga court, and other games you could play. A couple of storage sheds were positioned nearby for all of the fun equipment campers would use when not playing soccer or sleeping.

These actual buildings were spread out all around the property, tucked into natural breaks in the trees and between large outcroppings of rock. They didn’t call New Hampshire the Granite State for nothing, and this wasn’t soft, pliant farmland. But it was pretty amazing the way the old, forgotten camp had been revitalized. There were two main sections: the upper camp area and the lower lake area. The outdoor spaces were even more impressive than the buildings. Of course there were the soccer fields: a beautiful full-size grass pitch that could also be divided into three smaller fields; a smaller grass field that was lit for nighttime play; and a smaller turf field that was also lit for nighttime play and used if the grass fields were too wet. There was a hardcourt for basketball or soccer-tennis with training walls on each end. The Lake was the show stopper. There were several docks and one big storage building for the canoes and stand-up paddleboards and fishing gear. The campers could take advantage of any and all of those activities in their free time. There were also a dozen different hiking trails of different ability levels that wound through the woods and by the lake. And there was a large, outdoor campfire, down near the lake, which was where the campers finished every night before heading back to their cabins for an hour before lights out. 

On top of all of that, there were the dozens of people needed to run the camp itself. At the very beginning of this endeavor, it became clear to Whitney and Ashlyn that they didn’t want to create this beautiful space and then only use it for 8 or 9 weeks a year. That seemed too wasteful. Part of what the keeper had learned from setting up the Mental Health Initiative was to get somebody who knew what they were doing to run the thing and take care of the everyday requirements, even if you didn’t think you could afford to. The ambitious women worked hard and signed on several different investors for The Academy and, once they decided to keep the camp open full-time, even more investors became interested in the venture. The plan was to form another non-profit organization structured similarly to the MHI. The Stacy Everett Lewis Camp was going to be dedicated to providing at-risk and low-income children, both boys and girls, the opportunity to experience and enjoy the benefits of going to camp. The Academy would pay the camp to use it for 8-10 weeks each summer, just like anybody else who wanted to rent it out. In between those rentals, the camp would welcome the less fortunate kids from the area for free. The plan was to focus on the New England area, at least to begin with. Later, if kids from farther away wanted to come, and could get there, they would be welcome too.

The administrator they hired was a lot like Helen Siegfriedt, the amazing woman who ran the MHI, except she had two decades of experience running youth camps up and down the eastern seaboard of the United States. Jane Sheldrick was as enthusiastic and cheerful as you would expect a youth camp administrator to be. She was a tiny, energetic, 46-year old woman and exactly what Ashlyn, Whitney and Cat Whitehill, the three women who had done the lion’s share of the work and made almost every decision together, were hoping for. Neil Donaldson and his US Fish & Wildlife connections had been very helpful in getting them started in the right direction. If the camp didn’t run efficiently it didn’t matter how meaningful the cause was behind it – it wasn’t going to work. Jane came on board in January and they successfully incorporated as the Stacy Everett Lewis Camp and registered as a non-profit organization with all of the appropriate paperwork filed and commitments fulfilled. With Jane’s help they were able to find more investors and even get an impressive board of directors started. The two biggest names were also the easiest to get: Jonathan Kraft and Mia Hamm. Matt Damon, the actor who had grown up in Cambridge, MA, and was a huge Boston sports fan, often brought his family, full of young daughters, to Red Sox, Celtics, and Patriots games. He was friends with the ‘famous’ Boston people like Mark and Donnie Wahlburg, Ben Affleck, Conan O’Brien, and a dozen others. Matt and his wife Luciana became season ticket holders for all three of the local women’s sports teams in the NWSL, NWHL and WNBA and had been vocal and visible fans for the past several years. There were always pictures of them with their girls at whatever game was being played if the Damon family was in town. Rose Lavelle, still one of the best and most popular players on the USWNT, was Matt’s daughter’s favorite soccer player and the Breakers had arranged a special meeting for the Damon girls and their mom, Luciana, back in the Fall of 2024. Rose’s agent and Ali Krieger were both there as well and, before the end of the friendly meeting and stadium tour, Luciana had signed her two youngest daughters up for The Academy the following summer. As the Academy and the Camp started to take shape, Luciana began to ask more questions and became more involved. She had helped them secure two investors that she and her husband knew and she also gave them a great recommendation for one of the builders they ended up using for the outdoor recreation areas at the Camp. When Ashlyn finally asked her to be on the board of directors Luciana jumped at the chance. She was originally from Argentina and had grown up playing and loving futbol along with everybody else in her entire family. She had, of course, passed down that love of the beautiful game to her daughters.

Along with Jonathan Kraft, Mia Hamm, and Luciana Damon, Ashlyn used her ties with Julian Edelman and Tom Brady to get Gisele Bundchen on the board. Much like Luciana, Gisele had been born and raised in a futbol crazy environment, Brazil, and was thrilled to be involved in what was sure to be a top-tier Soccer Academy for girls, as well as a year-round camp that would make a difference for the kids who needed it the most. Ashlyn, Whitney and Cat rounded out the 7-member board of directors and made quick work of using their new support system to keep the ball rolling towards their big, June 2025 opening.

As soon as the ground thawed, Ali Krieger’s team of builders and contractors and subcontractors descended on the campground to get to work on the physical buildings that needed to be renovated or torn down and rebuilt completely. Ali had called in every favor she still had in the building community from her sales days and rallied her troops under the leadership of her friend and former customer, George. With Sarah’s architectural blueprints and guidance, George and the team of construction professionals set to work with no time to spare. The did what they could at the beginning of April, bringing equipment and materials up to the jobsite and staging things so they could work as fast as possible once the ground thawed around the middle of the month. After that it was literally a race against the clock and the weather to get things built in time. They had a deadline that could not be moved by a single day, Sunday June 18th. That would give everybody else one full week to move everything into the buildings like beds, dressers, lamps, towel racks, and every other thing you would see inside any and all of the differently used structures. As it came down to the wire and it didn’t look like they had a hope of completing everything in time, Jane, Ashlyn, Cat, George, Sarah and Ali put a list together prioritizing what absolutely had to be done first. The campers had to have a place to sleep and a place to eat and bathrooms and a place to play soccer. In that order. So that’s what they focused on. The staff cabins and the arts and crafts studio and all of the extras were put on the back burner until the urgent needs were taken care of and finished. The cabins for the campers were pretty nice. They slept 10 campers and 2 counselors each, with its own bathroom with four toilet stalls, four sinks and four shower stalls in every cabin. There was a small screen porch and deck on each cabin but they were all fitted with wifi and air conditioning and all the basic amenities you would expect from a no-nonsense hotel chain. They weren’t fancy, but the campers wouldn’t exactly be roughing it either. 6 sets of bunk beds were installed in each cabin with open rafter ceilings and big windows. Ali had come through again with a tremendous deal on the windows from her former employer, Steven Dudley. They weren’t free but they were sold to the non-profit at an insanely low price that Ali had never heard of in her entire career at the company.

“I can’t believe you made that deal Ali” Jane looked at the brunette with admiration as they met in her office at Knight-Harris in Cambridge.

Ashlyn, Whitney, Cat and George all exchanged knowing looks from their seats on the couch and comfy chairs in the brunette’s office that mid-April day. Whitney was just starting to make short trips out of the condo and away from her baby and there was no better reason than The Academy. She wasn’t able to go up to the site in NH but she could come to these meetings if they were in her neck of the woods. So the rest of the team made sure they had a meeting at K-H every few weeks to keep the new mom in the loop. Plus, they needed Whitney’s big brain now more than ever. Unfortunately for all of them, it was extremely sleep-deprived and not quite operating at top capacity so close to giving birth.

“Well, Steven knows how to market and promote things and he also, surprisingly, likes a good cause” Ali chuckled modestly. “The donor wall that we’re going to put up at the welcome building will help with everybody we’re trying to solicit and negotiate with. It’s a great idea Cat” she nodded at the coach who had become such an integral part of this whole initiative.

“When we’re done here, let’s go through all the plans and make sure we’ve got the right sizing so I can get the guys started framing” George looked at his ex-window sales rep. “If you don’t mind, of course.”

“God no, I don’t mind at all.” Ali smiled broadly. “It’s fun to do that again. I always loved that part of my job” she shrugged. “Let’s definitely do that. And the buildings that we’re renovating, what are we doing for windows and doors there?”

After a few more questions it was decided that Ali and Sarah would drive up in the next day or two to review exactly what the plan was for the handful of buildings that didn’t have to be completely torn down. Whitney asked some other basic scheduling questions which Ashlyn and Jane answered and then Cat posed the question of the day.

“Jane, I don’t mean to sound...”

“Just ask it Cat” Jane cut her off without a second thought. She was all business, in the friendliest way possible, and they all appreciated it. “We’ve been working together for 3-1/2 months now. I’m not afraid of you” she winked and made everybody laugh.

“Well, none of us know anything about running a full-time camp so we’re completely flying blind here in terms of being able to make sure that’s all covered...”

“I completely understand” the administrator waited for her words to die out before speaking that time. “I can only tell you that I’ve got all the bases covered. I’ve got the staffing list posted on the C-drive” she explained, referring to the drive on the website that they all shared access to for reasons just like this. They could go into the drive and open up Jane’s to do list or her staffing list or Ashlyn’s visiting coaches list or anything else they had all been working on for months. “We can review it together if you’d like. But everything’s there. Staff schedules and hours. Lists of employees and job titles, there’s also a column for other jobs they’re qualified to do in case we get into a pinch some day in the middle of everything and need to find someone fast who can fill in.”

It was such a perfectly Jane Sheldrick answer that they all just sat back and smiled at the organized, efficient, and competent woman. 

“I’d love to go over all of that with you Jane” Whitney spoke up. 

There were camp staffers who actually ran the camp: tended the lake gear and cooked in the kitchen. Then there were groundskeepers who made sure the soccer fields, and everything else, were properly taken care of, and activity coordinators who took campers on hikes and helped them with arts and crafts projects and led them all in the cool songs at the campfire every night. There was a cleaning staff and a maintenance crew. There were so many moving parts that it would make you dizzy if you weren’t really ready for it. And that’s why most of the rest of them had just let Jane handle it. Ali had already done what Whitney was asking about. But the brunette had just reviewed all the lists and schedules herself. She only asked Jane a few questions and then was satisfied that the woman knew exactly what she was doing and could probably do it in her sleep at this point in her career. 

“We can do it at your convenience though,” the lawyer continued, “over the phone if that’s easier. I just want to get my arms around that part of it and that is the part I feel the least sure of, by far. No offense.”

“None taken. I always love it when somebody checks my work. And it’ll be great to have someone else who can step in and be able to take this part over if, you know, something happens and I can’t be there.” She paused and saw the shocked and slightly panicked look on all of the faces staring back at her. “I’m not planning any trips or anything” she laughed at them. “But, just, you know, in case I get struck by lightning or something crazy like that.” 

To say that May and the first three weeks of June were busy would be the understatement of the decade. But, somehow, they managed to get it done. The staff cabins and some of the less important activity buildings were completed on a rolling basis, even after the first session had begun on June 22nd. Nobody cared. Everybody, campers and staffers alike, was just excited to be there. There was a wall, just inside the entrance of the large, main building, where campers left their coats and boots in wet or cold weather. Everybody that volunteered and helped get that camp built that Spring signed that wall. Once all the names were marked permanently in one of the different colored sharpies, George sealed up the wall with a clear coat to secure them for eternity. It was incredible to look at first, the sheer number of names, and then, some of the names themselves. They were from every walk of life. Literally, every part of Ali and Ashlyn’s past lives were accounted for on that wall and it moved both of them tremendously.

“Can you believe we did it?” Ashlyn whispered emotionally as she hugged her wife from behind, both of them exhausted but exhilarated at the same time.

They were standing behind George, two days before the very first campers would walk through the door behind them, watching him apply the protective clear coat to the wall. Everyone else had gone home for the evening and this was the last thing to do. Ali had told her old friend she would do it herself, but George had insisted. 

“I can’t” the brunette chuckled and squeezed her wife’s forearm that was wrapped around her chest. Ashlyn smelled like sawdust and bleach and sweat. “I’m an optimist, but this...she shook her head almost in disbelief, I really can’t believe it.”

There was still work to do and would be for another couple of weeks, but the important stuff, everything necessary for taking care of the campers, had been finished and looked beautiful. They stood there quietly for another minute before Jane came bustling through the big, beautiful wood entry door that welcomed campers to the main building – the showpiece of the whole camp.

“Oh, here you all are” the administrator smiled. “Oh, my” she breathed out and clutched her ever-present iPad to her chest as she took in the wall. “If that isn’t one of the most beautiful sights I have ever seen...” her words drifted off as she got choked up.

“We did it Janey” Ashlyn pulled the woman over to join them in a side hug and squeezed her with her free arm. “And we couldn’t have done any of it without you...” it was the keeper’s turn to get emotional. “Thank you for all your hard work” she squeaked out.

“Alright ladies” George teased as he stood up and stretched his aching back out. “If you’re just going to stand there and cry you’d better just get going home” he winked at Ali who grinned back at him.

“Do you need us to do something?” Jane straightened up and looked at the to-do list on her iPad with a frown. There would always be at least ten things on that list but she was sure they had reached their stopping point for the day. “I thought we were...”

“He’s just busting on us” Ashlyn nudged her and smiled at the builder she had now known for just over ten years. “But he’s right. Let’s all get out of here.”

One of the names on the wall had stood out to both Ali and Ashlyn. Sam Machado had kept every promise of help and guidance he had made back in the Fall. He came up to help whenever he could, as did many other friends and family members. When the Breakers had an off-week at the end of May the whole damned team came up and did whatever they could to help get the place ready. Most of their time had been spent painting the interiors of the cabins and other buildings that had been finished. But some of them kept coming back to help make the bunk beds up and screw the lightbulbs into the lamps. It was a true team effort. Jane had the master to-do list but she always had a printed off sheet hanging just inside the door to the office and welcome building near the parking lot. Anybody that came up to help could easily see what needed to be done. All they had to do was sign in as a volunteer and then go find the point person for the day and tell them the task they were going to undertake. It always moved Ashlyn when she looked at the sign-in sheet because there were names there that she hadn’t seen or thought of in years sometimes. 

Lifetime TV had come up, inspired by Heather O’Reilly, to do a story about the camp and the soccer academy a couple of weeks before it opened. It was terrible timing, but Ashlyn, Whitney, Cat and Jane agreed that they needed to take advantage of the publicity. Everyone but Whitney sat down for an interview, the new mom at home with her 2-month old baby where she should be. Bob Kraft was advertising the hell out of The Academy at both NE Revolution games and Breakers games. And, when the NFL season started at the end of August he would continue to promote it there too. It was unnecessary though, because all 8 sessions of the Academy had been sold out since the beginning of May. And if the organizers hadn’t been so damned busy trying to get the place finished, they would have celebrated that amazing achievement right. They decided to postpone any celebration until the end of the last session and then throw a thank you party for everybody who had helped get the camp ready that Spring. 

“It was good of Sam to come up” Ashlyn broached the subject as they drove home that evening.

“Yeah, I saw his name in the volunteer log four or five different times” Ali added as she glanced over at her wife in the passenger seat. The brunette felt relief when Ashlyn reached over and put her hand on her thigh as they drove. “Are you ok with that?”

“My hand on your thigh?” she smirked and gave Ali’s leg a soft squeeze. “I’d better be after all these years. Although I do prefer a little less shorts” she pulled the brunette’s loose, athletic shorts up with her fingers and then put her hand back down on her bare thigh, “and a lot more skin...”

“Ashlyn” Ali squealed at the contact as goosebumps broke out all over her leg. She covered her keeper’s hand with her own, to keep it still, and was surprised when the blonde held her hand tightly.

“Yeah, I’m ok with it. I really owe him for all his help” Ashlyn looked out the windshield and took a deep breath. “If it wasn’t for him we would have screwed up the kitchen long before Jane came on board. I think he saved us, like, $200,000 worth of appliances and equipment alone, not to mention the time we would have lost re-ordering everything” she shook her head and closed her eyes as they made their way down the small mountain towards the main road. They were both quiet for a couple of minutes, deep in thought and not really sure what to say. “He came and asked me if he could sign the wall or if it would bother me, or you.”

“He did not” Ali turned to look at her keeper’s tired face. “Did he really?”

“He did” she nodded.

“You said yes, I assume, since we both just saw his name...”

“Yes” Ashlyn replied slowly and then leaned over and pulled Ali’s hand to her lips so she could kiss the back of it.

“What’s going on babe?” she asked warily, unable to read her wife’s face or actions at the moment. “Tell me.”

“Oh, I don’t know” Ashlyn sighed. “I just...I really liked him, that fucker. And I’m fucking pissed at him for fucking everything up between us. Fucking asshole. I mean, there are days where I still can’t believe he fucking kissed you like that, three fucking times and it would have been more except you finally slapped him. Fucking idiot.”

“Wow, seven fucks in there” Ali’s eyes went wide. “Why don’t you tell me how you really feel...” she chuckled but squeezed the blonde’s hand, back on her thigh, to make sure she knew she was with her in her outrage.

“Six times” Ashlyn said softly.

Ali was quiet for a minute and replayed the conversation in her head again.

“No, you said ‘fuck’ seven times...”

“Sam drove all the way up here to help six different times in the past six weeks. And that’s not counting the two trips he made just for the kitchen issue, one with you guys and once with me and George.” 

“Oh” Ali replied carefully, not sure why her wife was struggling so hard with this all of a sudden.

“I mean, part of me just wants him out of our lives, forever” she continued, anger flashing across her face momentarily. “But then I think about how much fun we always had when we hung out together. And Drew loves Ethan so much...”

“And Ethan loves Drew too...”

“Right, exactly. It just seems like such a waste of what felt like a really good friendship, for all of us” Ashlyn lamented and looked at her wife for the first time since she had begun talking about Sam Machado.

“I agree with you completely honey” Ali met her eyes for a quick second and smiled softly before focusing on the road again. “But he’s the one who threw that all away Ash, not you and not me. So don’t blame yourself, if that’s what’s going on here.”

“I don’t know” the keeper sighed. “I’m so thankful for his help up here and it reminds me of what a good guy he is, or was, or whatever. I wonder if he’s being nice now as some sort of penance...”

“Oh I don’t think so” Ali shook her head thoughtfully. “The Sam we both thought we knew came up here to help because he wanted to, because he said he would and because it’s a great cause. I honestly don’t think there’s any sort of guilt-induced suffering or payback or anything like that.”

They were quiet for a couple of miles as the main road led them to the highway that would make the drive easier for the next 45 minutes or so. The brunette thought hard about what her wife had said and the way in which she had said it. It almost felt like the keeper was trying to find a way to forgive Sam so they could all be friends again. She knew Ashlyn was capable of moving past certain offenses and she had always been a proponent of giving people a second chance. The blonde had always been so good about Ali’s friendship with Sarah that it gave Ali momentary hope that maybe they could, one day, be friends again with Sam. Ashlyn kept her hand on Ali’s thigh, even after the brunette put both hands on the wheel to help concentrate and stay focused. The keeper moved her thumb lazily across her wife’s soft skin as they drove and thought and wondered. Ashlyn finally spoke, almost ten minutes later.

“I’m glad he signed the wall and I hope he comes up for the party at the end of the last session.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I straight up based The Academy on the Berkshire Soccer Academy for Girls that Mia Hamm, Kristine Lilly and Tisha Venturini run every summer. Check them out at berkshiresocceracademy.com if you're interested. I'm posting some maps and pictures and things on the Tumblr blog too.


	26. The Academy Pt. 2

The grand opening of The Academy, momentous as it was, was not the only social engagement in the month of June. Somehow, the little boy next door who had been 8-years old when Ashlyn moved into the big old house, was graduating high school. Justin Donaldson was part of the Gloucester Fishermen graduating class and the Kriegers were sitting in the audience that warm Sunday afternoon, June 15th, when he received his diploma. He was 17-years old, carefree, and heading to the University of Massachusetts at Amherst, his father’s alma mater, in September. He didn’t really have a plan yet but was hoping to find something, besides basketball and girls, that inspired him once he got to college. He was their first-born child and their only son, but both Neil and Julie Donaldson worried about how the kid was going to take care of himself in 2-1/2 months. They had more faith that both Emma and Mickey, their daughters, could take care of themselves better at their current ages, 14 and 11 respectively, than Justin could.

The first Saturday in June was Koty and Brianna’s wedding out in her home town in Western Massachusetts. Kyle Krieger was tired of driving or taking the train up to Massachusetts by the end of June. He had come up for the twins’ birthday and Drew’s birthday, both separate trips and parties, back in May. Then he came up for Koty’s wedding, which he really didn’t want to do. But he ultimately decided to go to support his step-brother on his big day because he knew that Brianna’s family was not very helpful or considerate when it came to Koty’s sobriety. Then, he would be coming back up for Josie’s birthday party on June 19th. That was a Thursday and Kyle’s birthday was the 17th, two days earlier, so the Kriegers had a big party at the big old house for both the princess and the queen. He and Nathan and Luna stayed through the weekend to help with the kids while Ali and Ashlyn focused on getting all the final details taken care of at The Academy. Ashlyn had hired Kyle to take photographs of the first week of camp and he agreed to do it as long as he could donate his pay right back to The Academy.

“Look at this place Ashlyn” Kyle bumped shoulders with her as the two of them stood in the middle of the upper part of the camp, near the recreation deck. His eyes were wide and his face was one enormous grin as he looked over the camp full of excited young girls who wanted nothing more than to share and expand their love of soccer. “You really did it sis. Not that I didn’t think you could, but, you know...you really fucking did it! We’re standing here at your soccer academy, surrounded by a hundred girls who paid to be here with you. Can you believe it?!” He put his arm around her shoulder and gave her a side hug. “I’m so fucking proud of you.”

“Thanks Ky” Ashlyn leaned her head against his shoulder, overwhelmed by emotions for a minute. “It took so much work from so many people” she paused and lifted her head up again, “I can’t believe it’s really happening.”

“Alex said you have a waiting list that’s, like, another hundred names long. Now that’s how you make a grand debut” he enthused and they were quiet for another minute. “Talk about making your dream come true. I’m just in awe of what you’ve done since you retired.”

“I could say the same thing about you” she elbowed him. “Except you didn’t retire because you’ve never really worked, have you?” she teased and they both laughed.

“I work, what the hell are you talking about?” he laughed some more. “Just because I’ve always worked for myself instead of punching somebody else’s timeclock doesn’t mean I don’t work” he sassed back.

“Whatever” the keeper nudged him again with her shoulder. “The point is, I’m just as proud of you. You went to film school and now you’re, like, winning fancy NYC documentary awards and shit. That’s really impressive” she gave him a sweet, sincere smile. “I remember when we used to watch Hitchcock movies together and you would just roll your eyes...”

“Oh my God, don’t remind me” he dropped his head in embarrassment. “I want to watch them all over again now that I can appreciate them. Hey! Can we watch a couple tonight? Pleeeeaaase?”

“You don’t have to twist my arm” she chuckled. “We haven’t watched a Hitchcock movie in ages. I’d love it. Now quit trying to change the subject and let me finish telling you how awesome I think you are.”

“Well, by all means, you go right ahead” he giggled.

//

For the first time in years, Ashlyn and Hannah disagreed about how Meg wanted to spend her summer. For the past several years she had been staying in the DC area for the first 6 or 7 weeks of summer and then flying up to spend August in Gloucester. She typically attended at least one local soccer camp, one week long, but usually two or three. Then a basketball camp for another week and sometimes two. She was 13 years old that summer and she wanted to come up and spend the five weeks for her age group at The Academy. There was a sixth week that was an invitational camp for girls in grades 6-11 that Ashlyn knew Meg would qualify for too. That would take her right up to the beginning of August.

“So you think she should just spend the entire summer up there?” Hannah asked over the phone, unable to keep the indignation out of her voice.

“No, I didn’t say that...” Ashlyn tried to stay calm on the other end of the phone call back at the end of March.

“Well how else does it work out then? If she goes to the first six sessions at your camp that’s the first six weeks. Then she does her usual August in Gloucester vacation and then she comes home just in time to go to school. I mean, if it’s still ok with you that she goes to school here, you know, where she lives?”

The keeper had learned the hard way not to argue with her ex when she was like this. Nothing ever got accomplished and feelings, on both sides, got hurt. But she had also learned to stick up for herself. She felt like she needed to remind Hannah that she wasn’t even going to be in the country for the last three weeks of July. She had been hired by ESPN to cover the women’s EUROs in Germany that summer and she was excited to actually go to where the big tournament was being played instead of staying behind and sitting at a studio desk in NY or Connecticut somewhere. She had loved being at the Olympics in LA last year and wanted more onsite tournament work. It wasn’t like she would be seeing Meg either during that time in Germany.

“All I said was that it was too bad that Meg would have to miss the August vacation at the lake this summer” Ashlyn clarified, her voice even and steady.

“Yes, but what you meant was ‘why are you being so mean Hannah? Why don’t you just let her stay up here all summer long? You’re so selfish and I love her too’” Hannah snapped.

“Don’t you dare put words in my mouth” the blonde’s retort was quick and strong. “I didn’t say that and I don’t think that so just knock it off. I’m not the one you’re mad at. I don’t know what the hell crawled up your ass Hannah, but it wasn’t me so quit taking it out on me.”

There was a silence that descended between the two of them and all either of them heard for a full minute was the other one breathing. Ashlyn was about to just tell her she’d talk to her later and end the call when she heard her ex’s throaty laugh.

“What’s so funny?” the keeper couldn’t resist asking even though she felt like she was walking into an ambush.

“You never were much of an ass girl, were you?” she chuckled and then began to laugh again.

Ashlyn was surprised by the statement and wasn’t sure how to respond. While she tried to think of what to say, Hannah continued.

“But oh Jesus your fingers” she sucked in a breath as she spoke. “There are times when I still miss those long fingers of yours...”

“Are you drunk?” the keeper asked as carefully and non-confrontationally as she could manage.

“No I’m not drunk” the redhead answered flatly. “I’ve had some wine but I’m not drunk. Why? What’s your point? Don’t worry, I don’t need saving.”

“My point is that maybe we should talk about this tomorrow before you have some wine...”

“Sure, sure, whatever you say Ashlyn. You’re the expert on drunks. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

Hannah ended the call and Ashlyn stared at her phone with her mouth agape. What the fuck was that?

As much as she hated to talk to Ali about Hannah, Ashlyn knew she needed some advice. Normally she would bother Whitney but she was 9-1/2 months pregnant and worrying about getting things done for The Academy.

“Hey, can I um...” 

“What’s up babe?” Ali tilted her head inquisitively as she took her clothes off and put her pajamas on an hour later.

“Well I was talking to Hannah about Meg coming up for The Academy this summer...” she began but immediately got distracted by her wife’s naked body. 

“Annnndddd?” Ali teased her when she noticed what the stoppage in conversation was all about. She pulled her pajama pants up and smirked at her wife who was sitting on the bed, leaning up against the headboard. “Some things never change” she chuckled and pulled her sleep tank over her head as she walked around the foot of the bed to kiss Ashlyn’s lips. “And I hope they never do.”

Ashlyn smiled back at the brunette and took her hands, guiding her to sit in front of her on the bed. She spent several minutes telling Ali what Hannah had said, even deciding to include the comment about Ashlyn’s fingers and disinterest in her ass.

“I knew that bitch was still in there somewhere” Ali shook her head as her jealousy spiked. “She seems all mature and normal but that nutjob who treated you like...”

“Ok, maybe I shouldn’t have told you that part” Ashlyn cut her off, hoping to avoid her second fight in two conversations for the evening.

“I’m glad you told me” Ali got up and sat on her wife’s lap, straddling her and pulling her in for a hug. “It makes me feel a little less crazy, like maybe I’m not losing my mind because I haven’t fallen for the ‘new Hannah’”.

“Honey, she’s been the same for like, the past eight years” Ashlyn chuckled as she leaned back against the headboard again, hands still entwined with Ali’s. “And, for the record, Whit doesn’t buy ‘the act’ as she calls it either.”

“Alright” Ali sighed and pouted a little bit. “Let’s talk this out so we can stop talking about your horrible ex.” She took a couple of deep breaths. “Besides wanting to smack her in the face, the first thing I thought of when you were telling me about your conversation was that she must be really missing Meg right now.”

“Missing her? They live together. I mean, I know it’s a huge house but still...”

“No, not like that, necessarily. But Meg turned 13 this month and she’s officially a teenager and it’s really hard sometimes for moms when their little girls grow up” the brunette cupped her wife’s cheek as they gazed at each other. “Don’t you remember how you felt about your mom when you were 13?”

“Well my situation was a little different than Meg’s...”

“Oh my God I’m so sorry babe” Ali’s eyes flew open wide as soon as she heard the question leave her own lips. “Fuck, I’m an idiot...”

“Hey, it’s ok Al. I know what you meant” she smiled at her distraught wife. “Why don’t you tell me what it was like for you?”

Ali leaned forward and kissed her keeper’s lips sweetly and tenderly, hoping to heal any hurt she had just caused with her thoughtless question. 

“I’m really sorry sweetheart” she whispered against Ashlyn’s cheek as she hugged her. They hugged for another minute and then Ashlyn patted her wife’s butt with both hands to encourage her to continue. “Ok, well, it was a really strange and hard time for both my mom and me, I think. I was getting older and having feelings and trying to figure out how to be a teenager and I didn’t want my mom in all my business. I needed to have more autonomy and more privacy and we started to fight about it.”

“You and Deb Deb fought?” Ashlyn’s mouth dropped open. “I just can’t picture either one of you fighting with each other...”

“Well, then you haven’t been paying attention” Ali giggled. “Anyway, the point is, maybe Meg’s going through the same thing and Hannah’s feeling it. My mom always said that was the hardest time for her to be a parent, you know, except for the drug addiction and the hospital stays” she clarified. “She said that she knew I still needed her but she wasn’t sure I knew that at the time.”

“And if that’s what’s going on with Meg and Hannah, it makes sense that she’s pissed at me for taking her away this summer” Ashlyn exhaled as she thought more about it. “And the wine just made her confident enough to tell me.”

“Yeah, in her own special way” Ali rolled her eyes dramatically. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t do that. I know you’ve both made the effort to keep your relationship good so you can be there for Meg. I’ll behave, I promise.”

“You guys have come so far over the years that I forget how much you used to hate each other” Ashlyn couldn’t help but grin a little as she pulled Ali in for a quick kiss.

“Oh I still don’t like her, I just hide it a lot better now” she winked. 

“And you love Meg so it’s easy to let that guide everything else” Ashlyn added thoughtfully. 

“Does she usually bring up your past?” the brunette asked softly, almost in a whisper, as she moved a hand to play with the short hair at the back of Ashlyn’s neck. She kept her eyes down, not wanting to show her wife how much she cared about the answer.

“Hey” the keeper lifted Ali’s chin with her finger until their eyes met again. “No, she’s never done that before and I’m pretty sure she’s going to be mortified when she realizes what she said” she chuckled softly. “You’ve heard us a million times on the phone baby. It’s always nice and simple, just talking about Meg and what’s going on with her. That’s it. I promise.”

“I know” Ali shook her head, annoyed at herself for her moment of jealous weakness. “You don’t have to promise me anything Ash. I know there’s nothing but Meg between you two. I trust you” she smiled shyly as she looked into her favorite hazel eyes. “She’s the one who makes me nervous” she admitted as she squeezed Ashlyn’s hand in their laps. “But not you, never you.” She pulled her hand up and kissed each of her wife’s knuckles softly and slowly, never dropping her gaze. “Now when you talk to her tomorrow you give her a message from me ok?”

“I’m gonna give that a strong maybe” the keeper replied with a cock of her head.

“You just tell her that these are my fucking fingers now” she opened Ashlyn’s hand and licked up to the tip of her index finger. “And she’s not allowed to even think about them anymore. Understood?”

“Oh I understand” Ashlyn swallowed and then fought back a giggle.

“Why are you laughing at me?” Ali asked with a mixture of anger and hurt in her voice that broke her keeper’s heart.

“No, I’m not laughing at you, beautiful” she shook her head and pressed a soft, sweet kiss to Ali’s lips. “I’m laughing at her” she grinned as she leaned back again. “She has no idea what I liked and didn’t like” she giggled again. “She thinks I’m not an ass girl just because I didn’t like hers.” Ashlyn moved her free hand to her wife’s magnificent ass and began to massage it lightly, letting her long, strong fingers work on the muscled and still nicely-defined derriere. “She would probably pass out if she had any idea how much I love your ass, baby” she gave it a strong squeeze, loving the way Ali’s eyes started to darken at the touch and the sound of her husky voice. “I would do just about anything for your gorgeous ass and don’t you ever forget it.”

The keeper took it as a good sign when Ali crashed their lips together in a deep, passionate kiss.

//

The final decision, after Ashlyn and Hannah talked the next day, was that Meg would come up to Gloucester and go to the first six weeks of camp and then go home to DC for two weeks. Then, if she wanted to, she could come back up for the end of Camp party and go on the four-family vacation with the Kriegers like she usually did. Then she would spend the last week of August and the summer at home with her mom getting ready for 8th grade. Hannah had been quick to apologize for the conversation the night before. She didn’t go into any specifics nor did she mention the inappropriate comments she made to her ex-girlfriend. She just said she was sorry and embarrassed by her behavior and that was that. Ashlyn would have given just about anything to be able to actually deliver her wife’s message to Hannah. But there was no way the blonde was going to rekindle that powder keg. Things had been too good for too long to even entertain the thought, as tantalizing as it was. Ashlyn smirked to herself as she thought back to the steamy night she had enjoyed with her wife and her wife’s ass and just let all the other temptations fall away.

“Listen Han, I don’t want to overstep or anything...” the blonde began hesitantly. “But 13-year old girls are tough and we’ve got one now and I just want you to know that I’m here for you. You know, if you ever need to complain to somebody about Meg but don’t want to come across as a horrible mother who hates her own daughter...”

Hannah’s quiet laughter finally made Ashlyn relax and chuckle along with her. She had been nervous to make the offer, especially after the terrible call the night before, but she managed to work up the courage just as they got ready to end the call.

“Oh Ash, thank you” the redhead giggled. “I needed that. I was feeling like such a jerk because of...last night and you just made my day.”

“Oh so you’re assuming I’m joking?” Ashlyn deadpanned and made her ex laugh again. “I’m totally serious about being here if you need to vent. From what I understand, this is a tough age for mothers and daughters. Who knew there was a hidden benefit to having your own mom not be around much when you were 13 yourself” she chuckled softly and hoped Hannah would just let it go. She really didn’t want to get into anything about her family with her. That bridge had burned a long time ago. “So, just remember I’m here if you need me. That’s all.”

“Thanks Ash. You’re sweet and I appreciate it.”

//

The first session of The Academy had been a big success. As optimistic and well-prepared as they all felt about it, they were still nervous as hell. Jane Sheldrick was a godsend. She just didn’t get ruffled at all. She ran camps for a living – it’s what she did and she did it very well. Ashlyn and Whitney had spoken at length about how anxious they both were about not being there 24/7, especially at the beginning. Jane had assured them that everything was under control and that, really, none of the coaches needed to be there for anything other than the soccer parts of the days. But that wasn’t the kind of camp either woman had envisioned and Ashlyn made the 90-minute drive up and back every day almost the first full three weeks. She wasn’t even an official coach so she was like the flex-player. She filled in wherever she was needed, especially during the first week. If Whitney hadn’t just had her beautiful baby girl she would have been up there every single day as well. This was their dream and they were desperate to make sure that everything went smoothly and that every girl had an incredible 5 days at The Academy. The typical day at The Academy looked like this:

7:30am Wake-up  
8:00am Breakfast  
9:00am Mental Skills Session  
9:30am Soccer Session I  
11:30am Elective I  
12:30pm Lunch  
1:30pm Rest Hour in Cabins  
2:30pm Soccer Session II  
4:00pm Elective II  
5:30pm Dinner  
6:30pm All Camp Evening Activity  
8:00pm Evening Snack  
9:00pm Cabin Time, Showers  
10:00pm Lights Out

The Electives were the free periods where the campers could do whatever they wanted to do, really. They had to sign up for one of the activities like stand-up paddleboarding, canoeing, fishing, hiking, arts and crafts, theater, orienteering, yoga, cooking, dance, outdoor survival, and swimming because there were limited spaces available. But if they didn’t get to go paddleboarding, or whatever, one day they could always go the next day instead. The Evening Activity could be any number of things from a talent show to a cooking competition to a big group hike. But every evening ended the same way, back at the big, outdoor campfire. The staff led them in campfire songs while they enjoyed their evening snack and relaxed before going back to their cabins.

Ashlyn realized quickly that she was spending too much time driving back and forth so she started sleeping at the camp every other night. She didn’t want to be away from home any more than that. The blonde stayed over Sunday and Tuesday nights and then Ali brought the kids up for the day on Thursday so they could see what their mama was up to. Thursday was a short day so the campers could depart in the early afternoon. It was a good, kid-friendly day for everybody and it didn’t take long for the weekly trip to mama’s camp to become a Krieger family summer favorite. The Crosses and Dwyers started to follow suit, joining Cat Whitehill who already had her kids with her full-time while she volunteered at the camp. The visiting coaches often brought their kids too so it was a very family-friendly situation for everyone.

“So what do you think?” Ali asked her father as they stood and watched the last few campers driving away with their parents.

Ken Krieger’s schedule was tough because of his scouting work and he wasn’t going to be able to dedicate a full week of his time to The Academy until the third week. He had driven up the first Thursday to get a look at the real thing with his own eyes and was very impressed.

“This is really something. You ladies should be very very proud of what you’ve done up here. It looked great on paper and in theory but this place...” he looked around, “is incredible.”

“Grandpa!!” Josie yelled as she ran up behind them, wrapping both arms around his leg in a slam hug.

“Yes sweetheart!” he turned and picked her up with a grin.

“Did you see the bob?” she asked breathlessly, turning in his arms to point down towards the lake.

The rest of the family was making their way towards them, having just toured the lake and lower camp area. Dodge launched himself into Ali’s arms with an excited squeal and a huge smile across his face.

“I haven’t seen the...bob” Ken glanced at Ali, a little confused.

“The blob, little one, it’s called the blob” the brunette corrected with a warm chuckle.

“It’s the big, inflatable raft thing that you can jump on and it launches you up in the air” Meg explained excitedly as the rest of the group caught up. “It’s so fun.”

“It sure sounds fun” Ken kissed Josie’s cheek and then reached his arm out and welcomed Meg into a hug. He kissed her on her head. “Hi Meggie, you’re getting so tall. Did you have a good week?”

Ashlyn caught her wife’s eye as they listened to Meg tell Ken all about how cool Mia Hamm, board member and session one’s guest coach, was. Ali smiled at the blonde and winked, trying to tell her that her dad had given it his stamp of approval. Ashlyn squinted just a little bit, distracted by Lily tugging on her hand and trying to pull her over to the recreation deck. Ali blinked at her slowly and then nodded. Her smile changed to her nose-crinkling grin when she saw her keeper’s face break into her own dimpled smile. Ashlyn had told her that the real test, in her mind anyway, was going to be what Ken thought of it. Not just the cabins with the fresh paint or the well-stocked arts and crafts studio, but the beautiful grass pitch and the boot wall and the real soccer stuff. Knowing he approved meant everything to Ashlyn and she suddenly felt like she was going to cry tears of joy and relief. She turned around and let Lily lead her away, thankful no-one had seen her lose her cool. 

It was about 40 minutes later and all of the kids had started their own, impromptu soccer game while the grown-ups chatted and watched to make sure that Noah and Cash didn’t bowl over the younger kids too much. It could have been any four-family gathering, minus the Flanagans, with all eleven kids running around trying to play with each other. Meg was big enough to help protect the littlest ones which was a welcome development. Molly had driven up with her kids just like Ali, and Sydney had brought her boys with her for the week because Dom was travelling with the Revs. The rest of the camp counselors and coaches were all gathered around just relaxing and talking about how successful the inaugural session had been. Ali, along with everybody else, was more than a little starstruck by Mia Hamm. She almost fell over when Nomar Garciaparra, Mia’s husband, showed up with their 12-year old son, Garrett, to pick Mia up that Thursday afternoon. That relationship, that match made in heaven as far as Ali was concerned, had rocked 19-year old Ali’s world. It was like soccer royalty marrying Boston sports fan royalty and even while the brunette was enjoying what would turn out to be the pinnacle of her own soccer success in 2003 at Penn State, she was still infatuated with the pairing. Mia had been one of the biggest influences on young Ali Krieger, soccer star, and Nomar Garciaparra was a beloved Boston Red Sox hero and all-around good guy. He once famously jumped into Boston Harbor outside his downtown condominium to save two women from drowning for God’s sake. They were both Olympians. They were both good people who rarely, if ever, said or did the wrong thing. They were both quiet and reserved, especially considering their talents and achievements and fame. It was a marriage that just made everybody happy. Ali was slowly getting used to calling Tobin Heath and Christen Press and the many other Tarheels ‘friends’. It had been one thing to be the agent for a lot of women’s soccer stars, but it was a whole other thing to have Alex Morgan shoot you a casual text about something she saw that would be perfect for Ashlyn’s birthday. Seriously? But there was just no way the brunette was ever going to be able to act normal around Mia freaking Hamm. No way.

“So I keep waiting for Ash to get better with her golf clubs and she finally lets it spill this week that you’re the real golfer in the family” Mia smiled as she stood next to Ali and watched the twins try to kick a much too big soccer ball.

“Oh” Ali’s mouth went bone dry and she could feel her lips sticking to her teeth as she smiled almost painfully big at her childhood idol. “I don’t know about that” she laughed nervously. “I don’t get to play too much anymore...”

“I remember” Mia gave her another warm smile and then rolled her eyes. “There was no time for golf or much of anything else when my twins were their age” she nodded at Dodge and Lily who were both giggling at each other every time one of them fell over, which was every other attempted kick. “It gets easier to be yourself again once they can all eat and go to the bathroom by themselves” she chuckled. “But then you’ll wish they were this age again” she looked wistfully at the little kids running around.

“I can’t even begin to think about any of that” Ali sighed and shook her head. “I still can’t believe we have five kids!” she raised her eyebrows in wonder, including Meg in the count as both she and Ashlyn had started doing a few years ago. “We were so cocky once we got good at having the one...”

“See, we never had that chance. Twins right off the bat was kind of a rude awakening and a tough intro into the world of parenting.”

“But everything after them must have felt easy” Ali joked, surprised at how easy it was to talk to, arguably, the greatest female soccer player of all time.

“Absolutely!” Mia laughed with her and then they were quiet for a minute, just taking in everything happening in front of them.

“It’s so great that you’re here” Ali finally said, trying to keep her voice steady. “It means so much to the girls, and the rest of us, I won’t lie...” she blushed a little. “I had your poster on my wall. I wanted to grow up and be just like you and Kristine Lilly and Julie Foudy and Joy Fawcett...”

“I’m happy to be here. This is really amazing what Ash and the other girls have done up here. This place is going to make a difference. We probably saw the next Joy Fawcett or Michelle Akers out here this week and we don’t even know it yet. That’s what gets me excited. Imagine if we had places like this when we were their age...” she smiled but there was a little sadness mixed in too. 

“Wouldn’t that have been something?” Ali breathed out as she thought about the possibilities.

They talked for several more minutes and Ali confessed that one of the very happiest days of her entire life had been attending the 1999 WWC final at the Rose Bowl in California. One of her favorite photos was of she and Kyle, dressed and decorated appropriately to cheer on the greatest women’s team the world had ever seen. Mia admitted that she had asked around about the sports agent who started her own firm to take better care of female athletes, wanting to learn a bit more about her before making her offer.

“I host a charity golf tournament every year down in North Carolina, in the Fall usually, and I’d love it if you’d consider joining us sometime” the soccer legend chuckled at the shocked look on Ali’s face and nudged her arm. “It’s all for fun, but I’m pretty selective about who plays. It got messy one year and I swore I’d either keep it under control or stop doing it altogether.”

“Holy shit, Mia, I don’t know what to say...” she stammered and made her idol laugh at her honest expletive.

“I’d love to have both you and Ashlyn join us, but I don’t know” she made an eek face. “We went to the driving range the other night and, well, there’s a reason I’m starting with you first” she laughed loudly.

“Oh I feel bad” Ali explained through her own laughter. “She was just starting to get better and then this happened” she motioned broadly towards all the kids running around. “She’s such a good athlete though, once she gets some time with it I know she’ll be a great golfer” she finished, proudly defending her wife.

“I have no doubt” Mia chuckled. “So, just consider it. I know you’re busy, but it’s a great cause and I really like to get as many women to play as possible. We ex-athletes need to stick together” she winked.

“But...” Ali couldn’t imagine that Mia knew she used to play soccer. How on earth could she possibly know about a girl who played two years at Penn State while she was busy getting married and then going to win Gold in the 2004 Olympics in Athens.

“One of my girls is starting at UNC this Fall and she just tore her ACL” Mia looked down and clenched her jaw.

“Oh no” Ali breathed out and touched her arm gently. “I’m so sorry. That’s so hard.”

“I thought of Ashlyn right away. I’ve never heard a worse start to anybody’s college soccer career than that poor girl” she shook her head. “She gave me a lot of good advice this week and we got to talking about how lucky she had been to be able to come back. She told me a little about your story” Mia looked shyly at Ali, feeling like she had intruded. “I hope that’s ok...”

“Yeah, sure” Ali shrugged self-consciously. “I just...I guess I’m not sure that’s the story you want to tell your daughter” she chuckled awkwardly.

“I didn’t get why Ash was telling me the story at first either” Mia explained. “I wanted to let Gracie know that you could have an absolutely devastating start and, as long as you worked hard and never gave up, you could come back and still have a successful and fulfilling career” she paused for several seconds while Ali still looked confused. “But Ash thought it would be good to let her know that even if her soccer dreams didn’t turn out the way she hoped, she could still go out and do great things in this world. She could risk everything she had to start a new company that nobody else thought was needed, just so other girls like her could get a fair chance if their soccer dreams did work out.” 

Ali was stunned by the compliment and kind, sincere words. She probably would have stood there, stock still, for another ten minutes if Dodge and James hadn’t just smacked right into each other at a full run. Thankfully, Dodge bounced right up with a goofy grin on his face while Ashlyn and Sydney ran out to check on James who was still laying on his back. He sat up a minute later and the keeper turned and gave her wife a thumbs up, letting her know both boys were ok.

“I don’t know what to say” Ali turned her attention back to Mia, “again” she rolled her eyes and blushed. “I talk for a living and here you’ve had me speechless twice in twenty minutes” she laughed. “Don’t tell any of my clients” she teased.

“Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me” she smiled again. “It’s really nice to talk with you Ali and I hope to see you again soon.”

The whole conversation had been surreal. Ali could not believe she and Mia Hamm had just casually chatted about life, both big and small. She had things in common with Mia freaking Hamm! What planet was she even living on at the moment?! Before they hugged goodbye Mia had told her that she would email her the details and when Ali started to worry about not having a business card on her person at that very moment, Mia revealed that Ashlyn had already given her all the details. The brunette scanned the large group for her wife and finally spotted her off to the side of the recreation deck with her finger in her ear and her phone up to the other side of her head.

Ashlyn had just finished a phone call with Whitney, giving her the good report on the first session and week of camp and was about to go talk with Julie, Emma and Mickey Donaldson before they started their drive back to Gloucester.

“You know, this is a wonderful achievement” Ken’s voice surprised the keeper as he touched her elbow.

“Oh...well...um...” she grabbed the back of her neck, nervously, and stammered.

“Really” he put his arm around her shoulders and gave her a squeeze. “I’m not just saying it because I think you want to hear it” he clarified. “I’m proud of you Ashlyn and you should be proud too.”

The keeper couldn’t talk. She was overcome with emotion and she turned and hugged her father-in-law tightly. Ken was surprised but recovered quickly and wrapped his arms around Ashlyn too.

“Wow, I guess I didn’t realize how much I cared what you thought about it” she confessed a minute later as they separated. “I mean, of course I cared...” her eyes went wide when she heard how her words sounded. “But I didn’t think I’d be this emotional about it” she smiled at him, hoping he understood what she was trying to say. She exhaled loudly and closed her eyes, taking a beat before saying anything else. “Thank you” she smiled sheepishly at him and let him tug her into another hug.

“I would have joined you no matter what” he spoke from inside the hug. “But I’m honored to be a part of this. Thank you Ash.”


	27. Deep and Steadfast

Later that afternoon the Kriegers drove home, as did most of the other coaches and camp counselors. The Academy allowed campers to pay extra and stay over the weekend, Friday and Saturday, in what they called a ‘Bridge Session’ if they were going to be joining them for the next weekly session. Campers like Meg who were going to be there for multiple sessions could go home between sessions or they could do the Bridge session in between and hang out at the beautiful camp. Depending on the number of Bridge session participants, there would only be a skeleton crew of staffers up at The Academy on Fridays and Saturdays. During her 6-week stay Meg was planning to go back to the big old house with Ashlyn as much as possible. Although she and Emma did end up staying for two Bridge sessions together and had a really fun time.

“Oh God, what the hell?” Ali groaned as she saw the blue lights of the NH State Police cruiser in her rear-view mirror. 

She had just pulled the minivan onto Route 101 a few minutes earlier as she drove the four Krieger kids home. Ashlyn drove the truck with Meg her only passenger. They wanted to talk about the first week of camp and the drive seemed like the best way to make that happen. They were already past the minivan even though the keeper had left the camp parking lot after her wife. There had been a sippy cup incident in the back row of the minivan so Ali had to pull over on the winding gravel road just outside the camp to take care of that. The rule in the car was that if you threw anything, which was already breaking the no-throwing things in the car rule, it was gone. No matter what. The tricky part was determining a throw from an honest drop. The twins were two and they had little hands and they dropped things. A lot. And when your eyes were on the road in front of you, where they belonged, it was almost impossible to know for sure exactly what happened. Dodge and Lily were in the back row and Josie and Drew were in the two seats in the middle row, by the sliding doors. It had been a calculated decision that followed much debate. It made more sense to have the youngest kids closer to Ali and Ashlyn in the front seat so they could help them more or get to them faster if necessary. But, they were both terrified of Dodge getting out of his seat and somehow getting the sliding door open. There were safety features and locks and he was strapped into his carseat so it was never actually going to happen. But once Ashlyn had suggested the nightmare scenario her wife hadn’t been able to get it out of her head. So the twins were in the back row, safe and secure. 

Then, after Ashlyn had driven by them and honked hello and goodbye on the main road out of Greenfield, the brunette had to pull over again. It had only been ten minutes but she couldn’t take it anymore. Dodge, without his sippy cup because he had thrown it, was bored and fussy and had been teasing his twin sister for ten straight minutes. He would reach over and poke her leg or tap her or even sweetly pat her arm sometimes. The kid was on a roll and the brunette was losing her temper. The other rule in the car was no touching each other. Almost every single fracas they had ever had in any moving vehicle began by someone throwing something or touching somebody else. At first Lily didn’t mind the attention and she played along, reaching over and returning the pat or the poke with a giggle. Ali had warned them and had flat out told them to stop, twice. She knew what was coming but what she didn’t know was how quickly it would happen and to what degree.

Those ten minutes consisted mainly of Lily crying and then screaming and then crying again as the reciprocal touching and poking had escalated and devolved into Dodge and Lily smacking each other harder and harder. 

“That’s it!” she pulled over, unlocked the doors and hopped out of the minivan in a fury. She opened the sliding door behind her and tried to look apologetically at Drew but she was too frustrated to really pull it off. “Sorry buddy but I need you to switch with Dodge” she unbuckled her eldest son and told him to stand by the front seats. Then she had to unbuckle Dodge and get him to stand up there too. “Don’t move and don’t you dare touch your brother. Just stand there, do you understand?”

Dodge knew he was in trouble so he was on his best behavior as he stood stiffly next to Drew. Josie watched the whole thing from the best seat in the van as her mommy switched Dodge’s carseat for Drew’s smaller booster seat and re-strapped both safety seats into their swapped places. Lily was still crying and Ali tried to soothe her, even though she was just as aggravated with her for disobeying her and breaking the no touching rule too. The brunette could see the red mark on Lily’s arm and felt bad for a minute.

“Lily, honey, you’re ok. Stop crying now, everything’s ok.”

“Dod hit” she whined through her tears.

“Yes he did and he’ll get punished for that when we get home” she explained as she put Dodge into the bucket seat next to Josie and buckled him in. “But you were hitting him too. Even after I told you to stop touching each other, right?”

Lily sniffled and looked down as Drew moved back to the back row and climbed into his seat. Ali climbed into the van and hunched over between the two middle row seats so she could help him with the buckle but he wouldn’t move his hands.

“I can do it mommy” he said defiantly as he tried to get the seat belt pushed into the receiving end.

Ali bit her tongue and tried to be patient as he made three and four attempts but couldn’t quite get the angle right. The brunette finally just reached over him and did it.

“I’m sorry Drew” she patted his leg. “We’ve gotta get going so we can get home and have dinner with Mama and Meg.”

She backed up a couple of steps and hovered between Josie and Dodge in the middle row but looked at all four of her children.

“Now no more you guys. I mean it. You know the rules and I don’t want any more of them broken. Do not touch each other. At all. Keep your hands and feet to yourselves.”

“Mommy” Dodge looked up at her with a sincere and sweet face. “Cup?”

“No you can’t have your sippy cup Dodge. You threw it. You can’t have it until we get home” she answered as she got back into the driver’s seat and started the engine. “Why don’t you all just watch the show and relax for a while, ok?” she suggested, referring to the Blu-Ray player’s video screen that hung down from the roof of the minivan just behind the front seats.

Ten more minutes later, just when she thought she had restored order and everybody had calmed down, the Statie pulled her over on the side of the highway. She clenched her jaw and muttered four-letter words under her breath as the young man approached her window.

“How we doing ma’am?” he asked as he looked in through her open window. “License and registration please” he asked without waiting for her to reply to his first question.

“Sure...” she offered quickly as she reached for her wallet inside her purse on the empty passenger seat. Dodge knocked on the window next to him and waved at the officer. “Dodge, don’t do that” she reached into the glove compartment and started fishing for the registration. “Can you tell me why you pulled us over?” she asked, still rifling through extra napkins and handi-wipes in the glove compartment.

“Your registration sticker has expired.”

“What?” she finally put her hand on the paper registration that had been folded in thirds and pulled it out to look at it.

Sure enough, the expiration date on her registration for the minivan was March 31, 2025. Unfuckingbelievable. Anybody who lived in Massachusetts and had MA license plates had heard the stories about getting pulled over if they ventured into New Hampshire. One of Ali’s good friends from BU lived in NH and flat out told her that NH cops looked for MA drivers and pulled them over for any little thing they could. The brunette never really thought much of it, but she did pay extra close attention to the speed limit whenever she drove through NH. Was that what this was? This state police officer looked really young. Maybe he was just over-eager or something. This had never happened to Ali before and she didn’t really know what happened next. She handed him the registration and mustered up her best, but most pathetic smile.

“Are you sure?” she asked politely.

“Yes ma’am. I’m sure. Did you know you’ve been driving an unregistered vehicle since the end of March?” he squinted at her and leaned his arm on the roof of the minivan above her window. Ali didn’t think he meant to sound so condescending, but he sure came across like an arrogant little prick. “That’s an awful long time, don’t you think?”

By the time Ashlyn ran through the doors of the NH State Police barracks in Milford, NH, it had been almost three hours since Ali had been pulled over. The brunette had called her wife as soon as it was obvious she was not going to be getting off with just a warning. The keeper and Meg had to go all the way home to get the damned registration before she could drive back up with it. Meg happily stayed home with the dogs and a much better wifi connection than she’d had all week. A law enforcement officer can’t let you drive an unregistered vehicle, under any circumstances. Apparently not even if two, and then three, small children start to whine and cry while you stand on the side of the highway waiting for the tow truck and the police passenger van to come and take you back to the barracks. It was just after 7pm and all four kids were hungry and tired and confused and, honestly, a little afraid. Ali had given them all of the snacks she had, which had been quite a few, and had run out of food and patience about an hour ago. The only saving grace was the small television up high in the corner of the room. One of the officers had been nice enough to tune it to the Nickelodeon channel, which was the only kids channel they got, and that had helped hold their attention for short spans of time.

“Oh baby I’m so sorry” Ashlyn apologized profusely as she quickly closed the distance between them and kissed her wife on the head as she greeted the kids. “Hey guys, ok just sit tight for a few more minutes while I get this straightened out. Then we can go home...”

“We need to feed them first” Ali replied, her voice flat and tired as she tried to keep Josie from having a fit about having to wait even longer. “Jose come on honey, you can hold it together for a little while longer, I know you can sweetheart” she lifted the tired, hungry and cranky girl onto her lap and hugged her.

It took almost thirty minutes for Ashlyn to explain what had happened and produce the correct paperwork.

“I’ve got the registration and the sticker right here” she waved the paper with the small square sticker secured to the bottom right corner. “It’s all paid for and has been since March. I just forgot to put it in the car. That’s all this is. The insurance never lapsed and the registration was renewed on time. I just...I just fucked up, big time” she slumped her shoulders when her plea didn’t seem to be having any effect on the officer in front of her. “Please, sir, please give me a break and let me put my family back in the van and take them home.”

“As much as I’d like to do that for you, Ms...” he looked at her driver’s license and registration again, “Krieger, the impound lot is closed for the night so there’s no way to get your vehicle until 8am tomorrow.”

“You’ve gotta be kidding me!”

Ali heard her wife’s raised voice from across the room and said another silent prayer. At that point she didn’t really care about leaving the minivan if they had to. They could come back up tomorrow and get it. All she wanted was to feed the kids and get them home and into bed before the full-on meltdown happened. And that was imminent. But they couldn’t fit all four kids’ carseats in the truck. Fuck. That must have been why the keeper was trying so hard with the officer at the desk.

“That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard!” Ashlyn’s voice carried over again.

“There’s no need to get upset now” the officer tried to calm the keeper down but it wasn’t working.

“Those kids haven’t had their dinner yet. And their bedtime is in about an hour. And I can feel a complete meltdown coming from at least two of them any minute now. If you won’t give me my van back, how the hell am I supposed to get them home?” her voice was low and full of barely-controlled anger as she stared at the officer.

“That’s not really my problem, ma’am.”

Right on cue, Lily started to cry from the waiting area with the plastic chairs on the other side of the room. It was all about to explode right that minute and Ashlyn knew it.

“Well, it’s about to be your problem. What time is your shift over, officer...Perkins?” she leaned closer to read the name on his shirt as she spoke, urgency in her voice. “It’s gonna be a long, horrible night here in your barracks for all of us.”

“Hey, aren’t you that soccer player?” a different voice rang out with excitement. “Yeah, your face is on the billboard over by the hospital” the second officer continued with a big grin as he walked towards the desk Ashlyn was sitting in front of.

There must have just been a shift change because four new officers came into the room through a side door and greeted their colleagues with smiles and pats on the back. Once the second officer mentioned the billboard, officer Perkins seemed to recognize Ashlyn too. It only took a few friendly smiles and a couple of stories about Julian Edelman, Tom Brady, Bob Kraft and a few other big-name athletes to completely change the vibe in the room. Lily was still crying and Ali was seriously considering putting them all in the backseat of the truck, without carseats, and driving away. Finally, after the whole sad story had been explained to the second officer, he found a way to get the minivan out of the impound lot and brought back to the barracks within the hour. When the minivan arrived, Ashlyn started to get a better understanding of just what a pain in the ass the whole ordeal had been for her wife. They couldn’t just pile into the van and head to the closest restaurant right away. She saw the pile of carseats in the corner of the barracks waiting area, next to the big bag of kid crap that accompanied them wherever they went. Luckily, they hadn’t run out of diapers yet. The carseats had been removed from the minivan, installed into the police passenger van, and then removed again just to get them to the barracks. The keeper, followed by her new-found officer friends still talking and laughing about some of her stories, picked up two carseats before Ali stood up.

“I’ll do it” the brunette said evenly, her voice flat and heavy with stress.

Ashlyn knew from the look on her wife’s face that this was not a request, nor was it negotiable. She took Ali’s seat and tried to get Lily to stop sniveling by picking her up and distracting her with a tour of the barracks main area she had just been in with officer Perkins. All of the kids wanted to see it so the blonde carefully led them back and around the boring, but new to them, desk area. The second officer acted as tour guide while Ashlyn tried to keep an eye on Dodge, wishing he had been the one in her arms so he couldn’t get into trouble. They stopped and thanked officer Perkins for his help – the only sarcasm coming from Ashlyn. 

“Mama” Josie tugged on her shorts. “I hafta use the potty.”

“Ok little one, let’s see...” the blonde tried to figure out how to take Josie to the bathroom without letting the other three run wild. “Ummmm, how did mommy do it?” she finally just asked her children.

“We went with her” Drew answered with a heavy sigh.

Ashlyn cringed at the thought of having to bring all four kids into the small 2-stall, 1-sink bathroom that was just off of the waiting area. Oh well. Time to suck it up. Just as they got to the door, Ali came in to grab the big bag and the other random things that had come out of it and spread across the hard, plastic chairs they had occupied for almost four hours now. She recognized her wife’s predicament, saw Ashlyn point to Josie, and then called Dodge and Drew over.

“Let’s go boys” she mustered a tired smile. “We’ll get in the car while Mama takes Josie to the bathroom. Drew do you need to pee before we get in?”

“Nuh-uh” he shook his head no and leaned into Ali’s hip in a half-hug while they waited for Dodge to make his way over to them.

Ashlyn smiled appreciatively and tried to find a glimmer of forgiveness in her favorite cinnamon eyes. It was too soon. Ali tried to give her a small smile but it didn’t register on her face. She was truly relieved for the first time in four hours now that Lily had stopped crying and the solution was almost complete. An hour later, at 9:30pm, they were driving home, following each other in their two vehicles, after stopping at a diner that was still open. Thankfully, the grilled cheese sandwiches and French fries were up to snuff for the hungry and over-tired Krieger kids and everybody had eaten a very late dinner.

“I’m so sorry baby” Ashlyn kissed the side of her wife’s head as they shared a quick hug in the parking lot of the diner after getting the kids loaded into the minivan. “So, so sorry” she repeated as she gave Ali an extra squeeze.

“I know” Ali offered as she hugged her back. 

She was pretty sure the whole thing would be funny in the morning, or maybe the next afternoon. But it was still too soon that night. And, honestly, she was pissed at Ashlyn for forgetting to put the registration in the minivan and the new sticker on the license plate to begin with. It was one of the things the keeper had always done for all the vehicles except for Ali’s truck. The Suburu vehicles, including the minivan, were all in Ashlyn’s name and the registration came addressed to her. That’s how it started. She always took care of the registration, every two years, as well as the annual vehicle emissions inspection. Ali handled those things for her truck, but Ashlyn took care of her jeep, the Suburu coupe and the minivan. The brunette understood what had happened. It made sense. The registration letter had come in the mail a month before the current one expired. Ashlyn had renewed it online with her credit card and put it in the desk in the mudroom for safekeeping until it was time to switch them out. The Spring had been so busy with Whitney’s baby and then the mad rush to get The Academy completed, that the keeper had simply forgotten about it. It was an honest mistake that Ali was sure her keeper would never make again as long as she lived. 

But it was time to get the kids home and into bed. They ended the hug and Ali moved to get into the driver’s seat of the minivan when Ashlyn’s strong arm blocked her path.

“Ash, I just want to get home” she whined, thinking her wife was trying to be cute or something to make her feel better.

“Me too honey, but you’re not getting back in there tonight” she nodded at the van and smiled warmly at her beautiful brunette. “I’ve got this one, you take that one” she held out her hand with the key to the truck in it. “As long as you’re not going to fall asleep...”

“I won’t, I promise” Ali chuckled and gave her keeper a quick kiss. “Thank you.”

“You’ve more than earned a little break Al” Ashlyn patted her butt as she turned towards the truck behind the minivan. “Call me if you get tired.”

Later that night, after they carefully carried four sleeping children upstairs and tucked them into bed, Ali and Ashlyn checked on Meg and the dogs and then went to bed themselves.

“You know what I love?” Ali asked sleepily as she backed her ass up into Ashlyn’s front as they spooned.

“Tell me” the keeper replied softly and kissed her wife’s shoulder in front of her.

“That I don’t have to explain how much I love those kids to you” she started, her words slow and sleepy. “That I don’t have to apologize for wanting and needing to get away from them for a little while. You get it. You know that just because I would rather have chopped my arm off than get back into that car with them tonight, it doesn’t mean I don’t love them with all my heart” she yawned. “I fucking love that.”

“Me too” Ashlyn squeezed her and smiled when she heard Ali hum her approval. “But before you give me too much credit, I think it’s only fair to tell you that they all fell asleep within five minutes and it was the easiest drive with them I’ve ever had” she tensed her body for a few seconds, anticipating a smack or a slap from her wife. But none came. Instead Ali pulled her wife’s arm tighter across her stomach and yawned again.

“That figures” she chuckled softly, eyes getting even heavier. “But you and I both know that if I had driven them home they would have been fighting and arguing the whole way. It’s Murphy’s Law. I’m glad we both had peaceful drives home babe. Thank you.”

“You’re perfect, you know that?” Ashlyn leaned forward and kissed Ali’s cheek. “Just fucking perfect and I’m so lucky.”

“Aw, you’re sweet, but I’m not perfect” she patted Ashlyn’s arm and smiled sleepily. “I’m just tired and grateful honey. I love you.”

//

The summer when Drew turned two years old, Ashlyn took him up to her studio and spent an entire morning helping him paint. She laid out a big, three foot by two foot canvas for him, opened up several different colors of non-toxic paint that was approved for kids to use, stripped him to just his diaper, and let him go nuts. She made him stay in control and well-behaved, she hadn’t completely lost her mind, but she let him do whatever he wanted on the canvas. She was curious to see what he would come up with and she encouraged him to just paint what he felt like painting. It made her sad when he looked up at her for approval after each move he made, unwilling to continue until he got it. She found it interesting that he preferred to use the big brush she had placed near the paint, instead of his own two hands. Even at 6 years old he still didn’t like to get his hands too yucky. The keeper had also put out a couple of smaller, more normal-sized paintbrushes but he wasn’t interested in those. They were too small and didn’t hold enough paint for his liking. When they had been up there for almost three hours, Deb finally came in to make sure they were both still alright. It took the both of them another forty-five minutes to get Drew bathed and paint-free again so they could all go down to lunch. 

There wasn’t much from that summer that Ashlyn liked to remember. Josie had just been born and it was some of the worst times the keeper had ever gone through in her adult life. She had been trying to handle her PTSD by herself, not sleeping, taking care of Drew as much as possible and trying to help Ali with poor, sickly little Josie. Then she and Ali had their big, awful fight and things spiraled out of control until Ashlyn finally broke down in the driveway. But all summer long she would find her way up to the studio every few days. She didn’t really have a plan for Drew’s painting when she started it. But as the summer went by she realized what she wanted to do with the big canvas that was so full of color and energy and life. Ashlyn touched up the painting, cleaning up a few big glops and smoothing out some edges, but nothing other than those slight touches. She took a small, delicate brush and signed Drew’s name to the bottom corner, in red paint – his favorite color. Then she had it framed and hung it on the interior wall above the couch in the studio. Whatever she struggled with later that brutal year, when she looked at that painting she always felt the freedom and joy Drew had experienced while painting it. It helped lift her up past her broken leg and her concussion and her big, scary life changes that followed that Fall. 

It became a thing she did with all of her kids. She waited until the summer when they turned two years old so they had a chance to hold the brush and really make some decisions about what they wanted to paint. She had lucked out with Drew, picking that age more out of necessity and circumstance than anything else. But as she researched it, she learned that it had been a very good age. Drew had been old enough to actively participate and enjoy it but not so old that he was inhibited by any rules or restrictions that couldn’t be easily shrugged off. Which had been why he stopped looking up at his Mama for permission or approval after the first few times he painted a stroke or a blob on the canvas. Josie was a natural and it was clear to the keeper that her daughter was a very creative child. The redhead had loved coloring and fingerpainting from the moment she first tried them. She never once looked up at Ashlyn for permission of any kind when she got her turn to paint on her own big canvas the summer the twins were born. 

This summer Dodge and Lily would get their turns and the keeper didn’t want to risk waiting for a good time at the end of the summer. She was going to Germany for the last two weeks of July and the first week of August to cover the EUROs and she really wanted to get the painting done before she left and life got even busier for everybody. Friday morning, July 11th, Ashlyn took Lily up to the studio to do her painting. The keeper had been trying to find a good time to get her youngest daughter up there because she knew that if Lily wasn’t in the right mood that it was going to be a shitshow. She’d rather not even do one than have it devolve into something painful or awful. Ashlyn told herself that if Lily wasn’t in a cooperative mood then she would just take Dodge up instead. But Lily did a great job and was agreeable to the whole thing. She really was a good girl most of the time. It’s just that when she was in a bad mood the whole house suffered. Her mothers both feared she would be that way her whole life and there wasn’t much they could do about it except love her no matter what, try to teach her to handle her emotions, and pray for a lot of good moods. Dodge got his turn the very next day and loved it. True to his nature, his painting was more Pollack-esque with drips and drops and splatters and some streaks that were evidence of the strength he already had in his little arms and hands. The keeper couldn’t wait to touch up both new paintings, sign them and frame them just as she had done to Drew and Josie’s. Ali had always wondered why they didn’t hang the paintings in the kids’ bedrooms and when she suggested it to Drew and Josie during the re-decorating frenzy for the twins’ big kid beds, Josie had jumped at the idea. She carefully picked out the wall to hang it on, making sure she could see it from her bed. Drew was much less enthusiastic and Ashlyn didn’t think he really wanted to hang it up in his room at all. But then he saw how cool Josie’s looked in her room and decided to be excited about it after all. 

The truth was, Ali loved looking at them more than anybody else. They made her think of her child at first and then also about her wife who was so creative and talented and willing to share both of those gifts with their children. The brunette never failed to be inspired and moved by those big paintings. She loved them and she loved that Ashlyn had done it on her own, using her own creativity to help encourage the kids to find their own. 

“So how did he do?” Ali finally got to ask her wife about Drew’s painting experience later that afternoon as they hung out at the beach with Drew and Josie during the twins’ naptime. Deb was at the house and they had just come back up from the water to relax and dry off a little bit. Wet skin baking in the hot summer sun. Drew and Josie were playing about ten feet away where the sand was harder as the tide was on its way out. “Did he completely destroy it?” she chuckled and kept her voice low so only her wife could hear her.

“No” Ashlyn laughed with her and reached over to hold Ali’s hand on the big beach blanket they were sharing. “He did really good” she smiled as she thought back to her morning in the studio with Dodge. “He’s so curious and eager to do things...I love that about him so much.”

“He really is up for anything, isn’t he?” the brunette turned onto her side and propped her head up in her hand so she could stare at her beautiful wife.

Ashlyn was leaving for Germany Sunday evening at 5pm so she would arrive at 7am Monday morning. Three weeks was a long time and neither of them was looking forward to the separation. They didn’t sugarcoat it either. Neither of them were too proud to admit how much they were going to miss the other. They had decided to make a vacation out of it and Ali would fly to Germany for the last half of Ashlyn’s trip. Thank God. It had been three weeks of The Academy so far and the family had settled into Ashlyn’s new schedule nicely. They missed her when she stayed at the camp Sunday and Tuesday nights but had gotten used to it. Ali had been dreading this weekend for a while now, knowing it would be so very bittersweet. She had been extra clingy, as had Ashlyn, all week and this afternoon at the beach was no different. Ali would never normally lay on her side like that. You were just inviting an uneven tan. But she was dying to be close to her wife and wanted to keep her beautiful keeper in her sight at all costs. She boldly rested her hand on Ashlyn’s hip and slowly moved her thumb back and forth across the bare skin above her short, green, board shorts.

“He got too excited a couple of times and we almost had a paint throwing problem” she chuckled as she turned her head to meet Ali’s eyes. “But I got it just in the nick of time.”

They were quiet for a few minutes as they gazed at each other and listened to Drew and Josie playing and talking together as they built some sort of sand sculpture. Honestly, it was just a big mountain of sand. It was a beautiful day with bright blue skies full of puffy white clouds. It was in the 80s but there was a nice breeze coming in off the water.

“This feels like the beach in Maui today” Ali grinned as she remembered the honeymoon they finally took when she was 5 months pregnant with Drew. “Just gorgeous.”

“Wow, those are some good memories you just called to mind baby” Ashlyn smirked as she reached over and cupped Ali’s cheek. “God I want to kiss you so bad right now” she groaned and dropped her hand as if any prolonged skin to skin contact would make it even more difficult to restrain herself.

“Well I won’t stop you” Ali flirted and bit her bottom lip.

It was uncharacteristic of the brunette but Ashlyn understood exactly what was driving her wife. They both felt the pull and didn’t really want to fight it. The keeper smiled softly and rolled over onto her side, mirroring Ali’s position. She was careful not to touch any other part of her wife’s body because she knew when she did it would just fan the flames and that was the last thing she wanted to do that afternoon at the crowded public beach with their two young children. 

“I love you” she whispered as she moved her face within an inch of Ali’s and then gave her a slow, sweet kiss.

It took every ounce of willpower for Ali not to deepen the kiss or move her hand on Ashyn’s hip. Her eyes were still shut when the blonde pulled away and she could still feel the buzz on her lips as she slowly pressed them together. Ashlyn smiled when she saw Ali’s eyes still closed. She loved knowing she could still impact her beautiful brunette with something as simple as a chaste, public kiss. It was moments like that where everything disappeared except for the love of her life in front of her. Work, laundry, corporate foundations, dinnertime battles, soccer camps, dirty diapers, everything fell away, off in the distant periphery of the beauty that was a foot away. Nine years vanished and Ashlyn was gazing into the most gorgeous face she had ever seen with nothing to distract them or pull them out of their bubble. In a flash they were back to that first winter of 2016 when they simply fell more and more in love with each other with every passing day. They could watch each other sleep and kiss and love one another for hours, beautiful, glorious, uninterrupted hours. Their lives had changed radically since then, but the feelings, the emotions, the love had not. It had only deepened and grown and flourished as their two lives became one. They didn’t have all the time in the world anymore and there were demands and pressures and obligations that all married couples with children experienced. But for Ali and Ashlyn, the undeniable love that originally drew them together was still there, running underneath everything in their daily lives like a deep, steadfast river. That river powered everything in their lives, churning through the tough times and rolling along through the good. 

“I miss you already” Ali admitted shyly as her eyelids fluttered open. “I’m trying not to...I mean, I’m trying not to let that ruin today and tomorrow, but it’s so hard” she squeezed her wife’s hip and got lost in her hazel eyes for a few seconds.

“It’s been nice not leaving you every other week anymore...well, aside from these past few weeks with The Academy anyway.”

“I know” Ali whined adorably and dropped her head down onto the blanket, getting off of her elbow, keeping her eyes on the blonde. “I’m so spoiled now and I’m totally not sorry.”

She moved her hand up from Ashlyn’s hip and let her keeper hold it between them on the blanket. They shared another long, loving look, both smiling softly as they intertwined their fingers.

“Eleven days baby” Ashlyn exhaled and squeezed her wife’s hand. “Then I’ll see you at the airport in the morning on the twelfth day and you can show me your Germany. I can’t wait for that” she broke into her dimpled grin. “If eleven days without holding you is the price I have to pay for that, then I’ll do it, gladly.”


	28. EUROs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting a second chapter tonight because I feel like it.  
> Also, Ali's being a model again tonight at the Becky's Fund Charity catwalk event in DC. Can't wait for the pictures. I thought she looked gorgeous last year (shocker, I know.)

Ashlyn had been contracted to cover the 2025 EUROs since just after she worked on the 2023 Women’s World Cup. It had taken a little bit of time for her popularity to travel to the other side of the pond, but she had finally made the jump. Everyone at ESPN’s Germany-based production base was excited to have the intriguing blonde join them for the tournament. It wasn’t as big as the WWC or the Olympics, but it was probably the next biggest tournament in women’s soccer. Only European countries were eligible to compete and the qualifying could be fierce. Germany had been crowned champions eight times in the thirteen times the tournament had been held, at one point winning a stunning six championships in a row. Their streak was broken in 2017 when host nation The Netherlands surprised the world by winning it all. England had hosted the last tournament in 2021 and watched France take home the trophy. The EUROs this year, the 14th edition of the UEFA Women’s Championship, were supposed to be the year the Germans righted the ship and won it all again. They were the host country, for the fourth time and the first time since 2001, and they were hellbent on making the most of any homefield advantage they could get. 

ESPN was using two broadcast teams that would travel from location to location to cover the games throughout the three-week tournament. There were 16 teams competing out of four different groups to start. Then, after playing each team in their group, the knockout rounds began. 8 teams made the quarterfinal round, 4 teams made the semifinal round, and then the last two teams competed for the championship in the Final. To say that Germany was a hotbed of soccer talent and fandom would be an understatement. The country was more than ready to experience some of the best women’s football in the world and fill some big stadiums in the process. The tournament started on Sunday July 16th and there were two group stage games played every single day for the next twelve days. If it was a weekday the games started at 5pm and then 8pm. If it was a Saturday or a Sunday they began at 4pm and 7pm. The idea being to try and give people a chance to work their jobs and then come to the 5pm game. There were six different host cities that would welcome fans to the group stage games as well as the quarterfinals and semifinals. They were spread out around Germany so everybody had a chance to participate as a fan or a local business reaping the rewards of increased tourism and commerce. Three of the cities were sort of on the Western side of the country and the other three on the Eastern. They were also spread out North to South as well. The two broadcast teams started at opposite corners and moved from city to city in a clockwise manner, as the games did. The championship game would be played in one of the biggest stadiums in the country, Signal Iduna Park in Dortmund – capacity of 80,000, which was roughly near the North West area of the other host cities.

The first broadcast team paired Sylvia Neid, the former player and coach of the German national team, with Caroline Seger, former player for the Swedish national team. The idea was to have someone the Germans knew and loved and respected as a world-class footballer and then pair them with a former player from another popular country who knew their stuff and had some sort of mass appeal to the rest of the women’s soccer world. Team One was definitely all set in both regards. Broadcast Team Two was Ashlyn, who still went by Ashlyn Harris when it came to soccering and commentating, and arguably the best player ever to play for Germany, Birgit Prinz. They were all roughly the same age, with Sylvia being the outlier at 61-years old. Birgit was 48 and worked as a sports psychologist for both the men’s and women’s teams at Hoffenheim in the Bundesliga. She had won two WWCs, in 2003 and 2007, and earned three bronze medals in the Olympics, 2000, 2004 and 2008 before retiring in 2011. Birgit was such an incredible striker that she won FIFA’s best player of the year three times in a row, 2003, 2004 and 2005. But what might have been just as impressive was that she came in second for that award to Mia Hamm in 2002 and then four times in a row to Marta from 2007 – 2010. The woman was one of the two best players in the entire world from 2002 – 2010! Talk about consistency and excellence. Birgit was an inch taller than Ashlyn and she had short dark hair and a plain but attractive face. She was quiet and serious for the most part, as she had been on the pitch during her playing days, and turned out to be a perfect foil for Ashlyn’s charming and ebullient personality. They were complete opposites in many ways but they quickly found a respect for each other and grew to genuinely enjoy each other’s company. Which was good because they spent twelve straight days together. When they weren’t sitting side by side in the broadcast booth, calling the game, they were travelling, by train mostly, to the next city together. 

The two broadcast teams alternated days, so Team Two travelled on the days that Team One called two games, and vice versa. They were just following the schedule of the games. Ashlyn and Birgit, Team Two, started a day after Sylvia and Caroline, on Monday July 14th in Stuttgart which was in the South West corner of the host cities. Team One had started with the first two matches of the tournament, on Sunday July 13th, up in Wolfsburg in the North East corner of the host cities. They covered all of the group stage games for groups A and C while Ashlyn and Birgit covered groups B and D. Two of the six stadiums, in Wolfsburg and Jena, were smaller, with a capacity in the 30,000 range. Two were much bigger, Stuttgart and Munich, where they filled 70-75,000 seats. And then there were two in the middle, Frankfurt and Dusseldorf with 53,000 seat stadiums. Ashlyn almost shit her pants when she called her very first game ever at that level. 70,000 screaming fans filled the Mercedes-Benz Arena in Stuttgart where she and Birgit Prinz worked the England v Netherlands game at 5pm. Birgit had called lots of games before, not quite to this level, but she knew what she was doing and was fairly unflappable. She was a soothing balm to the blonde’s ragged nerves as Ashlyn sat stunned by the sheer volume of noise that filled the stadium. She really thought she might pass out from it and the jet lag and the anxiety she felt. Sitting at a studio desk and giving your opinion and an occasional funny or poignant comment every so often was a completely different gig than actually calling a live game. She had called a few NWSL games before and had done a very good job. But this...this was a whole different animal.

“You good, hot shot?” Birgit asked in her German accented English.

That had been how she greeted Ashlyn ever since their first meeting that morning. She didn’t mean it as an insult or even as a tease. It was just a descriptive term that pretty accurately described Ashlyn Harris the goalkeeper and women’s soccer expert. The keeper was flashy and outspoken and brash, compared to her German and even Swedish counterparts. They didn’t mind, they actually kind of enjoyed it. But Birgit called em like she saw em, and Ashlyn Harris was a hot shot. Plus, the former striker thought all goalkeepers, even former ones, were cocky and full of themselves. Again, not in a judgmental way, just in a very matter-of-fact way. Before very long though, hot shot became more of a term of endearment once the German got to know the brash on the outside but warm and fuzzy on the inside American.

“God, I hope so” Ashlyn swallowed hard and glanced at her comrade. 

“You’ll be fine” Birgit grinned and patted Ashlyn on the shoulder. “Remember, less is more sometimes. They won’t know you’re an idiot unless you tell them so” she chuckled.

Just as both teams had done, Ashlyn settled into the game after about fifteen minutes or so. Her breathing came back to normal and the ringing in her ears stopped. She checked her phone at halftime, mostly out of habit and because she was still a little nervous.

Aliebe: You’re doing such a great job!  
Aliebe: I’m serious, I wouldn’t lie to you babe.  
Aliebe: And you look smoking hot...why are you so far away and looking like that? Mean. Just kidding. About the mean, not the hot. Lol.  
Aliebe: Call me when you can, or when you want to. Keep kicking ass! Love you babe. Xxooxxoo  
Aliebe: p.s. Nice necklace.

Germany was six hours ahead of Eastern time so it had been 11am in Boston when the game kicked off. Ashlyn wondered who her wife was watching the live stream with. She was guessing maybe Whitney, depending on how baby Becca was doing. She was yanked out of her peaceful thoughts of her wife and best friend when the producer came over to give her some constructive criticism and tweak a couple of things with her microphone. Apparently the Taurus the bull necklace that hung down across her chest was causing some sort of problem with her mic placement. She was ready to fight to keep the carefully chosen and beloved piece of jewelry on but the producer never even mentioned removing it. He simply moved the microphone an inch higher up on the lapel of her blazer and gave her an encouraging smile.

What Ashlyn didn’t know was that everyone at The Academy was tuned into the live stream of the game too. Kick-off was when they were just finishing up their first soccer session of the day but they were able to watch almost the entire second half during lunch. After two days, Jane Sheldrick found a way to get the livestream fed into the big screen tv in the main building so everybody could watch during lunch time and even during their elective session if they chose to, although nobody at the camp encouraged that. The keeper was buoyed by the dozens of loving and teasing tweets and text messages she received. She took some time to read them while she was eating between the two games that first day.

“See, that wasn’t so bad” Birgit patted her arm as she walked up to the keeper during their dinner break. “Ah, a good way to feel better” she nodded knowingly as she glanced over Ashlyn’s shoulder and saw her smiling and reading messages. “I’ll leave you to it” she patted her again and moved to the next table over in the small room next to the broadcast booth that they used to get ready and to try and relax.

Ashlyn wanted to invite her to join her, but she knew she needed some loving from friends and family to help keep her confidence up. She also knew that Birgit understood. 

The second game, Italy v Spain, had gone much better for the blonde. She really truly had settled down and, with some renewed confidence, began to enjoy the noisy stadium with the incredibly passionate fans all shouting in a language she didn’t understand. By the time Spain had won, the keeper felt almost like herself again. She knew she’d be better in two days’ time when they called their next two games from Frankfurt. After the game she went and had two strong German beers with Birgit and most of the rest of the production crew before heading back to the hotel for the night. It was almost 1am her time which, she hoped, would be the perfect time to Facetime with the kids at home.

“Hi honey!” Ali’s voice rang out cheerfully as her face came into view on the keeper’s phone. “Hey you guys, look who it is” she moved over to the couch in the front living room and plopped down into the corner of it so the kids could all pile in around her and see their mama. Ashlyn could hear Deb’s chuckle in the background as she helped wrangle everybody into place.

“Hi guys! It’s so good to see all your beautiful bums!” she teased and made them all giggle. “I mean beautiful faces, definitely faces” she winked and laughed along with them. 

Drew didn’t miss a beat though. He jumped up and turned around and wiggled his bum at the iPad Ali was holding, anticipating the call from her wife. Soon they were all up and trying to do the same thing, with varying degrees of success. Dodge fell over immediately and Josie and Lily hipchecked each other accidentally and almost both ended up on Ali’s chest. All that mattered was that they were all laughing together. Nothing could have prepared Ashlyn for how much that meant to her in that moment. She was half a world away, in a foreign land where she didn’t speak the language and she had just gone through a pretty stressful working evening. But those little bums and faces and laughs gave her a boost of everything she didn’t even know she needed.

“Oh man is it good to see you guys” she grinned into her phone. “And you all look so good and clean. Did you just have bathtime?”

“Ah-huh” Drew nodded and spread his arms out wide.

“Are those your new spiderman jammers buddy?” Ashlyn asked, even though she could clearly see that they were.

“Yep” he beamed back at her.

“Uh oh, where’s Lily? Where’s my Lily girl?” she asked playfully.

“Mama!” Lily yelled back and giggled, sticking her arm straight up in the air and waving it.

“There she is. Can you guys see me ok?”

“Yeah, you’re good babe. I’ve got you on the iPad” Ali answered as she caught a falling Lily who was so excited that she had just launched herself Ali’s way. “Oof, it’s late there. Are you getting ready for bed too?”

“It is and I am. Do you guys want me to show you my hotel room?”

They spent about twenty minutes talking and asking questions about Ashlyn’s room and answering questions about their day before the keeper couldn’t help but yawn. Ali had everybody say goodnight and blow their mama kisses before blowing a kiss of her own and ending the call. She texted her wife to tell her to call her later if she wanted and was still awake. Or to try her in the morning if that was better for her. The brunette really wanted to talk to Ashlyn about the games and how she was feeling. It had broken her heart to see how nervous her keeper had been. She didn’t think anybody else would be able to tell, but Ali sure could.

Ashlyn’s next call was to Niki at the Academy. She wanted to check and see how Meg was doing at the highly competitive invitational session. The rest of the first 6 weeks were for any skill level, but week 4, the one they were in right now, was for invited soccer players only. Instead of the typical age 9 – 14 girls, the invitational session was for qualified girls ages 11 – 16. 

“You know, you’re going to get me in trouble” Niki answered the phone with a chuckle. “I walked away from the campfire for this...”

“Oh shit, sorry” Ashlyn winced at the realization. “I’m still working on the time difference in my head. My bad.”

“You did great today Ash, really great” the coach praised her sincerely.

“Thanks Nik” the keeper smiled into the phone. “I won’t keep you long, thanks for picking up. I owe you.”

“You don’t owe me anything knucklehead. What’s up?”

“I just want to know how Meg’s doing. I know she’s a good keeper, I taught her everything I know” she joked, trying to hide her nerves. “But this is her first time at a camp like this, you know, at this level.”

“I get it. She’s doing good. She’s young, some of the girls this week are 16...”

“Did she get smoked in the scrimmage today?”

“A little bit, but it’s only the second day. When we have the next scrimmage on Wednesday that’ll be a better test.”

“Yeah, you’re right. Fuck I wish I was there for her this week...”

“Honestly, I think it’s better that you’re not. Not for this first one. She’s really good, not as good as you were I’m sure” they both chuckled, “but she needs to get her feet wet without you next to her for a change. We’ll learn a lot about her this week, and she’ll learn a ton about herself too.”

“Do you think I’m pushing her too hard, or holding her back or something?” Ashlyn tried to keep the worry out of her voice but it was useless.

“Relax Ash. No I don’t think any of that. You said it yourself, this is her first time at a camp at this level this week and it shows. But that’s good. It’s a real test for her and, not that you’re doing anything wrong at all, I think the fact that she’s doing it on her own is going to be really good for her.” She paused. “Have you talked to Ken yet?”

“No, I didn’t want to bother him, and I’m tired and...”

“Hey, it’s ok” Niki chuckled. “I get it. Wait til tomorrow when you’re more rested and situated to talk to the father-in-law. I’d do the same thing.”

“No, it’s not that” she chuckled with her friend. “I kind of want to wait until he’s seen her for the full session before I talk to him. I don’t want to influence him in any way...”

“She’s good Ash, you’re not wrong. At all. I can absolutely see her developing into a great goalkeeper. It’s not in your head.”

“Thanks...I hope you’re right” Ashlyn sighed. “And how’s she doing without Emma there?”

“Good. About half the kids this week have been here already, for at least one session, so she’s got friends. There are around 20 girls who are her age so she’s covered there too. I promise you, she’s ok.”

“I told her if she needed anything to talk to you or Syd and you’d help her...”

“Always Ash, like she was my own. Don’t worry. I swear she’s doing good. I’ll try and get something on video tomorrow and send it to you, ok?”

“Oh that’d be awesome Nik! You’re the fucking best.”

“I am and don’t you forget it. And for fuck’s sake, don’t forget to give my best to Dusseldorf when you get there. Damn, we had some good times there, didn’t we?”

“We sure did” Ashlyn chuckled and then yawned. “We sure as hell did.”

“Ok I’ve gotta get back. Jane’s giving me the stink eye...”

“Thanks Nik. Love you bud.”

//

The big old house kept running, even with Ashlyn in Germany for three weeks. Deb, as usual, was a godsend as she stepped in to help with her rambunctious and lovable grandkids. It didn’t take her long to get up to speed on the changes that had taken place with each child. There was no better way to learn that than by being with them every day and she had been looking forward to it. She didn’t move in again, but she was there every morning by 6:45am to help Ali with breakfast. She had enjoyed the less intense Grandma time that summer: watching Drew’s last t-ball game in June and babysitting a few evenings while Ali and Ashlyn were focused on finishing The Academy. But she was ready to step back in as a third parent for the next three weeks and Ali couldn’t have been more thankful. Not only was Deb going to help her while Ashlyn was away, but she was going to move in and be the Grandma in charge when Ali flew to meet Ashlyn in Germany for the last eleven days of her EUROs gig. Tammye and Carol were coming up to stay at the big old house while Ali was gone and Ken and Vicki, mostly Vicki, were ready to help whenever necessary. Ali and Ashlyn had never been away for so long before and they were understandably nervous. But they both remembered the promise they had made to each other to continue making time for their relationship and were determined to keep it. They hadn’t been on a real vacation together since they went to Key West while Ashlyn was pregnant with the twins, 2-1/2 years ago. They hadn’t been away for a long weekend since Carm & Kacey’s wedding last June. They were due. They had toyed with the idea of taking a trip for their ten-year wedding anniversary next year, celebrating their get-together anniversary instead of their wedding anniversary. But when the Germany trip came up they both realized they had to take advantage of it while they could.

But in the time before Ali left to meet her wife overseas, they had a visitor come and stay with them in Gloucester.

“Mom!” Meg called out when she saw her mother standing next to Coach Cross at the end of the fourth week of The Academy. It was Thursday afternoon and everybody who had attended the more intense, invitational session was saying their goodbyes and getting into their parents’ cars in the parking lot. “You’re here!” she grinned as she trotted over and gave her a hug.

“Hi baby girl” Hannah hugged her and kissed the top of her head. “Oh, you’re all sweaty” she chuckled, never a fan of that in any athlete no matter who they were. At least she didn’t recoil like she used to. Instead, she casually wiped her hands on her shorts and kept her arm around her sweaty daughter anyway.

“Yeah, sorry” Meg shrugged. “We just had the final scrimmage.”

“Did you have fun?”

“Yeah, this week was awesome. I mean, it was really different and a lot harder, but it was so cool” she enthused, looking from her mother to Niki and back again. 

Hannah had flown up for the weekend, rented a car and would be driving Meg back to the big old house where they would both stay until the 13-year old had to be back at camp Sunday morning. Hannah had never gone for more than a month, usually the month of August when Meg came up to Gloucester, without seeing her daughter and she wasn’t going to start that summer. Money was no object so there was no reason not to do it. She had tried to get Meg to stay with her in Boston at a fancy hotel and have a girls’ weekend together. But Meg had mustered up her courage and told her mother that she’d rather stay at the house she had come to know as her second home. It hadn’t occurred to the girl that her mother might not feel as comfortable there as she did. But, as she had proven in the past, Hannah was willing to sacrifice for her daughter. She had stayed at the big old house several times before but Ashlyn had always been there. This would be the first time she would stay there without her ex-girlfriend’s protection. Not that Hannah really thought Ali would change her behavior or treat her any differently without Ashlyn around. But it was just a situation that Hannah wouldn’t have minded avoiding altogether if she could have.

“You can have this pull-out or the one in Ashlyn’s studio” Ali offered the tall redhead as they stood in Meg’s third-floor bedroom. Meg was in the shower while the brunette got Hannah settled. “Totally up to you and how much together time you want” she grinned.

“Very funny” Hannah rolled her eyes playfully. “I’d better take the studio, just to be safe.”

There was a ruckus they could both hear clearly, all the way from the first floor and Ali put the clean bedding and towels on the arm of the sleeper sofa in the studio before moving quickly towards the door.

“Ummm, I’ll be back to make that up for you in a few minutes...” she looked anxiously towards the stairs.

“Just go ahead, I can do it” Hannah stepped out of her way. “I don’t need you to wait on me Ali. You’ve got enough going on. I’m just fine” she smiled again.

“Ok, well, the kids aren’t allowed up here without one of us so you can leave the bed down or however you like it...just make yourself at home” she tossed over her shoulder as she made her way down the stairs.

They all shared a surprisingly nice three nights together. Deb was a wonderful buffer, as always, but both Ali and Hannah wondered if they actually needed one. Neither was too eager to find out, but they both felt like they had made their peace with the other. And Ali even found the strength to swallow the inappropriate comments the redhead had made to her wife earlier in the year when they had been trying to figure out Meg’s schedule for this summer. Hadn’t everyone said or done things they regretted after too much wine? Hannah and Meg went to the beach both Friday and Saturday afternoons and seemed to have a good time together. Emma Donaldson joined them Friday, which Hannah loved because it gave her a chance to spend some time with the girl who had become such an important part of her daughter’s life. She trusted Ashlyn and her assessment and description of the girl and her friendship with Meg, but it was still nice to get her own eyes on the situation for a change. Julie Donaldson must have been thinking the same thing because when the three walked back up from the beach she was conveniently standing in the driveway of the big old house talking with Ali and Josie.

“Here they are now” Ali winked at Julie before turning her attention to Hannah, Meg and Emma. “Hannah, I can’t believe it’s true, but Julie was just telling me that you guys have never officially met...”

“It’s true” Hannah pulled the long sleeve button up shirt she had thrown over her bathing suit closed in front of her as she approached. “Not even unofficially” she cocked her head and tried to think. “Well, maybe once over a Facetime call...”

“Oh that’s right” Julie agreed with a chuckle. “I forgot about that. I also think I wasn’t completely dressed at the time so I’m not counting it” she laughed and both Ali and Hannah joined her.

Emma rolled her eyes and leaned into Meg as she blushed.

“Mooooommm” she whined.

“Hannah, this is Julie, the best neighbor anybody could ever hope for” Ali grinned at the woman who had really become a good friend to both she and Ashlyn over the years. “And Julie, this is Hannah, Meg’s mom. I’ve gotta get the twins up, sorry to introduce and run” she smiled sheepishly as she tried to get Josie to come into the house with her.

Josie didn’t want to go. She wanted to stay there and watch Hannah. That was her favorite pastime that weekend – watching Hannah. Ali knew it was the red hair and the height and the newness of the beautiful woman that had her daughter’s attention. Josie had met her a couple of times before but she wasn’t able to remember her until last year when Hannah came to visit them in the rental beach house in Los Angeles when Ashlyn was covering the Olympics. There weren’t a lot of other redheads in Josie’s life and the little girl reacted the same way whenever she saw someone else with her color hair. She stared and watched and studied.

“I’ve got her” Julie nodded at Josie. “Go ahead Al.”

It was sort of funny looking at the two completely opposite women standing there talking. They had very little in common and probably wouldn’t ever find themselves talking to each other if not for the friendship of their daughters, unless Hannah needed a nurse or Julie needed an event planner. They chatted for about ten minutes while the teenagers waited impatiently.

“If you’re so bored you can go take a shower and get ready for dinner Em” Julie suggested. “Your dad will be home soon.

“But mom...” Emma looked from Meg to her mom to Hannah and then back to her mom. “Can we go to the movies tonight?” she glanced at Meg again.

“No honey” Julie shook her head. “Meg’s mom came all the way up to spend the weekend with her and that doesn’t include you two going to the movies.”

“But...”

“No buts Em. You’ve spent more time with Meg than anybody else has this summer...”

“But not this week” Emma negotiated. “Pleeeassse?”

“No. Now that’s enough” Julie’s voice told her 14-year old daughter that they were done discussing it. “Go get cleaned up so we can leave when dad gets home.”

They watched as Emma sulked the whole way to her own backdoor and disappeared into the house.

“I’m gonna shower too” Meg said glumly as she turned and went into the house.

“Ahh, nothing like feeling wanted, is there?” Hannah sighed and grinned at Julie. “I don’t want to mess up any plans or anything, but we’re just going to watch a movie tonight anyway. I know Emma has allergies, but if you think she could make it through a movie without too much trouble she’s welcome to join us” Hannah offered. “Ashlyn’s told me that they put the dogs in one of the other rooms so they’re not all over Emma. I’m sure Ali wouldn’t mind...”

“Oh, you’re so sweet. I don’t know. They’ll be together all week again at camp, it’s really not that big a deal” Julie tried to make sure Hannah didn’t feel obligated.

“I know, I guess it’s just nice to see the person Meg talks so much about all the time, you know? Get to know her a little bit too. But no pressure. I think we’re going to the beach again tomorrow afternoon and she’s welcome to join again.”

Neil Donaldson pulled into the driveway a few minutes later and Julie made the introductions. The three adults chatted for a few minutes, Josie watching from Neil’s arms, still always happiest to be held by the closest available male. Neil knew from experience that he would probably have to walk Josie into the mudroom before she would let go of him so he was surprised when she reached for Hannah as they ended their conversation and the Donaldsons started to talk about getting ready for dinner. Both Neil and Julie looked on with curiosity as Hannah took the 4-1/2 year old into her arms and grinned at her. Josie’s face was full of wonder as she stared back at the tall redhead.

“Oh, I was just coming out to get her” Ali said from just outside the mudroom door.

“It’s ok” Hannah smiled at Ali and then tickled Josie and made her giggle. “I’ve got her.”

Saturday night Ali was tidying up the kitchen when Hannah walked in with a couple of sippy cups from the front living room. It was 9:30pm and they had all gone to the Breakers game that evening, Emma and Deb included. Ali had just gotten everybody into bed and had almost finished the nightly clean-up. Deb had just left for the night. The brunette had so far avoided the front living room because Hannah and Meg were in there watching one of the teen’s shows and enjoying their last night together. 

“Oh, thanks” Ali took the cups from her and dumped what little was left in them into the sink and rinsed them out. “I was trying to leave you guys alone. If you want a cleaner room you should move into the family room now” she chuckled.

“She’s asleep” Hannah giggled and motioned over her shoulder towards the front of the house.

“No way!”

“Way” the redhead nodded and grinned.

“They work them so hard at camp, especially the tough week she was just at. I remember falling asleep at the drop of a hat when I was her age and doing the camps and tournaments. All I wanted to do was eat and sleep when I wasn’t on the pitch” Ali offered as she washed the sippy cups and put them in the drying rack next to the sink.

“She’s really serious about soccer now” Hannah leaned against the counter by the kitchen door, trying to stay out of Ali’s way. “I’m still getting used to it.”

“Well, from what I hear and the little that I’ve seen, she’s really good. My dad just raved about how well she did this week” Ali dried her hands and turned to face Hannah. “I’m having some wine, do you want some?”

“Yes, please” Hannah’s face lit up as she moved to where the wine glasses were kept. “I’ll get the glasses. White or red?”

“I’m having white, it’s too hot for red tonight...for me anyway” the brunette chuckled as she opened the refrigerator. “How about you?”

“Same” Hannah laughed as she carried two white wine glasses over to the coffee table in the family room and took a seat on the couch.

Ali joined her in a minute with a box of sea-salted, chocolate-covered caramels and the chilled bottle of wine. “Just in case the wine makes me want chocolate” she put the box, half dark chocolate and half milk chocolate, on the coffee table as she poured the first glass of wine. “Not that that ever happens” she joked and sat down.

It was a funny feeling to be sitting on that couch with Hannah instead of Ashlyn. The redhead was even in Ashlyn’s position, with her back to the wall and windows, body turned sideways to face Ali and the rest of the room. Hannah had been great the past two days. Even Deb commented on it when she and Ali had been alone. The brunette had long ago given up trying to figure out any motivations or explanations for Hannah’s behavior. She had just learned to appreciate the times when she was pleasant and cooperative, which, honestly, had been most of the times over the past several years. The latest dust-up with Ashlyn about Meg’s schedule this summer notwithstanding. The two women watched the end of one and the beginning of another episode of “Behind Mansion Walls’ that was airing in a marathon on cable tv. It was one of the few shows that they both loved because it mixed true crime with rich people’s lives. They were both relaxed and comfortable, maybe it was the wine, or the knowledge that all of the children in their care had enjoyed a great afternoon and evening and were now snuggled safely in bed. Or at least asleep in Meg’s case. It was rare for these two to spend extended amounts of time alone together and there was certainly no need for it tonight. There were three tvs in the house and Ali could have gone up to her bedroom at any point to watch the one in there, but she didn’t. Neither of them made any attempt to run away. 

“So, I’d better say this before I have too much wine and mess it up” Hannah started with a shy chuckle.

Ali felt her stomach flip flop as she thought, ‘I knew it was too good to be true’, sighed quietly and turned her attention to the redhead.

“What’s up?”

“Nothing. I mean...nothing’s wrong or anything” Hannah couldn’t believe how nervous she was.

“Ok...”

“I just wanted to thank you for always being so good to my girl” Hannah finally got the words out, eyes carefully watching Ali’s face for her reaction. She wasn’t sure how this was going to go over. “Meg tells me all the things you do for her and say to her and help her with...I don’t mean, like I’m interrogating her or she’s reporting back to me or anything...” she said quickly to make sure Ali didn’t think the worst of her. “Fuck” she groaned and rolled her eyes as she blushed a little bit. “Not that I think you would think that...”

“Hannah, it’s ok” Ali took pity on her. “I know what you mean” she smiled without forcing herself to, which surprised her a little bit.

“Oh thank God” she chuckled and took another sip of wine. They were each on their second glass but not drunk at all. They were just feeling comfortable and relaxed. “A lot of really good, nice people in your position would be nice and good to her because they loved Ash. And that would be it, and that would be enough, don’t get me wrong.” She waited a beat to make sure she got her words right before continuing. “But I know you love Meg and, well...that means so much to me Ali. I can’t even really describe it.”

“I have a pretty good idea” Ali smiled again. “It’s not quite the same, but all you have to do is be nice to one of my kids and you’ve got a fan in me for life” she chuckled.

“Exactly!” Hannah laughed softly and looked relieved. “There’s no faster way to get into my good graces than to be nice to my baby girl. That’s absolutely right” she agreed with a nod and let the nice moment of understanding settle around them for a minute. “But you’ve gone beyond that with her and she knows it. She can feel it.” The redhead sucked in a breath before continuing, her nerves rising up again. “She asked me once why you love her more than Dev does” she dropped her eyes, embarrassed by her admission.

“Wow” Ali exhaled without meaning to. “I mean, that’s not really a fair fight though, right? Dev’s older and he comes from a culture that has...limited views, sometimes, on how to raise and educate girls.”

“It’s ok Ali” Hannah chuckled and shook her head. “You can say he’s not great with kids, because he’s not.”

“Well there are lots of ways to show you love somebody, and taking care of their needs by feeding, clothing and housing them sure is a good one in my book.” Ali wanted to finish her thought. She wasn’t trying to diss Dev. “But if I was a young girl I’d probably pick me over Dev too” she shrugged her shoulders.

“Man you really do suck at taking a compliment, don’t you?” she laughed again.

Ali blushed and giggled a little bit self-consciously.

“I’ve been told” she looked up bashfully. “Sorry.”

“I always knew you’d be good with her, and kids in general. That’s part of why I never worried about Meg coming here. Nothing against Ash” she added quickly. “But” she shrugged, “the two of you together are a good bet to handle anything she could throw at you.”

“Ash is so great with her though...” Ali started to defend her wife but Hannah interrupted her.

“This has nothing to do with her” the redhead shook her head and then tilted it to make sure Ali knew this was important. “Ashlyn is a wonderful mother and step-mother and that has never been up for debate, at least not in my mind. We wouldn’t be sitting here today having this conversation if I had any doubts about her parenting skills.”

“Good” Ali nodded, happy to hear the woman she had such a difficult history with say something so important with such conviction.

“I feel like it’s going to take all three of us these next few years. I mean, let’s face it, I’m on the way out in the best buddy competition” she tried to laugh it off but Ali could see how pained the idea made her. “She’s probably going to keep coming to you guys, one or the other of you, to answer questions and help her figure things out. Just like she did with the tampons.”

Both women blushed and were quiet for a minute. They had never actually spoken about it before. Ashlyn and Hannah had discussed it and then the keeper had told Ali that everything was cool.

“Yeah, geez, I hope it was ok that I did that” Ali started nervously. “I mean, I know Ash said you were ok with it but...”

“Jesus, yes. I felt like an asshole for not thinking of that myself and I hated you for, like, a week” she giggled. “But it worked and that’s exactly what I’m talking about. If you hadn’t done that for her she would have been miserable about not being able to go to the beach and who knows what else. It was a big fucking deal Ali and you were great. Thank you.” She reached over and touched the brunette’s knee. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome” she smiled sincerely. “I’d do anything for her. She’s always welcome here and I miss her when she’s gone” she shrugged. “Who knew we’d find ourselves here ten years later?”

They both laughed, neither willing to risk the good feelings between them by putting any words to it for a few minutes.

“And thank you for letting Josie stare at you like some sort of circus freak” Ali chuckled. “I’m sorry about that, but she’s just mesmerized by you. I think she thought Meg and her red hair was amazing enough, but then you come here with all your grown-up red hair and tallness and everything and her little head is just spinning.”

“Aw, she’s adorable. She can stare all she wants. I remember how fixated Meg was on ‘Brave’ and ‘The Little Mermaid’ because they both looked like her, well, except for the mermaid tail” she giggled. “I get it.”

“I’ll have to make sure she doesn’t tuck herself into your suitcase before you leave in the morning” Ali joked as she finished her wine and stood up.

“Ha! She’s smart enough too isn’t she?”

“She definitely is” Ali agreed and paused for a few seconds. “As much as I’d love to have another glass of wine, I’ve got to try and watch that other soccer game from yesterday before I fall asleep tonight.”

“Wow, are you watching all of the games she’s doing?” Hannah’s eyes went wide. She knew Ali loved soccer but two soccer games every other day while working full-time and taking care of four little kids was a lot. “That’s impressive.”

“Yeah” Ali shrugged. “Well, it’s important to her. Also there’s the fact that I’m her agent and I really should be watching them in real time...” she made an eek face.

“Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me” Hannah laughed.

As Ali climbed the backstairs she thought to herself that Hannah’s statement might actually be true for the very first time ever. She would never fully trust her, but that had been the most honest and heartfelt conversation they had ever had. And that was good enough.


	29. Munich

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut warning

Ashlyn waited as patiently as possible in the Munich airport but she was so excited that she felt like her head might just pop right off of her body. It was Germany’s second-busiest airport and that Friday morning it was packed with commuters and vacationers getting away early for a long weekend and a million other people clogging up every walkway and concourse. The keeper had just completed the full trip around all six of the venues for the Group stages of the EUROs tournament. Broadcast Team Two had started in Stuttgart, then moved North to Frankfurt, then farther North and West to Dusseldorf. They travelled one day and then called two games the next day. Rinse and repeat and enjoy the gorgeous German countryside along the way. After Dusseldorf they took a train East and a tiny bit North to get to Wolfsburg, then moved a little farther East and a good distance South to Jana and finally due South all the way down to Munich. It had been an amazing eleven days that Ashlyn would never forget. But today, Friday July 25th, was the day she had been dreaming of every night as she slept alone in one hotel room after another. Ali’s overnight flight had landed at 7:05am and the keeper was scanning the crowd moving toward the baggage claim area, looking for any sight of her beautiful brunette. 

She thought back to all the times Ali had been waiting for her at the airport and smiled. The brunette always used to park and come right into the airport to welcome her home. Then they would walk back to the truck, arm-in-arm, taking their time and enjoying the nearness of each other. That sweet tradition had certainly changed quickly. Having kids made that scenario more difficult and then, eventually, flat out impossible. The blonde smiled broadly as she thought back to the very first time Ali had greeted her at the airport in Boston. They had only been together for a few weeks and Ashlyn’s long-planned vacation to Florida had separated them for ten whole days and they both felt like they were going to die. Oh the drama of their intense, new love. The keeper remembered the way her heart pounded when she saw Ali below her, from her vantage point at the top of the escalator. The brunette had run across the baggage claim area and jumped into Ashlyn’s arms, right at the foot of the escalator. They hugged and kissed as the blonde carried her new girlfriend farther away so they weren’t blocking everybody else. It had been a sweet, romantic, desperate moment that Ashlyn hoped she would never forget. That feeling...the butterflies in her stomach, the pounding in her heart, the blood rushing in her ears as the anticipation kept building and building and building...she felt the same things that morning in the Munich airport and she could not stop smiling.

“Ali!!” she stood on her tip toes and waved her arm up high above her head as she yelled to her wife. “Ali!!”

The brunette was wearing comfortable clothes so she could, hopefully, sleep on the flight. She wore sneakers, dark grey joggers, a black t-shirt and a lightweight fuchsia zip-up sweatshirt. Her hair was up in a bun and she had her glasses on. She looked perfect, absolutely perfect. She slowed and started trying to locate the person whose voice she knew and loved so much. It only took her a few seconds before she zeroed in on her gorgeous keeper and made her way over to her, locking eyes with her and grinning the whole time. Both the nose-crinkle and the dimple were on full display. The blonde was dressed similarly, knowing her wife would probably want to at least relax if not go back to sleep for a few hours that morning. It took everything Ashlyn had to wait where she was, a carefully chosen, slightly out of the way, nook near some payphones that nobody ever used anymore.

“Ashlyn” the brunette breathed out as she dropped her carry-on and purse and threw both arms around her wife’s neck.

They hugged for several minutes, neither willing to let the other go. Their lips found cheeks and settled into necks as they held each other tightly, Ashlyn’s strong arms around Ali’s waist.

“Oh my God did I miss you” Ashlyn whispered when they finally pulled apart far enough to look at each other’s faces. “I love you so much” she kissed her wife’s lips tenderly and tried not to cry.

“Me too, babe” Ali mumbled against her keeper’s soft lips. “Me too.”

They hugged again and stayed in their loving embrace until the luggage finally started to come out on the carousel across the room behind them. Even then they were slow to move and separate their bodies, finally walking over arm-in-arm and holding each other close as they watched for Ali’s suitcase. For the twenty minutes that they stood and hugged and then waited for the baggage carousel, nobody else existed. Not even in that jampacked, extremely busy airport. It was just the two of them as it had been back in early 2016, the first time they had reunited at an airport. It felt incredible.

They went back to Ashlyn’s hotel and took a nap. Ali had only gotten about four hours of sleep on the flight and didn’t want to totally crash later in the afternoon or evening so they hopped back into the car service Ashlyn had hired for the airport pick-up and went to bed. They stripped off their clothes but had no intentions of having sex just yet. They just wanted to be close and feel all of each other as they snuggled up and fell asleep. Sleeping naked was something they missed a lot and they took advantage of every chance they got to do it. It had been close to 8:30am when they started their nap and nearly 11am when Ali woke up, confused momentarily by her surroundings and the strange sounds and smells of the hotel room. It was a beautiful room, it just didn’t smell or sound like their bedroom at home, which is where she thought she was at first. 

She was in one of her usual spots, curled into her wife’s left side with her leg thrown across Ashlyn’s hips and her arm across her chest. She blinked her eyes a few times and remembered where they were. The realization flooded her system with excitement and her face broke into a smile in response. Ali was excited to see Ashlyn, first and foremost, but she was just as excited to get out and explore Germany with the love of her life too. She looked up at her keeper, still asleep, and studied the side of her face and head. She saw the part of her cheek that formed the dimple she loved so much, and her beautiful cheekbone and jawline. The soft pink lips practically called out to her to kiss them but she selfishly wanted to watch Ashlyn in repose for just a few minutes first. She let her eyes wander to her ear and the short, messy hair that she had slept on all night. Ali smiled at the sight and thought about how much she wanted to run her hands through it and scratch at the back of her wife’s neck. She took a minute and followed the almost nine-year old scar that ran horizontally across the side of her head, an inch above her left ear. The brunette flashed back to the grisly collision Ashlyn’s head had had with the Houston Dash player’s cleat as they both fought for a loose ball. Ashlyn had gotten to the ball first, safely punching it away, but Ubogagu’s boot had smashed into the left side of her face and knocked her out cold. God that had been terrifying to watch, especially so far from Houston. She remembered feeling helpless, desperate and fearful in equal measure as she waited for her keeper to regain consciousness. And now all that was left of that incident was a pale, thin, practically invisible scar that was three inches long. 

Ali kissed the tip of her finger and placed it gently on the scar, careful not to wake Ashlyn up. But the keeper stirred, just a little, and Ali pulled her finger back. As she brought her arm back down to her wife’s chest, she accidentally dragged the underside of her upper arm across Ashlyn’s left nipple. She held in a slight gasp when she felt how stiff the beautiful, pink nub was. Maybe the blonde was cold or maybe she was having some sort of sexy dream. Ali didn’t know and she didn’t really care. As soon as she felt that hardening nipple her whole demeanor changed. Up until that second the most pressing want she felt was to have a big cup of very strong coffee. But not anymore. That could wait. Her most pressing want was now to press her face between Ashlyn’s legs and she moaned softly at the thought. Her keeper had always been good about being woken up for sex. It didn’t happen very often anymore though because they were both always so tired by the time they fell asleep that they would rather sleep than have sex most times in that scenario. But it had been eleven long days since she had fucked her wife and sent her off to Germany with some good memories to keep her warm at night. 

The brunette leaned over and gave a broad lick to that teasing nipple, flattening her tongue out and slowly moving it across the pink bud. She moved her hand to Ashlyn’s right breast and slowly started to fondle it, avoiding the nipple for the time being. Ali felt her excitement level ratchet up about four notches and started to trace around the outside of her wife’s breast with the tip of her hot tongue. Ashlyn stirred again and turned her head away to the other side of the pillow, sleepily moving her left arm along Ali’s bare back and letting it rest on her hip. The brunette loved the weight of her wife’s arm on her skin and moaned again when she finally took her nipple all the way into her mouth. She sucked gently on it and felt it stiffen even more when she stroked it with her tongue. She cupped the other breast with her left hand and began massaging and kneading it, letting her thumb and forefinger lightly pinch the nipple there.

“Mmmmmmmm...” Ashlyn moaned and turned her head back over towards the middle of the bed.

Ali replaced her mouth with her right hand, still slowly working both breasts up, and slid her body down the blonde’s left leg until her mouth could reach her neatly trimmed curls. She pressed a warm kiss to Ashlyn’s clit, still asleep and not ready for much else yet. The brunette paused for a few seconds, considering an idea that had just formed in her lust-filled, caffeine-deprived brain. She smirked to herself and knelt next to her wife’s left hip, only her right hand still touching the sexy blonde. Ali was very turned on and she reached down between her own legs to feel how wet she was and spread her own pussy lips apart. She sucked in a breath as a wave of passion met her fingers. Fuck it. She was doing it.

Ali pushed the covers down past her wife’s knees and then straddled her torso backwards, careful to keep her body up and off of hers until she was ready. The brunette was on her hands and knees, facing the foot of the bed, and she slowly started backing up towards the head of the bed, careful not to ruin everything by kicking her sleeping beauty in the face as she got into position. She ran her hand down across Ashlyn’s short hairs so her fingers were between her thighs and ghosting against her center. Ali gently moved one of her keeper’s legs out to the side and then lowered herself down so her breasts pressed into her lower abs. She felt Ashlyn stir again and the bed moved a little too. She backed up a little farther, letting her back straighten out as she lowered her stomach down onto her wife’s body. The brunette heard Ashlyn’s breathing change and suck in a breath just as Ali lowered her mouth down onto her clit.

“Ali?” the keeper croaked out in her sleepy voice as her hands moved to the brunette’s legs on either side of her torso. It was almost another full minute before she spoke again, enjoying the amazing sensation of Ali’s mouth and tongue on her clit. She finally opened her eyes and almost passed out when she took in the gorgeous sight in front of her. “Oh fuck yes...” she groaned, recovering quickly.

“Morning babe” Ali purred as she wrapped her arms around both of her wife’s strong thighs and pulled them up. She tried to look over her shoulder but all she could see was her own ass. “I’m hungry for breakfast and I thought you might be too...” her words dripped with the desire she felt coursing through her body.

“Is this a dream?” Ashlyn asked weakly, still reeling from the wake-up call and the priceless gift that was waiting just above her chest for her. “If it is, please don’t wake me up” she pleaded, her voice thick and raspy with both sleep and want. “Jesus” she moaned when she felt Ali’s tongue travel all the way to the bottom of her opening and then back to her clit. 

The keeper grabbed Ali’s hips and pulled her down onto her face, wasting no time. The brunette was so wet she was dripping when Ashlyn finally pressed her face into her favorite place in the whole world. She eagerly licked up all of the juices there and then began exploring Ali’s pussy with licks and sucks and flicks.

“Oh yeah...fuck yeah...” Ali moaned into her wife’s clit. The reverberations made the blonde’s hips buck up and Ali chuckle low in her throat.

They were both looking forward to breaking their habit of starting all sexcapades with a fast orgasm for each of them, just in case that was all they would have time for. On this vacation, at least, they were going to take their time and tease and have fun without having to worry about anything else. But that morning, in the midst of trying to scratch an eleven-day itch, the plan went out the window and they found themselves quickly devouring each other. They were loud and sloppy as they licked and sucked each other towards ecstasy. Their moans and groans and expletives filled the room and probably the hallway too, but they didn’t fucking care. Just like at the airport, there was nobody in the world but the two of them that morning. They didn’t care who heard what as they added their fingers to the mix. Ali’s pumped in and out of her keeper’s core while her tongue worked up her clit. Ashlyn’s scratched at her wife’s dark curls before finding her clit and rubbing slow circles around it while she plunged her tongue inside the brunette over and over again.

Ali was closer to her release than Ashlyn was and she worked hard to get the blonde caught up to her. She stopped thrusting and began curling her two fingers up into Ashlyn’s g-spot while she sucked hard on her clit.

“Fucking hell” the blonde grunted. “Shit that’s so good baby...don’t stop, I’m almost there...”

Ali had no intention of stopping. Instead, she moved her mouth over to the sensitive skin of Ashlyn’s inner thigh and began nipping and licking at it while her other hand started to rub her aching clit hard and fast.

“Come for me, sexy” she urged in a dark, hungry voice as she felt Ashlyn’s leg tremble.

The keeper knew she was going to come any minute so she switched it up and pushed two fingers into her wife’s pulsing center, temporarily losing her mind at how wet Ali was for her. She really wanted to stop and lick her fingers and every other ounce of passion that had dripped out of Ali’s pussy, but there wasn’t time. She was doing her best to hold off her own orgasm while she went back to work on her beautiful brunette. Ashlyn started thrusting fast and hard while she increased the pace and strength of her other hand on Ali’s swollen clit.

“God...fuck...” she husked out. “I’m there baby...I’m coming!” Ashlyn yelled and then bit down on the back of Ali’s upper thigh as her body started to convulse and shake through her orgasm. “Come with me Aliiiiii!!”

It could have been the bite to the back of her thigh, or the guttural moan and yell, or those fucking magical fingers of Ashlyn’s filling her up and rubbing her just right. Ali didn’t know what it was that pushed her over the edge and she didn’t fucking care. She just enjoyed the ride, cursing and bucking and twitching as she came hard.

“Jesus fucking Christ!!! Ashlyn!!! Yessssssss!!!”

Their bodies rocked and shook and flailed together for several minutes as they tried to control their arms and hold onto one another, still wanting to be as close as possible, even as their orgasms swept over them.

“Holy shit” Ashlyn panted out as they started to catch their breath, bodies still twitching as one more spasm hit them, and chests heaving as they tried to breathe. “Oh my God Al...fuck.”

As soon as Ashlyn got control of them, she moved her hands to her wife’s incredible ass which was in her absolute favorite place of all time. She caressed Ali’s ass cheeks and slid her hands down her thick thighs and then moved them back up so she could hold her wife in place if she tried to climb off of her. Ashlyn wanted a few minutes with all of Ali open and exposed for her, right on her chest and in front of her grinning face. She marveled at how beautiful her pussy was, taking a minute to really look at it and appreciate all the folds and ripples and curves and soft edges. When she was younger she never understood why everybody got excited about Georgia O’Keeffe’s giant flower paintings. Ashlyn liked flowers more than most people but she just didn’t get it. Even when she was older and having a lot of sex in college and understood what the flowers meant and symbolized, she still didn’t really appreciate them or think they were that special. It wasn’t until she fell in love with the most beautiful woman in the world and saw her magnificent flower that she finally grasped what Georgia had been painting all those years. 

“Mmmmmmmm...” Ali hummed contentedly from her place down by Ashlyn’s thigh. “That was amazing babe. Thank you” she got out, her breath still hard to come by. 

“Best morning in Germany ever” Ashlyn chuckled as she leaned up and kissed the red mark where she had bitten her wife. She placed soft, gentle kisses to it before starting to lick Ali clean. “God I love you” she mumbled into Ali’s folds.

//

Ali didn’t let them linger that morning, and Ashlyn was so happy to have her there with her that she gladly followed along with whatever the brunette wanted to do. They showered as quickly and non-sexually as possible, although both women knew they were just going to be varying levels of turned on for the remainder of the day. Their morning scratch had been wonderful but it was like sticking your finger in the frosting of a seven-layer cake just to get a quick idea of what the whole thing would taste like. Then you wanted nothing more than to eat that cake for the rest of the damned day.

Germany in July and August was beautiful and Munich was no exception. The temperature at the end of July ranged from 65 to 75 degrees during the day, but usually mid to low 70s was the norm. It was summer but the humidity wasn’t too high and the heat was very comfortable. The weather varied from location to location, obviously, and the more Northern cities Ashlyn had travelled to, like Dusseldorf and Wolfsburg, had a different climate than Stuttgart and Munich down in the South of the country. When Ashlyn had played soccer in Germany in 2012 and 2013 she had played for Duisburg which was in the North West, North Rhine-Westphalia, region of the country, very close to Dusseldorf and not too far from Dortmund, where the championship game would be played in ten days’ time. The Bundesliga season started in late Summer and went until the end of Spring, with a few weeks’ break in the Winter. Niki Cross had signed a contract for two years, playing for FC Bayern in Munich, and she and Ashlyn had tried to get acclimated and settled into their new country. Thankfully, many Germans and most German businesses spoke at least a little bit of English. And that had saved Ashlyn because, try as she might, she could not get the hang of the German language. The two best friends spent as much time together as they could, even though their home cities were at exact opposite corners of the country. Munich was in the South East, Bavaria, region and the train between it and Dusseldorf took 5-1/2 hours. Duisburg was only a 30-minute drive North from the bigger and better-connected city of Dusseldorf. 

Ali’s year in Frankfurt had been way back in 2004 and 2005, from late August to June. She had been a struggling student so she didn’t have a lot of money to do much travelling. Her parents had paid for almost everything to get her there, with her scholarship to Penn State paving the way, and the brunette had refused to ask them for any extra money for luxuries or extravagances. As fucked up as she was, she still knew enough to be grateful and appreciative. Frankfurt was more centrally located North to South, but in the West, Hesse, region of Germany. It had been twenty years since Ali had last been in the land of some of her ancestors, and twelve years since Ashlyn had been in Germany last. That was a long time and many things had changed and were different. Most of Ashlyn’s memories were of being cold and spending a lot of time on trains travelling to and from Bundesliga games. There were great memories of drinking too much incredible German beer with Niki and various other teammates in some of the best biergartens and pubs in Dusseldorf and Munich. But she hadn’t been interested in doing a lot of sight-seeing, nor had she had a lot of time to explore much of the country outside of football stadiums. Ali’s experience had been much different for obvious reasons. She was a student and the whole point of being abroad and taking college courses was to learn about life, Germany, herself and her surroundings. The brunette had sweet memories of time spent with both Anna and Willem, the two students she had dated during her time in Frankfurt. They each showed Ali some of their favorite places in the city and surrounding countryside and she had absorbed the experiences like a sponge. Even if she hadn’t been sure how it might impact her life next week or next year, Ali dove in and tried to immerse herself in German culture. 

So when the couple was trying to plan out some sort of agenda for their time together in Deutschland it had been easy to let Ali take the lead. The ESPN broadcast schedule also helped narrow down a lot of choices for them. For example, there were three different game days that Ashlyn had to cover. They had just called the last group game in Munich the night before Ali arrived and would be calling two quarterfinal matches in Stuttgart on Sunday. Ashlyn had Friday and Saturday off, her only requirement was to be at the stadium by noon on Sunday for pre-game run-throughs and set-up. Then she had three days off before she had to be in Frankfurt for one of the two big semi-final games on Thursday July 31st. Then she had two days off before both Broadcast teams were required to be in Dortmund for the Final on Sunday August 3rd. All in all the couple had seven days off out of the ten days, with their eleventh day, Monday August 4th, being the day they flew back home. It was a pretty sweet set-up and both Ashlyn and Ali knew it and appreciated it. Ashlyn had worked her ass off to get to this point though. She and Birgit had travelled thousands of miles and called twelve games so far. They were expected to be the experts on the eight teams that comprised Group B and D in the tournament. Sylvia and Caroline were responsible for Groups A and C in the same way. So there was no more homework to do for any of them. They all knew the teams and players inside and out and were looking forward to riding the excitement of the entire country as the tournament finally moved into the do-or-die elimination rounds.

Of the three cities they would be travelling to before the Final, Stuttgart, in the Baden-Wurttemberg region, was the smallest and least exciting for both Ali and Ashlyn. Munich and Frankfurt were where they wanted to spend their time. So after forcing themselves out of the hotel early Friday afternoon, they ordered strong coffees and walked to a nearby restaurant for lunch. They would have been perfectly content to amble around the city with their coffees, but they were both starving and had to stop and eat first. Ali had been to Munich once before and deferred to Ashlyn’s more recent and more frequent experience in the city as they made their afternoon plans. The keeper got such a rush of pride and love and, if she was being honest, lust when she watched her gorgeous wife ordering for them in German everywhere they went. The brief display she had put on at Epcot in the Germany pavilion all those years ago didn’t hold a candle to Ali interacting with real Germans in real German restaurants, museums, coffee shops, bakeries, hotels, train stations or pubs. Ashlyn was on cloud 9 and honestly didn’t think it was possible for her to be any happier.

There were several landmarks and museums and beautiful, historic buildings that they wanted to see in Munich and they were hoping that their Saturday would be more organized and efficient in terms of visiting tourist spots. But Friday was for them. Ali wanted to wander wherever their curiosity led them that warm summer afternoon and Ashlyn was more than willing to go along with the plan. After lunch they strolled past all sorts of shops and several of the more than 1,200 fountains the city was famous for. The city centre wasn’t far from their hotel, just far enough so the hubbub and racket didn’t disturb hotel guests in the middle of the night when they were trying to sleep. Ashlyn felt like she could have spent two whole days just exploring the city centre with its’ shops and wandering musicians and biergartens and impromptu minstrel shows. There was a huge outdoor market where every kind of fresh vegetable or fruit you could think of was on display and for sale. There were three or four outdoor delicatessens where you could just order some sliced ham, or German bologna, and eat it like any other snack as you wandered around the beautiful cobblestone and green space. Every kind of shop spilled its goods and wares out into the sidewalk to lure you through the door. The whole thing was intoxicating and exhilarating and made infinitely better by the person attached to the hand Ashlyn held tightly in her own.

Before it got too late in the evening, Ali led her wife to the corner of the city centre where one of the entrances to the Englischer Garten was located. She had planned one surprise for her wife that first day. They held hands and strolled through the huge park marveling at how big and expansive it was. It was called the English Garden because the design had been based on an English garden and it was bigger than New York City’s enormous Central Park. There were four different biergartens located on the grounds and many different buildings and exhibits like museums, temples, a Chinese Tower, restaurants, and playgrounds. A Japanese tea house was the first thing they saw as they moved into the lush park past the Haus der Kunst, a small art museum right next to the park’s entrance. 

“Are you taking me to watch the surfers?” Ashlyn asked as she slowly started to get her bearings. 

She had been to the Eisbach, German for Ice Brook, before with Niki. It was a small, man-made river that flowed through the whole Englischer Garten and was an offshoot of the Isar River that ran just to the South of the park. Just past a bridge, near the tea house, the Eisbach formed a standing wave about four feet high where surfers came to try their luck in the cold, shallow water there. The wave itself was called the Eisbachwelle and it was created by accident when some German engineers miscalculated the best way to slow down the current of the powerful Isar so the Eisbach would flow more serenely through the picturesque park. The engineers submerged concrete blocks just beyond the bridge which did slow the water, but it also created a medium rapid and the standing wave. People started surfing the Eisbachwelle in the 70s and, over the years, managed to tweak it by sinking big boards under the water and tying them to the pylons of the bridge. The boards impacted the current and flow and helped smooth out the wave and made it more available on an everyday basis. 

“Aww” Ali whined and leaned into her wife’s shoulder. She reached her free hand up and held Ashlyn’s bicep while still clasping her hand. “Have you already seen it?” the disappointment in her voice made the keeper love her even more.

“I have” Ashlyn leaned over and gave her a sweet kiss. “But not in, like, twelve years!”

“So it’s ok that we’re here then?” the brunette perked up when she saw how excited her keeper was.

“Of course it’s ok baby” Ashlyn let go of her hand and pulled her in for a side hug as they continued walking towards the bank of the Eisbach where a dozen or so other people had gathered to watch. “I love that you brought me here.”

They found a good spot and smiled at some of the other spectators near them. There was nobody riding the wave right at that moment so it was easier to see into the water below them.

“Do you see those big blocks down there in the water?” the blonde pointed.

“Ummm...oh, yeah. There are a lot of them” Ali peered down into the water.

“There are a lot more of them up there” she pointed up to where the wave started on the other side of the bridge. “They’re what make the wave happen in the first place, but they’re concrete blocks and the water is really shallow so surfing here is incredibly dangerous.” She nudged her wife as a guy in a full wetsuit entered the water with his board. “If you fall wrong you could hit your head on one of the blocks...”

“Yikes” Ali winced at the thought. “I’m so glad I didn’t rent the wetsuit and surfboard for you then” her eyes were wide as she looked at the blonde.

“It’s also cold as fuck...” Ashlyn chuckled.

“Ah, Ice Brook” Ali translated in her head. “Literally” she laughed.

“Exactly” the Florida native shivered at the thought as they watched the surfer start to do some tricks and spins and hops on the wave. “I’m right where I want to be” she pulled the brunette into her, tightening the side hug and kissing the side of her head. “But thank you for planning this for me” she grinned and her dimple appeared. “You’re so good to me Ali. I love you.”

Before they got on the train to Stuttgart Sunday morning they had done themselves proud as eager tourists. On Saturday they visited a castle, took a historic architectural tour, went to three different museums – only stopping when one of the paintings or exhibits really moved them, and spent several hours drinking at the most famous beer house in the world – the Hofbrauhaus am Platzl. 

They hadn’t been standing at the bar for more than ten minutes when a middle-aged German man came up to Ashlyn, got her attention and then pointed up at one of the large tvs hanging around the beer hall.

“Sind sie Ashlyn Harris?”

Ali looked up at the tvs for the first time, feeling foolish for forgetting again that the first two quarterfinal games were that day. The second half of the Switzerland v England game was on right now and Germany had already defeated the Netherlands in the first game. Everywhere they had gone that afternoon they heard boisterous cheers coming out of every biergarten and most of the nearby shops as well. It seemed as though all of Munich had been watching the German women’s game.

“Ja bin ich” Ashlyn replied, hopefully.

He had asked her if she was Ashlyn Harris and she had replied yes I am. She hoped. The man whirled around to the table full of his friends and shouted loudly, clapping Ashlyn on the shoulder at the same time. They all shouted back and applauded and whistled.

“Did I get that right?” the keeper leaned over and asked her wife.

“Yep” Ali grinned. “Very impressive.”

“As much as I’d like you to think that, I have to tell you I’ve been asked that one before” she admitted with a chuckle.

“Doesn’t matter” the brunette kissed her cheek. “It was still sexy as hell” she chuckled. “Now I get why you like it so much when I do that.”

They finished watching England pull off a shaky victory, many viewers feeling like the better team hadn’t won the match, and making friends with about twenty loud and passionate women’s soccer fans. Ali used her wife’s phone and took a couple of pictures of the blonde surrounded by her new friends and a few videos of them watching the game together. Ashlyn had posted live on Instagram during the first game, skipping out early on one of the museums and loving that her wife had been willing to do that. She posted the pictures and videos from the second game too, using all the correct hashtags and lingo. Once the game ended and her soccer fans had departed, the keeper focused on her beautiful brunette again. She took a deep breath and decided there wasn’t going to be a better time to say what she wanted to say.

“I know this isn’t Oktoberfest baby” Ashlyn held her wife’s hands in the loud biergarten that was located right in the city centre and spoke right into her ear, “but I think it’s as close as we can get for right now.”

“What do you mean?” the brunette cocked her head a little, trying to understand. “We’re too early for Oktoberfest” she giggled.

“I know” she rolled her eyes. “I may not speak German but I’m not that stupid” she laughed. “I wanted...”

“What?” Ali squinted at her wife, as if that would help hear her better over the din.

“Come on” Ashlyn pulled her back to the outdoor section of the beer hall where it was a little quieter.

“What’s going on babe? Are you ok?”

It was their last night in Munich and they had spent the entire day sightseeing and being super tourists. They had just had an incredible meal at a really nice restaurant near the last museum they toured, and the Germany game, and were now visiting the most famous beer hall in the entire world. Afterwards they were going to hit one of the lesbian clubs for a little dancing and then head back to their hotel for their own dessert. Ashlyn had an anxious look on her face but she was also smiling and it had Ali very confused as they huddled together in the corner of the outdoor area for some privacy.

“I’m awesome” the keeper grinned and looked a little less anxious with each passing second. “I’m having the absolute best fucking time and I don’t ever want this trip to end” she enthused and took both Ali’s hands in hers again.

“So what are you trying to tell me?” the brunette moved their heads even closer together so they could hear each other better, their cheeks touching and their mouths close to their ears.

“Well,” the keeper got nervous all of a sudden and swallowed hard, “we’ve been to California and gone to some pretty cool places on the coast...I know we haven’t driven up the whole coast yet, but still...” she paused and glanced at Ali who hadn’t figured out what she was talking about yet. “The Taj Mahal will probably be the toughest one to make happen, but I promise you we’ll get there baby. Same with Frank Lloyd Wright’s houses...but we’re going to start hitting those sooner rather than later. I have a plan” she grinned again and felt a little less nervous.

“Ashlyn...” Ali breathed out, recognizing what her keeper was doing.

“But here’s the good news! You know how to surf! We did that one and you did the fuck out of it honey. I’m so proud of you for not giving up on that. Nobody else I know would have stuck with it between babies and breastfeeding and every other thing that kept us so busy” Ashlyn kissed her wife’s cheek as she felt Ali move her hands to her hips and pull their bodies closer together. The blonde put her hands on the back of her wife’s elbows and squeezed them as she continued. “And we have definitely looked at great art together. And we did it in Europe no less! And there’s more to come. I want you to take me to the Stadel Museum when we’re in Frankfurt...”

“Oh Ash” Ali’s voice was filled with emotion and she was trying hard not to let her tears fall. “You’re reading my mind honey. That Cezanne that you love is there. You can see it with your own eyes...”

“See, I love that you know one of my favorite paintings and even know where the hell it is in the world...” Ashlyn’s emotions were starting to get the best of her too.

“And now I get the Oktoberfest thing” Ali beamed at her beloved keeper. “And this is close enough. This is absolutely close enough. God, I love you so much” she brought their lips together in a passionate kiss, not caring who could see them or what anybody thought.

“Listen” Ashlyn moved her hands to cup Ali’s face, gently running her thumbs across her beautiful cheek bones as they stared into each other’s watery eyes. “I know we’re only halfway there, and it probably wasn’t a full list in the first place, but that’s not the point” she shook her head to try and keep herself on track. “I promise you we’re going to do those things Alexandra.”

“I know we are honey” Ali squeezed her hips and pressed their bodies even closer together. “I love our life and I love our kids and I wouldn’t change a thing. But I swear to you we’re going to do those things, and your things, plus a hundred more, before we’re done on this earth.” She waited for a minute because they were both crying and smiling at each other and she found it hard to catch her breath. “You...us...it’s the most important thing in the world to me Ashlyn. Nothing else will ever come close, nothing else ever could come close...I...I...I don’t even think I could breathe without you. I don’t think I’d even want to try...”

It was Ashlyn’s turn to crash their lips together in another, rare, public display of their love. The kiss wasn’t very long because they were both still out of breath and overcome by all the emotion that had jumped out of both of them. They stood there and hugged for several minutes as they composed themselves again.

“Thank you for coming to Germany with me” the keeper said softly as they pulled apart and walked back inside the Hofbrauhaus to order more beer.

“Thank you for inviting me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anybody's confused by what Ashlyn and Ali are talking about - it was the list of things Ali rattled off back during one of their intimate bubble days at the big old house. Ashlyn told her how she could sometimes picture what their kids would look like and Ali talked about wanting to see and do things with the keeper before they got tied down with a busy kid life. Part 2, Chapter 26 if anyone wants to revisit it.


	30. Best Night in Germany Ever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut warning.  
> This one's a little bit longer than usual but I hope you won't mind. Let me know... ;)

In Stuttgart Ashlyn and Birgit called the first game on Sunday with Sweden beating France. Ali hung out in the ‘green room’ which was basically the room Ashlyn and Birgit used when they weren’t on the air. She had charmed all of the keeper’s colleagues with her smile and personality and then dazzled them with her German, which was a little rusty but still mostly fluent. Nobody had to know she listened to German language CDs in the minivan to brush up before the trip. The brunette went out of her way to tell Birgit Prinz how incredible it had been to watch her play her club football in Frankfurt when she had lived there for her junior year. Birgit had won the FIFA player of the year that year too, one of the three in a row and Ali remembered how thrilled the whole country was, but especially Frankfurt. She was their hometown heroine and everybody worshipped and respected her. And even though that year was especially difficult for Ali after losing her own soccer dreams, she had found it impossible to stay away from the game entirely. She only attended a couple of matches, being there in person was definitely harder than just watching the match on tv in a pub while alcohol helped dull the ache, but she remembered them, and Birgit Prinz, vividly.

In the second game they called that Sunday in Stuttgart, Iceland beat Norway and made most of the rest of the woso community happy. Everybody loved Iceland. The tiny little country that had some of the most devoted fans in the entire world had been steadily getting better, talent-wise, on the pitch in both their men’s and women’s soccer teams. They were the underdog in almost every situation just because of the tiny size of the country and the corresponding, infinitesimal size of the available player pool. Ashlyn and Ali only made two stops on Monday before catching an afternoon train from Stuttgart up to Frankfurt. They rented a car and drove to one of the many vineyards in the hills that surrounded the city, and then they visited the Porsche museum. The lure of Paris was strong – it was only a four-hour train ride away from Stuttgart, but they decided to stick to their plan and spend some time in Frankfurt, the city that Ali had grown to love so much.

They spent three days in Frankfurt, although most of the third day was spent watching Germany beat Sweden in the first semi-final game and then Iceland continued their fairytale tournament by sending England home in the game that Ashlyn and Birgit called that night. The city had changed quite a bit, some of it quite drastically, since Ali had been there last. But she still loved it. Ashlyn couldn’t stop staring at her wife’s gorgeous face as she showed another part of her life to the keeper. Ashlyn knew Ali’s year in Germany had been difficult and complicated and sometimes dark. She also knew that her wife had found a way to see through that darkness and find a light and a love there that helped her get back to herself. The keeper would always love Frankfurt for all that it had given her beautiful brunette. She secretly wished she had a child left to name so she could somehow work Frankfurt into it to show her love and respect for the city. 

Ali took them to every place that had ever meant anything to her during her time in Frankfurt. Sometimes it was grand, like St. Bartholomew’s Gothic Cathedral or the four Imperial Statues near town hall in Romerberg Square. Sometimes it was a tiny café that had given her hours of peace in a turbulent time. The brunette had cried tears of joy to see that her favorite café was still in business. It had been passed down to the next generation but was still in the same family and they still made the best hornchen she had ever tasted. It was basically a German croissant but better and Ali’s eyes rolled back in her head for a few seconds as she let the first bite melt onto her tongue.

“Well ok then, we can cross ‘croissants that are better than sex’ off the list” Ashlyn chuckled as she watched her wife in her glory.

The keeper’s favorite was the Berliner, jam-filled, which was basically a donut without a hole. They were covered with sugar – powdered or granulated, and tasted a thousand times better than any donut Ashlyn had ever had since leaving Germany more than a decade ago. 

The couple went to the top of the Commerzbank Tower and looked down at the beautiful city from almost 900 feet up. They worked their way up and down the Zeil – Frankfurt’s central shopping street. They ambled down the cobblestone streets and spent some time each day in the Frankfurter Stadtwald which was basically a big forest right in the middle of the city. There were streams and ponds and several gazebos scattered throughout the space where it wasn’t quite as dense with trees. Ali stopped short and looked around, puzzled, when they got to a quiet area between two small ponds. Ashlyn squeezed her hand, silently asking her what was wrong.

“I thought this was where my tree was” she frowned as she continued to scan the area in case she was just at the wrong pond or something. “But it’s not here...”

They walked a bit farther and then went up a ways through thicker woods before returning to the same spot between the ponds again. The brunette’s shoulders slumped as she looked forlornly at the lush grass that was growing where she thought her favorite tree ought to be.

“Suchst du den baum?” an elderly woman who had been slowly walking the path the whole time Ali and Ashlyn had done their loop trying to find the tree asked with a friendly smile.

“Ja” Ali shrugged her shoulders and smiled back. “She asked me if we’re looking for the tree” she translated quickly for Ashlyn before the woman began speaking in German again.

It took several minutes for the conversation to come to a conclusion and then Ali cheerfully thanked the woman for her help.

“Well I’m not losing my mind...”

“Whew” Ashlyn teased and winked while Ali rolled her eyes at her.

“We’re in the right spot but my tree was struck by lightning several years ago. She thought maybe four or five years.”

“Aw, I’m sorry honey” the keeper rubbed Ali’s arms and gave her a sad look.

“I am too. That tree was fucking awesome. It was a huge old oak. They think, or thought I guess now, that it was one of the oldest in the whole forest. I used to sit under it for hours and read or just look up at the sky through the branches and leaves. Anna used to say that if she ever couldn’t find me she’d just come to the tree and here I’d be” the brunette sighed heavily as she turned to face the closest pond.

Of all the places Ali had shown her keeper this was by far the most emotional she had ever gotten. Even more so than the café with the croissants. Ashlyn wasn’t sure if it was just because the tree wasn’t there anymore or for another, deeper reason. She couldn’t pretend hearing Anna’s name just then hadn’t stabbed her a little bit. She wondered if Ali was feeling the same thing. Like a flashback of feelings that didn’t fit anymore. The blonde walked up behind her wife and gently hugged her.

“Is this ok or do you want me to leave you alone for a little while?” Ashlyn asked softly, with nothing but care and concern in her voice.

“No” Ali grabbed her wife’s forearm that was resting loosely around her stomach. “Stay with me.”

They sat together in the grass the way they often did, with Ali in between Ashlyn’s legs, her back to the blonde’s front. They were quiet, just enjoying the beautiful summer afternoon in the forest that happened to be in the middle of a big city. If you didn’t look to the North and see the skyscrapers and if you couldn’t hear the airplanes taking off and landing from the International Airport just to the South, you’d never know there was anything but the forest around you. 

“I can’t even begin to tell you how many hours I spent here” Ali finally spoke quietly but clearly. They had moved around so that Ali was lying on her back with her head resting on Ashlyn’s thigh. The keeper was leaning back on one arm and playing with her wife’s hair with her other hand. “There was just something about it that reminded me a little bit of home but then, at the same time, felt absolutely foreign to me too. If I ever went for a walk I’d end up here.”

“I’m glad you found someplace that you felt so comfortable. I’m trying not to worry, after the fact, that it might not have been the safest place to spend hours all by yourself” Ashlyn admitted.

“Oh it was safe. There were always people around but it’s such a big area that you always had your own space. You’ve been watching too many ‘Criminal Minds’ reruns” Ali laughed and playfully poked her wife’s leg.

They stayed for almost an hour but the wind shifted and they could both tell that it was going to rain soon. They got to their feet and walked down closer to the pond for one last look before turning around and starting the walk back out to the city.

“Hey, what’s this?” Ashlyn pointed at the ground about 20 feet closer to the path than they had just been sitting.

“Oh my God” Ali smiled. It was soft at first but it kept growing as she kept reading the small plaque that had been installed into what was left of the trunk of the enormous tree. The grass had grown up and over the edges of the very short stump so it had been impossible to see unless you were directly over it. “It says the tree was cut down and the wood from it was used to build a new playground as well as four new benches around the other pond over there” she pointed to the slightly larger pond. “That’s the best” she grinned as she thought about the joy her favorite tree had been giving to kids and park visitors all these years. “I love that.”

//

They took a train up to Dusseldorf Friday afternoon, squeezing in another half day in Frankfurt before bidding it farewell. Ali wanted Ashlyn to show her where she had spent her time in Dusseldorf and Duisburg, the much smaller city about 30 minutes away from Dusseldorf by train. The final game was Sunday at 5pm in Dortmund and the entire country was ecstatic because the German women had managed to make it all the way to the championship game. If they could defeat Iceland it would be a dream come true for the German fans who had loyally filled each stadium at every step of the tournament. But before Sunday arrived, Ashlyn gave her wife a tour of what she could remember about her wild and crazy days with Niki in Dusseldorf. Ali thought back to one of the very first conversations she had ever had with Molly and Niki. They had brought baby Noah up to the big old house and they all chatted and laughed and caught up with each other’s lives, Whitney included. There had been talk about wild days in Germany and Molly pretty much told Ali the less she knew about it the happier she would be. The brunette had never questioned that advice. Molly wouldn’t have said it if she hadn’t sincerely believed it. But it occurred to Ali now, as they walked through the more Northern city with the Rhine River running right through the heart of it, that she had never heard any Germany stories, other than strictly soccer tales.

“So are you finally going to let me in on the debauched life you led while you were up here or what?” she teased as they checked into their hotel Friday night.

“Who? Me?” Ashlyn looked genuinely surprised.

“Yes you” Ali squinted at her. “I’m not falling for your little miss innocent act either” she chuckled and shook her head. “Not buying it for a second.”

“Al, there’s really nothing to tell” they continued their conversation in the elevator and into their room. “I lived in Duisburg and when Niki came to visit I met her here and we had fun. Then she went back to Munich and I went back to Duisburg.”

“Ashlyn” Ali smirked at her as she plopped down on the bed, propping herself up against pillows on the headboard while the keeper put their suitcases up on the little suitcase stands and got out her toiletries. “I’ve talked to Molly about you two wild girls in Germany” she stretched the truth by ten miles.

But she was glad she did when she saw the panicked look on her wife’s face as she ducked into the bathroom to unpack the toiletries. What the hell was Ashlyn hiding from her? It took a lot more cajoling but Ali finally got the answer she was looking for from her wife.

“Alright! Alright! God” she moaned and flopped face down on the bed, perpendicular to Ali and just below her feet, too embarrassed to face the brunette.

Now that it was time to hear whatever it was that Ashlyn had been trying so hard to keep from her, Ali was nervous and kind of regretted pushing so hard for the information. What if Molly had been right and Ali would have been happier not knowing?

“Ash, listen, I’m just busting on you. You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to. Really. I mean it” she leaned forward and patted her keeper’s butt, near her feet.

“No, I’ll tell you. I just...I don’t talk about it because it’s nothing I’m proud of and I kind of feel like I’m talking about somebody else entirely when I look back on this year of my life. I don’t think I was quite myself either, if I’m really being honest” she rolled onto her side so she was facing the head of the bed and her wife. “Just promise me that you’ll still love me anyway.”

Ali knew she was mostly kidding but part of her was still nervous.

“I’ll always love you babe. You know that. Now spill, once and for all” Ali chuckled. “And come closer to me, you’re too far away” she playfully whined and then grinned when her keeper crawled up the bed to curl into the side of her legs with her blonde head on Ali’s lap. “So much better” Ali purred and moved her hand to Ashlyn’s back and began rubbing soft patterns into her shirt.

“It’s really all Niki’s fault. One of her teammates set her up with a girl from Dusseldorf who was visiting Munich. Nobody really thought anything would come of it. Maybe they’d have fun at the bar with everybody that night after the game...maybe have a one-night stand. But they really hit it off, mostly in the bedroom if you know what I mean” she lowered her voice before continuing. “The girl was...wild and into all sorts of things and Nik ended up spending as much time as she could up in Dusseldorf. Every time she got a day off she’d make the trip. It was great for me because I got to see her a lot.”

“Eww, how were you seeing her if she was coming here to hook-up with this girl?” Ali frowned. “Or is this the part that Molly said I really didn’t want to know about?” she chuckled nervously. “And, wait, Niki’s into...that stuff?”

“What? God, no, honey...just...no” Ashlyn shook her head. “I have never had a threesome and I have no interest in having a threesome” she said definitively. She glanced up at the brunette and saw that her face was concerned but still playful. “There’s no way in hell I’m sharing you with anybody” she squeezed Ali’s thighs with her arm across both of them and buried her face in her crotch, humming her devotion.

“Whew” the brunette exhaled and giggled. She stroked Ashlyn’s cheek when the blonde returned her face to Ali’s lap. “Ok, keep going.”

“Well, Dusseldorf was just as fashion-y and full of the beautiful people back then as it is now. Sort of like the Milan of Germany, I guess. Sasha always travelled and hung out with a pack of these...girls.”

“Are these models Ash? Are you going to tell me a story about you and Niki and some kinky model sex shit?” her eyes were wide and, for a minute, she really truly did wish she had never brought it up. The brunette felt a stab of jealousy in her chest.

“Ali, are you kidding me?” Ashlyn lifted her head up to laugh at her wife. “Sasha was kinky as hell, I’ll give you that, but I had nothing to do with her or that.”

“So what did you have to do with it then?”

The keeper took a deep breath and then let it out slowly. 

“I had to entertain the pack of girls while Niki and Sasha took off and hooked up” she closed her eyes and groaned.

“Well what did this entail, just out of curiosity, you know, in case your wife of almost 9 years wanted to know?” 

At first Ali had been nervous but now she was more amused than anything, with tiny pangs of jealousy every so often. And seeing how uncomfortable Ashlyn was told her a lot about how much her wife had grown and changed since her Dusseldorf days.

“First of all, it was 13 years ago...”

“Quit stalling and give me the dirt, All-star!” Ali grinned, unable to hide her amusement anymore.

“Ok, ok” Ashlyn chuckled, head still in her wife’s lap and unable to see the huge grin on Ali’s face. She could tell by her voice that the brunette wasn’t upset, but she had no idea how much she was enjoying this. “I was supposed to buy them drinks and make sure they were having a good time, so Sasha and Niki would have time to...you know...have sex” she shrugged. “If the girls got bored or wanted to leave or go to a different club, Sasha got upset.”

“So how many girls are we talking about there, Casanova? And how did you have money to buy them all drinks?”

“Oh I made Niki give me money. I didn’t have any extra money at all” she sighed. “But, I tried to help her out as much as I could. She was having a great time. I was happy for her.”

“I’ll bet she was” Ali smirked as she played with the back of Ashlyn’s hair and neck. “But were you having any fun?”

There was the question that the blonde had been dreading. It was the reason she never talked about this with Ali, ever. She felt her whole body tense up and knew her wife would feel it too. Ali never missed things like that, especially not at times like this where it was just the two of them without any toddler distractions.

“Al, I...” she wanted to sit up, but she couldn’t bring herself to face her beautiful brunette. “I don’t talk about this because...well...I’m ashamed of this part of my life” her voice was so soft Ali could barely hear it.

The brunette had felt her wife’s body go rigid and she noticed that her hands had started to nervously pick at the seams of Ali’s jeans. She kept rubbing Ashlyn’s back and playing with her hair, trying to reassure her nervous keeper.

“You know, you don’t have to tell me honey. I’m not upset and I didn’t mean to get you upset...” she paused, trying to find the right words. “I have a part of my life that I don’t tell anyone about either, for the same reason. I know I didn’t do anything wrong, but” she shrugged, “it just wasn’t my finest moment and I’m not proud of who I was at that time.”

“You mean the Emily thing?” Ashlyn hugged her wife’s thighs again.

“No, although that certainly applies there too” Ali chuckled softly and then sighed. “I mean when I was here, in Germany. I was a mess and, I don’t know, I guess I was more careless and reckless than I knew I should be.”

“Do you mean with Anna and Willem or were you, like, playing chicken on the autobahn or something?” Ashlyn teased gently, leaning her head back and meeting her wife’s thoughtful gaze.

“Ha!” Ali laughed her short, loud, shout of a laugh and smiled broadly at her adorable keeper. “I know it seems tepid compared to the hot stuff you probably did in Dusseldorf” she paused and quirked an eyebrow at the blonde, “but yeah, I jumped into bed with both of them way faster than I ever had before or would again. It was my wild period I guess and, I don’t know” she shrugged again, looking steadily into her favorite tawny hazel eyes, “I don’t love who I was then. That’s all.”

Ashlyn smiled up at her wife and hugged her around her hips, pressing a kiss into her stomach. She knew Ali was trying to make her feel ok about sharing her story and she loved how she never pressured her, ever. The brunette had told Ashlyn about both Anna and Willem and how young and dumb and naïve she had been with both of her German lovers. She had confessed and Ashlyn hadn’t thought anything of it, other than that her wife had made her way through a tough year of discovery and come out the other side better and stronger. Not quite strong enough, obviously, or she would never have fallen into the Emily mess. But Ashlyn knew that Ali looked back fondly on her time in Germany and this vacation only further proved that point. So she had some regrets about some of it. Who didn’t have regrets? Ashlyn knew she sure had her own. She sighed heavily and nuzzled her head back into Ali’s lap again.

“I helped Niki because I knew that there was a good chance that I’d end up going home with one of Sasha’s friends.” The admission hung there for a few seconds while Ashlyn waited for her wife to say something. But Ali was quiet. She just kept moving her hands over the keeper’s back and head as she had been all along. Ashlyn swallowed and forged ahead. “A really good chance. Every time, really.”

It was quiet again as Ashlyn’s heart pounded, waiting to hear what her beautiful brunette thought of her.

“Ash, I’m not judging you” Ali finally spoke after another few minutes. “If you think I’m going to all of a sudden love you less because you slept around when you were alone in a foreign country for a year...well, that’s crazy. Unless you treated those girls like shit, which I know you didn’t do, then you didn’t do anything millions of people do all the time. I don’t get why you’re so hard on yourself about this. What am I missing?”

Relief and love surged through the keeper’s body as she listened to Ali’s words. How had she gotten so lucky? And the best part, the part that reached right down into Ashlyn’s soul, was that the brunette knew she couldn’t have mistreated those girls. Ali knew Ashlyn just didn’t have it in her to be cruel or heartless, even as she was sleeping her way through the group of friends.

“Well, I slept with different girls in the same group of friends. That’s pretty shitty in my book. I still can’t believe I thought that was ok” she shook her head sadly.

“Honey, if those girls were the type of girls I think they were, they knew what they were doing and were fine with it. I mean, as long as you didn’t get up out of one girl’s bed and go into the next bedroom to another one...”

“Oh my God!” Ashlyn sat up, horrified, and turned her anguished face to the brunette’s. “I would never...”

“I know!” Ali chuckled and answered emphatically. “That’s what I’m saying babe. If any one of those girls had made you feel like it was wrong you would have stopped, right?”

“Definitely.”

“So relax. It’s ok. You had a fun time while Niki was having a fun time and nobody got hurt. Right?”

“Yeah. Stupid Niki.”

“Oh, please” Ali quirked an eyebrow at her wife. “Don’t blame Niki. She may have helped the situation present itself but she didn’t make you do anything.”

“No, you’re right” she looked down and blushed. “But I still blame her. Stupid Niki.”

Ashlyn tried to keep a straight face but failed, giggling softly as she met Ali’s eyes again. She straddled the brunette’s lap and ran her hands up and down her arms, Ali’s hands massaging the keeper’s thighs.

“So Niki’s into the kinky stuff” Ali nodded and smirked. “Who knew?”

“Oh shit, you can’t tell her I told you any of this” Ashlyn’s eyes went wide.

“You haven’t told me anything Ash, I couldn’t tease her even if I wanted to” Ali laughed and tickled her wife’s sides for a quick second before returning her warm hands to her keeper’s strong thighs.

“Ok, that’s true” she nodded thoughtfully.

“So just how kinky? What kind of kinky? You don’t have to give me specifics but give me an idea...” Ali pouted and moved her hands to Ashlyn’s stomach and waistband.

“Alright, alright” she giggled, leaning in to kiss the brunette’s lips lightly. “As far as I know, it was mainly a public sex kink. With a little bondage and leather when they were at her place, but nothing much more than we’ve done.”

“Wow” Ali’s eyebrows both went up.

“Aw, don’t judge Nik...she’d never known anybody like that before and it was more of an experimentation phase I think” the keeper defended her friend. “She had the time of her life, don’t get me wrong” she chuckled. “But I think part of why it was so fun and so hot was that she knew it was temporary. They both did.”

“Yeah, I get it. And Molly must know because she always tells me it’s better if I don’t know what you two got up to when you were over here” she giggled, moving her hands up and down Ashlyn’s sides and around to her lower back.

“I honestly don’t know what Molly knows, but I’m betting probably all of it. They’re good like that. Niki totally trusts her.” Ashlyn pushed some of Ali’s hair off of her neck and rubbed her shoulders. “And Molly’s no prude either” she made a knowing face and chuckled again. “I’m just saying.”

“Wait, didn’t they start dating while Niki was still in Germany?”

“Yep. Nik came home for Christmas and they finally got introduced to each other at a party. They had friends in common who had been trying to hook them up for, like, years, but the timing was never right. After that party they started writing and calling and texting each other when Nik was back in Munich. Molly went there for business and that was it. They were hooked.”

“Please tell me Niki wasn’t sleeping with Sasha, in public no less, while she was dating Molly...” Ali’s voice got low and for the first time during that entire conversation felt the beginning of disdain start to form.

“No way” Ashlyn shook her head and smiled. “She may have sowed some wild oats but as soon as she met Molly everything changed. She stopped making extra trips to Dusseldorf” the keeper giggled. “And once she and Mol started dating, she never saw Sasha again. Even when they did the long-distance thing for Niki’s second season with Bayern.”

Ali felt her whole body relax as a broad smiled covered her face. She loved both Niki and Molly, a lot. It would have killed her to think less of Niki and she was grateful she didn’t have to. She also couldn’t stop wondering if Niki and Molly had sex in public.

“So...” the brunette sat up and kissed her wife’s neck, working her way up to her ear before leaning back and looking into her slightly pink face. “Why don’t you take me to one of those clubs you used to ‘entertain’ in tonight?” she purred and blinked up at the blonde through her lashes.

“Hmmmmm, that sounds like a great idea” she smirked back. “You’re so hot you’ll fit right in with all the other models...probably make them feel bad...”

“Ha!” Ali laughed her short, loud shout of a laugh again, ruining the mood. “I’m sorry honey” she apologized through her nose-crinkling grin and kissed Ashlyn’s lips quickly. “I know you really believe that and it means more to me than you could possibly know, really, it does” she tried to get more serious but didn’t really succeed. “But that’s funny.”

“Oh you think so?” Ashlyn quirked an eyebrow and grinned devilishly.

“Oh no...don’t do it, whatever it is...” Ali giggled and tried to back up but there was no way she was going anywhere with Ashlyn straddling her lap.

“Laugh at me will you?” she grinned at her beautiful brunette and then started tickling her mercilessly. 

Ali squirmed and laughed and gasped for breath and tried to defend herself but she was completely helpless. She rolled to her side but that just gave Ashlyn more access to her back and ass. It was a losing battle and the brunette knew it. 

“Wait, wait!” Ali gasped out, still grinning. “I have a proposition for you! Wait!”

Ashlyn suspected a trick but paused. One hand was under her wife’s top arm, nicely tucked against the side of her breast, fingers ready to start tickling again immediately. Her other hand was underneath Ali, wedged between the bed and the side of her soft stomach. Both her arms were stretched out to their full length so the brunette couldn’t reach her in return. The keeper cocked her head and narrowed her eyes as she looked at her desperate wife.

“I’m listening” she said evenly, still not trusting the situation.

“Ok” Ali panted. “If you stop tickling me now...” she paused for effect and tried to get her out of breath voice to sound as sexy as possible, “maybe we can try some kinky public sex at the club tonight...”

Before Ali had even finished her sentence, Ashlyn released her and launched herself back to the foot of the bed in one smooth, fast motion.

“Deal!” she shouted enthusiastically.

Ali was taken aback by how quickly her wife had jumped at the chance, but she smiled while she caught her breath when she saw Ashlyn’s eyes already starting to darken.

It was almost 10pm when they got to the club that night. Ali, of course, had insisted they eat dinner first. And Ashlyn, of course, had made sure they ate at a beautiful restaurant and enjoyed every bit of it before moving towards what was next. If Ali was willing to try something bold then she was going to make sure her queen was properly taken care of along the way. They had had public sex, or semi-public sex, before and it just wasn’t really their thing. Ali was shy and loud which were both problematic. And Ashlyn had a borderline phobia about public bathrooms so that made it less fun for her. They had fucked a few times in the ocean, none more publicly than the first time at Good Harbor Beach near the big old house. And then there was the time they had sex in the private bathroom at Gillette Stadium during the Patriots game. And Ali’s office at Knight-Harris was their most popular semi-public place to get down. They were so careful about it though – only when they were the only two people in the building, that it barely counted. Tonight, they were hoping, might be different. The idea of spending an hour rubbing up against each other on a jam-packed dance floor and then finishing each other off...somewhere...was exciting for both of them.

As they walked to the club they had chosen, Ali pulled her wife into a corner store. It was one of those mom and pop stores where you could buy your newspaper every morning or stop and pick up some milk on the way home from work. It was a German version of a convenience store. The brunette walked quickly up and down the aisles, the short black dress with the slightly flowy skirt she wore swishing as her strong legs brushed up against the fabric. Her hair was down and curled into sexy waves that fell just above her shoulders and the make-up around her eyes was thick and dark. When Ashlyn started to protest about the unscheduled stop, the brunette hushed her and then paid the old man at the cash register for her purchase.

“Here, put this on” she leaned into her wife’s chest and lightly kissed her lips. “I don’t want to share you with anybody in there. No autographs or selfies if we’re going to do this.”

Ashlyn took the black beanie, ripped the tag off of it and put it on her head with a smirk. Ali thought of everything.

“Smart and sexy...mmmmmmmm...” she murmured next to her ear after pressing a kiss to her cheek as they continued their walk to the club.

“Try and tone down your gorgeousness, just a little babe” Ali giggled. “Hat or no hat you’ll still be the most beautiful woman in that club.”

Ashlyn did her best to stay as anonymous as possible, but they both realized that this was probably not the best time or place to try this. Ashlyn had been on the entire country’s tv screens for the past three weeks. Everybody knew who she was. They might not know much about her, but they sure recognized her. The keeper rolled the sleeves of her pale blue button up shirt down to try and cover up her distinctive tattoos. Other than trying not to smile as much, that was about all she could do. Ali hated to see her dim her light like that, but if they were really going to try and have sex somewhere in this club tonight, there really wasn’t another choice.

The club was dark and packed. They had carefully chosen a techno club that didn’t cater to any particular audience, Ashlyn was afraid she would be too easily spotted at a lesbian club. It was perfect though. It was the kind of club where you stepped inside and felt like you were on another planet. The very atmosphere was different as people of all sizes and shapes moved together in the crowded spaces. The air was thick in the summer night and smelled of liquor, different co-mingled perfumes and colognes, and sweat. They got their drinks and downed them without much fanfare. Neither of them wanted to be drunk. They wanted to pay attention in case something went wrong with their plan, and also so they could remember what they hoped would be a fun and thrilling experience. After a couple of drinks with dinner, the one they just put away had them both feeling a nice buzz. Ali led them to the dance floor, her palm slightly sweaty in her wife’s hand. She was nervous but excited and already more than a little turned on. They had both been hot and bothered by the idea ever since the brunette had made her proposition back at the hotel. It had been four hours since then and they were eager to see what would happen.

The dance floor was both darker and lighter than the rest of the club. The lighting was lower in general and it could be almost pitch black between flashes of the strobe light and other colorful dance floor lights. Ashlyn squeezed Ali’s hand and steered them over to one side of the area, hoping to eliminate at least some of the potential eyes that might see what they were up to. The techno music wasn’t either of their favorite but it was impossible not to get a little lost in it. The constant pounding of the fast-paced beats barraged them from all sides as they started to dance together. Ali felt the same thrill she always felt when she got to dance with her sexy keeper. It was easily one of her favorite things to do and she always wished they did it more often back at home. But, she was usually the one complaining about how loud the music was or how obnoxious some of the other club patrons were whenever they tried to go out. She was 41 years old now and didn’t have the patience for all the bullshit involved with going out dancing anymore.

But this night was different. This night was special and unique and she let her body move with the pulsating beat without a single care about anything other than her wife’s body next to her. Ashlyn enjoyed the same release, keeping her hands on her wife at all times as they let go together. It was so dark in there that it was hard for them to see the other’s face, even when they were standing an inch away. It was perfect. The strobe light was annoying when it flashed through the darkness with its’ erratic and spastic effect. But that same strobe light and effect made it impossible to see anything clearly on the dance floor. Which was a very good thing. The bodies all moved in a big mass, heads bobbing up and down like one giant organism. There were couples all over the dance floor, Ali and Ashlyn had seen them as they walked over to their place by the wall. And, true to most of the experiences they’d had in Germany, there were gay and lesbian as well as straight couples moving together to the music. Ali and Ashlyn danced together, hands groping and pulling and squeezing, the entire time. They kissed when they were facing each other and had the breath for it. Ali squeezed her arm between their bodies and pressed her fingers against Ashlyn’s mound, loving the moan she heard from her wife’s lips near her ear. They continued the build-up, grinding against each other and stealing intimate touches as the frenetic energy of the dance floor kept pushing them farther and farther past where they would normally stop in public. It felt like time was going too fast and then not nearly fast enough all at once. 

They spent an hour dancing and sweating and touching and grinding. The position that was definitely the most titillating was when Ali had her back to Ashlyn’s front and was grinding her ass into her crotch. The keeper wrapped her arms around Ali’s body and let her lead them. When Ali bent over Ashlyn went with her, chest pressed against her back and hands moving quickly to the brunette’s breasts and mound. She felt a jolt in her center every time she touched Ali’s stiff nipples and felt her arch her back in response. And the damp panties she felt against her fingertips when she slipped her hand underneath the front of her wife’s short dress made her weak in the knees. Ashlyn nipped at and kissed any bare skin she could find on Ali’s shoulder and neck, loving how hot and sweaty her sexy brunette had become. It was August 1st and felt every bit like a sweltering summer night inside that club. The blonde could feel the sweat running down her own back and between her breasts as she toiled underneath the hat and long sleeves. She had never wanted to take her shirt off more in her entire life than she did right at that moment.

Whenever Ali turned around and faced her was when the keeper had to summon every ounce of will-power she had. The brunette straddled Ashlyn’s thigh as they moved to the percussive and never-ending beat. She ground against it as she leaned in and played with both breasts, dragging sloppy kisses down her keeper’s chest as she pinched her nipples. Then she snaked her hand back down to where the real heat was emanating from. Ali got so bold after a while that she unbuttoned her wife’s pants so she could fit her hand inside them easier, the shirt front she had untucked so long ago covering for her once her hand was back outside again. She bit her own lip hard enough to draw blood as she felt how wet Ashlyn was, how ready her keeper was. Ali stretched her fingers all the way down and cupped her wife’s core, letting the heel of her palm hit her mound as they moved together. During one of their turns like this she really thought Ashlyn was going to pull her dress up over her hips right there on the dance floor. The keeper’s hands were desperately clutching her ass and moving lower and lower and lower. It was during one of these moments when they crashed their lips together and panted their way through a passionate, sloppy kiss. Ali’s fingers went even farther this time, sliding inside her wife’s underwear on their way down her front. She spent a moment on her clit and then kept going until she had two fingers inside her center, making Ashlyn’s whole body shiver and her eyes go wide. The brunette had her wife pressed up against the wall and they were both dripping wet between their legs as they kept kissing. Ali fingered her keeper for another few minutes, unable to really thrust because of the angle, and still not feeling quite comfortable enough to do more anyway. Ashlyn reached her arm down and lifted up the front of the brunette’s dress so she could return the favor, moving the silky panties to the side and sliding her long fingers inside Ali’s pulsing core. They both knew in that moment, as they pulled their heads back an inch to look at each other in shock and wonder, that it was time to find someplace more private or they were going to fuck each other right there on that dance floor.

Ashlyn pulled her fingers back out and grabbed her wife’s hand out of her pants, leading her back across the dance floor. There was a long line for the restrooms and she got frustrated and a little angry as she scanned around for possible solutions. There was a door that led up to the DJ booth and, just as she was about to give it a try, she saw a woman come out of another door with two big bottles of champagne in her hands. She pulled Ali with her and grabbed the edge of the door just before it closed, sliding inside and bringing her wife with her. They stood stock still for a few seconds, waiting for their eyes to adjust. Ashlyn had already gone down one step before catching her balance and realizing that they were at the top of a flight of stairs. The overhead lights were off and when Ali reached for the switch on the wall Ashlyn shook her head. It was damp and a little cooler behind the door and the music still assaulted their senses, albeit more muted and a little farther away. Ali, unsure what the plan was, promptly put her arms around her wife from behind and picked up right where they had left off. She whined softly when she discovered she couldn’t reach between Ashlyn’s legs because she was a step lower.

The keeper could finally see the stairs in front of her and started descending them, navigating the 90 degree left turn near the bottom and guiding Ali along with her. It was a basement storage area or something. There was a dimly lit hallway in front of them with two doors opening off of it on either side, all four doors were closed. There was a dark corner underneath the stairs with a bench and a bunch of coats and aprons hung up on hooks around it. Before the blonde could make her decision, Ali pushed her towards it from behind. Neither one of them said a word as they moved quickly into the small area, but as soon as Ashlyn turned around her wife was on her again. They kissed hungrily, moans barely audible over the loud music from the club above them. Ali wasted absolutely no time and pulled Ashlyn’s pants and underwear down below her knees, spreading her thighs out on her way back up. The scent that filled her nose was so strong and made her body react so powerfully that the brunette thought she might come before Ashlyn even touched her again. She closed her eyes and summoned strength and plunged her fingers back inside her keeper’s drenched pussy. Ali bent over so she could pump her fingers hard and fast the way she wanted to, letting her other hand move quickly from squeezing Ashlyn’s nipples through her shirt and bra to teasing her clit. But this was no time for teasing and the brunette was reminded of that when her wife’s whole body trembled and she fell backwards, leaning against the coats and aprons that hung on the wall just behind her. Ali didn’t stop though. She stepped forward with her sexy blonde and increased her pace, sure the whole world could hear the loud, wet, slapping that was coming from between Ashlyn’s legs as she worked her towards orgasm. As soon as the brunette started rubbing harder on her keeper’s clit, Ashlyn came hard. She was supporting herself against the clothing behind her on her elbow and she had her other hand covering her mouth as her orgasm ripped through her. Her stomach muscles clenched and her whole body shook as Ali wrapped both arms around her waist and hips to help hold her up. After a minute, Ashlyn uncovered her mouth and let Ali pull her up into a hug and another deep kiss.

The door above them opened suddenly and a swath of light fell across the corner where the stairs bent 90 degrees. Both women held their breath and stood as still as possible. Poor Ashlyn was still recovering from her orgasm and every twitch seemed bigger and louder than it really was. They heard voices in German and then the door closed again, making the basement and their little dressing area dim again. Ali bent down and pulled her wife’s underwear and pants up, pressing a quick kiss to her short curls as she covered them up. She stood up straight, swallowing the desire that was still running hot and deep inside her, and kissed Ashlyn hard.

“Come on, let’s get out of here” she whispered.

“No fucking way” Ashlyn shook her head as she switched their positions before the brunette could protest.

The keeper smashed their lips together in the hungriest kiss of the night so far, losing herself in Ali’s incredible mouth and that talented tongue of hers. Ashlyn slid her wife’s dress up past her hips and yanked her sexy red panties down to her knees. She reached down and moved the bench away from the wall about a foot, careful not to make any noise. It was a hard, simple, uncomfortable wooden bench not more than a foot wide and she felt bad for Ali. But she knew she’d have an easier time getting off if she wasn’t worried about losing her feet. Ashlyn lowered the brunette back onto the bench, freeing one of her legs from the panties at the same time. She spread Ali’s legs out and took a long lick through her soaked folds, making the brunette’s legs tremble. There was a loud bang against the door above them but it didn’t open. They locked eyes and Ashlyn could see the fear in her wife’s eyes. The arousal and lust was still there, just as it had been all night long, but Ashlyn knew this was going to have to be fast and dirty. She smirked at the brunette and reached up to pinch one of her nipples, hard. When Ali arched her back in response, the keeper pushed two fingers into her wet and wanting pussy, groaning when she felt her wife’s hot center grabbing at them already. Ashlyn looked again at her beautiful brunette’s face, but it was red and her eyes were closed as she smiled and panted in time with the thrusts. Ashlyn knelt next to the bench and pounded her right hand into her wife’s softest flesh while she carefully worked from one breast to the other with her free hand. It only took a minute for Ali to reach down and start to rub her own clit, tightly gripping Ashlyn’s upper arm to help steady herself as she started to wobble on the bench. She focused on her keeper’s sweaty face, amazed at the fact that she still looked sexy as hell even in that silly black beanie. Ashlyn leaned down and sucked on her wife’s thigh, nipping at the warm skin with her teeth and then licking some more. She heard Ali groan, loudly, and moved her hand off of her brunette’s breasts and up to cover her mouth instead. They heard a cough from the other direction, down the hall behind one of the doors, and the adrenaline spiked in both of them. Everything that each of Ali’s senses was experiencing was heightened. The slightly dank smell of the basement. The loud but dull thudding of the music. The salty sweat on her tongue from Ashlyn’s skin. The hazy beauty of dark hazel eyes, hooded and intense. And the fucking feel of fingers and lips and teeth as she raced towards her orgasm. Ali’s eyes finally closed as she found her release, coming as quietly as Ashlyn had ever heard her. The brunette’s body spasmed and twitched, her legs both lifting up off of the ground as she curled in on herself while the orgasm took her. Ashlyn pulled her up and held her in her arms, most of her body off of the hard bench, while she rode out her high. The keeper kissed her head and her neck and her cheeks and her mouth while they waited a couple of minutes for Ali to recover. 

They heard more noises from the basement, laughter this time and what sounded like a chair scraping across the floor. Their eyes went wide at the thought of somebody coming out of one of those doors to go upstairs and discovering them. Ashlyn stood up and quickly slid Ali’s free leg back into her panties before helping her to her feet. She pulled them up and then carefully slid the black dress back down over those incredible hips and thighs. Ali, meanwhile, tried to make sure everything on the top half of her body was where it was supposed to be. She fussed with her hair a little bit and ran her hands across her cheeks and under her eyes while checking Ashlyn’s upper half at the same time. There was a big smudge of her lipstick on the keeper’s chest, just where her button up shirt collar opened. She licked her thumb and rubbed at it as Ashlyn stood up and took her hand. They took one last look behind them to make sure they hadn’t dropped anything or left anything and then moved quickly to the bottom of the stairs. They heard a door open behind them and then a man’s voice spoke harshly and loudly to them in German. Ashlyn froze and was stunned when Ali, after only a quick pause, turned around, giggled drunkenly, and replied.

“Auf der suche nach dem bad” she giggled again and clutched her wife’s arm for balance that she didn’t really need.

Ashlyn finally caught on, recognizing the German word for bathroom in her wife’s answer.

“Oh geez, I’m so sorry” Ashlyn turned to help sell the ruse. “I’ve never been here before” she shrugged sheepishly at the man who was now standing only three feet in front of them. “She said the bathrooms were down here, but she’s a little drunk...” the keeper chuckled and held her breath.

Ali reached forward towards the round, middle-aged man with the frown on his face and giggled some more, leaning heavily into Ashlyn so the blonde had to use both hands to hold her up. The man grumbled something at them and pointed to the top of the stairs. He said several more words as they made their way up the stairs and Ashlyn was pretty sure she recognized the German word for ‘tourist’ and the common phrase for ‘piss off’.

“Oh my fucking God” Ali laughed when they finally made it to the street, holding her wife in a side hug as they walked quickly away from the club.

Their bodies were still thrumming with excitement and terror and desire and they both felt giddy and euphoric about their daring escape. Ali couldn’t believe they had just done that. Ashlyn couldn’t believe Ali had let them just do that. The brunette pulled her wife along, walking fast and seeming like she wanted to break into a run.

“Aw, don’t you want to dance anymore sweetheart?” Ashlyn teased.

“Holy shit Ashlyn” Ali’s eyes were like saucers as she looked up at her keeper. “I can’t believe we just fucking did that!”

“Yeah we did” the blonde grinned mischievously and laughed along with her blushing wife before shouting out her next sentence to all of Dusseldorf. “Best night in Germany ever!!”


	31. EUROs Championship

All day Saturday one of them would giggle and blush and the other would know exactly what they were thinking about. Their sexy romp at the club. It went on all day long. Neither of them had any regrets but they were both still mildly shocked that they had done it. It was a marvelous secret to share and they promised they would keep it just between the two of them. Ashlyn knew, of course, that Ali was such a terrible liar that if Sydney or Kyle somehow brought this up in conversation that her wife would be putty in their hands. The keeper didn’t mind though. She didn’t care if Sydney or Kyle knew. But she also knew that Ali didn’t want anybody else to know. It’s just how she was. It didn’t mean she didn’t love it or Ashlyn. It just meant that she was still shy about people knowing about her sex life, maybe not as much as she used to be, and that was just fine with the blonde.

ESPN wanted both Broadcast teams in Dortmund for a production meeting followed by a thank you dinner for what had been a very successful tournament for the company. The final was to be played Sunday at 5pm and the whole country was going insane with excitement because Germany had a very good chance of beating Iceland to win the cup. Some of the broadcast team were flying out right after the final while others, like Ashlyn and Ali, were flying out on Monday instead. Ashlyn, at her wife’s insistence, took them to Duisburg Saturday on their way to Dortmund so she could show Ali where she used to live. They had a really nice, relaxing day wandering around the much smaller city, stopping for lunch and some sightseeing before getting on the train for the 70-minute ride to Dortmund in the afternoon. Ali loved the fact that Duisburg was a harbor city and had museums about ships and waterways and fishermen. It made her happy to know that Ashlyn might have found some comfort or familiarity from that while she was living there. She hadn’t inherited the big old house yet, Ali knew, but the keeper’s childhood summers spent in the harbor town of Gloucester must have made Duisburg seem a tiny bit less foreign.

Saturday at dinner, Ali had another one of the many starstruck moments that came with being married to Ashlyn Harris. She found herself sitting at a table with Caroline Seger, Sylvia Neid, both of their wives, and Birgit Prinz and her husband. Holy fucking shit. Just like any dedicated women’s soccer fan, Ali knew who they all were and had watched and admired them for years. They had a lovely time, the whole group, and decided to go out for drinks after dinner. They ended up holding court in the corner of a biergarten near the hotel they were all staying at. Everybody taking turns telling stories and laughing. They spoke as much English as possible so Ashlyn and Caroline could understand everything, but if they slipped into German Ali translated for the two blonde soccer players as well as Caroline’s wife. 

Ashlyn wanted Ali’s last day in Germany to be a good one. They only had until 3pm on Sunday though, then the keeper had to report to the huge stadium, Signal Iduna Park, to get ready for the 80,000+ fans that were going to fill the sold-out stadium for one of the biggest football games, male or female, in years. It was a little bit unfortunate that Dortmund was the least historic city they had visited during Ali’s whole trip. Most of the city had been destroyed in WWII and had been rebuilt afterwards. There were a few castles that still stood in various states of disrepair, and a handful of buildings that had survived the bombs. Dortmund had been an important industrial city, generating almost all of its revenue from the coal and steel industries. But now it was one of the greenest cities in the entire country, switching over to technology services and becoming the most sustainable city in Germany. It was sometimes called ‘the green metropolis’ of the Westphalia state.

So instead of touring ancient buildings and architecture – which she knew Ali would love, Ashlyn took her wife on a tour of the beautiful parks, waterways and other green spaces throughout the city. They ended up spending most of their time at one of the biggest botanical gardens in the world – Botanischer Garten Rombergpark. It was huge and was comprised of an arboretum, four different greenhouses, a historic English landscape park with monuments, a terrace with palm trees, and some of the largest trees in that area of the country. Ali couldn’t have loved their day any more. As long as she got to be as close as possible to the love of her life she couldn’t have cared less what they did, but she went out of her way to praise and thank Ashlyn for putting together such a beautiful and thoughtful day. The keeper had even arranged for a picnic lunch to be brought to them while they were at Rombergpark. Sylvia Neid had overheard her making arrangements the night before at the hotel, even helping her with a bit of German translation for some of the specifics. The old coach had teased her about it while they were working with the concierge and the sous chef, but later, as they went back to the elevators to go to their rooms, she admitted what a wonderful idea it was.

“She’s very lucky, your warrior princess” Sylvia nodded and smiled at the keeper as they waited for the elevator.

“No, I’m the lucky one” Ashlyn looked down shyly. “Nothing I am today would have been possible without her. Nothing” she smiled as she thought about how influential her wife had been in every phase of her career from the very beginning of their relationship. “I’d be a retired keeper that nobody even remembered anymore. And I wouldn’t have had one clue what to do with myself next.”

“That’s good then” she nodded again. “And you have helped her career also. She wouldn’t be running your company without you. Keep that in mind my friend” she winked as the elevator dinged and opened in front of them. “And always try to keep this great love you have for each other alive, no matter what. That’s all the advice this old woman will give you” she chuckled and stepped onto the elevator with the keeper close behind her.

“Old woman, right” Ashlyn laughed softly. “I hope I look half as good as you do when I’m...your age.” 

She almost said the number 61 but caught herself in the nick of time. Sylvia still looked great. She had been blessed with gorgeous bone structure and good genes apparently. Ashlyn had watched what she ate and drank that night and none of it was life-prolonging. The keeper had always said that age was only a number and teased every one of her friends who had worried about hitting a certain milestone as they grew up. But for the first time in her life, she felt like she was aging. Turning 40 was slowly creeping up on her and she couldn’t pretend it wasn’t any more. Ali had turned 41 on the fourth day of her visit to Germany and Ashlyn had taken her out to a fancy and expensive dinner in Frankfurt on their first night in that beautiful city. They had rented a car and toured a vineyard outside of Stuttgart and then visited the Porsche museum before taking an afternoon train up to Frankfurt that day. Ashlyn couldn’t have cared less what age Ali had turned and that was the God’s honest truth. It just didn’t matter to her. 33, 37, 41, they were all the same to Ashlyn and she was quite sure it wouldn’t matter ten or twenty years from now either. But now she was starting to feel like turning 40 was a big deal. This was something about the keeper coming to terms with her own mortality, she guessed. Ashlyn thought she had spent more time than most people her age had, thinking about death and dying and experiencing close calls for herself and the people she loved. But this aging thing...it just felt different. 

“Oh, you’ll look twice as good as me and you know it” Sylvia teased and nudged Ashlyn’s arm. 

“Well, Caroline will put us both to shame for sure” Ashlyn chuckled. “She still looks the exact same as she did 20 years ago!”

“Those Swedes” Sylvia shook her head. “They have some fountain of youth up there or something. It’s just not fair” they both laughed.

“Thanks again for your help. I thought I was doing ok, but boy was I ordering the wrong thing” Ashlyn giggled.

“You’re welcome. And I will use your great idea on my wife and take all the credit for it” she slapped Ashlyn on the back and laughed out loud.

“Fair enough, fair enough” the keeper grinned.

Ali loved the picnic. When Ashlyn left her to wait for a few minutes by a little footbridge over a quaint little pond, the brunette was intrigued. When the blonde came walking across the footbridge fifteen minutes later with a big picnic basket in her hands, a small wine cooler case strapped across her back, and a huge grin on her face, Ali covered her mouth with both hands in surprise and then burst into tears.

“Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” Ashlyn jogged across the bridge and knelt next to her wife who had folded herself down onto her knees as her emotions swept over her. The keeper put down the heavy picnic basket, grunted a little bit under the weight, and rubbed a hand over her wife’s back as she cried. “Honey, what’s the matter? Are you ok?”

“I’m fiiiine...” she cried and whined, hands still covering the bottom half of her face.

“Ok...ummmm...” Ashlyn wasn’t sure what was happening and didn’t know what to do. Her wife hadn’t cried like this – for no apparent reason, since her last pregnancy when her hormones were all over the place. “I love you baby. I’m right here...whatever you need.”

“I know...you’re perfect...” Ali gasped through her tears, dropping her hands to her thighs and turning her head towards her keeper. “I just...” she sniffed, “it’s not fair how perfect you are...I can’t...” she shook her head and closed her eyes for a second, “I wanted this trip to be perfect for you.” The brunette wiped her face with both of her hands and sniffed again. “This was supposed to be for you” she pouted and tilted her head as she met Ashlyn’s eyes. “And here you are,” she sighed and gave her wife a half smile, “doing the most perfect thing for me instead. I can’t beat that Ash. No matter how hard I try, you just... you’re always blowing me away.”

“So, are you mad at me?” the keeper frowned, not sure if she had screwed up or not.

“How the hell could I possibly be mad at you?” Ali shook her head again, with a small smile on her face. “You’re fucking perfect.”

An hour later, after finding a lovely spot and enjoying their delicious picnic lunch, they finished the half-bottle of wine and lay back on the blanket. They were side by side, fingers intertwined between them, basking in the beautiful sunlight that filtered down through the leaves of the tree above them.

“I’m sorry this isn’t your tree from Frankfurt.”

“I’m not” Ali squeezed her hand. “That tree is making lots of kids happy down there. And this tree, this tree is a pretty good tree too.”

They were quiet for a few minutes, listening to the birds and the breeze and the voices of other people in the park. 

“You have made this trip perfect for me you know” Ashlyn spoke quietly and neither woman took their eyes off of the leaves above them. “Just by being here, it’s better than perfect. And I know you don’t believe that, but I’m telling you...it’s the truth.”

“You don’t have to try and make me feel better about it babe, it’s ok. It’s not your fault. I’ve always known that I wouldn’t be able to compete with you when it came to the grand gestures” she shrugged. “Ask Syd. We talked about it right after you and I finally got together” she sighed. “Usually I’m ok with it...but something about today just really got to me. I tried so hard to make this trip special for you...”

“But you did make it special for me Al” the keeper interrupted, turning her head to look at her wife. “From the very first morning in Munich when you woke me up after our nap” she wagged her eyebrows, making Ali blush and chuckle at the sexy memory. “And then, like the day could get any better,” she teased, “you took me to watch surfing! I mean, talk about a perfect fucking day...”

“Ok, ok” Ali squeezed her hand and leaned over for a quick kiss.

“And that was just Munich. We weren’t in Stuttgart very long but before we left, you managed to take me to the Porsche museum, which I know you would never have chosen to visit if you weren’t being extra sweet to me. And that’s what you always do for me baby. You could have zero interest in something but you’ll go there with me and let me take my time and talk with me about it and even try and learn as much as you can about it – just so we can talk even more about it. That’s everything Al.”

“You do the same thing for me though.”

“Sometimes, but not as often as you honey. I never really thank you for it either. So...thank you” Ashlyn leaned over for a soft kiss, using her free hand to cup her wife’s cheek. “And then Frankfurt was...I really don’t think I’ll ever be able to tell you how much being there with you meant to me” she got a little choked up. “I know that’s a very special place for you and I’ll never truly understand everything it means to you. But, now I have a good idea of what some of it was like. Thank you so much for sharing that part of you with me. I know it’s a big deal to you and I want to make sure you know that’s it a big deal for me too.”

Ali propped herself up on her elbow and leaned over her wife, tenderly stroking her cheek with her free hand. Hazel eyes met cinnamon ones and pure love and devotion transferred between them before the brunette brought their lips together in a deep kiss.

“I love you so much Ashlyn.”

“So you did make this trip perfect for me baby. I couldn’t have asked for anything more” Ashlyn smiled emotionally at her wife and tried to keep her voice strong. “Don’t you see that?”

“Yeah, when you put it that way, I guess” the brunette smiled again. “I’m ok either way. I don’t know why I got so upset before. I think you just always amaze me with how sweet and thoughtful you are to me. I just got overwhelmed or something when I saw you with the picnic lunch.” She rolled her eyes and chuckled. “So good babe, you’re too fucking good. I’ll never ever get over it honey. Thank you.”

They stayed there a little while longer and then reluctantly got up, packed things away and started to walk back to the park entrance. They hugged each other close, walking arm-in-arm and enjoying the end of the surprisingly emotional afternoon they had shared. Ali chuckled as they made it out to the street and looked for a taxi.

“What’s so funny?”

“You” Ali squeezed her hip and grinned at her. “You listed off a lot of the things we did this trip that were perfect for you and you forgot the public sex” she leaned closer and whispered the last part near her keeper’s ear. “Guess it wasn’t that memorable” the brunette shrugged and quirked an eyebrow.

“Holy shit you’re right” Ashlyn’s eyes went wide. “I swear, that was so hot I think my brain can’t believe it was real or something” she shook her head. “Talk about perfect. Wow.”

They shared a soft, loving look and pulled each other closer. Ashlyn stopped walking and put the picnic basket down at her feet before wrapping both arms around her wife’s back. They embraced for a long few minutes, just standing there and holding one another. Ali tucked her forehead under Ashlyn’s chin and held on to her lower back tightly, patting her t-shirt every once in a while.

“This has been like a dream, kind of” the brunette offered softly. “I don’t want it to be over...I don’t want to go home...”

Her final words were so quiet that Ashlyn could barely hear them. She knew Ali felt horrible guilt every time she had a thought like that – like not going home to their kids. She knew her brunette didn’t really mean it and that she would give her life any day for any one of their children. But the keeper also knew exactly what her wife was saying. It had been an incredible vacation that neither of them would forget any time soon and Ashlyn didn’t want it to end either. Except that she had been gone twice as long and was missing her kids more than she ever thought was possible. She had been careful not to talk about it with Ali because she didn’t want her to feel even guiltier about missing them or not missing them herself. But Ashlyn’s heart, as full as it was of her undying love for the brunette, was aching for her children.

“I know baby” she cooed as she pressed a kiss into Ali’s forehead. “But just like always, we’ll hold on to this special time together and we’ll frame some pictures of it and we’ll tell the stories to everybody...and that’ll hold us until we can go on the next trip. Right?”

“See? There you go being perfect again Ash” she kissed her wife’s neck and then stood up to face her, still holding each other at arm’s length. “Always saying just what I need to hear” she smiled. “Now put those long arms of yours to work and get a picture of us here by these flowers” she nodded towards the climbing roses covering the section of stone wall they were standing next to, just outside the entrance to the park. “And make it a good one. I want to remember our perfect picnic.”

//

The Championship game was a terrific match. Talk about a David versus Goliath story. Germany was expected to roll over Iceland. All of woso was happy because if Germany, the home team, won then that was a nice thing that everybody sort of responded to. ‘Home team wins major tournament’ was always a great headline and easy for sports fans to appreciate. But if Germany lost that meant that little, tiny Iceland would win and that was the feel-good and Cinderella story all rolled up in one. Even the Germans, as devastated as they would be to lose the Final, would have a hard time begrudging the small but tough Icelanders. The game was slow to develop and Caroline Seger commented that it would be impossible for the Icelanders not to feel all the energy from the huge German crowd and struggle to find their composure at the beginning of the match. Broadcast team 1, Sylvia and Caroline, were in the booth as usual while Team 2, Birgit and Ashlyn, were down on the sidelines. The producers were smart enough to rotate through them all to get their unique perspectives on the game itself, the refs, the condition of the pitch and the attitude and demeanor of the players and coaches. Germany had a 2-0 lead throughout most of the game but it never felt secure. The stadium somehow sensed that it wouldn’t be enough. Iceland mounted a furious comeback in the last twenty minutes of the game and tied the game at 2-2. Every single player for Iceland seemed like they were 7 feet tall and twice as fast as any German on the pitch during those frantic twenty minutes. They won every aerial duel and made every tackle and won every 1 v 1 take-on while the Germans did their best to stay calm and controlled. 

The head official called for two minutes of stoppage time and everybody breathed a sigh of relief, hoping both teams could just hold on for the overtime period and a little bit of a fresh start. No-one watching, either in the stadium or at home, wanted the match to end as the clock moved into the 92nd minute. Even the Germans were stunned when one of their most veteran players found her way up the right flank for the millionth time that game, unwilling to give up just yet. The outside back picked her head up to see what options she had in the box and lofted a beautiful ball into the fray. Nobody was sure if it was a cross or a shot and the wily veteran wouldn’t admit a thing after the game, but that ball sailed and dipped and fooled Iceland’s keeper as it dropped into the net over by the back post. The stadium erupted and Ashlyn and Birgit could feel the massive surge of energy hit them as they stood in their separate places on the sidelines. It was unreal. The official blew her whistle three times to signal the end of the match and everybody went crazy. The Germans picked up their 33-year old right back and carried her to the center of the pitch as all of the bench players rushed out to meet them. Birgit Prinz hustled out to join them and got an emotional, raw, player’s perspective interview with the new national hero and several other teammates. It was so loud inside the stadium that it was almost impossible to hear what anybody was saying.

Ashlyn, on the other hand, waited for the devastated Icelanders to huddle up and get themselves as ready as they could be to talk about the gut-wrenching loss. There were a couple of players who played in the NWSL and Ashlyn went to them first, happy to see a friendly, familiar face even in such an awful moment. The interview was sad and poignant as the players talked about how proud they were of their team’s performance in the tournament. Ashlyn wrapped up her interview segment with a quick note about how powerful it was to witness the pride and optimism the players from Iceland had displayed even though their hearts were all broken in a million pieces.

“It’s that kind of courage and determination that will keep this team competing internationally at a high level for a long time to come” she summarized with conviction and admiration easy to see on her face. “They have a lot to be proud of and it’s truly been a joy to watch them these last three weeks. “Pakka per fyrir” she said into the camera, thanking the team in their native language and impressing both Caroline and Sylvia up in the booth.

Ali grinned when she heard it, watching and listening with the other wives and Birgit’s husband in the ‘green room’ outside the broadcast booth. Ashlyn had mangled the pronunciation a little bit on the ‘per’, which was a two-syllable word believe it or not, but had nailed the ‘pakka’ and the ‘fyrir’ and fans from Iceland were commenting all over social media about the thoughtful and considerate gesture. The brunette had practiced with her wife how to say ‘thank you’ in both Icelandic and German as they rode to the stadium earlier that afternoon. Ashlyn didn’t know which team she would be interviewing so she wanted to be prepared either way. And she already knew how to say ‘thank you’ in German – ‘Danke’ - almost everybody knew that. But she wanted to make sure she said it right, nevertheless. 

“That’s my girl” Ali whispered to herself as she smiled proudly at her beautiful keeper.

Ashlyn and Ali spent their last night in Germany out with their new friends. The two broadcast teams and their spouses went to dinner and then spent the rest of the evening laughing and drinking at a sports pub Sylvia knew well. It had several pub games you could play and, as usual, Ali excelled at most of them. It took her a few minutes to get the hang of Schock, a dice game she hadn’t played since her year abroad, but after a few rolls of the three dice it all started to come back to her. 

“Your warrior princess is full of surprises” Sylvia smiled at Ashlyn as they watched the brunette in action.

“You don’t even know the half of it” the keeper chuckled. “This is how we started” she looked around her at the pub and the games and the laughing, friendly people. “She kicked my ass at every single game we ever played” she beamed. “And I was sure we’d run out of games she could beat me at, but no, here’s Schock” she rolled her eyes. “Thanks for that” she playfully elbowed the ex-coach who just laughed at her. “The only time I ever beat her when it wasn’t just a fluke was when she was pregnant. For some reason all those hormones fucked up her gamesmanship.”

“She’s good about the winning too” Sylvia nodded approvingly. “She rubs it in because she earned that right, but just enough so nobody feels too badly about it.”

“That’s my girl” Ashlyn sighed contentedly.

They were all invited to play in a game of flunkyball out in the courtyard but Sylvia politely declined for them. The non-Germans in her group looked quizzically at her and she let Birgit and Ali explain why they didn’t really want to get involved in the popular drinking game. Ashlyn seemed a little disappointed after she understood how it worked, but she knew Sylvia had made the right decision for them. That’s all they needed. Their last night to be some drunken competition where they all came out looking like idiotic assholes.

After a couple of hours of darts and foosball and Schock, and many many beers, they were ready to move on to a different spot to finish the night off. As they paid their bill they tried to decide which nightclub that would be. There was some debate between Birgit and Sylvia who were both speaking German very fast while the rest of them, except Birgit’s husband, looked on dumbly. Even Ali had a difficult time catching most of it.

“What’s going on?” Ashlyn asked her wife, speaking quietly so no-one else could hear them.

“They’re talking about two clubs, one’s a lesbian club and one’s just a regular club...” the brunette explained what little she had gotten out of the conversation.

It wasn’t an argument by any means, which was hard to determine sometimes given the way the German language could often sound harsh. Birgit wanted the group to go to the lesbian club because three of the four couples were lesbians, she finally spoke English to the whole group again.

“Birgie, it’s ok” Ashlyn patted her gently on the back. “We’ll still be lesbians even if we’re at a straight club” she winked. “It doesn’t rub off that easily.”

Everybody laughed at the joke and Birgit rolled her eyes and chuckled.

“And we” she motioned at her husband, “will be just as straight at the lesbian club” she shrugged. “We are 3 to 1 in our group. We’ll go to the lesbian club, ok hotshot?” she looked to Ashlyn, knowing the woman she had become real friends with over the past three weeks would back her up.

“You heard her” Ashlyn smiled and started to move through the group towards the door. “The Prinz has spoken. Let’s go.” 

They danced for another couple of hours, enjoying a good deal of privacy even though most of the women in the club recognized at least one member or another in their group. Sylvia, Birgit, Caroline and Ashlyn were all approached at different times by different groups of fans asking for selfies. They all agreed and were happy to see that the requests kept coming at a slow, respectful pace. Before they left, the whole group posed for a couple of pictures, the owner of the club asking for permission to post it to their website and other social media. Ali was impressed that she had even asked. But then she remembered that she wasn’t in the US where nobody asked permission for anything anymore. The group agreed but made the owner take a photograph with Sylvia’s phone too so they could each have their own copy and remembrance of one of the most fun nights they had ever been lucky enough to experience.

“Why are you awake?” Ashlyn’s raspy voice croaked out in the dark hotel room several hours later.

The happy couple had gone back to the hotel and enjoyed a slow, languid night of sex. They had done more worshipping and adoring of their bodies as they gave each other more powerful orgasms than they usually did. The luxury of time and complete privacy aiding them in their mission of ultimate glorification. Ashlyn had been asleep for a little over an hour and was lying flat on her back with her head up on the pillow where it belonged. They were both still naked, relishing in the last chance to feel skin on skin all night long before shifting back into mom mode once they got home. Ali was curled around her wife’s side, but on the right side and down lower by her stomach. Her right leg was thrown over Ashlyn’s thighs, but low, just above her knees. Ali’s face was pressed into the side of her keeper’s body, right up next to the lower part of her ribcage. Her right arm was across Ashlyn’s hips and bent up so her hand was near her belly button. It was moving in slow, soft circles, gently tracing the keeper’s spiderweb-like stretchmarks while the brunette stared off into space. The room was silent and very dark – the only light coming from the bathroom and the door there that was open a crack. It was just after 4:00am.

“Can’t sleep” Ali’s reply was just as raw, tired and overworked from the soccer final and all the boisterous celebrating they had done all night long. She didn’t stop moving her hand or lift her head to look at her wife. She stayed just where she was, entranced.

“Duh” Ashlyn moved her right arm down and rested it on her wife’s back, enjoying how warm her little furnace always felt. She gently patted Ali’s skin. “Why can’t you sleep, silly?” 

Ali sighed and chuckled at how funny her keeper’s raspy voice sounded saying the word ‘silly’.

“I don’t know, just thinking I guess. Nothing bad though” she leaned up and kissed the side of Ashlyn’s breast. “Why are you awake?”

“Because that tickles.”

“Oh honey I’m sorry” Ali stopped moving her hand and held it firmly in place on her wife’s stomach. “I didn’t even realize I was doing that. I’m so sorry babe, I’ll stop. Go back to sleep love.”

They were quiet for a few minutes and Ali, true to her word, kept her hand still. And that’s how the blonde knew she was still wide awake. Ashlyn knew it would take willpower and concentration for her wife to keep her hand still.

“I’m thinking of getting that tattooed” the blonde offered quietly, making no reference to anything else but squeezing her fingers into Ali’s back.

“What?” Talk of new tattoos always got the brunette’s attention. “Getting what tattooed?”

“My stretchmarks...my spiderweb.”

“Really?” Ali’s voice was careful and thoughtful.

“Yeah, really” Ashlyn replied just as carefully. “Don’t you think that’s a good idea?”

The silence after the question gave the keeper her answer before Ali could even try to say something supportive.

“Do you mean cover it up?” she finally asked in a small voice.

“No, I would never do that” Ashlyn soothed, understanding her wife’s hesitance now. “I know how much you love my spiderweb” she smiled as she felt Ali’s soft fingertips moving across her stomach again. “I mean put the ink where the stretchmarks are, you know, make it an official tattoo.”

The brunette pressed her lips into Ashlyn’s side again, kissed her and then left them there for almost a full minute.

“I don’t know babe...I read it’s hard to do because the skin isn’t like the rest of your skin. It’s scar tissue and it’s just hard to know how it’ll hold the ink.”

“You read that?”

“Ummm, yeah, I did” Ali admitted shyly, closing her eyes and inadvertently tickling her keeper’s skin with her soft eyelashes.

“Why were you reading about tattooing stretchmarks?” Ashlyn looked down at the top of her wife’s head. “I thought you loved my...”

“Not you, Ash” Ali interrupted quickly, realizing her wife thought she wanted her to hide her beautiful spiderweb. “I do love your spiderweb” she got up on her elbow and turned her head to the left so she could meet her keeper’s eyes. “I was thinking about covering mine up. Not yours.”

Ashlyn cupped her cheek and smiled sweetly at her in the almost complete darkness. She was relieved to hear Ali confirm what she thought she knew – that the brunette loved her spiderweb. But she was worried that her wife felt as though she needed to cover her own stretchmarks. Ali had the long, kind of ragged, stripey kind of stretchmarks at each of her hips. They started just above each hip and travelled forward at a slightly downward angle for about six or eight inches, depending on exactly which mark you measured. The stretchmarks on her right hip stopped a few inches above her Penn State tattoo, which was lower and more inward on her body, almost level with the top of her mound. The stretchmarks on her left hip were mirror images of the ones on her right hip. The bottoms of the longest two stretchmarks in the group on her left hip actually ran into her sweet spot and the wave tattoo there. If you used your imagination you could pretend they were the beach to the right of the cresting wave. The brunette had first gotten them after Drew and then again, a bit more pronounced, after Josie. The marks after Josie’s pregnancy hadn’t faded as much as Drew’s had and, by this year, 2025, there had been twice as much time for Josie’s to fade. 

Ali had been disappointed for a long time by the way the stretchmarks interfered or forced themselves into her wave tattoo. But as they faded a little bit, over time, she had come to terms with them, or so Ashlyn had thought. The keeper had never been anything other than complimentary and supportive about them and she genuinely found them sexy and empowering and beautiful because of all her wife’s body had gone through to earn them. She wondered what had changed and when Ali had become less confident about her stretchmarks.

“But, why do you want to cover yours up Al? I love them...”

“I know honey” she interrupted and blushed a little as she dropped her eyes. “I know the whole spiel and I appreciate it and most of the time I’m right there with you.” She paused and took a breath as she lifted her eyes again. “But sometimes, I don’t know” she shrugged, “I fucking hate them and wish they weren’t there” she admitted and looked up sheepishly.

“Aw, baby, why didn’t you ever tell me?” Ashlyn caressed her wife’s shoulder.

“Oh, I don’t feel that way very often” she sighed. “And this isn’t about me anyway” she smiled warmly at the blonde. “This is about you and your spiderweb. I’m just telling you why I was reading about it, remember? I haven’t looked into it for over a year, ok?”

And with that, Ashlyn knew her wife was done talking about her own stretchmarks. And that meant she was ok about them, at least for the time being.

“Ok” Ashlyn returned the smile and brought her left hand down to her own stomach to feel the stretchmarks there. “Well, it sounds like I’d better talk to Naomi before I get too excited about it anyway. And I haven’t made up my mind yet, I was just starting to think about it. That’s all.”

“Ash, it’s your body and you know how I feel about you owning it and doing whatever you think is best...”

“Yeah, that’s not what you said when I ordered that brownie sundae the other night” she giggled and was happy when Ali joined her.

“You know what I mean” she playfully rolled her eyes at her wife. “But, for what it’s worth, I love this just the way it is” she leaned over and put her lips on Ashlyn’s stomach, placing a soft kiss to some of the spiderweb closest to her. She felt a tug in her core when she tasted her own passion that had found its way there during their earlier worship session. “If you feel like you need to add ink to it that’s fine” she shrugged and tried to control her rising libido. “But I don’t think it needs any. I just feel like it’s here for a reason, like the twins made this for you or something” she dropped her eyes again when she heard how silly her words sounded. “I know that’s ridiculous...but that’s how it feels to me.”

“Hey” Ashlyn said softly as she lifted her wife’s chin with her fingers. “Look at me Al...”

The brunette’s whiskey-colored eyes met Ali’s favorite hazel ones and she was surprised to see Ashlyn fighting back tears. They smiled at each other for a long moment before the keeper spoke again.

“That is probably one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever heard. I never thought about it that way before, but I love that. Why would I ever change one of their paintings? Especially their very first one?”

“Yeah?” Ali asked hopefully. “You really feel that way?”

“I absolutely feel that way honey” she smiled and seemed to have won the battle with her tears. “And I’m so happy that you woke me up at 4am to talk about this...” she teased and it took Ali a few seconds to pick up on it.

“Oh, zip it” the brunette giggled and playfully nipped at Ashlyn’s soft stomach.

“No, really, I mean, it’s not like we could have talked about it...oh, literally any other time tomorrow while we’re being held captive on an airplane!” she giggled and grimaced at a more painful bite from her wife and then pulled Ali up so they were face to face.

“I love you Ashlyn” Ali breathed out, an inch away from the lips she desperately wanted to kiss. “No matter what you decide.”

“I love you too baby” the keeper nuzzled their noses together and squeezed her wife’s bare ass with both hands as their lips met in a heated kiss. 

She moaned when she felt the brunette press her thigh up between her legs and saw how dark Ali’s eyes had gotten in the past twenty seconds. Ashlyn’s desire spiked and then she felt another twinge deep in core when her beautiful brunette spoke in a low, throaty voice.

“Show me.”


	32. Home Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Halloween everybody!!

If you could find a way to measure how much Ali and Ashlyn had enjoyed their time away together it would surely be an immense amount. If you took that amount and multiplied it by a thousand it still wouldn’t come close to how wonderful it felt when they walked through the mudroom door Monday afternoon. Their flight had landed at Boston’s Logan International Airport at 1:00pm and by the time they got through US Customs and baggage claim and then all the way up to the big old house it was just after 3:30pm. The timing was just right because the twins had just gotten up from their 3-hour power nap after lunch. They were still so sleepy and cute as they sat on Tammye and Carol’s laps with their sippy cups of juice and adorable nap head and faces. Deb had seen the car service drop them off in the driveway as she washed teething rings in the kitchen sink. She dried her hands quickly and got her phone ready to take some pictures of the moment the kids saw their moms. She moved quickly through the family room and dining room into the front hall where she waited outside the doorway to the front living room. It was the perfect vantage point to watch everybody in the front living room greet the two travelers once they emerged from the mudroom.

Josie was coloring, kneeling at the coffee table, while Drew played a hand-held video game on the other side of the couch with both dogs as seat mates. Deb caught Tammye’s eye, careful not to let Dodge see her from his spot on her lap, and nodded towards the mudroom door. The dogs perked up first, of course, as soon as they heard the mudroom door open. Persey started wagging her tail like crazy as soon as she spotted Ashlyn still in the mudroom. Just a moment later everybody went crazy with excitement when Ali and Ashlyn walked into the front living room with huge smiles on their faces. It was like a parade for ten whole minutes. Each kid and both dogs ran to their moms and hugged them and then moved away a little bit, unsure of exactly what to do next. Then they’d recover a minute later and rush at the returning travelers again. The dogs did laps around the room, nuzzling up against all four legs that they had missed. Persey spent a solid four minutes just standing between Ashlyn’s legs and wagging her tail as she watched the mini-parade. Both moms felt a little bad for the twins because it was obvious that they had just gotten up and didn’t know what the hell was happening. Talk about a rude awakening. But even through their cranky sleepy moods, both Lily and Dodge were happy to have their mothers home again and joined the parade and gave them hugs and kisses too. Deb did her best to get some good pictures and, for the most part, succeeded.

Ali and Ashlyn’s bodies were still six hours ahead, so by the time they finished putting the kids to bed at 8:30pm it felt like 2:30am to them. And they had gotten little, Ashlyn, to no, Ali, sleep the night before. Both women slept for a bit on the 8-1/2 hour flight to Boston that morning but not nearly enough. Their bodies and minds were exhausted but their hearts were full as they crawled into bed and fell fast asleep almost instantly. The only regret Ashlyn had in her head as it hit the pillow that night was that she had missed the end of Meg’s visit. Ken Krieger had driven her into the airport Friday afternoon after her 6th and final week of soccer camp had ended Thursday afternoon. Ashlyn knew it was going to happen, they all did. But the keeper felt the teenager’s absence right there in her full heart nonetheless and promised herself that she would call Meg first thing in the morning to tell her so. 

They both took Tuesday off and spent the day getting settled back in to the big old house and their kids’ lives. Tammye and Carol were staying through the rest of the week, looking forward to visiting with both Ashlyn and Ali. The brunette’s heart swelled and broke a little at the same time when Josie cried for Deb halfway through that first morning back.

“We’ll see Grandma at lunchtime little one” Ali soothed her, getting a fiery look and a quickly escalating temper tantrum in reply. 

Josie had her mother’s temper, her ‘Italian temper’ as Ashlyn referred to it, but it didn’t present itself very often. She was a pretty easy-going kid. Until she wasn’t. Her fuse was long but look out when she got to the end of it. Ali tried to control her own temper as she watched her four-year old daughter throw her little body against the couch in a blind rage. Ashlyn popped her head into the front living room from the front hall by the front door, her face full of concern. They had had a lazy morning and she had been upstairs getting the twins dressed with Tammye when she heard the screaming downstairs. Ali nodded at her to let her know she was on it and the blonde nodded back and returned to Dodge’s bedroom without saying a word. The brunette sat next to Josie and rested her hand on the little girl’s back to let her know she was there. She didn’t say anything or do anything except sit there and wait for the storm to pass. Persey waited cautiously nearby, sitting on the other side of Ali and whining every once in a while. Fifteen minutes later the little redhead sat up and sniffled as she caught her breath. After another minute she turned around and crawled into Ali’s lap, burying her head against her chest and grabbing onto her shirt with both fists. Persey stood up, wagged her tail and pushed her face into Josie’s leg on Ali’s lap.

“Thank you for calming down honey” the brunette kissed her daughter’s head and hugged her. “Are you ready to talk about why you were so upset?” she asked evenly as Persey jumped up onto the couch and lay down next to them, giving the little girl’s bare foot a lick.

Josie took a couple of big breaths and nodded her head. She opened one of her hands and patted Ali’s upper arm. Ali loved when any of the kids, or any kid anywhere for that matter, did that. Dodge was their best patter. He would pat your back almost every time you picked him up and held him and he had done it since he could first control his arms.

“Why were you so upset sweetheart?”

“I want Grandma” she blubbered out, starting to get worked up again.

“Shhhhh...don’t cry honey, it’s ok.” Ali rubbed her back and patted her leg, trying to keep another fit from happening. “Now that you’re calm again we can call Grandma and see what she’s doing. Does that sound like a good idea?”

“Ah-huh” Josie nodded.

“We could have called her earlier if you hadn’t been so upset” the brunette made sure to finish the lesson, no matter how much sympathy she had for her daughter. Ali knew Josie was just adjusting to the changing of the guard in the house. She understood, but it still wasn’t acceptable behavior. “Do you understand that Josie?” The little girl didn’t reply with words, but by snuggling closer into Ali’s neck. “If you had used your words and told me how upset you were getting I could have helped you. We could have tried to call Grandma right away.”

They were both quiet for another couple of minutes.

“Can we call Grandma now?” Josie picked her head up and looked into her mommy’s face. “Please?” she whined adorably.

“Oh I love your manners baby girl” Ali kissed her cheek and smiled at her. “Ok, let’s see if we can get her on the phone.”

On Wednesday things were back to normal for the young Krieger family. The kids all seemed to remember how things went when Mama and Mommy were around and fell into line pretty quickly. Ashlyn went up to The Academy for the first time in almost four weeks and spent the night, hoping to get back into the swing of things up there too. Ali brought everybody else, including Tammye and Carol, up the next day for the Thursday afternoon run around they had enjoyed the first three weeks of The Academy. It was Tammye and Carol’s first visit to the camp and they were both more than impressed. Ali apologized four times to Tammye for making her sit in the most challenging seat in the minivan – the one in the way back between the two car seats with Dodge and Lily.

“Oh I’m not afraid” Gigi quipped as she ducked her head and made her way to the back of the minivan. 

Carol had offered but Tammye had insisted that she wanted to do it. The seat itself wasn’t uncomfortable, but the shenanigans of the twins could range anywhere from cute and adorable to horrible and annoying. The two most important rules of the car were always still in play: no touching anybody else and no throwing anything. Ali put a DVD in the console on the dashboard and Scooby Doo popped up on the screen located up between the back of the two front seats. Ashlyn didn’t like to put a movie in for the kids because she thought it was a ridiculous luxury that should only be used for really long trips and then only sparingly. She claimed that the quiet time spent looking out the window of a car was important for every kid, whether they realized it or not. Ali couldn’t argue with her but that day she was trying to save Tammye from getting a huge headache on the 90-minute ride to Greenfield, NH.

“Be strong and firm Gigi” Ali encouraged as she made sure Drew and Josie were buckled in tight.

Tammye and Carol were also thrilled to finally see Whitney and meet her new baby. The lawyer was adjusting to new motherhood much better now that Becca was 4-1/2 months old. She had made a trip to The Academy all three weeks that Ashlyn was in Germany. Whitney wanted to make sure one of them was always around and checking in, even though Cat Whitehill, Niki Cross and Sydney Dwyer were all there full-time. She timed her trips right so Becca napped during the drive and then there were always plenty of eager arms waiting to hold and play with the new baby once she got there. That Thursday at the end of the 7th session of soccer camp was the first time Ashlyn and Whitney had been present at the same time since The Academy opened. Week 7 was more advanced, for girls in high school. And week 8, the final session, was geared for varsity teams and college teams looking for some preseason work and training. The guest coaches had shown up for them all summer long, as planned and scheduled, and Jane Sheldrick and Cat Whitehill had kept everything running like clockwork. Cat handled everything soccer related and Jane oversaw everything else.

“Hey Whit” Ali hugged her hello when the Krieger minivan full of bodies started walking towards the recreation deck that afternoon. The brunette hadn’t seen Whitney in almost a month and was very happy to greet her. “You look great” she enthused as they pulled apart. “Feeling good?”

“Yeah, I’m doing ok” the lawyer smiled sincerely. “I’m tired all the time” she chuckled and rolled her eyes, “but I’m good and so is Becca” she beamed.

“Not that I don’t love you or anything” Ali teased as she craned her neck to scan the area, “but where is that gorgeous goddaughter of mine anyway?”

Whitney laughed and turned to join her in the scan. They saw all four Krieger kids playing with the Cross and Dwyer kids and entertaining several of the high school aged campers who were making their way to the parking lot to load up and depart.

“Umm, she’s over there” Whitney pointed to the crest of the hill where they could just see Ashlyn’s head and chest, with Becca tucked against it, coming into view. She was surrounded by five or six campers and Niki and they were all talking animatedly about something. “But good luck. She won’t let anybody take her” the lawyer chuckled.

“Well we’ll just see about that” Ali accepted the challenge, set her jaw and walked towards her wife after squeezing Whitney’s arm.

As soon as the keeper looked up and saw Ali coming her way she knew she would have to share the baby. She smiled when her wife closed the distance and reached for baby Becca.

“Here you go Becca, here’s your other godmother, Ali” she cooed into the little girl’s cheek and then carefully handed her to the brunette while Niki and everybody else kept walking.

“Hi baby girl, you’re getting so big and strong and beautiful” the brunette said sweetly. “I’ve missed you little bug.” 

Ali kissed Becca’s head and blew a soft raspberry into her cheek making the baby giggle and clap her hands. Ashlyn put her hand on Ali’s lower back and kissed her cheek, breathing in the scent she had missed since the day before.

“Hi baby, I missed you” she purred into Ali’s ear.

“Mmmmm, I missed you too” the brunette turned her face and met her wife’s lips with a soft kiss. “Everything ok?”

“Yeah, everything’s good here” Ashlyn replied and then locked eyes with Ali. “How are you?”

“I told you I’m fine Ash, I really am. I don’t know if it’s because I’m still blissed out from vacation or what, but it didn’t rattle me this time” she answered honestly as she smiled at the baby and let her grab onto her fingers.

Ali’s third ultrasound had been postponed from the last week of July to two days after their return from Germany. Ashlyn hated to stay at The Academy that Wednesday night because she wanted to be with her wife to comfort her and soothe her worry and her nerves. But Ali told her she would be ok because she really felt like she would be. And she texted her keeper Wednesday morning after the procedure to make sure she knew she was ok, knowing Ashlyn would worry until they connected.

“I know, I just...wanted to make sure” Ashlyn smiled softly at her wife and rubbed her lower back again. “I love you.”

“I love you too Ash” she blinked up at the blonde and returned her warm smile, holding her gaze for a few seconds. “And I love you too Miss Becca bug” she turned her head and grinned at the baby. “Don’t I? Yes I do” she giggled back at the little girl as she and her wife started to walk back towards the rest of the group. 

She loved the way Ashlyn’s hand on her lower back made her feel – safe, protected, loved. Ali wasn’t sure what the results of the ultrasound would be but she knew that with her keeper by her side, she would tackle anything. Maybe that’s why she hadn’t gotten freaked out by this one? Maybe she was finally settling in to her new normal. Maybe she was getting used to the idea of lying there in stirrups while a stranger inserted a probing wand into her vagina, helping her hunt for the cancer she didn’t know if she would get or not. Ali knew she would also be anxious as she waited the four or five days for the results, but other than that she had really been trying to come to terms with the procedures and what they meant. She had only had three of them so far but she could already tell the work she had done by herself and with Mattie was paying off. Alexandra Krieger held the power to mold and shape the way she felt about these ultrasounds. Not anybody else. Nobody would blame her if she found them unsettling or disturbing or frightening. But Ali wanted to find a way to embrace them. She knew she wasn’t going to love them – come on, there was only one person in the world she wanted to be doing what those ultrasound technicians did to her every three months. But maybe, just maybe, she could learn to appreciate them and look at them as a tool or a weapon in her arsenal that she could use to help her hunt.

// 

The following Wednesday afternoon Kyle and Nathan stopped at the big old house on their way to the fancy spa and resort hotel in Chatham on Cape Cod. They had just dropped off Luna at Ken and Vicki’s house for the five-day weekend they were about to enjoy in celebration of their fourth wedding anniversary.

“You guys really love that place” Ali smiled at her brother while she changed out of her work clothes up in her bedroom. Kyle had sprawled out on the bed with his hands locked behind his head and his legs crossed at the ankles. He didn’t look at his sister as she changed but he didn’t look away either. They had always been comfortable changing clothes in front of each other, but drew the line at nudity. “I think it’s so sweet that you go back there so much. So romantic” she giggled as she pulled on shorts and a t-shirt and put her hair up in a messy bun at the back of her head.

“Well if you guys hadn’t gotten married at a stinking castle for God’s sake” he rolled his eyes dramatically, “you could visit it again just as often as we go back to The Chatham Bars Inn” he shrugged. “It is pretty romantic though, isn’t it?” he giggled. “And oh my God, Nate is always all over me when we’re there...it’s soooooooo amazing.”

“Ugh, Kyle!” Ali whined and made a disgusted face. “I do not need to know that, geez” she shook her head. “Now I have to go downstairs and pretend, all through dinner, not to know that he’s going to jump your bones later tonight...”

“Just the one bone...” Kyle cackled.

“Kyyy-le...” she whined again, stretching his name into a two-syllable word.

“And it’s usually me who...”

She cut him off sharply and gave him a stern look so he knew she was serious.

“Stop talking!” she shouted and quirked her eyebrow. “I have made it all this time without knowing which of you is the top or the bottom and I do not want to know anything about your sex life!”

“I hate to interrupt what sounds like a conversation perfect for every mother’s ears...” Deb’s voice came from the bottom of the backstairs. “But 1 – stop yelling. And 2 – one of you needs to come help me in the kitchen and one of you needs to come help Nate with the kids.”

“Happy princess?” Kyle sneered playfully at his sister as she walked around the foot of the bed towards the door to the backstairs. “Now you’ve got Debbers thinking about how much sex Nate and I are gonna have tonight too” he teased as he swung his legs over the side of the bed, about to stand up.

“Shut up, jerk” she punched him hard in the arm and laughed as she approached him. “It’s your fault, not mine.”

“Oh no it’s not” he grabbed her wrist and pulled her onto the bed, giving her a noogie and making her scream and flail her arms. “This is what you get for being a bratty princess.”

“Ow! Stop! Kyle!” she said through breathless laughter as he rolled her over and pinned her to the bad, flat on her back. “Don’t you dare...” she warned, threateningly. She was helpless as Kyle sat on her stomach with his knees on her arms.

“Or what?” he challenged with an arrogant laugh.

As desperate as both of their voices and words sounded, there was nothing but playfulness in their eyes as Kyle got ready to torture his sister and Ali struggled hopelessly against his strength and weight. Just as he started to tickle her and her scream filled the room again, Drew and Deb came up the backstairs, Lily in her Grandma’s arms. Josie and Nathan, carrying Dodge, came into the room from the second-floor hallway.

“Mommy! Mommy!” Drew called out as he climbed onto the bed while Deb plopped Lily down next to Ali’s head.

Nathan put Dodge down on his mother’s shins and the little boy promptly stood up and started tugging on Kyle’s arm while Josie struggled to get onto the bed. Her little legs just weren’t quite big enough and Nathan lifted her so she could join her siblings as they came to their mother’s rescue.

“No unky Ky. Not mommy” the little redhead pointed her finger at Kyle from her spot near Ali’s arm and Kyle’s leg.

Deb went back down the stairs again chuckling to herself as she heard all the little voices rallying to their mother’s defense. Nathan followed her so he could help her in the kitchen.

“So you two children are in charge of the rest of the children. Mmm-kay?” he asked sarcastically. “Mmm-kay” he nodded in reply to himself.

All four kids tried to push and pull Uncle Kyle off of their mommy. The problem was that Ali couldn’t defend herself from any of them. Lily stepped right on her face trying to get to Kyle, while Josie fell hard against her breast as she tried to push his arm away. 

“Ow! Oooof” Ali groaned. “Ky...I need my arms...”

Kyle reached behind him and pulled Dodge, who was climbing up his back by grabbing onto the collar of his shirt, over his shoulders. He placed him gently on Ali’s chest and pushed Drew back towards the head of the bed with his other arm. It was only then that he realized what his sister had said and why.

“Oh shit, sorry sis...” he quickly lifted his knees and freed her arms.

“Mommy! Unky Ky said a bad word!” Drew pointed out dramatically.

Josie launched herself at him with a glorious squeal that sounded like a tiny Minnie Mouse on helium. Kyle caught her and watched while Ali pulled Dodge off of her chest and put him above her head at the top of the bed where Drew was calculating his next move. Lily landed on her mother’s chest, bum first and with a giggle and clap of her hands.

“Oooof” Ali grunted again. “Alright guys, let’s get him!”

She lifted her hips as hard as she could and unseated him just enough so he was slightly off-balance. As soon as she saw that, she twisted and pushed him over on the other side of the bed onto his side. Drew took full advantage and started leaning on Kyle’s shoulder, trying his hardest to hold the big man down. Josie was safely cradled in Kyle’s arm as Lily crawled over to him from her mother’s chest, smacking his hip and side with loud giggles. Dodge was the last to engage but that’s only because he was the farthest away and somehow knew enough not to trample on top of his mother to get to the uncle they were supposed to be attacking. He finally joined in with Ali, following her down to Kyle’s legs and sitting on them just in front of her.

“Oh my God, you guys got me!” Kyle pretended to be pinned and unable to move. He released Josie from his arm as a last gasping breath escaped his lips. “Go JoJo, be free...”

Everyone was quiet for a minute as they watched their uncle’s lifeless form. Just when all four of them started to get concerned he laughed out loud and dragged himself to the center of the bed, bringing Drew with him.

“He’s ok guys” Ali giggled as she disentangled herself and stood by the side of the bed. “He was just pretending.”

But they didn’t care. They were all giggling and laughing and their faces were pink and grinning as they clambered all over Kyle’s big, strong body. It was one of Ali’s absolute favorite sounds in the entire world – that giggle that just keeps going and comes from deep in their little bellies. She stood there and beamed at the friendly wrestling match, only leaning in to assist when someone was about to get hit in the head with a stray foot or elbow. Kyle’s laughter was beautiful too and the brunette started to get emotional as she thought about what a great father he would be. She knew he was nervous about becoming a foster parent but she also knew that if he would just believe in himself half as much as everybody else who knew him did, he’d be terrific. Some little boy or girl was going to have two of the best parents in the world if the state of New York would just hurry the fuck up and approve Kyle and Nathan as foster parents. Ali watched and laughed along with five of her favorite people for another couple of minutes. Then she could tell the mood was shifting. Dodge looked more determined. Josie looked aggravated. Drew looked like he was trying not to cry so he must have taken a shot from somebody that Ali had missed. And Lily just looked adorable as she smiled and giggled and tried to keep her balance on the bouncing bed.

“Ok kiddos, that’s enough. It’s time to settle down and get ready for dinner” Ali tried to bring the raucous scene back under control. She picked Josie up before she could act on her aggravation and put her on the floor before grabbing Dodge next and holding him in her arms. “Hold still Dodge. We’re done. Everybody’s done. Drew get off the bed please...” she instructed and then winced as she watched Lily catch her balance by stepping heavily onto Kyle’s crotch.

“Arrgghhh...” Kyle groaned and rolled onto his side, his hands moving instinctively down to his bruised manhood.

“Ha!” Ali chuckled while she helped Drew off the bed with one hand. “Drew and Josie go downstairs and wash your hands, please.” They started down the backstairs. “Take your time on the stairs. And don’t touch each other. We’re all done with wrestling and playtime.”

“Oh God” he moaned as Lily moved up to his face and gently patted his cheek.

“Unky” she giggled and patted him again.

“Lily you stay there with Unky Ky and I’ll be right back to help you down the stairs” Ali gave her a serious look before bringing Dodge downstairs.

She was back in a minute to pick up her youngest daughter. Kyle was still moaning on the bed, looking pale.

“I’m sorry you got hurt” she said honestly and quietly. “But you totally deserved that” she winked at him just before she started down the stairs with Lily. “Hope your plans for the evening haven’t been ruined” she giggled.

//

The next day was the last day of The Academy soccer camp for that year. Like the other Thursdays that summer, Ali drove the kids up in the afternoon to play at the beautiful camp. This had been the most advanced group of campers yet, high school varsity teams and a few college teams too, and Ken Krieger had spent the whole week with them. Kristine Lilly, Mia Hamm and Brandi Chastain were also there as the guest coaches that week. Everything had gone well and the young women had learned a lot from all of the coaches. It had been a long eight weeks for the staff and coaches that had worked almost all of them. Sydney and Niki and Cat had all worked the whole camp, relying on Fridays and Saturdays off for a break. It was easier for the soccer coaches to take time off in the evenings too because their obligations were finished once the second soccer training was completed in the afternoon. Technically, they could leave right before dinner if they wanted to. Niki didn’t sleep at the camp every night like Sydney did. But that’s because she didn’t have the kids with her. Niki went home to see Molly and the kids at least two of the five nights of each session. She used Ashlyn’s schedule as a model for her and made it work pretty well. Sydney stayed at the camp all five nights working under the idea that once she had gotten her three kids and all of their crap up there she wasn’t driving back and forth until it was time to go home on Thursday afternoon. Cat stayed up there the whole time as well, with her kids, so she and Sydney were in the same boat.

They had all learned a great deal that first summer and they would meet and make changes and tweak things this winter before coming back again for year #2 in June. In the meantime, the camp itself had been rented by several different groups up until almost Thanksgiving. In future years, they planned to open during the winter as well for anybody that wanted to rent the facility for cross-country skiing and other winter adventures. But this year they were closing two weeks before Thanksgiving and not re-opening until the middle of May when they had some other groups renting again before The Academy took over in mid-June. The more paying customers they could rent to, the more pro-bono and charity groups they could invite in. And that was everybody’s goal.

The end of sessions party was that Thursday afternoon and evening and anybody who had helped in any way with the set-up of the camp had been invited to attend. It was a good turnout with several of the contractors who had donated so much of their time and energy showing up with their families for the cookout and party. Sarah and Erin came up with their baby girl, Daphne, who would turn two years old in October. The Donaldsons came up, except for Justin who was busy getting ready for his first year of college in two weeks. Whitney and Becca were there as were the rest of the four families, except for Ryan who was out of town with his lacrosse team. Most of the guest coaches came back to celebrate and had brought their families to stay for a couple of nights before the next group rental took over Saturday at noon. It was a pretty impressive group of human beings gathered together for a very happy occasion. 

“So, I don’t see Sam here” Sarah said nonchalantly as she quirked an eyebrow at Ali, who was sitting next to her as they watched the kids try to toast marshmallows. Kristie Mewis and her husband were helping Ashlyn and Ken with the Krieger kids. “What ever happened with him?” she nudged the brunette’s shoulder and tried not to chuckle. She knew she was on to something because of the horrified look on Ali’s face.

“Umm, nothing. I guess he couldn’t make it” she shrugged nervously and tried to change the subject. “Daphne’s just beautiful. I can’t believe she’ll be two in a couple of months...”

“Yeah she is, but quit changing the subject. What’s the matter? Are you ok?” Sarah asked, concern evident in her voice, which was low so no-one else could hear their conversation. 

“I’m fine. Nothing’s the matter” Ali smiled awkwardly, trying to sell the cover-up story to her ex.

“Al” Sarah said softly and touched her arm. “I won’t say anything, whatever it is. But if you don’t want to talk about it that’s ok too. I just expected to see him here and I’m shocked that he isn’t.”

They were quiet for a few minutes, enjoying a couple of marshmallows that Drew and Josie brought to them and that had been burnt to a crisp. The Sam story wasn’t a secret, but Ali and Ashlyn had agreed not to tell people about it. If Sam told people that was his business. But they also agreed that they wouldn’t lie to their friends about it either. When they made that agreement Ashlyn had been thinking primarily of Sydney and Kyle and her wife needing to confide in one or both of them. Finally Ali sighed.

“Ok, listen, you can’t say a word” Ali looked around quickly and tried to find the courage to actually spit the words out. “We agreed not to tell people about it unless they came at us like a fucking bloodhound on a scent” she cocked her head and gave the architect a challenging look.

“Hey, I’m sorry” Sarah put her hands up. “You don’t have to tell me Al. I’ll leave it alone.” There was another pause while Ali reconsidered. “But I am going to say I told you so” Sarah said with a smirk.

Ali rolled her eyes and let out a heavy sigh. She spent the next fifteen fairly uninterrupted minutes telling Sarah what had happened with Sam and how she and Ashlyn reacted and the ‘keep your distance’ rules that were in place between the Krieger family and Sam Machado now.

“Holy shit” Sarah breathed out, eyes wide. “I knew he had feelings for you but what the hell was he thinking?”

“I don’t know” Ali closed her eyes, regret washing over her. “I really liked him too, as a friend, as someone to hang out with at all the school stuff who wasn’t a catty bitch always trying to tear down one of the other moms. And I miss him. We were friends Sarah and I still can’t believe how it happened. I mean, how fucking stupid am I?”

“Hey, listen, I wasn’t there, obviously, but from everything you’ve told me, you didn’t do anything wrong. Correct me if I’m wrong, but if you hadn’t gotten sick that night you would have straightened it out with him right then.”

“Yes, totally. I never wanted anything from him other than friendship and I will never understand how he thought I did” Ali lowered her eyes and shook her head sadly.

“I’m going to sound like a man-hating lesbian here, I know you know I’m not, but sometimes guys just don’t think they need to follow cues. They feel like they’re entitled or that you won’t mind if they act on their own desires. Or, maybe he really did think you had similar feelings. But I gotta tell ya, that’s hard to imagine” Sarah frowned and shook her head. “Anybody that’s ever seen the way you look at Ash can tell immediately that you’re not looking at them the same way. I don’t know Al. Maybe he just couldn’t resist and made the only excuse he could think of – that you wanted it too.”

“We haven’t seen them all summer. Sam took Ethan back to Chicago for the summer to visit friends. Drew really misses Ethan a lot. That’s the other part of the equation.”

“But you said Ashlyn hoped Sam would come to this party, right?” Sarah clarified.

“Yeah, she did. She meant it too” Ali replied. “So I’m hopeful we can all get past it and just move forward without having to think about it all the time. That’s another reason we’re not telling anybody.”

“Well, Ash has a good track record of being able to put jealousy and any other bullshit aside” Sarah smiled warmly at the brunette. “I’m living proof.”

“You’re right” Ali agreed and returned the kind smile. She never imagined it would be so helpful to talk to Sarah about this, but she was very grateful. “But you didn’t mess with her wife. In her house with her kids upstairs...”

“Yeah, I get the differences” Sarah nodded. “I’m just saying, from my perspective, it seems like she knows what it’s like to...want you and not be able to have you...” the words stuck in her throat a little bit as she referenced the time at the end of her own relationship with Ali. Not a time the architect looked back on fondly at all. “I don’t know” she looked down, frustrated.

Ali sensed the change and quickly figured out what had caused it. She would feel guilty about that time for as long as she lived but she and Sarah had talked about it before and cleared the air and there was nothing left to say. The brunette wanted to apologize again but she knew that would just piss the architect off. They sat quietly for a few minutes, letting the warm evening air settle around them. Erin came and sat down next to her wife with little Daphne on her knee and that ended the confidential conversation. 

“Thanks for the talk Sarah” Ali put her hand on the architect’s shoulder as she stood up a while later. She had spent a good deal of time talking with Erin and playing with Daphne and the subject of Sam Machado had long been forgotten. “I appreciate it.”

The brunette took a few steps away and stopped to watch the kids, and several adults, making smores with varying degrees of success. She was pleased to see such a good turnout and it had been fun to catch up with some of the builders she used to work with. Ali watched George, her favorite builder and ex-customer, talking with his wife and Ashlyn and Allie Long. Allie was one of the keeper’s best friends from college and had worked as a volunteer coach earlier that summer. Ali had met her several times before and liked her a lot. What she liked best about Allie Long was that she adored Ashlyn and really appreciated her for who and what she was. That would always meant a lot to Ali. But what she didn’t love about Allie Long was that she was always extremely touchy feely with her keeper. The brunette knew there was nothing to it – Allie was straight and very happily married. But no matter how hard she tried to let her brain run the show, her jealous heart always barged in and made itself comfortable. She could see Allie’s hand dangerously close to Ashlyn’s breast as she leaned over her to talk with George’s wife about something. Allie always had at least one hand on the keeper, no matter what and it irked Ali if she let it. Ashlyn, for her part, didn’t seem to notice it. And if she did notice it she wasn’t bothered by it at all. No, Ali knew this was all on her and her jealousy. Even after 9-1/2 years together the brunette still had trouble controlling the green-eyed monster when it came to her gorgeous wife. Part of her knew it was a problem, but part of her was glad that she still cared enough to get jealous in the first place. She had heard stories from friends and read stories about how married couples simply lose that fire that once blazed between them. It was usually replaced by something else – a deeper appreciation or something like that, but that fire never burned quite as bright after so many years. 

Before she even knew what she was doing, Ali walked up to the foursome and hugged her wife from behind, sliding her arms around Ashlyn’s waist and giving her a tight, possessive squeeze. Sarah’s words rang in her ears... ‘Anybody that’s ever seen the way you look at Ash can tell immediately that you’re not looking at them the same way’. The brunette knew the architect was right, and had spoken from painful experience. She couldn’t imagine a time when she didn’t look at Ashlyn like she wanted to devour her or like she wanted to worship at her feet. Those were the two looks that came right from the depths of her heart and soul. Sarah was right and Sam was an idiot or an asshole or both. Ali sighed, leaned her cheek against Ashlyn’s shoulder blade, and wished Allie Long would stop touching her wife.


	33. Four-Family Fun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm getting close to finished writing Part 6. I think there'll be 44 chapters or so. Here's a second chapter for tonight just because.  
> Thanks for sticking with me friends. :)

Two days after the party at the end of The Academy, the four families drove North for their annual summer vacation week. The summer had been so hectic, especially with everybody’s involvement in The Academy, that the families had talked about cancelling their vacation and just relaxing at home. They would lose the deposit on the big house on Squam lake – Molly had reserved the same house from two summers ago when the twins were only three months old, but that wasn’t the end of the world for any of them. Whitney and Ryan had not fully committed to the vacation yet anyway. Becca was only six months old and they were worried about disrupting everybody else in the house, just as Ashlyn and Ali had been worried two years ago and just as Sydney and Dom had worried last year when Maddox was only five months old. Finally, at the party at The Academy, they had made time to huddle up while Dom and Ali kept an eye on the kids playing by the recreation deck.

“Alright, here’s the deal” Molly began, matter-of-factly as they all literally stood in a small circle to make sure they stayed focused on the discussion at hand. Her face was serious and she took turns looking at each pair of eyes as she spoke. “Whitney – you are not using that baby as an excuse. We’ve got the same house as last time and you and Ryan can have the basement, just like Ash and Ali did with the twins. We’ve all taken babies even younger than Becca so don’t even start” she raised her eyebrows at the lawyer before moving on. “We’re going” she motioned her hand between herself and her wife across the huddle. “Nik says it’ll be more fun to relax up there than it would be at home so I’m gonna trust her on that one. Syd” Molly looked directly at her and shrugged, “I get that you’ve been away from home more than at home this summer so you’re the only one who gets a pass, in my book anyway. You might not feel the same way Nik does...”

“And that’s ok” Niki added, encouragingly. “I almost said no too, but then I thought about how awesome our week always is and it was easy for me to see how much I didn’t want to miss that. But that’s just me.”

“Thanks guys” Sydney replied thoughtfully. “I’ve been struggling with this for a while now, I won’t lie. But I’m with Nik, when I think about missing it I get excited for two minutes and then sad for about two hours. Besides, Dom’s sure this is the year he’ll stay up on the wake board longer than Ash...” she giggled.

“Hey! Never gonna happen. Not in this lifetime” the keeper shot back with a chuckle.

“So you’re in Syd?” Molly clarified, trying to keep things on track.

“Yeah” Sydney nodded and grinned. “The Dwyers are in.”

“Awesome!” Molly pumped her fist as her eyes sparkled. “So that’s it...”

“Doesn’t anybody care if we come or not?” Ashlyn pretended her feelings were hurt.

“Why on earth would you not?” Whitney frowned in confusion.

“I don’t know” Ashlyn shrugged, “maybe I just wanted to be asked” she stuck her chin out and frowned like a brat.

“Wow, and somehow Ali’s the one with ‘princess’ as her nickname?” Niki chuckled. “Got that one wrong didn’t we?” they all laughed at the keeper.

“Watch it...” Ashlyn started to protest, playfully.

“Ok, ok” Molly reined everybody in again, “that’s enough from you two in the peanut gallery” she gave her wife a menacing look that only lasted a split second before turning into a grin. “So we’re good then. This is it. No more talk about cancelling. We’re all in. Right?”

A chorus of affirmative replies sounded as they broke their huddle. Everyone was excited about going back to the lake this summer after changing up their vacation last year to go to the Olympics in LA. Not that they hadn’t enjoyed their time at the beach on the West Coast, but their time up on the lake was different. There were more water activities you could do and alter for the different ages of the kids. And, after doing it the first two years, it just felt right to be going back to the lake again. It didn’t have to be Squam Lake. Molly had almost gotten a big house on a lake up in Maine which they would have enjoyed just as much. Something about the stillness and tranquility of a lake appealed to all of them. Maybe it was because they spent a lot of time at the beach in Gloucester so the lake was more of a novelty. Who knew? They didn’t really care either. They just identified the feeling they were all having and were relieved it was a pretty mutual thing.

The only person missing from their vacation week that August was Meg. By the time she got back home to DC and settled in again, it just seemed like a lot to ask of Hannah to send her back up to New England again after only two weeks at home. Meg was truly conflicted because she really wanted to go on vacation with the Kriegers. But, for the first time ever in her young life, she could tell that her mom would be hurt if she did. 

“Well, it’s really your decision Meggie” Ashlyn spoke carefully into the phone her first week back from Germany. The 13-year old had just confessed that she felt guilty leaving again. Ashlyn had pressed her to figure out why she felt guilty, hoping she could work it out herself because that was always so much more impactful when you were growing and maturing and learning how to be an adult. “But I have to tell you I’m very proud of you for thinking about your mom’s feelings like this. That’s a big deal and you’re showing me you’re growing up. Good job sweetie.”

“So I can still come though, right?” she asked, testing the boundaries again.

“Yes” Ashlyn replied slowly. “You are always welcome to come with us, you know that...” she stretched out her words to give the girl enough time to make the right decision.

“But I should probably stay here with mom, huh?” she asked bluntly.

“Well if you put yourself in her position...”

“Yeah, I know” Meg cut her off and sighed. “How would I feel if my daughter left for 6 weeks and then wanted to leave again just two weeks later” she sighed even louder. “Mom said I could go though.”

“Meg, listen now because this is important” Ashlyn’s voice got softer and more serious. “Your mom said that because she loves you and she knows you would have fun at the lake with us. That’s, like, the ultimate form of love right there.”

“What do you mean?”

“Your mom knows that she’ll be hurt if you go and she’ll miss you like crazy but she’s willing to suffer through that pain and misery for you. Just so you can have some fun.” The keeper kept her voice steady and calm but spoke slowly so the teenager could take in all of her words. “Do you understand that?”

“Kind of, I guess” Meg sighed again.

They were quiet as Ashlyn tried to think of a different way to explain a very hard concept.

“Ok, do you remember at one of our Thursday cookouts when all the kids came up to camp, at the end of session, you gave Lily your toasted marshmallow?”

“Ummm...oh yeah. Oh that one was perfect. It was my best one.”

“That’s right. I remember watching you and thinking how cute both you and Lily were and how proud I was of you for being so selfless and sharing that marshmallow with her. I mean, you worked hard on that and it meant a lot to you. And you looked at me after you gave it to her and you looked really sad” Ashlyn kept going, hoping this example might ring true to her step-daughter. “Do you remember all of that?”

“Yeah, I do. But what...”

“I’m getting there” Ashlyn chuckled. “Just give me another second. You didn’t have to give that marshmallow away to her but you did because you love her and you knew she really wanted it and you knew she would really enjoy eating it.”

“Yeah, it was perfect...”

“That’s kind of the same thing your mom is doing for you now with this vacation. She’s you and you’re Lily in our marshmallow story. She really doesn’t want you to go because she’s missed you all summer long and you’ve been away from home longer than you ever have before. But she loves you and she knows you want to go. Now, imagine how you would have felt if you offered your perfect marshmallow to Lily and she changed her mind and said that you could keep it and eat it yourself. What would that have felt like?”

“That would have been great!”

“Exactly. Well, that’s how you’ll make your mom feel if you don’t go on this vacation. It’ll be like you’re giving her the marshmallow back so she can eat it herself.”

“But I’m the marshmallow...right?” she was trying hard to understand.

“That’s right honey. You’re the marshmallow.”

They ended the conversation with Ashlyn making sure Meg knew she could absolutely still choose to go on vacation with them. She just wanted her to understand things from her mom’s point of view before she made that decision. Ashlyn, with all her empathy, really wanted Meg to stay in DC and not break her mother’s heart. Even though the keeper, selfishly, would miss the girl during their week at the lake.

“It’ll be interesting to see what she chooses” Ali commented when her wife told her about the conversation later that night. “Do you really think she’s mature enough to even think about that?”

“I’m not sure” Ashlyn shrugged as she finished taking her contacts out at the sink. “I just figured that it was worth it to try. There aren’t always a lot of opportunities to make someone so happy. Meg’s got a great one in front of her right now. She’s 13 and I won’t judge her if she decides to come with us. But I wanted to try and give her a chance to make Hannah happy.”

The teenager surprised everyone by choosing to stay in DC with her mom. Ashlyn told her how proud she was of her and almost cried when she told Ali about the decision. Kindness meant more to Ashlyn than almost anything else. And to see young Meg show such kindness for her own mother moved the keeper more than she thought it would. They all missed Meg during vacation too. The grown-ups realized how much the older girl had helped keep the little kids under control without them even realizing it. Granted, the kids were getting older and were bound to get into more trouble naturally, but there were several occasions where all the parents knew that whatever situation it was they were dealing with wouldn’t have happened if Meg had been with them. Maybe the kids didn’t try as many things when she was around. Maybe she nipped things in the bud before they got out of control. But that summer the two oldest boys, Noah Cross who was 9-1/2, and Cash Dwyer who was almost 8, clashed with the younger boys almost every single day. Drew Krieger was 6 and Evan Cross was 5 and they tried desperately to do everything the bigger boys did. Noah and Cash took full advantage and taunted the younger boys with their longer legs and stronger arms. 

On Thursday their luck ran out. After five days of being told by all of the adults to stop tormenting the younger boys, Noah and Cash goaded Drew and Evan into climbing into a short tower of two stacked inner tubes. They were out in the yard between the house and the lake and it was almost dinner time so most of the grown-ups were distracted and busy in the kitchen with the youngest kids. As soon as Drew and Evan climbed into the hollow center of the first inner tube, Noah and Cash placed the second one on top of the first. Each tube was about 18 inches high and 4 feet in diameter and pretty heavy. They weren’t the kind of tubes that got dragged behind the boats on the lake, they were the enormous donut shaped tubes that you could float on instead. They were actual inner tubes from the big tractors that were used by some local farmers. They were big and heavy and black. The younger boys thought it was kind of cool inside the tube tower for the first few minutes. Both younger boys were a little shorter than 4 feet tall and the tube tower was about 3 feet tall so their heads were sticking above the top tube. But then they realized they couldn’t get out because they weren’t strong enough to move the top tube. To make matters worse, Noah and Cash started to run full speed and jump into the sides of the tube tower, knocking the younger boys around inside. They hit them from different sides so the tower stayed upright while Drew and Evan banged around each other inside.

“Cassius, that’s enough now” Dom called out from the deck. “Let them out.”

“They’re having fun though” Noah laughed and Cash quickly agreed.

“Does it sound like they’re having fun?” Dom challenged and gave his son a stern look. “That’s enough. Let them out.”

They didn’t let them out, but they did stop hurtling themselves at the tube tower so Drew and Evan weren’t crashing into each other anymore. Niki and Ashlyn were securing the pontoon boat down at the end of the dock, cleaning out anything that had been left on it from the day’s adventures, and were dimly aware of the tube play on the grass, but it seemed to have calmed down. Noah dared the younger boys to climb to the top of the tube tower and help each other over the top if they wanted out. After several tries with varying degrees of teamwork, Drew managed to get to the top, sitting there proudly. In another few minutes Cash joined him up there, climbing up from the outside of the tower. Evan was ready to get out and yelled loudly at his brother Noah to let him out.

“Noah!” Niki yelled to her oldest son. “Let your brother out of there, right now.”

“Hi Mama!” Drew called to his mother when he looked up in response to Niki’s voice. He waved both arms over his head at Ashlyn down on the dock. Cash did the same thing as both boys gripped the tube by squeezing their knees together and trying to keep their balance.

“Hey big D!” Ashlyn grinned and waved back. “Hi Cash!”

In the next instant, Noah pushed against the tube tower to help his little brother get out. The 9-1/2 year old clearly hadn’t thought the action through. He was just obeying his mother who had told him to let his brother out. Before Ashlyn could even say anything, Noah leaned hard against the top tube with both hands and all his strength. But the tube didn’t slide because Drew and Cash were sitting on top of it. Instead, Noah’s force pushed up the tube, tipping it vertically and causing both Drew and Cash to go flying off.

“Drew!” Ashlyn choked out as she sprinted up the dock, leaving a confused Niki, who had turned her attention back to the boat, behind.

Dom had also seen the spill, right at the very end as he brought out the food to go onto the grill up on the deck. He put the tray down and hopped over the railing of the deck, landing in the grass almost 10 feet below like a panther. He was spurred on by the sounds of his son’s screams.

“Cassius!” he yelled and moved towards the boy who was sprawled on the grass, face down.

Noah and Evan both looked horrified as they stood still, watching Drew and Cash try to sit up as they cried loudly. Drew was crying but Cash was screaming, clearly in severe pain. Ashlyn and Dom got to them at the same time, glancing quickly at each other as they knelt down in the grass. Ali and Sydney appeared on the deck, their faces filled with concern as they had heard their spouses yell out the name of one of their children. Everyone could tell that Cash was hurt and it didn’t take long to figure out why. Ashlyn winced as she held Drew against her chest and saw Dom lift his son’s right arm for a better look. It was clearly broken, or at least severely sprained. He must have tried to break his fall with it.

“What can I do?” Ashlyn asked the trainer, her voice loud so he could hear her over the boys’ cries.

“It’s definitely broken” he met her worried eyes. “Time for a trip to the emergency room” he stood up with Cash in his arms, still crying loudly.

“What happened?” Sydney asked as she ran to Dom’s side, Ali right behind her. 

“They fell off the top tube” Ashlyn answered, meeting her wife’s eyes with a nod. “He’s ok Al, just scared I think.”

It was late that night when Sydney and Dom, carrying a sleeping Cash in his arms, got back to the lake house. All of the grown-ups were still awake when the two tired and stressed parents came down to the kitchen hoping to eat the dinner they had missed hours ago. Whitney was breastfeeding Becca but all of the other kids were in bed, asleep. Ashlyn and Niki had been vigilant all night, making frequent trips to make sure that everybody was where they were supposed to be and that there were no more shenanigans that might end in injury. They both felt horribly guilty that they hadn’t been able to stop the accident. 

“Guys, I was right there too” Dom shrugged his shoulders as Ali put the plates they had saved from dinner down in front of him and his wife. “It’s not any more your fault than it is mine.”

Sydney shot a hard look at her husband and took a drink of wine that Molly had just poured her. Ali sat next to her bestie and put her hand on her thigh under the table, sensing the anger or maybe it was just anxiety from the evening’s activities. She squeezed Sydney’s thigh, trying to soothe her.

“So it’s good it was a clean break, right? No surgery or anything, just the hard cast for...” Ryan tried to change the subject a little and focus on the good news.

“6-8 weeks” Dom answered as he started to eat. “Thank you guys for this” he pointed at his plate and gave them a tired smile.

“And thank you for taking care of the boys tonight” Sydney added, the anxiety evident in her voice. “Were they ok?”

“They were fine” Molly smiled warmly at the frazzled mom. “They missed you and were a little confused because you left so abruptly, but we explained it and they seemed to understand that you weren’t leaving them for good” she chuckled. 

“James wants you to check in on him” Ali patted Sydney’s thigh. “I promised him you would before you went to bed.” Sydney looked like she was going to cry and she reached down and held Ali’s hand while she took a couple of deep breaths. “Are you ok boo?” the brunette asked softly.

“Yeah, it was just...a lot” she let out a big breath and closed her eyes for a second. 

“How’s Drew?” Dom asked, looking at Ashlyn. He knew Ali and his wife were having a moment and wanted to let them have it. “Just the bump on the head? It didn’t get any bigger did it?”

“He’s ok” the keeper nodded. “He’s got a good knot on the side of his head but he was ok. We watched him closely for the rest of the night and kept him still, just in case. But he seems fine.”

“So I’m sure you guys have all talked about it already” Sydney looked at the faces of her friends sitting with her around the big kitchen table. “But what happened? Dom only saw the very end of it, when the boys were almost on the ground already.”

Niki cleared her throat, her face serious when she finally lifted her eyes. She had been quiet the whole time since apologizing again as soon as the Dwyers had returned to the house.

“Noah pushed the top tube up so Evan could get out” she swallowed hard, glanced down again and then continued. “I told him to let him out but I didn’t bother to look up and see what might happen...”

“Nik, come on” Ashlyn put her hand on her friend’s shoulder from the seat next to her. “It wasn’t your fault. It was an accident. Noah wasn’t trying to hurt anybody. I saw the whole fucking thing but I couldn’t get the words out before it was too late” she shook her head and sighed. “They were just playing.”

“I know we don’t really have one in the running yet” Whitney began slowly, her voice careful. “But we’ve been doing this for a while now, all of us” she looked around the table. “Our kids are going to hurt each other and themselves and their siblings. There’s just no way around it” she shrugged. “We’re raising them together and they spend a lot of time together and I think that’s the coolest thing in the world” she smiled. “But that means things like today are going to happen. I think we all know this, but, they’re all good kids. There’s not a mean one in the bunch...”

“To be fair, it’s a little early to say one way or the other about Becca” Molly joked and everybody laughed.

“True” Whitney grinned as she looked down at her nursing baby girl. “All I’m trying to say, and it’s late and I’m probably not making any sense at all, is that we’re all going to be you guys at some point” she looked at the Dwyers. “It’s going to suck for all of us, but that’s just how it is with kids, right?”

“Honestly, I can’t believe it hasn’t happened before now” Ali chuckled. “And I’ve gotta tell you all right now, I’m sorry for whatever future damage Dodge does to any of the little people you love. Honey” she looked at Ashlyn, “we’d better start a special savings account to pay for the pain and suffering he’s going to cause.”

They all laughed and were quiet for a few minutes before Dom spoke again.

“Truthfully, it’s my fault. I told Cassius to let the younger boys out and then didn’t follow through. In fact, I told him twice” he offered.

“But Noah talked you out of it, I heard him” Niki said with a guilty look. “And I didn’t do anything about it either.”

“We were all busy doing something you guys, you just happened to be the closest” Molly finally weighed in. She and Niki felt terribly guilty that their son had caused the accident. “But Whitney’s absolutely right. I feel guilty as hell that Noah pushed that tube and made Cash and Drew fall. I’m sick to my stomach about it. But next time it’ll be someone else’s kid who makes the mistake. I hope anyway” she chuckled nervously and kept going. “Us gnashing our teeth about it isn’t going to do any good. It’s not going to make Cash’s arm feel better or Drew’s head hurt less...”

“Molly’s right” Ashlyn nodded after thinking quietly for a little while. “I trust you guys with my life, and with my kids’ lives. Accidents happen. Kids get hurt. There’s no way around it. As my wife often reminds me, ‘shit happens’.” They all laughed with the blonde. 

“Maybe tomorrow we sit everybody down and talk about listening skills. The accident wouldn’t have happened if Noah and Cash had listened to Dom in the first place. What do you think?” Sydney asked, moving from face to face around the table.

“Good plan” Ali agreed. “And then we’ll move on.”

“And wait for the next trip to the ER” Sydney teased with a wink.

There were 12 kids among the four families, including Meg, and there had already been a good number of injuries that hadn’t been serious enough for a trip to the ER. The victims were spread out evenly from family to family, as were the instigators. It would be a life-long struggle for the tight-knit group of friends, but they would always find a way to work through it together. They were as close as family and they all cherished that and were willing to deal with whatever trouble the kids found themselves in. That’s just what family did.

Saturday morning when they were packing up to leave, Ashlyn made a point of teasing Dom about the Dwyers’ new minivan.

“It wasn’t so long ago you were busting my ass about minivans, was it smart guy?” she grinned as they each put load after load of kid stuff into their own vehicle.

“Ugh, don’t remind me” he rolled his eyes. “There is absolutely no way to look cool in a minivan. All hope is lost” he laughed. 

But their lives were so different now that neither Dom nor Ashlyn really cared much about being cool anymore. They had their moments of longing when they saw some of the social media posts of their younger and single friends. But who didn’t? It was normal. But no matter how challenging the day had been, or how silly they felt driving around in a minivan, the tiny hugs and kisses and ‘I love yous’ that they got from their beautiful children more than made it ok. There was nothing better than having one of your kids hug you hard, for no reason. And those moments made everything else worth it.

Earlier in the week, Ryan and Dom had gone into town after the kids were all in bed. It was Ryan and Whitney’s date night but they had refused. Whitney wasn’t ready and nobody felt like pressuring her into anything. Sydney had been the one who suggested the boys go out for a while and the idea quickly turned into reality. Dom had confessed to her once that he sometimes felt overwhelmed by all the moms in the house. Not in a bad way, just in the way that a big group of moms could be. Sydney knew what he meant and didn’t take offense. Men were different than women in a lot of ways and she imagined herself being there with six guys and just one other woman and shuddered. That’s how the six women came to be sitting around the kitchen table with some wine and cheese and chocolate and marshmallows. They chatted and laughed, trying to keep their voices down so they didn’t wake any of the kids up. They were playing Uno, each woman holding far more cards in their hands than they wanted. Whitney had been pretty quiet the whole time and when Ali came downstairs after checking on the kids she noticed how pensive she looked.

“You alright Whit? You look a little...thoughtful” the brunette cocked her head at her friend as everybody else turned their attention to the lawyer as well.

“Oh, um...yeah, I’m good” Whitney blushed a little and felt shy, even in front of her closest friends.

She didn’t say anything else so the other women went back to playing their card game. It was about ten more minutes before Whitney spoke up.

“I...I guess I just wanted to say thank you. To all of you” she spoke quickly, her nerves getting the best of her. “All of this time I’ve been the one without kids and it was...hard sometimes” she paused and glanced up to see all ten eyes on her. The good news was that along with the eyes, there were five faces full of kindness and friendship and love staring at her too. “I mean, I love being Aunt Whit, don’t get me wrong” she chuckled a little less nervously. “But knowing I wanted kids and then waiting so long to have them was really hard.” Sydney, sitting next to the lawyer, reached over and squeezed her hand with a warm smile. “No, I don’t mean this as a pity party for me” she rolled her eyes and let out a frustrated sigh. “I’m trying to say thank you for showing me how to be a mom. All of you. The best fucking moms in the world right here” she grinned as she looked around the table. “I was finally able to see the good part about waiting so long to have kids...”

“You can stay awake past 9pm...”  
“You can still wear a bikini without worrying about stretchmarks...”  
“More time to get all the crazy sex out of the way...”  
“All the extra practice with our kids...”  
“Romantic getaway weekends whenever you want...”

Everybody chimed in with a quip, making them all laugh out loud.

“No, no” Whitney laughed and shook her head. “But yes, those are all good things about waiting...you’re not wrong.” She paused for a few seconds and everybody settled down again. “The best part about waiting so long to have kids is you guys helping me every single step of the way. I can’t tell you how much that’s meant to me over the past year and a half. Really” she started to get choked up as her emotions rose up, “it’s meant everything to me and I just can’t thank you enough. There’s no way to repay you...”

“Repay us?” Sydney contorted her face and shook her head. “Girl, have you lost your mind?” she quirked an eyebrow at the lawyer and squeezed her hand again. “You’ve been there for all of us, more times than we can even count. You’ve helped us take our kids to get their pictures taken with Santa for the past four years for Christ’s sake.” Everybody was nodding and agreeing with the coach. “The very least we can do is give you a heads up about what’s gonna happen next. Seriously, that’s like the bare minimum we could ever do” she chuckled.

“I’m sorry you had to wait so long Whit” Ali added sincerely. “But look at the beautiful baby you have now...” she nodded towards the living room where baby Becca was sleeping.

“Yeah” Ashlyn interrupted her wife, “if you hadn’t waited maybe you would have had one of those ugly babies instead” she giggled and grinned, her dimple popping out as she teased her best friend. “Have you guys seen that Instagram account with all the ugly babies? It’s soooo funny” she chuckled and became aware that she was the only one laughing.

“Are you done now?” Ali quirked her eyebrow at the keeper.

“Aw, it’s just a joke” Ashlyn quickly looked at Whitney and was relieved to see her grinning too. “See, Whit knows I’m only kidding. Geez you guys, lighten up.”

“We love you Whit and you’re doing fucking awesome” Niki jumped in. “In case we haven’t told you that lately. You and Ryan are both doing a great job with her. Nothing changes your life more than having a baby and you guys are handling it like pros.”

“Well, that’s what I’m trying to thank you for” the lawyer giggled. “I still feel like an idiot most of the time and I’ve never been more exhausted in my entire life – and that includes Anson’s double sessions in college” she looked seriously at Ashlyn who groaned. “But the only reason I’m not losing my damned mind is because of you guys. So thank you. Very much.”


	34. Loose Lips

“You did what?!!” Sydney’s voice echoed loudly across Squam lake.

Ali was sure every property on the other side of the almost 7-acre lake had heard her best friend’s exclamation. They were taking advantage of some rare downtime while Maddox, Dodge and Lily took their afternoon naps in the rented vacation house. Whitney was inside with baby Becca but would soon be re-joining them out by the edge of the lake. They were sunbathing and enjoying some sangria that Molly had made before everybody else went out on the pontoon boat and motor boat for the afternoon. Penny Cross was almost 3-1/2 years old and probably should have stayed home for her nap, but that’s why Molly had gone with the group. She would make sure the little girl had some quiet time to rest. James Dwyer was a few months older than Penny and had stopped napping at the beginning of the month. Like all 3-year olds who are just getting used to staying awake all day, it was a struggle to know exactly when they needed a little downtime and when they needed an actual 45-minute nap. The consequences of making the wrong decision were severe for everyone involved. 

“Keep it down!” Ali chastised and hushed at the same time, smacking the coach’s arm for good measure. “Are you trying to wake the dead?” she sat up in the lounge chair and turned her head to look back at the house. “I’ll kill you if you wake those kids up” the brunette giggled.

“I’m sorry!” Sydney whisper-yelled and slapped her best friend’s thigh with the back of her hand. “But Jesus fucking Christ Kriegs, give a girl a warning or something. For fuck’s sake!”

Sydney’s eyes were like saucers and she stared at her bestie with a face that was half disbelieving shock and half approving smirk. She reached down for her glass of sangria and took a big swig, never taking her eyes off of Ali who had finally turned around in her chair again.

“Well, what kind of warning did you want? You never give me any warnings” the brunette giggled again and reached for her own glass between their chairs.

“Oh, I don’t know, maybe oh, anything before ‘So Ash and I had sex at a dance club in Germany’ would have been helpful” Sydney rolled her eyes dramatically before looking behind them again towards the house.

When she returned her gaze to Ali, the brunette looked like the cat that ate the canary. Her cheeks were pink and her eyes looked like they were going to dance right out of her face they were so full of excitement and mischief.

“Fine, she finally told me about her wild times in Dusseldorf with Niki...” she began after another drink, “and we had sex at a dance club that night” she confessed with a huge smile. “Is that better?”

“I don’t even know who you are” Sydney teased, shaking her head slowly from side to side as she took in the shit-eating grin on her best friend’s face. “But you’d better hurry up and tell me this story before Whit comes back out here.”

It was only Ashlyn and Ali’s third week back from Germany but it had felt like three months as Ali tried to keep their public sexcapade their secret. They had long ago come to the understanding that keeping a secret meant not telling anyone but Whitney or Sydney. Sometimes Ali told Kyle too and occasionally Ashlyn shared with Niki. But they were both careful about their privacy and were smart enough to know which secrets could be shared and which ones couldn’t. If there was any doubt, then one or the other of them would just say ‘don’t tell anybody, not even Syd’ and there was no confusion. Ashlyn had even asked her wife one night last week if she had told Sydney about it yet and was surprised to hear her reply that she hadn’t. 

The brunette breathlessly recounted the night at the club, starting with the dance floor and ending with the orgasms in the basement changing area beneath the stairs. She giggled and blushed as the coach asked questions and refilled both of their glasses from the thermos.

“Well here’s to living your best, public-fucking life!” Sydney toasted. “I’m so shocked I don’t even know what to say” she chuckled after taking a drink. “But I think I’m even more proud of you” she reached out and put her hand on Ali’s arm. “When I think back to how...”

“Frigid?” Ali offered a word to fill the pause with a shy giggle.

“No, God no” the coach scrunched her face up and frowned. “Reserved...I like reserved. You didn’t have a ton of experience but you’ve never been a prude or anything. I just think it took the right person to help you learn to...explore a little bit more” Sydney beamed proudly at the brunette and squeezed her arm. “I’m just so fucking proud of you Alibaba” her voice was full of emotion. 

Truthfully, Sydney had always been afraid that Emily had somehow broken sex for Ali too, along with so many other things that had to do with relationships and love. There was nothing wrong with safe, kind of boring sex, if that’s what both people wanted. Sydney would never judge anybody’s sex life because she couldn’t stand it when people judged hers. But she knew Ali better than anybody else, even better than Kyle sometimes. It wasn’t Kyle who was sneaking Sandi Leroux’s Playgirl magazines into her bedroom so they could pore over every page like the curious, hormonal 11-year olds they were. Although he probably wished he had been.

Sydney and Ali would look at the naked pictures of men in those magazines and wonder how everything worked and what a penis felt like and tasted like and would make them feel like. Kyle and Ali had always been close too, but they stopped bathing together when they were five or six and had been more modest with each other when it came to nudity ever since. Sydney, as always, was a step ahead of the brunette in terms of development. She started puberty and got her period a year before Ali got hers. They had always shared every part of their changing bodies with each other though. As curious girls they had looked at each other’s vulvas in amazement, having no real idea what they were seeing. They cautiously touched each other’s breasts and tried to imagine what the big deal could possibly be, awkwardly poking each other and giggling. The only conclusion they ever came up with was that Sydney’s boobs were always bigger than Ali’s. They explored together, sneaking looks at the medical books in the library or the National Geographic magazines at Ali’s house for clues to the mystery of sex and the body parts that participated in it. 

The coach didn’t have any penises in her life. She didn’t barge unexpectedly into the bathroom and catch her father just getting into or out of the shower. She didn’t have a brother to share bathtime with even as innocent young children who were just learning what the different body parts looked like on actual human beings. The dirty magazines helped fill in some blanks for Sydney, but it really wasn’t surprising when she called Ali one evening to tell her that she had conducted her own little show and tell at the movies with a boy from school. They all had questions and wanted answers. Ali completely understood why it was so important to start talking with kids about sex and their bodies when they were very young. When she and Sydney were kids it wasn’t a thing that parents did. There weren’t books about it, geared for different age groups along the way. They got ‘the talk’ when they first got their period and that was it. It was a big reason why she swallowed her embarrassment and tried to answer any questions any of the kids ever asked her about sex or their bodies or her body, starting with Meg catching she and Ashlyn on the couch a few years back. If she and Ashlyn didn’t want their kids looking for answers in other places and with other people, then they needed to provide them with the means to find the answers in their own home.

Ali got almost all of her information about sex from Sydney when they were kids. Kyle was too confused about his own sexuality and even though she didn’t understand his struggle at the time, Ali knew enough not to bother him with that particular topic. Thankfully, Sandi Leroux’s openness and frankness carried over to sex and didn’t just stop at menstruation. Sandi would joke, even now, about how fearless her daughter had been with her questions. She admitted to being nervous about answering them at the time but Sydney told her that she had never even suspected that her mother had been anxious about any of it. All those times when they were growing up and watching movies and tv shows together and reading the same books, Ali and Sydney shared their curiosity as most best friends did. Sydney had seen the look Ali would get on her face when she was turned on by a picture they were looking at or a sex scene they were watching on tv. The R-rated movies they would rent at Blockbuster, Sydney was very persuasive, even as a freshman in high school, captivated them as they watched them at Sydney’s house where they had more privacy than most kids those days. They watched the remake of ‘Lolita’ and all sorts of foreign films that promised risqué sex scenes. They squirmed through the BDSM themed ‘Secretary’ and suffered through ‘Eyes Wide Shut’ just for the infamous orgy scenes. Sydney knew her bestie was interested in exploring sex and had encouraged her to do so as best she could. She knew that Ali wasn’t going to go around playing ‘I’ll show you mine if you show me yours’ with the neighborhood boys like she herself did. Their personalities were just too different. Ali was curious as hell, but she was still Ali, still reserved and private about her body and what it did. 

Emily had caused so much damage, more than Sydney could have imagined at first, that the coach honestly wondered if she had ruined sex for her best friend too. She knew Emily barely touched Ali in public and was afraid that she wasn’t much better about it in private. And Ali was unusually tight-lipped about her sex-life with Emily. The brunette had always told Sydney about her boyfriends and things they did or didn’t do, just as the coach had always shared her exploits and discoveries with Ali. The year in Germany was the only time the brunette held back some of the details, finding it easier to resist her best friend over the phone instead of in person. Ali’s attitude about sex, as a young woman anyway, had been much the same as her attitude about food. She would try almost anything once, unless it was really gross. And she had to trust you if she was going to rely on your food, or sex, recommendation. 

“I still can’t believe we did that” Ali whispered conspiratorially but then broke into the biggest grin yet. “I just...I don’t know how to explain it” she shrugged as she blushed again. “I couldn’t believe the words came out of my mouth in the first place, back in the hotel.”

“I would have paid money to see Ashlyn’s face when you said that” Sydney cackled and slapped her own thigh. “Oh my God...big, huge amounts of money.”

“I definitely surprised her” Ali giggled again. “Which I don’t get to do too often, especially when it comes to the bedroom.”

“Or the club!”

“All I can think about now...”

“Is how good it was?” Sydney cut her off and wagged her eyebrows. “What is it about the fear of being caught that makes it so much hotter?”

“No, the cameras” Ali finished her thought. “I hope there weren’t cameras down there, you know, like security cameras or something. Wait, have you and Dom done it in public? Besides the swimming pool kink you guys have...”

“Only in bathrooms a few times” the coach pursed her lips as she considered the question. “Oh, and when he used to work at the hospital there was this utility closet that was surprisingly roomy...”

“Of course” Ali laughed out loud. “So was this a regular thing?”

“No, public sex is nerve-wracking and I don’t like to rush things if I don’t have to” Sydney answered and tossed her hair over her shoulder with a dramatic flourish and a giggle. “Only twice at the hospital and that was only after long separations where he was working these crazy shifts...”

“I remember those” Ali nodded. “Four days in a row with barely time to get home...”

“So he didn’t bother. He just crashed in the lounge when he could. Damn, I do not miss that.” Sydney looked out over the lake and had another drink before continuing. “The key is you have to be able to trust them. Trust that they’re just as scared as you are, just as turned on as you are, just as invested as you are. And you have to trust them to cover for you or help you if it all goes to hell. That was it for me. I know Dom would do everything in his power to protect me from anybody else’s eyes, from whatever trouble came from it, from anybody getting smart-mouthed about it. I know he’s got my back, no matter what. That’s the only way fucking in public ever works...”

“That’s so true. I mean, can you imagine me even considering it before now? It’s taken 8 years of marriage and almost 10 years of being together for me to get there with Ash” the brunette shook her head in wonder as she spoke.

“Why do I feel like I don’t want to know what’s going on out here” Whitney’s voice surprised them from a few feet behind their chairs.

Both women jumped and Ali spilled her glass of sangria down the front of her bathing suit and squealed at the shocking cold sensation as Sydney cackled again.

“Oh Whit, we’re just talking about Ali’s sex life” the coach answered through more laughter as she watched the brunette get out of her chair and jump into the lake.

“So much warmer” Ali dunked herself down in the lake water that was definitely warmer than the iced beverage had been.

“Hearing those two having sex is definitely something I do not miss” Whitney teased as she sat in her own chair on the other side of Ali’s. “Don’t get me wrong, I miss a lot of things about living with you guys, but that is absolutely not one of them.”

They all laughed, even the brunette, with her blushing cheeks, standing waist deep in the lake.

“Do you remember at my bachelorette weekend when they came back from shopping and went upstairs to ‘get ready’?” Sydney used air quotes and laughed with Whitney who was nodding her head vigorously.

“Oh yeah” the lawyer chuckled.

“They thought they were being so quiet and we could all hear them getting busy” Sydney laughed some more, enjoying the way Ali was blushing and getting flustered.

“Pro tip” Whitney joked in as serious a voice as she could muster, “if you don’t want the people downstairs to know you’re having sex, maybe don’t fuck on the actual floor.”

Sydney howled with laughter and Ali tried, unsuccessfully, to splash them both from the lake, ten feet away.

“Now that is some good fucking advice” the coach nodded and pointed at Whitney.

“Pun completely intended?” the lawyer quirked her eyebrow at Sydney.

“You know it!”

“Alright, alright” the brunette started to walk towards them, blush still coloring her cheeks. “You’re just lucky we came downstairs at all that night” she quirked her own eyebrow.

“Oh!” Sydney grinned broadly, “you came downstairs too? We must have missed that one” she winked at Whitney. “We were all too busy celebrating my bachelorette party, you know, nothing important” she shrugged dismissively as her best friend reached for her towel and started to dry herself off.

“Funny though, you’d have thought we’d have heard them downstairs too...” Whitney started to tease but Ali cut her off.

“Oh fuck you both” she shook her wet hair at Sydney who yelped when the cold water hit her warm body. “Who was the one waking the house up this morning with their husband?” she cocked her head and looked from one straight woman to the next and back again. “Hmmmmm?”

Both Sydney and Whitney looked at each other and shrugged, playing dumb and not willing to give the other up.

“I know it was you Syd” the brunette pinched her best friend’s big toe as she moved back to sit in her chair between the two women. “That bed squeaks like crazy, even if you’re not having sex in it.”

“Ow! So, sue me” Sydney yelped and chuckled. “It’s not my fault, Dom can’t keep his hands off me when I’m wet...there’s nothing I can do about it” she shrugged.

“Ok, that’s too much information for me” Whitney blushed and moved her attention to the dock, away from Ali and Sydney.

“Oh please, you have a baby now” Sydney playfully challenged the shy lawyer. “We may never have seen or heard you and Ryan, but we now have proof that you do actually have sex” she laughed along with Ali as Whitney couldn’t help but grin back at them. “And, for the record, I had just gotten out of the shower, that’s what I was talking about” she shook her head at the lawyer. “Such a dirty mind...it’s always the quiet ones.”

“Jesus, it’s true” Ali rolled her eyes playfully and looked at Whitney. “Don’t ever throw any sort of pool party and not expect to find those two fucking somewhere.” The brunette stopped short of outing her best friend’s actual swimming pool kink, which was really Dom’s.

“What can I say? That’s his kryptonite” she shrugged again but looked very pleased with herself. “He just can’t help himself. Like Ash with your ass” she nodded at Ali.

“Sydney” the brunette chastised with a hiss.

“Like I haven’t heard Ashlyn go on and on about your ass before” Whitney rolled her eyes this time and laughed. “Have you met your wife? She’s passionate about the things she loves” she laughed some more as Ali turned to meet her gaze with more than a little bit of a blush.

“So what’s yours Whit?” Sydney tried to get some information out of the quiet lawyer. “What is it about Ryan that you can’t resist, no matter what else is going on?”

“I’m not playing this game” she shook her head and grinned as she looked at her lap.

“Oh come on, it’s just us...” the coach cajoled with a giggle. When Whitney still stayed silent she continued, lowering her voice a bit and leaning more towards Ali. “For me it’s his dick, I don’t mean actually seeing it...well, yes I do” she cackled again before getting back on track. “I mean, like, if I can see it underneath whatever he’s got on, you know? It doesn’t even have to be hard...it’s like just knowing it’s there really gets me going.”

“So that would be every minute of every day” Ali summarized flatly, giving her bestie a doubtful look while Whitney chuckled.

“No” Sydney exhaled impatiently. “It’s obviously been a while since you’ve lived with somebody with a dick” she quirked her eyebrow at the brunette and laughed.

“Touché” Ali laughed with her, as did Whitney. “Although, technically, I live with two people that qualify.”

“Kids don’t count boo, nice try though. Sometimes when he’s getting something out of the fridge he’ll turn and I can just get a glimpse of the outline of it. Or when he’s getting out of the car after work and we watch him walk to the door...”

“Aww, you guys watch him walk to the door?” Whitney cooed and cocked her head sweetly. “That’s adorable.”

“Well, it’s a big deal when daddy comes home” Ali smiled at the thought. “You’ll do it too, just wait” she winked at the lawyer.

“Come on Whit” Syd moaned. “Help me out here. You know what I’m talking about, right?”

“Umm, yeah, I get it” she ducked her head shyly. “Especially when he’s wearing his pjs...”

“Oooh, yes, the best” Sydney nodded emphatically, “hands down, the very best for what I’m talking about. Just a little reminder of what’s really in there.”

“I get the water thing” Ali admitted with a shy giggle of her own. “I’m with Dom on that, all the way. But I think what gets me the most worked up is when she’s all dressed up. God...” she closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip. “She spends all that time getting ready and looking just right and all I want to do is get her right back out of it” she licked her lips without even realizing she was doing it.

“Damn Kriegs, let’s cool it down now” Sydney jokingly started fanning the brunette and then even herself. “Whew!”

“I like it when Ryan picks me up...you know, lifts me up or carries me” Whitney’s face was very red as she finally contributed her own kryptonite answer.

“Good one. I dated a guy once who could do that” Sydney grinned. “Made me feel light as a feather and it was sexy as hell. Dom has skills in other areas” she giggled, “but I definitely feel you on that one Whit.”

“Yep, pretty much gets me every time.”

“Alright, what’s the most creative prop he, or she, has ever used while you were having sex?” the coach lobbed another question at her friends and sipped her drink. When neither of them said anything for a long minute she continued. “I don’t mean sex toy for Christ’s sake. It can be a sex toy, but doesn’t have to be...”

“Ice cubes, well, actually it was whiskey stones” Ali surprised herself by answering the question first. “They’re basically the same thing...”

“Yeah, we know what whiskey stones are Al” Sydney chuckled. “Care to elaborate?”

“Nope” the brunette smirked and then felt a little bad when she saw the disappointment on the coach’s face. “Ok, there was a fireplace involved too but that’s all you’re getting” she giggled.

“Chop sticks” Sydney smirked and then laughed when she saw the looks on both Ali and Whitney’s faces. “Not for what you’re thinking either” she squinted at them both. “Strictly exterior use” she giggled into her glass and pointed at the lawyer. “You’re up Whit.”

There was a pause and Ali wished Whitney could have a drink with them to loosen her up a bit. But she was breastfeeding so that was a no go.

“Whipped cream, and I know that’s not creative in and of itself...” she grinned slyly, “but what he did with it sure was.”

“Alright, who are you and where’s the real Whitney Flanagan?” Ali joked and poked the lawyer in her thigh as they all laughed again.

They were only able to talk for another few minutes before Lily woke up, which meant that Dodge and Maddox wouldn’t be far behind. All three women had greatly enjoyed their little confessional conversation and promised to do it again, preferably once Whitney could drink with them. The lawyer had a good friendship with both Ali and Sydney, separate from her friendship with Ashlyn. It had taken time and proximity and trust to develop each one but it had absolutely been worth the effort. She knew she could count on both Ali and Sydney in any situation and that was a wonderful thing to know. The truth was, Whitney spent more time with Ali than anybody else in their group spent with someone other than their spouse. Ali and Whitney worked together and often saw each other every single day and they both enjoyed that aspect of their relationship. They saw a little something of themselves in each other and they always had. What had started as mutual respect based on the other being smart enough to appreciate Ashlyn Harris for the incredible human being that she was, had evolved into a true, meaningful friendship. Neither of them had any illusions about which side the lawyer would fall on if sides ever had to be drawn, but until that impossible day happened, they were very happy to call each other friend. And Whitney and Sydney had grown, and stayed, close during the very first year of Ali and Ashlyn’s friendship. They had bonded over the frustration they both felt trying to get two knuckleheads to realize they were in love with each other. If that didn’t make you become friends they didn’t know what could. The whole four-family group was close-knit and these friendships were perfect examples of the friendship, trust and love they all shared.

//

“Well if neither of you two idiots can remember which one of you told me about it I’m certainly not going to let you off the hook” Whitney laughed as she, Niki and Ashlyn cleaned up the kitchen late one night after all of the kids and most of the adults were already in bed. 

They had gone on a firefly catching expedition after dinner and bathtime that night and it had turned into a pretty involved excursion for everybody. They had to find jars, with lids, for enough of the kids so World War III didn’t break out. Then they had to make sure to wrangle and monitor and help the kids capture a firefly which was no easy task. It had gone later than planned and not been nearly as successful as anyone had hoped. Only Evan Cross and Josie Krieger had managed to catch a firefly and Ryan and Ali were right there ready to help with the lids, quickly puncturing airholes and securing the top before either lightning bug could escape. Ashlyn had set them free after the kids were in bed. She couldn’t stand the thought of keeping them trapped any longer. All the grown-ups knew exactly what was going to happen and had talked about how fireflies could only be kept for a brief period of time. It was just the way of fireflies. 

By the time everybody had gotten the kids to bed they realized that the kitchen clean-up had been abandoned to help with the expedition. Niki and Ashlyn volunteered because they were always in charge of the pontoon boat and often missed out on some of the household chores because of it. Being responsible for and taking care of the pontoon boat was a big deal and the rental agreement was very specific about the fact that only the two individuals named on the rental agreement could operate the pontoon boat. It was strictly enforced too because a few years before they started renting up at the lake, there had been a tragic boating accident on the big lake and two people, one of whom was a child, had lost their lives. Whitney, on one of her trips to the kitchen to wash out bottles and breast pump parts, had stayed to help her two friends clean up.

“Well there’s no way I told you about it” Niki shook her head solemnly and was glad they were keeping their voices low.

“Well I definitely didn’t tell her” Ashlyn shot back with a stern look. “I just fucking finally told my wife for God’s sake. I’ve been keeping your secret for 13 years dude.”

Whitney had interrupted Ashlyn and Niki talking about Dusseldorf and the coach’s past that involved public sex with a hot German model.

“It doesn’t matter who told me” Whitney squeezed one of Ashlyn’s shoulders and then moved two steps over to chuck Niki’s arm. “So you can continue your conversation if you want to...or I can just go up to bed and let you get back to it without me.”

“No, stay Whit” Niki rolled her eyes. “It doesn’t matter anyway, it’s in the past and Molly knows about it and, now, apparently, so do you and Ali” she exhaled loudly. “Maybe we should just call a big four-family meeting and make an announcement” she tried to joke but couldn’t quite pull it off.

“I didn’t tell Ali any details, she really didn’t want to know about them or you” Ashlyn tried to explain again. She had been trying to tell Niki about her talk with Ali in Dusseldorf all week long. She just wanted her friend to know. It just felt like the right thing to do. “She just wanted to know about me and what I did...”

“And you told her?” Whitney’s eyes were big as she took in the new information.

“Just the basics. But hey, nobody did anything wrong back then. I don’t know what the big deal is anyway” the keeper frowned in frustration.

“Maybe I’m not thrilled about your wife knowing about my sexual dalliances when I was in Germany...”

“But she doesn’t know about them. Well, she knows vaguely about one of them, but that’s it” Ashlyn looked nervously at the coach who still looked pissed. “I’m sorry Nik, but I couldn’t tell her about me without explaining some about you and Sasha.”

“No, I get it” Niki sighed and leaned back against the counter. “I have no one to blame but myself anyway.”

“Ash is right you know” Whitney moved to lean next to Niki and put her arm around her shoulder. “You didn’t do anything wrong and neither did she. We were all young once and we lived life and learned things and tried things and...”

“Not you” Niki cut her off with a shy smile. “You’re always so awesome and perfect. And somehow not a boring dork about it. I don’t know how you do it Whit.”

“Well, I am a boring dork” Whitney laughed softly. “That’s the trick to that, by the way. If I wasn’t, then I’d probably have something in my past that would embarrass me a little bit now too. I mean besides my hairstyles and wardrobe choices.”

Ashlyn spent the next fifteen minutes telling her two closest friends about her conversation with Ali during their time in Dusseldorf. Niki started feeling better about it the longer they talked about it but she was still embarrassed.

“Look, I know Ali seems really prim and proper sometimes...no, that’s not right” Ashlyn looked at Whitney for help finding the right descriptive words. “I mean, she comes across like she’s uptight and judgmental...”

“Damn Ash, don’t make me defend you wife to you now” Whitney quirked a challenging eyebrow at her best friend.

“No, that’s not right either, I can’t find the right words...”

“I think I get where you’re going with this” Niki nodded and waited for the keeper to finish her thought.

“She’s a lot more open-minded than people give her credit for” Ashlyn finally stated firmly. “She had her own youth and did her own learning and she would never judge anybody else for doing theirs. That’s what I’m trying to say” she took a deep breath and let it out. “She didn’t care about Sasha’s kink, as long as you were ok with it then she didn’t have a problem with any of it.”

“Really?” Niki looked skeptical but hopeful.

“I swear Nik.”

Ashlyn searched her friend’s face for some sign of forgiveness and when she didn’t find it she looked at Whitney for help. The lawyer just shrugged her shoulders as she leaned next to Niki.

“I think I’m gonna go to bed” the coach said quietly, looking at the sink to make sure they were finished with the clean up. “Thanks for telling me Ash” she gave the keeper a weak smile as she moved towards the kitchen doorway. “I’m sure I’ll be cool with it once I get used to the idea that Ali knows...”

She sounded so sad and disappointed. She looked embarrassed as her shoulders slumped and her head drooped. Ashlyn couldn’t take it anymore.

“We had sex in a club” she blurted out, unable to control herself. “In Dusseldorf, after I told Ali about my time there...”

“That was her reaction to it?” Whitney asked with her jaw on the floor in disbelief.

“Nik?” Ashlyn watched as the coach slowly turned around to reveal a look of utter shock on her face.

“If you’re making this up just to make me feel better...” Niki warned with a menacing look.

“No, God” Ashlyn closed her eyes and let her head hang back as she grasped what she had just done. She knew Ali wouldn’t mind if she told Whitney about it and she knew that her wife half expected her to tell Whitney about it. But telling Niki was probably not something Ali was going to love. It was too late now. “I’m not making it up” she replied, defeated.

Whitney, meanwhile, was starting to put the pieces together from the particularly sexy and playful talk she had shared with Ali and Sydney by the lake two days previously. She was thinking about the conversation she walked up on and the blush she had seen on Ali’s face.

“I can’t believe you guys did that” Whitney grinned at the keeper and shook her head. “But I actually believe you Ash.”

“You do?”  
“You do?”

Both Niki and Ashlyn replied simultaneously. 

“I do” Whitney chuckled. “And now you know” she quirked her eyebrow at Niki, “that Ali’s not judging you in any way so you can just let this whole mopey thing go.”

“Which club?” Niki started asking questions after nodding at the lawyer. Her mood had greatly improved. “How did you do it? Where did you do it?”

“Oh no” Ashlyn shook her head and dried her hands on the dish towel. “I’ve already said too much and she’ll kill me if this ever comes up in conversation. You guys have to promise me you’ll never bring it up anywhere near her” the keeper had a desperate look in her eyes as she pleaded with her friends. “Promise me, on your grandfathers’ graves...”

Both Niki and Whitney knew it was serious then. Ashlyn never invoked that kind of oath unless she was deadly serious. She knew how much both women had loved their grandfathers.

“I promise Ash” Whitney replied softly.

“Me too” Niki gave her a smile. “Thanks for telling me. I know it’s stupid, but that makes me feel so much better about...everything.”

“And please don’t tell Molly or Ryan...please?”

“Don’t worry, I don’t want you sleeping on my couch dude” Niki teased her and gave her a hug.

“Neither do I” Whitney chuckled again and joined the hug.

Ashlyn told her wife the next morning about her conversation with Niki and Whitney the night before. She couldn’t keep it in. She only felt guiltier. Ali had taken it well. She wished that Ashlyn had chosen a better time to share one of their most intimate secrets with two of the eight adults in the house they were all sharing for the week, but that was really her only complaint.

“You’re really ok that I told them?” the keeper asked one last time from inside her apologetic hug.

“Yeah, I am” the brunette kissed her wife’s neck as they embraced. “I mean, it was my idea and we did it and it was fucking awesome” she giggled quietly into Ashlyn’s neck and gave her another kiss there. “I told Syd the other day and it felt really good. I want you to be able to share it too” she pulled back and looked into her favorite hazel eyes. “But I will fucking kill them both if they ever bring it up in front of another living soul. I mean it Ashlyn.”

The keeper lifted Ali up off the ground and spun her around before kissing her soundly after putting her back on the ground.

“I know you do baby. I know you do.”


	35. Preparations & Repairs

The last week of August was a big transitional week. School started on Tuesday, September 2nd, the day after Labor Day. That meant that little Josie was starting preschool for the very first time. She had turned four in June and she no longer napped and she could wipe her own bum after using the potty. Those were the three requirements. She was ready. Her moms, however, were not. Ali, in particular, had a tough time with it. She had struggled when it was time for Drew to start going to school every day too, but she had thought it would be easier with her second child. She had hoped that the path Drew had slashed through her heart on his way to his first school day would make it less painful when Josie cut her own path there. But it wasn’t any easier. The brunette had always been Josie’s champion, even reminding her own wife not to coddle her too much just because she was little. Ali was always the one encouraging Josie to try and do something by herself first, just to see if she could do it. She was always right there to help her in case she couldn’t and she never made her feel like she had failed. Ali tried to make each of those experiences positive by praising her for trying so hard and being brave enough to make the attempt in the first place. But Lord did she want to keep her daughter back now. The brunette wanted, more than anything, to keep her little girl home with her and safe and secure. It was Ashlyn’s turn to remind her wife not to baby their oldest girl just because her body was smaller than almost everybody else’s her age.

That last week of summer was full of that emotion for both women as they tried to prepare themselves not only for Josie’s first day of preschool, but also Drew’s first day as a first grader. Gone were the preschool and kindergarten days for their firstborn child. He was 6 years old and officially starting the 1-12 grade system. Holy fucking shit. Each year had already seemed to go faster than the previous one, and it had only been two years so far! How on earth could their baby boy be 6 years old already? Thankfully for both Ashlyn and Ali’s sanity, they had Dodge and Lily who were still too young for school. The two-year olds went to daycare in Lynnfield with James and Maddox Dwyer most days, unless Ashlyn decided to keep them home with her. But the kids loved going to daycare so, more often than not, Ashlyn fought the urge and made the drive to daycare.

The week was also full of preparations for the joint 40th birthday party they were all having for Ashlyn, Niki and Dom on Sunday of the upcoming Labor Day weekend. Originally the party was just going to be a big beach-themed barbecue at the big old house and everyone was going to bring their kids and make an afternoon and evening of it. But as more friends and colleagues and ex-teammates heard about the big bash in the middle of the holiday weekend, the party planners realized that wasn’t going to work. The NWSL and WNBA seasons were still in full-swing as was the MLS season so that meant not everyone who wanted to attend the party would be able to. The NWHL season hadn’t started yet so the turnout would be good from that league for sure. Molly, Ali and Sydney had quickly changed tactics. The party was now going to be adults-only and they were going to host it in one of the big hotel ballrooms near the Knight-Harris office building in Cambridge. They wanted it to be a big blowout. A classic 40th birthday bash for the ages where everyone ate and drank and danced and partied all night long. Just as Ashlyn had done for Whitney’s bachelorette party years before, Molly had some games brought in and placed throughout the space so there were roughly three sections. Dance floor, buffet style eating area with tables to sit at, and the games section, all with the kickass DJ right in the middle of everything. It was much too big a party to keep a surprise so they didn’t even try. They all just patiently waited for the end of summer celebration to get there.

But before Sunday arrived, they had to get through the rest of the week. Ashlyn and Ali celebrated their official 8th wedding anniversary Monday by meeting for a fancy lunch in Boston while the twins were at daycare and Josie and Drew spent the afternoon with Grandpa Ken and Vivi. After their romantic lunch Ali surprised her wife with a couples massage in the day spa of one of the nicest hotels in the city. The brunette led Ashlyn to the elevator after getting their room key from the front desk and held her close the whole ride up to the room. Ashlyn was surprised when she pulled back once they were alone in the beautiful room.

“You’re gonna make me chase you huh?” the blonde chuckled and smiled. “You trying to make me feel old, woman? You know my leg’s been killing me...”

“And your back, and your shoulder...” Ali smiled and kept the big bed between the two of them while she slowly started to strip out of her work clothes. The nice skirt and beautiful silk blouse landing on the bed and leaving her in just some sexy lingerie. “I know all about it babe. That’s why...”

There was a knock at the door and the brunette giggled as she ran to the bathroom, calling out over her shoulder.

“You’d better let them in!”

The keeper was surprised to see two massage therapists enter the room and begin setting up the two massage tables, candles, oils, and other accoutrement that went with the intensive couples massage. Ali emerged a few minutes later in one of the plush hotel robes.

“You’d better get changed honey” she encouraged with a grin.

She waited for Ashlyn by the bathroom door and hugged her once she got close enough.

“Thank you for this baby” the keeper breathed into her wife’s neck as they embraced. “You always take such good care of me.”

“I know you’re sore from everything last week” the brunette replied, referencing the hours of wakeboarding and tubing and every other kind of physical activity Ashlyn had done with any kid that was interested. She never said no to any request no matter how tired or sore she was. “I just wanted to make you feel better. I love you.”

They kissed briefly and then pulled apart, Ali turning them so her back was to the rest of the room before flashing her wife with a quick look at her naked form beneath the robe. Ashlyn’s eyes went wide and then started to darken as she backed slowly into the bathroom to get changed.

“Hurry up” Ali giggled and pulled the door closed between them.

As much as they both wanted to stay in that hotel room for the rest of the night, they had to be home in time for dinner with the kids, picking up the twins from daycare on the way. The hour-long couples massage was wonderful and intimate even though there were two strangers standing next to them. Ashlyn held Ali’s hand or arm the whole time, neither woman wanting to lose the connection. Once the spa team had packed up and gone, Ali delivered on the promise she teased Ashlyn with between lunch and the massage. 

“Here I thought we were just gonna have a quick nooner” Ashlyn chuckled breathlessly as they made out on the bed, their slick bodies easily sliding over each other.

“Nope” Ali smirked and moved her mouth down to Ashlyn’s breast. “Full-scale afternoon delight” she sucked hard on the pretty pink bud for a few seconds. “But we have to move it along...”

“Yeah I figured...fuck...” Ashlyn groaned at the sensation. “Home in time for dinner?” she asked after another gasp.

“Yep. Didn’t want to ask too much with the party coming up” the brunette explained, mumbling around her wife’s other nipple.

“Mmmmmmmm, Jesus baby, that feels good...” Ashlyn moaned and moved her hands all over her wife’s back and shoulders and tried to reach her ass. “Smart plan, definitely” she swallowed and whimpered as Ali continued her work. “I feel like I’m ready to explode already anyway” she gave a low, throaty laugh.

“Nothing like being rubbed and touched for an hour to speed things right along” Ali joined her with a chuckle and a playful nip at the side of her breast.

“Can’t we just get into the shower? We have to wash all this oil off anyway...” the blonde whined.

“No way” Ali pulled back and looked at her wife to make sure she was paying attention. “I’m not going home with wet hair and neither are you. We’ll shower separately just to get the oil off. I don’t need my father and Vicki knowing we were having sex...”

“Oh my God Al” Ashlyn laughed out loud. “You’re such an old lady about that. Your father knows what we’re doing sweetheart...”

“Ok” Ali sat up and pushed her wife’s hands away from her with a quirk of her eyebrow. “Do you want to do this or not? Because talking about my dad right now is not a great way...”

“Fuck, you’re right” Ashlyn immediately put her hands up in surrender. “My bad, I’m so sorry. Yes I very much want to do this” she grinned and pushed the brunette backwards onto the bed before pouncing on top of her giggling wife. “Get ready baby, cuz here I come.”

//

Wednesday that week was the first day of soccer practice for the youth teams. Ali was coaching both Drew and Josie’s teams this year and she had just called an end to the practice, nodding at the other soccer dad who was the new assistant coach this year. Josie’s team didn’t have a separate practice. They just spent the first thirty minutes of game day practicing, before spending the other thirty minutes on the actual game. That’s the same way Drew’s first year of soccer had gone too. But Drew’s team had practice for an hour on Wednesdays, at 6pm down at the field. It was the first time Drew and Ethan had seen each other since the fourth of July and Horribles parade. Ali gave all of the boys a high-five as they left the field and headed to their mom or dad’s car in the parking lot. She smiled broadly when she saw how happy both Drew and Ethan looked. She had had to get their attention twice during practice because they were so excited to tell each other about their summers. 

“See you next week Adrian” she called out to the assistant coach as he walked towards his car with his hand on the top of his son’s blonde head.

“We’ll be here coach!” he waved back.

Ali spent the next couple of minutes collecting the little soccer cones while Drew and Ethan kicked all the balls towards the bag and put them away.

“Ethan, is your dad coming to get you?” she asked over her shoulder, wondering if she was supposed to drop him off and she had just forgotten.

“I’m right here, sorry, didn’t mean to startle you” Sam replied with a shy smile as he cinched up the bag of soccer balls and hefted them over his shoulder.

“Oh, Sam” Ali smiled sincerely and then felt self-conscious and wondered if that had been the right response. Then she got frustrated and just looked down and shook her head. “I didn’t know you were here” she said as plainly as she could.

“Hey, why don’t you boys drag these balls over to Ali’s truck for me ok?” he looked right at his son who walked towards him and grabbed part of the bag. Drew helped him and they started pulling the bag behind them, walking backwards, towards the parking lot. “And stay there, by the edge of the parking lot. I’ll be right there.”

Ali felt the nerves in her stomach flinch. They were standing in the middle of an empty soccer field with several cars still in the parking lot. It was far from a private moment and she felt relieved about that. She wasn’t afraid of him or nervous for her own safety or anything like that. She couldn’t explain it but she just knew in her heart that he would never have hurt her. She didn’t understand why he had kissed her again and gotten physical that afternoon in the kitchen. There was no good explanation for it and she knew that. But she just knew that he would have snapped out of it even if Ashlyn hadn’t intervened. That evening on the empty soccer pitch she was worried about what Ashlyn would think when she heard about this meeting. And she was sure she would hear about it. So many of the moms were just so damned chatty. It would probably come up in conversation one afternoon while the keeper was standing outside the school waiting to pick Drew up. The brunette knew she wasn’t doing anything wrong, but she just didn’t want her wife to worry one more second about Sam Machado. The trouble was, Ali was glad to see him. Her gut reaction when she first saw him told her that, as much as she didn’t want to admit it. She liked him and she enjoyed spending time with him. She had missed him over the summer. But nothing had changed since their January encounter. None of those nice feelings were even remotely worth a minute of angst for Ashlyn. It was not even close.

“What’s up Sam?” she asked evenly, looking at him carefully while she held the soccer cones in front of her.

“Nothing” he replied nervously, sticking his hands into the pockets of his cargo shorts and looking down. “I just...I need to tell you something and I didn’t plan on doing it tonight but here we are and...”

“Just tell me then” she encouraged, her voice warm even though she was trying to keep it steady and cool.

“Ok, yeah, right...um, you probably know Ethan and I went to Chicago for the summer and stayed with different friends” he looked up and saw the brunette nod in agreement. “It was great” he smiled genuinely and a look of happiness crossed his face. “We got to see some old friends and meet some new people and...”

“Are you moving back to Chicago?” Ali blurted out, surprised by her own impatience. All she could think of was how devastated Drew would be if Ethan moved away.

“What?” he looked confused. “No. That’s not...”

“I’m sorry” Ali apologized and blushed. “Go ahead.”

“So, yeah, so it was a nice break from things here, a really good vacation. Ethan missed Drew like crazy” he chuckled and glanced up at the brunette.

“Oh geez, so did Drew. That was brutal for a while there, wasn’t it?” she laughed.

“Yeah, they really are best buds” he smiled and looked down again. “They were so cute during practice...”

“Were you here the whole time?” Ali cocked her head, surprised.

“Yeah, I wanted to see how the team looked. I hope that’s ok?” he looked at Ali with panic in his eyes. “Was I not supposed to do that?”

“No, of course you can watch practice” Ali rolled her eyes and sighed, frustrated with the stupid rules but knowing why they were there in the first place. “I just...I mean, you didn’t have to sit in your car. You could have come and sat with the other parents if you wanted.”

“Well, I wasn’t sure and I didn’t want to risk it. I’m really trying to respect Ashlyn’s rules. I think they’re very fair and not at all too much to ask.”

They were both speaking quickly and awkwardly. Ali felt her temper spike when he called them ‘Ashlyn’s rules’. What the fuck were they doing anyway? Ali had to have rules about who she could talk to and where? Before she could go down that sticky path she shook her head and sighed heavily.

“This is so ridiculous” she shook her head again and lifted her eyes to meet Sam’s.

“No, it’s not. It’s my fault and I have to deal with it. And I am dealing with it. That’s what I wanted to tell you” he stammered but appeared to be reenergized. “I know I can’t go back and change what I did. But I want you to know that I’m past it. I...umm...I did a lot of thinking during the rest of the school year and put a lot of things in perspective.” He cleared his throat nervously before continuing. “I think I might have transferred some of my feelings for Maggie onto you, because of spending so much time with Ethan and the kids...I don’t know, that’s what my shrink says...” he stopped and looked horrified at his own admission. He cleared his throat, blushed and kept going. “And I’m dating someone now which has helped me a lot, with all of that.”

“Oh, that’s really good Sam” Ali couldn’t help but smile at the news. It had been a long, stressful, awkward seven months since the incident in January and this felt like a good step forward for all of them. She was sincerely happy for him. “I’m sure that’s difficult sometimes but I’m so glad you’re putting yourself out there again. Good for you.”

“Yeah, thanks” he smiled bashfully at her and kicked at the grass in front of him like a little boy. “She’s great and we’re pretty happy. And Ethan knows her and likes her so that’s already a big weight lifted.”

“That’s great” Ali grinned again and felt relief fill her system.

“Dad!” Ethan shouted from his spot by the edge of the parking lot. “Can I get ice cream with Drew and Ash?”

Ali’s heart stopped and she looked over to where the voice came from. Sure enough, Ashlyn was there in the minivan talking to the boys. The brunette got angry at how nervous she was about this moment. Neither one of them had done anything wrong. She shouldn’t have to feel this way.

“Oh shit” Sam looked at Ali after glancing over his shoulder. “Did I just totally fuck this up? I just wanted to tell you I was over everything...”

“No, no” Ali shook her head and smiled at him as she moved towards the minivan. She tugged on his arm so they walked together, side by side. “Don’t be silly. I’m happy for you and I’m glad you told me.”

“I want to talk to Ash too. Do you think now is a good time?” he asked anxiously.

“No, but I don’t know when a good time would be, do you?” she chuckled.

“No, I guess not” he laughed with her as they kept walking towards the minivan.

It wasn’t until later that night that Ali and Ashlyn had the chance to talk about it. After Sam had spent ten minutes talking to the keeper in private. And after Ali had taken Ethan and Drew with her and followed Ashlyn and the minivan full of the other Krieger kids to the Dairy Castle.

“So are you going to talk to me about this or what?” Ali asked, tired of waiting on pins and needles and feeling more and more powerless with every hour that had gone by since Ashlyn and Sam had spoken. 

Ashlyn had seemed normal afterwards and they had enjoyed their messy, sticky time at the Dairy Castle. The keeper had ordered Ali her favorite sundae which they had split because there’s really not a good way for both parents to eat ice cream while they’re trying to keep five excited kids calm and relatively clean at the same time.

The keeper didn’t like the edge in her wife’s voice.

“Why are you mad at me?” she asked while they rinsed ice cream out of shirts and shorts in the kitchen sink.

“What? I’m not mad at you” Ali replied with more than a little edge in her voice as they stood shoulder to shoulder at the sink.

“It sure sounds like you’re mad at me...”

“Well, I’m not” Ali snapped. “I’m just mad at the whole fucking ridiculous situation. Ok?”

“Well I don’t like it any more than you do. It’s stupid. I was so mad when I pulled up and saw you two out there together...”

“You were?” the brunette turned to look at her wife.

“Yeah, I was. And just like you said – I wasn’t mad at you, I was mad at... everything.”

Ali turned back to the sink and kept scrubbing a spot on Lily’s shirt. She wanted to ask her wife a question but she was genuinely afraid of the answer. They were quiet for a minute and then the brunette spoke, her voice quiet and afraid.

“Did you come to check up on me?”

“What?” Ashlyn frowned in confusion. It wasn’t until she glanced sideways that she saw how upset Ali was. “No, Al, I didn’t go to practice to check up on you.” She put her wet hand on Ali’s forearm and squeezed it to get her attention when she didn’t react to her answer. “Baby, no I did not do that. I swear...”

“I believe you” the brunette responded softly and looked down at the small pink shirt in her hands.

“And I trust you” Ashlyn spoke slowly and seriously and turned the water off. She turned her body and faced Ali’s side, pulling both of the brunette’s hands away from the sink and holding them. “Honey, I trust you. I just wanted to see if you guys wanted to come get ice cream. That’s it. I promise.”

“Ugh, it felt so awful, all of it” Ali finally turned and looked into her favorite hazel eyes. “I was so happy to see him at first, before my mind kicked in and I remembered that I wasn’t supposed to be seeing him. Then I got furious about that...”

“Mad at me?” Ashlyn interrupted.

“No, Ash, never at you. It’s not your fault we’re in this mess. The whole thing just makes me mad. Mostly I’m mad at him and then at me. But not you babe.”

“The only one to be mad at is him Ali. Don’t forget that.”

“I don’t want to be mad at anybody!” she yelled, frustration finally boiling over. “I feel like an idiot looking over my shoulder when I see him. Do you know that I actually counted the cars in the parking lot and decided that it was good that there were 7 of them because that meant there were lots of people who could see that there was nothing going on between us. How fucking stupid is that?!”

“I know...I know...” Ashlyn tried to soothe her.

“You’re not the one who feels like the whole world knows she cheated...”

“No, but I’m the one who feels like the whole world knows my wife cheated on me...”

They stared at each other for a long minute, just breathing and trying not to explode. Neither of those things was true and nobody knew the first thing about what happened between Sam and Ali. They both knew that Ali hadn’t cheated or done anything of the sort. But there were their hidden fears flung out between them with the ice cream stains.

“Fuck” Ali closed her eyes as the word slipped through her lips.

Ashlyn grabbed her by both biceps and shook her until the brunette met her fiery gaze.

“You didn’t cheat on me. I don’t think you did. I never thought you did. I know you never would” she gave Ali a little shake after each firm statement.

“I would never cheat on you Ashlyn...never ever...” she pulled her keeper into a hug and buried her face into her chest as tears fell down her cheeks. “I’m so sorry honey.”

“Shhhhhh...baby it’s ok” Ashlyn kissed the top of her head and held her tightly in her arms. “It’s not your fault. It’s ok. We’re ok. Everything’s fine.”

They stood there for several minutes, both deep in thought but not wanting to let go of each other just yet. Finally Ali spoke again, her voice raw from crying but sounding much less anxious than it had before.

“Did he tell you about this summer? About the woman he’s dating? That’s why he came out to the field to talk to me. He stayed in his car the whole practice because he didn’t want to break the rules” she chuckled sadly. “Isn’t that pathetic?”

“Oh, man, that is pathetic” Ashlyn sighed heavily. “That’s not what I meant to happen...” she squeezed her wife’s shoulders one more time before they pulled apart and got back to the task at hand. “And yes, he told me about his girlfriend in Chicago. And he told me that that’s why he was talking to you.”

“Part of why I was mad was that I was happy to see him” Ali confessed quietly as she wrung out Lily’s shirt and reached for Dodge’s shorts in the sink.

“Yeah, Josie almost had a fit when I told her Sam wasn’t coming with us to get ice cream” the keeper added. “How did it get so fucked up? It would have been so fun if he could have come with us.”

“And we’d probably be working on a lot fewer ice cream stains right now” Ali giggled softly.

“That’s a fact” Ashlyn chuckled and bumped her wife’s hip.

They scrubbed a few more chocolate spots and one strawberry, Dodge loved strawberry ice cream that summer for some reason, and were quiet for several more minutes. 

“Sarah thinks you’ll find a way to forgive him. She thinks it’ll just take time” Ali said evenly, knowing it might be too soon to even broach the idea of forgiveness for such an unforgiveable offense.

“You told Sarah?!”

“Ummm...” Ali paused, surprised by the heat in her wife’s voice. She was prepared for it but about Sam, not in response to her telling Sarah the story.

“What in the world made you tell our big secret to Sarah?!” Ashlyn didn’t look at her wife, she just focused on the sink, jaw clenched.

“I didn’t plan on telling her, she asked me why Sam wasn’t at the party for The Academy last week. I tried to avoid it but...”

“She knows you can’t lie to save your life” Ashlyn sighed.

“I’m sorry Ash. It never occurred to me that you’d be upset if I told her...”

“Except that we agreed we weren’t telling anybody” the keeper shot an irritated look her wife’s way.

“Yeah, but you told Whitney...”

“And you told Syd and Kyle. Just like we both knew we would.”

“You’re right” Ali nodded slowly, not understanding why her keeper was so upset. “I didn’t mean to tell her...”

“I know you didn’t” she sighed again and rolled her shoulders, her neck cracking loudly. “I don’t know why I’m surprised. I guess...I guess I’m just embarrassed.”

“Embarrassed?” Ali scrunched up her face and looked at her emotional wife. “Why would you be embarrassed?”

“Al, I like Sarah a lot and I’m glad we’re all friends, but she’s not the person I’d like to know all of our dirty secrets” the blonde sighed again, blushed a little bit and wrung out the shirts and shorts she had scrubbed. “I’m gonna get the dirty laundry. I’ll be right back.”

Ali furrowed her brow as her mind tried to work through this new wrinkle in the scenario. She watched her wife climb the backstairs and then carried all of the wet clothes over to the washing machine in the mudroom. She was deep in thought, leaning on both hands against the drier and staring off into space. She jumped when Ashlyn put the laundry basket full of dirty clothes on the floor in front of the washing machine next to her.

“Hey, listen” the brunette started slowly, mind still racing. “I’m not sure what to tell you Ash. I could be way off-base here but I want to give it a try” she looked nervously at the blonde who was pulling dark clothes out of the laundry basket and tossing them into the front-load washing machine, bent over at the waist. “Sarah got weird at the end of our conversation too and I didn’t understand it then. But now, now that we’re talking about this, I think I hurt you both, a lot, way back then, before Sarah ended things. I didn’t mean to, but I did. And as far as we’ve come, which is a long fucking way – I know it is, those hurt feelings come up every once in a while.” She paused and tossed the dark and damp clothes from the sink into the washing machine, watching for any response from Ashlyn. “And I don’t know what to do about it, other than to tell you that I love you Ashlyn and I’ve always loved you. And as much as we say we wouldn’t change a thing about how we were friends first and got to know each other...I wish I had been brave enough to tell you how I felt sooner. And I sure as hell wish I’d broken up with Sarah then too.” She took a deep breath and let it out as Ashlyn stood up, closed the circular door and pushed buttons on the washing machine to start it. The keeper turned to face her wife and sighed again as she leaned against the large appliance and folded her arms across her chest. Ali swallowed and continued. “But babe, I don’t tell Sarah anything about us. It’s not like that. Somehow, without talking about it, we’ve always just sort of talked about everything else but that stuff. With Erin too. We keep our wives to ourselves. Except for that one time I told her about Emily...but you knew I was going to do that and you...”

“It’s ok Al, relax” the keeper closed her eyes and exhaled loudly, cutting her wife off and taking one of her hands. “I’m usually much more ok with you and Sarah being friends. I swear, I really am” she met Ali’s gaze and they could both see the truth and honesty reflecting back. “This Sam thing is tough enough, I guess it just felt like a sucker punch hearing you add Sarah into it tonight. I don’t know” she shrugged.

“I get it. At least I think I do” Ali stepped closer and rubbed her keeper’s arm with her free hand. “I wouldn’t have talked to her at all about it except that she sniffed Sam out way back last Fall, remember? When we were measuring up at The Academy and Sam and Whit were looking at the kitchen?”

“Yeah, I remember you telling me that” Ashlyn nodded and intertwined their fingers, rubbing her thumb across the brunette’s skin. “And that’s why she brought it up at the party last week” she nodded again. “It makes perfect sense. Sarah was always really smart. Of course she’d pick up on all of that. And she surprised you by asking about it and you spilled your guts” she smiled softly at Ali, but the smile didn’t last long.

“I’m sorry honey. I didn’t mean to make it even worse. I can’t seem to get out of this stupid mess no matter how hard I try” Ali sighed and dropped her eyes.

They held hands and were quiet for a few more minutes as they both tried to work past the new obstacle.

“So she thinks I’ll be able to forgive him huh?” Ashlyn eventually broke the silence with a shy question, looking up through her lashes at her beautiful brunette.

“Yeah, she does” Ali shrugged and cupped her wife’s face with her free hand. “She’s got kind of a unique perspective on that I guess” she smiled tentatively, not sure if Ashlyn was ok enough to poke fun yet.

“She sure does” the keeper smiled back and pulled Ali into a hug, leaning her chin over her shoulder. “My issues with Sarah are my issues and I usually have them under control. That’s the truth” she pulled her head back to look at Ali’s face.

“I believe you babe” Ali kissed her lips gently.

“And maybe she’s right, who knows?” she moved her chin back to Ali’s shoulder and squeezed her wife tight. “When I really think about it and try and take out the jealousy and the anger, I was disappointed that Sam wasn’t at the party. I told you I hoped he would come and I meant that. And I was glad to see him tonight too, once the initial wave of rage passed over me. And that’s the first time I’ve seen him and not wanted to punch him in the face. So I’m making progress.”

“Ashlyn” it was Ali’s turn to pull her head back so she could lock eyes with the blonde. “Listen to me carefully now. This goes for both Sarah and Sam and I mean it. If you don’t want them in our lives...if it’s upsetting you and making things weird or hard between us then they’re gone. It would really make me sad to lose Sarah’s friendship, I can’t lie to you, but you’re worth so much more to me and I won’t risk what we have. Not for anybody.”

Ashlyn could see by the look in her eyes that the brunette meant every word she said. It was a tremendous offer, an enormous commitment to the well-being of their marriage, and the keeper was moved beyond measure. She didn’t want to cut Sarah or Erin or Daphne out of their lives and she had no intention of letting Ali think that would ever be a possibility. Sam was the problem and Ashlyn couldn’t make the same statement about him yet. She knew Ali didn’t expect her to either. With so many powerful emotions swirling around her, the keeper felt her heart surge. She kissed her wife deeply and slowly as she hugged her even tighter. It was a kiss of promises made and love shared and hurt feelings healed. It was a kiss that told them both that they were going to be ok, regardless of what happened with Sam Machado in the long run. When they finally broke the kiss for air, they leaned their foreheads together and held each other close. 

“You are the most amazing woman” Ashlyn brushed the back of her fingers against her wife’s cheek. “I love the way you love me and I promise you Ali, I promise you I’ll never take it for granted. Thank you.”

“I mean it Ashlyn, you just tell me and we’ll make changes...”

“No, honey, no” the keeper covered Ali’s mouth with her fingers and grinned when the brunette pressed a soft kiss into them in return. “I’m fine with Sarah. More than fine. And maybe she’s right about Sam. I don’t know yet. But you know how I feel about second chances” she sighed, but this time it was more contented than anything else. “Let’s just see how it goes with him. We’ll keep talking about it. Maybe we should go see Mattie about it again or something.”

“Yeah, let’s do that. Just to be sure. This is too important and I don’t want to keep fucking it up” Ali added once the blonde moved her fingers away.

“Besides, seeing how happy Drew was to be with Ethan again really made me think hard about all of this anyway. That’s gotta factor in and if I was a better person I wouldn’t be thinking about anything other than Drew’s happiness.”

“No way Ash. You know that’s not true. We’ve read the same articles about this” Ali quirked her eyebrow at her wife. “If the marriage isn’t working the kids aren’t happy. That’s why they all say to keep your relationship a priority instead of just sacrificing everything for the kids...”

Ashlyn interrupted her wife again, pressing another romantic kiss to her lips. She felt Ali giggle against her lips and slipped her tongue into her mouth to surprise the brunette. Ali gasped and then added her own tongue to the kiss, moaning into it. They stayed there, embracing and kissing for a few minutes, giggling a good deal as well. When they separated to catch their breath they both looked relaxed for the first time since Sam had come back into their lives that evening. They were still feeling some of the lingering effects from their afternoon delight two days before and had been extra touchy with each other ever since.

“Wanna go upstairs?” Ali wagged her eyebrows.

“Always” Ashlyn winked. “But we have to put this other load of laundry in first.”

“I admire your work ethic, as always babe, but really?” she quirked an eyebrow at the blonde.

“Just wait an hour and a half, then it’s a date” Ashlyn grinned and her dimple appeared.

“You’re serious...” Ali chuckled. “What’s so important in that laundry basket” she looked down and nudged the basket with her foot.

“Miss Josephine needs her Wonder Woman costume for the birthday party tomorrow” she smiled as she answered, loving the fact that this was one of the rare occasions when she was reminding Ali of one of the kids’ events. “She asked me three times after you left for practice tonight. I promised her it would be ready for her when she got dressed in the morning.”

“Gotta keep the promise” Ali nodded and smiled widely at her incredible wife. “So we have some time to kill...wanna make out instead?”


	36. Forever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut warning

The 40th birthday bash was one of the best parties any of their group had ever thrown. It was probably because it was for three different people and they each had a bunch of friends and colleagues join in. But Molly, Ali and Sydney really outdid themselves. Whitney helped too, but the three planners didn’t really ask her to do too much, except make sure to get a babysitter for the night so she and Ryan could come out and party with everybody. Kyle and Nathan came up from New York for the whole weekend and stayed with Nathan’s parents in Ipswich. Chris and Beth Harris flew up and stayed at the big old house for the weekend. It was a rare trip away for just the two of them and they were grateful that Tammye and Carol and Mike were holding down the fort for them at home. Ashlyn’s friend Liz was flying up from Satellite Beach too. The keeper bought her plane ticket to make up for missing her 40th birthday while she was over in Germany. Koty and his wife Brianna came and Tanner Wild, in the middle of his second season of MLS play, brought a big group of his teammates too. They couldn’t stay too long because they had a home game the next day to be ready for. There were about twenty soccer players, from international stars to bench players in the NWSL, who came to show the rest of the partygoers how soccer players do their 40th. There would have been about twice as many except the NWSL season was still going on and it was hard for some players to get away. Most of Ashlyn’s contemporaries had retired by then so all of the usual suspects were there: the UNC gals, her ex-Breakers teammates, many of her ex-Spirit teammates too, like Joanna Lohman. Almost all of the employees at Knight-Harris as well as the Mental Health Initiative showed up to tell their founder and friend Happy Birthday. Julian Edelman, Danny Amendola and Tom Brady all showed up which made everybody nervous as hell. The former Patriots players were having a big reunion themselves that weekend so they were all in town. Hilary Knight made the trip East and joined several fellow hockey players, past and present. And Kamala Pierce, who had grown into one of the stars of the WNBA, attended with a group of her teammates, celebrating a big win earlier in the afternoon. And that was just Ashlyn’s contingent of guests!

Niki and Molly both came from large families and they were all there. Niki also had a lot of soccer teammates from her NWSL days make the trip too. Dom had a bunch of colleagues from his current job with the NE Revolution and Boston Breakers as well as his previous physical therapist position in Boston. His parents flew over from London for the weekend and were at the Dwyer house in Lynnfield babysitting the two youngest kids for the night of the party. Sandi Leroux took Cassius for night and Ken and Vicki took Drew and Josie for the night and they all hung out together until bedtime up in Ipswich. That left Dodge and Lily for Deb and Mike Christopher at home in Gloucester. The Cross kids went to grandparents too and Ryan Flanagan’s mom made the trip up from Long Island to watch baby Becca for the night. All kids covered.

All of Ali’s friends who had become Ashlyn’s friends over the years were there too, most of them there for Dom as well. Carm and Kacey. Jessie and her on-again, off-again boyfriend Everett. Heather and her husband Dave. Erica and Liz both came solo. Then there were the former Breakers who had become very good friends with both Ashlyn and Ali like Kristie Mewis and her husband Ted, and Cat Whitehill and her husband Rob. And, of course, Sarah and Erin. After the brunette realized the tender feelings still buried deep for both Sarah and Ashlyn, she thought about asking the architect not to come. But, after talking to Kyle about it, she decided that would just make everything worse. She would have to trust her wife when she said she was normally perfectly fine with Sarah and keep moving forward. Julie and Neil Donaldson were there, along with a handful of other parents from Gloucester that Ashlyn had gotten friendly with over the past two years that Drew had been in school.

There were some people who were invited just to be polite. Nobody expected them to show up for a number of reasons: they were older, they were too rich and important to care, or too busy to be able to make it. Bob Kraft, Steven Dudley, and three other very rich, older men who were board members for the MHI, all spent some time at the party that evening. Bob Kraft was the only one that anybody really wanted to hang around. They were all nice and well-meaning, but Ali wanted to cut loose and have fun, not worry about what her old boss might be thinking of her or her wife or the party. 

Kyle warned his sister-in-law that Lady Gaga might make a surprise appearance at the party but neither Ashlyn nor Ali believed him. The superstar was on her way to Europe to start the second leg of her tour later in September. It was easy enough for her to make a quick stop in Boston for one night. The rest of the tour didn’t even have to wait for her, they could just keep right on going to Brussels and she would catch up one day later. The party had been a huge success and nobody had gotten too drunk or out of hand. Or maybe they had and somebody else just handled it before any of the party organizers realized it. That was the hidden, secret benefit to having sober people in your posse. They never got drunk or out of control and they were always ready to lend a hand. Of course, this only worked if you didn’t abuse their generous assistance. If Ali or Ashlyn had a big boozy party every month, the routine would get pretty old and people like Kyle, Koty and Chris wouldn’t bother to come anymore. But that wasn’t the case. So when one of the family did have a blow-out party those kind, sober folks were happy to let them let loose and have fun. They knew it was a special occasion and that nobody took them for granted. Even the crazy partiers like Carm, Jessie, Kristie, or even Ashlyn’s Liz seemed to go nuts without taking it over the top. It was just an awesome party and nobody wanted it to end. Most of the guests were staying in hotels in the city, and many were even staying in the same hotel where the party was. Super convenient to just take the elevator up to your room and pass out in comfort, only having to worry about the hangover that was coming your way in the morning.

As the party started to wind down around 1am, there were small groups scattered around the huge room. It had been a dressy party, the invitations asked all the guests to help celebrate the birthday honorees in style with their best fashion, and everyone who had worn a suit had long been down to their shirtsleeves with their bowties or neckties loosened or draped around their necks. The tables all had pairs of beautiful, fancy designer heels tossed under them and almost every woman who had worn a dress was dancing or walking around barefoot or in just their hose. Smiles were big and laughter was loud even though there were a couple of quite serious conversations happening in different places in the room.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Ali’s voice was high and strident as she sat up straight at the table with Liz and Sydney who were still hunched over and speaking as quietly as possible. “Why are you just telling us this now?!” she practically yelled at Liz.

“Al, calm down” Sydney pulled on her arm and gave her best friend a stern look. “And shut the fuck up, will you?” she glanced nervously around the area to see if anyone had noticed Ali’s outburst.

“Don’t tell me to shut the fuck up” Ali shot back at the coach with her own glare. “I can’t fucking believe this” she shook her head as she leaned in towards the two other women again.

“We’re trying not to make a scene, that’s all” Liz offered anxiously, her eyes watching for Erica’s return from the bathroom any minute. “I knew I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“I’m gonna kill him” Ali growled, her face filled with fury. “I’m gonna fucking kill that bastard. What a piece of shit...”

“Here she comes” Sydney dug her nails into Ali’s thigh. “Cool it.”

But Ali had about as good a chance of cooling her boiling rage as she did winning the lottery without buying a ticket. It only took Erica two minutes to figure it out.

“You fucking told them didn’t you?” she looked accusingly at Liz and started to reach under the table for her shoes so she could get up and leave the party. “I knew this would happen...” she muttered angrily.

“Hey, you” Ali spoke loudly from two seats away at the large, round table. Both Sydney and Liz were between she and Erica on one half of the table. She spoke louder when Erica didn’t respond. “E! I know you can hear me so just fucking look at me.”

Erica looked up with a mixture of anger and regret on her face. She sighed heavily and met Ali’s emotion-filled gaze. When Ali didn’t say anything immediately, Erica quirked her eyebrow impatiently.

“What?”

“I love you. And you’re fucking awesome. And you’re going to have a great life even though it won’t be exactly like you planned it.” Ali paused to try and keep from crying, the tears welling up in her eyes as she spoke emphatically to one of her best friends. Erica’s face looked similar as she took in the fired-up brunette’s heartfelt words. “And fuck that asshole” Ali wiped angrily at a tear that had slipped down her cheek. “He doesn’t deserve you.” 

Ali got up and pulled Erica up into a tight hug that they kept going for a solid three minutes. Each woman embracing the other tightly with their chins over their shoulders and their eyes squeezed shut, tears running down both faces. 

“I should go...” Erica said softly as they pulled apart.

“No, please stay E” Ali pleaded with a warm smile. “Please don’t go. We want to be here for you, with you...”

Before they could finish their conversation, there was a murmur that moved across the room, starting at the back and travelling quickly all the way to the front. The DJ stopped the music and everybody wondered what the hell was going on.

“How’s everybody doing tonight?” a familiar voice called out from the front of the room. The DJ ran from his spot in the middle of the room to the piano in the front corner of the room, his cordless microphone in his hand. “There we are, that’s better. Can everybody hear me now?”

“Is that...” Erica paused with a stunned look on her face as she and Ali trained their eyes on the piano.

“Lady fucking Gaga” Ali breathed out slowly. “Holy shit.”

“Oh my God” Erica squeezed Ali’s hand.

“Well you can’t leave now.”

To say that the people who had left the party earlier were disappointed when they heard about the surprise guest who showed up just after 1am would be the understatement of the decade. Chris Harris was in his glory. What were the chances he was going to meet Lady Gaga twice in his life? Everybody was starstruck. Even Mia Hamm, a giant in her field, was reduced to a wide-eyed fangirl when she was introduced by Ashlyn. The superstar played about five songs, taking requests from Ashlyn Niki and Dom. After that she took Ashlyn’s arm and had her walk her back to the keeper’s table near the back of the room. 

“So this is the woman with the magic” Lady Gaga smiled warmly at Ali when they were finally introduced in person for the very first time. “I’ve heard so much about you. It’s great to finally meet you.”

Ali stuck her hand out, trying to be professional and not lose her shit, but Gaga pulled her into a hug. The brunette couldn’t believe how tiny the superstar was. Without her 6” heels she was only 5’1”. She wore a floor length, shimmery, loose and flowing evening gown that she made look as if it was as comfortable as a fluffy robe.

“Same here” Ali tried to get the words to come out of her mouth in the correct order. “Ash is always telling me how great you are...you being here is just the sweetest thing...”

“Oh I’d do anything for this one” Gaga leaned into the keeper and smiled up at her. “But just look at the way she looks at you” she grinned back at the brunette. “Wow, I didn’t think she could get any more gorgeous, but I was wrong. She practically glows when she looks at you Ali.”

Both Ashlyn and Ali were blushing as one of the greatest entertainers in the world gushed compliments at them. The keeper snapped out of it first, much more used to her friend Gaga than Ali or anybody else in the room could be.

“And I see the family resemblance” Gaga nodded when Kyle came over and gave his sister a side hug. “Definitely” she smiled and squeezed Kyle’s grinning cheeks. “And who else do we have here?”

Gaga couldn’t have been more gracious as Ashlyn, with Ali by her side, introduced her to their closest friends. Ali made sure Erica got to meet her right at the beginning, squeezing Ashlyn’s hand to let her know she really needed it to happen. When they got to the next table over, Mia Hamm and Nomar Garciaparra stood up to shake her hand first.

“Oh please” Gaga’s eyebrows went up to her hairline. “I was 13 years old when you won the world cup. You 99ers were so big and so awesome that even us theater geeks knew who you were” she laughed as she hugged the soccer star. “You not so much” she teased the ex-Red Sox player, jokingly referring to the well-documented hatred between Red Sox fans and Yankees fans.

It was an incredibly surreal night, early morning more accurately. Nobody left once Gaga arrived. Excited phone calls home were made and plans were changed and babysitters’ duties were extended. Gaga was lovely and engaging and personable, as if she didn’t realize that the whole world had stopped spinning as soon as she entered the room. Ali swore to God she would never in a million years get over the fact that she played four consecutive games of cornhole with the superstar as her teammate.

“Oh no, I want Ali on my team” Gaga had stated definitively, pulling the brunette’s arm towards her. “I’ve heard more stories about you kicking everybody’s ass at these games...I’m not dumb.”

And luckily Ali was able to perform on demand. The duo defeated Sydney and Erica first, then Carm and Kacey who were cocky as hell, then Mia and Nomar who Ali was convinced had thrown the game, then Ashlyn and Hilary Knight. They all stayed up until 4am when the hotel manager discreetly and politely told Molly that they needed to prepare the room for a Labor Day brunch. He offered them a smaller room to continue the celebration with Lady Gaga but the superstar took advantage of the schedule conflict and made her exit. As sad as they all were to see her go, just she and her two bodyguards slipping into the elevator just after 4:30am, it meant they could all go home or to their rooms as well. It had been an exhilarating, unbelievable three hours, but everyone was exhausted.

“Next time we get together you have to tell me about this mostaccioli bake recipe that you’ve perfected. Everybody raves about it” she said as she hugged Ali goodbye. 

“Sure thing” Ali chuckled, impressed that the superstar remembered the idle chat about their shared Italian upbringing. Gaga was only two years younger than Ali and they had a lot of the same experiences growing up in Italian families. “Gotta keep the old Italian traditions alive and well.”

By 5am the core group of about 30 people had moved into that smaller room the hotel manager had offered them and were enjoying breakfast, courtesy of the hotel for the friends of Lady Gaga. Nobody said much at first, they were all too tired and freaked out at the three-hour dream they had all just experienced at the same time. But after they had eaten and been bolstered by calories and sugar the conversations started. Ali and Sydney were careful not to let Erica or Liz slip away from the group and sat with them while they all ate breakfast. They agreed to meet for lunch so they could talk before heading home that afternoon and then went up to their rooms to get some sleep. 

“So what happened? What can we do to help? What do you need?” Ali and Sydney spoke at the same time, overlapping each other like two friends that have known each other for over 30 years.

Erica took her time and told them the sad tale of how her husband had decided he wasn’t cut out for fatherhood after all and had left her back at the end of July. He had moved out of their house in Middleton and filed for divorce but she hadn’t signed the papers yet. He wasn’t asking for custody or visitation rights to see their 3-year old daughter Maisy. He just wanted out. 

“Erica, why didn’t you tell me?” Ali asked, her voice full of emotion. “I would have been there for you, right by your side...”

“Me too E” Sydney added quietly.

“I know” Erica sighed. “I’m sorry, I just...I didn’t want to tell anybody. I still don’t. But I can’t pretend anymore. It’s happening and I just have to get through it.” They were quiet for a minute. “And you were in Germany.”

“But I would have come home” Ali grabbed her friend’s hand next to her on the table. “I would have come right home boo.”

“I know you would” Erica managed a small smile. “That’s another reason I decided to wait. Then I got good at waiting” she shrugged.

“I don’t understand” Ali shook her head slowly as they sat around a cozy corner table in the restaurant of the hotel. “I thought things had gotten better after you started going to couples counseling last Fall?”

“They did. He was much better for a few months and then he stopped going with me. That was January. He went back to his old habits of disappearing again. But I guess those five months when it was good was all an act...”

“Maybe wishful thinking” Sydney interrupted. “I’m not making excuses, but maybe he really tried and it still just didn’t work for him. Doesn’t mean he was faking it. Maybe he really tried. I’d like to think that anyway.”

“Well, whatever he did or didn’t do, he ultimately decided he didn’t want to be a dad” Liz added, trying not to sound so hateful. She had been the only one Erica told. She hadn’t even told her sister until a couple of weeks ago. Liz hated Tom even more than Ali seemed to last night. “But get this” she leaned forward and looked at Erica to make sure it was ok to continue. Erica gave the tiniest nod and got back to trying to eat some of her lunch. “He told her he still loved her and loved being married to her.”

“Well what the fuck is she supposed to do with that?” Ali straightened her back again, temper flaring. “Oh, here, let me just give our child away so we can go back to the marriage the way you preferred it. Yeah, let’s do that. Jesus fucking Christ. I’m sorry E, but what the hell?”

“That’s when I lost it” Erica replied sadly. “I just can’t believe that someone that I thought I knew better than anyone else on the planet could change something so important so fast. Maisy’s three and he’s had one foot out the door since she was born. I just kept thinking he would change. Everything I read, everybody I talked to said to just give him time. He didn’t need time. He...just doesn’t want us” her voice cracked as she finished.

“Did he really think there was some way in hell that you would give your baby up just to be with him?” Sydney couldn’t get over that part of Tom’s situation.

“I don’t know if he thought there was a chance of that happening or if he was just trying to make me feel better, you know, give me a compliment.”

“Yeah, I guess, maybe” Ali pondered the idea. “I can see that. He was trying to make sure you knew that it wasn’t you or your fault. It’s still a shitty thing to say and an even shittier thing to do. God, I’m so sorry E.”

“So, now you all know. Once I can bring myself to sign the divorce papers, I’m keeping the house...”

“Well I should hope so, you fucking paid for it” Sydney snapped before she could stop herself. It had long been a sore spot with Ali, Liz and she that Erica not only paid for the house but also paid off most of Tom’s student loans from his years of dental school. She made good money as a pharmaceutical rep and she chose to do both those things with her money, but her best friends didn’t like it. “I’m sorry. I can’t help it. I’m so angry right now...you’ve had some time to process this but it’s fresh and hot for me right now.”

“Syd it’s ok. I know you never liked him” Erica smiled softly at the coach.

“That’s not true, we all really liked him a lot” Ali chimed in looking at both Sydney and Liz as she spoke. “I think that’s why we’re so mad, well, I won’t speak for them. That’s why I’m so mad. I loved Tom, except for the cheating thing which took a while to get past for me. But I never saw this coming E. I would have told you if I had any idea he would do this to you and Maisy.”

“None of us saw this coming” Liz agreed sadly. “But if he doesn’t want to be a part of your awesome life then that’s his loss. I don’t like him anymore and I don’t ever want to see him again, if I’m being completely honest.”

“That makes two of us” Sydney agreed quickly. “And Liz is right. Fuck him. It’s his loss and you and Maisy are awesome and we’re all gonna be here for you. Whatever you need E. Always” she stretched her hand out, palm up, towards Erica and waited for her to take it. Once she did, Sydney squeezed it and gave her a watery-eyed smile. “Always.”

Ali tried to put on a happy face when she saw her wife again after Ashlyn’s lunch with the UNC crew, but the keeper saw right through it. They met back in their hotel room and hugged for a long time without saying anything. After about fifteen minutes Ali finally sat up on the bed and rubbed her face with both hands while her keeper’s hand rested on her lower back.

“I should go. The kids will be driving everybody crazy by now and you need to go have fun with all of your friends” she turned and smiled at Ashlyn, leaning against the headboard behind her. “Don’t leave me. Ok?”

“Awww, baby” Ashlyn tried to pull her back into her arms again but Ali resisted.

“No, don’t, I won’t be able to leave if you do that” she scooched further away from the blonde. “I’ll be ok. I just need to know you’re not going to one day, all of a sudden, decide you don’t want me or the kids anymore.”

The look on Ali’s face broke her wife’s heart into a thousand pieces. It was sad and afraid and a little bit angry all at the same time. Her lower lip quivered just a bit and her eyes were still red from crying. She was fucking gorgeous and Ashlyn loved her with every one of those thousand pieces, and then some.

“Al, that is never ever going to happen. Not ever” she shook her head slowly and seriously as she locked eyes with her beautiful brunette. “Remember, I’m always afraid you’re going to get sick of me” she tried to say it with a chuckle to try and lighten the mood but it didn’t work. “I’m the one who married up honey and I know it. I’m just happy to be here and I’m trying hard not to screw it up” she did chuckle that time, as did Ali. They exchanged small, tentative smiles and held the one hand that could reach between them. 

“You didn’t marry up, you big goof. I did and I know it.” Ali paused for a few seconds and took a deep breath. “Thank you for being so...you. You’re perfect and I don’t want to think about losing you, ever. I love you Ashlyn.”

“I love you Alexandra Krieger and that just keeps growing and growing. I’m never gonna leave you sweetheart, not ever.” 

//

It wasn’t until three nights later, after getting through the emotional first day of school for Josie and Drew on Tuesday and then another soccer practice on Wednesday with a brief Sam Machado interaction, that Ali and Ashlyn got to release some of the stress that had built up over the past five days. It had felt like one wave after another crashing into Ali’s heart, battering it until it threatened to come loose from its’ moorings. Erica’s sad news was enough to rock Ali’s world without the emotional trauma of taking her baby girl to preschool for the very first time. The brunette felt like her heart was hanging on by a thread, just about to get washed out to sea, never to return. She didn’t know what to do to make it feel better or how to fix it. She felt more than a little lost and very fragile. 

It was a school night so there was no ice cream after Drew’s soccer practice. Ashlyn kept the three young Kriegers at home and fought her way through bathtime as best she could by herself. Ali and Drew got home at 7:30 and the brunette got him bathed and ready for bed, hoping to catch up to everybody else before Ashlyn was finished reading to them. She led him by the hand into Josie’s room, moisturizer and pajamas in her other hand. Storytime was usually in either Drew or Josie’s room because they had the extra twin beds in each room. Sometimes storytime was in the master bedroom too, but not very often. They were reading books together, as a family. Either Ali or Ashlyn would read to all four kids, both dogs, and hopefully, the other mom as they all snuggled together and listened. They had started with ‘The Little Prince’, naturally, but had gone on to start and finish the whole Amelia Bedelia series as well as various other kids books that they loved themselves growing up. Ali turned Drew around and finished putting the moisturizer on him, then helped him into his pajamas as they listened to Ashlyn reading ‘A Wrinkle in Time’. The brunette sat on the bed and towel-dried his hair while he leaned between her legs and tried to listen. In another few minutes it was 8:30pm and time to go to sleep. Josie was the luckiest, already in her bed and snuggled in tight. Drew scampered across the hallway to wait his turn while Ashlyn carried Dodge and Ali carried Lily to their rooms to tuck them in.

At 9:00pm Ashlyn finally pulled Drew’s door closed after getting the rundown on practice and promising to read him the part of the story he had missed tomorrow. She closed the master bedroom door behind her and leaned against it as she watched her beautiful wife sorting through the blouses and suits and skirts and slacks in her closet straight ahead of her, but way up by the head of the bed. Ali was all the way on the other side of the room but she was the only thing the keeper could see. Ashlyn knew her wife was struggling that week and she had been trying to help as much as she could. The brunette was always appreciative of the sweet words and kind gestures her keeper said and made but it wasn’t really helping. Ali seemed lost, adrift in sadness. The keeper knew she was fighting it but, so far, Ali wasn’t winning. As she watched the brunette pull clothes out of the closet to make a pile to take to the dry cleaners in the morning, she saw her tuck her hair behind her ear and chew on her bottom lip while deciding about a certain suit jacket. She still had her shorts and t-shirt on from soccer practice and her shoulder-length hair was in a loose ponytail at the back of her head, wisps of brunette hair falling around her face. Ashlyn watched her wife’s arms move quickly once she made her decision and her legs and body act swiftly and strongly at the same time. As long as she lived, the keeper would never get tired of watching her beautiful brunette. It didn’t matter what she was doing, she looked spectacular doing it. 

Ali reached up onto the shelf for something and, in the process, held a pose with one leg stretched out behind her for balance while she leaned forward to reach to the back of the high shelf. Her muscles tensed as she stretched again, hopping just a bit to make the final grab. Ashlyn felt a throb in her core as she saw her wife’s butt bounce at the end of the hop. As she watched, she licked her lips without even realizing she was doing it. Ashlyn reached behind her and locked the bedroom door.

The sweet words and kind gestures hadn’t made an impact on Ali but the keeper was desperate to try and help her feel something, anything, besides sadness. Ashlyn walked to the foot of the bed and paused, making her final decision in the two seconds that she stood there looking at the confused look on Ali’s face. The keeper took three steps towards the head of the bed, bent her knees and picked up her wife in one swift move. Her arms were below Ali’s butt and when she stood up her face was buried in Ali’s chest.

“Oh!” the brunette exclaimed. She spread her legs out and wrapped them around Ashlyn’s waist, letting her body settle in on top of her keeper’s hips. “Ash...” she exhaled as she gazed down into her favorite hazel eyes.

“Let me make you feel better” the blonde’s voice was urgent and filled with emotion as she pulled her head back so she could look up and meet Ali’s gaze. “I know it might not fix anything, but...”

Before she could finish her sentence, Ali crashed their lips together in a hungry, desperate kiss. She had been surprised and a little annoyed by her wife’s abrupt appearance. But once she was in Ashlyn’s powerful arms, once she felt the strength and stability there, she knew exactly what she wanted. She knew what she needed. 

“Yes, babe” she gasped out while she tried to catch her breath after the long, sloppy kiss. “Yes, make me feel you...make me feel small and safe in your arms...make me yours...” Ali pleaded as they locked eyes.

Ashlyn was shocked by her wife’s eager response. She had been hopeful that Ali would let her make love to her and show her how much she loved her. But she hadn’t expected the passionate plea that was heartbreaking and tantalizing at the same time. They kissed again for a long few minutes while Ashlyn moved her hands all over her wife’s back and ass and thighs. Her movements weren’t fast and they weren’t slow, they were deliberate and purposeful. Ali needed her to be strong for her, to share her strength with her and that’s exactly what she would do. The keeper turned them around towards the bed and carefully set the brunette down on it, immediately missing the tight squeeze of her legs around her waist. Ashlyn stood up, right in front of her wife and Ali squeezed her calves together on either side of her keeper’s knees, missing the contact too. Once the blonde was completely naked she bent over and gave Ali a slow, deep kiss, loving the way the brunette’s hands moved to her sides and tried to pull her closer. But Ashlyn resisted. Instead, she reached for the waistband of her wife’s shorts and, when Ali lifted her hips for her, pulled them down with her panties, all the way off her gorgeous legs and to the floor. When they broke for air this time, Ali lifted her t-shirt over her head and removed her bra, never taking her eyes off of her gorgeous keeper. 

Ashlyn climbed on top of her wife, moving them both into the center of the bed, still laying sideways across it. Their lips found each other again, moving together as their tongues methodically explored every inch of their mouths. This wasn’t a race, despite the desperation in the brunette’s initial kiss. Ashlyn wanted to tend to her wife’s body and hoped that her ministrations would help revitalize her vulnerable heart and soul. They were skin to skin and touching in as many places as possible. The keeper let her whole body weight press down on Ali, wanting her to feel just how much she was there with her, however she needed her, for as long as she needed her. She moved her hands up and cupped Ali’s breasts, making room between their chests for a few seconds and enjoying the moan that escaped her wife’s mouth. Ashlyn’s lips worked over her jaw towards her ear, nibbling and sucking along the way while the brunette’s hands dug into her lower back and shoulder blade to hold her in place. The blonde spent a few minutes licking the perimeter of Ali’s ear, making her shiver underneath her and moan again. She dragged her lips down to her earlobe and sucked it into her mouth, giving it a bite that was harder than it was soft.

“Oh...Ashlyn...” she gasped and writhed.

“I love you Ali. Forever” she mumbled against her neck as she nibbled her way down to her pulse point and sucked hard. 

“Forever...” the brunette repeated and clutched at her keeper’s ass with both hands as the passion pooled between her legs.

Ali hissed when she felt the sting on her neck and then moaned as she felt Ashlyn’s stiff nipples drag across her own. She closed her eyes and pressed her head back into the bed as her wife’s hands wandered all over her body, ghosting touches and pressing her fingertips into her muscles. It was such a cliché, but Ashlyn really did know just how to play her body like an instrument. As soon as Ali enjoyed one sexy sensation, her senses were filled with another completely different but equally satisfying one. The brunette was panting for breath as the flush travelled from her chest up her neck while her keeper’s hands kept up their glorious treatment.

When Ashlyn felt her wife’s legs tremble beneath her she knew it was time for more. They hadn’t had sex at the hotel for the 40th birthday bash because they were both so exhausted by the time they got up to their room after their all-nighter with Lady Gaga, that they simply passed out. Apparently, Ali’s body was very ready for a release, even if her mind might not be. The blonde shifted her body to her left, continuing to kiss her wife’s neck and shoulder while dragging her right hand all the way down to her thigh. Ali moaned again at the new sensation as well as the loss of contact and the comforting weight of her keeper on top of her. Ashlyn rolled the brunette over so she was lying on her left side and lifted her up so she was leaning on her left elbow. She slid her left arm underneath Ali, in the space created by her elbow support, and cupped her breast. The keeper spooned her from behind, bending and pushing Ali’s right leg up more towards her chest so there was room to work between her legs. 

“Jesus...so wet...” Ashlyn groaned as she delicately moved her fingers between her wife’s legs. She spread Ali’s pussy lips apart and felt a gush between her own legs as she got even more turned on herself. “Fuck...”

Ali turned her head and the blonde brought their lips together in a passionate kiss, both of them moaning into it, tongues dancing together. The brunette gasped when she felt her wife’s fingers pinch her nipple and then squeeze her breast, repeating the movements with an occasional tug and scratch with her short nails.

“Fuck, babe...” Ali was so far gone she could barely hold herself up on her elbow. She dropped her head down onto the bed, forehead first, and Ashlyn quickly moved her lips to the back of her neck. “Mmmmmmm...” the brunette moaned.

The keeper knew her wife was close and pushed two fingers into her hot center, loving the feel of the wet, silky walls all around her long fingers.

“Oh God” Ali gasped when she felt her wife start thrusting her fingers inside her, nice and deep and slow. “Yessss...”

“I love you baby...” Ashlyn grunted into the back of her wife’s neck before licking and sucking on the soft skin there.

Ali was using both arms to hold her upper body up, almost in an all-fours position except that her lower body was on its side with her hot keeper fucking her faster and harder with her strong fingers. Ashlyn gave her breast another squeeze and her nipple another pinch before pulling her arm back out from underneath her. The brunette dropped down against the bed with a moan, happy not to have to hold herself up anymore. She rolled her torso back into Ashlyn’s chest and reached up with her right hand to grab the sexy short hair at the back of her keeper’s neck.

“Unnnhhhh...oh fuck...unnnhhhh...” she groaned as the blonde kept pounding into her. “So...good...”

“God you’re sexy as hell...” the keeper mumbled against Ali’s lips and then kissed her hard.

They were both laying on their left sides now and Ashlyn pushed her left arm underneath her wife’s body, down by her hip, so she could reach her aching clit. It wasn’t that comfortable but the blonde knew she wouldn’t be there that long. Ali was ready to come.

“Oh shit, oh yes, oh God, oh...oh...” she let out a high-pitched moan as Ashlyn’s strong fingers pumped into her drenched pussy and rubbed her throbbing clit. There were a few seconds of labored breathing from both of them and then Ali shouted as her orgasm took over. “Ashlyn!!!! Yesssssss!!!!!!”

Her whole body shook powerfully as she came hard. Her right leg shot out, straight down, and she rolled onto her stomach, twitching and flailing her arms. Ashlyn continued to stroke her center slowly, thrusting gently, while she pulled her left hand out from underneath her wife and licked her fingers. She leaned over and pressed kisses into Ali’s back, making her shiver from the contact as they both tried to catch their breath. Ali moaned when she felt her wife’s hard nipples dragging across her bare back. She reached down and pulled Ashlyn’s right hand out of her and pulled it up and across her back, tugging her keeper’s whole body closer and practically on top of her back.

“I’m here baby, right here” she purred into Ali’s ear and then kissed the back of her neck and shoulder. She almost lost her mind when the brunette turned her head to the right and brought Ashlyn’s right hand to her lips, sucking and licking her own juices off of the long, strong fingers. “Fuck Al...”

The playful, sexy banter wasn’t there that night but that was ok. This felt different somehow. It was sex obviously, but it wasn’t really about the sex, or not just the sex. Ali needed Ashlyn’s strength, primarily physical that night, to help her feel less fragile. She needed her keeper’s big strong arms to help her feel safe and secure and loved and permanent. She needed her wife to be her anchor and keep her tethered to the big old house and their life and their world. Ali knew the feeling of being afraid and worried would pass, but until it did she needed her beautiful strong wife to keep her safe and protected. She needed Ashlyn to be her shelter until the storm passed. And that is just what the keeper had done.

“Thank you” she murmured into Ashlyn’s neck after they had faced each other and curled up into each other’s arms. “I’m sorry...I don’t know why...”

“Shhhh, it’s ok honey” Ashlyn soothed her and kissed her forehead. “Don’t be sorry about anything. I’m right here baby, I’ll do anything in the world for you. And I’ll always be right here with you, forever.”

“Forever” Ali repeated softly and nuzzled deeper into her wife’s neck with a contented sigh. “Forever.”


	37. September Sadness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters tonight...TGIF!

September 2025 was the warmest on record in Boston. Every September had some 80 degree days and some 60 degree days, that was just how it was in New England. But this year, it was at least 80 degrees almost every single day. Nobody really complained about it, but it felt weird. It felt like they were in summer school or something. All these gorgeous beach days kept happening and everyone was stuck in school or at work. The region, in general, was grumpy about it. The Red Sox weren’t going to make the playoffs, unless there was a minor miracle before the end of the month. The Patriots were just starting their new season and there was a lot of optimism surrounding the team for the first time in the three years since Tom Brady had retired, at age 45. Bill Belichick had retired the year before, having long said that he wasn’t going to be coaching into his 70s. The Patriots floundered for a couple of seasons as Josh McDaniels, the brilliant offensive coordinator and assistant coach for the past decade, tried to find a way to follow the enormous footsteps Belichick left behind. Replacing Brady had been almost as impossible a feat, but the second year QB who would be leading the team this season looked like he might, finally, be the real deal. The Celtics and the Bruins had both had more success over the past five years than the other pro teams in town, with the possible exception of the Boston Pride in the NWHL. They were still winning practically every game and championship, even without Hilary Knight leading them. 

That left the NE Revolution, the Boston Breakers, the Boston Beacons in the WNBA and the Boston Cannons in men’s lacrosse. All four of those teams had been struggling for years, except for the Breakers glorious championship years and the Beacons surprising, one-off championship back in 2023. The Cannons were still not very good, despite dedicated coaches, like Ryan Flanagan, doing everything possible to lift the team up. The rumor was that unless the team made the playoffs this year, which were in three weeks, the head coach was getting the axe. Ryan would be under strong consideration as his replacement. Ryan was a very good coach. He coached as he had played – strong, steady, tough, unrelenting and smart. There was hope within the organization that Flanagan might be just the right man for the job. The Breakers were always in the hunt for the playoffs, making the cut one year and then missing it the next. They had suffered through a few years of bad injury luck but always managed to remain competitive which told them all that they would do great things once they were able to get and stay healthy. The Beacons were poised to be the next great team in the WNBA. Kamala Pierce had only gotten better and better and had turned into a dynamic and passionate leader as well. They were going to make the playoffs this year, at the end of October, and maybe even become the Cinderella story of the post-season. The Revolution was a team on the rise as well. The building blocks that had been put in place through Ali’s draft day deal last year were proving to be everything ownership had hoped for. Tanner had convinced even the harshest local skeptics that he needed to be in the starting line-up and would invariably make the smart play that would either seal the win in the waning minutes of the game or start the game-winning final push with a perfect through ball to set up one of the young strikers up top. The Revs were going to make the playoffs next month too, but probably not get very far. But they were close to becoming a really good team for a long time to come with their group of young talent.

The Kriegers still attended all of the Breakers home games, assembling in the Knight-Harris suite at the still-gorgeous stadium. K-H had finally opted to get the biggest suite available on the mid-level seating area in the stadium. There were a couple suites that were even bigger but they were way up high and Ali was adamant about staying closer to the pitch. The suite they occupied now was still twice as big as the one they had started with years ago, and it was always full of Kriegers and Crosses and Flanagans and Dwyers. And now that Tanner played for the Revs they went to those home games too. It was hectic but the soccer-loving family wasn’t about to miss a game with one of their own on the pitch. Ken and Vicki and Koty and Brianna were at every Revs home game and Ali did her best to get there too. Sometimes she would bring her whole family but sometimes, on the weeknight games, it would just be herself. Sometimes Ashlyn went as the family representative if Ali had to stay home with the kids or had a schedule conflict. Most of the games were Saturday afternoon so it was easy to just bring the whole family. Of course, now that Drew and Josie were playing soccer of their own, their Saturdays had gotten a whole lot busier.

September was a busy month for Ashlyn. She was still doing her Breakers Ambassador work and loving that. And she went to all of the Breakers home games as usual. But September 10th was World Suicide Prevention Day and the Mental Health Initiative was busier than usual getting their message out and trying to reach people who needed help. May was Mental Health Awareness month in the United States and that was another very busy month at the MHI. The other time of the year that was critical for them was the Thanksgiving and Christmas holiday season. Ashlyn was very involved in everything the MHI was doing. Just because she worked from home a lot didn’t mean she wasn’t working. She was a vital member of the team and she did whatever Helen Siegfriedt asked her to do. Sometimes she made phone calls, sometimes she shot personalized videos, sometimes she went to lunch with potential investors and people Helen was grooming as future board members. Sometimes she attended strategy sessions and brought her energy to the meetings that took place every day in the downtown Boston office building. She still did all of the Struggler videos that the company put out. These were scheduled in advance because they usually involved a famous or semi-famous person being interviewed. They tried to get the interviewee to come to the MHI in Boston whenever possible. Helen believed seeing the space and being inside the building and the organization was very impactful and made it much easier to get whomever they were working with to invest more time, and maybe some money, in the MHI. Sometimes Ashlyn had to travel to the celebrity to get the interview, often to New York City because almost everybody was willing to go to the big apple. 

Knight-Harris was busier than ever. America had officially begun to embrace women’s sports which meant the smaller leagues were growing and the bigger leagues were getting bigger and better. The NWHL had officially merged with the other small professional women’s hockey league and gotten twice as big. They kept the NWHL name and never looked back. Professional women’s hockey players and golfers were the two biggest growth areas for K-H over the past two years. Women’s tennis players were next on the list, followed by Men’s hockey and basketball. If everything stayed as productive as it was, K-H was going to be turning a sizable profit for the first time ever. That meant Ali and Ashlyn could start to collect their salaries. Up to this point neither of them had done that yet. Well, Ali did collect a salary but it was no more than what an intern would make. The Kriegers had been living off of Ashlyn’s endorsement money, which was significant, her work for the NWSL and Lifetime TV, her other broadcasting work – this year it had been the EUROs, and her small Breakers Ambassador salary. It wasn’t ideal and probably wasn’t sustainable forever, but that depended on the keeper’s endorsements and broadcast work. That was where the money was. The plan was for Ali to start collecting her real, six-digit salary in January of 2026. If things continued to go well, then Ashlyn would start collecting hers in January of 2027. They had no reason to think there would be a problem with the plan. K-H had grown steadily each year by capitalizing on smart business plans, efficient operating budgets, hard-working employees, and loyal clients. They had survived the Kamala Pierce scandal and even grown because of it. Ali had built an extremely strong base for the company, a foundation that she felt could withstand almost anything. The company was expecting another influx of business and activity surrounding the NWSL Championship week which was being held in Boston this year. The playoff games were going to be played in early October and the Championship Week would be held the following week, with the Championship game on Saturday, October 25th. 

Anytime a major sporting event or championship series was held in Boston, K-H felt the new business almost immediately. Ali had everybody come back to the area to help make sure whatever the event was went well. October would be busy with both the NWSL championship week in town as well as, hopefully, the first two rounds of WNBA playoffs. If the Beacons could make the finals then that would be even better and K-H would be poised to take advantage of the extra visibility. It was a great time to bring prospective clients into their world and show them everything that K-H was about. Much as Helen Siegfriedt felt about bringing people to the MHI offices, Ali thought it was vital to get as many visiting athletes into the K-H office as well. The brunette was incredibly proud of the company they had built and looked forward to sharing it with new clients as often as possible. She had a good team working with her and she knew it. Marcy Hopkins had taken Ali’s advice last year and begun to work on getting her MBA. She was doing it part-time while continuing to work at K-H and Ali made sure she had the time she needed to get it done. Marcy had her own assistant now and Ali tried to spend more time with the young woman when Marcy was out of the office. It was out of kindness as well as practicality. When Marcy was out of the office, Ali had to be there. At least until the new assistant could be trusted enough to help Jared run the day to day business. Whitney was coming back from her 6-month maternity leave at the end of September and the brunette also wanted to make that as seamless a transition for the lawyer as possible. 

Both Ali and Ashlyn could work all day every day if they wanted or needed to. Josie went to preschool every morning in Gloucester now and needed to be picked up at 1:30pm. Drew was in Elementary school in Gloucester and needed to be picked up at 2:30pm. The twins went to daycare in Lynnfield every day, unless Ashlyn decided to keep them home with her for the day. It could get hectic pretty quickly unless Ali and Ashlyn followed a schedule and communicated a lot. Typically, Ali left the house at 8:15 in the morning with all four kids. She dropped Drew off first, then Josie and then drove to Lynnfield and brought the twins to daycare before heading into the office in Cambridge herself. After everybody left, Ashlyn would get herself ready for the day and then go out to the garage to work or, occasionally, go into the Boston MHI office. She had to be home to pick up Josie at 1:30pm so the Boston trip wasn’t always productive. If both moms had to be in the city, or anywhere else, for work and couldn’t be there to pick up Josie or Drew, they called in reinforcements. That meant Vicki, unless Deb happened to be visiting. Ali kept the schedule for the whole family and she did a great job orchestrating everything. Once Ashlyn had trained herself to get all of her appointments and schedule requests to the brunette, it was much easier for Ali to arrange for reinforcements. Vicki was flexible, thank God, but she had her own life and work and needed to be able to plan as well. And, after soccer season, Sydney could be counted on to pick up the twins from daycare in a pinch too. Once Marcy was finished with her MBA – the two-year program would end in early 2027, Ali’s schedule would become more flexible again as well and she could be home earlier in the afternoons whenever she wanted or needed to. She could also go out to the garage and work from there if necessary as well. They both had busy schedules but were lucky enough to have some flexibility too. They knew not all parents were so lucky and they appreciated their life all the more.

Life in the big old house slowly settled down that hot and sticky September. Josie adjusted to preschool better than anyone thought she would and Drew took to first grade like he had been there and done it before. Both moms were proud as hell but sad at the same time. After two mornings of dropping off Josie to preschool, Ashlyn had come with her the first day, Ali was heartbroken. 

“What’s the matter with you?” Sydney asked late Wednesday morning when she finally had a chance to call her best friend back.

“God, Syd, I don’t know” Ali whined, practically in tears. “I’m dying...” her voice wavered and the coach could hear the tears about to fall.

“About Josie?” she asked carefully.

“Yeah” the brunette choked out and sniffled.

“Awww boo, I’m sorry it’s so hard right now” Sydney soothed, wishing she could give her best friend a big hug right at that moment. “My poor Alibaba...”

“Why is this so hard? I mean, it was hard with Drew but not this hard? What the fuck is wrong with me?” she sniffled again, trying to keep her tears in check.

“Seriously? You haven’t figured this one out yet?” Sydney was surprised.

“No, have you?” Ali sounded a little indignant, but mostly just sad.

“Umm, I don’t know for sure or anything...”

“Syd, please, just spit it out...I’m desperate.”

“Ok, but if it sounds crazy then maybe that’s all it is...just crazy” she paused and took a breath. “I think you’re just extra protective of her because...you know...she almost died and you almost died...”

“No, really?” Ali scrunched her face up as she wrestled with the idea. “That’s what you think?”

“Yeah. I mean, it makes total sense and there’s nothing wrong with it or anything.”

“But we both try so hard not to be overprotective with her. Ashlyn has a harder time than I do, I’m always reminding her to let Josie try something herself first before...”

“Al, this is different. Yes, you guys are really good about letting her be a kid” she paused again. “The cutest, littlest bean of a kid there ever was” she giggled and Ali couldn’t help but join her. “But this isn’t that. This is, I don’t know, deeper...almost like it’s in your subconscious and you can’t fight it no matter how hard you try.”

“What do you mean?”

“You two went through something together and it nearly killed you both. Even though you don’t talk about it with her it still happened. You still have that shared experience with her. And some day when she’s older maybe she’ll have some sort of memory of it or maybe she’ll feel something about it or about you that she can’t understand. I don’t know, this sound stupid now that I’m saying it all out loud.”

“No Syd, that does make sense. It’s like my brain knows she’s ok and helps me make sure we let her do her own thing. But my heart or something deeper inside me is afraid to let her go.”

“That’s exactly what I meant but I don’t know how you got that out of what I said” the coach chuckled. “What do you think?”

“I think it makes sense. And I think my heart hurts and I want it to stop hurting” Ali sighed heavily.

“And it will boo. It just takes time. Maybe it’ll take longer than it did with Drew. Who knows? But you just have to be patient and try to find a tiny bit of improvement every day. Just take it one step at a time. One drop-off at a time. One day at a time...”

“That’s it!” Ali interrupted excitedly. “Maybe I just need to pick her up!”

“Oh well, yeah” Sydney frowned into the phone. “You haven’t done that yet?”

“No, it’s only been two drop-offs Syd.”

“I just figured you would have picked her up if you were so sad about dropping her off. You know the rule, drop-off sucks but pick-up is the best. They destroy your heart in the morning at drop-off and then, after making you suffer all damned day, they put it back together for you in the afternoon when they run into your arms at pick-up time.”

The solution was so simple Ali couldn’t believe she hadn’t thought of it sooner. She called her wife and told her she was changing their schedule that afternoon. Ashlyn readily agreed to pick up the twins from daycare so Ali could leave work early and be in Gloucester to pick up Josie from her second day of preschool.

“Mommy!” Josie yelled as she ran towards Ali outside the preschool building. The rest of her class was all around her shouting similar greetings to their moms or dads. “Mommy!”

Ali felt like her heart was just going to explode right there on the spot. She got on her knees and opened her arms to welcome her beloved baby girl into a hug.

“Hi little one” she said softly as she held her tightly and kissed her cheek. It took a full minute for her to get her shit together so she didn’t burst into tears in front of all the other parents. It wasn’t until she felt Josie squirm in her arms that she found the strength to let her little girl go. “How was your day sweetheart?”

Every day that went by shifted the balance from sad to proud even more, so that, by the end of the month, they were just proud and happy parents. The whole month was emotional for both women, for different reasons. Ali was still freaked out by the demise of Erica’s marriage that they all had thought was rock solid. She knew her relationship with Ashlyn was different and that it was truly on the sturdiest of foundations. But the idea that your whole world, your whole heart and soul, could be so utterly destroyed and turned upside down was unsettling to say the least. And Ashlyn, who was normally immune to the numbers of aging, was freaking out about turning 40. For some reason, 40 was making her head spin and she felt like a hypocrite for talking all those years about how age was just a number and you were only as old as you believed. She was hoping to have it figured out and conquered by the time she actually turned 40 in October, but, so far, she hadn’t made much headway. 

“I think we just have to feel what we’re feeling Ash” the brunette suggested softly one night as they lay on the couch together after putting the kids to bed. They had tried to watch a couple episodes of one of their Netflix shows but had gotten derailed after only a few minutes. They were both out of sorts and had been for the first two weeks of the month and they knew it. “I don’t think there’s anything to do about it...I mean, I don’t think there’s anything wrong. It just has to pass. That’s how it feels for me anyway” she shrugged.

“That’s what Mattie said too” Ashlyn sighed and rubbed her face with both hands. “I get it, but it’s hard. I hate feeling this way. I just want to feel normal again.”

“I’m sorry honey” Ali leaned over from her spot next to her wife and kissed her cheek and then rested her head on Ashlyn’s shoulder. She intertwined the fingers of one hand and sighed. “I wish I could do something to make you feel better.”

“Me too baby. Me too. I mean, to make you feel better, not just me” she clarified needlessly. Ali knew what she meant. 

“Let’s just try and keep things simple and do the best we can” the brunette offered. “Not overextend this month...”

“Yeah, next month is going to be busy as hell so let’s take it easy while we can and maybe that’s all we’ll need. Just some down time.”

Down time was wishful thinking but it was a good idea. The Breakers had three home games in September, one of which was a Wednesday night clash with the Portland Thorns – still a big rivalry game all these years later. Josie and Drew had three soccer games of their own on Saturdays and Drew had practice every Wednesday evening. Tanner’s NE Revolution had two home games as well. They had Cassius Dwyer’s 8th birthday party in addition to two other birthday parties for classmates of Drew’s. And Kyle had a short film in the New York film festival for the second year in a row and Ali had promised him she would be there for his opening night again, just as she had been last year. She flew down, stayed the night with her brother and Nathan and then flew home the next afternoon. Short and sweet. The whole thing seemed daunting when they looked at it all on the calendar but then, when they really thought about it, it was mostly all things they loved to do. Go to soccer games and birthday parties. Spend time with their family and friends. Try not to overthink anything. Just keep it simple and don’t do anything extra that month and it would all be ok. Wishful thinking indeed. 

They had successfully made it through most of the month without any major hiccups. The more time they spent together doing the little things, like reading with Drew before dinner or helping Josie with her letters and numbers after school or just snuggling on the couch with the twins after their afternoon naps, the better Ali felt. Those simple things were like the spackle that you applied to fill the cracks in a wall before you painted it. They smoothed things out and evened the rough surfaces inside their bruised hearts. The brunette could almost feel the most vital organ repairing itself with every day that passed. Ashlyn was feeling better too, but not quite to the same degree that her wife was. The keeper’s repair work was a little slower and maybe a bit more complicated. But she had made progress and hoped that trend would continue. The best answer so far had come from Niki Cross, whom she had taken to the Wednesday night Breakers game.

“I don’t know if it’s because I already turned 40 back in May and I’ve had four months to deal with it or what” she started as she handed her friend another beer before the start of the second half. “But you’ll get there too Ash. I know you will. You’re in a funk right now but it won’t last. You have too much life to live to let your stupid age bog you down.” They lifted their plastic cups and toasted. “Just try and remember that if you weren’t 40 you wouldn’t have any of the cool things that make your life so awesome now.”

Somehow that was the answer the keeper had been looking for. That combination of words made sense to her and helped her find her perspective again. It had put her back on the right path and now Ashlyn felt like she could move forward again towards getting all the way out of her funk. Age was just a number. And if her number had to be 40...if that’s what it needed to be to get her the family she loved more than life itself, then that’s what it had to be. Fuck 40 and the panic it had caused the keeper. 

The last week of September brought sad news, putting a dent into all the work both Ashlyn and Ali had done to get themselves right again. Mrs. Riley, Grandma Lilian’s friend and the woman who had cleaned the big old house for both Lilian and Ashlyn for years, died in her sleep of a heart attack. She was 75 years old and had been in pretty good health up to that point. There had been no reason to think she wouldn’t live a much longer life as her mother, Mrs. Cummings who lived to be 88 years old, had done before her. It had been a year and 9 months since Mrs. Riley, or ‘Missus’ as the kids called her, stopped coming to the big old house every Monday and Thursday morning. Ashlyn, true to her word, had picked the old woman up and driven her to the house for tea several times since then. She wanted to do it every other week and she did for the first little bit. But then life had gotten busy, as it always seemed to do, and the visits turned into once a month instead. The keeper would pick up Drew from school and then pick up Mrs. Riley and they would sit at the small table in the kitchen and have tea. Drew sat with them and had his snack, answering the old woman’s questions about school and whatever else she came up with. She was still sharp as a tack and just as tough and rigid as ever. But they all knew she loved them as much as they loved her. That tough exterior was just the way she was. Mrs. Riley always brought them some of her homemade burnt sugar candy that they loved. If only Drew was there then he got an extra piece, which thrilled the little boy.

“I can’t believe I didn’t have her over this month” Ashlyn shook her head and wiped tears off of her face. “And last month was such a quick visit. She didn’t even get to see the little kids. Just Drew and he was a brat...”

“Shhhhh...” Ali wrapped her up in a hug and let her sob out her grief and regret as they sat on the family room couch together. “You were great with her and she loved all of her visits here Ash. She knew you had a busy summer with the Germany trip. She knew. She understood” the brunette kissed her wife’s head and squeezed her some more. “She knew you loved her honey. Please don’t doubt that, not for a second.” 

The keeper had gotten the phone call from Mrs. Riley’s daughter Jean late in the afternoon and had managed to hold it together in front of Drew and Josie. But as soon as she told her wife, she had lost it.

“Why is Mama crying?” Josie asked as she stood next to the couch. 

Ali and the twins had only been home for about thirty minutes. The brunette hadn’t even gotten upstairs to change her clothes yet.

“Oh little one” Ali smiled sadly at her and reached out to hold her small hand. “She’s very very sad.”

“Why?”

“We’ll talk about it in a little bit ok sweetheart? We’ll have a family talk with everybody after dinner. But Mama’s ok and I’m ok and we’re all ok, so you don’t have to worry about anything baby girl, alright?”

“Um-kay” she replied slowly and stood there watching her strong mother cry into her other strong mother’s shoulder. 

“Ash” Ali whispered into her wife’s ear, not sure what to do next. 

She didn’t want to interrupt Ashlyn but she also didn’t want to freak Josie out. They wanted their children to understand sadness and grief and tears but it was a fine line of just how much to show them and at what age. Persey walked over and sat on the floor next to Ashlyn and rested her chin on her knees, her eyes looking anxiously from Ali to Josie and back again.

“Jose why don’t you go in the other room with your brothers and sister. I’ll be in in a few minutes” Ali nodded her head and smiled as she squeezed her daughter’s hand. “Go on now” she patted her bum when the little girl had turned around and started to walk slowly towards the kitchen and mudroom beyond.

It took the keeper a long few minutes to pull herself back together, never leaving Ali’s strong arms until her breath had steadied and her tears had stopped. They fumbled their way through dinner, Josie eying the blonde the whole time they sat at the nook table, and then sat the kids down in the front living room to talk to them about ‘Missus’. Of course they were too young to really understand but both moms wanted to be honest with them, hopefully without scarring them for life. Mrs. Riley was the closest person that had passed away and Ali and Ashlyn were flying blind. Ali had taken a few minutes to call her mom and ask advice while she went upstairs to change her clothes before dinner. And that’s what they went with - the basic, ‘Missus’ died and is in heaven now and we won’t get to see her anymore until one day, a long long long long time away when we’re old like she was, we go to heaven too, speech. The twins were oblivious but Drew and Josie both seemed upset. It took them most of the rest of the evening to find the words to ask the questions they had and Ali patiently answered them. Ashlyn wanted to help but they had agreed that her breaking down again would probably only upset the kids that night, so Ali took the lead. They decided that Drew was old enough to go with them to the wake and the funeral. If they were going to try and explain death to him he ought to get the full experience. A lot of people thought that going to the wake or the funeral was therapeutic, especially for little kids who were just learning. Something about the ritual of paying your respects and going to church soothed the mourners, young and old.

“I’m really sorry honey” Ali hugged her wife from behind as she finished her nightly routine at the bathroom sink. She pressed a kiss into her shoulder blade. “Are you doing ok?”

“Yeah, I’m ok” the keeper gave her brunette a soft smile as they looked at each other in the mirror. “He had a lot of questions and I didn’t want to rush it. I hope we didn’t make a mistake bringing him to the funeral this morning.”

“Josie had a lot of questions too and she didn’t go to the wake or funeral so I don’t think that’s the problem” Ali replied and kissed the back of Ashlyn’s neck. “I only got in here a few minutes ago too.”

“I don’t even remember anybody explaining death to me...but somebody must have, right?”

“I’m sure Gram did, but I don’t remember it either” Ali shrugged. “Maybe if you’re little enough it just goes away until you’re old enough to really understand?” she asked rhetorically and tugged her wife towards the door. “Are you done in here?”

“Yeah” Ashlyn smiled softly again and followed the brunette into the bedroom. “I’m exhausted. Totally wiped out.”

“It’s been a tough day babe. Let’s just go to sleep and see what tomorrow brings” Ali pulled down the covers on Ashlyn’s side of the bed and helped her get in. She kissed her keeper’s forehead and pulled the covers up, tucking her in. Ali turned to walk around the foot of the bed but the blonde wouldn’t let go of her hand. “Hey” she chuckled. “C’mon, I want to go to bed too.”

“Come this way” Ashlyn pulled her wife back towards her with a tiny grin on her face. “I don’t want to let you go.”

These moments were the ones where Ali swore her heart grew even more full of love for her sweet wife. She could actually feel the pang of the muscle in her chest as it stretched and expanded. She climbed onto the edge of the bed and over her keeper to get to her own side of the bed, holding Ashlyn’s hand the whole time.

“I love you Ashlyn” she kissed her wife’s hand once she had gotten herself under the covers and curled into the blonde’s side. “Will you let me know if you need anything? Please? I’m here for you babe.”

“I know you are Al” Ashlyn smiled bashfully. “And I appreciate it, I really do. But there’s nothing to do” she shrugged. “Mrs. Riley’s gone. Another link to Grandma Lilian, gone. I don’t know who’s left?”

“Well I do” Ali frowned at her wife, surprised at her words. “Your mother, for starters. And you” she kissed her hand again, the hand that apparently was just like her grandmother’s. “And our children...two of whom are named after her...” her voice was soft and soothing and it seemed to relax the keeper. “So yeah, maybe the people she knew when she was alive aren’t around anymore, but that’s life. That’s how it’s supposed to be sweetheart. But I think the most important links to Grandma Lilian are right here under this roof. Under her roof. And that’s how it’s supposed to be too.”

“And we’ll make sure the kids know about her...” Ashlyn’s voice was sleepy and she was fighting to keep her eyes open. 

“Always, honey. And Gram too” Ali whispered.

The very next Sunday, Ashlyn brought her wife and children to the cemetery in Gloucester to visit Grandma Lilian’s grave. It was a trip much like the one she had made to Gram’s grave down in Florida several years earlier. She just wanted her children to know about the woman and to see her final resting place so that someday they might understand it all better. Someday they might understand some of the wonderful things Grandma Lilian was. Ashlyn wanted them to feel comfortable enough, when they were older, to go and visit the cemetery anytime they wanted or needed to. They took their time and talked about Grandma Lilian’s two boys, without talking about how young they were when they died – no need to freak the kids out. Dodge and Lily both seemed to understand that their names came from Grandma Lilian, getting reinforcement when they actually saw the words engraved into the headstones there. It was a painful and poignant visit and both Ashlyn and Ali were glad they had done it. They would keep on doing it too. The moms wanted to make sure to teach the links to Grandma Lilian about their ancestor. They knew it was too early for the twins to retain much of it but there was no reason not to start now. So they did. 

When it was time to go, Ashlyn hung back for a couple of minutes while Ali ushered the kids towards the minivan.

“Well, that was them. My family, your family” she spoke quietly to Grandma Lilian’s headstone, resting her hand on the cool granite hoping, vainly, to feel some tactile connection. “I promise I’ll make sure they know what an honor it is to come from your family, from you. They’ll make you proud, Grandma, I swear it.” She got choked up and took a minute to regain her composure. “I miss you” she sniffled. “And I love you.”


	38. Best Birthday Ever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry I missed last night's update. My plans changed at the last minute. So this is Saturday's chapter and I'll post another chapter for Sunday in a few minutes.

The malaise of September didn’t linger very long into October, at least not as far as Josie starting preschool was concerned. The little girl was as smart as a whip and took to school like she’d been going for years. She loved it. It was like watching a flower blossom right in front of your eyes. Her face lit up anytime anybody asked her about school and then she spent ten minutes talking animatedly about it and everything she was learning and all the new kids she was meeting. It was such a relief for both Ashlyn and Ali and the brunette’s profound sadness at her baby girl taking such a big step in her young life vanished practically overnight. It had been like a series of dominoes for the moms. Once Ali wasn’t so upset about Josie, she was able to better process the demise of Erica and Tom’s marriage. And once the brunette was feeling more optimistic about things, Ashlyn absorbed some of that sunshine and light and found her own spirits being lifted. She still wasn’t psyched about turning 40 later that month, but the idea got a little easier for her to accept. She’d gotten as used to it as she could and would just do her best to enjoy the day for what it was. Some days she was much better about it than others. Ali just hoped she would be having one of her good days on her actual birthday. 

Ali Krieger was sick and fucking tired of the NWSL playoffs and Championship week messing up her wife’s birthday every single year. It had been more years than she could even count anymore and she was starting to lose her patience with the situation. Which was ironic because she was always the one reassuring Ashlyn that they wouldn’t worry about celebrating things on actual dates until the keeper was finished with her soccer career and obligations. Ha. Little did the brunette know that her talented wife would keep getting hired to work on the broadcast team for the playoffs and Championship week games, year after year after year. The joke sure was on Ali. This year, for example, Ashlyn’s birthday was on Sunday, 10-19. The first game of Championship week, the runners up game, was on Saturday, 10-18 and then the Championship game itself was at the other end of the insanely busy week – hosted by Boston this year, on Saturday, 10-25. The weekend before Ashlyn’s birthday, the keeper would be in North Carolina for the playoff game on Saturday, 10-11. The NWSL had hijacked three fucking weekends that month, and the weekend afterwards was Halloween and they had plans with the kids and the four families that weekend. Normally Ali would have just sucked it up and made something work during the week instead of on a weekend. But this was a big deal. It was Ashlyn’s 40th and the blonde had been struggling with it for over a month now. Plus, Ali herself was going to be extremely busy getting ready for and then participating in and hosting Championship Week in Boston. It was just awful timing.

Instead, what she did was help Ashlyn arrange to spend the weekend in North Carolina with Meg and some of her old UNC friends and teammates. It was the long, Columbus Day weekend and the keeper flew down Friday afternoon for the production meeting the night before the game. Meg had her own soccer game Saturday morning and Ashlyn surprised her by attending it, hopping the one-hour direct flight from Durham, NC to Washington DC and then bringing Meg back to NC with her in time for the playoff game at 4:00pm. The rest of the broadcast team teased Ashlyn about her busy morning but the blonde just grinned and joked about getting a head start on scouting some middle schoolers. Mike Harris and his girlfriend Lydia made the 9-hour drive up to NC from Satellite Beach, arriving just in time for the playoff game to start Saturday afternoon. Meg had never met Lydia and hadn’t even spent that much time with Mike over the years. She remembered him fondly from Ashlyn’s wedding and the couple of times she and Mike had been at the big old house at the same time since then. And Ashlyn loved being able to show anybody around her beloved alma mater. The weekend visit was a wonderful success and the keeper had a really fun time. She was thankful that Meg and Lydia got along ok, they were both quiet and took their time with each other but it had been good. And as hard as it was to pull her away from her wife and family up in Gloucester, Ashlyn always found a way to enjoy wherever she was while she was travelling. But this weekend had been tremendous. Some of her very favorite people in one of her very favorite places doing one of her very favorite things. It was a wonderful birthday present that she wouldn’t have been able to experience without Ali’s imagination, permission and assistance. It was three nights and four days away from home and that was a big ask those days. But the brunette, as usual, had thought of everything and had the bases covered. 

“See, this is exactly what I’m always trying to tell you” Ashlyn smiled broadly as she realized she had a perfect, timely example she could give her wife. “All of this” she motioned to Ali’s laptop with all the emails between she and Hannah and Lydia planning the trip, open on the bed in front of them, and then to the brunette’s phone with the flight information in her hand. “You did all of this for me, for my birthday and it means so much to me Al. This right here is what you do, all the time.”

The brunette smiled but scrunched her face up in confusion, unsure what her lovely wife was trying to get at. 

“Ummm, you’re welcome?” she shrugged her shoulders and giggled.

“No” Ashlyn rolled her eyes and pulled her wife into her and hugged her as she slid down across the blonde’s lap. “You always say how you’re bad at the grand gestures...your words, not mine, by the way” she clarified with a quirked eyebrow.

“Ashlyn” she giggled and got more comfortable with her head in her keeper’s lap, “you arranged for a secret picnic lunch to be brought to us at the park in Dortmund...” she reminded playfully. “I have no chance, ever, of keeping up with you when it comes to the big romantic stuff like that. You just have a gift for that” she smiled widely. “Lucky me.”

“Ok, well you might be right about some of that, but it doesn’t matter” she shook her head, trying not to get sidetracked. “The point is this stuff is your grand gesture baby.” The blonde pointed at the trip information again and grinned. “These plans that you make for me all the time...these make me feel like I think that picnic made you feel.”

“Really?”

“I swear honey. The thought and time that you’ve put into making this weekend so special for me...” she paused as she got choked up.

“Aww, sweetheart” Ali reached up and pulled her wife’s head down so she could kiss her lips.

“You don’t see these things the way the rest of us do. I think it’s because it comes so naturally to you. Your mind just makes connections and sees possibilities before the rest of us can catch up. And then you make those possibilities into realities and I end up going on an incredible weekend that’s going to be so special...” her voice stuck in her throat again and tears threatened to fall down her cheeks.

“Are you getting your period babe?” Ali asked sweetly as she stroked her wife’s cheek. “You’re awfully weepy, not that I don’t love how sweet you’re being right now.”

“Yeah, I think I’ll get it tomorrow...” she sniffled. “For the record, I don’t think all of this emotion is just PMS” she shook her head. “I really mean it Al.”

“I know you do” the brunette smiled softly at her beautiful keeper again. “And maybe you’re right” she shrugged. “It’s definitely not as sexy or romantic as you and your penchant for grand gestures, but if organizing special trips for you makes you feel even a little bit of the way I feel when you sweep me off my feet like that, well, then I’ll take it.”

“It does, that’s what I’m trying to tell you and this is a perfect example. When you do stuff like this...that’s what sweeps me off of my feet. I love you honey, so fucking much” she bent over again and shared a longer and deeper kiss. 

“Just promise me you’ll make time for some birthday sex on your actual birthday...” the brunette mumbled against her wife’s lips.

“Such a deal. Who’s the lucky one again?” Ashlyn teased before kissing Ali’s delicious lips once more.

//

It was the second year in a row that North Carolina was hosting a playoff game. They were the defending league champions, having beaten Portland in the final last year. They had finished at the top of the table this season and won the Shield. After defeating the Boston Breakers 4-2 that afternoon in Cary, NC they were set to go up to Boston for Championship week and play Seattle for the Cup. Boston would face Vancouver in the runners up game next Saturday at the beginning of Championship week after the Greys lost their playoff game to Seattle. Three of the four playoff teams from 2024 were back again this year, NC, Seattle, and Vancouver. Boston had snuck into the fourth playoff spot this year and had played really well for the last six weeks of the season to get there. The Breakers were putting the pieces together for what looked like another excellent team that could win multiple championships. This year, 2025, had been gravy for the Breakers. Nobody expected them to make the playoffs but they played some of the best soccer down the stretch and beat out Portland for the fourth and final playoff spot. That had been especially sweet. 

The league had expanded to 18 teams in 2025 and Sky Blue FC had officially been absorbed by a new team in New York City last year. The goal was to get to 20 teams and then have an Eastern Division and a Western Division in the league. If everything went according to plan, the 19th and 20th teams would get added in 2027 or 2028. As of this year, 2025, these were the teams:

Boston Breakers  
Chicago Redstars  
NYC Power  
Washington Spirit  
NC Courage  
Orlando Pride  
Houston Dash  
FC Kansas City  
Portland Thorns  
Seattle Reign  
LA Strikers  
Minnesota Shieldmaidens  
Atlanta Fever  
Vancouver Greys

There were two new teams added in 2023, in San Jose, California and Toronto, Canada. Then, this year, they added a team in Denver, Colorado and one in Columbus, Ohio. That brought the total up to 18 teams.

San Jose Quicksilver  
Toronto Riverhawks  
Colorado Rush  
Columbus Chargers

The playoff picture had been dominated by the same six or seven teams over the past four or five years with one of the newer teams squeezing into the group every other year or so. But there was a wave of new players and new coaches and new excitement around the league and teams like Vancouver and Minnesota and Houston and Atlanta were starting to rise up the table year after year. The history of NWSL Championship winners looked like this:

2013 Portland Thorns (WNY Shield winners)  
2014 FC Kansas City (Seattle Shield winners)  
2015 FC Kansas City (Seattle Shield winners)  
2016 WNY Flash (Portland Shield winners)  
2017 Portland Thorns (also Shield winners)  
2018 Boston Breakers (Portland Shield winners)  
2019 Portland Thorns (Boston Shield winners)  
2020 Boston Breakers (also Shield winners)  
2021 Chicago Red Stars (LA Shield winners)  
2022 LA Strikers (also Shield winners)  
2023 Orlando Pride (also Shield winners)  
2024 NC Courage (Portland Shield winners)

The following Saturday, the Breakers defeated the Vancouver Greys in the Runners Up game. Nobody was surprised by the result even though the Greys had finished 3rd in the table to Boston’s 4th. Anybody who had followed the NWSL over recent years knew the Breakers weren’t going to lose a game like that on their home pitch. No way. Ashlyn had started to do more of the play by play work from the booth since the EUROs. She had called the NC v Boston playoff game and also called the Runners Up game from the booth. She really liked it, now that she was more comfortable with it. She loved being down on the pitch where all the excitement was more than anything though. It was easy for her to learn a bunch of things just from watching the benches or listening in to some of the conversations the coaches were having with the refs during the game. The keeper was happy to be back on the sideline for the Championship game at the end of Championship Week, watching Seattle finally win the cup they had been chasing so hard for 13 years. They had won the Shield back to back years in 2014 and 2015 only to lose the Championship game to FC Kansas City both years. This was their third attempt and they were finally victorious. None of the players or coaches from those early, successful years were still part of the organization but they all took to social media to help celebrate the Reign’s big win. Even the fans felt like the right team had won that year. NC had just won last year, they’d had a drink from the cup and most of the women’s soccer world was happy that Seattle was getting their turn.

Ali and Ashlyn had barely seen each other during Championship week, both being incredibly busy with their work. Lifetime TV had asked the keeper to get back to doing interviews with the players on the two teams that would compete in the big game so she spent mornings at the stadium or at one of the teams’ hotel. She made sure to be home in time to pick up Josie and Drew from school though. For one of the rare occasions in their professional lives, Ashlyn had to make sure she was home so Ali could work her magic at K-H. The brunette did many of the same things she had done the previous time the Championship week was in Boston. She networked like crazy and attended workshops and hosted dinners and cocktail hours and after dinner entertaining. She had a lot more help from other K-H agents and employees these days but there were also a lot more clients to take care of as well as new clients to woo and sign. The busy brunette didn’t get home before 9pm at all that week, and twice she was out until almost 1am entertaining potential clients and also trying to convince a few prominent agents to join K-H. 

Before Ashlyn had even gone to NC for the playoff game and long weekend with Meg and Mike and Lydia, Ali had arranged for her mom to come up and help her with the kids. Deb and Mike came up to Manchester, MA for four weeks, starting that long weekend and ending just after Halloween. They were staying in Miami this year for Thanksgiving so Deb was more than happy to be needed during the busy month of October. She didn’t often get to see the kids for Halloween so she was extra excited to be able to participate in that holiday too this year. 

Ashlyn’s 40th birthday was the Sunday after the Runners Up game, right at the beginning of their extremely busy week. Ali had taken the day off, as much as possible – she was answering her phone and replying to texts and emails, but she wasn’t going in to the office or to any events that day. Most of the conferences and networking events didn’t start until Monday anyway. Deb and Mike joined Ali and Ashlyn and brought the kids to Salem, MA for the morning. Halloween in Salem, MA was an enormous deal. It was the biggest thing that happened on the North Shore of Boston all year. Salem, MA was the original witch city and it had always done Halloween right. The streets were decorated. All of the witch museums had special events and extended hours. People dressed in costumes just to walk around the city and explore some of the more famous areas from the witch trials. It was a great city to hang around in and bar hop if that’s how you wanted to celebrate Halloween, which lots and lots of younger people liked to do. Ali and Sydney had loads of memories of spending Halloween in Salem, drinking and getting a little wild with friends. One of the biggest events the city of Salem held was the Grand Parade during the Haunted Happenings in the month-long build-up to Halloween. This year the parade was being held on October 19th. They usually picked a Saturday in the middle of the month for the parade because it drew huge crowds and the city planners wanted to make sure everybody remembered to come back for Halloween a couple of weeks later. This year it had rained on Saturday morning that weekend so they postponed the parade to Sunday instead.

The family made a last-minute decision to attend the parade and they had a great time. There were four grown-ups so there were lots of eyes and hands on the four kids which made everybody relax more. They all just walked around downtown Salem and enjoyed all the decorations and their own good company. They gathered with the thousands of other spectators in the square and watched the parade go by with spooky floats and costumed marchers and every kind of weird Halloween thing you could possibly imagine. The twins were just getting a handle on the holiday but Josie and Drew were already big fans of Halloween. They were the most excited, besides maybe Ashlyn, of all of them. 

“Did you see that witch JoJo?” the keeper asked her daughter excitedly as they waited in line on the common to get their faces painted.

“She was all red!” Josie replied, wide-eyed as she watched the witch walking by dressed in deep red robes and a matching hat.

“I know” Ashlyn grinned. “Do you think her cat is red too?” she lifted her eyebrows up to her hairline and laughed when Josie’s eyes got even bigger.

Up until that very moment, Josie had only ever seen witches dressed in black robes and hats with black cats so the red witch had rocked her world. After the parade was over and they had completed their tour of the huge common with all the Halloween activities, they drove home, had lunch and then the twins went up for their afternoon naps. 

“Alright mom, we’ll be back in time to put them to bed” Ali spoke as she walked through the kitchen on her way from the backstairs to the mudroom. “Please just don’t worry about the kitchen after dinner. I’ll take care of it when I get home. Are you sure you don’t want me to have Dad and Vicki come over and help with dinner?”

“No Alex, just go and treat your wife to a nice time” Deb smiled from her spot on the couch between Drew and Josie. She looked about as happy as any Grandma ever had. “We’ll be just fine.”

“Since you won’t tell me where we’re going I wasn’t sure what to wear” Ashlyn gave her wife a challenging smirk as she patted Ali’s butt and then stepped past her into the front living room.

“You look...perfect” Ali complimented as she took the sight of her keeper in.

Ashlyn wore perfectly faded jeans with a black, v-neck cashmere sweater. Her big, black doc marten boots and her gold shark necklace gave her outfit just a little bit of edge and made Ali’s heart skip a beat. The keeper had small, silver, skull-shaped earrings in and her make-up was just right. Deb watched her daughter practically drooling over her wife and chuckled softly, knowing the brunette would have an even bigger reaction once Ashlyn put her leather jacket on to complete the outfit.

“So listen you two” the blonde spoke directly to her two oldest children. “Mommy and I are going out but we’ll be back before bedtime. I expect you both to behave yourselves and be good for Grandma and Mike, alright?” she flashed them a serious look. Once they both nodded and smiled up at her she gave them each a kiss and moved out of the way so Ali could do the same.

“Remember, you’re the big kids so try and make sure Dodge and Lily are good too. You give them good examples of how to behave, ok?”

“Ok Mommy.”  
“Ah-huh, we will.”

Ashlyn slipped her leather jacket on and helped her wife into her coat, admiring her outfit as they walked towards the truck. Ali wore dark grey jeans, much tighter than Ashlyn’s, and short black boots with 3” heels. Her long-sleeved, red blouse had tiny black polka dots covering it and gathered at her waist, moving smoothly with her, every time she moved. Her shoulder-length dark hair was down and she had curled it into soft waves. She wore medium-sized, silver hoop earrings and the charm bracelet Ashlyn had given her after Drew was born. Her make-up was perfect, with darker than usual eyes and gorgeous red lipstick. She looked stunning.

They both had a busy next day, and all week really, so they had agreed to keep the birthday celebration small and simple. It was the only way Ashlyn had agreed to let her wife take her anywhere at all that afternoon or evening. When they pulled into the parking garage at the Museum of Science Ashlyn smiled, even though she didn’t know exactly what the brunette had planned.

“Ooooh, Drew’s gonna be pissed we came here without him” the keeper cocked her head and whistled.

“Yeah, well, you’re worth the hissyfit babe” Ali smiled at the blonde and patted her leg.

It didn’t take too long for Ashlyn to figure out what they were doing there. It was 2:45pm, which was an unusual time for a birthday date to start but she knew Ali had a plan.

“Are you seriously taking me to this 3-D shark movie for my birthday?!” she asked, unable to hide the excitement in her voice.

“Maybe” Ali replied coyly as they stood together in line, holding hands and smiling at each other.

“You really love me, don’t you?” Ashlyn teased and pulled her into a hug. “This is awesome baby, I love it” she pecked Ali’s lips and let her move out of the hug to buy the tickets.

After the movie was over Ali drove them to the Chinese restaurant near her old house in Stoneham that was still Ashlyn’s favorite. If they got Chinese take-out at home in Gloucester the keeper didn’t complain, but Ali knew she didn’t like it as much as the Mandarin in Reading. Ashlyn’s eyes went wide again when Ali took the exit off the highway and made the short drive to the restaurant.

“No way! This is the best birthday ever!”

“Dinner and a movie babe” Ali chuckled. “Dinner and a movie.”

It was a little bit more than dinner and a movie though. After they had stuffed their faces with way too much food Ali pulled an envelope out of her purse and slid it across the table towards her wife.

“What’s this? You already gave me my birthday cards” she leaned in closer across the table. “The nice one and the naughty one” she wagged her eyebrows after lowering her voice.

“Before you open it, I just want to tell you that I’m doing this for you Ash. It’s not up for debate. I’m including you in it as a courtesy so we can get it just the way you want it, but you don’t get to say no.”

Ashlyn swallowed and pulled out the tri-folded pieces of paper from the business sized envelope. She was almost more nervous than excited because if Ali had to give her a speech like that then that meant there was something in the envelope that Ashlyn was going to want to try to return or not accept. What the hell was going on? They had agreed not to do anything big for this birthday because the big 40th birthday bash had been expensive and awesome and it was way more than the keeper needed or expected. She also knew that her wife was going to get her something for her birthday because there was no way that she would let Ali’s birthday go without a gift if the positions were reversed.

“What did you do?” she met her beautiful brunette’s whiskey-colored eyes and unfolded the three pieces of paper. She saw love and adoration in her eyes with a little bit of anxiety too. Ashlyn winked teasingly at her wife and then looked down at the papers. “Holy fucking shit Ali!” she yelled out in shock.

The people at the two tables nearest them gave them sharp looks when they heard the outburst and the language.

“Sorry” Ali smiled sheepishly at both tables.

Ashlyn didn’t say anything else for the longest two minutes of the brunette’s life. She just read the information on the pages and looked at the pictures the whole time. She picked up her empty beer bottle and shook it before putting it back down and reaching for her water glass instead. It was almost 7:15pm and they had to get going and they both knew it.

“Ashlyn, say something” Ali’s voice carried the same anxiety her eyes had a few minutes earlier.

“Can we afford this?” the blonde leaned forward again and kept her voice low, lifting her eyes to meet her wife’s. She dropped the pages with the specs for a brand new, 2026 Jeep Rubicon Limited Edition, completely tricked out, on the table between them.

“Yes, we can” Ali smiled, relieved that she wasn’t fighting the gift. “We don’t have any payments” she shrugged. “Your Jeep is paid off and so is my truck, and...”

“We don’t pay for the Suburus” Ashlyn nodded and started to smile very slowly. 

“I thought we’d sell the truck” the brunette explained as she reached across the table to hold her wife’s hand as Ashlyn turned her attention back to the contents of the envelope. “We don’t want the driveway to start looking like a junkyard so we’ll have to get rid of one of the cars we already have.”

“But the truck is great for the dogs and for the dump and...”

“It’s also 11 years old and something’s gotta go.”

“Well, it’s dumb to have so many cars in the first place” Ashlyn grabbed the back of her neck self-consciously. “I never thought I’d ever in my whole life say those words” she whispered and dropped her eyes to the empty table in front of her.

Ali felt her heart pang as she watched the woman she loved so much struggle to align her current well-off life with her borderline-welfare childhood. The Kriegers weren’t rich but they were very comfortably upper middle class. Once Ali started collecting her salary in January they would be even better off. But they had big expenses to cover too. They certainly couldn’t be spending every penny that Ashlyn’s endorsements brought in. Knight-Harris was just starting to become truly profitable and that had taken almost nine full years. The Mental Health Initiative was barely breaking even but had gained more popularity and donations and acclaim every year since its inception in 2021. Ashlyn hadn’t started it to make money. Nothing could have been farther from her mind. But it needed to make money so it could function and grow. Someday the keeper would collect a small salary from the MHI as well, even though she was pretty sure she would donate it right back to the organization anyway. And The Academy had barely managed to make it through its inaugural summer a few months earlier that year. It was a long way from being a profitable business venture. But everybody who worked on it knew that it wouldn’t take long before it became recognized as one of the go-to, destination soccer camps in the country. It had everything it needed. Great location, excellent soccer program, big names and soccer legends to promote it and participate in it, and a powerful, humanitarian and philanthropic side mission to help the less fortunate kids too.

The girl from Satellite Beach had come a long way and somehow turned into the woman who helped create three separate businesses that all represented a part of her very heart and soul. There were days when she simply couldn’t believe the way her life had turned out. Today, right then at the restaurant with her beautiful brunette and her extravagant birthday present, was one of those days.

“Babe, if it’s truly going to upset you we don’t have to do it” Ali reached across the table and took her wife’s other hand, the one not nervously grabbing the back of her neck. “But I really want to do this for you honey. You’ve worked so hard for so long and you deserve to have something special, just for you. Honestly, the only reason this thing wasn’t parked in the driveway for you this morning with one of those enormous red bows on it is because I was afraid I’d screw it up and leave out something you really wanted in it, or order the wrong tires or running lights or...”

“I get it Al” the keeper squeezed her sweet wife’s hand and smiled softly at her, finally letting her other hand drop to her lap with a sigh. “And I appreciate it, I really do” her smile got bigger as she gazed into Ali’s whiskey-colored eyes. 

“Do you not want a Jeep with the kids?” Ali tilted her head, trying to understand the hesitation. “Is the big 3rd-row seating SUV-style Jeep not cool enough? Because we can get just the regular size, just for you, and I’ll use the minivan...”

Ashlyn chuckled and picked up the pages in front of her, looking over the specs the brunette had selected with a grin on her face. She took a couple of minutes and read through everything while Ali paid the bill.

“This is perfect” her dimple appeared as her grin grew even wider. “I’d probably change a couple of little things, but seriously, this is awesome” she nodded. 

“Yeah?” Ali questioned tentatively, still unsure where her wife’s head was at.

“Yeah. I love it. And I love you. And we need to get going so we can get home before the bewitching hour” she stood up and took Ali’s hand as they walked out of the restaurant together. “Here’s what I think we should do about our junkyard situation...”

They spent the 40-minute drive up to Gloucester discussing and finalizing their plans for their vehicles. The Suburu coupe was going away. Ashlyn hardly ever drove it and if she needed or wanted a fancy car for a special occasion she could just call Suburu and make the arrangements. They would keep Ali’s truck for all of its practical capabilities, as well as the Suburu minivan for all of the kids. Ashlyn’s new Jeep would replace her old Jeep which Ali fought hard against, explaining that she never intended for that to happen. Ashlyn’s plan was to drive the old Jeep back down to Florida and keep it there so they could use it when they visited. She had always kept it in good condition. The 2007 Jeep Wrangler, that was the first car she ever bought as soon as she could afford it after college, was just old. The keeper was sure Carol or Chris would let her keep it parked at one of their houses. Worst case scenario she could rent a storage unit for it. Or maybe she would pass it down to Johnny and Lizzy when they were old enough to drive it.

The only way Ashlyn would agree to accepting the new Jeep as her 40th birthday present was if Ali agreed to those car arrangements. The brunette considered the whole thing a big win and was beyond excited to give her sweet keeper something she knew she truly loved and probably would never have bought for herself. Yes, it was extravagant. But Ali had done all the math and they could afford a car payment, especially because it was the only one they had. They were both all smiles when they walked into the big old house that evening, just in time to help Deb and Mike with the bedtime routine. After talking with the babysitters and getting the rundown on how the kids had behaved for them, Ali finally led her wife up the backstairs for the end of her birthday celebration. It was later than they would have liked, but they enjoyed each other’s bodies anyway. Championship Week would be grueling for them both and they cherished every minute of their time together that night until Ali finally fell asleep in her keeper’s strong arms. Ashlyn gave herself an extra special present that night and didn’t wake her wife up to get dressed again. She held her girl close and savored the feel of her soft skin everywhere she touched. If one of the kids needed something that night Ashlyn would just deal with it then, naked as the day she was born. Too fucking bad.

“Happy Birthday to me” she whispered, kissed her wife’s head on her shoulder and smiled on her way to slumber. “Best birthday ever...”


	39. Halloween

Drew’s soccer team was doing well, much better than last year. The players knew each other and their coach better and actually looked a tiny bit like a team out on the pitch every Saturday morning. They were still just 6-year old boys so nothing very impressive was happening. But they had fun and Ali enjoyed coaching. The new assistant coach wasn’t as good as Sam had been, and Ali felt guilty that the team with Machado’s Pizzeria sponsored t-shirts didn’t have him as assistant coach anymore. But it wasn’t really her fault. She knew that but she still had regrets. Drew and Ethan were still as thick as thieves and Ethan didn’t seem to care that his father wasn’t helping coach the team this year. Things had been very civil between Ashlyn, Ali and Sam since the last week of August when he had spoken with both of them about his new girlfriend. He had been helpful and kind as always, but was careful to keep his distance. He had gone out of his way to sign up for a different volunteer task if he saw Ali or Ashlyn’s name already on the list, and the Kriegers had done the same thing. Drew and Ethan spent a lot of time at each other’s houses and the three parents shared a group text so they could make arrangements for pick ups and drop offs. It was all very civilized and friendly. Only Julie Donaldson seemed to have picked up on the change. She would often see Sam sitting in his car in the Krieger driveway waiting for Ethan or Drew to come out of the big old house. She wasn’t stupid. She knew he would normally have just knocked on the door and said hello. Ali and Ashlyn didn’t talk about Sam much that Fall. September had been so weird and sad and then October just seemed to race by them before they knew it. It wasn’t until the last week of October that that changed.

“Thank you for letting me come with you this time sweetheart” Ashlyn kissed her wife’s hand as she stood next to the table in the exam room where the ultrasound technician had just finished the procedure and left the room. “Are you ready to get up?”

“Yeah, it’s really not that big a deal Ash” Ali sat up after taking her feet out of the stirrups. The brunette loved how sweet and attentive her keeper was being but it wasn’t necessary. “It’s just a little awkward, but that’s it” she shrugged and let Ashlyn help her off the table.

“Well, thank you anyway. I know you’re getting used to them but...but I still have a hard time sometimes” the blonde admitted shyly as she stepped out of the way so Ali could get to the chair where her clothes for the bottom half of her body were piled up.

“You never told me that” the brunette stopped and hugged her wife, holding her tightly for almost a full minute. “I didn’t know this was still bothering you honey. Why didn’t you tell me?” Her voice wasn’t accusatory or harsh, just soft and steady and loving.

“I don’t know” Ashlyn shrugged and looked down, feeling foolish. “I guess I don’t want to add to your worry.”

“Ashlyn” Ali lifted her wife’s chin up until their eyes met. “I gave you some time and space when we first found out about all of this but I need you to start talking to me about it now. It’s been over a year since I got my BRCA results back and this is my fourth ultrasound this year. You’re not going to add to my worry babe, I promise. I’m going to worry if you don’t talk to me about it” she cupped her wife’s cheek and caressed it gently with her thumb.

“Sorry” Ashlyn sighed and blushed a little. “I’ll do better. I don’t like to make you think about it if you don’t have to, so I’m afraid to bring it up.”

“Oh honey” Ali hugged her again and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. She shivered when the cool air in the room hit her bare backside through the hospital gown that was open all the way down the back. “Just talk to me, please. Whenever you need to. If I’m having a bad day and I don’t feel up to it, I’ll tell you. I promise” she shivered again.

“Here baby, get dressed” Ashlyn chuckled and patted her bare butt. “I can’t believe I just said that.”

“Ha” Ali laughed as she reached for her panties and brought them over towards the counter with the paper towels. “There’s a first time for everything apparently.”

The brunette cleaned herself up as best as she could with the paper towels after handing her wife the hospital gown.

“I wish I’d been here for all of them” the keeper spoke softly as she watched her wife.

“Well, they’ve all been exactly like this one, except with a different technician. Hand me the panty liner from my purse will you?” she nodded at her purse in the chair with her pants and coat.

“Here” Ashlyn did as she was asked. “I know it’s not practical for me to try and come to them all, but if you ever feel like you want me to be at one of them I’ll find a way.”

“You’re so sweet” Ali smiled and took her pants from her wife, stepping into them quickly because she was chilly. “And same goes for you, like today. If you want to come you’re always welcome.”

Ashlyn put her wife’s shoes in front of her and helped her step into them before standing up and hugging her again.

“I love you. And I’m so proud of you for being so strong through this. I knew you would be” the blonde smiled and helped her wife into her coat as they both took one last look behind them to see if they’d forgotten anything. “You don’t always have to be though. You know that right?”

“Yeah, I know. I have this really awesome wife who reminds me all the time” Ali smiled at her sweet keeper again as they left the room. “She’s pretty great.”

They walked to their cars arm in arm, enjoying the moment. It was Tuesday afternoon and, to take advantage of their situation and change things up, Ashlyn would go to Lynnfield and pick up the twins from daycare while Ali went up to Gloucester to pick up Josie from her friend Kayla’s house. Sam would drop Drew off in time for dinner. 

“Oh, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about this for a week now and I keep forgetting” Ali began as she took her coat off and tossed it into the passenger seat of the minivan with her purse. “I want us to talk to Sam about Halloween when he drops Drew off today so we need to talk first.”

“Ok” Ashlyn frowned a little as she stood outside the door of the minivan after the brunette had climbed in and rolled the window down. “Halloween’s on Friday and Drew’s class has the costume day. Then we’re taking the kids trick or treating after dinner. What’s there to talk about?”

“Ash, don’t get mad...”

“I’m not mad” she replied too quickly and with too much weight behind her words.

“I’m sure you don’t remember this and I would never expect you to, but I promised Sam last year that we would do Halloween with Ethan this year...”

“Ugh” Ashlyn closed her eyes and her face immediately softened. “That’s right” she opened her eyes and exhaled loudly as Ali took one of her hands from the car door and covered it with her own. “Yeah, I still want to do that. If he can’t give his son an awesome Halloween then we’ll do it.”

“Ashlyn...”

“No, I know” the keeper shook her head and chastised herself for her choice of words. “I didn’t mean it like that. I get it and I feel bad for them both too. Whenever I want to get mad at Sam or judge him I just take a minute and put myself in his shoes and...” she couldn’t even say the words out loud and she didn’t have to. Ali knew what she meant and squeezed her hand. “Well, you know.”

“I do know” the brunette smiled adoringly at her wife, standing there struggling with so many different emotions but letting her compassion lead the way as it so often did. “You and your big heart” she bit her bottom lip, suddenly very moved by everything Ashlyn had done to be at her appointment with her that afternoon and by everything she was going to do to make sure a little boy who lost his mother could enjoy her favorite holiday again. “You’re really something else, you know that?”

“I love you too baby” Ashlyn smiled and leaned in the window for a kiss. “See you at home.”

//

As soon as it started to get dark, about 5:40pm, Ali and her mom took the four Krieger kids and Ethan out to start trick or treating. They were going to do it in shifts so both Ashlyn and Ali had a chance to be out with the kids and also in the house greeting the other neighborhood kids. Deb and Mike were extra sets of hands and would go wherever they were needed. The twins were almost 2-1/2 so they weren’t going to last long and, honestly, Josie probably wouldn’t make it much longer either. Drew was 6-1/2 and had been so excited to be able to trick or treat with Ethan that he could probably go all night long. Ethan was going to sleep over and then go with the Kriegers to the soccer games in the morning and meet up with his dad there. It was the last weekend of soccer games for the season. They had been so pumped about their costumes that they couldn’t wait to put them on. As soon as they had finished their pizza for dinner they ran into the front living room to start getting ready. Drew was going to be Groot and Ethan was going to be Rocket Raccoon and they looked freaking awesome. Josie was Wonder Woman for the second year in a row and had absolutely no problem with it. Lily couldn’t make up her mind for the longest time and Ashlyn finally put a deadline on it of the Sunday before Halloween. She and Ali were almost finished with their Championship Week obligations and would be able to focus on finding or making whatever costume their little ones wanted. But Lily still kept changing her mind.

“Let’s put our foot down tomorrow, as long as it’s not Doc McStuffins...” Ali began Monday night after the kids were in bed.

“But I think that’s the one she really wants to be” Ashlyn countered.

“I know” Ali nodded. “I think so too. That’s why we can’t put our foot down if it’s Doc McStuffins...”

“Ah, because she’ll refuse whatever we insist on” Ashlyn nodded along with her brilliant wife. “So we save Doc McStuffins for her after she has her fit.”

“Yes. And I hate that we know she’s going to have a fit already” Ali sighed. “I don’t want her to be spoiled and I’m so worried that we’re doing that already.”

“Hey, she’s 2-1/2. She’ll get better and grow out of it. We’ll make sure she does” Ashlyn tried to reassure the brunette even though she had the same fear. “And we’ll use it as a teachable moment, right?”

“One of these years we’re really going to have to put our foot down and it’s going to be horrible” Ali groaned.

“Let’s just keep helping her try to understand and hope she grows out of it fast” Ashlyn encouraged. “But I think you’re right” she sighed and then chuckled ruefully.

Dodge couldn’t decide either but it was more because he kept trying to be what his siblings wanted him to be. Drew wanted him to wear his old T-Rex costume. Josie wanted him to be a super hero, Captain America, like her. And Lily wanted him to be the sidekick to whatever costume she was currently leaning towards wearing. His moms had finally gotten him alone and asked him what he wanted to dress up as for Halloween and told him not to worry about what anybody else was wearing. They told him to think about what would make him happiest. 

“George” he replied with a broad smile after thinking for a minute.

“Who’s George?”  
“George, our friend the builder?”

“Ah-huh” he nodded. “Fix the roof.”

“He sure did” Ali grinned at their boy and then winked at her wife.

“So you want to be a builder, like George?” Ashlyn clarified.

“Hard head” Dodge tapped his head and smiled again.

“He does wear a hard hat sometimes” the brunette nodded and chuckled at her son’s antics.

“Should we find you a costume with a hard hat Dodger?” Ashlyn couldn’t resist how cute he was and picked him up and spun him around in her arms. “And a big tool belt?”

“Ah-huh” he wrapped his little arms around his Mama’s neck and giggled as they twirled around the kitchen.

That Halloween night, Ashlyn watched the motley crew make their way down the driveway and chuckled. She was going to miss seeing Dodge and Lily actually trick or treating, but she didn’t want to leave just Mike or Deb at their house. She wanted to see the other neighborhood kids trick or treating too. She and Ali and Deb had decorated the big old house a bit more than they had in previous years. It had historically been a busy time of year for both moms and they had given Halloween short shrift in the past. But not this year. As busy as they had been with Championship week and everything else, they made sure they put in extra effort on the house this year. Neither of them wanted to admit it was at least partially for Ethan’s benefit, but it was. It had only been 45 minutes since they had left the house when the mudroom door flew open and Ali ran into the front living room, out of breath.

“What’s the matter?” Ashlyn stood up immediately, expecting the worst. “Who’s hurt?”

“What?” Ali cocked her head and tried to catch her breath while the dogs got up and walked circles around her in greeting. “No” she smiled and shook her head, still breathing hard. “You’ve gotta see the twins in action. Go on” she pointed towards the door. “Hurry up, mom’s alone with all of them and Lily’s already tired. They’re across the street at old Mrs. Ornstein’s” she smiled at her wife and practically pushed her out the door. “We went up Beach Rd and back” she walked to the door and called out after Ashlyn who was jogging down the driveway. “Do Harbor Rd next!”

Everybody made it home safe and sound and loaded down with more candy than they would ever be able to eat. They had come back at about 7pm to pee and drop off the twins who were toast. Ashlyn and Deb had been carrying them ever since Ali had switched places with her wife a half hour earlier. Poor Josie had a heck of a time deciding whether to go back out with Drew and Ethan or stay at home and eat candy with Dodge and Lily. Everyone looked pretty comfy in the front living room and when she heard Ali telling the twins to compare candy and see if they wanted to trade anything, she decided she wanted in on that. Ashlyn wondered if their eldest daughter was really smart enough to know that she would have better odds trading with the little kids than she would with the bigger boys, or if she had chosen for comfort and convenience. Either way, she made the smart choice for sure. Ashlyn winked at her wife and Ali grinned back at her.

“Don’t keep them out too late now” the brunette teased. “Only another half hour or so” she got up and gave Ashlyn a quick kiss and patted her hips. “They’ll never get to sleep tonight if we let them eat candy so late.”

“Oh how the tables have turned” Deb laughed at her daughter as she helped the youngest kids get out of their costumes. “Your mommy used to beg me to let her stay up late and eat candy all night long when she was a little girl” she grinned at Josie.

“Mommy did?” Josie asked, wide-eyed.

“She did” Deb kissed her cheek as she pulled the Wonder Woman costume off of her. “She loved her chocolate, even when she was a little girl.”

“Alright Groot, Rocket, let’s get back out there. We’ve got two more blocks to hit and that candy’s not just gonna end up in your buckets by itself!” Ashlyn’s enthusiasm filled the room as Drew and Ethan scrambled towards the door.

“Need back-up?” Deb asked.

“Nah, we’re good” the keeper smiled. “Aren’t we guys?”

“Yeah!”  
“Let’s go!”

It was a late night full of sugar highs and crashes and all the adults knew there was no way around it. They were just thankful that it was a Friday night instead of a school night and let the kids enjoy themselves. Ali happily ate most of the dark chocolate that none of the kids liked and Ashlyn polished off anything sour that the little ones couldn’t handle or didn’t want to try. There were a couple of skirmishes between Drew and Dodge and Drew and Josie but nothing too traumatic. The whole world almost came to an end when Fred plopped down onto Lily and Dodge’s piles of candy on the floor. If the screaming hadn’t been so ear-splitting it probably would have been pretty funny. The 8:00pm bedtime and storytime routine turned into a 9:15 just go to bed time. They all had soccer games the next day and needed their rest. When Ali and Ashlyn finally climbed into their own bed after cleaning up downstairs they were exhausted but very very happy. It had been one of the most fun nights they had shared as a family. Having Deb and Mike there had been wonderful too. And both moms felt good about giving Ethan a Halloween that might have come close to what his own mother would have done.

“Oh man I’m beat” Ashlyn groaned as she pulled the covers up to her chest.

“How’s your knee?” Ali asked as she turned her light off and rolled over to tuck herself into her wife’s left side. 

“What? It’s fine. What do you mean?”

“Oh don’t even” Ali poked her in the ribs as she threw her left leg over her keeper’s hips and pulled herself in tight. “I saw you limping when you were coming up the driveway tonight with the boys. You need to go get that looked at babe. It’s not just going to get better. I’ll go with you if you want...”

“You will?” Ashlyn’s voice was surprisingly tentative and small.

“Honey” Ali leaned her head up and kissed the blonde’s jaw. “Of course I will. Do you want me to make the appointment too?” her words were kind and soft and she squeezed Ashlyn’s torso and pressed another kiss into her shoulder.

“Nah, I can do it. I just...” she sighed wearily and scrubbed her face with her free hand, the other one wrapped securely around her beautiful brunette. “I’m just dreading whatever it is. I retired, partly so I wouldn’t have to worry about this kind of shit.”

“I know, but maybe it’s just something little. I’d hate for you to be suffering if there’s a simple fix that could make your knee feel better” Ali spoke in a soothing voice and gently caressed her wife’s chest.

“Yeah, you’re right” Ashlyn sighed again and gave Ali a worried little half smile. “I’ll call on Monday and make the appointment. I’ll let you know and maybe if you can make it...”

“I’ll be there babe. I promise” Ali picked her head up and pulled Ashlyn’s down towards her, bringing their lips together in a sweet kiss. “It’ll be ok. Whatever it is, we’ll handle it” she mumbled against her lips and then kissed her again.

They settled back into their sleeping positions and quickly felt their bodies starting to fall asleep. Just before she drifted off to sleep, Ashlyn shared one last thought about the night’s activities.

“I wonder which kid is gonna be the one who pukes all over the soccer pitch tomorrow morning...”

//

It had been Drew. His stomach was the least stable of all of the kids and always had been. Ashlyn should have been able to predict it precisely but she thought it might have been Josie because she inhaled almost her body weight in chocolate that night. But she had made it through her game, just before her big brother’s team took one of the other fields at the big collection of grass playing fields. Poor Drew. He made it almost to the edge of the sideline, way down by the other 18-yard line, before tossing the contents of his stomach onto the grass field. Everybody groaned in either disgust or sympathy as Ashlyn jogged over to him with a bottle of water and some Kleenex Ali had trained her to always keep in her jacket pockets.

“He’s not sick, nothing contagious. He just ate too much candy last night” she called out to the other parents as she moved quickly past them. “Sorry.”

Ali chewed her bottom lip as she watched from her place on the sideline with the team. It killed her to not go to her son but her job was to coach the rest of the team and the ref called for the sub and the game continued. The brunette tried to keep her wife and son in her peripheral vision as she called out instructions to the other boys on the pitch. She was relieved to see both Ashlyn and Drew smiling a few minutes later, still down in the corner where there were far fewer spectators and parents. Ashlyn poured the rest of the bottle of water onto the mess Drew had left and then walked him back to the sideline with the other players waiting for their turns in the game.

“He’s good. Says he feels better now” she whispered to Ali before moving back towards their seats. She could see her wife’s shoulders relax when she heard her words.

Vicki handed Ashlyn a roll of paper towels from the bag Ali packed every week for who knew what reason. The family members often teased her but she always said that she never knew what her team might need and she wanted to be prepared. The keeper swallowed hard and went back to finish cleaning up Drew’s mess, getting a grin and a wink from Ken as she did so. Ah, motherhood. The gift that just kept on giving. She barely had time to ponder the disgusting situation because by the time she had thrown almost half the roll of paper towels into the garbage can, Drew was back on the pitch and advancing the ball quickly towards the opponent’s 18. Ashlyn started cheering and shouting encouragement, completely forgetting why she was down at that end of the pitch in the first place.

“Go Drew, go!! Keep your head up!” she yelled excitedly as her son took on a defender and beat him. 

“Pass the ball!” Ali yelled from her spot on the sideline, her hands cupped around her mouth for full effect. “Ben’s open!! Get him the ball Drew!!”

Ashlyn secretly wanted her boy to beat the only other defender between him and the goalkeeper but she knew her wife was right. The best play was to pass to Ben who was making a run to his left. The moment seemed to take forever, but Drew heeded his coach’s advice and passed the ball to his teammate. Ben promptly kicked the ball right into the goalkeeper’s waiting arms. He had muffed the kick and the ball rolled slowly and harmlessly towards the goal before being scooped up.

“Follow it up!! Follow it up!!” Ashlyn shouted and smiled when both boys ran after the ball.

Drew kicked the grass in frustration as he turned away and started back towards the middle of the pitch. Ashlyn and Ali both grinned because they knew their boy didn’t like to lose and that was something you just couldn’t teach. If Drew had any hope of becoming a successful athlete, even at the high school level, he would need to hate losing. The ref blew her whistle for halftime and Ashlyn could hear her wife coaching up the kids as she walked back to her seat with the rest of the family.

“That’s alright Ben” she put her arm around his shoulders. “The shot was there and you took it and that’s exactly what you were supposed to do” she smiled at him and was happy to see him inflate again at her encouragement. “We all need to work on our shots, right?” she looked at the rest of the team and nodded her head as they ate their orange slices and drank their water. “Drew that was a great pass to set up that shot. Good job buddy” she ruffled her son’s hair and then moved on to praise the other boys for something they did during the first half.

When Ashlyn got back to the folding chairs and blanket the extended Krieger family had set up she was surprised to see Sam Machado standing there talking to Ken Krieger. She paused just for a second.

“Mama!” Dodge shouted and jumped up to wrap his arms around her legs. “Drew throwed up!”

“Yes he did” she chuckled as she reached down and picked him up. She met Sam’s gaze and he nodded at her almost apologetically before getting back to the conversation he was having with Ken. “But he’s ok now. Did you see that great pass he made?”

After the game they made plans to go to their favorite diner and Ken invited Sam and Ethan to join them, as he had done a dozen times before. Ali was talking to the assistant coach and only half paying attention to her family at that moment, but Ashlyn heard the invitation and saw Sam look to her for guidance on what to answer. Before the keeper could figure out what to say, Sam spoke.

“Oh, thanks but we should get home” he smiled and nodded at Ethan. “I’ve still gotta hear all about the big Halloween night and everything” he grinned at his son who looked disappointed.

“Oh, well, ok” Ken smiled back, not sure what was going on but thinking maybe something was slightly amiss. “Next time then.” Ken knew basketball season was right around the corner.

As Vicki, Ken, Ali and Deb started gathering everything up Sam spoke again, this time quieter.

“Ash, can I ask you something real quick?” 

“What’s up?” the blonde asked as she walked the short distance to Sam and then moved with him three more steps away from the group for some privacy.

“Listen, I’m sorry about that” he nodded back towards her family. “Ken saw me and he had Josie with him and he told me to come sit with you guys and I didn’t know what to do...”

“It’s ok Sam” Ashlyn replied evenly, her hands on her hips. “I get it.” She looked down and wished things were different. She knew she would never like him as much as she once had, but she was happy that she didn’t hate him as much as she had ten months ago either. “Thanks for telling me.”

“Of course” he said quickly. “And thank you again for last night. I don’t think I’ve seen Ethan look this happy in a very long time.” He looked into the keeper’s stoic face and smiled sincerely. “Thank you.”

“Anything for Ethan” the keeper replied with a tiny smile. “Oh, and they ate a lot of candy last night. We sort of let them go a little crazy” she chuckled. “You can see how well Drew handled it.”

“That’s what Halloween’s for” he looked at his son who was laughing with Drew about something a few feet away. “Besides, he’s got an iron stomach. He’ll be just fine.”

“Good to know” she nodded.

“Oh, and one more thing...” he added quickly. “I’d like to coach the baseball team this Spring. I’m assuming Drew and Ethan will be on the same team again and I just want to make sure...”

“That’s great Sam” Ashlyn gave him the first real smile of the conversation. She had felt a little guilty taking soccer away from him and she was coaching basketball so that got ruled out too. Baseball was all that was left and she wondered if that was why he had decided to do it. “The boys will both love that.”

“Good” he smiled sheepishly and almost blushed. “Ok, well, have a good lunch. Ethan, let’s go pal.”

Everybody said goodbye to both Machados and Ali gave her wife a questioning look as the Krieger clan moved towards the parking lot. Ashlyn winked at her and bumped their shoulders together as they carried chairs and various other things in their arms.

“Everything ok?” the brunette asked quietly, watching the three grandparents each take one of the three youngest grandchildren by the hand in the parking lot.

“Yep” Ashlyn replied with a small smile. “Drew you stay right behind Vivi” she spoke louder and gave her son a serious look. She could feel her wife still looking at her as they walked along behind the rest of their family. “It’s ok Al” the keeper’s voice was low and soft again. “I’ll tell you about it later. Everything’s good.”

Ali bumped her wife’s shoulder and blinked up at her through her lashes. Her voice was still quiet when she spoke through another small smile.

“I love you.”

It wasn’t until after lunch that Ken asked his daughter about what was going on with Sam. They were in the backyard with Drew, Josie and the dogs, kicking the soccer ball around. Both kids were still in their soccer uniforms with cleats and shin guards in place. Ashlyn, Vicki and Deb were putting the twins down for their naps inside the big old house.

“So what’s going on with Sam?” he asked quietly as he stood beside his daughter, shoulder to shoulder, watching both kids kick soccer balls into the small practice net by the side of the garage. They were far enough away so their conversation was private. “If something’s changed and I shouldn’t invite him to lunch anymore all you have to do is tell me.”

He never took his eyes off of his grandchildren as he spoke and Ali was thankful that he couldn’t see the shock on her face as she reacted to his question.

“Keep your eye on the ball” she called out to her daughter. “Watch your foot hit it Jose” she smiled at the sight of her fierce little redhead concentrating on kicking that damned soccer ball. She let out a sigh and lowered her voice. “Nothing’s going on. Everything’s fine Dad.”

“Alex, I’ve known you for 41 years now and you’ve always been a terrible liar” he crossed his arms and kept his eyes focused on the kids. “Did something happen? Are you and the kids ok?”

It was getting difficult to keep the fear and unease out of his voice. They could both feel the tension radiating off of the other as they stood there, side by side. It took a lot of willpower for Ken to stand there, waiting for his daughter to talk to him, and not go and correct Drew’s plant foot placement as he took his shots.

“Dad, it’s fine” she answered tersely, jaw clenching. “Please, just leave it alone.”

Ashlyn joined them a minute later, broad smile on her face as she took in the sight of the father and daughter soccer coaches standing in identical poses as they concentrated, more seriously than she really thought was necessary, on the two kids in front of them.

“Lily asked to use the potty before her nap” the blonde enthused. “I think she’s ready for official potty training! One less kid in diapers! Woo hoo hoo!!” she put her hands above her head and did a little dance as she approached Ken and Ali.

“That’s great honey” Ali smiled weakly at her wife and then walked past her on her way into the house, leaving Ashlyn standing there and very confused.

“What’s with her?” the keeper looked over her shoulder as the brunette moved quickly to the gate and then disappeared around the side of the house by the driveway. “She’s been dying for the twins to start potty training...”

“Mama! Watch!” Josie’s face lit up when she saw the new audience member.

“Great kick Drew” Ken complimented after his grandson finally, and accidentally, put his plant foot in the right place. “Did you feel how much better that one was?”

“Ah-huh” the boy grinned back.

“Let’s see what you’ve got JoJo” Ashlyn nodded and grinned at her daughter. “Unleash that left foot and let her fly.”

“She’s mad at me, not you” Ken said quietly as Ashlyn took her wife’s place at his side.

“Oh, well yay for me but that sucks for you” she chuckled.

“She won’t tell me what’s going on with Sam” he replied matter-of-factly and turned to look at the keeper. “So that means you’re going to have to.”

Ashlyn flinched under his intense stare and took a minute to compose herself. She didn’t like to lie, especially not to family, and she wasn’t sure she could even if she tried. She finally met his concerned gaze and swallowed hard.

“Everything’s ok Ken, I promise” she nodded for emphasis. “But we’re not... as close with Sam as we were last year. That’s all.”

She watched her father-in-law clench his jaws several times and she was pretty sure she saw some smoke coming out of his ears as he struggled to keep his anger in check. Ken was a smart guy and really fucking observant. Ashlyn was surprised it had taken him this long to notice something had changed between the Kriegers and Sam Machado.

“Ashlyn...” his voice was low and serious. “Did something happen?”

The keeper could hear the anguish in his voice and knew his mind must be reeling with equally frightening or distasteful scenarios. 

“Look, Ken, everything is fine now” she gave him the best smile she could muster to help ease his worry. “I’m telling you. If something was wrong I wouldn’t be able to hide it. We’re all good...”

“But something did happen...” anger flashed in his eyes and Ashlyn reached out and squeezed his arm before patting it.

“We’re all ok. I swear it” she smiled softly at him as he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Just don’t invite him to lunch anymore, ok?”


	40. Show & Tell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut warning, but it has nothing to do with the show & tell.....just for the record.

“Thank you both for coming in this afternoon” Josie’s preschool teacher greeted Ashlyn and Ali warmly and sat with them near her desk in the corner of the classroom. 

“It’s nice to see you again Ms. Moran” Ali smiled at the young teacher.

She was a wonderful, caring, engaged and thoughtful young woman who had been teaching preschool kids for three years. She had all the right degrees from the best colleges and had become a favorite of the Krieger family when Drew became one of the students in her very first preschool class. As much as both Ashlyn and Ali liked her, they were frustrated that fall by the number of times they had been in to see the teacher. For a lot of students, this parent-teacher conference night in mid-November would be the first real conversation their parents would have with Ms. Moran. Some 4-year olds had trouble adjusting to preschool and needed some extra help making the transition to going to school every single day. Those kids’ parents spoke with Ms. Moran as much as necessary, usually by phone or email, to make sure everybody was doing what was best for the child who was struggling. 

Josephine Marie Krieger had not struggled making her transition to preschool. Quite the opposite. She had blossomed and grown even more confident once she started going to school. But Ali and Ashlyn had gone in and met with Ms. Moran three different times already that Fall because some of the kids had been teasing Josie about the big birthmark on her neck. It was natural for kids to be curious about it and Josie had dealt with that her whole life. But through much of her early life, the other kids couldn’t talk or at least not very well. Now that she and her classmates were 4 years old and speaking volumes compared to previous years, some of the things being said were insensitive at best and cruel at worst. As angry as Ashlyn had been to hear the young teacher explain, for the first time, what was going on in her classroom the second week of school, her wife had practically lost her mind. Ali almost threatened bodily harm to any child who bullied her daughter, but Ashlyn had squeezed her hand so hard that she had drawn blood inside her palm with her blunt nails and gotten the brunette’s attention at the last possible second. Once Ali had calmed down the three women talked about the problem and tried to find a solution. Before they could come up with a plan they all liked, Ms. Moran called them in again to talk about another incident of Josie getting teased about the birthmark. She explained that the only way to fight the fear and ignorance that was at the root of all bullying was through education. Ms. Moran explained that she wanted to do a show and tell exercise and have Josie show and talk about her giraffe birthmark when it was her turn. She thought it would be a good idea if one of her moms could come with her to help explain it and answer any questions the kids had.

So in early October, Ali had gone in and talked to Josie’s class about different kinds of birthmarks and other body marks that many of the kids had on their own bodies. Ms. Moran had contacted all of the parents to notify them of the problem and what their solution had been and how they wanted to talk about different marks on different bodies. The teacher, in her three years of experience, knew that those little 4-year olds were going to start ripping their clothes off to show everybody whatever scar or birthmark they had on their own little bodies as soon as Josie started talking about hers. Ms. Moran asked the parents to help their kids find a scar or birthmark or even a large freckle someplace on their body that would be fit for public viewing. Nobody had to participate, but if they wanted to they should have an idea where on their body they could find it and share it. The other reason she sent the email to all the parents was because she didn’t want anybody complaining after the fact about any stories of stripping in class and looking at each other’s unclothed bodies. She wanted to avoid that but at the very least she wanted the parents to have the real story about what was going on.

“I think you should do it babe” Ali suggested back in early October, a few nights before the big show and tell day. “You’re perfect for this, in so many ways...”

“I don’t want to go in there with all my tattoos and complicate the issue” Ashlyn shook her head and frowned. “I’ve thought a lot about it Al and I don’t think it’s a good idea. I don’t want this to be about anything other than Josie. And you know as well as I do that if I go in there, all the kids are going to remember is that Josie’s mom has tattoos all over her arms.”

“I didn’t think about that” Ali frowned too. “But what about my tattoo?” she stuck her left arm out between them as they sat at the nook table folding clothes.

“Yours is so much easier to cover up” the keeper took her wife’s hand and gave her a sad smile. “You know even if I wear long-sleeves you can still see the ink at my wrist.”

“Yeah, ok, I guess. This makes me mad too” Ali frowned again. “Why should we have to cover up our tattoos?”

“Well, we don’t have to. Ms. Moran never said we did. I just really want the day to be about Josie and not either one of us. I think that’s really important” Ashlyn squeezed Ali’s hand and ran her thumb across the back of it.

“Ok” Ali sighed after another thoughtful moment. “I get what you’re saying. Send in the boring one. I’m on it” she chuckled and grinned at the blonde.

“You know I don’t think you’re boring honey” Ashlyn returned her grin. “But on Wednesday, if you could be boring as fuck I think that would be great.”

And that’s what Ali had done. Josie did the show and tell part, using some pictures they had printed off from the internet to help talk about her birthmark. Ali joined her and went into more detail and answered several questions from the curious students and even a couple from some of the parents who had come in to help volunteer for the day or help with their child’s show and tell. By the time they were finished, most of the kids had located some sort of skin marking on their own body and that helped them understand better that Josie’s was just bigger and in a more noticeable place. It had been a huge success and none of her classmates teased her anymore about her birthmark after that. At least not until a new student joined the class at the beginning of November. That third visit to Ms. Moran’s classroom after school had been because Josie had pushed the new kid to the ground after he teased her about her birthmark. Obviously that wasn’t ok and both moms had a stern sit-down with their daughter later that evening about not pushing or hitting. But deep down, they were both proud of her for sticking up for herself. Their little fighter was definitely the toughest of all of their kids and she didn’t even realize it yet. 

“Please tell me she didn’t push somebody else” Ashlyn said, only half-joking.

“No, no, nothing like that” Ms. Moran chuckled.

They talked for ten minutes about Josie’s communication skills, social/emotional skills, reading/writing skills, colors and shapes, numbers, and motor skills, moving right down the in-progress report card. Josie was an exceptional student and had gotten great grades in every category. Ali and Ashlyn were trying really hard not to get too excited about their little genius. It was only preschool and they didn’t want to set their expectations or demands for her too high, based simply on three months of preschool. It was exhilarating to see one of their children excel though, and they allowed themselves a few moments of celebration every now and then.

“She’s a better student than Drew was at her age, that’s pretty clear” Ali commented when the teacher finished reviewing the progress report. “It’s hard for us to know, is she that much smarter than everybody or is Drew...”

“No, no, I know it’s hard to get a handle on the spectrum of what different kids are good at and capable of” Ms. Moran interrupted, understanding where Ali was going with the question. “But just because Drew isn’t as good a student as Josie doesn’t mean he’s a bad student. I think Drew’s fine, at least he was when I had him” she smiled. “He’s probably even better now that he’s used to school a bit more. I think Josie is the one who is not performing at the same level as everybody else, in a good way of course.”

“Ok, so Drew’s normal and Josie’s really smart” Ashlyn simplified. “Is that a fair take on it?”

“Well, you know I’m only supposed to talk about Josie...”

“Please Christie, we’re just trying to figure out if we need to push Drew more or if there’s no chance he’ll ever be able to get the grades Josie will” Ali pleaded, using the teacher’s first name, which she rarely did.

“Come on teach, please...” Ashlyn added her charm to the request.

“Yes, in general. Yes” Ms. Moran smiled and shook her head. “But what I want to talk to you about is Josie’s music skills. If that’s ok?”

Ali and Ashlyn looked at each other with wide eyes.

“Of course, go right ahead” Ashlyn answered curiously.

“How long has she been taking piano lessons?” the teacher asked and got ready to take notes.

“Umm, she doesn’t take piano lessons” Ali replied after glancing at her wife and seeing the same confused look on her face that she must have on her own. “What makes you think she does?”

“Oh, wow.” Ms. Moran sat back in her chair with her own confused look. “I just assumed...”

“What’s going on?” Ashlyn’s voice was anxious.

“Nothing’s wrong. No, nothing like that” the teacher replied quickly. “We have the piano in the rec room, you know...”

“Yes, the same one that was here when Drew was here” Ali nodded along.

“When we have free time in there Josie goes over to the piano and...plays it.”

“What do you mean, plays it?” Ashlyn squinted at the young woman, trying to understand.

“Well, I mean, she’s not playing any song I know or anything like that. I’m not saying she’s a child prodigy. But she sits on the bench and plays on the keys and it’s not like the racket that most kids her age make come out of the piano” she chuckled. “I thought she had been taking lessons and was practicing the scales or something like that.”

“My brother-in-law plays and she’s seen him and sat with him a few times but that’s about it” Ali offered as she thought about Nathan’s advice to get her into music lessons.

“Do you have a piano at home? Does she play on it there too?”

“No, umm, we have one yes. But we keep it locked” Ashlyn admitted and blushed a little bit. “We had a few finger slamming incidents with the keyboard cover so we just locked it because nobody in the house plays it.” The keeper decided not to bore the teacher with the details of how some of the over eager children in the house would climb over the gates designed to keep them out of the front parlor.

“It’s totally up to you, of course, and don’t mind me” Ms. Moran started to sound like she was backtracking on the subject. “I just think she really loves it and she may have a real gift...”

“Which we’ll never know if we don’t let her play the damned thing” Ashlyn exhaled in frustration and looked at her wife for guidance.

“Let’s get her some music lessons and see what happens” Ali shrugged back at her.

They had talked about it after the first time Nathan had brought it up, back in April. But then The Academy happened and Germany happened and vacation and the 40th birthday bash and then school started and now, here they were seven months later and they still hadn’t done anything about Josie’s obvious affection for the piano in their front parlor. Both moms felt negligent and shared a look expressing sadness and regret.

“Studies have shown that music education enhances a child’s comprehension abilities, helps them with math concepts, assists in the development of fine motor skills, and helps to build self-confidence” the teacher explained eagerly. “I’m a firm believer in it and I wish we did more music-based activities here. This is the perfect age to introduce kids to the basics.”

“Did we miss it with Drew?” Ali’s voice was anxious. “Is it too late?”

“No” the teacher chuckled again and smiled warmly at the two moms who clearly cared a lot about their children’s development. “It’s never too late. Some people say you should wait until they’re 5 or 6 so they can sit still a bit longer and focus better. I think a group music lesson should be mandatory in all preschool classrooms, but that’s just me.”

“Thank you Ms. Moran” Ashlyn grinned, excited by the possibility that their kids could grow up to be musicians. “We’ll talk about it but I’m pretty sure you just sold us on it.”

“When I see one of my kids displaying the kind of interest that Josie is, I make sure I talk to the parents about it, regardless of what it is. In Josie’s case it’s definitely music. Good luck.”

By the end of the month, Ali had all four kids enrolled in a general music class at a small studio classroom in nearby Rockport. They brought all four kids up once a week to participate in the group lesson. Ashlyn got the piano in the front parlor tuned and cleaned and put ‘electronic keyboard’ at the top of the Christmas gift list for that year. They made smaller keyboards designed specifically for kid-sized fingers to be able to reach the keys better. Santa was bringing one this year. Without a doubt. Both Ali and Ashlyn spent time with Josie sitting at the piano in the front parlor and touching the keys. Neither woman knew anything about it and the little girl looked at them expectantly every time. It was as if she kept hoping that one of them would all of a sudden know how to play the thing and launch into a song as they sat there together. They tried it with the other kids too, but Drew really wasn’t interested and Lily and Dodge were just too little to do anything other than bang on it. So, for the time being anyway, the piano was Josie’s domain and she did just what Ms. Moran said she had done. She played it. She pressed her little fingers onto the keys and seemed to find a way to make the notes sound ok together. She wasn’t creating a symphony or anything, not by a longshot. But it wasn’t the loud, discordant noise that so often came out of a piano with a young child at the keys. 

//

Thanksgiving was late that year, not until November 27th, and the month somehow felt like it was taking six weeks to get to the holiday. The first two weeks of November were full of Krieger kid milestones. Drew lost his first baby tooth and Lily was almost completely potty trained by the end of the second week. The two moms were elated about one milestone and saddened by the other. This time though, it was Ashlyn who had the surprisingly melancholy reaction to the kids getting older. She cried like a baby when Ali and Drew shared the exciting news with her. It had happened at school and Ali was on pick up duty that day so she found out about it first. Drew was ecstatic. But that was mostly because the tooth had been loose for several days and he was terrified that it would hurt when it finally came out, which it did not. His left lower incisor, front tooth, had come out while he was eating lunch and he had been lucky not to swallow it. He ran to show his Mama the tooth in the little plastic baggie, waving it above his head as he crossed the kitchen and headed to the sink where Ashlyn was drying her hands.

“Mama! Mama! My tooth came out!!” he shouted as he barreled into her legs with a hard hug.

“Oof” she groaned and chuckled, kneeling down to cup his chin and get a good look at the hole in the bottom of his mouth where the tooth used to be. She groaned even louder and sucked in a breath when she felt the pain in her right knee, but recovered quickly. “Let’s see here...wow, you have definitely lost a tooth” she smiled at the grinning boy in her hand. “Did it hurt?” she asked as she took the plastic bag from him and held it up for closer inspection.

“Nope. I was eating my sandwich and I bit down on something hard” he paused for a big breath, panting in his excitement. “I almost ate my own tooth!” he added, wide-eyed.

They shared a few more minutes together before Ashlyn ruffled his hair and kissed the top of his head to end the conversation. She greeted her wife and daughter, still hanging up coats and taking off shoes in the mudroom, and then quietly went up the front stairs. It took Ali a few minutes to realize she was missing, but after the brunette got the kids situated with their snacks and juices she went looking for her keeper. She went up the front stairs, listening at both twins’ doors to make sure they were still napping, and then went into the master bedroom. But Ashlyn wasn’t there.

“There you are” the brunette said softly as she pushed the half-open door to the studio all the way open and stepped into the room. “Are you ok, love?” she tilted her head a little and frowned sweetly at the keeper.

Ashlyn was standing with her back to the door, looking out the side window, towards the beach. It was 3pm and the sun was still shining through what was left of the leaves on the trees that early November day. The blonde had her arms folded across her chest as she stared through the glass. She didn’t move or say anything when her wife entered the room, but she was glad she was there. Ali walked to her and hugged her from behind, getting on her toes and resting her chin on Ashlyn’s strong shoulder. She pressed a kiss into her shoulder blade and then moved to Ashlyn’s side so she could see her face.

“Oh honey” the brunette cooed when she saw the tears streaming down her wife’s pretty face. “What’s wrong?” she asked as she moved in front of Ashlyn and started wiping the tears away with her hands. “Sweetheart...” she whispered and placed a gentle kiss on her keeper’s quivering lips.

Ashlyn didn’t say anything for a couple of minutes so Ali just hugged her and let her cry. As her sobs slowed down and the tears started to dry up, Ashlyn took some deep breaths and rubbed her face with her own hands as the brunette released her from the hug.

“Fuck” she moaned almost angrily as she swiped at her cheeks. “Ugh...I don’t know what my problem is...”

“It’s ok babe, you don’t have to know” Ali soothed as she rubbed her wife’s arm and kept her other hand on her hip. “It’s ok to be sad, or whatever it is that you’re feeling.”

“He was just fucking teething, wasn’t he?!” she asked, frustration filling her high voice. “How is he six already? How is he losing his fucking baby teeth already?” she looked pleadingly into her beautiful brunette’s face.

Ali could tell there was something else going on. There was a cloudiness behind those hazel eyes that meant trouble was brewing deep inside. She didn’t know what it was, or even if Ashlyn knew what it was yet, but she knew something was bothering the blonde besides Drew’s lost baby tooth. Ali also knew that she couldn’t rush the conversation. If Ashlyn wasn’t ready to talk yet, there was no use trying to push her. She had a quick flashback to some of their very earliest conversations, ten years ago, where she would stay as quiet as possible because she was afraid of spooking her new friend into silence again. 

“I don’t know” Ali shook her head sympathetically and squeezed her wife’s hip. “It doesn’t seem possible. At all” she smiled softly and met those watery hazel eyes. “I’m excited for him but sad as hell at the same time. Just like I was in September when Josie started school. I thought my heart was just going to die. I really...I really thought I was losing my mind for a little while there” she admitted.

“You did?” Ashlyn’s eyebrows went up to her hairline in surprise.

“Yeah, I did. I think it hit me so hard because I was already freaking about Erica and Tom” she explained as she let Ashlyn pull her into another hug. “Like, if I had found out about their divorce now I’d probably be having that freak out about Drew’s tooth instead. I don’t know” she shrugged and leaned back to look at her wife’s face. Ashlyn’s strong arms were around her waist and Ali’s were wrapped around her shoulders as they studied each other. “All I know is this motherhood thing is brutal. It’s been 6-1/2 years now and I swear to God my heart has just been an open, bleeding, raw wound the whole fucking time. I had no idea what having kids would do to my heart” she chuckled softly and shook her head. “I mean, I knew they’d make it bigger and fill it up, but I had no clue that all this pain was going to come with it.”

“That’s exactly how I feel too” Ashlyn agreed with a small smile. She leaned in and gave her wife a sweet kiss. “I used to be able to tell when I was feeling a little tender and maybe could use some alone time to get my head right or my heart right or whatever” she paused, thoughtfully. “But not anymore. These kids keep me in a constant state of rawness...or vulnerability. I don’t know how to say it” she shook her head and dropped her eyes.

“No, I get it babe. I feel the same way too” Ali reassured her and stroked her cheek.

“I can’t tell you how good it is to hear you say that” the blonde sighed with relief. “Really, I mean it.”

“I’m sorry we haven’t talked about this before Ash. I’ll try and be better about bringing this stuff up so we can share it. Maybe it’ll help us both feel better...or at least maybe not so freaked out” she smiled and gave her keeper a soft kiss, cupping her cheek at the same time.

They hugged for a couple of minutes, just holding onto each other and breathing together. They both knew the twins would be up any minute and Ali was frustrated because she felt like if she had another fifteen or twenty minutes she could get through and find out what else was bothering her wife. Maybe a visit to Mattie would be a good thing for both of them. Before she could even bring up the subject they both heard Lily a floor below them. Her little heels banging into the hardwood floor as she hopped out of bed.

“Ok, well, time to get back down there” Ashlyn pulled out of the hug and rubbed her face one last time. 

They knew they couldn’t dawdle because the twins were getting big enough and strong enough to climb the gates. At least Dodge certainly was. And that meant they could fall down the stairs too. They could do the stairs if someone was with them and often needed hand-holding on the way down.

“Why don’t you stay up here for a while...” Ali offered. “Until you feel like you want to join us.”

“Nah, I’m ok” Ashlyn smiled as they both started to walk towards the door, arm in arm. “They fill my heart up even more. Some sleepy little snuggles will be perfect right now.”

//

“Oh my God...fuck...unnnnhhhhh...” Ali moaned as she felt her wife’s strong fingers pounding into her. She arched her back off the bed and felt the sting of the restraints on both of her wrists as she tried to reach for her sexy keeper. “Shit” she winced but the fleeting sensation of pain was replaced immediately by more and more pleasure as Ashlyn sucked her nipples to stiff points, all the while keeping up a fast and steady pace with her fingers buried deep in the brunette’s pussy. “Oh Jesus...yes babe...yessss” she hissed as she felt the orgasm getting ready to spring.

“So fucking gorgeous” Ashlyn slurred out, tongue drunk with pleasure as it circled and then flicked her wife’s other nipple. “Mmmmmmm I love your nipples...so fucking sweet...” she grazed her teeth over the sensitive bud and felt the passion pool between her own legs when Ali whimpered and then groaned even more desperately than she had before.

“Ashlyn...unnnhhhhh...” was all the brunette could muster as her body rocked along in time with the hard thrusts. She tilted her hips to try and meet her wife’s strong hand with every pump she gave her. “Fuuuucckkkk...”

The keeper knew her girl was close and gave both nipples one last, strong suck before sliding her lips down Ali’s stomach and over her mound until she found the aching clit that was so desperate and needy for attention.

“Is this what you want baby?” she husked out after two quick flicks with her tongue had made Ali’s whole body lift off of the bed, only the back of her head and her heels pressing hard into the mattress to hold her up. “Damn, I guess so...” she growled out, incredibly turned on by the brunette’s eager display. “Fuck you’re incredible...so fucking gorgeous...” she mumbled as she brought her lips back down to her wife’s clit and started sucking all around it.

“Oh fuck...Jesus...don’t stop babe, please...” she begged, her breathing ragged as her chest started to heave. “Unnnnnhhhhh...please...don’t stop...”

Ashlyn only sucked harder on the sweet flesh between the brunette’s legs. She moved her mouth all around her clit and then began to flick it again with her strong tongue. She alternated between softer lapping licks and strong, hard flicks with the tip of her tongue. Ali’s body writhed and bounced and rolled as it worked towards its release. The keeper moved her left hand up to her wife’s breasts and took over where her mouth had left off a minute earlier. She palmed one breast and then the other, surprising Ali with a pinch of her nipple between her thumb and forefinger.

“Oh, yeah...mmmmmm...God that feels so good...”

Ashlyn felt the brunette’s right leg quiver beneath her arm and knew it was just a matter of seconds before she came. She didn’t have to worry about avoiding any kicks because both of her wife’s strong legs were tied down too. The keeper flicked her tongue harder and faster against Ali’s swollen clit while curling her fingers up into her g-spot with her last few thrusts. 

“Oh God...oh God...oh...God...” the brunette groaned out in a choked voice as the orgasm took over her body. 

Ali shook and jerked against the restraints as she came hard. All the muscles in her stomach clenched and her body tried to curl up as it shook and jerked in place. Ashlyn knew that she would come herself if she just rubbed her own clit a little bit. That’s how fucking turned on she was watching her wife get off.

“Fucking hell that’s hot” she husked out as she slowed her fingers down but kept them moving inside her beautiful brunette. She ran her other hand across both erect nipples a few times and then dragged her fingertips down Ali’s stomach and hips as she sat up to admire her work. “Fuck Al...you are just the most incredible...”

“Take...these...fucking...things...off...me...” the brunette panted out, gasping for breath and opening her eyes for the first time since the orgasm had swept over her.

“Alright sexy” the keeper chuckled when she saw the frustrated look on Ali’s face. “But I’ll need both hands for that” she teased as she slowly pulled her fingers out of her wife’s drenched center. She felt another gush between her own legs when Ali’s pussy twitched as she removed her fingers. “Fuck baby, you’re gonna make me come right now” she groaned and closed her eyes for a second as the desire flared up and out of control. 

Ashlyn straddled the brunette’s right leg, lowering her soaking wet folds down onto Ali’s hot skin and making the brunette suck in a breath when she felt the amazing sensation. 

“Jesus...” Ali husked out, eyes dark and wide, as she tried to catch her breath. She groaned as she watched Ashlyn slowly and carefully lick all of her juices off of her fingers. The brunette’s eyes were impossibly dark as her keeper started to drag her wet pussy up and then back down her leg. “Fucking...hell...” Ali choked out as the combination of images and sensations made her desperate with want again.

“Mmmmmm...you are so fucking sexy Al...I swear, I just about come every time you do” Ashlyn purred out as she continued to grind against her wife’s thigh. She brought her hands up to her own breasts and started to squeeze them and tug on her nipples, gasping as she did so. “Oh...mmmmmm...”

“Get up here” Ali commanded, her voice hoarse with desire. She stuck her chin out and moved it up as she lifted her right thigh as far as she could to get her wife moving. “I need you in my mouth...right now.”

Ashlyn saw the dark, hungry look in Ali’s eyes and felt her stomach flip flop in anticipation.

“But I need to untie your legs...”

“Just...leave them and get your ass up here so I can taste you” the brunette husked out, licking her lips at the thought.

The keeper smirked and bent over, kissing her way up Ali’s writhing body and crawling on top of it. She pressed her right knee into the brunette’s center one last time before moving higher up that body she loved so much. She took a minute and licked and sucked both nipples, earning another urgent command from her wife.

“Hurry up Ash...I need you...”

Ashlyn released her nipple with a loud pop and then brought their lips together in a deep, desperate, sloppy kiss that had them both gasping for air a minute later when they pulled apart.

“Damn woman” the blonde smirked at how desperate her wife was.

“Ashlyn, if you don’t get that sweet pussy of yours onto my face right now, I swear to God...”

But before she could finish the threat her keeper quickly moved into position and lowered her sopping wet folds down onto Ali’s eager mouth.

“Mmmmmmmmmm...” Ali groaned out and Ashlyn swore she could see her eyes roll back up into her head as she started to devour her.

Ashlyn had a knee on either side of her wife’s head and was holding onto the headboard of the bed to try and keep herself up. She quickly untied Ali’s hands so the brunette could control how much of the keeper’s body weight was on her face. As soon as her hands were free, Ali immediately clutched at her wife’s ass and pulled her down farther. She pressed her face up into her favorite place in the universe and let her tongue and mouth go wild for several minutes.

“Oh, fuck yeah” Ashlyn moaned as all of the intense and delicious sensations swept over her. 

They had both already come once and then decided to try for a little more that night. It was the Tuesday of Thanksgiving week and Ali had taken the next day off to help Sydney get ready to host her first big Dwyer/Krieger Thanksgiving. Sandi Leroux was going to help too and everybody told the coach just to relax about everything. Nobody expected high tea and fine china. It was just another big, loud, kid-friendly day spent with family and friends. Tammye and Carol were flying in Wednesday morning and all of the grandkids were excited to see them and spend 12 days with them. This was the last night without houseguests and Ali and Ashlyn had decided to try and make the most of it. They had done their fast and furious first orgasms, very successfully. And then Ashlyn had gotten out the satin restraints and tied her beautiful brunette up to the bed, spread-eagled and waiting for more. They had both learned to appreciate tying each other up more and more. Neither of them enjoyed a lot of teasing, they still weren’t good at making each other wait, but there was something about seeing the sexiest woman alive tied up that really got both of them going. They didn’t do it too often, just every once in a while to spice things up a bit. It had certainly worked that Tuesday night because Ali was eating her wife out like she had been starved for months and was just enjoying her first meal.

“Mmmmmmmmm...” the brunette kept moaning into her wife’s soaked folds and sending vibrations right to her clit and up into the rest of her body. She dug her short nails into Ashlyn’s ass as she thrusted her tongue deep into her core and swirled it around and around again. “Fuck you taste so good” she gasped out when she came up for air. “You make me so crazy babe...”

Ashlyn had been working up both of her own nipples with her hands, able to relax more now that Ali had control of her hands again. She didn’t have to worry about keeping her weight off of the brunette’s face, she could trust Ali to do it so she could just let go and enjoy the ride. The truth was, she had been very close to having an orgasm before she even got up there to the head of the bed. The only reason she hadn’t come yet is because they had both purposefully avoided her throbbing clit. Ali wanted to spend some time with her face between her keeper’s legs and Ashlyn certainly wasn’t going to deny her. But she could only hold off for so long. She was only human after all.

“Shit baby, mmmmmmm...Goddamn that feels sooooo good” Ashlyn moaned out as she ground down against her wife’s chin. “Fuck...” she closed her eyes as a huge wave of pleasure coursed through her body. The keeper moved a hand down to her clit, unable to resist the pull another second. “Oh fuck...yeah baby...mmmmmmm...” she groaned as she began to rub the sensitive nub with her own fingers.

Ali watched intently, staring straight up her wife’s glorious body to her face. Ashlyn’s head was thrown back and her mouth agape as she fondled one breast and brought herself closer to her release with her fingers. The brunette focused on her pussy, licking and sucking her folds into her hot mouth and releasing them again so she could push her strong tongue deep inside. She felt Ashlyn’s silky walls starting to contract and grab at her tongue as her keeper’s fingers picked up their pace. God how the brunette loved these moments. Her senses were filled with Ashlyn, in every way possible, and it was the most incredible feeling in the world. 

“Oh my God...yes...yessssss...unnnhhhh...Aliiiiii!!!!” Ashlyn groaned and then yelled out as her orgasm hit her hard. 

She pulled her fingers away from her own clit immediately and held onto the headboard with both hands as her entire body convulsed and shook. Ali never let up, holding her securely in place with her strong arms and stroking her with her tongue through the orgasm. She kept her eyes open and watched her sexy keeper’s body flail and twitch above her, moaning into her quivering center as Ashlyn’s passion spilled out onto her tongue. The keeper finally slumped down next to her wife, lifting her leg and having to fight against Ali’s strong hold to free herself from her hungry mouth.

“Damn...baby...” she panted out as she dropped to the bed.

Ali tried to roll over and continue cleaning her up but her legs were still tied to the foot of the bed. She whined quietly, like a spoiled child who had been denied their favorite treat, but then sat up, scooted down the bed and untied herself. Ashlyn lifted her head, weakly, to see what her wife was up to. She chuckled softly as she let her head fall back onto the pillow.

“Sorry honey...”

“Don’t be” Ali replied with a smirk once she was finally free. She rolled over, moved up, and put her face back between her wife’s thighs again. “You did what I asked you to do. Now just relax and breathe while I clean you up” she grinned lasciviously up at her gorgeous keeper and winked. “And if I fall asleep down here don’t you dare wake me up” she quirked an eyebrow before putting her soft tongue to work again.

“Tell me again why we ever get out of bed?” Ashlyn asked with her own sly smile.  
 


	41. Turkey Talks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter got big and long on me....sorry about that. Lots of loose ends and things going on.

Sydney’s first Thanksgiving as hostess had been pretty successful. The truth was, everybody’s expectations were kind of low to begin with. Sydney wasn’t a very good cook and didn’t enjoy it. She threw great parties and always had, but she hadn’t done a big huge family holiday gathering before where the hostess was expected to throw a good party but conform to more than a few family or holiday traditions. She and Dom had hosted Easter brunch earlier in the year but that wasn’t the same as doing a big holiday like Thanksgiving or Christmas. Everybody brought something to brunch so there wasn’t much cooking involved for the Dwyers at all. Ali thought the whole Thanksgiving meal thing would be too restrictive for her bestie but she loved her so much for even attempting to do it. Part of her thought Sydney had done it for her own sake so the Kriegers wouldn’t have to deal with an awkward Sam & Ethan Machado situation. The brunette had told Sydney about Sam’s family’s sad Thanksgiving routine last year and she knew the coach would remember it. Ali asked her best friend if she had offered to host just for that reason and Sydney had played dumb, pretending she had forgotten all about the fact that Sam & Ethan usually spent the day alone. It just made Ali love her all the more.

And nobody expected Sydney to host a big holiday. It wasn’t like the Dwyers and Sandi didn’t pull their own weight at the Krieger gatherings. For example, last Thanksgiving when Ali and Ashlyn hosted, Sydney and Dom had bought the turkey and driven it up to the big old house earlier in the week for Ali to do her voodoo to it. And it wasn’t just a big old frozen turkey from the supermarket. They had ordered a huge bird that was organic and free-range and all of the important, expensive things everybody wanted their turkeys to be those days. Dom, in particular, felt bad about constantly mooching off of the Krieger holiday gatherings and insisted on providing as much of whatever meal was being prepared for any given holiday. They also often brought a broad offering of wines for everybody to enjoy throughout the day. Nobody cared about any of it, but in the best possible way. They were family and as long as they were there, that was all that mattered.

Sydney almost ruined the turkey but Dom and Ali saved it. She was just a mess in the kitchen, even though she tried so hard to be helpful. Finally, with all the love in her heart she could summon, Ali sent her out to make sure the kids were good and the rest of the families had everything they needed. Just like any good restaurant, they needed someone to handle the front of the house while the cooks took care of the kitchen. Can’t have one without the other and still have a successful restaurant or holiday dinner gathering. Everyone did agree that the Dwyer hosts had one thing nobody else could beat. A kickass backyard for the soccer game. The Easter game had been one of the best ever. Syd’s yard was bigger than both Ken’s or Ali’s yards and nice and flat and kind of perfect. They were hoping to put an inground swimming pool in someday and that would certainly impact the size of the ‘soccer pitch’, but for this Thanksgiving, it was still the best around.

Kyle and Nathan and Luna had come up from NYC for the weekend and were staying with the Kimballs. Their foster parent application had finally been approved and they were going to be put into the rotation right after Thanksgiving weekend. They had no control over which kids were brought to their attention, but they could say no to anybody they felt like they had to. They couldn’t pick which kids came their way, but they had veto power. The problem with that was that they knew saying no meant that the poor kid would wait longer to find a foster home. Both men were excited and nervous about the new turn their lives were taking. The Kimballs also made the short trip down to Lynnfield for the day and were starting to feel more comfortable at the Krieger family gatherings too. Jared Kimball was at Thanksgiving too, with his boyfriend of just over a year. It had been interesting to watch Jared grow and change over the eight years Ali and Ashlyn had known and worked with him. He had always been skittish about dating. He almost viewed it as a waste of time because he was sure he would never find a guy he liked enough who might actually like him back. So it became a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy. But gradually, especially over the past three years, Jared had become more confident and more willing to put himself out there. He turned 29 in 2025 and wasn’t getting any younger. He understood that and seemed to be making more of an effort. This latest, and longest, relationship was a great example.

Tanner was away, travelling with the Revs for their game on the west coast on Saturday but Koty and Brianna were there. The young couple was always happiest at Krieger gatherings and avoided her family as much as possible. The whole thing still made Ken and Vicki nervous as hell, but it seemed like Brianna was standing by Koty through all of it. She even told one of her brothers off at a family event over the summer when he had gotten obnoxious with Koty and his drinking problems. They left immediately after Brianna reminded them all again that she would leave them all behind in a heartbeat if they didn’t treat her husband the way he deserved to be treated. They hadn’t been back since.

Whitney, Ryan and Becca were spending their first Thanksgiving together down on Long Island with Ryan’s family. Becca was 8-months old and all three of them were doing well. Mom and Dad were just exhausted all the time but they had been warned about that by everybody in their lives. It didn’t make it any easier though. Whitney hadn’t wanted to make the trip to Long Island but Ryan had very wisely reminded her that if they travelled for Thanksgiving then no-one would expect them to go anywhere for Christmas. Whitney’s parents were already making plans to fly out for a real New England Christmas with their only grandchild.

Tammye and Carol were their usual warm and helpful selves and everybody could honestly say they enjoyed their company. Kyle described them once as being almost milquetoast and boring and that’s why everybody liked them. There was barely anything there not to like. He hadn’t meant to be cruel in his assessment. He had shared his thoughts when it was just he and Ali and their spouses a couple of years earlier. The realization had just come to him and he had blurted it out without meaning any harm. He really did like both women very much. Ashlyn had defended them by saying that they both had lived challenging enough lives before they met and settled down. She didn’t think either of them would trade their boring domesticity for anything in the world.

Erica and her 3-1/2 year old daughter Maisy also joined the festivities this Thanksgiving day. She usually spent holidays with her sister’s family but they had taken a mini-vacation around her sister’s husband’s business trip and weren’t around that weekend. Liz had invited her to her family gathering too, but Erica opted for spending the day with Sydney and Ali and their kids. Liz completely understood and appreciated the invitation that she had received as well. She and Erica made plans for the weekend instead and everybody was happy.

“Just don’t bring it up, ok everybody?” Ali had warned the family that had already gathered at the Dwyer household Thanksgiving day. “If she wants to talk about it she’ll bring it up. Otherwise just leave it alone.”

“You’re the one who can’t stop blurting out how mad you are at Tom” Ashlyn challenged her wife playfully. “We should take bets to see how long you can go without telling her what a jackass Tom is...”

Ali spun around to face her wife and Ashlyn’s mouth went dry when she saw the stern look there. She had only been joking but apparently the brunette was really worried about Erica feeling at ease that day.

“I’m not kidding” Ali spoke again, to everyone. “She almost didn’t come today because she feels self-conscious and embarrassed about everything. So please, just be nice.”

“Or we will end you” Sydney made her own threatening face and stood next to her best friend in solidarity.

Deb and Mike Christopher were there, having spent the whole month of November in their Manchester condo doing all sorts of fun Fall New England activities. Mike’s son Donnie had brought his girlfriend up for the long Veteran’s Day weekend and they had all gone up to New Hampshire for some leaf-peeping. It was late in the season so they didn’t go very far North, but they found some beautiful foliage to show the southerners on their first visit to New England. Deb took her cues from her friend Sandi on Thanksgiving. Both of the older women wanted to let Sydney try it on her own but knew she’d need help. The last thing they wanted to do was butt in and force their assistance on her. There were a couple of times during the day that Sydney let the pressure and disappointment get to her. She surprised even herself at how maturely she handled it though. She would just pick up 20-month old Maddox and bring him upstairs to change his diaper or something like that. During one of these trips, Deb followed her up the stairs and gave her a big hug from behind as she stood at the changing table.

“I’m sorry today sucks Momma D” the coach’s voice was sad and low as she started to take her son’s pants off.

“He doesn’t really need his diaper changed, does he?” Deb asked with a chuckle, still with her arms wrapped around Sydney from behind.

“No.”

“Well, I won’t tell so why don’t you save a diaper” she giggled softly and let Sydney put Maddox on the nursery floor where he promptly crawled over to some toys and started playing.

Sydney looked into one of the kindest faces she had ever known in her life and slumped her shoulders.

“Listen, not everybody is good at everything. You know that. We all know that. And nobody expects it to happen” Deb took the coach’s hands in hers and squeezed them. “Today is wonderful Sydney Rae. Absolutely wonderful and you’re doing a terrific job hosting.”

Sydney lifted her eyes and gave Deb a skeptical look.

“I mean it. I’m not just saying that” Deb assured her with a warm smile and another squeeze. “Would I hire you to cook my turkey? No” she shrugged. “Cooking is not your thing and it never has been. So why does it matter today?”

“It’s Thanksgiving and I wanted everybody to like the turkey and the meal...” Sydney whined softly, dropping her eyes again.

“And everybody did” Deb lifted her chin and looked into her deep brown eyes. “Really, it was all very good honey. I think you’re too wrapped up in it to see it the way the rest of us do. Dinner was delicious.” She paused and squinted a little bit at her daughter’s best friend before continuing. “The only thing wrong with today is that we miss you. We don’t want some Betty Crocker version of Sydney Rae Leroux Dwyer. We want the real thing. We want the one who laughs louder and faster than anybody else in the room. The one who never takes anything too seriously until there’s actual bloodshed. The one who is good and kind and loyal and awesome. The one who is one of the best little mothers I’ve ever known...”

“Alright, alright” Sydney rolled her eyes and lifted her chin out of Deb’s hand. “It’s not my funeral. You don’t have to practice your eulogy...”

“There she is...” Deb grinned and laughed as she pulled her into a hug. “Just do me a favor and go down there and relax and have fun. You’ve worked your butt off today and worried enough for three holidays. You’ve earned a little fun time.”

“Thanks Momma D” the coach kissed her cheek and then picked up her son.

“No, just go on now and do something fun for the next hour. I’ve got him” Deb took the toddler from her arms and kissed his fat little cheek. “I need some of this sweet boy right here.”

“Thanks for the pep talk” Sydney turned at the door and looked shyly at the older woman. “You’ve always had my back... ever since I can remember.”

“And I always will honey.”

Both Deb and Sandi had one on one conversations with Erica that afternoon too. They had known the girl since their daughters had all become friends in middle school. Erica didn’t bring up Tom or the divorce that day but that didn’t stop both Deb and Sandi from taking a quiet moment just to tell her that they loved her and were always around if she needed them for anything. Kyle had done the same thing in his own teasing way. He had always liked Erica a lot. Before he was sure he was gay he kind of had a crush on her. He never said or did anything about it but he knew that Ali suspected. His sister never challenged him on it though, somehow knowing it would never happen anyway. She may not have understood, in her 12-year old brain, that her brother was gay, but she knew he wasn’t going to start dating girls either. It just wouldn’t have made sense for him to do that. Kyle had always taken time to talk with Erica whenever they had attended the same events over the years. He had sent her a congratulatory card celebrating her wedding as well as a sweet card, and gift card, when Maisy had been born.

“Oh geez, if this isn’t trouble I don’t know what is” Ali shook her head and grinned when she found her brother and Erica sitting side by side on Cash’s bed, Maisy fast asleep on Kyle’s lap. The little girl was almost done with naps but that day had been so busy and exciting and full of boisterous children that she was exhausted and couldn’t keep her little eyes open another minute. Ali kept her voice quiet so she didn’t disturb the girl. “Is he giving you a hard time?” she winked at Erica and carefully sat down on the edge of the bed next to her.

“No” she smiled back at the brunette. “We’re just talking. He’s been telling me about becoming a foster parent” she patted his thigh, careful not to disturb her daughter’s head.

“And she said the nicest things to me” Kyle smiled and Ali could tell that he had been really moved by whatever Erica had said to him.

“Did you tell her how you had a crush on her in 8th grade?” Ali teased and quirked an eyebrow at him.

Kyle took a big, loud, gasping breath as his eyes went wide and his face got red. Erica started giggling at the exchange and looked cautiously at Ali to see if she was kidding or not.

“You’re serious?” she asked the brunette, her own mouth slightly agape in surprise.

“Don’t you dare...” Kyle’s voice was higher than usual, even though he was trying to be serious and threatening. He was completely flustered and pretty adorable.

“I am” Ali confessed and made an eek face at her brother who closed his eyes and let his chin drop to his chest in embarrassment. “Oh relax, it was almost thirty years ago. She knows you’re gay and probably did back then too” Ali giggled quietly.

“Aw, I think it’s sweet and I’m totally flattered” Erica said kindly, patting his leg again and turning her head to look at him. “Seriously Kyle. Even all these years later it’s always nice to hear that somebody got you way back then. Middle school was not my finest hour” she chuckled as she remembered the growth spurt that made her almost a foot taller than everybody else for a couple of awkward years. 

“Oh, you were great” Kyle lifted his face, still red, and complimented her. “Just because none of the dumb straight boys could appreciate you didn’t mean you weren’t a real catch.”

“I know you’re married and gay, but...will you be my boyfriend?” Erica joked lightly and leaned her head against his strong shoulder.

“Yes, anytime. Nate’s good about that. He’ll understand” he nodded, turned and kissed the side of Erica’s head softly. “And listen, I know you don’t want to talk about it and I totally get that...” he paused for a millisecond and glanced at his sister who was smiling at them both. “But if you ever need someone to remind you what a catch you are while you’re going through all of this...hard stuff, you just call me up. I’ll tell you all the things I’ve liked about you all these years. Ok?”

“Ok” she answered softly as she reached her other arm out to take Ali’s hand. “You guys are just the best. Thank you for making me come today Als. I really didn’t want to...”

“She can be a pushy little bitch sometimes can’t she?” Kyle chuckled and winked at his sister.

“Hey!” Ali feigned offense and squeezed Erica’s hand. “I’m glad you’re here E. Both Syd and I want to do anything we possibly can to help. Please let us help.”

“We’ll see” Erica smiled warmly at her friend and then turned her head to look at Kyle. “And you...you are just too sweet” she grinned up at him. “Thank you for being a wonderful man. It’s been easy to forget that there are still some of you out there so this reminder is really good.”

“Oh please don’t make his head any bigger with your compliments” Nathan spoke quietly as he leaned against the door frame. “It barely fits through the doors as it is now.”

They all laughed and spent another fifteen minutes talking together before Sydney called everybody down for dessert. As they stood up, leaving Maisy to nap a little longer on Cash’s bed, Erica pulled Ali into a big hug. 

“I...I’m definitely gonna need your help” she finally choked out. “I just have no idea how yet.”

“That’s ok” Ali rubbed her back as they continued the hug. “Just promise me you’ll remember that I’m here and that you’re not alone and you never will be. Ok?”

“Ok, I promise” Erica took a deep breath and got her emotions back under control.

Ali waited for her and, a minute later, they walked down the stairs arm-in-arm to join the rest of the crew who was already digging into four different kinds of pies. 

“Happy Thanksgiving Ali.”

“You too E.”

//

“Alright ladies, well that was very good work” Mattie praised Ali and Ashlyn after guiding them through a lengthy discussion about the whole Sam Machado situation. It was the week before Thanksgiving and they had started their first joint session in months by talking about the ovarian cancer scare that hung over their heads and then moved right along to Sam. “These are some really big issues and I’m proud of you both for coming in and talking about them with me.”

Ali had gone in and met with Mattie to talk about the ovarian cancer stuff earlier in the year. And Ashlyn had met with her a couple of times to talk about both subjects. But they hadn’t been to see her together in a long time. They weren’t avoiding it or anything. It was just that life was busy and they felt like they were handling everything pretty well themselves. The brunette had broken down in tears this session as they talked about Sam’s unwanted advances and the way she had handled the first one in particular. It broke her heart to hear Ashlyn talk about how much it hurt that she hadn’t trusted her with the truth right after the kiss at the holiday concert. And even though the keeper had added that she understood Ali’s reasoning behind her decision to keep it from her, Ali knew she had wounded her wife deeply. She had made that decision, not Sam. Yes, it was his fault that the kiss had happened, but it was Ali’s decision not to trust Ashlyn with it that hurt the most.

“I know why you did it Al” the blonde had turned to face her wife and held her hand. “I don’t like it, but I understand why you felt like it was the right thing to do.”

“You do? Really?” Ali’s voice was small and almost fearful as she searched her wife’s face for the truth.

“Al I know how you think...at least some of the time. You were just trying to spare me the mess of dealing with it. Especially because you weren’t sure if he even realized what he had done” she explained carefully, wanting to make sure Ali heard her loud and clear this time. “I get it. I wish you had told me and I always want you to be honest with me, especially if it’s something that’s bothering you like this must have. It’s sort of like when you postponed the honeymoon...your heart was in the right place but you didn’t handle it the best way.”

“Ugh...” the brunette dropped her head and groaned. “God, I swore I’d never make that mistake again...” she closed her eyes and grimaced at the memory.

“Well, newsflash hon, you’re human” Ashlyn teased lightly and squeezed her hand. “Now will you please believe me so we can put this behind us? I don’t want to give him any more of us or our time.”

“Yeah, ok, you’re right” Ali nodded quickly and sat up straighter. “You believe me that I didn’t want any of that mess and I believe you that you forgive me for not telling you about it right away.” She exhaled loudly and locked eyes with her beautiful keeper. “I’m ready to put it behind us. I love you Ashlyn.”

Mattie had asked them both a few follow up questions and then praised them for their hard work and thanked them for coming in to talk with her about the two really big subjects.

“We have a few more minutes” the therapist glanced at her watch. “Is there anything else you’d like to talk about?” she looked from one woman to the other and knew immediately that Ali was worried about something with Ashlyn. “Ashlyn, is there something else bothering you? Now might be a good time to share it with Ali and maybe we can help figure it out together.”

Ali let out a small sigh of relief and turned her attention back to her wife. She moved her thumb across the back of Ashlyn’s hand slowly and steadily as she studied the side of her face.

“Babe, I know something’s wrong and I really wish you’d tell me what you’re feeling...”

“God, you guys are tough” Ashlyn blew a breath out and closed her eyes. She pulled her hand back from Ali’s and ran it through her short hair as she tried to summon the strength to talk about something she didn’t feel quite ready to talk about yet. “I’m still working it out for myself” she finally said with a little bit of bite.

“If you’re not ready to talk about it I understand” Ali offered her a way out. “It’s just...well, I worry and it’s hard for me to be patient sometimes...I’m sorry honey.”

“There have been some big issues thrown your way this year Ashlyn, and you as well Ali” Mattie tried to intercede and nudge the keeper along. “It’s natural for you to worry about how each other might be handling everything...”

“I feel old and I feel scared about how fast my life is going by and Drew lost his first tooth and the kids are going to all be out of diapers soon and I don’t have time to work out as much as I used to and what if something happens to me and I can’t take care of my family and my knee is fucking killing me and my back hurts more often than not and every time one of my fingers hurts I’m terrified I’m getting the osteoarthritis I’m going to inherit from my mom and if I can’t use my hands...” she took a big breath after rattling off all of the thoughts that had been taking up so much space in her head over the past couple of months. The room was quiet for a full minute as Ashlyn tried to catch her breath. “Oh fuck...” she whimpered just before bursting into tears and burying her face in her hands.

Ali started to reach for her wife but Mattie looked her off with a slight shake of her head. They just sat there and let the blonde cry for a couple of minutes before the therapist finally spoke again.

“That was very good Ashlyn. You did a great job letting us know what you’re feeling and struggling with. Thank you.” The therapist paused and then continued, leaning forward to touch the keeper’s knee. She patted it twice and then leaned back. Her voice was soft and steady. “Is there anything else?”

“No” Ashlyn sniffled, blew her nose and wiped the tears off of her face with a sigh. “That’s pretty much it. Except that sometimes I make a list of all the things I won’t be able to do when my fingers get all fucked up like my mom’s.”

“Oh sweetheart” Ali couldn’t wait any longer so she rubbed her wife’s back, moving her hand in slow, soothing circles.

“Well, you’ve given us a good deal of feelings to work with and I think, once you’re able to look at it a little more objectively, you’ll see that there’s nothing there that you can’t handle” Mattie stated matter-of-factly and nodded at the blonde.

“Yeah?” Ashlyn asked in a small voice as she met her therapist’s eyes.

“Yeah” Mattie smiled. “You turned 40 last month and that’s a powerful milestone for most people. I think, from some of our other discussions, that you’ve been struggling with that for a while now. Is that a fair assessment?”

“Um, yeah, definitely” Ashlyn nodded and sat back against the couch. She caught Ali’s hand before she could pull it all the way back and held it in her own hand. She smiled sheepishly at the brunette and dropped her eyes. “I’m sorry I’m such a mess baby.”

“You’re not a mess Ash” Ali scooted closer and kissed her wife’s cheek. “You’re perfect. I wouldn’t change a thing. And you’ll figure this out too. You don’t have to do it alone, if you don’t want to. You don’t have to have it all worked out already before you tell me about it. I’ll help you if you want help or I’ll leave you alone about it if you need that instead. Whatever it takes babe.”

“Thanks” the keeper gave her wife a tentative smile.

“We worked on this earlier this summer Ashlyn” the therapist tried to get back on track in the few minutes they had left in this session. “What’s changed since then? What’s different that has made this aging issue come back to the forefront?”

“I don’t know” the keeper wracked her brain trying to think what the answer could be. “I was doing ok at the end of September and then October was really good...”

“Your knee” Ali spoke quietly, almost to herself, as she worked her mind through the problem in front of them.

“What?” Ashlyn looked at her and tilted her head.

“Oh, um...” the brunette felt bad for butting in and hadn’t really meant to say the words out loud. “I was just thinking that your knee started bothering you.”

All three women were quiet and Ali caught the disappointment on Mattie’s face when she glanced her way. The therapist hated when her patients didn’t do the work themselves. The keeper was thinking hard about what her wife had just said and was oblivious to Mattie’s look. Ali tried her best to look contrite and apologetic.

“That’s it” Ashlyn leaned forward and furrowed her brow, deep in thought. “My knee...you’re right” she looked quickly at her beautiful brunette. “I tweaked my knee during Championship week” she rolled her eyes as she addressed Mattie, “playing a pick up game with some other decrepit ex-players” she chuckled and then groaned. “Anyway, it bothered me for a couple of weeks and then somebody smart made me go get it looked at” she nodded towards Ali but didn’t take her eyes off of the therapist. “The truth is I was afraid to go because I didn’t want to hear that something was wrong with it” she sighed heavily. “But we went and it wasn’t so bad.”

“She’s having her knee scoped in two weeks and, hopefully, that’ll be it and her knee will feel better in a month or so after that” Ali offered helpfully.

“So nothing major, nothing too serious?” Mattie questioned, looking at both women.

“No, looks like just some cartilage to clean up” Ashlyn answered. “Nothing bad at all. But I was freaked out about it and I’ll bet that was the straw that broke the camel’s back.”

“It very well could be” Mattie pursed her lips. “You were worried about your knee for several weeks at the end of October...that works with the timeline” she nodded. 

“Then when Drew lost his first baby tooth, that’s when it got really hard to handle” the keeper admitted. “I just couldn’t stop thinking about all of it. Turning 40, the kids getting so much bigger, my ailments, my rickety old body starting to fall apart on me, it just all piled up and got really heavy.”

“Honey, why didn’t you tell me you were worried about all of that?” Ali asked carefully, not wanting to make it worse now that they seemed to have figured it out.

“Well, it’s hard for me to know when something’s getting too big for me to handle on my own” she shrugged and turned to face her wife. “Sometimes I can feel it and I’ll talk to you about stuff but other times it sneaks up on me. Before I know it I’m really struggling.”

“That’s an excellent explanation Ashlyn” Mattie offered. “Does that make sense to you Ali?”

“Yes, it does” she smiled softly at her wife. 

“Good. Well, that’s all we have time for today but you’ve both done a terrific job. Thank you for doing the work ladies. Ashlyn, I’d like to pick up on this at our next appointment, would that be alright with you?”

“Sure thing doc. I’ll keep working on it in the meantime.”

“I know you will” Mattie smiled at both women. “Remember to keep the basics in mind, both of you. Keep talking. I know it’s hard to find the time but that makes it all the more important. You guys have such a strong foundation that if you keep doing those basics you’ll be able to handle almost anything. And you’ve proven that this year. I’m really proud of both of you.”

“Thanks Mattie” Ali gave her a smile as they all stood up. 

“See you in a couple of weeks” Ashlyn added as they moved towards the door.

//

The day before Thanksgiving was a short, half-day of school for Drew’s class. The elementary school took advantage of the Thanksgiving holiday break to try and check in with the parents of their first grade students. They were going to be in the school for six years if they attended the kindergarten program at the school too, and the principal wanted to start the new parents off on the right foot and make sure everyone felt comfortable with the school and the teachers and the administrators. What it meant was that Drew’s class of 24 first-graders ‘made lunch’ for their parents and then waited on them like the most adorable little waitstaff in the world as they ate. The parents were told to look for their names and Ali and Ashlyn found their hand-made name cards marking their places and sat at one of the cafeteria tables on the right half of the large room. The other first-grade class was doing the same thing on the left half of the room. Drew was looking cute and confident as he carefully carried over two plastic cups of water for his moms.

“Nice job buddy” Ashlyn encouraged him with a wink as he scampered back to his teacher and the two aides who were trying to orchestrate everything.

Ali grinned at her wife after taking a couple of pictures of the excited boy with her phone. When she turned her head back to look at the rest of the room her heart stopped as she saw Sam and an attractive blonde woman walking their way. What Ali and Ashlyn didn’t know was that the seating had been done alphabetically so they found themselves sitting at an 8-person table with the LaRosas, the McAdoos and Sam fucking Machado and his new girlfriend. Ali put a smile on her face and dug her nails into her wife’s thigh under the table as Sam stood behind the seats with his name and gave the Kriegers a nervous look.

“Hey Sam” Ashlyn waved at him with a small smile.

“Hi guys” he replied nervously but managed a smile too. “Umm, these are ours...” he nodded down at the name plates directly across from Ali and Ashlyn.

“Well then you’ve found the right place I guess” the keeper replied evenly as she realized what was happening.

Sam introduced the whole table to Lisa, his girlfriend who was visiting from Chicago for Thanksgiving. Neither the LaRosas nor the McAdoos had any idea what had gone on between Sam and the Kriegers almost a year ago. The four couples made easy conversation throughout the hour-long mealtime, readily telling stories about their six-year olds. Once Sam relaxed a little bit he looked pretty happy. It was his bad luck to be sitting right across from Ashlyn though so he never truly felt at ease. Lisa was lovely and very sociable. She talked to all three couples the same way and for about the same amount of time. She was average height and medium build with a pretty face and shoulder-length straight blonde hair. She was friendly and well-spoken and, if the circumstances had been different, both Ali and Ashlyn would have liked her very much. Drew and Ethan were thrilled that their parents were sitting at the same table and did all of their waiting on the table in tandem. It was pretty freaking cute and none of the uncomfortable adults could deny it. Towards the end of the meal, as they were enjoying their pudding and jello, Sam cleared his throat and spoke in a quiet but clear voice.

“So there’s never going to be a good time to do this so I’m just going to do it now” he glanced quickly at his girlfriend who seemed to know what he was up to because she nodded her head encouragingly. 

Both Ali and Ashlyn felt the color drain from their faces as they sat there and wondered what the hell else could make the situation any more awkward than it already was. The keeper put her spork down as she swallowed the cherry jello in her mouth and sat up a little straighter. The LaRosas had already left and the McAdoos were in the process of talking to the teachers on their way out.

“Lisa knows everything” he looked to his left again and smiled softly at his girlfriend as he continued. “And she’s been asking me questions this year, well, since this summer anyway, about why I...did what I did” he looked down and blushed a little as he paused for a second. “Specifically why I kissed you” he looked right at Ali, “even after you told me you didn’t want that.”

“You told her about that day in the kitchen?” Ashlyn asked, her eyebrows raised in surprise as she looked from Sam to Lisa and back again.

“He did. It took a lot of time and a lot of trust” Lisa reached over and held his hand. “And it really bothered me...”

“Well that’s good to hear” the keeper’s eyes were wide.

“I know you’re probably wondering what I’m doing with him right now” she met Ashlyn’s gaze and didn’t flinch. “Sam didn’t understand how wrong that was of him to...”

“No, let me” he interrupted. “I never meant to hurt you Ali. I know I told you that the same day and I meant it then too. But it was only after talking with Lisa and listening to her thoughts on it that I understood how wrong it was of me to...force myself on you like that” he was looking directly at Ali and the brunette met his eyes and didn’t look away. “It sounds silly or like a stupid excuse, but I swear, I just...I just got lost in the moment and I literally lost my mind for a minute. I’m so sorry Ali. I just really want you to know that I would never have hurt you.”

Ashlyn opened her mouth to reply but it was Ali’s voice that came first.

“And you believe him?” she addressed Lisa, not Sam. “You believe that he’s a good man who didn’t mean any harm?”

Lisa’s voice was just as clear as Sam’s had been and she squeezed his hand and glanced at him before replying.

“I do. Nothing about that day in your kitchen sounds anything like the Sam I’ve known for almost ten years. I was in his wedding, one of Maggie’s bridesmaids, and he’s always been one of the best guys. We were all so happy Maggie had found somebody we thought was good enough for her” she paused and looked down for a few seconds. “And I know he’s a good man. I know him and I love him and if I thought there was any way he could ever hurt me, or anybody else for that matter, I wouldn’t be here. And from what he’s told me, you both know him too. And, aside from those fifteen minutes in your kitchen that day, he’s been the good man that he’s always been. Ethan’s a good kid, in large part, because Sam’s a good dad and a good man. Just from the short time we’ve spent together today, it’s easy for me to see why you all became friends.” She waited for several seconds. “I hope that answers your question.”

“It does. And I believe him too” Ali looked at Lisa and then Sam and then Ashlyn. “There’s no excuse for what he did...”

“God, I know” Sam shook his head and looked distressed for the first time during their conversation. “I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.”

“This all sounds really good” Ashlyn finally spoke, her voice harder than everybody else’s. “And I hope it’s true, I really do. But I’ve gotta tell you” she shook her head and set her jaw, “what I saw that day in the kitchen didn’t look anything like a good guy to me.”

“Ash...”

“No, Ali, let her talk” Sam interrupted the brunette and met the keeper’s fiery stare.

“There’s not much to say Sam. You went from being one of my favorite people from school to somebody I have to remind myself not to punch in the face every time I see you. And the worst part is...” she looked down and felt her emotions starting to rise up, “I liked you so much. I trusted you with my family, with our family” she looked at Ali before continuing. “I’m glad you guys are happy together and I wish you well. But I don’t know what you want from me, from us.”

“I don’t want anything from you Ash. You’re right, I broke that trust and I threw our friendship away. I was an idiot and I’d give just about anything to go back and fix it. But I can’t. All I can do is keep being the guy I was before I screwed up and hope that’s good enough for Lisa and for Ethan. And the only reason I brought this whole thing up today is because we’re all four here together now and who knows when that’ll happen again, at least without kids all over us” he smiled without meaning to, but then changed back to his serious tone and demeanor. “I wanted to apologize to you both again, especially after I finally understood how terribly I treated Ali that day. I’m really sorry.” He waited for a few seconds before finishing what sounded like a defendant’s testimony in a courtroom. “If you guys can still be ok with Ethan and Drew staying friends that would be incredible. But I know I don’t have the right to ask for that.”

“Well we’re not doing it for you, we’re doing it for the boys” Ashlyn answered with more bite than she intended. She heard how harsh it sounded and regretted it immediately. She was mad but not about the boys. “We’re very happy that they’re friends. We both love Ethan” she looked over at Ali who nodded in agreement and smiled at her keeper. “He’s always welcome in our house, anytime.”

The boys ran over to the end of the table right at that moment, breaking the tense mood with their exuberant little bodies jumping up and down.

“Mama, you didn’t finish your jello?” Drew frowned when he looked at Ashlyn’s bowl. “I made sure it was the red kind.”

“Well who said I was finished yet?” she teased him as she picked up her spork again and put it back into the jello. “You want a bite?”

The rest of the twenty minutes the two couples spent together went by quickly and with one or the other of the boys present the whole time, which made them all happy and relieved. When Ali and Ashlyn finally had a chance to talk about it later that night they both agreed that it had been brave of Sam to bring up the touchy subject again and admirable that he had confessed everything to Lisa in the first place. After going back and forth about the wisdom of Lisa deciding to date him after finding out about his bad behavior, they decided that she was smart enough to know what she was doing. 

“I really liked her” Ali admitted as they settled into bed. “I didn’t want to, but she seems great.”

“Yeah, me too. Maybe now we won’t have to feel so sorry for him anymore” Ashlyn suggested hopefully. “I’d like to just hate him without all these conflicting feelings of sympathy that keep fucking it up for me.”

“You don’t really hate him do you?” the brunette’s voice was quiet and concerned.

“No” Ashlyn sighed loudly as she pulled the covers up over them both. “But I wish I did. It would be so much easier.”

//

The actual knee scope, or arthroscopic surgery as it was formally called, took place the Tuesday after Thanksgiving. It was done as an outpatient procedure and it only took about an hour for them to complete it. It was a very similar procedure to what Ashlyn had had done on her right shoulder back in early 2016. The surgeon would go into her knee, through three or four small incisions, and insert a camera so they could take a look around inside and see what needed to be done. They were expecting to remove a bunch of loose cartilage and bone fragments that were gumming up the works inside Ashlyn’s right knee. It was a result of normal wear and tear from her demanding athletic career, as well as from the car accident four years ago. The impact of the car slamming into her right leg had created some extra pressure and inflammation inside her knee joint and that had caused more of the friction that resulted in the fragments floating around in there. Once the tiny bits of cartilage and bone were removed her knee would work better and she would have better range of motion as well as much less pain in the entire joint area. There was always the chance that the surgeon might see something else while doing the scope. There might be a small tear to her meniscus or some other damage to the ACL or MCL or patellar tendon. It was a lot like opening up the wall of an old house to do some repairs. You never really knew what you were going to see once you got inside. Ashlyn had completely torn the ACL/MCL and meniscus in both knees before and she knew what that felt like. She really didn’t think that’s what was going on. For all she knew, when she tweaked her knee back in October one of the pieces of cartilage or bone moved a little bit and the new location was much more painful than the previous spot had been. She liked that scenario and was sticking to it until her surgeon told her otherwise.

Luckily for the keeper, she had been right. It was just clean up work and nothing more serious. They removed quite a bit of ‘debris’ as the surgeon called it and Ashlyn was hopeful that her knee would eventually feel much better again. Unfortunately for the blonde, just like with her shoulder clean up, they had to make four incisions instead of just the typical three. The surgeon explained that there had been some bits that they just couldn’t reach without making a fourth cut. The upside was a more thorough and successful surgery and scope. The downside was that the recovery would be more painful and take a little bit longer. She had to go back for the first post-operative check a week later and then, if things were going well, the final post-op appointment a month after that. Full recovery could take 4-6 weeks or even longer, depending on how the individual knee responded. Everybody was different. Some people bounced back faster and the swelling and pain in their knee disappeared right at 4 weeks. Others took the full 6 weeks before their knee felt like a knee again. Still others needed even more time than that. Ashlyn had done these sorts of things before and, typically, she was a good healer and fast recuperator. She put the work in, did the therapy and rehab, and followed all the rules. She didn’t cut corners during the recovery stage because she knew that was the most important part, assuming you had a good surgeon who didn’t mess up the actual scope.

She used the same orthopedic surgeon she had used, through the Breakers, for her shoulder surgery almost ten years earlier. She was still technically a Breakers employee so she had access to the medical staff there and was happy for the continuity when it came to this sort of orthopedic procedure. Ashlyn knew she was lucky to live in one of the epicenters of medical teaching and expertise in the world. But she felt better going with the people she knew and trusted. Ali drove her home later that afternoon with a prescription for painkillers, a cane and a big bandage on her knee to help with all the draining that her knee would be doing for the next couple of days. Ashlyn would need to elevate and ice her knee for the first two days while it drained and started to heal. No showering for three days and no baths or submerging the knee for two weeks. Her rehab would start after her first post-op appointment 7 days later. Until then she was just supposed to be nice to her knee and let it rest and recuperate.

Tammye and Carol were staying at the big old house through that next week and were most helpful with the kids while Ali took care of her keeper. The brunette worked mornings, after taking the kids to school and daycare, and then left the office earlier than usual to make sure she would be back in Gloucester in time to pick up Josie at 1:30pm and then Drew at 2:30pm. That left Ashlyn in the care of her mom for the first week of her recovery, until Ali came home and then the Grandmas spent time with the kids. That week was a lot of fun for everybody, except for Ashlyn’s knee. The keeper hadn’t planned her knee surgery to coincide with her mom’s visit, but she was really happy that it had. Tammye and Carol helped the kids decorate the house for Christmas, with guidance from Ali. They went and got the tree and set it up in the family room by the side door where it always stood. When Carol found out how much Josie was loving the piano she bought a book of holiday sheet music for 20 different Christmas carols and showed Josie how to play them on the piano. She couldn’t play the piano or any instruments but she had been a member of the prestigious chamber singers when she was in college so she knew how to read music. Carol sat at the piano with the little red head, and often Ali or Ashlyn who both really wanted to learn how to read music, and plinked out the notes to some of their favorite holiday songs. 

Ashlyn moved her appointment with Mattie to the following week when she was more mobile but could already tell that she was feeling better about things. The fear of the knee “injury” and all of the things it could have been had definitely triggered some sort of anxiety in the keeper. She and Ali were both hoping that once her knee started to feel better it would help her work through her aging issues faster. Ali was right there with the TLC for her wife, happy to help with anything she needed. One of the things Ashlyn was encouraged to do to help reduce the formation of scar tissue inside the knee was a patellar massage and it totally skeeved her out to do it. Thankfully, her wife was a world-class caregiver by that point and was able to move Ashlyn’s knee cap up, down, left and right twice a day for her. 

“Oh come on you big baby” the brunette teased her wife as she continued to push and hold her kneecap to one side for 15 seconds. “It doesn’t even hurt you, it just freaks you out” she chuckled and then gently moved the kneecap in the opposite direction and held it for another 15 seconds.

“It’s just gross. Why does it move around like that in the first place? Blech” Ashlyn made a disgusted face as she watched Ali’s fingers work on her kneecap.

“Just think about something else” Ali instructed as she knelt on the bed straddling her wife’s lower legs as she lay there grimacing at the way her knee cap moved around underneath her skin. “Take your mind off of it because I’ve got three more reps to go.”

Ali was all ready for bed, wearing her glasses and her pajamas. As she knelt on either side of Ashlyn’s shins, she bent over to perform the simple massage and the keeper could see down the front of her sleep tank. That would always do the trick and Ashlyn chuckled at the thought.

“Well, if you changed your position around and brought that sexy ass up here that would definitely keep my mind off of my knee” she wagged her eyebrows and smirked at Ali.

“You and that one-track mind of yours” the brunette chuckled and smiled, always pleased that her wife loved her body so much. 

“Hey, what can I say? It’s a beautiful track” the keeper flirted. “Come on, help me nurse Ali...please?”

Ali originally had no intention of taking the time to move up to her wife’s lap and basically stick her ass in her face while she continued the patellar massage. But when she heard the pleading in her wife’s voice and saw the eager look in her beautiful hazel eyes she found herself caving, as usual.

“You are unbelievable. I can’t believe I’m even doing this. You’re as bad as one of the kids...” Ali complained playfully as she spun herself around 180 degrees so that her ass was up by Ashlyn’s chest. She leaned on her elbows by her wife’s knees and kept working on her kneecap, chuckling to herself as she did so. “You’re welcome” she quipped with a teasing bite in her voice.

“Oh, yeah, thank you very much baby. This is perfect” Ashlyn giggled. “I am officially distracted and I’ll probably be drooling in another minute” she joked as she ran both hands across her wife’s ass, right in front of her. The snowman-themed cotton pajama pants moved slightly with her hands and Ashlyn leaned her head up and pressed a soft kiss to one of the cheeks. “One kiss per snowman, that’s the payment for being so sweet to me honey” she patted Ali’s thigh and kissed another snowman on her ass. “So many snowmen...” another kiss, “this could take a while...” she grinned into the next kiss and made her wife laugh out loud.

“You are too much” Ali shook her head and grinned as she kept up her work while the keeper continued literally kissing her ass.

“And I’m all yours baby...lucky, lucky you.”


	42. I Love Us Too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only three chapters left in this one....can't believe we're already at the end. It feels like I just started posting this a week ago. lol.

December was an odd mixture of fast and slow that year. Ashlyn moved slowly as she recovered from her knee surgery, and the kids seemed to move faster and faster every single day. They had holiday concert songs to learn, both Drew and Josie that year, and letters to write to Santa and decorations to draw and color and hang up all around the big old house. Tammye and Carol left after the first week of December, as scheduled, and Deb and Mike Christopher came back up for the week of Christmas, the fourth week of the month. Christmas was on Thursday that year and the young Krieger family was flying to Florida for 10 days starting on the 26th of December. In the meantime, for those two weeks in the middle of December, Ali did her best to take care of the kids, the dogs, the house and her wife. Ashlyn wasn’t completely useless, by any means. She was just really gimpy and she did everything much slower than usual.

Ali kept thinking back to the time she had taken care of her keeper after her shoulder surgery, before they were even a couple. If you asked either woman, they would both easily include those three weeks in January 2016 as one of the very best times of their lives. Hands down. They had basically played house together and discovered that they really did like being around each other 24/7. They learned that they both enjoyed having the other around all the time. Despite all the intense and excruciating pain that Ashlyn went through as she recovered from surgery and then rehabbed her shoulder, she would be the first to tell you that she had never been happier in her entire life than she was those three weeks with Ali. The brunette would agree. Her only regret was that she hadn’t been able to end her relationship with Sarah yet and had caused both women some pain during that time.

“Good job babe” Ali praised her wife as she helped her back into the recliner in the front living room.

“Yay Mama!” Drew chimed in as he moved his eyes from the tv to the blonde.

Josie lifted her head up from the coffee table where she was coloring another picture for Santa Claus and clapped for Ashlyn too. Ali was working from home that day and the twins were upstairs having their big, once a day, 3-hour afternoon naps.

“Ugh, thanks guys” the keeper smiled and then grimaced as she reclined the chair back and elevated her throbbing knee. “Best support team in the world right here” she gasped out, spent from the rehab exercises she had just completed. 

“Here we go” Ali slid the ice-wrap sleeve under Ashlyn’s right knee and then secured the velcro straps around it as she wrapped it all the way around her leg. 

Ashlyn reached out with her right hand and took the brunette’s hand when she was finished adjusting the sleeve. The keeper smiled appreciatively and squeezed her hand. Ali cocked her head and gave her wife a curious smile as they looked at each other for almost a full minute.

“You ok honey?” the brunette moved closer and mussed Ashlyn’s hair with her free hand, letting her fingers trail down the side of her face and cup her cheek.

“Yeah. I just...I don’t know” she shrugged and gave Ali a bashful smile. “I just always feel like you’re taking care of me. And here we are again and you’re still taking care of me” she nuzzled into the brunette’s palm.

“Well that’s what I’m here for” Ali smiled warmly and bent down for a soft kiss. “Besides, I’d rather be on this side of the equation every time” she laughed. “I do not like being the patient.”

“This is true” Ashlyn nodded and grinned, giving Ali’s hand one more squeeze before the brunette pulled away. “Thank you baby, for always taking such good care of me...of all of us.”

The Kriegers, over the past six years, had been a fairly typical house full of four little kids when it came to illness and sickness and injury. Ali continued to be just as hardy as she always had been. She got really sick once a year, still, and Ashlyn just prayed that it wasn’t during a time that she couldn’t be there to take care of her and the kids. The brunette still responded the same way, horny as hell, and took all of the same remedies as she had back when Sydney first taught Ashlyn how to take care of a sick Ali Krieger. As seemed to be the case with all mothers, the brunette’s sickness didn’t seem to last as long now as it did back then. Whether that was because of a strengthened immune system or simply because she didn’t have time to be sick was hard to say. But both Ali and Ashlyn had stronger immune systems now after living with four little bags of germs with cute faces and runny noses. It was nothing new, but it was real and no laughing matter. If one of the kids got sick then they all got sick, one at a time like a cruel, slow-moving joke. Ashlyn got sick about every third time the house became infected, and Ali only once a year. But Ashlyn’s bouts weren’t as severe as her wife’s one big sickness was and they didn’t last as long either. Drew was their most bulletproof, which was ironic because he was around more kids than his siblings were on a daily basis. He had school and then whatever sport or activity practice or game and then came home. You would think he was the most susceptible just because he was in contact with more potential germs every day. 

“I think he’s just tough as nails” Ashlyn suggested one night earlier that year while they were updating Drew’s medical folder in the desk drawer. 

He had just had his final immunization shot for the foreseeable future and both moms were relieved that at least one of their kids was done with his shots. Ali and Ashlyn both trusted Dr. Comello and her office with all of their family’s records, but Julie Donaldson had recommended that they keep just a simple folder for each kid with some dates in it of when major things happened. The nurse claimed that it was a lot easier and more efficient if you needed quick information for filling out permission slips or other things like that. The Kriegers had passed the helpful tip on to their other friends and it had definitely come in handy over the years for all three of the four families with kids.

“Ha!” Ali laughed her short, loud, shout of a laugh as she leaned her butt against the desk, watching her wife neatly write down the latest immunization and date in Drew’s folder right next to her. 

“What’s so funny?”

“You are” the brunette laughed again and shook her head. “Our son is a lot of things, but tough isn’t one of them.”

“What do you mean?” Ashlyn looked legitimately offended. “He’s tough. You’ve seen him playing soccer and basketball, he’s scrappy.”

“Yes, I’ll give you that for sure. He hustles and goes after every loose ball. I love that about him” Ali nodded thoughtfully and put her hand on Ashlyn’s arm and gave it a squeeze. “But Ash, he doesn’t like to get his hands dirty, or wet” she quirked her eyebrow. “He won’t even throw the ball for the dogs more than twice before he has to wash his hands.”

“So he likes to be clean. There’s nothing wrong with that” the keeper finished with the folder and closed it. She patted Ali’s hip to get her to move away from the pull-out drawers of the desk so she could put the folder away. “He’s still tough.”

“All three of the other kids, including Lily,” Ali raised both eyebrows up for emphasis, “are tougher than he is. Come on babe, you have to know that.”

“I think your definition of tough is too...tough” Ashlyn challenged with a playful, fake-offended, pout on her face.

“Honey, I love him to death and I think he’s perfect, but he screams like a girl, no actually – louder and higher pitched than even our girls, whenever he gets startled” Ali chuckled as she moved to the other side of the room and started straightening the tiny little coats and sweatshirts hanging on the hooks above the mudroom bench.

“Ooooh, yeah” Ashlyn winced and rolled her eyes as she stood up from the desk chair. “Ok, you got me there. Definitely not tough. But he’s only 6. He’ll grow out of that screaming, right?”

“Let’s hope so” Ali giggled. “Although Kyle used to do the same thing and I wouldn’t change him for the world.”

“Good point” the keeper turned off the desk lamp and pushed the chair in, only because her wife was standing there watching her. “I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.” She smiled at Ali as they met in a hug. “Maybe he’ll be mentally tough. That’s cool too.”

Josie was, by far, the kid who was the most sick. Both moms knew that was probably going to be a life-long thing, but kept hoping for the best. Their little redhead had had such a rough beginning to her life that her body was still, even at the age of 4-1/2, playing catch up. Not only was she smaller than other kids her age, but she was always a little sicklier. If there was a flu bug making the rounds at school she always got it, without fail. If all of the kids had been at a party and they found out a few days later that somebody else at the party had been sick, Josie would always be the one who got sick too. As feisty as her spirit and personality were, her body just wasn’t there yet. This, they knew from talking to Dr. Comello, would improve with age but might not never go away altogether. She didn’t have any official diseases or illnesses. She didn’t have allergies or anything like that. She just had a weaker immune system than everybody else. It got to the point sometimes where they would try to keep Josie away from her siblings if she was really sick so she wouldn’t pass it along to them. During those couple of times a year, she and Ali would spend a lot of time together so Ashlyn could try and keep the other kids, and herself, healthy. It seemed a little extreme, but what was really extreme was when the same flu bug made the rounds through all four kids and Ashlyn and then, made a second round just for good measure. Those were the times when both moms really felt tested and stretched to the max.

Dodge and Lily were both completely average in terms of sickness and illness. Dodge actually had some alopecia in a few spots on his scalp, but they weren’t very noticeable. That disease, where a couple of small bald spots appeared on his scalp, wasn’t uncommon. There were a few different kinds of alopecia and Dodge had the kind where the hair grew back and then fell out again over the course of several months. Dr. Comello said it was nothing to worry about so they didn’t. He also got more than his fair share of bumps, bruises and scrapes but that was just because he was that kid who was always trying to climb something or jump over something or carry something or push over something. He was called Destructoboy for a very good reason. He didn’t do it to be a jerk. He did it, his moms reasoned, to see if he could do it. It was just that simple. They were sure their youngest boy was going to grow up to be a mountain climber or a stunt pilot or something terrifying like that. It was just the way his personality was. Lily, for all her tears and fits, was pretty tough too. She had to be to withstand everything her twin brother dished out. Ashlyn was convinced little Lily was almost just as tough as Josie because she had to survive almost 9 months sharing her womb with Dodge. If she could survive that, then she could conquer the world.

In general the kids had been pretty lucky so far in terms of broken bones and serious injuries. Drew’s broken arm from the car accident was still the most serious thing to befall the littlest Kriegers. Lily had the scary bloody lip injury, courtesy of Josie’s sippy cup. And all four of them had little scars on their knees or elbows and even a tiny one on a chin or forehead that they knew would fade away to practically nothing before they were old enough to care about how it looked. But Ashlyn and Ali knew they had a long road ahead of them and that all four kids were probably going to break some part of their bodies at some point. Especially if they were going to participate in sports as it seemed they all wanted to do.

As for the moms themselves, their health had been pretty good too. Ashlyn’s many aches and pains were good some days and really bad other days, but nothing some advil or a soak in the tub couldn’t help. Her right leg definitely caused her the most discomfort, but, hopefully, the knee scope would help a lot with that. Thankfully, her hips were ok and her shoulders only bothered her when it rained. She liked to joke that she had the old lady body thing going for her and hoped to parlay that into a future in weathercasting on the local tv station. Ashlyn’s back acted up every once in a while but a good massage from her talented wife and some stretching and yoga could take care of that too. She didn’t have any lingering symptoms from her concussions, which was the soccer career injury Ashlyn secretly worried about the most. Well, maybe the second most. The keeper worried most about the osteoarthritis that she knew was coming her way at some point in her future. Ali knew the idea bothered her wife a lot because Ashlyn wouldn’t talk to her much about it. But, aside from getting a stronger prescription in her glasses and contacts, Ashlyn was in very good health. However, she wasn’t able to work out nearly as much as she used to or even half as much as she still wanted to. 

“Honey, I’m just saying that if it’s important to you, you need to make time to do it. Make it a priority. Schedule it in. Why don’t you go down to the gym a couple of mornings a week after we all leave and get a good workout in then?” Ali had asked that Fall while they were getting ready to go out for a dinner date. Ashlyn hadn’t liked the way a couple of pairs of pants fit her and kept grumbling about it as Ali put on her make-up at the dressing table. “That seems like a perfect time, right?” 

“Well I’m supposed to be working from home then Al” the keeper replied with a little bit of bite as she threw another pair of dress slacks on the bed in a bunch. “I already stop working from home early so I can pick up Josie and Drew...”

“Ashlyn” the brunette got up and crossed to her wife, putting both hands on her shoulders and looking her right in the eye with a heartfelt smile. “You’re not punching a timeclock. I know you. You get your work done. Everybody knows they can count on you at the office and at MHI and the Academy. But you’ve gotta make sure you feel good about you or the rest will start to fall apart. I know you don’t have a selfish bone in your body babe, but it’s time you started putting yourself first sometimes.”

“I’m always so afraid people think I’m just sitting here with my feet up...”

“I know” Ali agreed, moved to her wife’s closet and started looking at the other pants there. “It can be a real mindfuck if you let it. So don’t let it” she shrugged and pulled out a pair of jeans that she knew fit well and looked great on her keeper. “I know you wanted to get dressier tonight but I’d love it if you wore these” she handed them to the blonde with a wink. “Your ass looks amazing in these.”

Ashlyn blushed a little and started to put the jeans on.

“Well, in that case...problem solved” she smirked. “But I was thinking about something else, about the working out thing.”

“No, I won’t work out naked with you Ashlyn. It never works and you know it...”

Ashlyn giggled as she buttoned up her jeans and changed to a dressier shirt.

“That’s not what I meant but damn, now I really want to do that again” she grinned as she moved behind her wife and looked at her reflection in the dressing table mirror while buttoning up her mostly blue, muted wide plaid shirt.

“Oooh, are you going to wear your grey blazer with that again?” Ali asked, her face lighting up at the idea of Ashlyn wearing one of her favorite combinations.

“That depends” the keeper replied coyly as she finished buttoning her shirt and arched her back to accentuate her breasts in the nicely fitted shirt, teasing her wife. “Are you gonna work out naked with me again?” she quirked her eyebrow and smirked at the same time, barely able to contain the grin on her lips.

“Ha! Not unless you mean the kind of naked work out we do here with the doors locked” the brunette replied with her own challenging smirk.

“I can live with that compromise...for now” Ashlyn let her grin go and leaned down to kiss the back of her wife’s neck. “It’s a date. And yes, grey blazer for you my love.”

“Yes!” Ali’s eyes sparkled back at her wife in the mirror. “Alright, so what was your idea? And get your lips away from me” Ali giggled and leaned forward to finish her make-up. “We’re going to dinner.”

The keeper straightened up with a playful frown and whined a little bit.

“I could work out down in the gym if I wasn’t worried about not being able to see what the kids were up to, right?”

“Right.”

“So why don’t we turn half of the gym space into a playroom space for the kids? We could put a couch down there and a tv and how great would it be to move some of their toys down there?”

“Oh my God, don’t tease me” Ali chuckled and met her wife’s eyes in the mirror. “Really?”

“Yeah, I mean, why not?” the keeper shrugged. “We don’t need all that space down there for the three machines we have, and the lifting bench. It’s not like we have Whit here with us using them too. There’s never going to be more than the two of us using them at the same time. We have lots of room.” Ashlyn walked to her dresser to put on her watch and jewelry as she continued to explain her idea. “We’d keep the gym down at the far end of the basement, under the kitchen. That way the playroom will be the first thing you get to at the bottom of the basement stairs. The kids won’t have to walk through the equipment and stuff to get to their toys.”

“You’ve thought a lot about this, haven’t you?”

“Yeah, I’ve just gotta start doing some more work” the blonde looked down at her stomach. “Things don’t stay where they used to anymore and I hate that.”

Ali put her make-up away and moved to stand in front of her beautiful keeper, wrapping her arms around her waist.

“You look gorgeous honey” she leaned in and kissed Ashlyn’s lips sweetly. “But I know what you mean. I’m right there with you. This ass isn’t gonna stay the way we both like it if I don’t get working on it more” she looked over her own shoulder and shifted her hips inside the pretty, flower patterned skirt she was wearing. “I’m in. Let’s do it.”

Ali’s health had been good as well, aside from the ovarian cancer testing and the annual flu that knocked her off her feet for a few days. Her intensely painful menstrual cramps had fluctuated since giving birth to Josie and having her uterus surgically repaired. They had occurred roughly once a year for most of her adult life. Then, after Josie was born, they happened more frequently – almost every third month. Thankfully that only lasted for about a year and then they spread out again to where they currently were – back to about once a year. There was never a good time to have one of those cramp attacks but Ali had to be extra careful now that there were four kids relying on her for anything and everything. Deb and Sydney were the only two people who really knew a lot about the brunette’s struggles. Whitney, and Ali’s close friends, knew she would occasionally have really bad cramps but they had no idea just how bad they could be. As usual, Ali preferred to keep some things private and didn’t tell people about her killer cramps unless she had to. She relied on Sydney and Deb to help her if necessary or if Ashlyn was out of town. 

That was until Ashlyn was down in NC last October for the NWSL playoff game. Deb was in Miami, knowing that she would go see her daughter’s family the following week when the NWSL Championship week was held in Orlando. Sydney was travelling with her girls high school soccer team for a game and her mom was watching the Dwyer kids while Dom worked. It was Columbus Day weekend and Ryan and Whitney, four months pregnant, had driven North for a romantic weekend getaway. The good news was that there was no little league soccer that Saturday because of the holiday weekend. The bad news was that, because of the holiday weekend, there was nobody around except for Vicki and Ken. Ali got the kids up and they started their day as usual. They did the breakfast thing, got dressed, went outside and ran around in the yard for a while and then came back into the big old house for a snack and some advil for mommy. Her cramps were bad and had been bad all day but she felt like she had a handle on them. If she could only have laid still for thirty minutes or so she would have been ok. She would have been crampy and uncomfortable, but ok. Ali did her best to gut it out but by the time she had fed the kids lunch she was in trouble and she knew it. She had already started sweating and felt clammy and dizzy as the waves of pain radiated through her body. She honestly didn’t trust herself to climb the stairs with the 17-month old twins to put them down for their afternoon naps. Josie would need her shorter nap too. If she could just get them up and into bed she knew she could keep Drew quiet and still with a video game while she finally got the chance to curl up. She wished she could have called Julie Donaldson but their neighbors were away for the weekend too. Ali picked up her phone and pushed the button for her step-mother, breathing heavily and bending over in her seat at the nook table to try and alleviate some of the pain.

“Hey Ali, how’s it going?” Vicki’s cheerful voice answered the phone. 

“Ummmm good, but, listen, Vicki I need a favor...”

It took the brunette longer than it should have to ask Vicki to make the 25-minute drive to Gloucester. Ali just said she wasn’t feeling well and needed help getting the 3 youngest kids up and into their cribs for naps. The brunette loved Vicki and knew she could count on her, even though she’d rather not tell her what the real problem was if she didn’t have to. But, if she had to, then she would be ok with her step-mom knowing about her ailment. Something about telling another woman, someone who actually had a chance of understanding what she was experiencing, made it a little less uncomfortable to share the information. She ended the call and dragged herself into the front living room to see what trouble the kids were into. She sat on the bench seat in front of the bay window hoping that none of the kids would want to sit with her so they wouldn’t jostle her or get anywhere near her stomach. 

“No, guys, please...” she managed to say in a strangled voice that sounded foreign and a little scary to the kids. “Mommy doesn’t feel good right now so please, just play nicely. No Dodger, sweetheart, I’m sorry, but my stomach is ouchie right now, you can’t climb on me.”

Every word caused her pain but she managed a weak smile to try and reassure the kids that everything would be ok. It felt like the longest 30 minutes of her life and the twins were getting tired and cranky because they were late for their naps. 

“Helloo” the voice called from the mudroom door and both dogs and all four kids moved towards it. “Anybody home?”

Fuck. It wasn’t Vicki. Ali groaned out loud. It was her father.

“Princess?” Ken moved into the front living room, eyes searching for his daughter who he knew wasn’t feeling well.

Ali was doubled over on the window seat bench, her elbows on her knees and her head hung low. She was pale and clammy and drenched in sweat and Ken’s heart stopped when he saw her.

“Alex” he gasped out as he moved quickly towards her, kneeling down next to her and touching her back.

“Don’t” she flinched and leaned away until he removed his hand.

“Should I call an ambulance?” he asked anxiously, afraid to touch her again.

“No” she shook her head and winced. “Don’t scare the kids” she lowered her voice. “I just need to lie down for a while and I’ll be fine. I promise” she reached out and squeezed his hand that was right in front of her. “Really.”

Ken Krieger knew his daughter well. He knew she was tough and smart and if she said she would be ok if she could just lie down, then he believed her. But she looked like death warmed over and he was afraid she was just trying to be tough for the sake of the kids.

“Alright princess” he replied and tried to hide the fear in his voice. “Should I bring you up to bed first or...”

“No, naps, twins” were the only three words she could get out. 

Ideally, he would change their diapers and take off any uncomfortable clothing they were wearing, if any, before putting them down for their naps. But Ali couldn’t get those words out. And honestly, she didn’t care if the twins’ diapers leaked all over their cribs, as long as it didn’t wake them up during their naps. She would deal with that later. Ali slowly lay down on the bench seat and curled up into the fetal position. She wouldn’t get any true relief until she got her tampon out and put a pad on instead, but that would have to wait until she could get upstairs. Drew watched her carefully from his spot on the couch with Fred while Persey lay down right in front of the bench seat, a worried look on her sweet face.

“Mommy?” Josie asked as she stood in front of Ali’s face.

“MmHmm?” Ali hummed and tried to smile.

“Is Grandpa gonna take me for naps?”

“Yes, love” she replied softly through gritted teeth.

“When?”

“Soon.”

“How soon?”

“Very soon” Ali winced and then swallowed hard.

“Mommy, how come you’re all sweaty?”

As Ali tried to muster the strength to answer her daughter, Ken came back into the room from the front stairs.

“Ok rosy Josie, are you ready for your nap?” he asked with a big grin on his face.

He scooped her up as he looked anxiously at his own daughter curled up and in obvious misery.

“Be right back Drew” he said as he moved towards the front stairs again. “You just sit tight and let mommy rest ok?”

“Ok Grandpa.”

“Good boy.”

Three hours later Ken climbed the backstairs and quietly stepped into his daughter’s bedroom. He was relieved to see a bit more color in her face as she lay curled up on Ashlyn’s side of the bed, blanket pulled up to her shoulders. As soon as he had tucked Josie in for her nap Ken had called Deb to find out what the hell was going on with their daughter. She explained what was happening and told him what to do, and what not to do.

“Don’t touch her, don’t sit on the bed, any movement causes her a great deal of pain. Just bring her some water and some advil and she’ll be ok. You take care of the kids so she can lie down for an hour or so and she should be just fine” Deb spoke quickly, knowing Ali was still downstairs and not very comfortable.

“Jesus Deb. Are you sure I don’t need to call an ambulance?” he didn’t even try to hide his worry from his ex-wife. “She looks like she’s dying.”

“Ken, I promise you. She feels like she’s dying right now, but she’s not. Go get her and help her upstairs. It hurts for her to even talk so don’t take it personally if she doesn’t say anything” she paused. “Better yet, tell her you talked to me and you know what’s happening and then tell her not to say anything. She’ll just try to make you feel better...”

“I know, I know” he sighed. “She’s dying and she’ll try to make me more comfortable about her...illness.”

“That’s our Alex” Deb smiled into the phone. “Now go on and help her upstairs. Call me if you have any questions about the kids and we’ll figure it out.”

And that’s what Ken had done. He had checked on her after an hour, then two hours and now three hours. He set the new bottle of water and the banana on the nightstand as quietly as he could and fought the urge to kiss her forehead. For a moment it was like she was ten-years old again instead of a 41-year old mother of four little kids. His heart swelled as he looked at her for a moment. Ken heard her frail voice just as he turned to leave the room.

“Thanks dad.”

“Hey, hi baby girl” he turned and grinned as he came back to the bedside. “Are you feeling any better? You look a little bit better.”

“Yeah, I am. I’m so sorry...”

“Just hush now. I’m glad you called honey. And I’m sorry you got stuck with me instead of Vicki” he looked down and Ali couldn’t tell if he was embarrassed or if she had hurt his feelings by asking for Vicki’s help instead of his. “She had plans she couldn’t change without causing a huge...”

“It’s ok dad. I’m glad you’re here. Thank you.”

“Can I get you anything else? Do you need help to get to the bathroom or anything?” 

“No, I think I’m almost ready to get up” she rolled her head and shoulders over and blinked several times to loosen her contacts up. She wore the kind you could sleep in if you wanted to, but she took them out every night anyway. Just as she believed it was best to not wear underwear to bed so your body had a chance to breathe and relax, she felt that your eyes needed the same opportunity. “What time is it?”

“It’s almost 4pm. I’m just about to get the twins up” he replied. “They didn’t go down until 1pm so your mother said to let them sleep until 4pm. Josie’s been up for about an hour and a half and she’s coloring again” he chuckled. “That really is her favorite thing to do isn’t it?”

“It is” Ali smiled back. “I’m glad you called mom” she reached out for her father’s hand and scooched back so there was room for him to sit on the edge of the bed. “You must have been pretty freaked out.”

“Is it ok if I sit for a minute?” he asked and then gently sat on the bed when she nodded. “Alex, I had no idea what you went through. I’m so sorry honey. Your mom tried to explain it to me when you were much younger but none of the doctors seemed to know what to do and she told me not to worry about it...so I didn’t.” He paused and swallowed nervously. “Things were so different back then...”

“It’s ok dad” Ali squeezed his hand. “Really. Don’t worry about it.”

“We don’t have to talk about it princess” he smiled warmly at her as he spoke. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I just want you to know...” he paused again, his emotions choking off the words in his throat. “I would do anything for you, and the kids, anytime.”

“I know you would. I never doubted that for a minute. I just, it’s not something I tell a lot of people about” she shrugged. “The only way people find out is like this. They were lucky enough to be here when it happened” she chuckled and then winced.

“Just take it easy there chuckles” Ken teased softly. “We don’t want any relapses now.”

“No, we definitely do not” she agreed. “And, just so you know, they’re usually not this bad” she looked down uncomfortably. “Even the really bad ones aren’t this bad if I can lie down fast enough. But the longer I fight it the worse they get.”

“The cavalry was slow today” he frowned.

“It’s impossible to plan for dad. If I knew when it was going to happen I’d make arrangements. Please don’t feel bad. You’re my hero. I can’t even think about what I would’ve done without you this afternoon.”

“You would have passed out pretty soon I think” his eyes went wide at the thought.

“Seriously dad, don’t freak out. It only happens, like, once a year and Ashlyn’s usually around or Syd. It’s ok, I promise.”

“I trust you Alex. I know you’d never put your kids or yourself at risk” he smiled again, happy he could say those things and mean them. “It’s just sort of a shock to the system to find out you go through this...routinely. I had no idea.”

“Well, welcome to the inner circle” she grinned and then moved to sit up against the headboard with a grimace. She reached for the banana and started to eat it so she could take some more advil. Only then would she even attempt to get out of bed. “This is perfect” she said, mouth full and gesturing with the banana. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome princess. I’m going to get the twins up now. You just take your time” he reached out to pat her leg but stopped in mid-air and pulled his hand back. “Vicki’s coming over in about an hour so she can help with dinner too” he added as he carefully stood up. “So you just relax and call me if you need anything ok?”

“Ok. Thanks again dad.”

Both Ashlyn and Ali knew they were going to experience new ailments as they got older and their bodies started to age. They were only 40 and 41, respectively, and still in great shape and good health and had nothing to worry about. Except the stupid cancer. But that was becoming part of their new normal and they had decided to try not to get upset about something they had no control over. Ali would keep getting her ultrasounds and bloodwork done and they would keep moving along with their big, beautiful life together. Ashlyn would keep getting the leftover aches and pains from her professional soccer career tended to so she didn’t turn into a frail old woman who couldn’t move anymore. That December she hobbled around with a cane for a couple of weeks and then started her rehab exercises to get her knee feeling, hopefully, better than it had in years. 

It wasn’t ideal timing for the knee scope, but they made it work. Ashlyn limped her way through the Knight-Harris Company’s annual holiday party the second Friday of the month as well as Noah Cross’ 10th birthday party the next day. She went and volunteered to help with Drew’s class holiday concert while Ali volunteered for Josie’s class. The keeper was a natural when it came to the 1st graders’ art work. It was going to be displayed in the entry hallway of the school as an art gallery all the parents and families could enjoy on their way into the concert. Ali did all of the shopping so Ashlyn didn’t have to be on her knee in all the crowds, standing in all the lines. Once she was cleared to drive, and off of the heavy-duty pain pills, in the third week of December, Ashlyn was able to do more things and be more helpful to the whole family. 

Towards the end of that third week, the blonde was upstairs reading to the kids for storytime and then she and Ali tucked everybody in. Ali had been downstairs, Ashlyn assumed cleaning up after dinner, while she read to the kids. But when the keeper made her way back downstairs she was surprised to find the whole first floor in darkness, except for the candles in the windows and the Christmas tree with its multi-colored lights all aglow in the family room. The brunette took her hand at the bottom of the backstairs and tugged carefully on it to lead her through the completely decked out and decorated family room, the more sedately decorated dining room, and into the front parlor. The old camping mattress that they had used on almost every floor in the house by that point was in the middle of the floor, made up with a sheet, blanket and several bed pillows. Ali had moved the two wingback chairs and table out of the way so there was room for the mattress right in the middle of the room. The windows all had a candle lit in them and the brunette had used some temporary sticky hooks on the ceiling and hung five strings of lights all across the area above the mattress. Surprisingly, they weren’t in neat rows or orderly patterns. Ali had gone abstract and just let them randomly hang from the hooks, creating a very pleasing and softly lit chaos of white lights as well as colored lights across the ceiling.

“Wow, look at what you did” Ashlyn marveled as she took in the room with wide eyes and open mouth. 

Ali grinned as she watched her wife’s reaction, leaning up to kiss her cheek as the blonde looked up at the lights decorating the ceiling. She gently pulled Ashlyn’s arm towards the mattress, guiding her down and helping her get situated so she was laying on her back and looking up at their own version of a starry night.

“Lift up your knee” the brunette instructed softly as she pushed a throw pillow from the love seat underneath it for support. She bent over and kissed Ashlyn’s knee, through her joggers, before moving to lie next to her wife on the mattress. “You comfy?”

“Yeah, honey...” the keeper finally pulled her eyes away from the beautiful room and met her wife’s loving gaze. “What is all this? I love it, I just don’t get it yet.”

“Since we can’t get to ‘The Nutcracker’ this year I thought I’d try and bring it to us, sort of” she ended her answer with a bashful smile as Ashlyn’s face lit up and her dimpled grin got even bigger.

“I’m so sorry baby...”

“Shhhhhh...” Ali leaned over to her right and pressed a soft, sweet kiss to her wife’s lips to interrupt her. “I wish we could have gone too, just like you do” she pulled back and smiled adoringly at the blonde. “But we’ll live. And for now, we’ll pretend we’re there and see how far we can get before one of the kids needs something” she winked as she reached for the remote that operated the Bose speakers where her iPhone was docked and pressed play. “And if Santa wants to be good to us this year he’ll let us get all the way through the hour and fifteen minutes in peace” she sighed happily as she settled next to the love of her life.

As the beautiful sounds of Tchaikovsky’s score filled the front parlor, the two women lay side by side, shoulder to shoulder, elbow to elbow, and hip to hip. They held hands and enjoyed the warm, inviting atmosphere Ali had created in the room while the ‘Miniature Overture’ played to begin the ballet they would only see in their minds’ eyes that night. It was incredible how quickly and easily they fell under the calm, quiet spell of the music. Ashlyn felt her entire body relax, her heartrate slow, and her worries disappear as she let Tchaikovsky take over. All she felt was her wife’s soft hand in hers and the pleasant ache of her heart bursting at the seams with love and gratitude. How had Ali found the strength and energy to even do this for them tonight? It was the week before Christmas and their family had been as busy as always during the holiday season. And Ali had been doing more than her fair share, picking up the slack from Ashlyn and her knee. Somehow she had made the time to buy the extra lights and decorations for their own private Nutcracker suite. She had raced around getting everything set up while Ashlyn read to the kids and now here they were. Enjoying a wonderfully romantic and relaxing and perfect, hopefully, hour and 15 minutes of togetherness. The keeper wanted to tell Ali how much she loved their night and her efforts to bring one of their favorite traditions home to her that night. She wanted to tell her how much she appreciated the care and concern and consideration the brunette always showed her, regardless of whether the ride life was giving them happened to be bumpy or smooth. Ashlyn wanted to tell her wife how thankful she was for her partnership, her friendship, her camaraderie, her companionship, her sisterhood, her fellowship as they moved through their life together. She wanted to tell the brunette how honored she was to be the one who got to know her so intimately and love her so privately and profoundly. She wanted Ali to know just how very much she meant to her every single minute of each and every day. But there weren’t words. The keeper didn’t know how to begin to try and explain all of it. 

“Hey Al?” she finally spoke, about 45 minutes later, her voice soft and full of emotion.

Ali could hear the quiver in her wife’s voice and brought her hand up to her mouth and held it to her lips before answering her.

“Yes, love?”

Ashlyn turned her head to the side and gave her a watery smile as she fought back the tears threatening to spill down her cheeks.

“Thank you” she squeaked out, blinking at her beautiful brunette. “Thank you for giving me my life, this life, our life...” she couldn’t continue, her throat choking her words off before she could finish.

Ali felt her own eyes start to tear up as her wife’s heartfelt words filled her ears and her heart and her soul. She rolled onto her right side and cupped Ashlyn’s face with her left hand, gently stroking her cheekbone with her thumb and gazing into her favorite, tawny hazel eyes. She spoke, her voice strong but soft and loving, and then kissed her keeper’s trembling lips.

“I love us too, babe.”


	43. Christmas & Gram's Garden

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay fam, only one chapter left after this one, but both of the last two chapters are a little longer than usual. 
> 
> Oh and a little Smut warning in the middle of this chapter...

Christmas Eve was at the big old house that year and Deb and Ali managed a wonderful evening full of good food, loving family and friends, and lots of Christmas magic. Ali felt especially blessed to have all of her family there, in her own home, celebrating together. She never took for granted the fact that her mother and father had found a way to stay more than civil over the years so they could share these family holidays together. Ali knew it was a rarity and she would forever be grateful to them both. Deb and Vicki weren’t exactly friends, nor were Mike and Ken, but they were able to co-exist and enjoy their time together, putting family first above all else. The brunette thought it had been very helpful that neither of them had gotten remarried right away, allowing time to soften the hard edges of the divorce and broken marriage.

Koty and Brianna, Kyle and Nathan, the Kimballs, Jared and his boyfriend, the Dwyers and Sandi Leroux, and even Tanner, grateful that the Revs didn’t fly out for their away game until Friday the 26th that week, were all there. The Scott Krieger clan stayed up in New Hampshire, but would be going to Ken’s house for Christmas Day the next afternoon. As both branches of the family started having more little kids and babies, it got harder and harder to do a lot of travelling on Christmas Eve, so they just decided to focus on Christmas Day instead. Nobody’s feelings were hurt and everybody understood. Not even Aunt Becky could find fault with the compromise. The Flanagans and Whitney’s parents made the drive to Gloucester too. Kim and Chris Engen were visiting for three weeks to celebrate the holiday with their new granddaughter and were very happy and excited to be included in the big, boisterous Krieger family gathering.

Ashlyn was so happy to have Whitney and her family there with them that nothing could dampen her spirits that afternoon and evening, not even her still sore knee or an ill-behaved Drew Krieger. They Facetimed with the Harris clan down at Chris and Beth’s house and that made the keeper both happy and sad, as it always did. Her spirits were lifted right back up when her best friend gave her a side hug and reminded her that she would be seeing them all in just two days. Kyle and Nathan stayed at the big old house while Jared and his boyfriend stayed at the Kimball’s house in Ipswich that night. It was a first for Jared, and Ali and Nathan shared a meaningful look when the plans were brought up in conversation that evening. Josie was in her glory with so many of her favorite men in the house, she just kept moving from one to the next, even giving Whitney’s dad a try for a while. Finally, she settled into Koty’s lap and stayed there for the duration. The only exception was when Nathan played the piano and everybody went to sing Christmas carols in the front parlor. Then she tugged Koty’s arm and led him towards the piano while Brianna took pictures and chuckled.

“I don’t even want to think what she’ll do when Koty and Bri have a baby” Ashlyn rolled her eyes and sighed.

“Oh wow” Kyle chuckled. “That’s gonna get ugly.”

“Yeah, better hope that doesn’t happen anytime soon” Whitney agreed with a laugh. “Although I’m not sure she’ll ever grow out of that crush.”

“The first is always the worst, right?” the keeper laughed with them.

Ali and Ashlyn waited and waited for the Facetime call from Meg down in DC but it never came. Ali kept asking her wife if she had missed the call and Ashlyn kept looking at her phone and telling her no. For the first time ever, 13-year old Meg had made a real stink about not being able to spend Christmas with the Kriegers. She had never spent the holiday anywhere but with her mother and nobody had ever expected that to change. Except for Meg. Ashlyn and Hannah talked about Meg as they often did, during their weekly phone calls. The keeper knew from her own conversations with the teenager that tensions were rising between mother and daughter. It was a natural progression of the disagreement that had occurred that summer about Meg spending so much of the summer away from Hannah and DC. Ashlyn had been able to talk her step-daughter into choosing the kinder, gentler route when it came to her mother’s feelings back in August. But there had been no negotiating Christmas and Meg was pissed off about it. She was so upset that Ashlyn had just shut down her pleas to intercede with Hannah on her behalf, that she called Ali directly and asked her to jump into the fray. The brunette had diplomatically stayed out of it, reminding Meg of what she already knew – that Hannah and Ashlyn made those decisions together.

“I hope she’s not punishing Ash for not getting her here for Christmas” Ali chewed her lip anxiously as she stood next to Sydney in the kitchen later in the evening. “She’ll be just heartbroken if Meg doesn’t call her tonight.”

“Those redheads” Sydney quirked a playful eyebrow at her bestie and took another sip of wine. “You gotta watch out for their crazy tempers” she winked. 

“You don’t have to tell me” Ali rolled her eyes. “Your goddaughter reminds me way too often” she chuckled, thinking of how angry Josie got once she was finally pushed too far. “Should I call Hannah and find out what’s going on?”

“No, stay out of it” Sydney replied definitively. “It’ll only make it worse. I know you’re worried about your boo getting her heart stomped on tonight...but I don’t think calling Hannah will help anyway. If she tells Meg to call Ash it’s just gonna piss her off even more.”

“You’re right, you’re right” Ali exhaled. “I’m going to wait another hour and then I’m Facetiming Meg myself.”

But Ali didn’t have to wait another hour because Ashlyn had the same idea and called Meg thirty minutes later from the privacy of the master bedroom. The keeper was afraid of what kind of mood the teenager would be in and didn’t want to Facetime in front of everybody else until she could gauge it. The call didn’t go that well at first. After ten long, painful minutes of Ashlyn asking open-ended questions to try and get the girl talking had failed miserably, she was at the end of her rope.

“Well, I don’t know what else to do Meggie” she sighed in frustration over the phone. “It’s obvious you don’t want to talk to me so I’ll let you go. I’m assuming you don’t want to Facetime and say hi to everybody else?”

“No...”

“Yeah, I didn’t think so” Ashlyn cut her off, her frustration mounting.

“No, I mean no I don’t not want to talk to you” the redhead offered weakly.

“Oh, ok” the keeper paused, not sure what to say after spending so long already trying to get her to talk. “So why don’t you tell me what’s on your mind kiddo” her voice softened a bit and Meg noticed.

There was a quiet moment where nothing could be heard but breathing on both ends of the call. Then, finally, Meg spoke, her voice small and wounded and broken.

“Why don’t you want me to spend Christmas with you?”

“What? Meggie, that’s not it at all sweetheart. You know that. You know that’s not what’s going on, right?”

The silence she got in reply made her heart break.

“Meg, honey, I always want you here with us. I’ve told you that before, a hundred times and it’s the truth” the keeper tried to keep her voice steady and even so the teenager could focus on the words. “But your mom wants you there with she and Dev just as much. It’s not about not wanting to spend Christmas with you at all. It’s the opposite – we both want to spend it with you Meggie.”

“Then why can’t we all spend it together?”

The simplicity of the solution was dazzling and Ashlyn felt sick to her stomach that a 13-year old had to be the one to come up with it.

“I honestly don’t know. But I’ll talk to your mom about it, I promise. And next year maybe we can make that happen. Is that what you’d like? All of us to be together on Christmas? Ali and the kids and your mom and Dev?”

“And me and you too” Meg added quickly.

“Well, of course. Duh. Can you imagine all these lame-os trying to have a fun Christmas without you or me?” she laughed out loud and was thrilled to hear the redhead join her, finally.

They talked for a few more minutes about their days and Christmas Eve and plans for Christmas Day.

“So are you sure you don’t want to say hi to everybody?” she tried again. “Whit and Ryan brought Becca and you won’t believe how big she is already. And you have to see Deb’s new haircut, she got it all cut off and it looks great, almost as good as mine...”

Meg agreed to the Facetime call with a giggle and Ashlyn went back downstairs and called everybody together so they could all say hello. It wasn’t until later that night that she told Ali about her conversation and what Meg wanted to happen next Christmas.

“Ugh” the brunette groaned as they placed the presents from Santa under the tree. “I don’t know what would be worse, bringing all four kids down to DC and trying not to destroy Dev’s house or having Hannah and Dev up here with us instead. Just...ugh.”

“Don’t hold back” Ashlyn giggled, “tell me how you really feel.”

“You know I love Meg and I’ll do anything for her, but Jesus that’s a tough one.”

“Well try not to worry about it yet.” The blonde patted her wife’s butt as they moved the next stack of presents towards the tree. “It’s a long way away and I haven’t even told Hannah about it yet. Besides, Meg’ll be 14 next year and maybe the last thing she’ll want is for all of us to be together at Christmas. You know how fickle teenage girls can be.” 

“Whatever happens, you guys have to figure it out early so we can all plan around it” Ali returned the butt pat with a little pinch too. “Don’t you dare wait until November to make these plans Ashlyn Michelle Krieger.”

“Ow!” she jumped at the pinch and then giggled as she turned and wrapped her wife in a hug. “I would never...” she teased and then brought their lips together in a slow kiss that Ali deepened, surprising the keeper.

“I love you babe, and I’m glad you called and spoke with Meg tonight. It was a pretty good night, right?” Ali asked as they held each other after the kiss.

“It was a pretty great night” Ashlyn pecked her lips and pulled back. “You were amazing, as usual, and everybody had a really good time.”

“And you didn’t kill Drew...” Ali teased and giggled.

“Man, I don’t know if he’s going through a growth spurt or just figuring out how to be a dick, but boy was he a brat tonight” Ashlyn shook her head as residual frustration started to invade their space.

They were both remembering their son’s foul mood that had started right after breakfast. The advent calendar that Ashlyn had asked Niki to build for Ali was one of the kids’ favorite things about Christmas. Starting on December 1st they went to the painted, wooden calendar and one child each day pulled out the tiny drawer for whatever day they were on, plucked the chocolate out of it and shoved it into their mouth with a grin. Then they turned the drawer around and pushed it back into place so it made up part of the snowy village scene that would be completed when all 24 drawers had finally been turned around on Christmas Eve morning. Luckily, the number of kids and the turns they would take had always worked out evenly. Drew and Josie had each had 12 turns when it was just the two of them. And once the twins had been born, all four of them had 6 turns each. They went by age so Drew turned around the drawer with the 1 on it, then Josie with the 2, Dodge with the 3 and Lily with the 4. That meant Lily got the final drawer on the 24th. But that morning, for some unknown reason, Drew had decided that he was going to open the 24 drawer himself. All hell had broken loose, complete with Lily’s shrill and, seemingly constant, tears. Ali had been forced to yell louder than usual, give Drew a time-out and then spend fifteen minutes calming Lily down. And Drew did three or four more jerky things throughout the day that one or the other of his moms caught him at. They calculated quickly and figured out that he had spent about an hour and a half, all totaled, sitting in the time-out chair that day before friends and family arrived.

“He was pretty bad. He didn’t sleep well last night so I’m going with overtired, overexcited and maybe a growth spurt too” the brunette replied with a warm smile. “Let’s hope we don’t want to kill him tomorrow too.”

“Yeah, murdering your eldest child definitely gets you on the naughty list, doesn’t it?” Ashlyn joked.

“Come on, let’s finish up so we can go to sleep” Ali yawned, kissed her keeper again and then got back to work.

Ashlyn smiled into the brief kiss and patted her wife’s butt again as she turned back towards the tree in front of her. 

“Merry Christmas Eve baby.”

//

Over the past 6-1/2 years Ashlyn and Ali had learned to be flexible about the timing of their special, private Christmas gifts for each other. Once they had kids there was just no way it was going to happen on Christmas Eve. That was one of the busiest, most frenzied nights of the entire year as they hustled around getting the house and gifts and stockings ready for the early morning wake-ups after Santa’s visit. If they could make it work, they usually finished their Nutcracker date night with some x-rated gifts and sex, especially if they had a babysitter for some or all of the kids. That year they hadn’t made it to the Nutcracker and Deb and Mike Christopher didn’t come up until the week of Christmas, giving them only three days before Christmas Eve so there hadn’t been a lot of opportunity for date nights. They had agreed to wait and exchange gifts when they got home from their trip to Florida right after Christmas. In the meantime, they did their best to connect in the busy holiday season. On Monday, December 22nd, Deb and Mike Christopher picked up Drew and Josie and took them to lunch and spent the afternoon at their condo in Manchester, MA making Deb’s Christmas cookies. As the kids started to get a little older, all of the grandparents liked to take them on little adventures. The kids had their last morning of school for the week that day and were excited to go with Grandma and Mike for an afternoon of even more fun. Ali was also working from home that week, but the holidays continued to be one of the quietest times all year for Knight-Harris so she didn’t have to worry about much unless Marcy Hopkins called her from the office. She and Ashlyn had made plans to go down to the basement and work out as soon as the twins went down for their naps. They were both making a bigger effort to get into their home gym together, getting an early jump on their New Year’s resolutions. 

After a solid hour of pushing each other in the basement gym, Ashlyn limped upstairs to take a shower while Ali checked her email and returned a couple of calls. The hot water burned the keeper’s aching muscles as she lowered her head and let it pound into her shoulders. She tried to relax her mind too but found it jumping back to the list of things she needed to do around the house before they hosted Christmas Eve in two days. Deb and Mike were taking the twins out tomorrow morning and that would be a good time to get some things done. Ashlyn felt the bathroom door open and close again as the air shifted above the square, glass shower directly across from it. Before she could turn to see what her wife needed, she felt Ali’s arms around her waist, her breasts against her back, her short, dark curls pressed against her ass and her warm lips working across her right shoulder blade.

“Thought you could use some help in here” the brunette’s voice was low and filled with want as she mumbled against her wife’s skin.

“Mmmmmm, yes please” the keeper hummed and reached back to touch Ali’s body anyplace she could.

Ali had always loved showering with Ashlyn and the feeling certainly wasn’t changing the longer they were together. Her very first image of the blonde had been one of her half naked body before she even saw her face or knew her name. Sometimes the brunette felt shallow for coveting her keeper’s body the way that she always had, but deep down she knew it wasn’t just a cosmetic or aesthetic appreciation. It was much deeper than that. Right now, at that very moment standing behind her in the shower, Ali had never wanted Ashlyn’s body more. Well, maybe when she was pregnant but she was chalking up those insane levels of desire to the hormones. But aside from that, the brunette had never been more attracted to or in love with her wife’s body than she was right now in December of 2025. Ashlyn’s stomach wasn’t as tight as it once was and most of the rest of the muscles in her arms and legs had lost their definition over the past four years since she stopped playing professional soccer. Ali didn’t care. She loved how her keeper’s body was softer now and a touch less angular. Her cheekbones and jawline would always be plenty of gorgeous angles for the brunette, no matter what else happened with the rest of Ashlyn’s beautiful figure. Ali hoped that she always got this turned on while watching her keeper working out in the gym. Yes please.

She worked her hands across the blonde’s stomach and down her thighs and up her sides to her shoulders as she let the hot water stream between their bodies. Now that her own front was wet, she dragged her breasts down Ashlyn’s back and over her sexy ass, squatting down and sliding her hands down and around both of her long, strong legs. The keeper spread her legs out a bit wider to help keep her balance as she leaned forward with her head still down and her palms pressed against the tile wall of the shower in front of her. Ali brought her lips to the curve where her wife’s ass met her right thigh and gently kissed the soft, wet skin there. She gave two slow licks as she continued to stroke Ashlyn’s thighs, inside and out. The brunette moaned when she felt her wife shudder in response to gentle fingers grazing the short hairs at the bottom of her opening.

“Mmmmmm...so gorgeous...”

“Jesus Al” the keeper gasped out as she shuddered.

Ali nibbled and bit at her wife’s sexy ass as she started to move back up her body. She slid her right arm around to the front and cupped Ashlyn’s hot core as she stood straight up again. Her mouth was at the back of the keeper’s neck and their bodies were pressed tightly together again, Ali’s stiffening nipples poking the blonde in the back.

“I’ve been wanting to fuck you ever since we got down to the basement” Ali husked out. She flattened her right hand and pressed her palm and fingers up against Ashlyn’s pussy lips, the heel of her palm just touching her clit the slightest bit. “Your body is so fucking hot...I can’t keep my hands off of you.”

“Oh fuck...” Ashlyn gasped again and steadied herself. She lifted her head up and turned it to the right, speaking over her shoulder. “If you’d...let us work out...naked...” she continued to gasp every few words as Ali gently rubbed her clit, “we could have...been fucking...for over an hour...by now.”

The brunette couldn’t help but smirk and chuckle when she put her keeper’s words together. She smacked her wife’s ass hard with her left hand and bit down on her shoulder.

“Better late than never” she purred into Ashlyn’s skin with her lips still in a smirk.

“Ow! Mmmmmmmm...yes baby...yes...” she let out a low, throaty chuckle and stuck her ass back farther into Ali’s hips.

The brunette moved her left arm up and began to play with Ashlyn’s breasts, massaging them and squeezing them and then tugging and pinching at the pretty pink nipples as they hardened beneath her fingers. She had originally planned a long, drawn-out shower massage full of teasing and a lengthy stop with her mouth between her wife’s legs before finally giving her the orgasm she knew she would be more than ready for. But fuck if Ali could control herself now that the love of her life was in her arms. The brunette was torn about what to do, but when Ashlyn’s body shuddered again as it pressed back into her own...she lost all self-control.

“Fuck! I want you so bad right now...” she groaned as she pulled Ashlyn’s body back into her own, both hands still moving while her lips found her keeper’s neck.

“Shit baby...goddamn you feel so good...” the blonde moaned and let her head tilt back and to her left, giving Ali more room to work on her neck.

The brunette was conflicted again by just where she wanted her hands the most. She wished like hell she had the strap-on buried deep inside Ashlyn’s pussy right that minute. She loved having her wife’s body so close to hers and covering so much of her own skin. It felt incredible as they slid over each other’s slick bodies in the hot, sexy, steamed up glass shower. Ali turned their bodies so her back was against the tiled wall opposite the glass door. The shower head was on the tiled wall between the shower and the double vanity next to it. She pulled her wife with her and squeezed her tightly, sucking and biting at her neck with abandon. Ali had all of the keeper’s body weight leaning against her and pinning her to the tile wall behind them. She felt all the passion pooled between Ashlyn’s legs and she knew her girl was just as worked up as she was by now.

“So fucking wet babe...makes me so crazy...”

The keeper stretched her long arms down and grabbed whatever part of Ali’s thighs and ass she could as they rocked together, finding a rhythm as the brunette thrusted her hips into the blonde’s ass and started rubbing her clit in earnest. Ali kept her left hand moving from one breast to the other, loving the way her wife moaned and grunted in her arms. She could feel every muscle of Ashlyn’s body as it responded to her touches. It was a little hard to breathe with her wife pressing back into her chest like that, but Ali loved it and moved her right hand even faster as it worked up Ashlyn’s aching clit.

“Fuck Al... Jesus...unhhhhhh...” she let her head rest back against the tile, next to Ali’s, totally letting herself go and hoping her beautiful brunette would be there to catch her when she came.

But Ali was ready, she had spread her legs out for more support when they moved to the back wall, anticipating her wife’s eventual release. And as much as she wanted this moment of soft, wet skin against smooth, slick skin to last, the brunette couldn’t take it anymore. She knew Ashlyn was close by the way she was breathing and the way her legs had started to tremble. Ali was dying to get her wife off.

“I’ve got you” she mumbled against her keeper’s neck. “Come for me Ashlyn...”

She bit down hard on the blonde’s neck and pinched her nipple at the same time, keeping hard and fast pressure on her clit. 

“Oh God...fuck...yes baby...yessssssss!!!!” Ashlyn let out a strangled cry as her orgasm took her over and her body shook hard.

Ali slid her right hand lower and tried to keep the heel of her palm away from her wife’s sensitive clit as she rocked and jerked in her arms. She felt dizzy with her own want when her fingers found their way into all of Ashlyn’s juices. God it felt amazing to have her in her arms like that. Ali never wanted to let her go.

“Mmmmmm...so beautiful...so sexy...” she kissed each word into Ashlyn’s neck as she continued to hold her up, their bodies still tight together as the keeper rode out her orgasm.

It hadn’t been the biggest or the best, Ali had to make hard decisions about what parts of her gorgeous wife got touched and which didn’t. But that was ok. The brunette fully intended to enjoy that time between Ashlyn’s legs as soon as possible. She smirked into the top of her wife’s shoulder and Ashlyn could feel it.

“So good baby...” she panted out and moved her still tingling arms to cover Ali’s around her own waist. “Jesus you kill me” Ashlyn grinned as she tried to catch her breath. She turned her head all the way to the right and waited for Ali to meet her lips with a kiss. “Mmmmmm...” she moaned into it and tried to turn around to face her but the brunette’s hold was too tight.

“Just another minute” Ali breathed out after the kiss. “Ok babe?” she asked and moved her lips back to her wife’s neck and shoulder. “Are you alright? Is your knee ok?”

“Yeah, I’m soooooo good” the keeper smiled and closed her eyes again, resting her head back against the tile wall behind her. The water continued to spray down on them from their left, keeping them warm and wet the whole time. “Knee’s fine. Are you sure I’m not too heavy for you? Can you even breathe?” she chuckled as she tried to use her own legs to support herself again.

“I love holding you like this...we never do this...” Ali’s voice was full of love and desire, not a hint of complaint or whining. “Thank you honey.”

“You join me in the shower, make me come, holding my old decrepit body up, no less” she chuckled again as she lifted her head and opened her eyes to try and look at her beautiful brunette, “and you’re thanking me? If this isn’t heaven then I don’t wanna know what is.”

//

The holiday season seemed to have raced by the Kriegers. It had been fun but busy even though they didn’t do a lot of the things they normally did. There had been no ice skating on Boston Common, no Nutcracker, no sleepovers at Grandma’s condo in Manchester. Between Ashlyn hobbling around and Ali trying to pick up the slack and Deb and Mike Christopher staying in Miami until the week of Christmas, there just wasn’t time for everything that year. And that was ok. The kids were happy and had enjoyed the season anyway. Santa had been good to them and their relatives had been good to them and their moms had been good to them. There was nothing for anybody to complain about, it just was missing some of Ashlyn and Ali’s favorite things. But neither of them made a big deal out of it. They were grateful every day for all the love in their lives, but especially so at the holidays. Both women knew their happiness account was way in the black. The ledger was definitely balanced in their favor.

As they moved through the Melbourne airport on Friday December 26th Ashlyn finally understood why some parents used to put leashes on their children. She was carrying her own messenger bag, packed to the gills, as well as two other kid backpacks and the big, ever-present kid bag. It used to be the diaper bag, but since Dodge was the only one not completely potty trained it had morphed into the ‘crap needed to keep kids happy in any of 20 different scenarios’ bag. The keeper looked and felt like a pack mule and seriously wondered why those kid leashes fell out of popularity. She just managed to reach out and grab the hood of Dodge’s spiderman sweatshirt before he ran into oncoming foot traffic after the superball that Drew had just bounced and then missed.

“Dodge! Stay right here” she barked and lunged forward, trying to keep the two extra backpacks slung over her shoulder from flying forward and smacking into her youngest son. “And Drew I told you not to bounce that ball in the airport.” Her voice was angry and her face was one big scowl. “Now go get it, don’t walk in front of anybody, watch where you’re going, do NOT run, and do not bounce it again” she instructed through gritted teeth.

The 6-1/2 year old scampered off to collect the superball that he’d had his eyes on the whole time. Dodge pulled against her grasp on his hood and whined as he turned his face up to his Mama’s. She met his little face with a slightly less scowl-y look and he grinned up at her and then took two steps and hugged her leg.

“If I’d known he was going to get a superball out of the machine I never would have given him that quarter” Ali sighed as she caught up to the other half of her family. 

She had her huge travelling purse, Lily’s backpack as well as Lily herself on her hip. The 2-1/2 year old girl had thrown a hissy fit as they disembarked the plane because she didn’t want to carry her own backpack like all the other kids were doing. She was about to have a full-on temper tantrum right there in the gangway before Ali picked both her and her backpack up and marched forward with clenched jaw. As soon as Lily didn’t have to carry her backpack, both boys had dropped theirs too. Only little Josie was doing what she was supposed to be doing. She stood there quietly in front of Ali, with her own backpack on her back and a look of wonder on her face as she watched all the activity of the busy airport around her. They waited two minutes for Drew to retrieve the ball and return to them, only cutting off one busy traveler before he came to a jumping stop next to Ashlyn.

“I’m so sorry” the keeper apologized to the businesswoman who stopped short to avoid colliding with the boy. “Do you want one?” she asked the woman with a roll of her eyes, mostly as a joke. She immediately held her breath, realizing how her words might offend a number of people for a number of different reasons.

“No thanks, they’re cute though” the woman finally chuckled as she started walking again. 

“Alright guys, I know you’re tired but everybody needs to carry their own backpack, remember?” Ali sighed but tried to keep her voice level and calm as other travelers moved around them. The backpacks weren’t heavy. They held the super essentials that each child needed for travelling: their own blankie, one medium sized stuffed animal or two small ones, a couple of short books, a couple of random but irreplaceable small toys or knick knacks, an activity or coloring book, and a plastic case with crayons, pens, pencils or markers in it. “How is Josie the only one doing what she’s supposed to be doing?” she looked at both boys as Ashlyn handed them their backpacks. “Thank you for being such a good girl Jose” the brunette leaned down and caressed the top of the red head after putting Lily down on her own two feet.

“It looks like Josie might be the only one who gets dessert tonight” Ashlyn challenged with a cock of her head as she watched the boys slowly slip their arms into their backpacks. “I sure do love Caro’s desserts too” she smiled and licked her lips. 

She thought about how Carol always made some sort of sweet treat for the kids for after dinner. Sometimes it was as simple as fresh chocolate chip cookies right out of the oven. Other times it was a much more elaborate dessert she had perfected over the years. They were always insanely delicious and she had a real knack for making things that kids always liked too. 

“Come on Lily, you too” the keeper urged with a wink.

But the little blonde wasn’t having any of it. There were several minutes of tense negotiations between keeper and youngest child, after Ali had started walking towards the baggage carousel again with the other three kids close by. She wisely held onto Dodge’s hand and kept Josie and Drew in front of her where she could see them. Ashlyn and Lily finally settled on the toddler dragging her backpack behind her. It wasn’t a complete win for either of them and as much as the keeper hated the disrespect shown towards both herself and the backpack, she knew when to cut bait. 

“God I hate flying with kids” she muttered to herself as they followed behind Ali and the other children.

As the two moms stood there waiting for their luggage, the kids happily telling Chris and Tammye all about their flight, Ali bumped her shoulder into her wife’s and smiled at her when the frazzled keeper turned her head.

“We’re almost there babe” her smile broadened at the thought. “If you want to go sit down over there with them I’ll get the bags...”

“Nope” Ashlyn shook her head decisively. “I need a little distance right now.”

Ali leaned up and kissed her wife’s cheek. She would never admit it but she loved how discombobulated her keeper got with the kids in the airport. Something about the two things together just made Ashlyn lose her cool every time and the brunette found it endearing. Ali was often the first one of them to get upset with the kids for something and she loved that her wife was always the short-tempered one when they travelled as a family. It was nice to know the blonde had human levels of patience after all.

They were staying at Carol and Tammye’s beach house for 5 days, then driving to Miami on December 30th so they could go to the club with Deb and Mike for New Year’s Eve. Ali and Ashlyn hadn’t been to the club for New Year’s Eve since Ali was pregnant with Drew. They had tried to go again when she was pregnant with Josie but that was the year of the Miami monsoon and they ended up playing games in Deb’s living room and watching the ball drop on tv instead. They had spent two other NYEs in Florida since then, the very next one at Satellite Beach after spending Josie’s first Christmas in Miami. And then two years ago, the twins’ first NYE, they were all at Walt Disney World celebrating the New Year together. Both Ali and Ashlyn were excited to spend the day and night at the club again and share the fun experience with their kids too.

But before Miami came 5 relaxing days on the beach with the Harris clan. It never seemed like enough time. Ever. Whenever Ashlyn made the trip to Florida, part of her never wanted to leave. She knew some of that was nostalgia and love for her family and her history. And she knew a lot of it was just how much she dreaded the return flight home with the four kids. Somehow flying home was twice as hard and took three times as long as flying down to Florida did. It never failed. But the first order of business that Friday afternoon was Christmas presents. Ali didn’t even bother to unpack anything besides the essential kid-required things, like sippy cups, before letting the magic of Christmas cure all of their travel ails. Ashlyn spent ten minutes reminding the three youngest kids where the potty was. Dodge wasn’t quite potty trained yet but he was almost there. The timing of the trip wasn’t great and both moms were afraid it would set their youngest son back on his journey out of diapers. But what could you do? Just make the best of it. He was a smart kid and they were both hopeful that he would be ok using a different potty in three different houses while they were in Florida. If not, they’d start again when they got home.

Beth and the kids had been waiting for them with Carol, Mike and Lydia and the beach house stayed busy and boisterous for all five days. It was the week between Christmas and New Year’s so the kids were home from school and most of the adults were off too. Chris and Beth still worked at the surf shop and the flower shop respectively, but only for a couple of the days. Everyone wanted to spend as much time as possible together that trip, even Lydia was around much more than usual. 2025 had been a very busy year for the Kriegers and they hadn’t made it down to Florida at all until this trip. The year before, 2024, had been the first time in years that they hadn’t visited Florida for at least some part of the Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Year’s Eve holiday gauntlet. They hadn’t been back since the huge Disney vacation and then subsequent vacation from vacation two Januaries ago. This year, Tammye and Carol had come up to Gloucester to help out while Ali and Ashlyn were in Germany and then again for Thanksgiving and the week afterwards when Ashlyn had her knee surgery. Chris and Beth had made the trip north to celebrate at Ashlyn’s 40th birthday bash Labor Day weekend. But that had been it for Harris family get-togethers. They all felt the distance that year but realized it was only going to get more and more difficult to find time together as the kids got older and started doing more things like sports and music and other activities. Lizzy would be turning 6 years old at the end of January and Johnny was already 8-1/2 years old. Time was flying by and it made them all cling to one another a little more than usual that visit. 

The kids had sleepovers almost every night, usually at the beach house but even once at Chris and Beth’s house. Ashlyn never wanted her kids to skip spending time at Gram’s old house. She would insist on taking them there every single visit until the day she died. They never met the woman who had meant so much to their Mama, but Ashlyn was determined to help them know her. And that started with her house and yard. Beth and Chris had managed to keep Gram’s flower garden growing in the backyard without changing too much about it. They both knew that Gram would have wanted them to make it their own. But they had already done that with the house – Chris did his best to make sure her garden stayed the same. He knew Ashlyn agreed with him and appreciated all of his efforts there.

“This is where I learned my love of flowers” the keeper had confessed to her big brother one morning as she helped him tend the garden. “I always took it for granted but she’s the one that taught me to appreciate their beauty and their strength.”

“Yeah, me too” the big man grunted as he straightened his back and tossed some weeds onto a big gardening tray. “I almost let it go this past year, the kids are so busy now it’s hard to keep up with all their games and clubs and meetings” he chuckled as he dropped a leftover weed onto his sister’s back as she knelt gingerly in the garden next to him. “But I just couldn’t do it. I felt like...like my heart would just ache too much if it wasn’t here and looking good. You know?”

“I do know” she nodded and felt the weed move on her back as she started to stand up. “Thank you so much for keeping it up Chris. And, before you ever decide not to, let me know. Maybe we can find somebody to take care of it for us...” she reached behind her back to try and grab whatever was there, just grazing the end of the weed with her fingertip. She shrieked when she saw the terrified look on her brother’s face.

“Jesus Bash, what is that?!” he yelled and pointed at her back with fake fear in his eyes.

“Get it off!! Get it off!!” she screamed as she jumped to her feet, wincing at the throb in her knee, and started running in a tight circle in front of her brother. “Come on Chris!! Get it off!!!”

It was only when she was able to focus her panicked eyes on his face that she could see the mischievous grin there. She knew she had fallen for one of his tricks and had it confirmed when he finally burst out laughing. It was one of his big, deep belly laughs that the whole neighborhood could hear and tears sprang to his eyes as he doubled over and slapped his own knee.

“Oh my God sis...your face!” he gasped out through more laughter, pointing at his sister’s now red and furious face.

“You’re such a jerk” she spit out and flung the weed she had grabbed from her back, into his neck. “Asshole.”

“Oh God” he continued to laugh and carry on about his sister’s hysterical antics. “Soooo funny...” he pointed at her again which only made her even more angry.

“You made me tweak my knee you jackass” the keeper said with some heat as she pushed his shoulder hard.

He lost his balance, still laughing and shaking through big tears. 

“Whoa, now...just simmer down” he choked out between laughs, realizing how pissed off his sister actually was. “It was just a little fun...”

“Fun for you maybe. Fucking prick!” she said through gritted teeth and pushed him again, even harder.

The big man fell backwards, flinging his arms out to his sides like a kid playing pretend airplane as he tried to catch his balance. His arms spun wildly as his bulk kept falling farther back.

“Oh are you so delicate now you can’t take a little joke?” he jabbed with his words on his way backwards. “Poor little sissy, got her feelings hurt” he teased wickedly.

It was a scene right out of any of a thousand days of their childhood. They poked and prodded and teased each other until one of them got physically injured or emotionally upset. Then the good-natured joking escalated to a full-on battle. Every time. The battle would last until one of them became even more injured or until Gram or Gramps came out and put a stop to it, standing inside the screen porch and yelling at the two siblings.

“Not my feelings, my knee!” she growled at him and gave him one more big push, planting both hands into his chest and glaring at him as they were face to face.

Chris yelped and fell back onto the grass with a loud thud. Ashlyn felt the impact in her legs as the ground shook beneath them. As she paused for a split second to consider the fact that she didn’t really want to hurt him, he flailed his arms forward and pulled her down with him. They landed in a heap, Chris getting sandwiched between the ground and his angry sister.

“Oooof, Jesus you’re heavy” he gasped out as he locked his arms behind her upper back, pinning her against him and not letting her move.

“Ow! My fucking knee!” she groaned and pinched his chest hard with both hands that were still in place from when she pushed him.

“Ow! Shit! Quit pinching me! You’re such a girl!”

“Well let my arms go so I can punch you like I want to you asshole!”

“Not gonna happen sis. Ow!” he winced again in pain at two more pinches. “What else you got?” he challenged as he started to roll them over.

“Your nuts are next! Let me go or my knee will crush them up into your tiny little skull!”

“Oh no, not your knee” he teased in a high-pitched, sing-songy voice that he knew his sister hated. “Not your poor delicate knee...”

He had only gotten so cocky because he knew he was about to pin her down beneath him and render her completely defenseless. They both knew it. They were chest to chest and face to face, both panting and breathing hard under the exertion of their impromptu and immature wrestling match.

“Are you two kidding me?” Beth’s voice called sharply from the screen porch where she stood with Lily on her hip.

“There are some little ears here who, along with the rest of the neighborhood, are wondering who could be out here causing such a commotion” Ali chimed in, not amused at all the foul language that the kids had just heard.

“Knock it off Chris” Beth’s command was clear and both she and her husband knew she meant business.

“But she’s being a baby” he tried to plead his case as they continued rolling around. “Can’t even take a little joke. It was just a fu...”

“Christopher Ryan Harris, if you say one more bad word...” his wife threatened, stepping out of the screen porch and on to the patio to emphasize how serious she was.

As soon as the screen porch door opened, all the kids ran through it and towards the pig pile already in action. It was as if someone had just opened flood gates and a mighty river had passed through.

“Here they come Ash” Ali tried to warn her keeper so the grown-ups didn’t accidentally kick one of the children.

“Chris...” Beth started again but couldn’t finish. Lily squirmed in her arms and she let the little girl down to join the rest of her siblings and cousins. “Oh boy” she said softly as her face broke into a broad smile at the scene in front of her.

“You can say that again” Ali chuckled and stood next to her on the patio with her own grin. “This oughta be good.”

“What in the world is going on out here?” Tammye asked as she and Carol joined them. They had just parked the car and come into the house, following the sound of the ruckus. “You can hear them all the way up the street” her eyes were wide as she saw both her children and all of her grandchildren wrestling around in the backyard. “Oh geez” she rolled her eyes and smiled at her daughters-in-law before focusing on the scene again.

It took both Ashlyn and Chris a minute to calm themselves down, but the sound of the kids laughing and squealing in delight as they climbed up Ashlyn and onto Chris’ strong back sped the process right along. The siblings shared a moment of intense eye contact, Chris’ brown eyes telling his sister he was sorry and that he loved her and that he missed her and that he was glad to see her. Ashlyn’s hazel eyes echoed the sentiments back with a soft blink and they knew they were ok. As always, Chris pushed his sister to toughen up and be better. And, as always, Ashlyn challenged her brother and wouldn’t let him get away with anything.

“It’s been a month, your knee is fine. Quit babying it and it’ll feel better” he whispered, only inches from her face, his words full of concern and tough love.

“Thank you for keeping her garden” she replied, just as softly.

And just as quickly as it had sprung up, the disagreement had settled down. Some of the most tender and meaningful moments those two had ever shared had come at times just like that. After a hurt or a harsh word or a flat-out fight. They both knew it, and if they thought long enough about it, they would realize that Chris had started it just to get to this very point. And Ashlyn had escalated it to make sure they got there. These two who had always been there for each other as they grew up in less than ideal circumstances, they knew no matter how much time had passed between visits they would be there the same way for the rest of their lives.

“Who’s this on my back?” Chris sat up, released his sister’s arms and started controlling most of the pig pile action just as the kids started to really get into it. 

Ashlyn smiled up at him when she saw him move his left arm back to protect her right knee from any incidental kid contact. He kept it there like a buffer while warding off all the other kid advances with his other arm, playfully encouraging and teasing them at the same time. She used her own arms to protect her head and toss toddlers aside, joining in with her brother’s banter. There were so many giggles and gasping laughs from the children that it was hard to hear Chris or Ashlyn at times. The only four adults watched from the patio with smiles and grins on their faces. They all knew it was only a matter of time before somebody got kicked or punched or landed on and the tears started. But until then, they were going to enjoy the sweet moment and drink it all in.

“Man I wish we could live two places at once” Ali said dreamily as she watched and laughed.

“So do we” Beth agreed and put her arm around the brunette’s shoulders, “so do we.”


	44. New Year's Eve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter gang.  
> But Part 7 is already in the works.  
> The Tumblr blog is still up and running too. There have been some really interesting questions there and I've done my best to answer them.  
> Thank you very much for reading this story all this time. I appreciate your time and your devotion to the characters.

“What do you mean you’re not coming down?” Ali’s voice was short as she did her best to mask her irritation and disappointment.

“I mean we can’t come for New Year’s Eve Alex” Kyle replied sadly. “I’m really sorry. We were both looking forward to doing all of the games at the club with the kids and everything.”

For some reason the news was making the brunette indescribably upset. She was quiet as she fought with her emotions, trying desperately to sound ok as she talked with her brother on the phone two days after Christmas. It had been so nice having Kyle and Nathan at the big old house with them for a few days before Christmas that maybe she let her heart get too excited about spending time with them again the week later.

“Sis, please say something” he pleaded quietly into the phone from his condo in New York City.

“I can’t” she choked out in a whisper, trying to hold her tears inside. She was down in the basement bedroom she and Ashlyn shared when they stayed at Tammye and Carol’s beach house and she didn’t have a lot of time to fall apart. It was almost dinner time and she had to get back upstairs. “I’m sorry BB.”

“Awwww, don’t cry Al, you’re killing me” Kyle groaned and fought his own emotions as they rose up into his throat. “We just can’t go. We’re not allowed to take the foster kids out of state without special permission and there’s not time to get it approved...”

“Oh Ky, you don’t have to explain it” she sniffled and pinched the bridge of her nose. “I’m not mad at you, I’m just disappointed because I was really looking forward to it” she took a deep breath, held it for a few seconds and then let it out. “I think it’s great that you’re finally getting a foster kid. You’d better not say no or they’ll probably never ask you again” she chuckled and tried to lighten the mood. “You’re right where you’re supposed to be. I’m really proud of you.”

It was true. Kyle and Nathan had waited so long to get officially approved as foster parents and then waited to be asked to take in a foster child that they didn’t dare say no. It had been a last-minute call that they received from the NY CPS (Child Protective Services) as they were driving back to New York the day after Christmas. There was a child, a little girl, who would be coming to stay with them on a short-term basis starting Sunday December 28th. Both men were nervous but excited to be able to finally get involved and try and help some child who needed a safe place to live for however long. And, in true parenting fashion, their personal plans would just have to take a back seat. 

//

The Satellite Beach and Melbourne Beach part of the vacation flew by. Before they knew it, they were enjoying their last beach day. The next day, Tuesday the 30th, they would make the three-hour drive to Miami to get ready for their big NYE day at the club. Deb and Mike Christopher had two extra spots available since Kyle and Nathan had cancelled and Ashlyn and Ali had convinced Chris and Beth to come along with the kids too. But before that, they spent all day Monday at the beach, the whole Harris clan including Ashlyn’s cousins whom they hadn’t seen in a long time. Once Gram had passed, Aunt Marie had kept her distance from her brother Mike’s family and nobody really minded. Chris kept in touch with David and Carlin and they were happy to get to spend time with Ashlyn’s family for a change. It was a beautiful weather day and they all had a wonderful time. Even the kids seemed to be better-behaved than usual and managed to stay out of trouble for most of the day. It was one of the best days Ashlyn and Ali had spent as young parents and they would remember it for years to come. Nothing particularly special happened, they all just got along well and played together well and enjoyed each other’s company.

“I think I owe you an apology” Tammye spoke softly from her low folding chair next to the beach blanket. 

“For what?” Ashlyn, laying on her stomach on the beach blanket, lifted her head up off her forearms and looked back at her mother with confusion on her face.

“I’ve never let you talk to me about... my hands” she paused and swallowed, finding it difficult to bring up even though it was exactly what she intended to do once the twins were napping and things had quieted down a bit. “And that’s not really fair to you. To tell you you’re probably going to go through the same thing and then refuse to tell you anything about it...” she shook her head as she held her daughter’s gaze. “I’m sorry honey.”

“Mom, it’s ok” the keeper reached her arm out and patted her mother’s bare foot. She kept her head on her other forearm and didn’t look away. “I know you don’t like talking about it. I respect that. It’s no big deal.”

“But I think it is a big deal” Tammye quirked her eyebrow. “And I just want you to know that you can ask me anything you want to about it. Any time you have questions. I mean it Ashlyn.”

“Ali talked to you” the keeper groaned, pulled her arm back and returned her face to her forearms again, looking off towards the sea. She watched Chris, Carlin and Ali playing in the water with Johnny, Drew and Carlin’s 3-year old daughter Olivia, while Lizzy and Josie were digging holes in the sand with Carol and Beth and David. “She shouldn’t have done that.”

“Why not? I’m glad she did. I had no idea it was bothering you so much...”

“It’s not bothering me so much” Ashlyn replied shortly and then closed her eyes with regret. She knew she had revealed the truth just by the way she had spoken to her mother. “It’s not that big a deal mom, I promise.”

“Well let’s make sure it never becomes one” Tammye stretched her foot out and poked her daughter’s hip with it. “I’m sure you have a million questions and I want to answer them. It would have been easier for me if I had been smart enough to talk to my own mother about it before she died. But I can’t change that mistake either” she sighed quietly and Ashlyn turned her head to face her again. “So let’s you and me not do the same dumb thing, ok kiddo?”

It took a few minutes for Ashlyn to warm up to the idea. She had been completely relaxed and pretty stress-free before her mother brought up something that had contributed to her most recent struggle. The osteo-arthritis that Ashlyn knew was coming for her hadn’t been the sole catalyst to her latest funk, but it had been one of the main contributors. Ashlyn hadn’t even realized how much it worried her until she blurted it out in Mattie’s office that day with Ali. Tammye didn’t give up though. When her stubborn daughter refused to ask her questions at first, she just started telling her how it had started for her and what it had felt like in the early days. Gradually, the keeper began to engage and ask questions, learning a ton of information that she had never been able to find in any books or on any websites. Tammye shared with her what it felt like on good days and on bad days. Ashlyn got the inside scoop on what she might expect if her hands really did fall victim to osteo-arthritis like her mother’s and grandmother’s had. 

“Everything good here?” Ali asked breathlessly as she picked up a towel and started to dry herself off. 

She had been boogie boarding and doing a pretty good job with her 360s out there. After surfing, boogie boarding all of a sudden seemed a heck of a lot easier for the brunette. They were also able to do more of it up in Gloucester so she had more practice with it too. No-one would ever mistake her for a real surfer, but she had a nice repertoire of turns and, now, a legitimate 360 spin too. Ali looked from one woman to the other and knew immediately that her wife was upset with her for asking Tammye to talk to her. 

“This one’s mad at me, so that means you’re at least talking about it. Good” the brunette chuckled, took a step closer to Ashlyn and shook her wet, shoulder-length locks all over her keeper’s bare back.

“Hey, geez Al” the keeper whined and rolled away while her mother laughed.

“We’re good, aren’t we?” Tammye gave her daughter a warm smile and was glad to see it returned.

“Yeah, we’re good” Ashlyn motioned between she and her mother. “But you’re in trouble” she gave her wife a hard look.

“That’s ok” Ali replied with an easy smile, “as long as you got the information you need, I can take it.”

Try as Ashlyn might, she couldn’t keep a small smile from gracing her lips as she looked up at her beautiful brunette. The fact that her body was covered by only the thin material of a one-piece bathing suit and was wet and wild from the ocean had not escaped the keeper either. How could she be upset with a gorgeous woman who had devoted so much time and energy to learning her own favorite hobby? It was a dream come true and Ashlyn knew it, just as she knew the smile on her face was now bright and broad as she appreciated just how beautiful her wife still was. Sure, neither one of them were in the shape they used to be. There just wasn’t enough time in the day sometimes to get everything done and workouts had been one of the first to go. But they were both getting better about it, making the time and trying to workout together. Ashlyn missed the tiny bikinis her wife used to wear, but she still looked great in the one-piece suits she wore now instead. The only reason Ali didn’t wear bikinis anymore was because of her stretchmarks and Ashlyn knew it. She probably wouldn’t wear bikinis that were quite so tiny, but she could wear the hell out of a more modest bikini every damned day. Ashlyn told her so, often. But she never made her feel bad about her choice. As had always been her way, the keeper made sure her wife knew just how fucking gorgeous she was, regardless of what she was wearing or why.

“Mommy! Mommy!” Lily called out as she ran towards the beach blanket from the beach house.

“Lily girl!” Ali waved back and grinned as their youngest child made her way through the sand with a determined look on her face.

Tammye and Ashlyn both turned to look back at the house and saw Carol walking across the deck with Dodge in her arms.

“Oh, I was going to get them up” the keeper looked at her phone to see the time. “How did it get so late?”

“That’s what happens when your wife comes up with a good idea” Tammye winked at her daughter as she got up out of her chair.

Tammye patted Lily on her head as they passed each other, the grandmother heading towards the house, the granddaughter only a few steps away from the beach blanket. Dodge wanted down as soon as he saw his sister running towards his moms and Carol obliged with a loving tap to his cute little bum. Ashlyn watched Lily throw herself against Ali’s legs and smiled as the brunette bent over and hugged the girl. Dodge was making good progress and was fast approaching the beach blanket while Tammye met her girlfriend at the foot of the steps to the deck. The keeper watched Carol wrap her mother up in a hug after Tammye kissed her soundly on the lips. It made her happy that her mom was clearly feeling more comfortable in her own skin and she thanked God for the millionth time that Carol had come into their lives.

“Mama what you doin?” Lily asked as she moved towards the keeper who was still lying on her side, all stretched out to her full length.

“I’m relaxing Miss Thing, what are you doing?”

“Had a nap” she nodded as she began to climb onto Ashlyn’s hip, trying to pull her over onto her stomach again. “Wanna lie on you.”

“How do you ask?” Ali corrected as she braced herself to receive Dodge’s impact.

“Peeeeeese?”

“Such nice manners” Ashlyn praised her. “I’d be happy to roll over when you ask me so nicely.”

“Mommy!”

“Oooof. Hi big boy” Ali groaned as she lifted Dodge up and held him against her chest for a minute.

He grinned and patted her biceps, one in each tiny hand, as he nuzzled his head into her neck.

“How was your nap sweetie?” the brunette asked softly as she kissed his blonde, curly head. 

“Good.”

Lily had indeed climbed on top of Ashlyn’s back and laid herself out there, both hands playing with the short hair at the back of the keeper’s neck. Ashlyn looked down towards the water and saw Drew and Josie swimming with Chris, Carlin and David. She knew she had nothing to worry about with her brother watching them. It was an incredible feeling.

“Ow Lily, what are you doing up there?” the keeper groaned and tried to look behind her without any luck.

“Watch your feet” Ali cautioned as she watched Lily turn herself around so her head was down near Ashlyn’s thighs and her feet up near her head. “Don’t kick Mama now” she caught Lily’s eye and made sure she understood. “And you better hope Mama doesn’t toot or she’ll send you right up to the moon!” she giggled along with both twins.

“Mama, no toot” Dodge laughed again and wiggled to get out of Ali’s arms.

“Hey, we all know who toots the most in this family” she quirked her eyebrow at her wife. “And it’s definitely not me.”

Dodge joined his sister but was disappointed that he wouldn’t fit on Ashlyn’s back too. He turned his attention to her legs and promptly went and sat on the back of her knees.

“Be careful of Mama’s knee honey” Ali picked him up almost immediately and slid him back onto her calves instead. “Stay there if you want to sit on her legs, but don’t sit on her knees.”

“Do I get a say in any of this?” Ashlyn chuckled and rested her head back on her forearms.

“Mama’s ship” Lily patted the back of her mother’s right thigh, looking at her ship tattoo upside down.

“Yep” Ali said as she sat down next to her wife’s knees, determined to protect them from both kids. “That’s Mama’s ship” she smiled as she watched Lily’s small fingers trace down the mainmast and then back up the foremast. “Can you see your name there?” she met Lily’s curious eyes, that looked just like Ashlyn’s, and loved the way they sparkled back at her with excitement.

Drew and Josie could both find their names on the ‘Mary Sarah’ but the twins were still just learning their letters. And the names were pretty small so it’s not like they jumped out at little 2-1/2 year old eyes. Ali leaned over and moved her own finger to the mainmast.

“’Andrew Holatka Krieger’” she read as she traced over Drew’s name there.

Dodge and Lily were both watching carefully, as if their Mommy was revealing the coolest secret in the whole world. He got excited when Ali said his brother’s name and squeezed his fingers into Ashlyn’s left thigh without much thought.

“Ouch!” she yelped and lifted her calves up to get her son’s attention. “No pinching!”

“Sorry Mama” Dodge sweetly patted her thighs after Ali cocked her head at him.

“Thank you Dodger” Ashlyn called over her shoulder and winked at her wife.

Ali smiled at the keeper and then moved her finger back to the tattoo, tracing Josie’s name on the foremast.

“’Josephine Marie Krieger’”

“Jojo” Lily said excitedly.

“That’s right” Ali grinned at how cute both kids were. “Your names are on the booms...”

“Boom!” Dodge shouted and clapped his hands.

“Yep” the brunette chuckled as she moved her finger to the bottom of the mainsail where one boom was located. She traced Dodge’s name. “’Dodge Christopher Krieger’.”

“Me!!” Dodge yelled exuberantly, bouncing a little bit on Ashlyn’s calves.

“Can you see the letters honey?” Ali asked her son, encouraging him to try and locate his name without her finger guiding him.

Dodge reached out his pudgy little hand and held it over the tattoo for a few seconds as the brunette watched him intently. He giggled and brought his hand down in a strong pat, roughly covering the general area of the boom.

“It’s ok, they’re hard letters to see here. They’re pretty small. Good try Dodgie” Ali squeezed his arm and poked his belly. “Let’s see if we can find Lily’s name next.”

“Yours is on the other boom, baby girl” Ashlyn jumped in. “Can you see it?”

“’Lilian Isabella Krieger’” Ali read aloud, moving her finger along the boom at the bottom of the foresail and watching Lily’s eyes follow it closely.

“Me” the little girl said softly and sweetly, looking at her mother for confirmation.

“That’s right sweetheart” Ali leaned forward and kissed her head as Lily moved both her hands all over the tattoo.

“Such smarties” Ashlyn added. “I love how smart you guys are.”

“Where Meggie?” Dodge asked, his little arms up in a questioning shrug as he looked right into Ali’s face for the answer.

It was a very good question and one that neither of the other kids had asked before. Ever. Neither Ashlyn nor Ali said anything for a full minute. Ali honestly didn’t know the answer and Ashlyn was too busy beating herself up for allowing such a huge oversight to happen.

“Ash?” the brunette prompted her gently after that long minute went by.

“Yeah, umm...” she stammered and Ali could tell the question had rocked her keeper’s world. “I just haven’t found the right spot for it yet” she finally answered. “Where do you guys think would be the best place to get Meg’s name put on there?”

Both kids started talking and poking at the ‘Mary Sarah’ as they debated the question. Ali rested her hand on the back of her wife’s closest knee and rubbed it gently with her thumb as she watched the twins consider the tattoo. Ashlyn’s heart felt like it was going to explode from the pain banging around inside it. How had she never thought to include Meg’s fucking name on that tattoo? The good news was that it was an easy enough fix. Maybe she would even involve Meg in the location selection. She could make the tattoo appointment during Meg’s February visit and bring the teenager with her even. Her mind was racing but she was dimly aware of Ali crawling towards her head. She bent down and pressed a kiss into Ashlyn’s cheek and then whispered in her ear.

“There’s lots of room for another name, love. Don’t be upset.”

//

Wednesday, December 31st was a big, beautiful, busy day that started far too early for the grown-ups who knew exactly how long it was going to last. Dodge was still their early riser so Ali wasn’t really surprised when she opened her eyes to the curly-haired blonde boy standing in front of her face at 6am. He didn’t make a sound. He just gave her the smallest smile and stood up on his tip toes while his little hands supported him on the edge of the couch. 

“Hi baby boy” the brunette’s voice was quiet and raspy from sleep but her own smile was impossible to keep from her face at the adorable sight. 

Along with the little pats he gave when he was held in someone’s arms, this was Dodge’s cutest thing. As soon as he was physically able to get out of bed and open the master bedroom door, he had started going to his mothers’ bed and standing next to Ali’s, or Ashlyn’s if Ali was already in the shower, face. He waited for them to open their eyes and invite him into bed for some snuggles before it was time to get up for breakfast. 6:30 – 6:45am was usually the time he came for his snuggles. He was up extra early today. The brunette lifted the sheet and blanket and scooched back against the back of the couch so she could make room for him on the L-shaped couch in Deb’s living room. The three extra bedrooms were full and Ali and Ashlyn had won the battle with Chris and Beth for the living room couch. It wasn’t a pull-out so Ashlyn had stretched out on one side of the couch and Ali had taken the shorter side, their heads on pillows in the L-bend corner, still close to each other. The keeper was flat on her back with her head turned towards the back of her half of the couch and Ali was laying on her right side. Dodge climbed up, momentarily excited by the fact that he could do it himself on the low couch and not need his mom’s help like he did back at home.

“Go back to sleep sweetheart, it’s too early to be awake yet” she cooed and kissed the side of his head as he lay flat on his back and let her pull him into her front.

They might have actually made it to 7am but Deb had gotten up to make coffee and start breakfast at 6:30am and once the little boy heard her in the kitchen he wiggled out from underneath his mommy’s arm and scampered to his Grandma.

“What is it with early risers?” Ashlyn groaned as she rolled over to face the back of the couch and pulled her own sheet and blanket up over her head.

They almost fell back asleep but just as the keeper was about to drift off again she felt something big and heavy hit her top shoulder and then settle onto her head.

“Rise and shine sleepy heads” Chris’ big voice filled the room as he admired the accuracy of the throw pillow he had just launched at his sister. “Lizzy’s up which means the girls will probably be up soon too” he chuckled. “Just a heads up” he giggled as he let the other throw pillow fly.

“Ok, so we definitely messed up the sleeping arrangements last night” Ashlyn commented later as she sipped her coffee at the kitchen table and tried to help keep the breakfast chaos under control.

Chris and Beth had taken the guest room, and they had all decided to put the three girls into Lori’s old room and the three boys into Donnie’s old room. Everybody was happy about it and had thought it was a good plan. Two kids each got into the double beds and one kid slept on one of the single, kids’ sized air mattresses that Chris and Beth had brought with them. Lizzy took the air mattress for the girls and Dodge had to take it for the boys. There really was no choice because Dodge was such a pain in the neck to sleep with because he moved around all night long and, more often than not, ended up sleeping sideways in whatever bed he was in. That meant that his feet were often kicking whomever he was sharing a bed with. It wasn’t a new scenario, which is why they all knew he was getting the air mattress.

“I’m sorry about the couch honey” Deb apologized as she brought Drew over a plate of waffles with peanut butter on them for his second meal choice of the morning. “We’ll go get a big air mattress today...”

“No, the couch was fine” the blonde clarified quickly. “I mean we need to put the early risers” she glared playfully at Lizzy and Dodge, making them both giggle, “in the same bedroom with Johnny, because he sleeps like a rock. Then Drew, Josie and Lily can take the other room and get their sleep.”

“And you just might end up in that bedroom too?” Deb teased as she moved past Ali who was cutting up fruit at the counter.

“Well that might be better for everybody” Chris chimed in with a gleeful look on his face. “She could use a little more beauty sleep.”

“Nice, Jack-a...”

“She does not need any more beauty sleep” Ali said loudly, interrupting her wife’s rebuttal as she carried the cutting board to the table and handed it to Beth to divvy up among the kids. “She’s already gorgeous enough” the brunette defended her keeper and kissed her lips with more intent than she normally would at the breakfast table.

She gave her an extra peck before pulling away and moving back to the counter, looking over her shoulder to enjoy the surprised but besotted look on the blonde’s face.

“Oh, it’s going to be such a great day” Deb’s enthusiasm was impossible to resist, even at 7:15am.

She wasn’t wrong either. They spent the morning getting everybody fed and dressed and ready before walking en masse to the nearby park in Deb’s neighborhood. Everybody, even the bigger kids like 8-1/2 year old Johnny, 6-1/2 year old Drew, and almost 6-year old Lizzy, still enjoyed a good swing. Josie, Lily and Dodge still considered swinging a high-value goal for any playtime and would gladly let any adult in their lives push them until their arms fell off or their backs gave out. They all went back to the house for an early lunch and then headed to the club as soon as the NYE Day event officially began at 12pm.

Typically, the Christophers and their guests had signed up for and participated in grown-up activities at the big NYE Day celebration. But this year they had signed up for almost every kid-friendly thing the club offered, and there were lots. The theme for this year was a good, old-fashioned barbecue and there were red and white checkered tablecloths and curtains and napkins everywhere you looked. The raging debate all day long, among all of the club members, not just the Christophers’ crew, was whether it was North Carolina BBQ or Kansas City BBQ and nobody ever came to any kind of conclusion. The only agreement made was that the food was absolutely delicious and it didn’t really matter what kind of BBQ it had been. The club went all out, as usual, and had southern style decorations and music and costumes for the staff and servers. Whatever Deb and Mike paid for attending was more than worth it. Their whole group was treated like royalty, as was every other group that enjoyed the day. There was a childcare room and a separate napping room that had always been available but the Kriegers had never noticed because they had never needed them before. Ashlyn was reminded of the family-friendly amenities they had experienced at Disney World as she and Ali carried the tuckered out twins into the napping room at 2pm. They had been torn about how to handle naps that day and decided to let Dodge and Lily get to the club and experience a few games and activities before putting them down for a 2-hour nap instead of their usual 3-hour one. It was a gamble to shorten it but they didn’t want the kids to miss out on the whole afternoon either. Both moms knew they were setting up a potential whine-fest around dinner time, particularly with Lily, but they agreed to just deal with that if it happened. Hopefully, when it was time, the twins would be tired enough to go to sleep easily back at Deb’s house for the night. 

Chris and Beth couldn’t believe all the fun things to do at the club and they had a blast playing games and participating in activities with all the kids. Mike was more hands-on than usual, especially with the bigger kids. He and Johnny competed in a pretty intense miniature golf tournament and they both seemed to have a great time. Deb and Beth cheered them on the whole time. The most popular event, besides the big obstacle course that was the main event every year, was water balloon dodge ball. There were age limits so everybody was playing from a similar size and coordination level, but all of the kids loved it. Drew was particularly good at it and both Ali and Ashlyn took pride in his good throwing motion and stronger than expected arm. They played Giant Jenga, and Lawn Twister and frisbee Tic Tac Dough and some epic games of Cornhole. There were outdoor chess tables, checker tables and dominoes tables with dominoes being the most popular with the Krieger kids. Dodge and Josie took a real interest in the dominoes and Ali made a mental note to buy some of their own when they got home. 

Ali and Chris got badgered into playing in a 2-person beach volleyball game but didn’t do well enough to make the round robin tournament. They made a pretty good team with Chris’ height and size dominating the net while Ali darted around behind him hustling after everything that made it past him. Ashlyn loved watching her wife compete in anything, but especially if it was an actual physical sport or challenge. And it wasn’t just because she enjoyed watching the brunette’s body. There was something about the way Ali was willing to sacrifice anything and everything for her team to achieve the victory. It was something another athlete and competitor appreciated more than almost anything else. It had been 8 years since Ali, Ashlyn, Kyle and Nico had played beach volleyball at the club together and Ali felt every single one of them when she and Chris were finished. They had played three games and her thighs were burning before they had even finished the second one.

“Nice game Krieger” Chris high-fived her as they dragged their exhausted bodies off the sandy court.

“You too Harris” she grinned at him and then stuck her tongue out in a goofy, exhausted face.

“No shit huh” he lowered his voice and put his arm around her shoulders. They were both drenched in sweat and still panting for breath. “These fucking 40s are no joke.”

“Oh thank God it’s not just me” she laughed out loud and leaned into the sweaty hug.

The twins were only fussy for about fifteen minutes after their moms woke them up from their naps. Both kids looked like they wanted to murder whomever had woken them up, but their attitudes softened after some snuggling and juice in the childcare room with Ali and Ashlyn. Dodge snapped out of his mood faster than Lily did and was his usual energetic and fun self as soon as they rejoined the rest of the group. Lily sulked for a little bit longer, insisting on being held even though she was closer to 3 years old than 2 years old and was heavier than she looked. Ali did her best for as long as she could with the extra 35 pounds, wanting to spare Ashlyn’s knee because it had already had an active day that wasn’t going to let up anytime soon. Chris came to the rescue and took his youngest niece in his arms. He whispered sweet loving things to her and then lifted her shirt and blew a big, wet raspberry into her belly that made her giggle. Everybody gathered for dinnertime and Chris kept the fussy Lily and helped her with her food, taking cues and advice from Ali as she moved through the incredible BBQ buffet with Josie. Ashlyn did the same with Dodge while Deb took care of Drew’s challenging mealtime experience. The Grandmother could feel her daughter-in-law’s tension as she followed Deb and Drew in the line.

“Just relax and take care of that one” Deb turned and spoke quietly to Ashlyn over her shoulder. “I’ve got Drew, don’t you worry about it tonight.”

“But...”

“I’ve got him” Deb gave her a hard look that turned quickly into a grin.

Beth and Lizzy moved through the line with Mike and his new buddy Johnny right behind them. Ali and Ashlyn exchanged a quick look and the brunette shrugged with a smile. She wasn’t going to complain about helping one of their two best eaters and she hoped Ashlyn wouldn’t either. It was a rare blessing to enjoy a mealtime without having to argue and negotiate with Drew and Lily to get them to eat their goddamned food and both women appreciated it. It may have been one of the nicest Christmas gifts either of them received that year. And the food...Ashlyn gave up her North Carolina BBQ rant as soon as the first piece of succulent food hit her tongue. It was the most delicious BBQ she had ever eaten and that was coming from a woman who lived in North Carolina for five years. They stuffed themselves until they could barely move, which was a bad idea because after dinner came the dancing up in the beautiful ballroom. Thankfully, the kids wanted to dance too and that meant lots of slow shuffling and not too many crazy dance moves. Ali was definitely not entering the limbo contest this year, that was for sure. They watched the sun set over the ocean as they finished eating at big picnic tables down on the beach. It was only 5:40pm but it felt a lot later for some reason. Maybe those damned early risers. All of the kids were exhausted after a couple hours of dancing and fooling around in the ballroom and on the porch that wrapped around the BBQ themed room with the live, loud country band. Everybody had one last spin around the dance floor and then, at 8:00pm, the Kriegers and Christophers took all six kids home and put them to bed. Chris and Beth objected but were outvoted and out-Kriegered. 

“Just stay here and relax” Mike told them both. “The girls will be back soon if you get too lonely” he joked on his way out.

“We’ll be back as soon as they’re down” Ashlyn added when she saw the look of discomfort on her brother’s face. “Go sign us up for that trivia contest” she instructed, nodding at the woman with the clipboard standing by the door to the back patio. “We’ll kick our wives’ asses” she winked.

It was almost 9:30pm by the time Ali and Ashlyn made it back to the club. It had taken an hour to get the kids settled down enough to go to sleep. They were all completely wiped out and if they had been mature enough to be able to listen to their bodies they would have passed out in the two cars on the ride back to Deb’s house. Instead, they misbehaved on the ride back and let their excitement and the lateness of the hour dictate things. Finally, Mike had to excuse himself from the fray upstairs as Deb, Ali and Ashlyn wrangled the kids into their beds. He just couldn’t take it anymore. Ashlyn was the one who finally broke, her patience long past gone.

“Alright that’s enough!” she yelled in the hallway between the two bedrooms where different kids kept moving back and forth between the bathroom and the bedroom they were supposed to be in and then the other bedroom. “Everybody get your butt in your bed right now and do not leave it again!”

The keeper’s nostrils flared as she turned to face Lily, her little lip quivering on her way to the bathroom. Ashlyn was tempted to enforce her last command because the only reason Lily had to pee at that very moment is because she had refused to even try to pee the four times she had been asked to during the 45 minutes they had been home. The keeper opened her mouth and saw her wife’s face pop out into the hall from the girls’ bedroom. Ali quirked her eyebrow at the blonde and nodded towards the bathroom. Ashlyn knew, without needing any words to leave her wife’s lips, that Ali wanted her to take their daughter to use the potty because she didn’t want to have to deal with her wetting the bed, and probably Josie too. That meant pajama changes for both girls and changing the bed...

“Lilian Isabella” Ashlyn spoke through gritted teeth. “The next time we ask you to use the potty you need to do as you’re told. Do you understand me?”

“Yes mama” she squeaked out, lip still quivering.

“Come on Lily” Deb quietly and quickly ushered her granddaughter into the bathroom so Ashlyn could maintain her bad cop role. It was working like a charm. “Let’s hurry up now and then get to bed.”

“Drew! What did I just say?” Ashlyn barked as she stood in the doorway to the boys’ room and saw her son bouncing on the double bed even though Johnny and Lizzy were both trying to get into it. They didn’t often hear their favorite auntie yell like she was doing that night and they were desperate to follow her instructions. “You’re not even supposed to be in here! Get in the other room and tell Dodge...”

“He’s right here” Ali spoke calmly from right behind her as Dodge squeezed past his Mama and into the room. “Drew, let’s go” she motioned for him with her arm as Ashlyn stepped out of the way.

Both moms were stunned when Drew pushed Dodge down to the ground as they passed by each other.

“Drew!!” Ashlyn’s voice was louder than ever and for the first time in her life she felt the urge to strike one of her own children. She would never act on it but that’s how angry she was at her son’s behavior. “What is the matter with you?!”

Dodge was fighting tears as Ali helped him back to his feet and knelt in front of him. He was excited to sleep in the room with his two cousins and trying so hard to behave himself and do as he was told. He and Lizzy were easily the two best behaved that night which was unusual but very appreciated by both Ali and Ashlyn. 

“Andrew Krieger!” Ali yelled this time as she stood up and grabbed his arm. “You will be punished tomorrow for being mean to your brother. Now apologize, right now, and then get into bed and I don’t want to hear one more peep out of you until tomorrow morning.”

The half-hearted apology didn’t make either mother feel any better but Dodge accepted it and climbed into the air mattress bed. His face was still excited about the new sleeping arrangement and nothing his bratty big brother did would change that. Deb, meanwhile, had brought Lily back into the other bedroom, and gotten she and Josie tucked into the double bed. She helped Drew get into the air mattress in that bedroom, the late sleepers bedroom, and moved into the hall.

“Why don’t I finish up, alright?” she offered calmly as she pulled the two furious moms out of the other bedroom. “You two run along now and have a fun night” she winked. “I’ll call you if I need you, I promise.”

“Thanks mom” Ali said and kissed her cheek as Ashlyn gave her a hug.

They moved a few feet down the hallway towards the stairs and could hear Deb’s calm, soothing voice through the open door.

“You guys know better than to misbehave like that. Your mothers don’t want to yell like that and get all upset, but when you don’t listen to them and when you don’t do what you’re told...” the words drifted away as they descended the stairs.

“Wow, you guys look like you’ve been through the wars” Beth chuckled nervously when they finally made it back to the club at 9:30pm. They had stopped at the bar for strong drinks before joining Chris and Beth on the outdoor patio for the trivia game. “Was it that bad? Please tell me ours weren’t the worst...”

“No, yours were fine” Ashlyn sighed heavily as she sat down. “It was ours that I wanted to kill.”

“Although yours will be sure to tell you how Auntie Ash yelled tonight” Ali added with her own frustrated sigh. “So did I, but just at Drew. Johnny & Lizzy looked shocked and a little scared” she gave Chris and Beth a sheepish shrug.

“Good” Chris nodded. “Sometimes I swear they just won’t listen unless you’re screaming at them. I don’t understand it” he shook his head, chuckled and nudged his sister’s arm. “I hope you scared the shit out of them.”

“Will Deb be ok? Should we head back?” Beth asked, anxiously.

“No, she’s fine. They’ll be fine. I really yelled and I think they’re all too scared to do anything else tonight” the keeper sighed again but this time lighter and with a bit of a smile on her lips. “She’ll call us if she needs us. She’s good about that.”

“Cheers to being kid-free for, hopefully, three or four hours” Ali laughed as she raised her drink up in a toast.

“Cheers to that.”  
“Amen.”  
“God let’s hope so.”

They all agreed and were soon all laughing together after their toast. 

The next two hours were spent drinking, dancing, losing terribly at trivia and then roasting marshmallows down at the embers of the pigroast on the beach. Chris & Beth roasted the marshmallows while Ali and Ashlyn did some shots at the bar. It was cooler that year and Ashlyn and Ali had brought sweatshirts back with them after putting the kids to sleep. The temperature was only in the low 60’s that night and the air was practically crisp – at least for Miami anyway. The club brought out a bunch of beach towels for people to cover up with as they assembled in the Adirondack chairs and chaise lounges on the beach. It was almost time for the fireworks and Chris and Beth had snagged two chairs close enough to the dying fire for some warmth, but not so close that it would impact their view of the show in the sky. Chris loved New Year’s Eve as much as his sister did and it was one of the few nights where he really wished he could still drink. He didn’t want to get drunk or anything, but he wanted to celebrate the close of one year and welcome in the dawn of a new one with a champagne toast. That had always been Gram’s tradition, even if it had just been the three of them, or four of them when Gramps was still alive, in her house in Satellite Beach. She bought one of those small bottles of cheap champagne and it was just enough to fill their glasses, even if hers had twice as much in it as her two grandkids’ glasses did. He could almost taste that cheap, bad champagne on his tongue as he sat there that night with his wife, sister and sister-in-law. 

Ali and Ashlyn had just stumbled down to join them with only two minutes to spare. They hadn’t come from the beach this year though. There had been no walk on the beach to clear their heads or cool off their bodies. They had just done shots of some horrible blue concoction, two each, before dragging themselves away from the dance floor when the singer reminded everybody to head to the beach for the fireworks. It was sort of fitting that even the end of the night at the club that year was different than ever before. Every other part of the day had been different too. It wasn’t different in a bad way, quite the opposite. They had both had a wonderful time sharing the day with their kids and their families. It really had been a terrific day, except for the battlefield on Deb’s second floor that night at bedtime. The brunette was disappointed that they didn’t get their walk on the beach. She even tried to pull her wife that way as they got closer to the chairs and other people gathering by the fire.

“No way sugarplum” Ashlyn slurred a little and shook her head. “We’re not missing the fireworks.”

“But we have time” Ali tugged harder on her wife’s arm, her words not much more coherent than Ashlyn’s.

“One minute to Midnight!” the PA system announced loudly and made everybody pick up their pace to find their seats and get ready.

“Nuh-uh” the keeper shook her head again. “C’mon, we hafta find Chris...” she turned her head and started scanning the chairs for her brother’s large form.

Ali pouted and let out a frustrated huff but allowed her keeper to pull her along towards the chairs. She walked right into the back of Ashlyn’s body when the blonde stopped short to get her bearings.

“Mmmmmm...you’re nice and warm” she purred into Ashlyn’s back as she wrapped her arms around her from behind. “It’s so cold tonight” she pulled her body in tightly and pressed her hips against the keeper’s butt. “Will you warm me up?” she popped the p and playfully bit Ashlyn’s shoulder blade through her t-shirt.

“Ow! That hurt Al” the blonde chuckled as she kept her eyes moving over the half-lit faces all around them. “Put your sweatshirt on baby, that’ll help.”

“Oh yeah, I forgot” Ali giggled and let go of her wife to try and do just that. She lost her balance and almost fell over with a laugh but caught herself at the last second. “Ooopsie.”

“There they are, c’mon” Ashlyn grabbed her arm again and led them to her brother and his wife.

“Geez, talk about cutting it close” Beth laughed as the two mildly drunk women practically landed on her. “You guys ok?” she asked as she got up and moved to the chair Chris was occupying.

“Yep, just a little bit drunk” Ashlyn whispered conspiratorially and tossed three sweatshirts at Chris and Beth. “But don’t tell anybody.”

“Ok, we won’t” Chris chuckled and threw Ashlyn’s sweatshirt back to her, hitting her right in the face and almost knocking her backwards. “One of these is for you too, genius.”

Ali laughed as she watched the interaction, still struggling to get her arms into her own sweatshirt. They ended up helping each other get the warm layer in place, finishing right as the PA announcer warned everyone that they were ten seconds away from beginning the countdown.

“Shit, hurry up babe” Ali stood up so Ashlyn could lie down in the chaise lounge first, like she always did.

“I’m coming, I’m coming” the keeper slid up the chair and stretched out, pulling the back of her sweatshirt all the way down at the same time. “Here we go princess” she lifted her left arm and grinned up at her beautiful brunette, inviting her to take her place in the chair with her.

“I thought I was the queen now?” Ali pretended to pout as she awkwardly got into position. “What did I do to get demoted?”

“Oooof” Ashlyn groaned as her wife leaned her elbow into her left breast on her way down. “Well, there’s that, for one...”

“Ok everybody, here we go!” the PA announcer called out excitedly. “Ten! Nine! Eight!”

“I’m sorry honey” Ali leaned down and kissed Ashlyn’s breast to make it feel better, seemingly oblivious to the dozens of people around them. “I’ll kiss your boo boo and make it all better...”

“Seven! Six! Five!”

“Al, settle down” Ashlyn giggled and moved her right hand and arm over to cover her chest protectively, gently pushing her wife’s face away from her breast. “It started, come on” she encouraged the brunette to get into position.

“Four! Three! Two!”

“I’m sorry” Ali finally lowered herself down and tucked into Ashlyn’s left side while the keeper pulled her in tight and tried to fix the back of her sweatshirt too.

“One! Happy New Year!!!”

Ali had tilted her head up to kiss her keeper’s cheek, oblivious to the countdown, or at least to the speed of it. Just as her lips got close to Ashlyn’s face, the blonde turned her head and spoke softly to the woman of her dreams.

“Happy New Year baby. You make me sooooo happy. I love you more than ever” Ashlyn smiled before bringing their lips together in a slow, romantic NYE kiss that took both their breath away. 

The kiss was sloppier than usual because they were both a little drunk, but it still felt magical. The keeper moved her right hand up to caress Ali’s cheek when she felt the brunette deepen the kiss. Ali’s NYE kisses were always incredible. She always went farther than she usually would in public and she always found a way to get the kiss to travel through Ashlyn’s entire body. Something about NYE and the fireworks just gave everything the extra boost of brilliance it needed to be amazing and special and one of a kind.

“You make me happy too, all the time, every day, even when I’m in a bad mood or I’m mad at you” Ali panted out after the kiss, their faces only an inch apart. “And I love you all the time, every day, even when you’re in a bad mood or you’re mad at me” she took Ashlyn’s lips in another kiss and they almost missed the fireworks display.

“Look honey” Ashlyn pointed to the sky and pulled her head away from her wife. “Fireworks, just for us.”

“Yeah” Ali grinned as she rested her head on Ashlyn’s shoulder and focused on the light show in the sky above them, “our fireworks...just for us.”

//

They hadn’t done any of their usual reflective things on NYE. Instead of their romantic walk on the beach and their heartfelt thoughts about the year that had just passed and the one that was about to commence, they had played trivia with Chris and Beth and then gotten drunk on crazy blue shots at the bar. It hadn’t happened quite the way they had envisioned it, but it had happened just the way they needed. After the stressful bedtime situation they both needed a drink to help relax them and take the edge off. Sometimes that’s what parenthood did to people, even to the very best people. And really, the truth of the matter was, as long as Ali and Ashlyn were together they didn’t care where they were or what they were doing. Sure, in the morning they were both going to wish they had gone for that walk on the beach instead of pounding shots, but that was life. Shit happened and Ali and Ashlyn Krieger had learned that the hard way, several times over. Neither of them had come from a big family and they really didn’t understand how hard it was going to be to raise four little kids. But they were doing it. They weren’t perfect and their kids weren’t perfect and their lives weren’t perfect. But they were happy and healthy and their hearts were full far more often than not. They both had jobs they loved and friends they would do anything for. They each had loving families that were eager to participate in their lives and routinely went out of their way to prove that to them. 

2025 had taken some people from them, like Mrs. Riley, their beloved cleaning lady who was so much more than that to them, and old Marjorie from Maine, the straggler Ashlyn had befriended after helping her finish the Boston Marathon back in 2017. 2025 had given them some of the most remarkable high points in their lives too: Ashlyn’s dream of opening The Academy had come to marvelous fruition; they had a new goddaughter – Whitney’s beautiful baby Becca; Ali was about to start officially getting paid by Knight-Harris because the company they started with their own four hands had become successful enough to be able to do so; they had gone on one of the best vacations of their lives even though Ashlyn had to call a soccer game every third day while they were in Germany; Drew started first grade, lost his first tooth, and survived a summer without his best friend; Josie stopped napping, started preschool and stood up to her bullies, and fell in love with the piano; Dodge got all of his teeth in, learned a whole bunch of new words, and got his big boy bed; Lily had her unplanned phrenectomy thanks to her sister, got her big girl bed and was completely potty trained; and Meg became a teenager and made some grown up decisions as well as some immature ones. And even the hard things that 2025 handed to Ali and Ashlyn like the ongoing ovarian cancer threat, the Sam Machado mess, and the keeper’s struggle turning 40, had strengthened both women and made their bond stronger and deeper when it was all said and done. 

So maybe they’d want a do-over on the end of their NYE that year, but maybe not. Maybe it had happened just as it was meant to. Maybe they both needed to let off some steam that night, dance like fools and drink too much. They hadn’t made a scene or embarrassed themselves or the Christophers at the club, so what was the big deal? They could reflect and walk on the beach tomorrow while they nursed their hangovers and had people around to help with their kids. Yeah, that sounded like a good plan to welcome in 2026. With the Kriegers, as long as they were together and feeling connected, anything was possible and there was never a dull moment. 2026 would soon be full of more wonderful examples of their life and their family and their struggles and their successes and their love. That love that Ashlyn and Ali shared, fortified by both the good and the bad, the difficult and the easy, continued to be the thing that mattered the most. As long as they had each other they would find a way through whatever else came their way. Together. Always together.


End file.
